256—259 Marriage in the Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana

Indian J. Psychit. (1990), 32(3), 256—259 MARRIAGE IN THE KAMA SUTRA OF VATSYAYANA (with notes on the ancient and modern hindu forms) O. SOMASUNDARAM1 SUMMARY The varieties of marriage described by Manu and accepted by Vatsyayana are mentioned. The qualities of the bride and bridegroom for an ideal marriage are enumerated by Vatsyayana. The Shastraic view of the same along with the valid conditions of a Hindu Marriage under the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955 are contrasted. The role of the virtuous wife in house-keeping and looking after the husband, according to Vatsyayana, is highlighted. A brief mention is made of adultery and prostitution in various times in India. It is concluded that Vatsyayana's view on marital harmony could be utilised even to-day by various therapists. In an earlier paper, the author (Somas- the four varieties of marriage (Venkata- sundaram, 1986) gave particulars about subba Rao, 1975) : the great Indian work on sexuality by the 1. Brahma : In this the father of Sage Vatsyayana and dealt with the the bride invites the bridegroom and sexual aspects of marriages; he has also makes a gifts of his daughter, thereby written about the medico-legal aspects putting an end to his dominion over her: of marriage and divorce coming under and the marriage rites are performed the purview of the Hindu Marriage Act, before the sacred fire. This form is meant 1955 (Somasundaram, 1970). This act for all castes. The other three forms, had been amended in 1976 and a few Daiva, Prajapatya and Arsha are slight important changes have been incorpora variations from this form. ted into it. The other four forms of marriage, It should be remembered that the though not approved by Manu, were ex Kama Sutra is not merely a handbook tant in India and also mentioned by intended for the guidance of the newly Vatsyayana : weds but also deals with the various as 1. Rakshasa : The forcible abduc pects of marital life and problems likely tion of the bride from her paternal home to arise in the course of one. It must is the essence of this form. Classical also be borne in mind that the Hindu examples are Krishna's marriage to law giver, Manu and some of his more Rukmini and Arjuna's marriage to famous commentators like Yagnavalkya Subhadra. have preceded Vatsyayana who has devia 2. Paisacha : In this the man ted from them in some ways. It should seduces the woman when she is asleep or be worthwhile to consider the aspects of intoxicated or unconscious. marriage in the three periods, namely, 3. Asura : In this the father of the those of Manu, Vatsyayana and India of bride sells her to the bridegroom for a today. price. Vatsyayana agrees with Manu regarding 4. Gandharva : In this the bride 1. Consultant Psychiatrist, Thanigailam, 30, Besant Nagar Madras-90. MARRIAGE IN THE KAMA SUTRA OF VATSYAYANA 257 with her own consent gives herself away the palms of whose hands and the soles of to the bridegroom. She is old enough whose feet are always perspiring. to function without a guardian for the Yagnavalkya mentions the following marriage. The marriage of Sakuntala conditions as mandatory for a Shastraic to Dushyanta is an example. Hindu Marriage : Even though the latter forms are 1. The bride should not be a sapinda but also mentioned by Vatsyayana he accords should be separated by seven degrees sanction to the Gandharva form only on the father's side and by five degrees because even though formed under un on the mother's side. favourable circumstances, it is the result 2. She should not have the same gothra of mutual love and ends in happiness. or pravara as the bridegroom. It is needless to point out that 3. She should not have been married to Rakshasa and the Paisacha forms are another earlier. He would also liable to criminal prosecution and the recommend that the bride marriages would be null and void. 1. Should not be a widow The ideal marriage according to 2. Should be good looking. Vatsyayana is between man and a woman 3. Should be younger in years (shorter belonging to the same caste : the woman in stature). should be a virgin should be of a good 4. Should be healthy family whose parents are alive and should 5. Should have brothers. be three years or more younger than the It could be seen that there is no ban man, should be of a wealthy family with on child marriage or polygamy: there is good connections. Her personality and a ban on widow remarriage and there is features are specified : she should be no thought about divorce. However, beautiful, of a good disposition with lucky Vatsyayana seems to be aware of the marks on her body, and with good hair, remarriage of virgin-widows. nails, teeth, ears, eyes and breasts neither The validity of remarriage of Hindu more nor less than they ought to be no widows was established by Hindu Widow's one of them entirely wanting, and not Marriage Act, 1856. Child marriages troubled with a sickly body. The man were made a Penal Office by the Child should, of course, also possess these quali Marriage Restraint Act, 1929. The ties himself. Minimum age for marriage under this The negative points for the bride are act is 15 for the bride and 18 for the bride enumerated : groom. One who is kept concealed, one The present position in the Hindu who has an ill sounding name, one whose Marriage Act is found in the section V of nose is depressed, one who has her nos the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955. trils turned up, one who is formed like a A marriage may be solemnized bet male, one who is bent down, one who ween any two Hindus, if the following has crooked thighs, one who has a pro conditions are fulfilled : jecting forehead, one who has a bald 1. Neither party has a spouse living at head, one who does not like purity, one the time of the marriage. who has been polluted by another, one 2. At the time of marriage, neither who is affected with glandular enlarge party— ments in any part of the body, one who (a) is incapable of giving a valid consent is disfigured in any way, one who is a to it in consequence of unsoundness friend, one who is a younger sister, one of mind or 256 6. SOMASUNDARAKi (b) Though capable of giving a valid appearance. She should surround the consent, has been suffering from house with a garden. She should behave mental disorder of such a kind or to with decorum towards the parents, rela such an extent as to be unfit for marri tions, friends, sisters and servants of her age and the procreation of children husband. She should always be accom or panied by her husband, properly attired (c) Has been subjected to recurrent while visiting friends, relatives and attacks of insanity or epilepsy. temples. She should avoid bad expres 3. The bridegroom has completed the sions, sulky looks, speaking aside, standing age of 21 years and the bride the age in the doorway, and looking at passer by, of 18 years at the time of marriage. conversing in the pleasure groves and 4. The parties are not within the degrees remaining in a lonely place for a long of prohibited relationship, unless the time. She should always keep her body, custom or usage governing each of her teeth, her hair and every thing belong them permits of a marriage between ing to her tidy, sweet and clean. the two. There is good advice for her hus 5. The parties are not sapindas of each band's menu. The kitchen should be other, unless the custom of usage situated in a quiet and retired place, so governing each of them permits of a as not to be accessible to strangers, and marriage between the two. should always look clean. She should After the marriage, the sagacious store various household medicaments and Vatsyayana advises the husband that he herbs and other articles which might be should have sexual union with his wife scarce at other times. The expenditure after a period of 7-10 days, during which of the year should be regulated by the he slowly creates confidence by various profits. She should prepare by herself means. If the lovers happened to be rice, ghee, oil and jaggery. Spining young children, Vatsyayana gives a detai and weaving should be done at home. led account of winning the confidence of She should pay particular attention to the girl after dispelling fears and preju all aspects of farming including livestock. dices. Thus she is his life companion and better Vatsyayana does not feel the follow half. Women acting thus acquire Dharma, ing men to be worthy of marriage : One Artha and Kama, obtain a high-posi given to much travelling, one devoted to tion and generally keep their husbands sports and gambling, and one who has devoted to them. fallen from his social position. There is an elaborate section 'About While describing qualities of a vir the wives of other men'. Some of the tuous wife, Vatsyayana almost delineates chapters being titled—about making an ideal wife for all times and all cultures. acquaintance with the woman and of the It may not be possible to detail all her efforts to gain her over', 'examination qualities here but a few would suffice. of the state of a woman's 'mind', about She should act in conformity with the love of persons in authority for the his wishes as if he were a divine being, wives of other men, etc.

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