[email protected] Vo l u m e CXI, Nu m b e r 16 Pa s a d e n a , Ca l i f o r n i a Ma r c h 8, 2010 Photo by Jonathan Tsai Music Groups Perform at Intercollegiate Festivals

Fluid Dynamics and but has in recent years been a sophomore Timothy Wu of FD joint project of OoC and Fluid was singing “Accidentally in Out of Context Dynamics. Seven groups from Love” by the Counting Crows four different schools in the area for which he recently won the By Rick Paul attended the concert. In addition best soloist award at USC’s St a f f Wr i t e r to OoC and FD, the other groups a cappella festival, Absolut. included the Shades and Aca- OoC also competed at the In- ternational Championship of A Approximately two hundred sola from Claremont, VPR and Midnight Echo from California Cappella (ICCA), a prestigious people packed in to Dabney Hall event in the world of intercolle- on the Caltech campus last Sat- State University Northridge, and the Trojan Men from USC. giate a cappella. Although they urday to listen to live a cappella did not win the competition, performances of over two dozen Andy Matuschak, the director of Caltech’s a cappella group Fluid Dynamics performs at the Love Sucks Fluid Dynamics, observed that OoC members enjoyed the op- hits celebrating (and denigrat- portunity to learn from some of concert last Saturday. ing) love in all its varied guises. attendance at a cappella events has steadily increased over the the top groups in collegiate a Some of the performances in- cappella. Class taught by Richard Sparks, and listen to every choir’s perfor- cluded Kelly Clarkson’s “My past few years due to the efforts a Professor of Music at the Uni- mance, (an ordeal which lasted Life Would Suck Without You”, of both OoC and FD to raise the Glee Club versity of North Texas and adju- around three hours) everyone was Duffy’s “Mercy”, and a mashup profile of a cappella on campus. dicator of the festival. The Master happy to attend. of Taylor Swift’s “Love Story”. “We [Fluid Dynamics] have By Yang Hu Class consisted of a lesson given Caltech Glee Club performed been holding short impromptu Emcees, Shyam Srinivasan and St a f f Wr i t e r by Dr. Sparks to an ad hoc as- Christian Choral pieces and the Kenzie Day, entertained the au- concerts once a month to appeal sortment of singers from these well-known classic, “Shenan- dience between performances to those students on campus who colleges followed by a rehearsal doah”. Dr. Sparks commented fa- don’t necessarily feel like sitting On Saturday, February 27, of a choral piece by the diverse vorably about Caltech Glee Club, with their back and forth banter Caltech Glee Club directed by on the nature of love. The con- through a two hour concert.” group. citing strengths to be the choir’s Although a number of the six- Nancy Sulahian traveled to Cal Several hundred people ranging commitment, focus, and energy cert drew a diverse audience Lutheran University to partici- from couples in their sixties to teen students in FD have been from college students to elderly and tuning to be an area to be an singing their entire lives, there is pate in the annual Pacific South- adults attended the festival. Al- area to improve on. To address college students in their twen- west Intercollegiate Choral ties. also a fair share who began sing- most all 70 members of Caltech’s this issue, the choir hopes to find ing once they came to Caltech. Association (PSICA) festival. Glee Club participated. By tradi- a better practice room and sound Caltech’s own Fluid Dynam- Twelve universities was a part ics and Out of Context hosted “It is exciting to see singers tion, numbers were picked out equipment available at other uni- with such a diversity of back- of this event, including Occiden- of a hat. Member Jennifer Greco versities, but lacking at Caltech. the festival, which is in its thir- tal, USC, CLU, Pomona, Loyola teenth year. The student-run grounds work together to make drew the number for Caltech Glee great music,” said Matuschak. Marymount, and a handful of Club, which performed fifth. music festival was begun by Cal State colleges. Twenty nine Please see MUSIC Out of Context(OoC) in 1997, The highlight of the event for While festival attendees were members attended the Master obliged to sit on chapel benches FESTIVALS, Page 6 Stephen Hawking Lecture Undergraduates Win $51,000 For Cancelled for 2010 Patentable Ideas By Sarah Marzen ents for every student that entered competition. By Perrin Considine St a f f Wr i t e r the Intellectual Ventures competi- “At first, I wasn’t going to enter St a f f Wr i t e r tion, granting each student a low- it because I heard it was a scam,” Last month, junior Casey Glick cost, year-long period intellectual said Erenrich. “Then I realized Stephen Hawking’s annual physics lecture at Caltech won first place in Caltech’s first property protection. that my idea wouldn’t make that has been cancelled this year, due to illness. Intellectual Ventures competi- This year’s Intellectual Ven- much money anyway, so I didn’t Hawking, a world-famous physicist, spends most of tion for his microrheotronic uni- tures competition may be the first care if it was stolen.” the year working in Cambridge, England, but he is also versal logic gate, netting a cool and last such contest, given that On the other hand, Edmonds Caltech’s Sherman Fairchild Distinguished Scholar. He $35,000 dollars in the process. Intellectual Ventures had to dish and first place winner Glick both pays a trip to Caltech every year to give lectures on-cam- Three other undergraduates out $51,000 for student ideas that believe that the legal guidance is pus in Beckman and Ramo Auditoriums, and off-campus also won thousands of dollars may or may not be patentable. “I worth a large percentage of the at the Pasadena Convention Center. for their inventions: junior Dan- think they [Intellectual Ventures] royalties. “This is probably the Hawking, 68, was scheduled to give a Jan 21 lecture iel Erenrich won second place were happy with the results... but best chance for undergraduates to at Caltech, but according to his friend and colleague Kip and $10,000 for his new capt- it’s expensive and the economy generate money from their idea,” Thorne, who corresponded with The Tech via email, cha design; senior Tamas Sza- isn’t great,” said Edmonds. said Edmonds, noting that less “[Hawking] contracted a chest infection in December, lay won third place and $5,000 If any of the undergraduate ideas than 1% of all patents generate and on the advice of his doctors he cancelled his January for his multi-touch eye-tracking are marketable, then Intellectual revenue. Edmonds also added visit, though he was well enough to continue going into interface between humans and Ventures’ economic gamble will that Caltech could support start- the office regularly and continue his work.” computers; and junior Cole have paid off. In order to enter ups if undergraduates didn’t suc- There was talk of rescheduling Hawking’s visit to Hershowitz won fourth place the Intellectual Ventures competi- cessfully obtain a patent. March, but Hawking emailed Thorne, telling him that it and $1,000 for his small-scale tion, students agreed to give half Glick has a different take on the was impossible. Hawking wrote, "I hope however that “micro-grid” that could provide of future profits to Caltech and to benefits of legal guidance. “Have you will invite me again next year and this time I will be power more cheaply and effi- give Intellectual Ventures the op- you seen the book of U.S. patent able to come." ciently to the rural developing tion to license before negotiating law? It’s really thick,” he said. Stephen Hawking, is renown throughout the world for world. with any other party. In return, So far, Glick has had to pay his contributions to physics. He focuses on space, time, “We [the competition judges Caltech promised to provide legal more attention to the legal is- black holes, and gravity. Hawking has also published a and organizers] were really im- protection and guidance through sues involved with patents than number of best-seller books about the universe, including pressed,” said Karin Edmonds, the thorny patent application pro- any other winner. Glick’s inven- A Brief History of Time. Caltech’s Director for Technol- cess. Typically, Caltech doesn’t tion was generated in the lab of His many discoveries have been made while under an ogy Transfer and organizer of own an undergraduate invention Weijia Wen from Hong Kong almost full-body paralysis which onset at age 25, caused the Intellectual Ventures com- unless it’s developed on Caltech’s University of Science and Tech- by amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS). petition. “Intellectual Ventures dime. nology (HKUST), but at present, Hawking has composed his Caltech lectures using a appreciated the amazing under- Some students disliked the idea HKUST has ambiguous rights to computer (made for him by Intel), which allows him to graduate presentations... and of sharing future royalties. One Glick’s microrheotronic universal use his cheek muscles to select and string together words, the undergraduates didn’t even undergraduate sent Edmonds an logic gate. Regardless, he plans and speak them for him with an automated voice. He is have a dry run for their presen- email that said, “I don’t think it’s to continue researching his logic expected to continue his lectures at Caltech next year. tations.” fair you’re taking undergraduate gate at HKUST this summer. Caltech’s Technology transfer ideas.” In fact, the second place office also filed provisional pat- winner almost didn’t enter the Please see PATENTABLE IDEAS, Page 6 In This Issue Student-invented Sport Featured News Brief! Caltech and World page 6 Sports Briefs! page 7 in ESPN The Magazine Alice is in Wonderland Again page 5 Beware of Nearby Dentistry! page 2 page 5 2 Ma r c h 8, 2010 Op i n i o n Th e Ca l i f o r n i a Te c h From the Editors Nearby Dentistry: Not to be Trusted

By Tina Ding conceptions to save my teeth a crown procedure, and very like- believe me. In the name of pro- ing the name and location of the Ed i t o r -i n -Ch i e f from eventually being completely ly root canal as well. crastination, she booked a dentist dentistry that tried to screw me replaced by artificial fillings, if I ROOT CANAL? At the time, I over, she recounts a similar story keep going at this three cavities didn’t really know the technicali- consultation with my dentist from my home, to get a second opinion just as ridiculous. Dona went to Caltech offers a dental plan per year rate. ties of root canal, but those two the same Dr. EvilTricks at Green that many students have enrolled Sure enough, flossing made words have been conditioned to on my plight. I drove an hour home to my Street Dental a month ago af- in. Though it is one of the closest my teeth better, and my annual be associated with pain. ter chipping a small piece of her dentistry to our campus, Green number dropped to one cavity. I I left the dentist office feeling dentist last Friday afternoon. He used his dentist utensils and did tooth. Dr. EvilTricks must realize Street Dental, located at 1092 E. was on the way i n c r e d i b l y that doing crowns is the way to Green St (intersection of Green to clean and sad. Sad some examinations on my teeth, before putting them down and earn money, because apparently St and Wilson Ave) is a horrible healthy teeth. that I ap- a chipped tooth needs a crown choice. Be warned that if you go, So imagine p a r e n t l y telling me, “No problems this year, but you grind your teeth at too. He refused to give her resin, you might be advised or pressured my shock didn’t floss which is a simple procedure for into getting a dental crown even if when I went e n o u g h , night and need a mouth guard.” I told him about my previous filling chipped tooth, saying that you definitely don’t need one. to the Green sad that I if he does, the repaired chip will I have a history of having un- Street Dental was born consultation, and asked him five times if he’s sure I’m completely fall off in a month or less. She kind teeth. They like to form cav- two weeks with bad marched over to another dentist ities, and eating candy and fruits ago to get my genes for fine. “not even ONE?” I said al- most hopefully. It was definitely nearby, who happily mended the all the time probably exacerbates annual check- cavity re- chipped tooth with resin (20% the the situation. About seven years up, where s i l i e n c e , strange to go from needing four cavity fillings including a painful cost of the crown) and even gave ago, I’ve been leaving the dentist they told me sad that it her chocolate. Now, almost two office every year with having to that I have was so bad expensive procedure, to none at all. He told me that the tooth the months later, the tooth is perfectly return to get filling for on -aver four cavities, that I need fine. age three cavities. Three was the one of which to undergo other dentist said needs a crown has no cavities forming on the If you’re enrolled in the Caltech annual number for a long time, they claim such pain- dental plan, think twice before until about two years ago, when a b s o l u t e l y ful sound- top, and that as long as my the tooth doesn’t hurt, there’s no need agreeing to undergo more than my dentist told me it helps to needs to have ing proce- ordinary procedures. The Caltech floss. Flossing always seemed a crown re- dure. to get rid of the natural tooth. Of course, if it is a matter of who to Human Resource receives com- like a weird practice to me but I p l a c e m e n t . M y plaints and provides a list of ill- was willing to sacrifice my -pre There is cav- m o t h e r , believe, he who knows and fixed all my teeth is the one to trust. rated dentistry. It may be wise to ity forming who did consult them. between the not want Completely shocked but nev- filling and the to pay the ertheless ecstatic at this new in- top of my teeth $560 for formation, I told my roommate The California Tech near the gum, they said. You need the procedure, did not want to of the good news. After confirm- Caltech 40-58, Pasadena, CA 91125 advertising e-mail: [email protected] editorial e-mail: [email protected]

Editor-in-Chief Tina Ding Letters to the Editor Layout Editor Hanna Liu

Sports Editor Rick Paul Re: “Tales of Caltech” - Humor section, March 1st Issue

Business Manager Gabriel Mendoza To the Editor: Dear Coach and Basketball Team,

Our program is deeply offended by this attempted jab. I wholeheartedly apologize to you and the Caltech bas- Staff ketball team for my "article" in last week's California Tech. Dannah Almasco How is this humorous? Because it’s a pleasure to laugh ZeNan Chang at true student-athletes who are committed to a genu- Please believe me that when writing it, I strongly consid- Deboki Chakravarti ine team environment? Because it’s enjoyable to make ered whether the members of the team would find it funny Daniel Erenrich a mockery of one of the more popular spectator sports or offensive, and ultimately I decided on the former. It Andrew Freddo seems I guessed incorrectly. Yang Hu on campus? Because a group of mostly freshman college Casey Jao athletes weren’t able to win a game against legitimate My piece was not intended as a jab against you or any of Natalya Kostandova competitors? the players or coaches in your program, or your program Rebecca Lawler Shame on the Tech for creating – and printing – some- in general. I picked your team exactly because you are one Sarah Marzen of the most popular teams at the school. And I wrote the Monorina Mukhopadhyay thing that seeks to make a joke about a serious activity Neha Samdaria at OUR university. Shame on the Tech for not doing any article not to make fun of your team, but rather to bring the Gloria Tran research on the program. Shame on the Tech for not real- general atmosphere of losing in Caltech athletics to light, James Wu izing the passion and potential of the basketball squad. with the hope that it will change. Wesley Yu Shame on the Tech for not writing a sensible story on the It is fantastic that so many records were set this season, team all season. and I agree that it is a shame that no serious reporting was done on this. However, individual records do not make it Circulation More than a dozen program records were set this year, Aryan Safaie including team field goal attempts, blocked shots, and op- any easier to be a fan when the team does not win. I wish Edward Chen ponent 3-point percentage. Junior captain Ryan Elmquist that the program were successful, and that the campus made Caltech history with his 50 blocks and 208 free could rally around it. However, until that day comes (and I throw attempts. Freshman Mike Edwards set the all-time believe it will come before this group of freshmen gradu- Advisor ate), humor (or my attempt at it) is both how I cope and Tom Mannion mark for 3-point field goals (62) while leading the SCIAC in points per game (18.8 ppg) and steals (44) for much of how I hope to help change things. I am sorry that I failed the season. Fellow first-years Collin Murphy and Ethan in this case. The Tech is published weekly except dur- Boroson were two of the top players in the league in re- ing vacation and examination periods by bounds, assists, and steals as well. Freshman Alex Run- Regards, the Associated Students of the California E.A. Blair, writer of “Tales of Caltech” Institute of Technology, Inc. The opinions kel produced solid numbers in rebounding and field goal expressed herein are strictly those of the percentage. authors and advertisers. Letters and submissions are welcome; e- The list goes on and on because, while there was not mail submissions to [email protected] as a “1” in the win column, significant strides were made plain-text attachments, including the au- as the men’s basketball team experienced myriad break- thor’s name, by Friday of the week before Corrections publication. The Tech does accept anony- throughs. So, before trying to get a chuckle with some mous contributions. The editors reserve the right to edit and abridge all submissions for words that only epitomize what the current program is any reason. All written work remains prop- NOT, one should proceed with more prudence. The un- Our previous article “Coffeehouse Employees Quit” erty of its author. named the supervisor as John-Michael and a student worker The advertising deadline is 5 PM Friday; supportive and distasteful flavor this so-called humor all advertising should be submitted elec- leaves on one’s literary tongue is no laughing matter. as Sylvia Puglisa. Their correct spellings are Jon-Michael tronically or as camera-ready art, but The and Sylvia Puglisi, respectively. Tech can also do simple typesetting and arrangement. All advertising inquiries should be directed to the business manager at [email protected]. For subscription Dr. Eslinger information, please send mail to “Subscrip- Head Men’s Basketball Coach tions.” Th e Ca l i f o r n i a Te c h Ma r c h 8, 2010 Mi n u t e s 3 ASCIT Board of Directors Meeting – Minutes IHC Meeting - Avery - March 2, 2010 March 3, 2010

Officers Present: Adam Khan, Karthik Sarma, Tim Black, Brian Merlob, Chris Hallacy, Present: Tim Black (chair), DK Lim (Avery), Chris Whelan (Blacker), Addie Rice, Laura Conwill Andrew Price (Dabney), Alex Lapides (Fleming), Lucas Hartsough (Lloyd), Call to order: 4:06 PM Will Steinhardt (Ricketts) Dan Kolodrubetz (Ruddock), Laura Conwill (secretary) Funding Requests: Guests: Chris Hallacy • Multihouse Funding: Ricketts has asked for multihouse funding for a barbeque at Dabney this weekend. Leadership Fund • Blacker Interhouse: Blacker is requesting its Interhouse funding. This will come out DK reports that an alum gave Caltech a lot of money for leadership of next term’s budget. VOTE: Approved (6-0-0) development at Caltech. This money is devoted solely to leadership development; it cannot be re-appropriated. Andrew was hoping this is President’s Report: enough to start a ninth house, Leadership House. Tom Mannion would • Career Development Center: Karthik and Adam are putting together a committee like to do use the money effectively. Now that ASCIT and the IHC are of 2-3 students who are going to interview the candidates for assistant director and turned over, we’re start thinking about what to do. Tom already has a premed advisor. few ideas but would like more input. The IHC is going to continue to • Chile Earthquake Fundraiser: Adam was approached by a student in Blacker brainstorm ideas. who was interested in doing fundraising for the earthquake; he is going to look into fundraising methods. Avery Roof Damage Officer Reports: Damage to 40 roof tiles in Avery was discovered by housing. At first • V.P. of Academic Affairs (ARC Chair): Signups are going up in a couple of days it was thought that this may have been linked to Gangsta Night, but for ARC Secretary and Rep-at-Large. there some people remember seeing the damage before Gangsta Night occurred. Housing will pay for the repairs. • V.P. of Nonacademic Affairs (IHC Chair): The rotation committee is going to give its report to Anneila Sargent on Monday. The PFW Saturday schedule is coming together and is currently up at ihc.caltech.edu/saturday/. There was an issue with Revised Resident Guide to Institute Housing damage to Avery; this has been resolved. The Resident Guide to Institute Housing has been revised. Students are • not allowed to have pets other than cats and seeing eye dogs in their • Treasurer: Karthik gave Hallacy a receipt. Hallacy deposited a lot of checks. rooms. In addition, there will be $100 fines for a lot of violations, such as Everyone wants money. living in common areas or staying after their contract end. Checking in at the beginning of the year will be enforced. • Social Director: Addie has been working on planning PFW and the ASCIT movie.

• Operations Director: Brian is dealing with Big T stuff. He contacted 2007 presidents Prefrosh Weekend from Dabney and Ricketts for information. The 2007 yearbook is 14 paragraphs Prefrosh Weekend planning is coming along. The website that Raymond away from being done (except for Ricketts, which is missing a fair amount of its in Dabney is making should be up on Thursday, and there’s another PFW information). They’ve made good progress with the 2008 yearbook. Brian has not yet meeting on Thursday. The IHC is going to be reviewing Prefrosh Weekend had time to physically hunt down historians. Brian intends to recycle the old Techs in rules soon. the DDR room soon.

Discussion: Will gave Dan a pile of money to pay him back $10, which included 2 • Devteam: A new Devteam needs to be found soon. euros. This is actually money from Ricketts to Ruddock, so Hallacy will • Attire: Hallacy is wearing a Totoro sweatshirt. It’s very flattering. have to deal with it! Hallacy: How the **** am I supposed to count this?

Meeting adjourned: 4:25 PM Submitted by Laura Conwill ASCIT Secretary

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‹%H7KH0DWFK 4 Ma r c h 8, 2010 Fe a t u r e s Th e Ca l i f o r n i a Te c h 13 Questions with Professor Warren Brown interviewed by Sandhya Chandrasekaran

quarters. On off years, I do special top- is about the anthropology of violence itself What is the oddest weapon people ics courses. Like this year, I’m teaching a in the Middle Ages. used back then? course on knighthood right now, and next It’s a version of what’s called a pike, basi- term, I’m teaching Vikings. Sometimes I’ll Why Europe, specifically the Middle cally a very long spear. But the thing about do a course on the medieval church. I’m Ages? pikes is that they didn’t just have the point thinking of working up a course on the cru- It’s probably not what draws everybody. at the end – they had hooks coming out one sades. So, I just keep my ears to the ground, When I went to graduate school in history, side and axes coming out the other. and whenever I sense the students are par- I knew I just wanted to do history; it really ticularly interested in something, I’m like, didn’t matter what kind. Part of me wanted If you were given the opportunity to “Eh, let’s work up a course on that.” to be an American historian; I think colo- time travel to any era, which period of nial America is actually really cool, but time would you choose? It is rumored that you majored in it’s a really crowded field. If you count I would be nervous to go back to the Mid- physics. What prompted your switch to when the Pilgrims first get here in the early dle Ages. It’s interesting because I study Warren Brown is a Professor of History the field of history? 1600s, to now, you’ve got 400 years, and a the rules of the game and the period, and I in the HSS Department at Caltech. My undergraduate background is com- country full of historians, all making their try to figure out how they thought and saw plicated. I started out as a musician. I went careers within these 400 years. The Middle the world, but to actually go back and live How long have you been conducting to the New England Conservatory of Music Ages is big – they go from 500 to 1500. I it, and try to navigate it without offending your research studies? on the French horn, and I was going to be already spoke fluent German, which was a somebody and getting hurt or killed would Since I was in graduate school back in an orchestra player. But once I got there, I big help, but I also wanted to learn Latin – be quite difficult. If I were to go back to the 1993. I was a graduate student at UCLA, was appalled by how narrow-minded many it was just something I’d always wanted to Roman period, I would probably be sold where I got my Ph.D., but I started here in of my colleagues were. I remember the day do. So, then, I thought about being an an- into slavery, because look at me: I’m tall, the summer of 1997. that the space shuttle launched for the first cient historian. But the classics department I’m fair, I’ve got dark hair – I’m obviously time, and I was really excited because I at the University of Cincinnati wouldn’t let a barbarian. So I wouldn’t be terribly safe Why Caltech? had always been into the space program me in because I didn’t already have Latin, going there as well. If I were to go back to A job. [chuckles] I came out of UCLA and science. But I mentioned it to some- and the medievalists would let me learn any time period in history, I think the 1930s right when Caltech was looking for a me- body, and they looked at me like they had Latin as I was going along. So, totally pro- would be really interesting, because it’s far dievalist. And I was trained in a somewhat no idea what I was talking about. It turned saic. [chuckles] enough back that it’s a period of history unusual way; it is heavily influenced by out that the New England Conservatory that I’m interested in, but it’s close enough anthropology. I am interested in names, was just starting a double-degree program If you had to be a person from the that I think that I could still navigate it, and and dates, and places, and things, but I’m with Tufts University. I had been exposed Middle Ages, who would you be? more or less understand the rules. also really interested in understanding how to science as a kid because my stepfather Let’s face it, my hands are white, they’re society works, the rules that it plays by, is a physicist, so I decided to give it a try. soft, I’ve never done a lick of manual labor Are there any last myths about the and the way that it sees the world, which That’s how I ended up with two undergrad- in my life, and I’m very pale, which means Middle Ages that you’d like to debunk? is kind of anthropological way of look- uate degrees, one in music performance I would probably be instantly identified Where do I start? There’s more and more ing at things. And the humanities group at and one in physics. as a member of the aristocracy, probably evidence that the term “Dark Ages” doesn’t Caltech was actually looking for somebody as a monk. A monastery meant something apply. The Dark Ages traditionally applies who thought that way. Have you played for the orchestra different back then than it does now: it’s to that period from 500, when Rome ended, here? not only a religious center but it’s a center until about the 12th century, the high Mid- Is it a different experience teaching a No, because I’ve got children (...) But for education and learning, and kings often dle Ages, and anything in between is kind history class at a university that special- we’re about to kick two of them out the come to abbots for advice. And because of thought of as barbarian. It is commonly izes in math, science, and engineering? door to college, so maybe some time will I can read and write, and I’m educated, a believed that n https://mail.google.com/ma I really enjoy it. Kids at more traditional open up. [chuckles] monastery would probably be a good place il/?ui=2&ik=e61317eb7f&view=att&th=1 universities often come in with a lot of pre- to be. 273c5b6e413d89b&attid=0.1&disp=inline conceptions or ideas about history. Caltech What does your current research en- &realattid=f_g6iv3fx00&zw obody could students often aren’t as concerned about it, tail? Have you ever fenced before? read or write except for a few monks in so they come into my classes refreshingly I started out in what are called conflict I fenced in college, believe it or not. I their monasteries, there wasn’t any trade, free of preconceptions. So it’s really a de- studies, the theory being that how people was on what passed for the team at Tufts at people were just farming locally, there was light. And I’ve been here now, gosh, going settle disputes tells us an awful lot about the time. I think my first year on the team lots of disease, and everyone was down- on thirteen years, and I’m not sure I’d be how their society is organized. So I stud- I had the singular honor of being the only right miserable. Well, historians have been happy anywhere else, to tell you the truth. ied dispute resolution and conflict as a way member on the Tufts fencing team to defeat not only rethinking the period, but there’s of understanding the political world of the a member of the Harvard Junior Varsity, been a lot of work done with archaeology. What courses do you teach? early Middle Ages; in particular, I worked which says a lot about our team [chuckles]. New books are appearing that show that I teach a frosh hum, Hum3a, which is before the year 1000. So my research basi- No, I enjoyed that. Fencing is a quite spe- period was a civilization in its own right, the classical and medieval part of the Eu- cally deals with understanding how society cific kind of sword fighting. The weapon is that was thriving; although it was not as ropean history group. Every other year, I is put together, how power flowed, how sort of light, you’re not wearing any armor wealthy as medieval Europe was later on, teach a survey of medieval history for two much kings mattered -- that sort of thing. and it’s as much of a mental chess match as it was far from a dark period. It actually And then I went on from there. My second it is anything else. had quite a lively culture.

Patenting everything from CAPTCHAs to logic gates 1st place, Casey Glick: 2nd place, Daniel Erenrich: 3rd place, Tamas Szalay: 4th place, J. Cole MicroRheotonic universal Client-side video CAPTCHA Multi-touch and eye tracking Hershokowitz: logic gate using invertible transforms for human interfacing Smart microgrid technology

Currently, there are no computation- We’ve all run across a Captcha before, “The area of human-computer interfaces Hershowitz’s project may not have won based microfluidics devices, but Glick even if we didn’t know that it was a Capt- has seen little advancement over the past first place in the competition, but it holds wants to change that by developing a uni- cha: when you try to enter a secure site, two decades. The keyboard and mouse re- a special place in the judges’ hearts. Ac- versal microfluidic logic gate. the computer asks you to read a weirdly main ubiquitous, with single-finger touch- cording to Edmonds, the judges designed However, according to Glick, the current stretched word. pads being the only major addition. Steadi- the fourth place award because they were industry standard would require external Captchas are designed to separate com- ly increasing computer interaction surface touched by the humanitarianism of Her- computers, which are bulky compared to puters from humans, so that computers area renders mice and touchpads more dif- showitz’s project, but the judges weren’t the sub-millimeter microfluidics devices, can’t secure sites. However, current Capt- ficult to use, and the growth in time spent sure that the idea was marketable or scal- in order to have a clear input/output sig- chas only keep out computers roughly working with computers makes the ergo- able. nal. a fifth of the time, said Erenrich, which nomics of such devices critical – it is clear Rural areas in developing countries need By using an electrorheologic fluid -in means that computers can just enter secure that an alternative is needed. The proposed cheap, reliable electricity, but these towns stead of water or oil allowed Glick to make sites after roughly five sites. system combines the best of two potential are often too far away from the nearest and control input and output signals using To fix this problem, security companies interface methods, eye tracking and multi- power grid to receive cheap electricity. electrical signals and bubbles in the micro- are looking to incorporate as much infor- touch, while circumventing the flaws of After interning at a smart grid lobbying fluidics chamber. mation as possible into as little bandwidth each. The idea is simple: use eye tracking organization and working with friends to By the end of his summer SURF in Hong as possible to make it more difficult for to center a small multi-touch interface on build a PV manufacturing plant in Ban- Kong, Glick had tested NOT, AND, and computers to pass as humans. Inspired by the region of interest....” gladesh, Hershowitz combined the two OR microfluidic logic gates. This summer, a discussion of fast Fourier transforms in experiences and asked himself, “What can he plans to experimentally test his design Blacker’s Purgatory, Erenrich developed a -- Abstract from Szalay’s Intellectual smart grids do for the developing world’s for a logic gate that integrates all three in- different kind of video Captcha that would Ventures paper power problems?” The result: a local dividual logic operations. show users a word embedded in a movie “plug and play” network that combines the When his graduate student mentor was of noise. economical “smart grid”, which reallocates completely unsure of how to integrate the Erenrich is not optimistic. “Security power more efficiently in real time, with three individual logic gates, Glick realized friends of mine say that it’s amusing but the “micro-grid”, which uses local power how innovative his ideas were. not especially useful.” generators. The California Tech Fe a t u r e s Ma r c h 8, 2010 5 Alice Returns to Wonderland by ZeNan Chang ( 3.5/5 stars )

lice in Wonderland,” the sixth partnership between actor Johnny card-shaped soldiers of the Red Queen, we can catch hints that we are Depp and director Tim Burton, is as quirky as expected, and with observing a child at play. We see the cards tumble in domino fashion and “A the help of technology, is easily the most visually stunning of the even catch a glimpse of an attempted house of cards toppling over, some- twenty or so film adaptations of Lewis Carroll’s “Alice’s Adventures thing many of us may have experienced in our childhood days. in Wonderland.” The phrase “mad as a hatter” ap- However, Tim Burton’s ad- parently comes from a time when aptation is not simply a retell- hat makers inhaled mercury fumes ing of the original storyline. in their trade. In “Alice in Wonder- Nor is it a remake of the 1951 land,” the resultant mercurial mad- Disney cartoon. This movie, ness manifests outwardly in an al- also from Disney, is set thir- most unrecognizable Johnny Depp. teen years later and features a Bright orange frizzled hair, wide nineteen year old Alice (Mia emerald eyes, and heavy makeup Wasikowska) who lives by mark Depp’s visage as the theatri- the mantra, “the only way to cal Mad Hatter. Depp takes on the achieve the impossible is to Hatter with the same zest moviego- believe it is possible.” ers now expect from him. However, Once again following the amid all of Depp’s theatrics, he also White Rabbit (Martin Sheen) finds a very human side of the Hat- down the rabbit hole, Alice ter in flirting moments where the returns to Wonderland to find Hatter becomes aware of his grow- herself long awaited by the ing insanity. familiar characters of Wonder- As in many silver screen adap- land. The Mad Hatter (Depp), tations of Lewis Carroll’s “Alice’s Absolem the Caterpillar (Alan Adventures in Wonderland,” many Rickman), Tweedledee and Photo from shockya.com prominent characters in Tim Bur- Tweedledum (Matt Lucas), ton’s version are borrowed from and the enigmatic Cheshire (Stephen Fry) all refer to her as “the Lewis Carrol’s sequel, “Through the Looking-Glass, and What Alice Alice” and have been waiting for her return. In Narnian fashion, she Found There.” The Red Queen is a mishmash of the Queen of Hearts is foretold to be their champion and must represent the White Queen\ from the first book and the Red Queen from the chess-themed sequel. Sorceress (Anne Hathaway) in battle. In a now standard climax scene The Jabberwocky is a character in a nonsensical poem from the second where the forces of good and evil come face to face, Alice must slay of Lewis Carroll’s books. The comedic Tweedledee and Tweedledum are the unstoppable Jabberwocky to end the reign of terror under the Red also characters taken from the sequel. Queen, who is played with a toddler-like relish by Helena Bonham As for purported unfulfilled romantic tension between Alice and the Carter. Mad Hatter? Sure love is there, of the friendship sort. And Burton does Amid all the epic heroism introduced into this story, Burton still linger on scenes featuring the two. But as for romance, I think not. Then finds time to remind us how ridiculous everything actually appears. again, perhaps that is just a result of me not believing it possible. In the final battle between the chess-shaped white forces and the

Students Invent the Sport “Torkball” Featured in ESPN The Magazine by Deboki Chakravarti

altech’s appearances in sports magazine feet that allow them to move in any direction. have typically been limited to articles that However, when a player takes possession of the C attempt clever puns about rocket science and ball, their jetpack is disabled until they pass the quantum mechanics before delving into our less- ball to another player. The game is comprised than-stellar athletic record. But the December of matches, which are made up of rounds. The 14th, 2009, issue of ESPN The Magazine in- rounds are the five-minute periods in which cluded Caltech in a different context thanks to players try to move the ball around The Halo. the inclusion of an idea suggested by a group of Winning a match requires winning three rounds, undergraduates in a feature that detailed poten- and whichever team wins two matches first has tial sports of the future. won the game. The students, mistakenly labeled by the maga- The decision to participate in this feature zine as “Physics majors at Caltech” , which only came after an email sent to the Caltech direc- holds true for two of the students involved, in- tory mentioned that ESPN was looking for ideas cluded Brett Kassof, Benji Lin, Alan Pezeshki, for a feature on sports of the future. The group and Kirit Karkare, as well as Dvin Adalian, Chris did most of the thinking during the summer of Dempsey, and Iliya Zilbert, who have graduated 2008, but as Benji Lin notes, one of the biggest since starting this project. Their submission was challenges was “being patient”. “The project featured alongside suggestions by Seth McFar- was on and then off and then pushed back, etc. lane, comic book writer Matt Fraction, creator That’s why it took so long,” he said. of the show Slamball Mason Gordon, creator of There are several points of inspiration for Aqua Teen Hunger Force and Squidbillies David the sport that the group drew on. Aspects of Willis, the director McG, and the development ultimate Frisbee, football, and tetherball were team for Halo 3. The feature includes an illus- included in the rules, as can be seen in the re- tration of the sport and an outline that describes quirement that the player release the ball after the objective of the game, as well as detailing having taking possession of it, the contact, and the players, equipment, rules, and field of play. the winding of the ball around the field. They The sport the group created is called Torkball; also took into account the possibility of cheap it takes place in a donut-shaped playing field space travel in the future, positing the construc- that orbits the earth called The Halo. There are tion of a sports arena in space as a hypothetical two teams of five present in The Halo. Both outcome of reducing the cost of sending people tryto move a ball as far from the starting line and things into space. For anyone interested in as possible in five minutes, but in opposing di- seeing the feature, there is a copy in the Rud- rections. The field is zero gravity, and players dock House Library. wear air-powered jetpacks on their hands and Illustration the stadium view of the Torkball, a sport invented by a group of Caltech students 6 The California Tech Ne w s Ma r c h 8, 2010 News Briefs Steampunk OPI futures.com in which he discusses modern technology Caltech and alumni associations. Check out/Contact: alumni- Board Game Library in SAC opened futures.com

The board game club opened its library of Off campus BOD Election games to the Caltech community last week. The collection includes over 20 games and expan- Vanessa Burns is running unopposed for Off-Cam- sions and cost over six-hundred dollars. Fund- pus Board of Control Representatives(BOC). ing was provided by the Moore-Hufstedler Fund. The library is currently located in SAC 5B Southern Food Special at Coffeehouse which is on the west side of the SAC. The MHF proposal was first conceived of to Thursday 3/11, 10pm – 2am, Tom Mannion will be purchase "Space Hulk" a game too expensive for cooking with Fred and Julie Heltsley.the menu will one person to reasonably purchase. Other games include Tom’s Pulled Pork sandwich with award win- in the collection are "Dominion", "Battle Star ning barbecue sauce and coleslaw, while the Heltsleys Galactica", "Pandemic", "Power Grid", "Race will be cooking traditional southern breakfast. for the Galaxy" and many others. The collection represents 9 of the top 30 board games, accord- ing to boardgamegeek.com. World/Nation While many houses and individuals do have OCARS 2010 WINNERS their own personal collections, the board game A huge clock, built as part of the construction for OPI, Ruddock club hopes to provide universal access to board Interhouse, turns at the party last Saturday games to all Caltech students. Students inter- Best Picture: The Hurt Locker ested in joining the club should contact the club president Gerry Salinas at gsalinas@caltech. Best Actor: Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart edu. The club hopes to have more members and Music Groups prised of a Men’s Glee Club and plans to Best Actress: Sandra Bullock Women’s Glee Club, which meets seek funding from ASCIT to further expand Perform at separately and combines for prac- its board game offerings. Best Art Direction: Avatar Festival tices once a week and for public -Daniel Enrenrich performances. This year marks Best Directing: The Hurt Locker, Kathyrn Bigelow MUSIC FESTIVALS, the 105th season of the Men’s Alumni Director Leaves From Page 1 Glee Club. The Women’s Glee Shamu Kills Trainer Club is the oldest organization for Andy Shaindlin, Executive director of the Currently, the choir practices in women on campus. Both groups Caltech Alumni Association is leaving Caltech An experienced Seaworld animal trainer was killed the basement of Beckman audi- play important roles in extracur- after ten years of service to the institution. He by a whale during Dining with Shamu, a performance torium on Mondays and Wednes- ricular life at Caltech. Member- has worked with Caltech undergraduates on and dinner feature of Seaworld. According to wit- days. The choir also performed ship is open to anyone in the House Reunions, Big Interhouse, and alumni nesses, the whale grabbed the trainer with its mouth on Parent Day earlier this term. Caltech/JPL community wishing holiday tours. Shaindlin also has a blog: alumni- and swam rapidly around the tank, tossing her around. The Caltech Glee Club is com- to sing. The trainer was fatally injured.

HELP US HELP CHILE! “Chile ayuda a Chile” On Saturday February 27th 2010, a devastating 8.8 magnitude earthquake followed by a tsu- nami struck south and central Chile. This earthquake was one of the most powerful events reg- istered in world history, and it destroyed several cities across the country. More than 800 people were killed and over 2 million are struggling with a lack of food, basic services, and above all housing, according to government estimates. The number of affected people corresponds to nearly 12% of the total population in Chile. The country’s infrastructure and basic services (highways, hospitals, water and electric utilities) have been severely damaged or destroyed. Preliminary estimates indicate that the total damage caused by this catastrophe could be up to 30 billion dollars, or nearly 18% of the country’s 2009 GDP. From Monday March 8th to Friday March 12th, the Chilean community at Caltech in a joint effort with the Caltech-Y and CLASES are organizing a fund-raising to support the Chilean relief initiative “Chile Ayuda a Chile” (Chile helps Chile).

What is this initiative? To overcome the emergency and help the earthquake and tsunami victims, as well as to help in the reconstruction of the country, a national telethon was organized by the Chilean govern- ment and several Chilean-based relief organizations. Since Chile is a very long country, when a natural disaster occurs it strikes only a portion of its territory, and this initiative comes alive to coordinate aid from within the country, sponsored and supervised by the Chilean Government. The “Chile Ayuda a Chile” telethon took place Friday March 5th and Saturday March 6th, and it raised an estimated of 60 million dollars. This sum is just a small fraction of the total damages caused by the earthquake, and donations are still being received by the “Chile Ayuda a Chile” organization in the following weeks.

What is the Caltech Community doing? At the sight of this tragedy we can’t be absent, so throughout this week (03/08 – 03/12) vol- unteers from the Caltech-Y, CLASES, and the Chilean community at Caltech, will be collecting donations every day from 11 am to 2 pm at the Chandler - Red Door area. We will also be giving general information on how to support this cause and other Chilean-based relief organizations.

What are the organizations receiving the funds? The funds are being collected in a centralized way and will be distributed among a number of well-known Chilean based charity organizations: - Fundacion Teleton

- Hogar de Cristo

- Un Techo para Chile

- Fundacion para la Superacion de la Pobreza

- Caritas Chile

The money raised will be used to build temporary housing and provide emergency relief (food and health care) for the affected families. The aid will be distributed among the different organi- zations taking into account the most urgent necessities as determined by the government. By donating directly to these Chilean-based organizations, our impact can be larger as re- sources can be distributed in a more effective way. Come to the Chandler-Red Door area during this week to make your donation and get more information about the charities and organizations involved in this effort. The California Tech Sp o r t s Ma r c h 8, 2010 7 Standings SCIAC Men’s Baseball Standings Conference Overall Steampunk OPI Record Win % Record Win % Pomona- 9-0 1.000 10-4 0.714 Pitzer The Weekly Redlands 10-2 0.833 12-2 0.857 CMS 5-4 0.556 8-7 0.533 Cal 4-5 0.444 9-7 0.562 Lutheran Scoreboard Occidental 4-5 0.444 7-9 0.438 La Verne 4-5 0.444 6-8 0.429 Whittier 1-6 0.143 2-12 0.143 March 1, 2010 Caltech 0-10 0.000 0-11 0.000 Women’s Water Polo vs. Gannon (PA) L 3-17 SCIAC Men’s Tennis Standings Conference Overall March 5, 2010 Record Win % Record Win % Baseball vs. Whittier L 3-20 Cal 3-0 1.000 6-0 1.000 Lutheran CMS 3-0 1.000 5-2 0.714 March 7, 2010 Pomona- 2-1 0.667 4-1 0.800 Baseball vs. Whitter L 2-24 Pitzer Redlands 2-1 0.667 5-3 0.625 Baseball vs. Whittier L 3-26 Occidental 1-3 0.250 4-3 0.571 Whittier 1-3 0.250 4-4 0.500 Caltech 0-4 0.000 3-4 0.429

SCIAC Women’s Tennis Standings Conference Overall Record Win % Record Win % CMS 3-0 1.000 4-0 1.000 Pomona- 3-0 1.000 3-0 1.000 Sports Briefs Pitzer Cal 3-0 1.000 5-1 0.833 Lutheran Caltech Fencing Squad Set to Compete at Redlands 3-0 1.000 3-1 0.750 UCSD for NCAA Regionals Occidental 1-3 0.250 2-4 0.333 Caltech Fencing coaches Michael D’Asaro and Carla Corbit are preparing their team for a trip to the Whittier 0-3 0.000 3-5 0.375 NCAA Western Regional Fencing tournament at UCSD on Saturday, March 13. At stake is a trip to the National tournament held at Harvard University in Cambridge, MA. The Beavers will be up against stiff Caltech 0-3 0.000 1-3 0.250 competition as they face off against perennial powerhouses like Air Force, Stanford, and UCSD. La Verne 0-4 0.000 1-5 0.167 Caltech Women’s Tennis Defeats La Sierra After Three Game Losing Streak 1. Stephanie Kwan (CIT) def. Ariana Ruiz (LSU) 6-2 ,6-2 2. Leslie Tong (CIT) def. Loreal Dugue (LSU) 6-1, 6-1 3. Wubing Ye (CIT) def. Denise Marquez (LSU) 6-2, 6-2 4. Seorim Song (CIT) def. Grace Ann Aragon (LSU) 6-1, 6-0 5. Prakriti Gaba (CIT) def. Rachel Data (LSU) 6-0, 6-0 Caltech 5, La Sierra 0 Senior Lisa Yee Wins the 2009-10 Baldwin Award The Caltech Women’s basketball team announced, last Wednesday, that senior Lisa Yee was chosen as the recipient of the Ed Baldwin Memorial Award for 2010. The Baldwin award is given annually to a SCIAC senior who demonstrates superior sportsmanship and contribution to the league over the course of her career. During her four years at Caltech, Yee has been part of all six conference wins. She is one of only three Caltech players to receive conference recognition, the last being Lindsay King, Caltech’s all time leading scorer, in the 2007-08 season. This season she has averaged 9.4 points per game and 11.1 rebounds rebounds per game. She finished her career as Caltech’s leading rebounder, averaging just shy of a double double. Highlights from the Rossi Relays at CMS (March 1, 2010) MEN 100m: Frosh, Brice Nzeukou finished in 5th place with a time of 11.61 Sophomore, Kyle Martin took 7th with a time of 11.68 HIGH JUMP: Junior, Alex Lapides tied for 2nd a jump of 6’0”, which was 1st place SCIAC competitors JAVELIN: Senior, Tom Rose moved up one spot on the Caltech All-Time Top 10 List in with a lifetime best of 133’ - 5” placing him in 18th place on the day WOMEN 3000m: Sophomore, Sylvia Sullivan ran a lifetime PR of 11:26.78 and moved up to the #3 spot on the Caltech All-Time Top 10 List. HIGH JUMP: Sophomore, Jessica Swallow tied for 4th place in the HJ and tied her lifetime PR with 4’- 9 3/4”. She also finished 13th inTJ with a jump of 31’ 1 3/4”

Women’s Water Polo Kicks Off Season The Caltech women’s water polo team kicked off their season last Monday against NCAA Division II opponent Gannon University (Erie, Pennsylvania). Caltech swam hard and moved the ball well, and their hard work paid off in the form of three goals. Freshman Hannah Dodd led the Beavers with a goal and two assists on the night. Erin Hoops and Chau Liu also contributed to the effort with one goal each. Despite goalie Panna Felsen’s best efforts, Gannon succeeded in getting the ball into the goal seventeen times. In last year’s contest, Caltech was unable to score against Gannon, so despite the disappointing outcome of Monday’s season opener, the team did show some signs of improvement on opening night. 8 The California Tech Hu mo r Ma r c h 8, 2010 Tales of Caltech by E.A. Blair Flems’ Red Robes Leave Some Wondering If Graduating Even Worth It PASADENA, CA -- On what should be one of the happiest days of any student’s life, a dark cloud of red is smothering some Caltech seniors. Fleming House seniors’ tradition of graduating in red robes has left some seniors wondering if they will graduate at all. “I just don’t know if it’s really even worth it at this point,” said a Darb senior when asked about graduating. “I mean, knowing those Flems will be there in those robes kinda has me thinking I should just stick around for another year or two to see if the tradition dies out. There are always some more classes I could take.” Of course this has not been the first report of this controversy. Several opinion pieces have appeared in this publication, and a recent undergraduate email thread quickly ignited into a flame-war, causing the already-sensitive fire alarms in the South Houses to go off at least three times. But one of the largest concerns for many undergraduates is the threat of escalation. “If the Flems are graduating in red, then soon the Moles will be graduating in their house color, and then before you know it, we have a circus graduation on our hands,” expressed a concerned Lloydie. “And after four years of mannerly and refined living, that would be horrible.” “After all,” she added, “this is Caltech.”

Around Campus MEAD LAB -- A local freshman recently informed his Chem 3A TA that the glass wool used for insulating reactions was “the worst cotton candy he’s ever had.” The TA, simultaneously dealing with students cleaning salt plate with water, running reactions outside their hoods, and spilling volatile compounds on the floor, did not find the statement as amusing as the freshman would have hoped.

BROAD CENTER -- The name of a student’s freshman-year adviser was recently discovered in a course textbook, sources report. The discovery, which occurred during class lecture, was well received by neighboring students as being more interesting than lecture anyway.

Weekly Horoscope (Mar 21 - Apr 19) Aries

Check your big answer, we suspect a sign error. No really, check again.

(Apr 20 - May 20) Taurus

You may soon discover your entire ‘new’ research is in a Soviet archive.

(May 21 - June 20) Gemini

One of your instruments will be uncalibrated. Please redo your measurements.

(June 21 - July 22) Cancer

Find a way of entering your advisor’s office; they may have forgotten you.

(July 23 - Aug 22) Leo

You may soon realize you are not actually on the tenure track.

(Aug 23 - Sept 22) Virgo

Perhaps, if you had not gone into science, you would still not be a virgin.

(Sept 23 - Oct 22) Libra

Expect to see your research on Nature’s cover, without your name on it.

(Oct 23 - Nov 21) Scorpio xkcd by Randall Munroe Spend your money wisely-- your grant is about to run out. The California Tech Caltech 40-58 (Nov 22 - Dec 21) Sagittarius Pasadena, CA 91125

Backing up often, because your hard drive is about to fail.

(Dec 22 - Jan 19) Capricorn

This week you will discover they are not all fine houses, and you are in the only bad one.

(Jan 20 - Feb 18) Aquarius

You will soon need to decide: dirty boxers or commando.

(Feb 19 - Mar 20) Pisces

Bring a book to your observations: cloudy skies are on the horizon.