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Th ursday, ovember 8 , 2007 Vol. 38 , Issue 10
The Shield is a designated t>Ublie forum. What's in ~ this issue? SPJ challenges speaker policv By ETB C RUNDHOEFER 'The rime has come to forcibly issued a sencs ofe-mruls p1I1p0int were taken. He was soon asked to ulty advisor The hicld staff free our family memebers from mg the violation of state and fed· leave. Tew sa1d the university's policy their captors, even if that means erallaw published on Yourofsky's In the case of last April, meas could effectively be used to reJect •• Darren Mack pleads Tite Society of Profe ional mjuring or k:ilhng someone in the Web site to Bennett. Kissel d1d ures were taken against Yourofsky speakers like Manin Luther King. guilty for murder Journalists "'direct ly challenged"' process." not deny or confum the contents regarding his violation of universi Jr., who habitually broke federal Page 3 USI's Outside peakers Poli cy Bennett said the compl aints of the online article. ty policy, even though he had law, dunng the civil rights move last week by inviting cancelled began with an anonymous source, "'I understand that a talk by hosted lecutreS in classrooms at menL • • Another shade of speaker and animal right's activis~ went straight to the administration Gary Yourofsky, who advocates US I after tlte ETSU mc1dent. Accordmg to Fox 7 news, USI and dean of students and ended the killing of children,. the rape of Harnington told T11e Shield m Pres1dem H. Ray Hoops sa1d green Gary Yourofsky back to campus. w;l.h Maurice Hamington, assis women, the anal rape of men and April, "'Just as a precaution, we Yourofsky can appear on campus; Page 4 Last Apri l, the university' pol i cy was used to deny Yourofsky, tant professor of philosophy and the death of SCientists, is still sub went ahead and cancelled." however he found it m .. poor who lectures on "ethical vegan Philosophy lub advisor. ject to the Umversity's Outside Yourofsky has given over I ,400 taste.'' , • Saturday Night Live ism," a platform at US I. On the day of the even~ Ham Speakers Policy," Kissel said in lecutreS on "ethical veganism," SP J still stresses Yourofsky's hits stride Under the policy, the universiy ington revoked Yourofsky's invi regards to US I's policy and the and this spring he wtll return to freedom of speech as well as the Page 5 can deny any speaker who may tation to speak, even though the language of Yourofsky's essay, USI. courtesyofSPJ. student's academic freedom to "advocate the violation of state or Philosophy Club was the origmal "Empathy, Education and Vio In the SPJ news release, the hear him. • • Republican Ernie federal law." sponsor. lence." policy that denied Yourofsky a "'I want an open forum where Fletcher's one last Tite cancellation process began '"The university over-reacted m Bennett said Yourofsky di - platform at USL, is considered an anyone can invite controversiaJ effo rt for governor with a stream of complaints a dictator-Like fashion aod failed to played ''violent-like behavior" "obstacle to freedom of speech." people to campus," Tew said. fails anonymously submitted to understand the words of my during a lecture at Eastern Ten The policy has managed to stay PageS Provost and Vice President of 'Empathy, Education and Vio nessee State University in 2003. untouched since 1968 arid was Academic Affairs Linda Bennet~ lence essay" Yourofsky said. After a fuculty memeber presented taken straight from US! 's mother exposing violent language 1vithin According to pamphlets showing the benefits of college, Indiana State University. Yourofsky's Web si te Adaptt.org, frontpagemag.com, Glen Kissel. animal testing, Yourofsky became "Our policy doesn't match our .Media which reads: assistant professor of engineering, violent and security measures culture," said Chad Tew, SPJ fac- day Foam takes over smart fountain ·:returns Nearly 200 igh school ·ournalists ·sit university 3y LIND EY ZJLIAK ews editor
The scene is different. The pur se remams the same. High ~ hool Media Day returnS to US I fter a two year hiatuS. Nearly 200 high school journal ists will visit US I on Friday for the 6th annual High chool Media Day. This event comes after being sent for almost two years. It was temporarily cancelled becnuse of tructuring. The restructuring involved anging a key aspect of the event. viously, media day was coordi ~llllled by The Evansville ourier and Press. ow the Courier and l'ress helps out. Gael ooper, asso ciate professor of public relations . .. directing the event through the ripps Howard enter for Media tudies. High School Media Day has ently takt.:n on a new date as l'ell. Titc event is being held in the II foronlythesecondyear. For 14 1 ear.; tt was on spring break. 'The tudents come to an empty npus. We didn't thmk that was I:nght. We have a lot gomg on on is campusJ nnd we wanted them lo see tlta~" Cooper said. ooper also said that the fall te should have minimal effects " students who have class that y. Some classes had to be moved f ~hit c ~nnss rcsc~blin g u soupy mushroom cloud billowed fro m th e fountai n ln~t week on Oct. 30. Late night ca mpus d\\ ell ers co uldn 't rrsist the fun as they flu no plumes lo make room for the high school ~vnt~~"~- ~n;~ 1th e' D.lr. "I'm sure they' ll .gct. il agai n tornorro"," sa id John n) Liggett, member of the ccood shift maintenance, as he dumped a lnrgc bo~ of defomte; into the tudenb, and two cl~ are actu • P_t) bottle of condensed UqUid laundry soa p and bubble-bath \\ flS ~nid to hn' e bl"Cn the only C\'idcncc to the crime The foam survived rhe nioht to orect n1dcnts lh e nex t mormng. · eo c lly a«ending a scss•on •nstead of lass that day. Photo by Zach Adkins Despite the changes, tltis year's High hool Media Day will be ically the same. The event 1vi ll •ck off '"th a keynote address :rom Mizell Stewar1 Ill , editor of .he Evansville Courier and Press. Repertory project puts USI 'a step ahead' = ll01ving the address, tc1Var1 1vill By AURIA D CHAt H Conquer and Th<• Cntcib/e. om It others m presenting vonous sion," said Jasmine Ruckricgcl, a to know for the future JO>Cph the Actors Equity Association peciaJ to the h1eld By bringing tlus project to ' !<:ill) intC~l o:tCSSIOn5. The M:S phomore at US! Bowen. a member of the Actors smce 1989. He IS ongmally from U I, the student> wuhin the the he lNIId betng able to work '1 ns nrc designed to give the stu l11c University of ulhcm Equ 1ty Association. has talke-d C\\ York and now !J, cs in Chica atre program are not only able to with professional actors has Jcnt> ops to become better joumal lndinnn is one of on ly n few with the tudents about man) go. He learned about the project >l' and 1mprove their high school 's sec what bemg a professiOnal helped her to know more of what aspects of professional acting. schools to have a progrnm in a tor i• like. but tl1ey are also clos '' hile worklng at the e\\ Harmo ewspapcr or yearbook. IS to be e'pected ns a profess•onal One imponant thtng he has ny Theatre over the summer and w~1ich students nrc able to perfonn er to earrnng thc.r equity card. To The high school JOurnalists will actor nnd l1 gi' a sense of how d1scussed is the auditionmg wanted to be a pan of 1L at only wtth professional actors. The be m the Actors Equity Associa "n d their day with nn awnrd 's an eqlllty card actually work>. process. lie smd that the audmon is thts experience good tbr the stu Rcpcnory Project has greatly tion o person must have an equ ty ~~ h<:<> n m Clll1er llall. The par 1 Ruckncgcl plays Marry Warren m is a huge part of the JOb. dents, but also for the professional Impacted not onl y the student.. but card. For tl1e most part, to get an 'IC tpallng schools were allowed to 77"· ClllcJble and has nlso per "It 1s a three mmutc chance to actors as wei I tl1e entire tllcatre progrnm at u 1. equity card an actor has to earn 50 oc.""'ld in their newspaper or year. Four professional nctors and fomted tn USl's Ja<·ques Bll!l Is get to act c\·eryday or every Bowen play Mr. Hardcastle k to be Judged in II diftcrent points. The students that are span Aln•t• OJ/ll Well w1d Living in Paris week," Bowen smd one stnge manager from the of The Rcpcnory Project will have 111 She Stoops to Conquer and tegorics including best ovcrnll Actors Equi ty Association are tak and Eleemo:,ynal)1• There is a workshop for the Deputy-Governor Danforth m T11e ewspaper and best ovcrull ycar earned eight points towards their The tudents are able to hear students to attend on audJtiomng. in!l pan in llte Repertory ProJect card after tl1 e plays have ended on CniCible. By havmg two very dif k. In tlte pas~ the ourier has first-hand the stories and experi There are nlso workshops on top th1s year. lltey inc lude Jose-ph ovember 18. For every week of ferent lone the JUdging. This year, it will Bowen. Phillip Clark, Michele ences of actors who have been in ics of business and Shakespeare. Judged through U l. 1\velve rehearsals wtd perfonnanccs. they tlle business for yean;. n •• equity Fugate, Mark lri h and helley cam one pomL Titesc workshops are all taught by hools are currently signed up to McPherson. Bach of the actors are actors have also given these stu· the professional a tors them ttend the evcnL "'It puts us one step ahead of dents tmportant advice that others selves. performing in both She Sloops to schools and studen ts in the profcs- not in dtis typcofprogtam arc able Bowen has been a member of cc THEATER on page 8 •• Page 2- Tlte Shiel d - Thursday, November 8 , 2007 Video games may have use in classroom
By ABRlA DUGHAJSH young age. In the late 80's is defended video games in 1)-ont of Some types of video games dif help out with the story of the video not think this can occur with video pecial to the Shield when video games started becom ongress. fer than others. Indigo Prophecy game. games. Jones disagrees and ing very popular with game sys Jones said he tl1inks that ·tu is a video game that acts more like "That these games are not to be believes that they can. With video games becoming tems like Nintendo. l11e hobby of dents can better understand games a movie. Movies use the tenni dismissed as just games, whether It is not certain whether or not more and more advanced each video games stayed 'vith Jones or movies rntl1cr than books. They nology of chapters instead of they are intended as such they are video games wil l be a complete year. there are some people tllRt throughout his life. It was not are much LnO{e engaging, and games. l11e game also opens li ke constructing meaning," said Tom part of a class's learning experi believe they can be a useful tool until grnduate school he staned to many people today are stimulated a movie with credits and mus ic Ri vers, professor of English. ence. Jones said that technology within the classroom. The ques question whether this was just a by visual imagery. Jones has, at pl ayi ng in the background. Also, Jones said that the game Grand over time crept into the classroom tion being asked 'vith video games hobby or if there were more to times, used video games to help in the opening scene of the video Theft Auto is satire, which is also more and more. is whether or not they are ab le to these video games. demonstrate topics such as heroes game, the main character can be found in literature. The game is People who believe in todny's tell a story. His research started \vith every and epics in his classes. heard discussing what has hap built around cu lturnl stereotypes. soctety expect there to be tory David Jones, instructor of Eng day conversations with his room "I tl1ink it is n good way of pened to him. Some people that disagree with platform among different rypes of lish at the University of Southern mates in grnduate school on the holding tl1c student's interest, but I The gan1cr or player is able to the theory that video games can media like books and movies, but Indiana, is one person in particular subject. When he started to do not tl1ink it should be used choose fro m a few di fferent tell a story because of things such also now in video games as well . who believes that certain videos research more in depth, he real dnily,"said Erin Reichel. sntdent at options as what to do next instead as story time, the moment in Some of which include Harry Pot do tell a story. He has done ized bow much research had US I. of only having one speci fi c tlting which the story happened, and dis ter and Lord of the Rings. research on tl1is topic and spoken already been done on video She also went on to say that the tt> do like in most games. With the course time, when Ute story was "(Video) games might be at lectures as well. One of these games. One name he came across tory line possibilities in books are differe nt choices, the gan1cs are told or read within a story or piece another evolutionary step in litera lectures was at US! on Oct. 26. was Henry Jenkins who is a pro infi nite un like video games that given differe nt outcomes. Each of literature. In a piece of litera ture," Jones said. His interest 'vith videos games fessor at Massachusetts Institute have to follow preplanned direc ti me the game is played it can tum ture, these two thing come started as most peoples' do at a of Technology. Jenkins has tions. out differently. The gamer gets to together as one. People who do The turkey isn't the same without ., ODDS ARE, the stuffing. ~Y-l YOU'RE NOT ~)({f . GOING TO HAVE What would Plymouth Rock be = ATOP TEN SONG. without the ROCK?
KimMcado11 Dir«ror of Dtvdopmmr Notthwest= Mutwl Financial N""'":k-Evuuvillc 33) Cross l'uintc Soukvard Evasuv~lc:. IN 4771 5 \811\ 471-2493
Wednesday, November 14, 2007 11 :00 a.m. - 2:00 p.m. University Center, Carter Hall
Sponsored by: USI Career Services & Placement
Full-Time Job Opportunities Internships I Co-ops Part-Time Job Opportunities All Students Encouraged to Attend
ADM (Archer Daniels Midland) Indiana INTERNnet American Cancer Society Indiana State University American General Finance Indiana University School of Medicine American Red Cross- SW Indiana Indianapolis Peace Institute Atlas Van Lines lnGen Technologies, Inc. Backhaul Direct Integra Bank Berry Plastics ITT Technical Institute Bob's Gym JET Program Branchville Correctio nal Facility Kelly Services, Inc. Bridges of India na Kentucky Data Link CEO (Consolidate d El ectrical Distributors) Kroger Food Stores C. H. Robinson Worldwide, Inc. MasterBrand Cabinets, Inc. Ci ntas Millennium Steel Services . Clark Dietz, Inc. Northwestern Mutual Financial Network Dea coness Hospital Ozanam Family Shelter Dell, Inc. Rural King Supply, Inc. Enter prise Rent-A-Car SABIC Innovative Plastics (fonnorty GE Plas tics) Evansville ARC/ARC Industries St. Mary's Medical Center Evansville Police Departme nt Sherwin-Williams Company Fastenal Industrial Supply Solarbron Fifth Third Bank Southern Illinois University School of Law Finish Line Target GAF Materials/ELK T.J. Maxx Distribution Center Grain Processing Corporation United States Air Force Growth Alliance Greater Evansville u.s. Army Recruiting -Evansville Historic New Harmony USI Human Resources Indiana Department of Child Services Wells Fargo Financial Fo'r more infoFmation: www.usi.edu/careersv/ The Shie ld - Students drink less with age Mack pleads (U-WIRE) SYRACUSE, N.Y. - Though turning 21 is a tick NDAR et to legal drinking, interviews wi th students and experts reveal that EVENT reaching this milestone only lessens alcohol consumption TIME guilty for murder among students. PLACE "Before I turned 21, I cenain Thursday November 8, ly drank a lot," sa1d Woo Jin Koh, Clothing Drive Darren Mack murders wife and shoots judge a 24-year-old Syracuse University AJ.L DAY sophomore. "Once I turned 21 , I didn't drink as much." LAS VEGAS (AP)-A man 17-18, saying he wanted to allow guilty pleas was insignificant to The theory that drinking pat- accused of killing his wife and time for statements, and Mack us.'' David Chesnoff, one of terns of srudents change when they shooting the judge who was han made it clear be wanted to speak. dling their biner divorce reached a 'There are some very impor Mack's lawyers, said he was are able to buy and consume alco tant things to say, and I've pleased that Mack likely will have hoi legally was confirmed by a plea deal Monday, bringing an 2000 study in The American Jour abrupt end to his trial. remained quiet through this whole a chance to be released on parole. nat of Preventive Medicine titled Darren Mack, 46, pleaded thing," Mack·said. Charla Mack's mother, "Environmental Correlates of guilty to first-
ByJ.J. LUTZ such resttnints. of overwhelming evidence of war pizza delivery guy because tlte sway your vote in the upcoming political race? The Shield slllff Former Hallibunon employ profiteering. tn December 2003, more they interrogated the more ees claim that KBR orders the when the Defense Contract Audit money tl1ey made. The U.S. Government has so wrong equipment, then throws it Agency fbund that KBR had Dyncorp International, "I think it is neccssaty for tl' to much money that it has hired in the pit and invoices the go crn- overcharged for fuel by $61 mil which receives billions to train move into that directmn It " .t ¥OOC Hallibunon to burn it. The com- ment for it. They \vill bum an lion dollars. the Army Corps sim Iraqi troops, is being investigated idea because ifthiO{!'t COOIIOUI.! Ill pony's subsidiary, KBR, operates entire vehicle for having a bad ply relieved KBR of any need to for massive fraud. Investigators the way they arc going now, the burn pits ne." tO US bases in Iraq. tire; anything that malfunctions in provide cost information and say the books are in such disarrny environment is only gotng to get Some cover an area the size of any way goes into the pit. The fired their audi tor, Bunnatine they have given up trying to audit worse." sixteen football fields and operate more they spend, the more they Greenhouse when she objected. them. Some have accused con around the clock. What they are make and you wouldn't believe KBR 's abuses include pro tractors hired to train Iraqi troops Freshman Alex Feldbusch mainly burning is US taxpayer bow good those industrious U viding polluted water for our sol of not wanting to work them Buincss Admini>tration money. contractors in Iraq have gonen at diers to bathe in and overcharging selves out of a job. The longer the This situation springs from a spending taxpayer money. billions of dollars for services not process can be drawn out the wonderful creation called the Hallibunon didn't even have provided or double billed. more money the contracting firms cost-plus contract. With a cost- to bid for their cost-plus con- Meanwhile, KBR continues to be make. plus contract, the company tracts. Dick Cheney was CEO of paid $99 per bag to wash clothes Employees of contracting mvoices the customer for any Hallibunon before becoming Vioe for US soldiers while the troops firms now outnumber U.S. troops e:
The Shield l dUorial Board UftZBS '1'0 'l'IIJIIDITOR Business Manager ODISTCOIOIIR!Ailll l diwr-ln.(lhief Opinion editor Christina Warren The Shield accepts original. unpubllsbed lst Sl-IIELO The Shield Is a designated publlo fol'\1111· ters from all or Its readers. Letters should be no www.uslshield.com Brandl Weyer Brooklyn Solis Advenltl.ng Manager [email protected] News editor 1\ Cetera editor Signed opinions are published to provtde more than 260 words. Letters must be signed Andy Wilkins diverse viewpoints and to encourage debalt on and have a telephone number for verification. Lindsey Zlllak J on Webb Olrc:ula\lon Manager lseuse Important to the university commUDIIJ• The editor reserves the right to edit for length, Spons editor Online editor Suoh oommentarles represent ths vtews of \Ill style, grammar and spelling. Pieces wtU appear In Ryan DeLaney Zach Crowell Kelon Boyde author and not necessarily those of thiS neWI' The Shield Online. Letters can be submitted Presentation Manager paper. online or vta e-mall. Oplnlou eqroand In QDJ""ed edltorlala repreaent a couenna Zaohary Adkins opinion o ~ the editorlol board- EtCetera ____ ...,;;,;;iiiii;:~~i!f:l!!!l!!!!!•- -M~us~l~c,~M;o;v;le;s~a~n;d~S;tu;d;e~n;t~L;;;:_ - an 1 Thurs day, November 8, 2007 :· The Shield· Pages Saturday Night Live hits stride The high Classic sketch-comedy show fmally climbs out of its funk - just in time for its writers to strike. ., By BLAKE BE HAM home. Island (Amy Poehler and Maya to recognize him. price of ., The Shield staff TI1e catch? All the Democrat· Rudolph) interview a fireman The remainder of the show ic pres idential candidates were (Williams) and eventually become wasn 't spectacular, but plenty of With the tltreat of a writer' invited. Hillary Clinton (Amy so worked up about personal laughs were provided. "Weekend strike looming, Satwriay Night Poehler), dressed as a bride often issues, they leave him alone to do Update" was solid and Fred Live attempted to go on tl1e indef confused for a witch, played host· tl1eshow. Annisen provided yet another - inite hiatus with some momentum css with her husband Bill (Darrell 1\vo commercial parodies quality commentary, this time as a Hannah this past weekend, with NBC Hammond). found tl1eir way to air. TV executive who doesn't under anchonnan Brian Williams as host The fonner presiden ~ natu· The first was for a new prod stand what all the fuss is about • and quirky Feist as musical guest. rally, dressed as "Mystery" from uc~ Maybelline: Makeup for Men. from TV writers. With mostly a dismal show tl1e Vh I how 17te Pickup Artist. The second was a spoof on Annisen continued to steal ing up to this poio~ SNL needed to All of the costumed candi the iPhone ads, where Fred the show on a Larry JGng Live - salvage the potentially hortened dates were impressively imper· Annisen plays a man who demon spoof. As Larry King, Annisen Montana season by providing a consistently sonated, including Bill Richandson strates how the iPhone can be used interviewed J.K. Rowling funny show with well -written (Horatio Sanz) in an AI Gore cos to cover up an adulterous affair. (Poehler) about the recent procla By BROOKLYN SOLIS He was offered the role of her sketches and solid perfonnances tume, Chris Dodd and Joe Biden Arguably the best sketch of mation that Dumbledore from the· Opinion editor father. Makes sense, but most by the cast and host (Bill H ~der and Jason Sudeikis) as the night poked fun at CW dramas Harry Potter movies and books "tweens" have no idea who be is. What resulted was arguably Spongebob Squarepants, respec fo r teens. In the sketch producers was gay. Actress. They don't know about his own the best episode of tl1e season. tively and Dennis Kucinich for tl1e show Rileys Way filmed Another Democratic debate Pop Star. acid wash jeans and infamous SNL couldn 't have chosen a more (unknown child actor) as a Christ the last scene of the series. sketch followed Machine. mullet hairsryle. unfortunate time to hit its stride. maself. Things go awry, however, Here, most of the candidates Whatever you want to call At least Billy Ray aged well. The last writer's strike in At the end of the sketch, the when th e loveable principal gathered backstage, with the her, Disney Channel star Miley You never know-his song could be 1988 limited SNL to a few Clintons were approached by a (Williams) finds out he's not going exception of Hillary Clinton and Cyrus, (or Hannah Montana) has the reason why a lot of these episodes before being shut down candidate in a Barack Obama to be a part of the spin-off and Barack Obama. indirectly crushed the dneams of ''tweens"' parents are still together. fo r the season. Because of. the mask, who is revealed as Obama insists that the writers kill him off The candidates plotted ways tween fans across the nation. Perhaps wbat drives Miley's strike, original cast member Gilda himself. Another great sketch fol to steal some of Clinton's momen Tickets for her 54- date tour success is her squeaky-clean Radner, who was scheduled to "I have nothing to hide" lowed. This time, Williams plays a tum, but Williams informs them "Best of Both Worlds" sold out in image. host in the '88 season, \V8S denied Obama said to a rousing studio Publisher's Clearinghouse winner that the media has already made a matter of minutes. Hannah Montana is simple. her triumphant return. audience ovation. "I enjoy being who has a hard rime getting excit up its mind: it has decided on Tickets sold at face value for On ever·so-popular television Radner died the following myself." ed about winning $15 million. Hillary. S22 to $66 before rapidly selling show, Cyrus plays a version of year of ovarian cancer. He then shouted, '1 just want Reporter Kristen Wiig tries to In the final sketch, NBC out. After the mass hysteria, herself and pop star alter-ego Han Those who could end' up to tell the American people, live feign enthusiasm for Williams and executives hire an obscure band to scalpers sold rickets on Stubhub nah Montana being denied their moment of from New York, it's Saturday eventually begins to hyperventi create a new, hip theme song for and eBay for as much as S4,000 a Only her closest frieods know comedic glory include names such night!" late after she shows the reactions NBC Nightly News wiJh Brian seat. the nuth about her double life. The as Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, With tha~ the show began. of past winners. Williams. They eventually settle ''Nobody anticipated it would shows consists of 20 minutes of Jonah Hill, and Tom Hanks, all of Williams poked fun at himself in Williams eventually gets on a Bond-like opening th at be this much of a frenzy," Debra normal events that happeo to four whom were reportedly scheduled the monologue, wondering aloud excited, but only because the pizza crescendos into Williams saying, RathweU, senior vice president for teen year olds. Miley then magi to host. to himself and NBC if his hosting deliveryman gives him free ''lbat's how I rol.l." promoter AEG LNE said in the cally transforms into a pop Lucki ly for SNL fanf, Brian was indeed a good idea. cheesy bread. If that is indeed how Williams Rolling Stone. "I've never had so princess with the help of a blonde Williams was spared. As it rums out, the decision The SNL Digital Short was a rolls, he should be at the top of the many phone calls in my li fe from wig and glittery eyes. Thanks to the Democratic \vas certairtly a good one. look at a day in the life of list for recurring hosts. SNL was people complaining or begging." There are no racy photos of Debate on Ocl 30, the writers had In what is becoming an Williams, which surprisingly able to keep a bitter taste· out of The initial problem was not the girl floating around on the loads of political material to work alanning trend, the worst sketch of includes throwing pennies from a funs' mouths before the writer's with Ttcketmaster, even though Internet, and her clothes cover all with and certainly didn 't hold any the night was used right after the high-rise at Matt Lauer and AI strike. there were limited supplies of tick of her parts while she performs as thing back. monologue. Roker, sending encouraging With this episode, SNL ets for each venue. The blame has Hannah. The cold opening premise On .the "Bronx Beaf' - an voicemails to' himself and standing should have created some been directed at brok.:rs who used It makes sense that parents was a Halloween party hosted by overly-utilized = wring sketch - tll t:::i '_.the ' S'fd~ OutStd~ - R~ke- nlomentum going into the next "bots" to scalp as many tickets support their child's need to the Clintons at their Chappaqua two bitter housewives from Long feller Center waiting for someone show ... whenever that may be. possible. scream along to songs such as According to the Rolling "Girl's Night Out," while knowing Stone, Ttckemaster sued three the lyrics are purely innocent. such brokers and one software Perhaps the most interesting CO!)lP'lllY - RMG Technologies - part is not that Miley has a legion Striking and 'scab' -ing earlier this year alleging that the of fans, but that she has songs company has used bois to pur credited to her,;elf and Hannah. For the preservation of my chase more than 115,000 tickets She is another pop machine: A proposal to end the Hollywood writer's beloved TV, I am prepared to online since 2002. commen:iaJized and packaged in alienate the entire writing commu Perhaps just as acid \vash pink with glinery eyelids. Her strike: put TV in the hands of one man. nity. jeans have gone out ofsty le, so has mass appeal is great. The problem the idea of waiting in tine to see a By JON WEBB operating table, though, he begins I don't recall a Scrubs Stepping across company lies with scalpers honing in on this favo rite artist or group. Et Cetera editor assessing his own life. episode ever foUowing that tem lines is nothing new for me. In trend. Waiting in line used to be part Through inner monologue, plate. My scripts won't only allow 1945, I acted as a "scab" during Seeing a concert by an artist of the concert going e.~perience. On November 5, Hollywood he realizes he still loves his blonde television to persevere, but also the Canadian Ford Motor Compa like Bruce Springsteen - whose If you have the cash and the writers went on strike demanding friend/co-worker Elliot (Sarah push it in bold new directions. ny strike. career doubles Cyrus' entire life. technology, however, you aren't a larger share of DVD revenues Chalke). Drama 'viii not die on my For 99 1ong days - faced \vith rime - is already too pricey. Pre going to have to brave the weather and compensation for content Also, the inexpl icably hateful watch, either. the harsh Canadian late autumn - I dictions that his tickets too could broadcast over the Internet. The or fear loosing your spot in line. disap janitor gives J.D. some sort of r ~ m cwrently working on a single-handedly manned the sky rocket has concertgoers strike will - for now - halt pro Who would have ever imag pointed in the whole system. duction of late-night talk shows 'We've hunkered down for a long one.' ined that the daughter of Billy Ray "It's one thing to have an (ala The Daily Show) and eventu Cyrus would have so much suc angr'y Springsteen fan," said a ally stall all scripted, primetime Nick Counter cess? Rolling Stone industry source. television. Hollywood producer's union negotiator Billy Ray's heart isn 't achy or ult's another to have an angry soc~ According to the Associated breaky anymore, because he too cer mom whose twelve-year-old Press, fh:s h episodes of shows like has enjoyed the sueccss of Miley's girl didn't get to see Hannah Mon show. 17te Office and (gasp!) Grey;. trouble. Perhap a death tltreat. Heroes script in which cheerleader tana." Anatomy wi ll run out by January I'm not sure yet. Claire (H ayden Panettiere) breaks assembly line and rendered thou or February. Meanwhile, J.D.'s friendlco her neck repeatedly out of bore sands of coupes and trucks. 'It's one thing to have an angxy Spring "We've hunkered down for a worker Thrk argues 'vith his fiance dom. Compared to assembling steen fan demanding tickets. It's long one," said Nick Counter, Carla and makes a pun calling Back in New York, artist combustible 1940's engines, the chief negotiator for the Hollywood attention to his African American Isaac (Santiago Cabrera) creates a upkeep of television is easy. another to have an angcy soccer mom producer's union. "At some point ism. painting that tells of a future that 's To all the studio heads: whose 12-year--<>ld daughter didn't get conversations wi ll take place. But A turning point in the episode already happened. Several nearl>y please consider this offer. 1 not now." comes right before the second characters stare at the artwork \vith Remember: shows like I to see Hannah Montana. The Writers Guild ofAmerica commen:ial break, when Dr. Cox smug self-satisfaction, whispering Love New York make scripts last struck in 1988 for 22 weeks offers sarcastic marital advice to for cheap, dramatic effect. mass-produced by an amateur -Anonymous Entertainment and cost the movie and television the emotionally languishing Turk. For a cliff-hanging conclu look like Shakespeare. industries more than $500 million. Industry Source Dr. Cox: Well (insen girl' sion, I introduce a ·~ero" that - If this proposal becomes real This unfortunate develop name), although my wife's voice unlike the other characters - pos ity, I could easily win an Emmy. ment leuves the downtrodden. sends a ghostly chill up my spine sesses the supernatural ability to If I'm not mistaking, that 's multimillionaire studio heads on ly that often causes my testicles to speak in dialogue not ridden with something Shakespeare never did. one option to fi ll television sched burrow inside myself, I always try clichC. ules: Reality TV. to tell her exactly how I feel. If To keep 12-hour mnmthons she behaves like tl1 e Angel of ofKid Nation off television, I offer Deatl1, I let her know. a sen ibl e solution to the net· Turk: So, I should just be works: honest? Myself. ,, Dr. Co : Gee golly (insen ui£\J.l}..'~ 1 chum out severn! TV scripts different girl's name), you catch .J":_.!r S•"''"'" t,. dt•"" \ 1{ • • • a day and am classically tmined in on quick. u,.tv•rsttY • be COO the art of television writing. Thrk: TI1anks Dr. Cox. Be (l gmdunted Su mma Cum S uea
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