VOLUME V Issue 1 St. John's College, Santa Fe, NM NOV. 1987 THE DE-YUPPIFICATION Naturally times are tough for those who bought at the top and sold at the bottom, and those whose OF WALL STREET assets are primarily in stocks. (Comment from the College Treasurer on this matter is forthcoming.) by MaHwell Cassidy But most of us can claim not to have done this. As many of our readers know by now, on Monday, Oct. 18, 1987 One class of people, on the other (Hereinafter Black Monday), an hand, fits right into that historic event took place. The Dow category. The Yuppies. The Jones Industrial Average soared "Coffee Generation". The "Yes, You 508.32 points downward: the Can Have It All" group. Already, biggest one-day drop in history. just a week from the crash, BMW It makes Black Thursday in 1929 sales have dropped off. Luxury look minor. condominium prices on the Upper East Side have plummeted as yuppies But fear not! For this crash pull out of real estate deals. Yuppies everywhere have lost their will not make us all into Charlie shirts. Chaplin characters (leading economic analysts agree). Instead, the crash appears to be leading Oddly enough, though, the toward the de-yuppification of Wall -entrenched rich will be largely Street, and perhaps ultimately, to unaffected. With diversified the de-yuppification of America portfolio positions, their losses » itself. _ — should be minimal. Large institutions like the Ford For a moment, let us consider Foundation have had minimal losses events of the 20's. The bull considering. Some problems may market (rising stock prices) had occur with Individual Retirement gone on for almost a decade; all Accounts (IRAs), and pension funds, were convinced that the market but analysts believe that, on the would continue to rise. It had whole, these should be safe. It is proven itself the best investment really the speculative investor who in the world to buy stock. So has lost this time. successful were those who owned stock, that enormous quantities of ' cent. P6 ■ stock were bought on margin (on credit). Everyone from the street- “Mil: a review of § sweeper to the local millionaires had a significant steak in the ’s latest i| market. Eventually, people had borrowed all the money they could ialburn! Also, an li get on margin, and could no longer buy stock; everyone had bought as ijopinion offered on the I much stock as they could. In that rsport" of hacky-sack I situation, when a few people sell out to, say, pay a dentist bill, the price comes down. But the thing everyone used as collateral for their margin loans was the stock itself; when the price of that stock falls, the broker asks for more collateral or it will be forced to sell off the stock to pay the loan. But no one had anything more to put up. The stocks were sold. All at once. Crash. Millions of people lost everything they had in this world. Millionaires were made paupers overnight. Businesses failed for lack of capital. People were left with no work. Depression ensued. But the crash of '87 is nothing like that, praised be the prime mover. Most people today are not at all invested in the stock market. Margin buying on the scale of the 20's is simply no longer done. Businesses are not failing. Stock brokers are not jumping out of the windows of Wall Street. Letters to the editor \

Dear Sir, students present in saying that It has come to mv attention they were behind this artistic that the the factions in charge and sensitive student 100 of our "school" have once again percent. The guard clearly did begun to assert - their not know how to react now that he administrative choke-hold on the had been confronted with the knowledge thirsty members of our blatant, ridiculous nature of his scholastic c ommu nit y. A prime assertations. He showed the kind example of this recurring of surprise that power-mad oppression occurred last authority figures always show Wednesday in the coffee shop, A when confronted with the truth. certain student was exercising He just kept insisting, in his freedom of expression, a desperation, that the chairs were right, I might add, granted us for sitting and were dangerous by the Constitution of this great balanced in stacks five chairs land of ours, by balancing chairs high. So then the student wisely in what I think were quite informed the guard of the legal attractive patterns. After a action that he would take against productive and expressive session the guards and the school should of chair balancing, one that this repression of his artistic involved every chair in the self continue. This school would coffee shop in this artistic be a better place if all students endeavor, this student was expressed themselves with such blatantly accosted by one of the beauty. guards. This guard claimed that the chairs were not intended to Another such incident be used as art but were instead occurred when a student was meant to be used solely for- unobtrusively eating a three foot sitting. Nell, what a limited submarine sandwich in the view of the world this man had, cafeteria while enjoying a beer thinking that a chair was mono­ to wash it down. Just then he was functional. This student did not confronted by the fascist know whether to be offended at cafeteria police. They claimed his affronting manner or sorrouted that beer was not to be consumed by his 1ack of inspiration. Ne11 , within the school buildings or on the student politely replied, the school grounds. The student "Hey buddy, ever hear of then informed his antagonist that inalienable rights. I got em, and the school is not a country, if I want to use every chair in given the power to create its own here, I wi11." The poor guard was 1 aws. An y per son or in s tit u tion so shocked by this student's self attempting to establish its own will he knew not how to replv-> set of 1aws within this coun t r y except with the *'^oisi~ wti'l 1---be -Bobjetrf—~i:ro~ immediate rationalization, "Nell, where are legal action. The people have the other students supposed to spoken. sit?" To which the student incitefully said, "People have Sal 1 arriander died for art, is it too much to (with two 1 ^ s) ask them to stand up for it?" I was there and I feel safe in speaking for the rest of the

( " Dear Editor: MOON Su wiiij'ji; ruiiiiiriy tfie paper? is John Winston TobH BarJoip? Are ijou? fire the tuio Dave johnsion 0ififiser of gou iporking together? I don't Dave Marquez ItfitG*'' cucn knoip ipho I'm uirfting to. fom l.ijparello fmefr/tJc Please eepiain. “ confused rHilOHlAi HOARD Ea. Toby Eariow did put out the Scott Baiter. Maixwcii Cassidy, Stevej lirsi issue of The Moon this year, Hkler, Debbie Fieig, Bill ‘ Hogan.j ^'iiiCh i had fJOthing to do with. J put Catherine Macmtosh.Danilo Marrone. out this, the second issue, and Toby iMafrsrobie Cohn/,mk BarlcjT?,^ had nothing to do with this. I ntvsei! ant not sure what will happen in the luture- li^e may trade off every ocher issue we may ronsoiidaie and 2 work together, i don i know what will happen rfv.i.sii I iMtti* ii»V/iyi!iiS<0 il il^y H-sackers are never sated.J \^j\j d uiiba iki£i*^inju u y They are proud of their ski)}, as well they should be. they have acquirct By Tom Luparello ©F technique and stamina m batting ball around with their inner solcsj It is invigorating a release'- f| quote one more visible sack er onl Bele Noire campus t hig .sack on V.ampiis-I a new by Bryan Ferry J mav have one of those hard B.S.O.C! I am weii aw'are of ail these canvas bails thrown at my chest for things. guys Very good) touching this one, but an observance rationaliZatioris, Aiii t it iiicc hc*w St.j niusi he slated; Johns has taught u.s to justify For those of you who are not everything w^c need to? Tell me you familiar with Mr. Ferry he is most It masturbation were publicly notably the former lead sinoer of w^ouidn t much rather the time sKii! . He also was one of the acceptabie.hacky-sack would release, sunn'' afternould be park-fulls,j work by Chester Kamen. Die hard with, they all come in the same subway-f uMs, lunchroom-fulls of) Ferry fans will recognize the reguiation si7e its lor ihis reason masturbators. I I purposefully suspicious absence of Rhett Davies, alone i assume the inv-entor of the refrained from wTiting ' men) who produced much of Br yan' s. K-sack io be a man. Wouitln i w arn earlier work, although he does masturbating .1 1 know' the rebuttal per f orm on the a I bum . We II Rhett'' s one guy s sack bigger than another's, to follow If i (Ion i mciiifle women m loss is our gain. Although Mr. !,ook what happened to motorcycles this hypotheiicai state.”" Davies is no slouch as a producer, there is a slight improvement and guns; had to have a bigger one. Bui H-sack is neater. There Oh alright, o.k, I can hear [wit h ou t him on this album. 0th er isn t the trauma connected to it that .notable names on the Jacket are dozens of male ^^oices in protest: public display of one's genitalia Johhny Marr (lead guitarist of the nonce the rechnique the amount ot would bring. Your parents can ISmiths),

\ oV\ S fe: “MLrv^ OEPiwe. THtic. What am I waiting for Gould it be some kind of a way in You could shut my mouth with toenails Se.ivicu'v; c—• if I said that again A dream of someone sleeping but is it you or me s - Darkness climbing up one leg virvv/c. - We roll over and shrug it off The clock ticks and the handle doesn't turn The T.V. shows end and the phone doesn't ring What am I waiting for Fingers reach for, what? and touch only more fingers Could it be some kind of a way ih? Here you are and all directions are away And all that time you were never there And all that touch all the rustled tangles The kindergarten pictures uselessly preserved and filed Always different, always the same v All the afternoons What am I waiting for? -Scott Baxter eT)ce

Well, hello dears. My name is Dear Prudence, Prudtmce/s Horoscopes for Prudence Penelope Pursepockel. I'm At 3l. John's I have learned that thUt Ttonth: here to help all you poor dears with the principles of being are your personal problems! and earn mathematical, and that my needsj Artes- tjpu wHXf tvin- one miUion enough money to keep my darling while part ol being and therefore also tfofllars little cat, Mr. Whiskers, in the mathematical, have influence neither Friskee's Buffetl). So if any of you on these principles, nor on being gwnini- you ivilt haruL in ofif your have problems, just let me know, and beyond mysell What should I do? papers fate 111 do my best to help out, you M^iCt yet marrtecC MY TIP FOR THE MONTH: - Distraught Senior (ioodnessi The chilly weather libm- you uHlX Cose a- Vunb snuck up on us quicker than a bunny! Dear Senior- Hot c(x:oa is just the thing to serve to That depends on how good Koyitnrlus- ijoia witt yet momecC your friends on those frosty nights. you are with numbers. Perhaps With marshmallows and a non-toxic you sbouicj buy yourself a good Imtcrr- you wiit he attacktxL by a doy jpermanent marker you can serve caiculato]'. (mugs of happiness with smiling you miyfit turn in ail your (snowman heads bobbing on the papers on time j sun ace ( iuaranteed to delight even rnoo;,H.Ti Sol I the grumpiest guests. (' Frowny faces (can be fun, iwl) iM- notfiiny wiilhapprn

Pisces- you tuUJ. yet morrinC Dear Prudence, Lat week 1 woke up to find I had grown a third eye, smack in the Inurus- a muiyet luitt confront you, middle of my forehead. This would be to he- i^ur brother fine, but Ive got a big date this Saturday! I dont want to lose my . Inprlrom- you M^on'tCte chance with this girl What can I. do?

Unyielding Entropy -Worried by 3-D The mu'tila'ted. multi—faceted miiror Dear Worried, Moved morosely along the 2x10m; Take a lesson from the kids Mystical and mysteriaus, at Villa Linda mall. A kung-tu Perplexing and perfidious, , Anulling and augmenting stylo ’headban subsides On baby's bottom, pink and young. The trees tu2m ITI be your diaper strong and tall To meet the onslaught of the tide. - Captain Logos ■And c.''itc.n you. poop-nead, when you fall

To S. Zell - Daiiilo Mari'oiie Keep the day job, honey From D Johnston 5 6 Some analysts believe that the wm Market is now entering a Bear coni. (downward) phase and will not stop until a Dow of 800 is reached. (The Dow is currently at about 1800, 150 points off from THE FUTURE FOR THE MARKET yesterday). Others say that a Bull (upward) Market can absorb up to a Anyone who tells you they can 50% loss (down to about 1700) and predict the stock market is a fool, and the more money they lost on still be generally on the rise to a Black Monday, the bigger the fool possible high of 3500. they are. But certain trends in the Market can be examined, and It is clear, at least, that the possibilities looked into. On experts don't know what they're Monday the 26th, the market edged talking about. yet lower due to jittery foreign investors bailing out. Meanwhile, WHAT ONE MIGHT DO foreign markets, led by our Market Disclaimer: Anyone who does what and fueled by jittery Americans pulling out, plummeted to new lows. I suggest loses a boatload of money will have no one but themselves to It seems panic has gripped the world, and when investors are blame. Following someone else's panicky, they do not invest in advice can be even more stupid than "unstable” foreign markets. The following one's own. But they may Japanese seem to be sour on America have consolation in the fact that I in general right now. The Hong Kong will have lost a boatload myself. Market has gone wild and is in very serious trouble. (Trading was Keeping that in mind, if you have suspended for four days, but as tons of un-used, un-wanted money soon as trading resumed, the market lying around your bank account, you might want to invest some of it now crashed.) This Bearish (downward) exchange between the different in the market. What should you markets of the world will keep in mind? Well, first of all, eventually even itself out when all the price. investors owning stock in corporations from another country But the price of a stock is a have sold it all off to buyers from deceptive thing. Its rather like that country. This will remove one the price of a steak. You look on source of downward pressure on the the package, and it says $5.95. Market. (Source: Wall Street But another says $4.52. Which is a Journal). better value? If they're both fillet mignon, then quality is not what we use to judge between them; and price is not good enough by itself either, because they may be different sizes of steak. Everyone knows to look at the price per pound or, if its not there, to estimate it. cont F*

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Less Than Zero movie is a far cry from the teeny- books cont. bopper, brat-packer film one might Oh boy, it > happening. Less Than have espected. But, that's not to say Zero, novel of 85 by the then 20 it s good. Although there are some thri-atened Grizzlys. the year old Bennington College student brilliant shots! cinematographicaiiyi timber land, and i.oxic waste.-Like, Hret .b'aston Elhs i? now a movie. I ve tn the him, the story, interestingly r-ay, Polanski's Cliinatown the seen the movie. J read the book, and I enough, is the weak element. A slick, i-rutagoriist starts out w'orking read his jusi-released foliow-up, The highly polished production, but the only to unra’/ei but ends up fluies oi—^Ufacuoh . I think were story leaves something to be desired. v/atching as his life dissolves and ueaiing with something big here, Towards the beginning of the film, evpiodes around him, his struggle biggei than a liash-in-the-pan hip there's a scene where Qay is a party ending i)niy in an attempt to auteur i like Tama Janowitz, Jay that struck me as highly reminiscent understand the forces that attack Mclnerncy ) , Ellis is, undoubtedly, of The Great Gatshv , another book him. not to desttoy them but only one ol the most well-known writers of with a movie counterpart, although 1 to know the moment someone who has gained think the movie) the Redford version I The only- problem with this notoriety a celebrity ) this month s does a tar better )ob than the movie novel IS cocaine. I mean, Milo does Interview features a mcick interview Less Than Zero does. I was, in the a lot of It, all the time It's hard ■with Brei, replete with photographs of end, both disappointed and delighted to identiiy with a hard-boiiecl the young author lighting cigarettes at with the movie disappointed that protagonist who has surh a stupid various hip spots in New York City), they butchered the book, delighted nabit.i Ke also drinks aiot, but His debut novel. Less Than Zero . is that it was well done and not turned ue tec lives always have, and a shocker, the stony of Clay, a rich boy into a 1 arce tor 16 year-olds to enjoy cornpared to Nick and Nora, this from Los Angeles, who, after his first The second book, The Rules of guy s practically a tea-totler.jBut, semester at an eastern college, returns A-tJraction , I don i care for a great tne ■'way I got over it vv^as seeing home to make sense of the life he deal. One critic said something to the v/hat a k effect. I always wondered what the vrurniey vcants to paint of the taxe place during his Christmas death of the novel would be, and this nahit The other thing T tViought V acalion, as Clay makes a w’hirlwind is it Told in narrative through three aPout drugs in this novel, tour of the people and places once so characters) very much in a Faulkner -u-mpared to those used constantly tamihar to him WouldnT want to give esqe vain I , the book describes the Ui ^ Brett Easton Ellis' stupid away too much, but some of the emoitonal* sezuai> interactions of modern novels, or Jay themes touched upon are- drug u.set of students at a small liberal-arts college rJadnei ney s one shot of idiocy course). pornography. and in New Hampshire, h s one of those , IS that prosUluiion. it is even more bfx)ks ihat begins .and..." and ends Tnose ’-d'io are bearing out the interesting to note that Ellis had a real ..and... . as if to suggest we are un!-)earabVf»isolated winter.': tn our diary to base all this upon. The style is looking at a BMW without the northern mountain and plain evocative most strongly of bumpers', just a fragmented section of ■j-tatics nave, ii not a condoneable, Hemingway and Faulkner, but there is these people's lives. Lots of ioiagery, at least a more understandable something unique about it at the same no substance, God forbid this should for hard drugs than those time and l suspect that in the future become a trend in modern ’^Titingl if brilliant little yupsters like the we will refer to other authors as being It isn t already one). ! don t two other authors(or like us, for like Ellis. A potent book. recommend this book unless you re either really bored or actually thad matter.i it seems that the the movie, which opened Friday at peopif. of the norr.hf’rn provinces intrigued bv my synopsis. viha Linda Mall, is based on the book, I hear more people here) at St. wdli always be trying to kill but there are, to say the least, some Iheniielves with eitherdrugs or John s) talking about this author and major discrepancies betw'een the tw-o. his w’orks than any other current booze, or, if all else fails, then the Marring brat packer Andrew Lc-xcni.im. Idaho. method author, and most of the talk is bad, McCarthy as Clay, and directed by crilical. The movie add fuel to oej [iom.ti'aleu by Papa Manek Kanievska < who also did the Hemingway in '61. these peoples fires, but, mark my labulous Another Countrv ) the w'orits, this author will not fade Crun'iley then takes the best of the detective ndvcl's formula and successfully takes it to the new hut not distant territory. His s.tyiP i.s one of cle.^r di.^iogue mixed v/ith prosaic character descriptions that bring to rnind other good •modern -wTiters like Thomas IvlocGuane and Jim Harrison. It takes about three or four hours to through, the maximum one e^/er ^-'ants to spend on a riere.-Tive novel ■

photo; D. Marquez CONT.

Stock is the same way. For stocks we have two numbers to help the consumer: The p/e ratio, and the yield. The p/e is the price of the stock divided by the earnings per share. If X company has 100 shares of stock outstanding and earned $250.00 last quarter, and is selling for 50 dollars a share, the p/e is 5 -- equivalent to 20% earnings per share. But a company CL. will usually give its owners only a portion of this profit, and keep the rest to reinvest in the company. The amount actually paid to the owners (stockholders) is the dividend. Suppose X paid out $25 in dividends that quarter -- that's $1 per share per year, or a yield of 1/50 or 2%. Thus the p/e and yield give you an idea of the jHEY YOUlDon’i like this price per value of the stock. jpaper? Do something- Many people believe that any stock with earnings in excess of isubmissions of all sorts will inflation (currently about 5%) is a good deal. But keep in mind that jbe taken at the switchboard, last quarter's earnings are not |c/o The Moon next quarter's earnings.

An interesting trend in this crash is that OTC stocks (less gamng is More Profane man Acrimony popular over-the-counter stocks not sold on any exchange) have taken a wearing clothes saying sir disproportionate beating in this tor someone you do not respect crash, and may represent extremely keeping all your language pure good buys, even though they are -though you're fully^animal still going down. But be wary of lui^ting, eating, shitting out companies that may fail. dieing just like anyone? o hing known can be more sure- I myself bought stock on Tuesday You mustn't let them detect after Black Monday: an OTC company You’re an ape Yoh're an ape that had a p/e of 4 and is posting Don't belch don record profit by making rubber this lying is you're smart -n \r ys noblest art gloves and other dental and take from„ your soul the mortal part prophylactic supplies in the midst Be courteous ^ of an AIDS epidemic. It went up, and I made about $200 dollars, and now it's down, and I lost about $400 dollars (or $200 from the start). But the yield and earnings per dollar are proportionally up, and I'm thinking about buying some more. who talks about his flesh to die Another stock I was interested in in^vo^® language? shut them up is the major manufacturer of in yourself and others - « ' up condoms. If i had bought that on honestyi obscenity Monday at $49+3/4, since it is now clamp it down with manners at $55, that would be an 11% gain we re all intellect and spirit now, aren't we? in a week. But its all-time high, in the beginning of the AIDS crisis was 151. -Anonymous If social trends continue as they are, these stocks must go up as the epidemic worsens. Of course, someone could find a cure tomorrow (one of the pharmaceutical stocks shooting up) and I'd have nothing special.

But remember Black Monday. She reaches with trembling hand, with shameful, Someone sold IBM and made bundles unwilling hand, like a flower, but out of tuna. in seconds and someone else bought The author never told her about this chapter. She cries in it from him and lost his shirt. her unasked guilt but reaches yet, putting her . ; You never know which one you are hand away from safety, out of sight, knowing God or till it's too late. Devil might soon take it and the feeling it holds. She reaches, and her arm grows weary supporting the weight of her anticipation. The hours go by heedless of her like on their way to work. Soon the wrinkles form a net around her of silk with lead weight pulling down at the corners, sinking into the earth, finally, she reaches, and her arm crumbles to dust yet outstretched. 8 Scott Baiter