Thesis Rests with Its Author
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University of Bath PHD Bridging incommensurable paradigms: a training consultant recovering the wholeness of being human Treseder, Jill Award date: 1995 Awarding institution: University of Bath Link to publication Alternative formats If you require this document in an alternative format, please contact: [email protected] General rights Copyright and moral rights for the publications made accessible in the public portal are retained by the authors and/or other copyright owners and it is a condition of accessing publications that users recognise and abide by the legal requirements associated with these rights. • Users may download and print one copy of any publication from the public portal for the purpose of private study or research. • You may not further distribute the material or use it for any profit-making activity or commercial gain • You may freely distribute the URL identifying the publication in the public portal ? Take down policy If you believe that this document breaches copyright please contact us providing details, and we will remove access to the work immediately and investigate your claim. Download date: 11. Oct. 2021 BRIDGING INCOMMENSURABLE PARADIGMS: A TRAINING CONSULTANT RECOVERING THE WHOLENESS OF BEING HUMAN Submitted by Jill Treseder for the degree of PhD of the University of Bath 1995 COPYRIGHT Attention is drawn to the fact that copyright of this thesis rests with its author. This copy of the thesis has been supplied on condition that anyone who consults it is understood to recognise that its copyright rests with its author and that no quotation from the thesis and no information derived from it may be published without the prior written consent of the author. This thesis may be made available for consultation within the University Library and may be photocopied or lent to other libraries for the purposes of consultation. 1 UMI Number: U082772 All rights reserved INFORMATION TO ALL USERS The quality of this reproduction is dependent upon the quality of the copy submitted. In the unlikely event that the author did not send a complete manuscript and there are missing pages, these will be noted. Also, if material had to be removed, a note will indicate the deletion. Dissertation Publishing UMI U082772 Published by ProQuest LLC 2013. Copyright in the Dissertation held by the Author. Microform Edition © ProQuest LLC. All rights reserved. This work is protected against unauthorized copying under Title 17, United States Code. ProQuest LLC 789 East Eisenhower Parkway P.O. Box 1346 Ann Arbor, Ml 48106-1346 Abstract The thesis charts my development as a facilitator of personal development groups mostly in commercial settings. My initial focus was at the interpersonal level of learning to develop the confidence to respond faster and more creatively to challenging situations in groups. This extended into a concern about the dilemma of students who welcomed an approach that valued feelings and open behaviours, and took them back into their organisations, only to encounter resistance from cultures which were both task oriented and closed, and hostile to such changes. A central part of the thesis, and of the whole experience, has been uncovering, accepting, exploring, and articulating my own ways of knowing or making sense of experience which are deeply rooted in the preverbal, kinaesthetic, and imaginal modes of being. Not only were they difficult to articulate, but they seemed inadmissible because socialisation and education had taught me at best not to value them, at worst to be ashamed of them. Acknowledging these sources of wisdom was releasing, and led to the emerging sense of a spiritual journey. Methods I have used include dialogues with other facilitators and students of courses; journalling which has been of major importance; attention to, and analysis of, personal processes of knowing and development. The thesis represents a number of different voices, both mine and others'; inner and outer; expressing intuitive knowing, intellectual understanding, and practical experience. To outline the contents: Section 1 Introduction Section 2 Why? (Chapters 3 and 4) examines my reasons for doing research, considers the question “what is thinking?”, and introduces the theme of spiritual development. It also includes two key literature reviews. Section 3 How? (Chapters 5 to 8) addresses epistemology (including female ways of knowing), methodology, and validity. Section 4 What? (Chapters 9 to 15) represents the content proper, including my early experience of facilitating groups; the nature and function of transitions in my work; and explorations of my relationship with men; of personal progress and methods in becoming more emotionally competent; of personal presence; of feminist writing and the complexity of patriarchal oppression; and of energy, sound, and voice. Section 5 Conclusion Abstract 2 Table of Contents Title 1 Abstract 2 Contents 3 Section 1 Introductory Chapter 1 Preface — roots in childhood 5 Chapter 2 Introduction 8 Section 2 Why? Chapter 3 Why Research? — making a difference 20 Review 1 Wisdom and the Goddess 32 Review 2 John Heron's Theory of Personhood 37 Chapter 4 Re-enchantment — taking myself seriously 47 Section 3 How? Chapter 5 Ways of Knowing — an exploration of epistemology 61 Chapter 6 The Magic of Menstruation — dragons, blood, fire, and water 83 Chapter 7 Methodology and Methods 100 Chapter 8 Issues of Validity — an exploration 119 Section 4 What? Chapter 9 Early Insecurity — shadows of my former self 138 Chapter 10 Transitional Space — the crack between the worlds 159 Chapter 11 Champion of the Men — which side of the fence? 165 Chapter 12 Emotional Competence —■ owning the feeling dimension 187 Chapter 13 Personal Presence — staying centred in the midst of conditions 215 Chapter 14 Men and Women Communicating 245 Chapter 15 Making a Song and Dance — energy, sound, and movement 277 Section 5 In Conclusion Chapter 16 So What? 308 Bibliography 321 Contents 3 Section 1 Introductory Section 1 Introductory 4 Chapter 1 Preface — roots in childhood It is hard to say when a piece of research begins, just as it hard to pinpoint the beginning or the ending of a relationship with another person.. In conversation we tend to refer to beginnings and endings as events, whereas we know, through lived experience, that they are processes. I find that the length of such processes stretches with my increasing retrospective perspective, as I see the beginning seeds further and further back in the sequence of “events”. Sometimes I wonder if I am imagining those early seeds, and it is rare to get the sort of corroboration that I found in the summer of 1993, for the belief that I had been moving towards this thesis for a large part of my life. What I found was the first piece of recorded evidence, which showed me that this research did not begin in 1987 in a car park in Bath, but on a windswept headland in West Wales in January 1958. This unusual piece of data consists of some pages which came to light when I was searching through old letters. A journal entry describes the discovery: I found an important and extraordinary document today. It’s impact is only just filtering through 12 hours later. I woke up quite early to sun and blue sky and got straight up and cleaned my bedroom windows and washed all the crystals and hung them back up to make rainbows in the sunlight. Then I cleaned the whole room ... Then I came across it. 2 folded pages A5 size covered in blue ink handwriting. It’s a message from me aged 13 to the adult me, very carefully dated almost like a will... Very solemn and serious and guarding against the probability?/possibHity that as an adult I will have forgotten the “other world”, reminding me to stay true to it, come what may. Describing the feelings. _________ Journal 13th August 1993 The pages are headed “Lovely feelings belonging to the other world". Some of the feelings my thirteen year old self describes are: “the feeling of being thirsty and wanting a lost drink. Lost because you are too old." “the feeling in your bottom tummy when you watch the sea very rough and grey. ” “the feeling something has happened in exactly the same way in the same place and in the same circumstances, somewhen before.” “the feeling of going back” “the feeling of infinite joy, subdued sweet grief of going back” Preface Chapter 1 5 My young self clearly thought that the adult me would need some explanation of the concept of “going back”. Two passages in square brackets attempt to describe it: [You go back as far as you can go back now, when you experience all these feelings. Sometimes perhaps you go right back when alone in a special moment. But you must not be disturbed suddenly or you have lost it forever. [Perhaps you get a glimpse of what you vaguely remember happened in childhood i.e. the “other world" when grown up, when you smell a fresh rose, the first one. You try to remember but it would elude you apart from a feeling.] Letter to myself January 1958 The notion of “going back” seems key to the question of why I wrote these two pages. It seems that I had identified something I judged infinitely precious at a time when it seemed to be under threat. The threat I think was two-fold. Partly it was under threat from the adults in my life and their (adult) way of seeing the world, especially in the public school regime I had recently entered. Partly I could see myself standing on a threshold, not so much aware of a door opening ahead of me, but of the door of childhood closing irrevocably behind me.