Confrontations with the Unconscious :: an Intensive Study of the Dreams of Women Learning Self-Defense. Deborah S
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University of Massachusetts Amherst ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst Masters Theses 1911 - February 2014 1992 Confrontations with the unconscious :: an intensive study of the dreams of women learning self-defense. Deborah S. Stier University of Massachusetts Amherst Follow this and additional works at: https://scholarworks.umass.edu/theses Stier, Deborah S., "Confrontations with the unconscious :: an intensive study of the dreams of women learning self-defense." (1992). Masters Theses 1911 - February 2014. 2212. Retrieved from https://scholarworks.umass.edu/theses/2212 This thesis is brought to you for free and open access by ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst. It has been accepted for inclusion in Masters Theses 1911 - February 2014 by an authorized administrator of ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst. For more information, please contact [email protected]. CONFRONTATIONS WITH THE UNCONSCIOUS: AN INTENSIVE STUDY OF THE DREAMS OF WOMEN LEARNING SELF-DEFENSE A Thesis Presented by DEBORAH S. STIER Submitted to the Graduate School of the University of Massachusetts in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of MASTER OF SCIENCE February 1992 Psychology CONFRONTATIONS WITH THE UNCONSCIOUS: AN INTENSIVE STUDY OF THE DREAMS OF WOMEN LEARNING SELF-DEFENSE A Thesis Presented by DEBORAH S. STIER Approved as to style and content by: Murrayray M. Schwartz, ClVa ir Sally^fA. Freeman, Member Ronnie .i|»nof f-Bulman, Member D^avid M. Todd /^-Member C_jGharles'"E. CI if tc«1, Acting Chair Department of Psychology — — — DREAMS All night the dark buds of dreams open richly. In the center of every petal is a letter, and you imagine if you could only remember and string them all together they would spell the answer. It is a long night, and not an easy one you have so many branches, and there are diversions birds that come and go, the black fox that lies down to sleep beneath you, the moon staring with her bone-white eye. Finally you have spent all the energy you can and you drag from the ground the muddy skirts of your roots and leap awake with two or three syllables like water in your mouth and a sense of loss — a memory not yet of a word, certainly not yet the answer only how it feels when deep in the tree all the locks click open, and the fire surges through the wood, and the blossoms blossom. —Mary Oliver ACKNOWLEDGMENTS My thanks go to the six women who allowed me to sit with them for many hours, and who shared their experiences as dreamers and as fighters so freely with me. I thank as well the members of my committee, Sally Freeman, Ronnie Janof f-Bulman, David Todd, and, in particular, my chair, Murray Schwartz, who each brought a different and valuable perspective to the consideration of my work. Finally, I thank Anne, Delilah, and Wadi for the meaningful companionship they provided while I was absorbed with this project. iv . ABSTRACT CONFRONTATIONS WITH THE UNCONSCIOUS: AN INTENSIVE STUDY OF THE DREAMS OF WOMEN LEARNING SELF DEFENSE FEBRUARY 1992 DEBORAH S. STIER, B.A. , HARVARD UNIVERSITY M.S., UNIVERSITY OF MASSACHUSETTS Directed by: Professor Murray M. Schwartz This study is an intensive exploration and description of the ways in which aspects of a salient life experience are reflected, elaborated, and transformed in dream material. At the heart of the study are the dream accounts of a group of women who were participating in the two week intensive self- defense course known as Model Mugging. Each of the project participants engaged in a set of three in-depth individual interviews over a three month period and kept a dream log during the course and immediately thereafter. This material is brought together in the form of four case studies which trace possible lines of connection between waking and dream life for each of the participants The study suggests that the dreams that were relevant to the participants' experiences in the self- defense course were not only those that dealt explicitly V . with themes of physical confrontation. Rather, the dreams covered a broad range of topics that drew on participants' important life experiences, both past and present, as they link up with participants' concerns and aims regarding the self-defense course. The case studies suggest that each participant was grappling with a different set of concerns during the course. In addition to their shared desire to learn self-defense, individual participants were also aiming to recapture memories of childhood sexual abuse, to address ongoing shame about the body, to negotiate separation, and to connect with feelings. The dreams reported provide valuable information on the process and meaning of these struggles The study concludes by addressing some of the different meanings that physical confrontation may have had when it did appear in dreams, by considering the ways in which apparently similar waking experiences were handled differently in dream space by different dreamers, and by exploring the possible functions that recording and discussing dreams in the context of the study may have served for each of the project participants TABLE OF CONTENTS Page ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ABSTRACT ^ Chapter 1. INTRODUCTION AND REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE 1 2. METHOD 6 Participants 6 Interviews and Dream Logs 7 Interpretive Approach 11 3. CASE STUDY: WENDY LEBLANC 15 Biographical Sketch 15 Course Experience 19 Dream Experience 22 Preliminary Summary 24 The Dreams 2 5 Conclusion 60 4. CASE STUDY: DONNA SMITH 62 Biographical Sketch 62 Course Experience 67 Dream Experience 7 0 Preliminary Summary 72 The Dreams 73 Conclusion 94 5. CASE STUDY: KATHY LOMBARDO 96 Biographical Sketch 96 Course Experience 98 Dream Experience 102 Preliminary Summary 105 The Dreams 106 Conclusion 132 vii 6. CASE STUDY: MEG ULLMAN 3^34 Biographical Sketch Course 3^3. Experience 140 Dream *.!*.!*.'.!*.*.*.*.*.*. Experience 145 Preliminary Summary 150 The Dreams !!!!!!!** 151 Conclusion !!!!!!!! 194 7. CONCLUSION g APPENDICES A. PRELIMINARY WRITTEN MATERIAL 204 *[* B. INTERVIEW OUTLINES 2O8 C. DREAM ACCOUNTS : WENDY LEBLANC. ................. 211 D. DREAM ACCOUNTS: DONNA SMITH 22 0 E. DREAM ACCOUNTS: KATHY LOMBARDO 22 6 F. DREAM ACCOUNTS: MEG ULLMAN 2 38 BIBLIOGRAPHY 2 58 viii CHAPTER 1 INTRODUCTION AND REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE Dreams are private experiences that cannot be shared, except in the secondary telling of stories. Often, the retelling, too, is a private experience, an exchange between loved ones upon waking or the privileged communication between psychotherapist and client in the intimacy of the consulting room. When some stories make their way to a larger audience in the context of good literature or careful psychoanalytic writing, for example, we often feel drawn into the world of the dreamer, coming as close as we might to the first telling and the experience that underlies it. This happens most readily where dream stories are presented in a context that integrates information about the dreamer's history, current life circumstances and, where applicable, about the relationship between the dreamer and the one who has listened to the dream. In the clinical psychoanalytic literature, this type of satisfying, in-depth account is limited, by and large, to the dreams of people in treatment. There is, however, a small research literature that attempts to widen the range of individuals whose dreams are explored, while trying to preserve, even deepen, the understanding of the relationship between dream records and the dreamer's life context. Most of this research 1 . focuses on the relationship between waking experience and subsequent dream experience in groups of dreamers. Some research in this area has used laboratory dream collection techniques to look at pre-sleep events and the dreams that follow. Early work was able to trace the impact of emotionally charged films (Witkin & Lewis, 1965), while later work detailed the effects of stress in a group therapy context (Breger et al., 1971). A similar method was used to look at changes in dream accounts collected just before participants underwent major surgery and then during the post-operative period (Breger et al, 1971) Dream accounts have been collected outside the sleep laboratory as well. Some of this work has been retrospective, calling on people to remember their dreams from earlier distinctive periods in their lives. An example of this type of inquiry is a study that documented differences in the dreams of former prisoners of war before, during, and after captivity (Balson, cited in Weiss & Sampson, 1986) . Other work has traced shifts in dreaming patterns originally established through traumatic life experiences. One study, for example, identified changes in the combat nightmares of veterans while they were engaged in psychotherapy looks (Wilmer, 1986) . Finally, there is some work that at the representation of current life events in dreams 2 that individuals record at home and then share in the research context. This work is exemplified in a study of the dreams of two expectant fathers during the three week period prior to the birth of their children (Zayas, 1987) . These studies vary considerably in the extent to which they capture and reflect the richness of each dreamer's experience. Collectively, however, they suggest a set of elements whose inclusion in the design of a study is likely to facilitate writing that may draw the reader closer to the experience of the dreamer. First, it is essential to establish a trusting, collaborative relationship between the participant and the researcher, one that allows for joint reflection and the exchange of critical information. This includes data about the dreamer's dream history, personal history, and current life situation, as well as the dreamer's commentary and associations about dream and waking material. Second, it is important to collect the dream accounts in series, not as isolated events. This makes it possible to carefully consider any changes that occur over time.