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By Debbie Metzler © Copyright 2012, Pioneer Drama Service, Inc. Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that a royalty must be paid for every performance, whether or not admission is charged. All inquiries regarding rights should be addressed to Pioneer Drama Service, Inc., PO Box 4267, Englewood, CO 80155. All rights to this play—including but not limited to amateur, professional, radio broadcast, television, motion picture, public reading and translation into foreign languages—are controlled by Pioneer Drama Service, Inc., without whose permission no performance, reading or presentation of any kind in whole or in part may be given. These rights are fully protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America and of all countries covered by the Universal Copyright Convention or with which the United States has reciprocal copyright relations, including Canada, Mexico, Australia and all nations of the United Kingdom. COPYING OR REPRODUCING ALL OR ANY PART OF THIS BOOK IN ANY MANNER IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN BY LAW. On all programs, printing and advertising, the following information must appear: 1. The full name of the play 2. The full name of the playwright 3. The following notice: “Produced by special arrangement with Pioneer Drama Service, Inc., Englewood, Colorado” For preview only A WALK IN THE WOODS By DEBBIE METZLER CAST OF CHARACTERS (In Order of Appearance) # of lines GOLDILOCKS ......................orphan heroine 98 PAPA BEAR..........................skeptical patriarch 29 MAMA BEAR .......................sensible mother 22 BABY BEAR .........................suspicious son 24 JACK HORNER .....................also of beanstalk fame 49 GYPSY ................................grifter 18 BUTCHER ...........................protective parent 25 JILL ....................................Butcher’s daughter 15 RED RIDING HOOD ..............wolf-weary woodswoman 40 WOLF .................................big and bad 18 BAKER ................................shopkeeper 14 CANDLESTICK MAKER .........another 16 WITCH ................................evil spell caster 14 GRANDMOTHER ..................Mildred of bad eyesight 8 WOODSMAN .......................remorseful father of Hansel and 18 Gretel HAYWARD PIG .....................the straw builder 17 STICKLY PIG ........................the stick builder 17 MASON PIG.........................the brick builder 14 HANSEL ..............................young boy 18 GRETEL ..............................girl a few years older than Hansel 24 SETTING Various locations in Grimm’s Woods back in fairy-tale time. SET DESCRIPTION The road in the woods is played in front of the curtain and has a tree and rock DOWN RIGHT, as well as other strategically placed shrubs and trees as desired. The Three Bears’ Cottage has a window UP RIGHT and door UP CENTER. Near the door, there is a hat stand with a hat on it and a fishing pole resting against the wall. A table is CENTER with conspicuously small, medium and large chairs around it. The table is set with small, medium ii NOTE:For PHOTOCOPYING preview THIS SCRIPT BREAKS FEDERAL only COPYRIGHT LAWS and large bowls, three spoons and a candle as the centerpiece. There is a stove RIGHT with a kettle on it and a round rug nearby. Deep in the woods is also played in front of the curtain. Lighting can suggest a dense forest. Add in other trees and rocks, with one rock specifically DOWN CENTER. Grandmother’s Cottage has a door UP CENTER and a window UP RIGHT. There is a bed CENTER with a nightstand and a stool next to the bed and a dresser to one side. There is a radio, a book and a pair of eyeglasses on the nightstand. The Three Little Pigs’ Houses require three flats or cutouts: a house of straw, a house of sticks and a brick house. Each house needs to have a working door and a large window. The window on the brick house has shutters. Construction debris is strewn about the stage. The straw house and the stick house both have a lawn chair in front. The Witch’s Gingerbread House has a door UP CENTER and a window UP RIGHT. The room also has a cage with a set of keys hanging just out of reach from it and a large, black cauldron with a stick in it for stirring. A lid for the cauldron lies nearby. Near the door there’s a cookie jar with a cookie in it. Despite the candy motif, the house has all the charm of a dungeon. NOTE: Since the sets for the Three Bears’ Cottage, Grandmother’s Cottage and the Witch’s Gingerbread House all have a door UP CENTER and a window UP RIGHT, set changes can be simplified by using the same set for each and only changing the décor. SYNOPSIS OF SCENES Prologue: A road in the woods. Scene One: The Three Bears’ Cottage. Scene Two: A road in the woods. Scene Three: Deep in the woods. Scene Four: A road in the woods. Scene Five: Grandmother’s Cottage. Scene Six: A road in the woods. Scene Seven: The Three Little Pigs’ Houses. Scene Eight: A road in the woods. Scene Nine: Witch’s Gingerbread House. Scene Ten: A road in the woods. Epilogue: A road in the woods. iii For preview only A WALK IN THE WOODS PROLOGUE 1 LIGHTS UP: A road in the woods, played in front of the curtain. GOLDILOCKS ENTERS LEFT and crosses DOWN RIGHT to sit on the rock, oblivious to the presence of the AUDIENCE. She is wearing a red cloak. She unwraps a small biscuit and begins to take a bite, then 5 realizes she is being watched. GOLDILOCKS: (To AUDIENCE.) Oh, my! Where did you come from? (Puts the biscuit back into her pocket.) I didn’t realize you were there. My mother used to say, “Goldilocks”—she called me that because, you know… (Points to her hair.) …the hair. “Goldilocks, 10 it’s not polite to eat in front of others if you haven’t enough to share.” I’d offer you some, but there are, well, several of you, and if we had to split it up, you can imagine how crummy that would be… hah! Crummy—get it? Crumbs? That’s all we’d get? Hah! Uh, well, anyhow… I do hope you’re not too hungry. Food isn’t easy to 15 come by in these woods. In fact, trying to keep from starving can be a full-time job. Seems everyone is searching for something around these parts. But it’s not all gloomy, you understand? Out here, just when you think life is the worst it can get, things begin to look up. Only a few days ago, I was getting pretty desperate 20 until I stumbled onto that cottage up the road. I’ll tell you the story if you have a minute. You do have the time, don’t you? It’s rather an unusual story, but that’s not surprising in these woods. You have heard about Grimm’s Woods, right? No? Well, let me tell you. Ahem… Once upon a— uh, hmmm… once there was a… 25 um… huh, well… long, long ago there lived a… hmmm. I know, close your eyes… Imagine stumbling upon the strangest little cottage with the strangest little family of bears living there. Yes, I said bears! I know it sounds impossible, bears living in a cottage the same way that humans do, but as I said before, nothing is 30 surprising in Grimm’s Woods! Scene One AT RISE: GOLDILOCKS EXITS RIGHT as the CURTAIN OPENS on the Three Bears’ Cottage. PAPA BEAR is sitting at the table reading the newspaper, MAMA BEAR is near the stove stirring porridge in a kettle and BABY BEAR is putting gumdrop candies on a gingerbread house. 35 PAPA BEAR: Would you look at this? More wolf sightings in the woods, near the village! What a bunch of wackos! Still telling those old wives’ tales about that big bad wolf! 1 For preview only 1 MAMA BEAR: Now, Harry, some of those reports came from some very reliable folks. In fact, Julia Horner was saying her dog chased away a wolf that was trying to steal a plum pie right out of her kitchen window! 5 PAPA BEAR: Yeah, yeah. A wolf named Jack Horner! I caught him sticking his thumb right into the middle of a pie over at the baker’s shop in the village. Little weasel! Hiding in the corner, thinking nobody’d see him. Kid needs a haircut and a job! Besides, those humans get worked up over anything, and it’s no wonder! They sit 10 around telling stories about wicked stepmothers and witches! BABY BEAR: My friend Mason told me they had a terrible time with a wolf. He threatened to huff and puff— PAPA BEAR: And bloooow the house down? Nonsense! (Puts the newspaper down, stands and crosses to MAMA BEAR.) Talking 15 wolves, humph! What next? Dancing frogs? (To MAMA.) Say, watchya making? I’m hungry as a… as a… MAMA BEAR: Bear, dear? Hungry as a bear? PAPA BEAR: Yeah, yeah. I suppose so. Who made that one up, anyway? Those humans must think all we do is eat and hibernate. 20 MAMA BEAR: Well, never mind the humans, dear. I’m fixing your favorite, porridge with just a touch of butter and honey. I thought while it cooled, we could go out and gather some fresh berries for dinner tonight. There are some beautiful blackberries down by Elder Creek that the blue jays haven’t discovered yet! 25 BABY BEAR: Do I have to go? I’m putting the gumdrops on the witch’s gingerbread house, and I don’t want the frosting to dry out! MAMA BEAR: Good heavens! Baby Bear, why on earth are you making a replica of the old witch’s candy house? BABY BEAR: Well, you said never to go near the witch’s house, no 30 matter how yummy it looked… sooooo, I made my own from gingerbread! MAMA BEAR: As long as you stay far away from the real one! The old witch can’t be trusted.