A TINDERELLA STORY Story
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THE TALE OF THE MODERN DATER A TINDERELLA STORY Story THE CHRONICLES OF TINDERELLA A Tinderella Story POINT OF view: It’s 2020 and you’re a 21 year old girl who is recently single because you’re boyfriend of 3 years cheated on INTRODUCTIONyou - making you somewhat distrustful of men. When you first got into a relationship, dating apps weren’t around but now you’re single again every one seems to be using them. You’re starting to feel ready to date again and you see an ad pop up for a new dating app introductionthat all the girls are talking about. You decide it’s time to give it a try. Like many young girls you have an affinity towards the bad boy types, tall, dark and handsome, the kinds that ruin your life. But as a well educated, attractive young girl you know that you should try opting for a nice and sweet boy your mum would approve of, but will you? Intro / POV 1 A Tinderella Story One way that the introduction of technology and the internet into our lives has greatly effected human nature, is through the way it has impacted our romantic relationships. Like many things in the POINT OF 21st century, dating is yet another thing that has been converted into something highly marketable and instant. Instead of going into a bar and hoping to find at least one potential suitor, that you then have to build up enough courage to approach, you can now swipe through as many as you like from the comfort of your own sofa. The barrier of the screen makes the fear of rejection significantly reduce. No reply? Move on to the next, no problem. Nowadays, putting yourself ‘out there’ doesn’t mean getting dressed up and actually going outside to meet people. It means view: choosing a selection of your best selfie’s and setting up a dating profile to try and attract the perfect mate as soon as possible. Mobile dating went mainstream about five years ago; by 2012 It’s 2020 and you’re a 21 year old girl who is recently it was overtaking online dating. In February, one study reported single because you’re boyfriend of 3 years cheated on there were nearly 100 million people—perhaps 50 million on you - making you somewhat distrustful of men. When Tinder alone—using their phones as a sort of all-day, every-day, you first got into a relationship, dating apps weren’t handheld singles club, where they might find a sex partner as around but now you’re single again every one seems easily as they’d find a cheap flight to Florida. to be using them. You’re starting to feel ready to date The ease of online dating has made it potentially easier to find again and you see an ad pop up for a new dating app the perfect partner, or just a casual hook up. You can be talking to that all the girls are talking about. You decide it’s time to a number of different people at one time, and they’re all none the give it a try. wiser. Eventually one will probably stand out as your favourite, making the selection easy-peasy. You know what they look like, what they’re interested in, their job and where they live in Like many young girls you have an affinity towards the an instant, making it much easier to judge a book by it’s cover bad boy types, tall, dark and handsome, the kinds that and swipe left or right. But can this relatively inauthentic dating ruin your life. But as a well educated, attractive young method lead to authentic relationships? How does this method girl you know that you should try opting for a nice and of selection effect the way we view potential partners both in the sweet boy your mum would approve of, but will you? apps and in real life. This publication aims to highlight the often fickle, shallow and narcisstic attitudes towards dating that popular apps such as tinder has encourage in our society. Intro / POV 1 A Tinderella Story A Tinderella Story CONTENTS: Phasecontents: 1: Making the perfect profile (p4-11) Phase 2 : Navigating the field(p 12-19) Phase 3: Small talk (p20 -39) Phase 4: Seal the Deal (p40-41) Happily Ever After? (p42) Glossary (p43-46) * What’s this? A new app. Perhaps I should just download it and see what it’s like? Could be fun ...* 2 Contents Contents 3 A Tinderella Story A Tinderella Story STEP 1: ...THEN CHOOSE YOUR I deffo want a full body OKAY AREpicture. DATING I ’v so I have to choose e APPS b MAKING e pictures e n go 5 PHOTOS. in areg dating USto MORE Only 5? the gym after all ... I think NARCISSISTIC?apps making I should start headsh us more a o ith t, y I feel like I W ou k n should be o narcissistic w , showing it off. that just makes sense really. But I’ll choose a smiley one so they know I’m approachable. **Okay, yeah .. that looks about right** 4 Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile 5 A Tinderella Story A Tinderella Story STEP 1: ...THEN The our generation is growing up at an exciting yet terrifying CHOOSEtime: a time when connections can be made instantaneously, yet meaningful connections are becoming harder and harder to find. We are being conditioned to believe that we are entitled I deffo want a full body YOURto an unlimited number of choices as we swipe through what is virtually a human meat market. The problem is, the number of choices we have is doing little to assuage the need for fulfilling and meaningful relationships. We are nowOKAY looking at what some picture. experts have aptly called “the dawn of the dating apocalypse”. I ’v so I have to choose e Those who are looking for casual dates and sex may be b e picturessatisfied with the likes of Tinder, one of the most popular e n dating apps used by singles, but those who are looking for g something more 5meaningful PHOTOS. may be traumatised by the number oi ng of people who pretend to be looking for a serious relationship to while misrepresenting their true intentions. Studies show that t Only 5? he g deception is common on these apps, with users creating an ym aft illusory image of who they are and what they are looking for, er all ... I resultingthink in frustrating romantic encounters. I shouldIs ourstart culture becoming more narcissistic? Research indicates that a higher number of younger people are meeting the clinical criteria for Narcissistic a he Personalityadsho Disorder and that we are now ith t, y I feel like I living in whatW might be called “the age ofo entitlement”.u While there are multiple factors that contribute to the rise k of narcissism in our society, access to numerous methods of connectingn with others should be o in the digital age undoubtedly exacerbates thew need to be seen as “special and unique.” Accompanying this need, is a blatant dehumanization of others in the search for attention, popularity and admiration. Some believe that dating apps’ visual-heavy format encourages showing it off. people to choose their partnersthat morejust makessuperficially sense (and really. with racial or sexual stereotypesBut in mind); I’ll choose others argue a smiley that humans one so choose their partners with physical attraction in mind even without the help of Tinder. they know I’m approachable. **Okay, yeah .. that looks about right** 4 Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile 5 A Tinderella Story A Tinderella Story So what next. so they know I like to travel ... plus That’s it! my bum looks pretty good. I need a photo of me out having fun with my .. friends ... le And finally b ’m a good ia I laugh c ow and so kn y e h ... t o s RIGHT, SO oh what the hell, another Next I’ll choose one head shot, why not. of me on the beach 6 Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile 7 A Tinderella Story A Tinderella Story oss funny? But not STEP 2: e acr like m I’ I co m o d t r w y i WRITE YOUR o n H g t o b e f u n n y ? j u ? s t y l i n k Right e n I u ’ f m y l a l c a t bionow this u is the hard bit ... what do I Hiya! I’m Sophie, 21 y/o from Brighton. Let’s grab a drink and see who’s funnier? want people to know ... I don’t No,THE FACTS want to write too much because then people will think I’m thethat’s facts too cringe. weird ... Sophie. 21. Brighton. Phsychology student. BUT ng straight to the te nothi wri point or is it n’t ca otherwise they’ll think I’m boring and I have nothing to say. just blunt? Ugh this is so hard. 8 Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile Phase 1: Make the Perfect Profile 9 A Tinderella Story A Tinderella Story oss funny? But not STEP 2: e acr like m I’ I co m o d t ~ Online dating, is now one of the most frequently used r w y i WRITEservices YOUR on the Internet, and one of its largest revenue o n H g generators.