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Intimacy, Marriage, and Risk in Turn-Of-The-Century Berlin

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Intimacy, Marriage, and Risk in Turn-Of-The-Century Berlin © 2014 Tyler Carrington LOVE IN THE BIG CITY: INTIMACY, MARRIAGE, AND RISK IN TURN-OF-THE-CENTURY BERLIN BY TYLER CARRINGTON DISSERTATION Submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy in History in the Graduate College of the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, 2014 Urbana, Illinois Doctoral Committee: Professor Peter Fritzsche, Chair Professor Harry Liebersohn Professor Mark Micale Professor Mark Steinberg ABSTRACT This dissertation examines the surprising push and pull between tradition and modernity that occurred when men and women living in Europe’s fastest growing city fought off isolation and attempted to find love using self-consciously modern mindsets and technologies. Whether it was the decision to approach a stranger on the streetcar, go dancing with a co-worker, look for a mate in one of the city’s many gay bars, post a newspaper personal ad, or eschew the institution of marriage altogether and opt for a free love union, Berliners of all stripes left the shores of tradition and ventured into the choppy waters of a more individualized kind of love. And while there was much to be gained (as they describe in diaries, short stories, penny novels, and lively newspaper debates), the decision to break with the way “grandfather took grandmother” was risky, not least because these maverick Berliners were testing the boundaries of both middle- class respectability and hegemonic masculinity and femininity. In exploring Berliners’ narratives about their love lives, their metropolis, and their status as men and women, this dissertation argues that, even in a city whose most celebrated trait was its newness, traditional respectability proved remarkably robust. It reveals how Berlin – ostensibly Europe’s most liberating city at the turn of the century – was not primarily a space of sexual anonymity and romantic freedom but rather the site of immense friction between modern individualism and traditional virtue. Dissecting the way Berliners found love in the big city thus demonstrates that both modern cities and fin de siècle gender and civic identities were rooted as much in a world that was quickly fading as they were in one that was rapidly cresting the horizon. - ii - ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I have long looked forward to writing this section of my dissertation – so much so, in fact, that I started a list of people to thank long before I had even begun researching. Navigating the path that began with me starting college as a freshman and now sees me depositing my PhD dissertation took ten years, and though the title page of this work bears my name only, I have had a host of wise guides, experienced Sherpas, and friendly companions along the way. This section affords me the opportunity to thank them formally for their kindness over the years, and I am thrilled to have at long last reached the stage in this process where I can do so. Of course, this metaphorical path began a good while before I ever started college, and I should like first of all to thank my parents, Dean and Cheryl Carrington, who not only raised me in the most exemplary and wonderful way, but also scrimped and saved such that they were able to pay my way through college. Beyond that, they encouraged me to read from an early age (I am thinking here of my mom taking me to the summer reading programs at the Iowa City Public Library and of my dad creating a “penny per page” reading incentive) and dedicated a huge amount of time and effort into helping me excel in school and become a well-rounded adult. Whether it was the personalized grade-school teacher gifts my mom sent with me at Christmas and the end of the year, the many miles she put on the family Mercury Villager driving me to music lessons, show choir practices, and school study sessions, or the endless hours my dad spent behind the video camera as he recorded my many performances and (fewer) award ceremonies, my parents somehow made education something so natural, so rewarding that I, all of these years later, have never wanted to stop learning and am only now closing the book on my days as a student. - iii - I am also most grateful to my two siblings, Wes and Jacqui, who have always set the standard for academic excellence in our family. As my older brother, Wes served as my model and guide in school, and being able to follow his footsteps eliminated any uncertainty I may have had about the bewildering array of academic, extra-curricular, and life choices one encounters while growing up. I think I succeeded in school in no small part because I followed my brother’s lead in most things, and even though I usually failed to match him step for step (after all, I was not invited to our elementary school’s “extended learning program” for gifted students the way my brother had been, nor was I placed in the same extra-advanced math track as he was), his good name and rapport with teachers and coaches nevertheless made it easy for me to get off on the right foot. Indeed, I was always happy to walk into a classroom and hear the teacher say, “Are you Wes’s brother?” This continued after high school, for I even followed my brother’s footsteps in selecting a college and joined him at Wheaton College in the Chicago suburbs. The fact that Wes lived but one dorm room away from me during my freshman year gave me a giant boost in confidence and made the adjustment to college life significantly easier. I should also note that I never once felt pressured to measure up to him, and both he and my parents deserve a great deal of credit in this regard. Instead, it was our close friendship and shared childhood and adolescence that encouraged us both to thrive, and I suspect that my creativity and originality as a scholar has a lot to do with our constant and myriad efforts to come up with imaginative games (from epic G.I. Joe battles to intricate matchbox car / micro-machine universes), original challenges (from basement basketball shot circuits to two-man snow football tilts), zany songs and shows (from our patent-pending Hanes jingle to our “#50” Iowa Basketball radio show), and other miscellaneous diversions as a dynamic duo. - iv - Our sister, Jacqui, usually played a vital role in these activities and challenges, and I am equally thankful to her for her unflagging enthusiasm for our ideas and willingness to play the role of what I now recognize as my first student. Family photographs show the two of us acting out one collaborative charade after the next, and I, as her older brother, was seemingly always directing the show and instructing her as I did so. From the many times she served as the secretary to a businessman who, despite his young age, looked legitimate thanks to his dad’s old briefcase to the countless movie scenes we acted out line by line, Jacqui was the perfect younger sibling, laughing at my jokes, listening intently to my descriptions of the social dynamics of this or that Lego village, and doing her best to abide by the improvised and always-changing rules of whatever game we were playing. Even though I was scarcely aware of it at the time, I suspect that having Jacqui as my eager sidekick, pupil, and audience made me want to become a teacher before I ever started school. Of course, Jacqui did so well in school herself (she got better grades than my brother and I ever did) that I perhaps should have let her do the teaching and directing all of those years (indeed, she ultimately did become a star math teacher); but I am forever thankful to her for being my little sister and for helping me develop the self-confidence and love for instructing that are so important to me today. Profound thanks are also due to my grandparents, Verne and Marlene Folkmann, who played no small role in making my education possible. On the most practical level, they provided both the roof that protected me from snow, rain, and cold as I wrote this dissertation and the car that helped me transport heavy loads of books to and from the library. For that matter, they also helped pay for my college tuition. Their most important contribution to this endeavor, however, has no doubt been their time. Football tailgates in Iowa City on fall Saturdays offered welcome diversions from the work of processing piles and piles of research materials, and I came up with - v - a number of key ideas and arguments for this dissertation during those 250-mile drives to and from Iowa City. My grandma’s famous sandwiches, (gumbo) soups, cookies, and supply of Fresca also helped fuel (and quench) the entire process, as well. My grandparents have, in fact, provided this level of care and involvement throughout my entire life, and I have a hard time seeing how I would have reached this point without them. It is also with great pleasure that I take this opportunity to thank my wife’s family for their help in completing this project. My mother-in-law, Royann Mraz, financed, among other things, more than one repair to the Volkswagen she let us drive when we needed two cars, and she always sent us back to Urbana with a full compliment of goodies. Her visits, which generally involved a trip to Urbana’s exquisite barbeque restaurant, Black Dog, always brightened our week, and we spent many a weekend relaxing at her home in Iowa City, where my brother-in- law, Eric Ammann, has always made me laugh.
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