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No. 803 Friday 20th May 1988

INSIDE Bridge in troubled water

Students are still in the dark over the suspension of the Union Snack emergency motion, proposed by 4 Union and Bar staff and over the position of Deputy President Alan Rose, Chris Martin and opposed by the ICU President, concerned the position of following yesterday's AGM. The Union Executive gave a limited ,the Deputy President, Mr Alan Rose, Letter from explanation of the crisis, but were not able to disclose full details. who has been relieved of his The meeting was opened to an this year's ICU Honorary Secretary, management responsibility for the St Mary's audience of around 200 students at for his work as last year's ICU trading outlets. The motion called on 1.05pm yesterday in the Union Publicity Officer and Hon Sec. the Executive to explain why they Concert Hall. It was decided that Quentin Fontana was also given a took the action regarding Mr Rose 5 Libel and awards should be handed out to their UGA for his work as ICU Honorary and to present any evidence they had various recipients before the rest of Secretary two years ago. Mr Fontana regarding his alledged 'gross Blackmail the business was dealt with. is no longer a student at Imperial and misconduct'. It also called for an open The first awards to be made were was not awarded a UGA by Carl debate on the matter. After speeches ICU Social Colours to members of Burgess, the ICU President two years from both sides, the motion was Science College staff. Prof D Ewing and ago. Mr Harbour-Bridge said that he passed. 6 Vernon McClure received their wished to make this retrospective At the end of several minutes awards for their work on academic award because he believed that Mr discussion of whether the action Back in the affairs; Patrick the Beit Quadrangle Fontana had 'held the student union should be debated, Mr Harbour- 7 Messenger for his work as a together at that time'. Bridge agreed to answer questions messenger; Adrian Johnson for his Mr Chas Brereton was awarded the from the floor. SAO work as Union Bar Manager; Reggie third UGA for his work on Academic When Mr Martin asked why the Blennerhassett for his work as Union Affairs this year and in view of the Deputy President had been relieved Accountant; and Sashi Patel for his large sums of money he has raised in of his responsibilities, the meeting 8 Dennis work in the Wages Office. the past three years for Rag. was again interrupted by several After this. Imperial College Union Mr David Clements was awarded procedural motions from the floor and Gabor President Sydney Harbour-Bridge his UGA for his work with Debating heated discussion on the conduct of announced that a new ICU award was Society, Science Fiction Society, the all four sabbaticals. to be given by the ICU Executive for Royal College of Science Union and Mr Harbour-Bridge was asked to 10 Previews outstanding service to the Union in work as ICU Social Clubs Committee give exact figures for the lost revenue any one year. John Noble and Ian Chairman this year. from the Union Snack Bar. He said Morris were awarded an ICU The penultimate UGA went to that projected profits of £35,000 Outstanding Service Award for their College Secretary Mr John Smith for (calculated by assuming that the stock 11 Reviews work on Entertainments; Nigel Baker the support that he has given Imperial that had been purchased had been for his work on Rag; Chas Brereton College Union over the time he has sold) had 'disappeared', and that the for his work on Academic Affairs; been at IC and for the amount of Snack Bar had actually made a trading 12 Sport Mark Harris for his general help money he has made available to the loss of £10,000 during this academic around the Union Office; Rob Kelly Union this year. year. He added that last year's trading for his work last year; Dr Ken Weale The final UGA was awarded to deficit had been £3,000. for his work as ICU Honorary Senior Union Administrator Mrs Jen Hardy Mr Rose stated that he believed that 13 Clubs Treasurer; Chris Martin for his work Smith who Mr Harbour-Bridge decisions made by the Executive two on Publications Board and transport; described as the 'most deserving weeks ago had been based on opinions and Kevin O'Connor for his work on case'. He said that he believed it was and not facts. Again the floor asked accommodation. 14 Diary time to make this award to Mrs Hardy for clarification of the accusation of The final awards to be made at the Smith after the many years service she 'gross mismanagement' which had meeting were the Union General had put into the Union. been levelled against Mr Rose by the 15 Letters Awards (UGA), given by the Union Following the award ceremony, a Executive. Not much was President for service to the Union procedural motion was passed which forthcoming. over a sustained period. The first brought the emergency motions to the UGA was awarded to Chas Jackson, top of the agenda. The first continued on back page THE NEWSPAPER OF IMPERIAL COLLEGE UNION F1 EE LI the course, but it's especially galling But I'm afraid she has her reasons. with the FELIX Editor. when there was at least one item of There aren't many Council members But in one way or another Ian business that needed as much who were also Union officers last Howgate has left his mark on the (t-7— — -J- discussion as time and/or legal year, but those who were will have Union this year. What I find more considerations would allow. difficulty forgetting Howgate's worrying is that his term of office is Hopefully the Union as a whole will continual interruptions. Whatever the having a knock-on effect on FELIX be given a full account of the major subject, he would hold forth as long as well. He's a hard worker, he's thin It occured to me today that perhaps trading imbalances in the Bar and as his lungs would hold out. Now it's skinned, and his other great I was getting a little too involved with Snack Bar when the matter has been probably expecting too much of characteristic is an endless capacity the 'Snack Bar saga". Certainly this resolved. The only thing which came anyone who seeks public office to be for self-deception. This is what is week, with the bitter feuding on both out of yesterday's hot air session was shy and retiring, but there's another rubbing off on those people who like sides, I have found myself slipping that among the mightier members of side to this: if you put yourself in the to take his point of view. FELIX may further and further towards the 'Snack this shitty students union there are public eye, you have to be prepared not like Ian Howgate, but Ian decided Bar staff side'. I no longer feel able some personal grudges which run to take the flack, and this is where long ago that he did not like FELIX. to comment independently on the very deep indeed. Howgate falls down. He stormed out If the Ian Howgate hate campaign of Council on more than one occasion exists it exists chiefly in the mind of events in the Union and the shambles And the biggest personality clash last year and he withdrew from the Ian Howgate, and in the mind of of an Annual General Meeting we had of all? Ian and Alan may not be best Presidential election first time round anyone else he can seduce. FELIX yesterday. of friends anymore, but it's Howgate just because a few people made it always gets a good shelling but this It is for this reason that I have asked versus Hackney which has been at the clear they did not want him in the job. year it seems to have escalated into last year's FELIX Editor David forefront of Union in-fighting for It was Ian Howgate that stormed into a bombardment fed by paranoia. This Jones, who was also present at the most of the year. the FELIX office during the elections is a shame, because you only have to AGM. to write a guest editorial this Or at least, that is what everyone and demanded that Judith (then VP of look at yesterday's proceedings to week. seems to think. I've been looking RCSU) immediately round up a group know that, without its newspaper, IC Just before I go, I'd like to say a through this year's back issues of of RCS students who had chosen to Union is a festering heap of big thank you to the five people who FELIX recently, and there really isn't steal his posters. It was Ian Howgate egomaniacs. On top of his other turned up to collate last night and much evidence of the anti-Howgate that made known his view that the qualities, Ian has a gift for putting everybody who has rallied around me hate campaign. There are one or two Union President should have the right across flawed opinions and being this week. I love you all. editorials which betray some personal to censor FELIX. It was Ian Howgate believed. This is not a situation dislike for the Union President, but that tried to amend the sabbatical job without precedent, but only hardly anything in the rest of the descriptions so that all the posts were Presidents such as Carl Burgess have paper. Nothing, certainly, to rival the subservient to the President. ('But dared to suggest that they should classic FELICes of Steve Marshall I suppose it was just one IC UGM too why, Ian?'—'Because I'm the control FELIX. From Beit Arch to the (1980-81) or even those of Pallab many. Like the compulsive gambler President.' Well, bugger me). It's not central staircase, an iron curtain has Ghosh (1983-84) at his most vitriolic. who puts his last pound on the 33:1 surprising that he doesn't hit it off fallen across IC Union. shot but knows in his heart that he's Now Ian Howgate is an interesting pouring money away, or the alcoholic character. I first met him in early who can't put the glass down though October 1983, when his chief Editor-in-chief Judith Hackney he knows it's killing him, somehow interests were playing Dungeons & Guest Editorial by David Jones I believed this one might be different. Dragons and trying to get laid. He Business Manager Chris Martin What kind of a fool am I? rose from obscurity in the year before Reviews Editors Andrew Clarke and Sumit Guha After a close involvement with his election as President when leading Clubs Editor Andrew Waller FELIX and the Union, it has been the crusade for better security in Sports Editors Dominic Strowbridge disconcerting to have to watch the College residences. In this, and and 'Hector' Sullivan goings on inside Beit Quad as an indeed in much of his work as Union Science Editor... Steve Black President, he has worked very outsider. Perhaps that change of Features Editor Kamala Sen conscientiously and with the best perspective has been significant, but Typesetting Rose Atkins interests of IC students uppermost in this year the Union seems to have Printing Dean Vaughan hauled itself onto a new level of his mind. He has certainly been one Contributors: Paul Shanley, Andrew Waller, Chris Martin, Pippa collective absurdity. Hands up if you of the most committed of Presidents Salmon, Adrian Bourne, Kamala Sen, William Lumb, Matthew Salter, agree with the people from St Mary's. in recent years, and if Judith has been Neil Motteram, Delator, Chris Jones, Steve Black, Sumit Guha, And those who disagree. That's a far unfair to him, then I think it has been Andrew Clarke, Sunny Bains, Murray Williamson, Yishu Nanda, L smaller number.... in not drawing attention to his Patsiolou, K Yamalidon, Chris Stapleton, Roy, Dominic Strowbridge, dilligence whilst mocking his The crass behaviour of all but the Noel Curry and all the collators. eccentricities. most level-headed students is par for

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2 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX News

Con Man Guilds handover Guilds back at Awards

City & Guilds President Dave Tyler Imperial 3MM has awarded five City & Guilds Union General Awards this year. The awards went to Murray Williamson again for his personal help to the President and outstanding work with C&G Entertainments; Alan Hepper for his personal help to the President and outstanding work as Honorary The con man who tries to persuade Secretary; Chris Home for his general students to 'lend" him money, so that 'If- help and Ken Pendlebury for his work he can 'return to France urgently' is in revitalising Hoverclub and help back in College after six months. The around the Union Office. Second man poses as an Air France steward Lieutenant Tyler also awarded called Benoit and drives a white Fiat himself a C&G UGA for his work as registration number D166 ALP. President. Earlier this week an Imperial student was approached by 'M Benoit' and asked for money. The student refused to cooperate, having read about the con man in FELIX last Mugging December. The City & Guilds Union Handover Anyone approached by strangers General Meeting was held on A lady cleaner was mugged in an asking for money should contact the Tuesday on the steps of the Albert alley by the side of the Union Building College Security Office (extension Memorial. Events included the last Friday morning. The attack took 3371): they are advised not to part Trouserless Boatrace between this Student dies place in broad daylight at about with any money. year's and next year's C&GU 10.00am and the woman was robbed Executive. of £40. The man was middle aged and A second year Materials Science around 5ft lOin tall. student died on Sunday after falling from a top floor window in Bernard BOOKNOW Sunley House, Evelyn Gardens, at 2am. The inquest into his death has been ajourned and his funeral will MDH or summer may pass take place today in Coventry. you by.... closure mm College administration have AH Athens i announced that the Main Dining Hall Istanbul 0 i Canadian in the Sherfield Building will be Milan i refurbished during the summer vacation. The work will include the Pans i installation of completely new kitchen Tel Aviv £ reception and servery equipment, a new ceiling, Bangkok it lighting and furniture, and general Delhr £ Imperial students planning to study at redecoration. They have also Hong Kong £. a Canadian university next academic designed a new servery and cash till Los Angeles ° £ year will be able to attend a reception layout to reduce queueing times. New York £ at Canada House next month. The MDH will be closed from July At the reception, the students will 11 until mid-September for the work but there will be restricted access Enquiries & Bookings meet Canadian students who are 01 581 ! 022 Intercontinental HH on enrolled at British universities, as well from May 23. 01 581 8233 European mmm ^1 as Canadian government officials. There will also be other valuable ULU Travel information about Canada available. Sherfield Building For further information and an lan's dodgy tips SW7 invitation to the reception, students Imperial College, should write to Doris Fletcher, British 1/1 Students Reception, CUS/La Societe, Alberta House, 1 Mount Street, KELSO 2.00 The Anti-Christ London Wl Y5AA. Wincanton 3.45 Goodbye Sydney I ii is- ULU TRAVEL The reception will be held on June Ayr 3.45 Lack of colours 28 at Canada House, Trafalgar Square.

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 3 I LJ nio

Steve Gosling (Bo), Dave Hobbs Smith (Hoverclub), Richard (M/C). Adrian Bourne (M/C), James Hardiman (Union), Kevin Humphries Money for City & Wilson (President), Ian Morris (VP), Richard Spencer (Union, (Ents), John Coward (Rugby), Mark President), Andrew Rogers (Union), Maddalena (Rugby), Rich Molloy Richard Barnford (M/C), Peter old rubbish Guilds News (Rugby), Steve Holden (Rugby), Fordham (VP). Steve Ashen (Rugby, Union). Staff City & Guilds Union have awarded Staff Peter Thatcher, Brian Evans, Colin An ecologically-minded student is the following colours: Paul Ewing, Alex Noorbhai, George Rogers, Chris Jerrard. being sought for a summer research Tindall, Shaun Crofton. project into waste paper recycling, Full Colours being set up by Steve Easterbrook and Dave Tyler (Union), Tanya Maule Half Colours RAPE Dr Richard Murphy. The project is (Union, President), Alan Hepper John Noble (Ents), Mike Foulds ALARMS to investigate how to organise (Union, President), Rebecca Hunt (Ents), Wendy Moss (Chem Eng collection of paper from all over (Union. President), David Hudson Soc), Mark Putt (M/C), Paul Bullen are still available College and will run for eight weeks (Union), Bill Goodwin (Union), (Union), Nigel Baker (VP), Max over the summer vacation. The Ralph Greenwell (Union, LMS), Sean Kallios (VP), Hal Calamvokis (VP), to any Imperial project will be funded by UK2000, Dixon (Union, LMS), Colin Trotman Alison Dewey (Union, LMS), Sarah the project headed by Richard (Union), Sarah Cox (Union), Chris Vant (LMS), Dave Osborne (Union, College woman Branson, and supported by Friends of Home (Union), Kev McCann Ents), Amanda Morrison (Ents, Civ the Earth, to provide cash for (Union), Stephen Wells (Union, Eng Soc), Simon Nuttall (Ents), Chris who needs one community efforts to improve the AeroSoc), Phil Chandy (Union, Greenwood (Union, Ents), Owen environment. IC Union have also AeroSoc), Nigel Street (Hoverclub), Jones (Bo), Leo Shapiro (Mech Eng from the IC offered to provide some funding and Rachel Fowler (Union, Civ Eng Soc), Soc), Margaret Vaughan (Mech Eng office space. Chris Cliff (Union, Civ Eng Soc), Soc), Matt Holmes (Rugby), Peter Union Office in There are a number of problems Ken Pendlebury (Union), Jon Stout Lewyckyj (Rugby), Shawn Forrestal Beit Quadrangle. associated with collecting paper for (Union), Ed Daniels (Union), Amin (Rugby), Pete Johnston (Rugby), recycling which will need to be El-Kholy (Union), Murray Miles Bennett (Rugby), Gehan De FREE investigated in this project. One of the Williamson (Union, Bo), Tim Clark Silva Wijeyeratne (Union, Civ Eng most obvious, which has dogged (Union, Bo), Phillipa Hogben (Bo), Soc), Ian Cowly (Aero Soc), Neil previous attempts is where to store the paper, and how the fire risk can be visualise the tiny cogs whirring as fact overcome. It is hoped that a deal can upon fact is digested with a sense of be negotiated with a waste paper purpose usually reserved for dealer to provide fire-proofing as Letter from international money dealers. necessary. Other problems include It is now that the individual who has how best to sort the paper as certain ignored the tutorials throughout the grades of paper are worth more than St Mary's year starts appearing and asking for others, and how to encourage people extra work. This is partly to improve to collect their waste paper. their style and accuracy, but is also The results of the project will be (and probably more importantly) to presented in a written report which see if the tutor will drop any half-hint can then be circulated to other that can be acted upon. Such rumours colleges and institutions to encourage Life is very sombre at the moment. spread around with the speed of a well them to set up their own paper Rag Fete There is little fun to be had in the pre- fanned bush fire, so that by the end recycling schemes. clinical years. The project of the grim of this week almost every subject Anyone interested in earning some reaper has scared many a first year individual will have been spotted! money over the summer while into frantic work,-and reminded the Mounds and mounds of paper have remaining ideologically sound should The totals for the individual stalls of second years of lost time. Talk is full been destroyed and countless pens contact either Dr Richard Murphy Rag Fete are as follows: of hints dropped by the teaching staff discarded. One individual used a (Dept of Pure & Applied Biology) or Mud Wrestling £30.50 in tutorials and lectures. whole pad (200 sheets) of A4 in a Steve Easterbrook (Dept of SciFi Soc Videos £9.70 This is the time the 'spotter kings' week (using both sides and no waste). Computing). Books & Rag Stall £55.63 (or queens) make a mark. Carefully This feat gains even more credibility RCSU Pimms Stall £29.75 picking their way through the when one remembers that there are CU Balloon Throwing £11.93 minefield of summer exams, they few if any formulae or calculations Stocks £45.80 examine each topic for the probability required, as most of the work is in FoppSoc Pig Roast £95.80 of appearing in the paper. Success can essay form. Raffle £137.40 be stunning, for example last year in The ironic thing is that most of this Tombola £12.00 one paper (and I stress only one work is of no practical use for the Chaps' Curries £31.38 paper) an individual spotted 20 out of future, simply a way to pass the 1st Jez Rides £27.51 21 questions. Unfortunately such a or 2nd MB. To work so hard and IC Radio £3.47 dazzling performance occurs only amass so much information—each Guilds Rugby Fruit Machinefl 1.69 once. subject doubles the vocabulary, just Coconut Shy £30.51 Probably the funniest sight of the to pass a single set of exams and then Guilds Flanning £0.95 day is the race to the library after the forget most of it strikes me as one of Queens Tower £183.91 first lecture! Unless you are at the the biggest wastes of time ever ICCAG Burgers £80.78 front your chances of a desk are devised. Those poeple who do well Beetlesoc £2.70 limited. As one walks into the library in 2nd MB do not necessarily make RSM Bottoms £11.30 the atmosphere of concentration is good doctors, so what is the benefit Total £810.81 immediately apparent. One can of it all?

4 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX MY SPIES in College have been pretty scathing about the conduct of a certain newly-appointed Student Accommodation Officer. It seems that biacK/MAiL she has arranged several new clerical jobs in her office but is unconcerned Information required on the following topics: about the lack of College Welfare Advisor following the resignation of The Union has decided to fit a new key system into the Union Building Ms Linda Simmons at the end of to replace the decrepit one now in use. In their infinite wisdom, they March. have chosen the ASSA 6000 series. This was the one installed in Ms Simmons was a well-liked and Linstead Hall over the summer. Why has the Union again chosen an conscientious Welfare Advisor but MY GOOD FRIEND College ASSA system when: only remained at Imperial for six Secretary John Smith, recent recipient Dozens of masters (ie R37s, ES1s, etc) are flying about? months. Why? Close friends tell me of an Imperial College Union General The Linstead 'foolproof system was cracked within eight hours that she was disillusioned and cynical Award, is always so fond of telling of installation? by the time she left. Her main reason us how the Summer Letting Scheme was the lack of support she was keeps term time rents down. Quite Talking of key systems, why has Southwell warden Ken Young been getting from both her colleagues and possibly. But certain figures have expressing an interest in obtaining a particular key? He asked one of Imperial College Union. been passed in my direction. my spies if he could gain entry to Sherfield Level Four Finance. Why? The Student Accommodation Hamlet Gardens is a head tenancy Office seems to be in a bit of a turmoil down in Hammersmith. Students are How many keys has College Chief Security Office Geoff Reeves at the moment. Student charged either £33 or £36 per week received since he declared an amnesty on illegal key-holders? Accommodation Officer Loretto depending on which block they are O'Callaghan is convinced that the living in. This figure is zero-rated for Following my question a few weeks back, I can now reveal that office will not be running smoothly VAT during term because it is a Union Administrator Jen Hardy-Smith was responsible for the Union until next year. The question on many student residence. It does not include reorganisation. She even drew up the 'white paper' for the scheme. people's lips now is why, at the height gas or electricity. If Mrs Hardy-Smith is pulling the strings in the Union, then presumably of exam time and two months after However, during the Summer Mr Harbour-Bridge is Pinnochio, the lying puppet who broke free. Ms Simmons left, has her job not Letting Scheme, the same flats are let been advertised? And why doesn't out at £34pw for the first four weeks Life Sciences had a first-year intake of 140 students at the start Imperial College Union push for the and then £28pw after that. This of this year as opposed to a planned 100. A source of mine within post to be filled now? includes VAT at 15 % for the first four the department has told me that it is intended to raise the pass mark Sources close to the SAO have weeks and 3% after that. My in order to fail more students. This would bring the size of the year speculated that it could be because calculator reckons that the zero-rated down to a manageable level. Can the head of department refute this? Union sabbaticals don't need welfare VAT is therefore about £27pw. This advice—but they do need jobs as figure is inclusive of gas and Al Birch, Falmouth Keogh Assistant Subwarden informs me that subwardens next year! electricity bills. At an average of The Players were indeed at Rag Fete and threw a deck of cards off £4.50pw for gas and electricity this the top of the Queen's Tower. Funny how no one else saw it, eh, Al? means that College is getting about Is Mr Birch trying to shift attention away from himself? Could it FORMER RCSU HON SEC Tom £22.50pw during the summer. be that The Players weren't at Rag Fete because one of them was Melliar-Smith was seen wandering It doesn't take a degree in in Cambridge at the time, ie Mr Birch himself? haplessly in the direction of the Union Mathematics to see that £22.50 is Building last Wednesday night. The considerably less than the average RCS tramp Tony Spencer wrote in to deny last week's story man had gone for a drink in the £34.50 that students are being concerning his leaking of information to Delator. However as I pointed Holland Club. The poor souls who charged. out at the time, Mr Spencer is on Delator's 'unreliable information' had to suffer Mr Melliar-Smith's Why are students subsidising list. Consequently I don't believe a word he says. tedious monologue got extremely summer residents? On this subject, a third source within Guilds has refused to deny bored by this and took action. A my allegation that a slush fund exists. phone call was soon arranged calling COMRADE HOWGATE has the man to the Union for 'an urgent message'. Mr Melliar-Smith has not been confiding to close 'friends', A certain Hall/House Warden applied for the wardenship with 'his been back to the Holland Club since. notably Mr Martyn Peck, FELIX spy, wife'. Why does his wife and kid(s) have a different surname to him? that he may find himself in academic Could it be that they're not really married? trouble next year. Hissing Syd is apparently not guaranteed of a place Two items marked 'confidential' were discussed at Monday night's AT THURSDAY'S AGM. Mr in College next year. Will this Council. Why were they debated in an open session with observers Howgate deferred one of his endanger his master plan to get present? Outstanding Service Awards at the elected as Union President for the end of the meeting. The prospective second time, at the end of next year? Last week's Blackmail: recipient was Phil Drew, St Mary's 1) The Union Officer who shaved all his pubes off in a third year President. Mr Drew was so angered English lesson was External Affairs Officer, Mr Neil Motteram. by the direction the meeting was THERE WERE some very weird going that he walked out. taking all proxies flying about at Council on 2) The second year Aeronautics student who makes Mars Bars his Exec with him. He also stated that Monday night. It seemed that people disappear when his girlfriend is about is Mr Jan Graham. his Union would not be merging with were running about College all day, ours until such a time as ICU got their desperately making phone calls in a This week's Blackmail: act together. bid to have a vote. One member 1) Five pounds from the Phantom Soaker or I reveal his name. present, however, went out of his way 2) Five pounds from Mr Harbour-Bridge or I publish 'confidential' Needless to say, Mr Drew did not to ensure he was there. He actually details of the local council elections and the bowling alley. receive his award. bought his proxy for £2—a proxy 3) Which male Union Officer has recently contracted syphillis? belonging to someone whom he had Delator. met only once before in his life. P.S. Thanks Mr Northey for the £5. Chris Jones

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 5 Eating Rocks UNDER THE Editorial:

Precious metals, such as Gold or MICROSiSCOPE Science and Platinum, are so expensive that they are worth extracting from rocks that by Steve Black contain only tiny amounts of them: 5 the Heretic grams of Gold per tonne of extracted rock is not uncommon. Sometimes this tiny amount of precious material In most fields of human endeavour the is easy to extract: metallic gold is Spaghetti Universe heretic is an unwelcome distraction. heavier than most rocks so Not so in science: there, the heretic sophisticated large-scale versions of Astronomy's latest fad is the cosmic distorted in such a way that if you is an absolute necessity. Not that you panning can be used to separate it (in string. As is typical for such fads, travelled in a circular path around would know that by looking at the a fast-flowing stream of water the cosmic strings are being used to one, you would not have travelled a way they are treated by the least dense bits get washed away explain every piece of anomalous full 360°. Such odd objects in various establishment. For example, when before the heavier bits). However, in information available to astronomers. incarnations (including massive Rupert Sheldrake's heretical work A some precious-metal ores the valuable In particular, they have recently been strings which weigh a lot, New Science Of Life first appeared, bits are much more difficult to invoked to explain why the observed superconducting strings and loops of the editor of Nature suggested that it extract. About 30% of all Gold is universe is lumpy. string) have been invoked to explain should be burnt in public. It may well found in rocks made from sulphide First let's look at the observed anomalies such as the great attractor be that the book was full of nonsense, minerals and these tend to hold on to facts. In the last few years and the inhomogeneous nature of the but Sheldrake stuck to the rules of about one third of their Gold content astronomers have concluded that there universe. They are now even being science and suggested how his ideas (even when harsh chemical methods are huge holes in space between used to explain the origins of galaxies could be tested. are used to try to get it out). A clusters of galaxies. This was themselves. In responding to his challenge, Canadian mining company has unexpected and is, apparently, Cosmic strings were, according to many biologists will have been forced recently proposed a new method that difficult to explain given conventional the people who champion their to think afresh about the fundamentals promises to get almost all the Gold assumptions about the origin of the existence, formed in the very early of their subject. This will have kept from sulphide rocks. The method universe and the formation of stages of the Big Bang and have them intellectually alert. The more involves eating the rock. galaxies. More recently a group of permeated the universe in a sort of you close your mind to new ideas, the While eating rock (even the sort astronomers known as the seven cosmic Spaghetti ever since. As more stodgy your own ideas become. you get with 'Welcome to Blackpool' samurai have uncovered some other clouds of dust and gas flowed past Strict adherence to the conventional written the whole way through it) is related awkward facts about the them in the chaos of the early universe is a sure path towards intellectual not good for people, there are some motion of some nearby galaxies. the clouds were condensed into thin stagnation. bugs that just love it. One particular Their observations show that our sheets (this is a result of the distortion Recently New Scientist opened its bacterium, Thiobacillus Ferridoxans, neighbouring galaxies are being of space around the string). These pages to another biological heretic: gets its energy by 'burning' the pulled by some mysterious object sheets were condensed enough to Peter Duesberg, who believes that sulphide ores into sulphates (sulphates called the Great Attractor (which is form into galaxies and clusters of HIV is not the cause of AIDS. He are derived from sulphides by adding about 200 million light years away in galaxies whose distribution will believes that the virus is benign and oxygen—thereby releasing lots of the direction of the southern cross, therefore be very uneven. One that AIDS is simply a product of a energy). This makes the rock more turn left at Betelgeuse). This attraction interesting (and testable) prediction sexually degenerate lifestyle. soluble and breaks down its was discovered by subtracting the from this model is that the distribution Duesberg's ideas were ignored by the impermeable and dense structure, expected velocities (resulting from the of galaxies is more like a sponge than establishment when he first published making it much easier to extract the attraction due to the known galactic a foam (a foam has lots of completely them, but this only encouraged him precious components. lumps) from the actual velocities enclosed bubbles but a sponge has and his supporters in the press. (measured by red shifts). However, The only problem involved results only one interconnecting but very New Scientist took a more the quality of this sort of data is from the amout of heat produced complicated hole surrounding a single reasonable approach: they allowed questionable (and often questioned) during the digestion: the bacteria have piece of matter). Duesberg two pages to put forward since it relies on incomplete galactic to be kept at 30 °C but this requires It will be worth waiting for the his ideas and then gave someone else surveys. a large amount of cooling and a large observations to sort these ideas out, the same amount of space to refute vat to hold the soup while the bugs Astro-theorists are never slow to but it will be even more fun to see them. Duesberg's opponent admitted do their work. The extra Gold jump on the bandwagon, even if it is what the theoreticians can dream up that he had to think again about the recovered makes it worthwhile. based only on dud observations. So next: a cosmic reef-knot perhaps? basic evidence when confronted with Meanwhile, British biotech- cosmic strings have been invoked to the heresy, but the rethink only nologists are working on some other explain some of the anomalous facts. reinforced his own beliefs. He won bugs that work at much higher Strings already existed in the minds the argument convincingly. temperatures and would therefore of the Alice-in-Wonderland theorists This is the way all scientific debate require smaller vats and less cooling. who like to publish six impossible should be conducted. Heretics are a These might be useful in things before breakfast, but until these valuable spur to new thought and if circumstances where the expense of recent observations they had no facts their ideas are wrong then open public the Canadian bugs would not be that could be usefully explained by debate is a better way to prove them justified. Perhaps this unusual them. wrong than suppression. Anyway, application of designer-bugs to What the strings are is difficult to sometimes the heretics are right and geology is a sign that biotechnology comprehend (though I welcome any conventional science just holds back is, at last, starting to do something attempts by physicists to explain them progress by ignoring them. useful with all the money that has more thoroughly on these pages). gone into it. Basically, they can be thought of as one-dimensional defects in the fabric of space. Space near a string is

6 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX maintain booking charts ensuring full occupancy where possible, collect rents, operate the accounting system and supervise the cleaners. The cleaners clean rooms, change sheets Jobs for the boysand ac t as porters. Hamlet Gardens (and the girls!)A t Hamlet Gardens three assistant managers and two full time cleaners run about 50 flats which provide The schemes fall into two distinct Managers, Night Managers, accommodation for about 200 guests. During the Summer categories. The Summer Accom- Cashiers/Receptionists. The reception The duties are similar to those at modation Centre operates in Linstead desk is manned day and night Evelyn Gardens. These flats provide vacation many of Hall and part of Southside, providing throughout the Summer vacation. accommodation of a basic standard. hotel standard bed and breakfast Guests are welcomed, registered and the College's service for Conferences and other billed on arrival by the reception team residences are let to short stay visitors. This is run under and shown to their rooms by a porter. the auspices of the Conference Office. Behind the scenes, the cleaners Beit Hall The Summer Letting Schemes include prepare up to 460 rooms which visitors from Evelyn Gardens, Hamlet Gardens and involves changing and making beds, Beit Hall is different from the other Beit Hall, providing a more basic and cleaning wash basins and bathrooms schemes in a number of ways. It is outside the College. less expensive form of and vacuuming carpets. All this has much smaller with only 100 rooms accommodation. The clientele tends to be done in the morning in four and the Housekeeper is heavily The income from to be students from other Colleges hours. Cleaners work in pairs, under involved with the lettings. The Beit staying for fairly long periods. These the supervision of the Housekeeper Hall scheme operates with one these schemes is schemes are run by the Student and coordinator, serving 24 rooms assistant manager, one night manager Accommodation Office. For all the and three sets of bathroom facilities and three cleaners. The assistant essential if schemes marketing is carried out on a staircase. There will also be a manager is responsible for raising all centrally, but during the residence demand for extra cleaners for between invoices and making sure that guests reasonable rents in period most of the work of running 7 and 14 days at the start and for pay on time and also acts as an and maintaining the scheme is carried cleaners to work weekends only. assistant to the Housekeeper. the residences are out by students on site. However accommodation will not be provided for these two categories. to be maintained. Coordinators receive a £10 per week Summer Accommodation responsibility payment in addition to The various the above rate. The hours given for Centre (SAC) Evelyn Gardens cleaners and coordinators represent a Summer Letting guaranteed minimum; it is possible This is the most prestigious of the four This is the largest of the schemes that overtime will sometimes be Schemes offer a schemes and has a relatively large operated by the Student available. The hours given for other work force necessary to maintain the Accommodation Office, and is staffed staff represent normal hours, but there number of jobs for very high standards required. The by four assistant managers and nine will be times when extra hours are office and reception desk is in the cleaners. All three schemes are required. Although overtime is not the vacation period. foyer of Linstead Hall and is run by however supervised by a paid for these extra hours they will a member of the Conference Office Coordinator. The assistant managers be taken into account when assessing These vary from staff, together with Assistant run the office, act as receptionists, bonuses. The Summer Letting Schemes offer challenging full- an intersting and rewarding kind of time managerial vacation work. At times the work is Renumeration very hard, especially at the beginning and end of the schemes. Those posts to part-time All students who work in the Summer accommodation, and are eligible for working in the management type jobs Lettings Schemes are offered a a discretionary bonus. Wages, hours need a lot of stamina and patience to cleaning work. In competitive wage. Those who work and bonus rates are as follows: deal with large numbers of guests for the whole summer are offered free while working under considerable general the work is pressure. At the same time most people who work on the scheme tend well paid and Position No of Hours Wages Bonus to enjoy themselves as well as gaining interesting; free useful work experience. Please note Assistant Managers 39 £100 pw £100-300 that in general all staff working in the schemes must be prepared to cover accommodation is Night Manager 35 £80.50 £100-300 any emergencies that arise. Application forms are available provided in most Receptionist 35 ill £70-200 from the Student Accommodation Cleaners and Cleaning 24 £2.10 ph £30-100 Office, 15 Princes Gardens, or Room cases. 170 Sherfield Building. Coordinators The Closing date is Friday May 27, 2.30pm.

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 7 f^eertLi res DENNIS GABOR: IMPERIAL ENGINEER AND FATHER OF HOLOGRAPHY

Dennis Gabor was born in Hungary where he began to settle down until seminar on Statistical Mechanics Dennis Gabor, the at the turn of the century into a strong the third year when he was called up which I had under Einstein's guidance engineering family, although his for military service. Eager to escape in 1921-22. " world famous father never went to university. From the army, he moved to the Technisher an early age the combination of Hochschule in Berlin to persue an Gabor finished his first degree in inventor of Dennis' own intellect and the Electrical Engineering degree: 1924 and went on to complete a Dr- education provided by his father, Ing in 1927. He then joined the holography, spent Bertalan, gave him more knowledge "Though still at its height at the Physics Laboratory at Siemens but of physics and mathematics than his time, I could not call the TH Berlin when Hitler came to power his several years teachers. He and his two brothers an ideal institution. There were far contract was not renewed and he were given all the books and too many students and there was returned to Hungary where he worked working at Imperial laboratory equipment they needed to hardly any contact between students on the development of a plasma lamp. excel in both the experimental and and teachers. It was a sort of slot In 1934, through Edward Allibone, College. theoretical sides of physics. Through machine into which one had to throw who was to become a lifelong friend, the family, Dennis learned to speak no end of machine designs, essays and he came to Britain. For 15 years he International good German, French and English, papers and out came a diploma in the worked for the British Thomas as well as his native Hungarian. end. But it certainly made one get Houston Company. His work at BTH publisher and At school he was often bored by the used to hard work! My real education, was, to begin with, largely based on work, which he found too easy, and and the memory which I cherish mostth e development of the plasma lamp. holography was unpopular with teachers. He went at that time, was the Physical When this project was eventually on to study mechanical engineering at Colloquium at the University, every found to be unworkable, he was given enthusiast Sunny the Technical University of Budapest Tuesday, and the unforgettable a staff position at the company. With the onset of the war he found himself Bains takes a look very restricted in his potential fields of research as he was classed an at the life of Gabor 'enemy alien' by the British government. For this reason he was and his scientific not allowed to take part in any project even vaguely involved with defence. philosophy. He nevertheless decided to pursue his own research on the detection of airplanes using the heat from their engines and an infrared detecting screen but, when the military found out about it, the project was taken over and he was prevented from working on it further. In 1938, after the advent of television, a worried cinema-chain owner persuaded Gabor to develop some way of projecting cinema pictures in 3-D which he went on to patent in 1940. In 1947, Gabor was trying to solve the problem of aberrations in lenses in electron microscopy. He had the idea of recording the phase information of a beam of light on an intensity sensitive plate by interfering it with a reference beam from the same source, and then replaying it by

8 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX passing light through the Germany for a visit. Of his trip he never taken up since the cathode ray which can only be harmful to me. I photographed image. By mid-1948 he wrote: tube had been shortened by this time. wanted to let you know, in case you had proved that his theory could work In 1956, however, the Sunday Times have an opportunity to rectify false in practise. This was my first visit to Germany found out about the research and impressions. At the end of 1948, Gabor moved since 1933, and it was almost a printed an article on the subject. to Imperial College in London where triumphal entry. I was the guest of Gabor was concerned for his Dennis was appointed to a personal he had been appointed Reader in Gottingen University and of the Max reputation and wrote to Allibone, who Chair of Applied Electron Physics at Electron Physics. In 1956 he wrote Planck Institute, to whom I gave a was now head of the Associated Imperial College in 1958. His that the preceding 6-7 years had been lecture on information theory and Electrical Industries (AEI) research inaugural lecture entitled Electronic the happiest of his scientific career. physics. They gave a dinner in my labs at Aldermaston: Inventions and their Impact on Professor Eric Ash, Rector of honour where I sat between Otto Civilization eventually became the Imperial College, was the first student Hahn and Heisenberg, who treated You may have seen in yesterday's book Inventing the Future. Gabor supervised for a PhD. He In 1958 he started working on a wrote of Gabor: project involving thermo-nuclear fusion, but illness intervened in 1961 There was no doubt amongst his when thrombosis-phlebitis of the legs students that Gabor should win the sent him to hospital which forced him Nobel Prize for something - we to withdraw from the project. debated just what it might be. Nor was In 1962 the AEI research facility at this a symptom of hero worship of Aldermaston closed down. To a which we were largely innocent. We journalist from the Financial Times could assess the magnitude of the he wrote: intellect but found it harder to discern the direction. In fact your personal worries are now part of a very sinister This is, perhaps, hardly surprising. development. Do you know that ICI In this period he designed an are closing down their fundamental interference microscope, started research at Welwyn, and Courtaulds experimental work in plasma are also shutting down fundamental oscillations and did pioneering work research? I am afraid what is in communication theory. happening is nothing less than the end Throughout his life, Gabor was of what can really be called research insistent that he was an engineer and in industry in this country. It is a inventor, rather than a scientist. catastrophic development. When I Perhaps is surprising, then, that he did came to this country 29 years ago and not always like to work with noticed the primitive state of engineers: industrial research as compared with that in Germany, I thought, as most My experience with engineering people did, that it would be different students is that one in two is in a generation, when the people who completely unfit for research, and the had themselves done research when other takes a year before he gets they were young would have risen to going. For this reason I am taking on high management posts. Just the a young physicist; their starting time opposite has happened, it is not the is less, but of course there is always research man who has replaced the the possibility of getting a dud. bluff old production engineer, but the accountant. When doing experimental work, he tended to design an experiment and From 1963, when Leith and then let the research assistants and Upatnieks applied lasers to students get on with it. This left him holography, Gabor's place in history free to go into his office to write. was secured. When in 1971 he won Communication between Gabor the Nobel Prize, Upatnieks sent the and the students was sometimes first telegram congratulating him, and difficult. He often found it difficult in 1972 Leith wrote as part of the to get down to the level of the students introduction to the Nobel Lecture when trying to explain some idea. printed in the proceedings of the Eric Ash wrote: IEEE:

His lecture courses... seemed While Nobel awards are given for memorable but hardly capable of me with more than polite courtesy. Sunday Times a short article 'New TV specific achievements, it nonetheless assimilation - at least, until the These good Germans, whom nobody set will hang on wall', mentioning seems fitting that the recipients of realization dawned that they were notcould ever accuse of nazism, are that I am developing such a tube. I science's highest award should be so much lectures but master classes. pathetically keen on making amends want you to know that I neither truly intellectual giants in the It was necessary to 'know' the subject for the others. inspired this article nor authorised it. broadest sense. On all scores, Dennis before attending these occasions; but Presumably it has been released by Gabor is worthy of this award. then the experience was enormously Between 1952 and 1958, Gabor the National Research Development worthwhile - providing both the long worked on another of his pet projects, Corporation, perhaps in the hope that historical view as well as insight in the thin TV tube which could be used the British valve manufacturers would FELIX acknowledges the assistance depth and generality. for both monochrome and colour. The prick up their ears. For my part I am given by the College Archives and experimental work was, in fact, rather concerned about the article, as Holographies International. In 1956 Gabor went back to successful, but his invention was it could be read as self-advertisement,

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 9 peview

disqualified in Brazil). This reliability hillsides the rest of the time. alone should enable Prost to finish at The fairly subtle sub-plot of father least 2nd in every race and as long as and estranged son being reunited is Adrian he wins a few more he should be not only a touch obvious but very Bourne rX 0T0R 1 world champion for the third time. BOOKS-cliched. In fact the only surprise in Unlike football, where the complete the book is how quickly the characters underdogs can beat a much more come to accept a magical creature in expensive team, Formula One is ruled The Grey Horse their midst. Perhaps the Irish are like Ayrton Senna's mistake 12 laps from almost exclusively by the R A MacAvoy that—I don't know. the flag in last Sunday's Monaco chequebook. The big spenders at the This simple tale of simple Irish folk Despite these complications and Grand Prix, when he crashed into a moment are Honda, Philip Morris turned out to be a little too simple for substructures, the events develop barrier while holding a 50 second (Marlboro) and R J Reynolds my liking. The plot itself is very rather too slowly, perhaps an attempt lead, has given the World (Camel). I say almost exclusively straightforward, a man, Rory by the author to recreate the Championship advantage (both because Lotus are again proving that MacEever, wants to win the heart of, timelessness of the country, which is points-wise and psychologically) to in the modern era they are the big and then marry a young girl, Mary usually claimed by the Irish Tourist his McLaren team mate Alain Prost. losers. Since the death of founder Stanton. Not really the kind of thing Board. The frequent Gaelic references The most successful driver of all Colin Chapman in 1982 Lotus have you might expect of a popular writer I found confusing and distracting and time, Prost won his 30th Grand Prix gone downhill in a big way and much whose works are generally found did little for the authenticity of the and his 4th Monaco victory in the last of the credit for this must go to team amongst the science fiction or fantasy story, a shame since this is no doubt 5 years in a rather unsatisfactory manager Pete Warr. His latest section of bookshops. Well there is the reason for their inclusion. manner. Prost has been out-qualified masterstroke was signing world a little more to the story. Mary is a R A MacAgoy has received several in all 3 Grand Prix this season by champion Nelson Piquet, the arrogant nationalist, the kind of radical awards and nominations for her Senna quite easily and startline Brazilian who has resorted to making protagonist which the South West writing, and I can only assume that mistakes lost him the race at the Imola cheap jibes about other drivers private corner of Ireland might well she has done better in the past. If you and should have cost him victory in lives in Playboy rather than accommodate. The real kick comes like horses and simple tales though, Monte Carlo. Yet the fact is that he concentrate on his (very slow) from Rory though. He is a horse (yes you might like this book. leads Senna by 15 points and driving. He would do Fl a great a grey one), or to be more exact, a The Grey Horse is published today McLaren are yet to suffer a favour if he packed up, shut up and horse fairy who turns into a man on by Bantam, and is £2.95. mechanical retirement (Senna was went home. occasion and gallops around the Andrew Clarke.

Move it into the refridgerator as soon tips on areas of the city where the All the areas that I have mentioned as it has set. good Greek tavernas are to be found. can be reached by bus from the city Cookery Club If you want to make this mousse it centre. It would be a good idea to try is well worth taking the trouble to 1) The castle Greek seafood dishes if you go to a borrow a blender. You will love the The areas around the ancient Roman taverna in an area near the sea, but tangy, slightly sweet, but creamy castle and the village within it offer further inland the 'Souvlaki' (kebab) result that this recipe produces. You an excellent assortment of tavernas meat preparations might be prefered. might like to try substituting where Greek food must be eaten. If raspberries for strawberries. you have any fears of Greek food this The Island of Corfu would be the time to forget them and It might be sensible to avoid Corfu in Former junior Swiss eat like a glutton for you will have a the peak of summer, but if you wrestling champion quits difficult time finding better value food venture this far you certainly must not A Summer festival anywhere else in Europe. You might miss a meal at Georgo's taverna in the Dorchester be lucky enough to find a taverna that Messongi. The Moussaka, the offers a spectacular view of the port Barbouni (red mullet), the 1 always look forward to the Summer The world of food is as much about city from a vantage point in the castle. Massoroonatha do Foumou (oven because strawberries are available in the people who cook in it as it is about baked macaroni cheese) are the abundance to make my favourite the food itself. 2) The Olympus-Naoussa area (city outstanding dishes to be tried. A meal mousse. Anton Mossiman retired recently centre) here will cost a paltry £1.50. from the Dorchester Hotel after Rogottis—This establishment is Dr Toumazou warns that Cyprus Strawberry Mousse heading a posse of 80 chefs for many famous amongst the locals for its juicy will be more expensive than the Greek years. He has opened a restaurant off 'soutzoukakia'. The girls insist that islands but that is never any reason Ingredients: Belgrave Square where he hopes to this local delicacy cannot be missed to miss out on good food. 500g fresh strawberries carry on pleasing the palate. for the world. The places to look out for are: 50g (2oz) caster sugar He is regarded by many as the Taverna Aphrodite, Limassol—The 4 tblsp water finest chef in England since the great The city outskirts Kleftico (leg of lamb) and the V2 pint double cream Escofier. Anton has helped to 'Aphelia' (chunks of meat marinated 2 egg whites promote bread and butter pudding 3) The locality of Krini-Kalamaria in wine) are two masterpieces and from the status of mere stodge to that Close to Krini is the expensive should cost about £3 per head. Method: of a regal pudding. I hope to include luxurious taverna of Krikelas. A meal Taverna Salamis, Ayia Napa—The Puree fruit his recipe for this classic pud in a here would be recommended to those Souvlaki and the Galamari (squid) Dissolve gelatine into water future issue of FELIX. who are prepared to spend between should be tried. Pour gelatine into puree £10-15 per head inclusive of service Blend together and wine. We have come far since leaving the Pour in whisked cream leafy lanes of London but before our Whisk the eggs and blend into the Greece & Cyprus 4) The locality of Nea Mihaniona gastronomic itinerary moves mixture and Epanomi westward I will be giving food tips Set the mousse in the freezer The City of Thessaloniki from Athens and the Aegean islands. compartment 5) The village of Panorama I am indebted to those who provided Here the tavernas offer the much the info that made this article possible. The mousse takes about 2 hours to L Patsiolou and K Yamalidou of loved 'trigono' which must be had as Bye for now, set. Take care not to freeze it solid. Chem Eng were kind enough to give dessert with any meal you might try. Yishu.

10 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX lews JILHi Ironweed It is rare these days to see a truly bad The scene of reconciliation is film. Films cost too much money for actually quite moving but it comes too anyone to risk making a bad one but late in the film (about two hours too Hector Babenco has managed, against late). By that time you are too bored all odds, to achieve just that. His film to care, having sat through what must Ironweed runs for two hours fifteen be the most lengthy exposition in minutes and seems to last twice as cinema history. Babenco seems so long. anxious to show what life was like as The film is set in 1938 in the a tramp that he uses most of the depressed town of Albany NY where running time just to set the scene. The Francis Phelan (Jack Nicholson) and boredom and hopelessness of their his down-and-out friends scrape out lives is conveyed by boring the pants an existence in soup kitchens and off the audience. flophouses, doing odd jobs and The film is based on William drinking liquor. When working as a Kennedy's Pulitzer Prize winning gravedigger he visits for the first time novel of the same name (by the way; the grave of his son, who died at 13 what does Ironweed mean?). But the days when Nicholson accidentally depth of characterisation possible in dropped him on the floor twenty two a novel is not easily transferred to the years previously. The grave starts him screen. After half an hour the thinking about his life before the characters are established and you Gwynne (Herman Munster), Tom good acting could rescue this film accident and about the wife and family wonder when the plot will arrive. An Waits and 60s sex symbol Carrol from the hands of its director. he left because he couldn't face the hour later you are still wondering, the Baker who is no baby doll any more. Ironweed is sad proof of the fact that guilt. From then on the film intervening time seeming very empty She's no actress any more either even Hollywood's finest can come up chronicles the events of the next day because the director fails to express although some of the acting is very with a 151b turkey every now and and half with numerous scenes of life the ideas of the book in filmic terms. good, managing to produce the again. as a hobo and his belated return home Besides two superstars (Nicholson obligatory oscar nomination for Ms Steve Roberts. bearing a 151b turkey as a gift. and Meryl Streep) the cast boasts Fred Streep. Unfortunately no amount of JtUSILU Seventh Son of a Seventh Son The Innocents Blind Iron Maiden Erasure The Icicle Works I've always bought Iron Maiden Given that Erasure's latest album, The Following last year's If You Want to without the recognition and radio play albums because they use Heavy Metal Innocents, is produced by Stephen Defeat Your Enemy, Sing His Song, it deserves. Support a worthy cause, as a medium for presenting interesting Hague, you might expect it to sound comes Blind. Consistently creative, the boys are probably still mourning musical and lyrical ideas, rather than like the 'every-hit's-the-same' yet consistently denied of commercial their team's failed attempt at the FA simply thrashing out rock cliches to Petshop Boys. That sound is certainly success. The Icicle Works continue Cup (no doubt to be featured on the shouted 'blood and guts' lyrics. in evidence, but Vince Clarke's to cut their way through the ever next album). Unfortunately, the latter is a far more catchy formula music is still the increasing volume of dross that finds Brad Blundell. accurate description of their new LP, predominant feature. Vince is good its way onto radio playlists and shops, 7th Son of a 7th Son. Even Derek at what he does, and obviously sees in their gritty scouse way. Blind is a Riggs' usually stunning cover no reason to vary things unduly. blend of styles as diverse as the The Wonderstuff illustrations are lacking, although the Anyone who liked The Circus will go African sounding What Do You Want Marquee, 5th March inner-sleeve is terrific. As with their Me To Do? through to the Prince for this one too. Unlike some gay As usual, The Wonderstuff mix a set last album, synths can now be heard sound-a-like Kiss Off. McNabb still lyricists, Andy Bell has always of loud indie/rock with humour and unobtrusively in the mix, along with reminds us though that he's still written lines which can be identified wit, with the lead singer 'Miles' (!!) sampled choirs on the very long title- listening to his Led Zeppelin and Neil with by both gay and straight people, supplying the intersong chatter. What track, the second half of which Young albums, Shit Ceek sounding although he does slip up in Witch in The Wonderstuff are good at are fast, contains most of the novelty on the particularly like Jimmy Page... a Ditch, albeit in German, which has short pop songs such as their current album. The chorus, however, simply a catchy folk music tune. The other The title track though is without single Give, Give, Give Me More, consists of the title repeated 8 times! non-formula track is 65000, which is doubt the finest track on the album. More, More that are perfect to jump The acoustic guitar ending to The a boring attempt at a house Following on from Up Here in the about to. They will definitely be Prophecy would have come as a instrumental, the packaging is very North a single from ...Enemy..., heading for bigger and better things surprise to people if I hadn't spoilt it. attractive, the music, consistently McNabb sets about telling you in if the following of fans they have and A pity really, as there aren't any other chart-orientated, with numerous under five minutes what's wrong with the media attention they have been surprises. potential singles. Britain/the World in 1988. No doubt, receiving are anything to-go by. Richard Fincher Richard Fincher this record will slip by barely noticed, Mac

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 11 ort BOAT Small Ads Mad Dogs and Belgians Ghent Regatta Notts City Regatta Last weekend, a squad of 11 IC Durham University were found to eat margin. Q1 A red haired electrical oarsmen competed at Ghent their words at Nottingham last Sunday Other wins were achieved in the engineer, mass 10st, height 5'8" International Regatta in Belgium and after racing IC in Elite Coxless Fours. 'special race for extremely slow goes to an IBS seminar. He spots produced some impressive results. 'Don't worry about IC. you beat them double sculls' and 'almost' lightning 4 girls in front of him, he is then Vince Roper competed in open light easily yesterday' their coach was coxless fours. In the latter, yet stressed by 3 letters, considering weight sculls on Saturday—just failing overheard saying before the race in another crew combination was tried him to be sponsored by BEM, to make the final in which the former which (a different IC) were destined (with Porky Roper rowing at 2) and calculate the modulus of frigidity (assume zero mass in the skull). World Gold Medalist came third. On to beat Durham. In a six boat final, the four cruised home to win easily. FF. Sunday. Vince. competing at Under using the infamous wall of water The most exciting win of the 23 level took the silver medal less technique and rating a phenomenal weekend, however, was in the Senior Hunky male stripper offers than a length behind the gold. 147 off the start, the Imperial four 1 fours. Suffering from a weakened services —has own toolbox, but 'After Eights' to be supplied by The lightweight coxless four, had found themselves half a length up on squad after a number of oarsmen were client. Contact Gremlin, Willis a world championship silver medal a bad draw on Saturday and failed to off games (without notes) the crew Jackson House. make the final, being pipped in their winning crew in the adjacent lane. was formed on the day, forcing ICs Win a date with Ken Dolan. heat by the silver medal crew. On (This crew only drew level with a coach, Mad-Dog Mason out of Enter the Garden Hall pool mere 100m of the race left!) However Sunday, however, after a storming retirement and into the technical seat competition. All interested parties first 1000m they led the field and went the important race was against of the boat. In a race that was a cliff contact their psychiatrist on to win the gold over the Scottish Durham who were beaten by 2Vi hanger throughout its 6:47" duration, immediately. national squad and some notable lengths—reversing the previous day's IC won by 4 feet. Bill Mason is 38. 3YMG's announce the 'bring European crews. back Said to Room 14' Campaign. The heavy weight four finished 6th Responsible re-apps shouldn't on Saturday with a slightly different fiddle the golf machine! crew stroked by super-heavy weight, Nick Leigh, came 3rd in their heat Hallam, how many times a day does the postman come? Or behind a World Under 23 gold medal doesn't she? winning crew. The coxless pair came 3rd in their Amendment —Any reference to Nigel's b*m originated from that heat which was a little disappointing. locality. The Rhino Club. However, these boys were to later have satisfaction in a spectacle which Do not disturb NH90, unless brought keen interest from the crowds you've got a booking, of course. as they 'licked' the classy UL pair in It was not me, it was the other a very enviable performance. three. Gordon. It was not me, it was the other CRICKET three. Tony. It was not me, it was the other three. Nancy. Sticky It was not me, it was the other three. Amanda. It was not me, it was the other Wicket four, and I'm pissed off. Dave. To the Ferret, of £5 ono is not 2nd XI Cricket vs UCL forthcoming by Friday your hat SQUASH will be frozen and shattered into a Having already qualified for the million pieces. £5 to RCS Rag. knock-out round of the UAU tournament, today's game was the For undercover knowledge of fortification find Ann. match to confirm IC's place at the top Unsquashable of the league. IC batted first, and NH90: Business as usual (ie despite an unpleasantly sticky wicket, very unusual—Access and Barclaycard, Amex—that'll do managed to put on 80 runs before Four IC squash players have proved their last four games finally left nicely. lunch. After the break Adrian Lewis to be 'unsquashable' and are now Lenssen, Bashir, Midler and Patel terrorised the UC bowling with an team champions of London's Fourth two points clear of the disappointed Faz—what's it to be, space inspired 48, but the loss of his wicket Division. LSE team. The four victims were shuttle or trashy women? Well, at least you know about space heralded a tail end collapse and we London Business School, Westfield, The fifth team of IC snapped the shuttles... were all out for 142. Championship from the London Queen Mary College and St Thomas's Mr Lewis's batting exertions had School of Economics virtually on the Hospital. Tim Chang the fastest student left him too shattered to bowl, and cut 'finishing line'. The LSE had started This success is, as team captain between two houses. IC's attack to three bowlers. this squash season as the mighty Lewis Lenssen explains, partly the What's the difference between Fortunately, we had the men for the favourite but surprisingly dropped reward for a 'very good team spirit'. 3 materials and 1 Aero 2 student? job in the agile O'Brien and stubborn points against teams from the midfield 'When I was on the court, I knew One has a Mercedes, the other 3 consistency of Tim Harmer and Andy of the league table, which then I was not just playing for myself, but pay for it. McGee. With eight runs to spare, the suffered 'whitewash' defeats against fighting for the team. We have always Dear Tim, we love you really, last UC wicket fell and the 2nd XI Imperial College. given a lot of moral support to each can we stay in your house next was triumphant. Four convincing 5-0 victories in other'. year? Love, Aero 2.

12 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX ety Rage PHOTOGRAPHIC Exhibiting Ckssici music The ICSO was not put off by the shortness of the Spring term and put ourselves on another ambitious programme- The Imperial College Photographic it was ambitious, I play in the 'cello Society opens a summer exhibition in section and I can vouch for it! the Consort Gallery, Sherfield Building on Tuesday May 24 at The programme consisted of: 7.30pm. Suite No 1 from 'Carmen' by Bizet Work on show will include the best Reinicke Flute Concerto in D Maj entries in our competition 'Exploring Peterloo Overture by Malcolm London', and also a selection of the Arnold best work from society members. The Suite from Star Wars by John competition has been sponsored by Williams Jessops and Paterson, and awards for the best prints will be presented on The first half consisted of the Bizet the opening night. and the Reinicke flute concerto. The Opening at 7.30pm with cheese and wind section had a very tricky task wine, anyone is welcome, not just IC RADIO in the Bizet but had a great society members. There is no charge, opportunity to put their talents on however, if you do want to come show. There are some fast and testing along please give either Sophie Fast trousers passages in 'Carmen' but these posed Jackson (int 4541) or Phil Turner (int Due to popular complaints, Spenser no problem proving the ability of the 7488) a ring in advance so that we can 'Fast' Lane and Neil 'Trouser' Press wind section. cater for the right number of people. are doing a new radio show on We are very lucky in having so The exhibition will run for four Wednesday at 1pm. This will have the many talented players in ICSO and weeks, and we hope most people will usual letter's page, Mike's Handy Robert Manasse is certainly one of get a chance to see it this time. It then Tips, and a new feature with a special them. He played the Reinicke with transfers to Jessops on New Oxford jingle machine, which also works feeling and apparent ease. Street for two weeks commencing part-time as toilet attendant at the The Peterloo Overture was July 1. V&A. So tune in. commissioned in 1968 to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the TUC. It regales the events of the Peterloo massacre in 1819 in IC.CHOIR. which 11 people were killed by cavalry. It was a piece of great contrast and was my favourite piece in the programme, a feeling shared by many others. CONCERT BAND The Grand Finale was the suite from the motion picture Star Wars- big tunes, that are well known and Concert bang reminiscent of Mars from the Planets, tender tunes represent Princess Leia. Yes it's that time of year again when The only possible criticism of this Dramsoc rock the whole of South may be that the French Horn player 1 Kensington with pyrotechnics, while experienced some difficulty in the Queen's Tower sways with bell overcoming nerves whilst playing her 1Q ringing and the Concert Band plays solo. This was a pity as in the Tschaikovski's 1812 Overture, all at rehearsals she'd played faultlessly. the same time! Those here last year The thing I admired was that she will remember witnessing this event continued to complete the solo which l hEAf^ Youe SON'S S.^CT^C- W.-I- I-C r H r.t>: while eating their lunches on the isn't easy if you know of a slight ' YE fif Queen's Lawn in blazing sunshine. error. ' a'of.M to oc AMI, See «,».?' We've booked the sun for Tuesday The finale was a wonderful blaze ' NCPE.1 May 24 at 1pm this year so take a of sound that roused the audience and "' THEiR -STuOerJT B*>R,'S G-OT c«9TLEi break from revision and witness the ensured the concert finished with a 1 COULDN'T GrtVE A AAA A main event of the summer. bang.

FAURE ~ REQUIEM The remainder of the programme PURCELL ~ MY HEART IS \HD\T\HG includes: SCHUBERT -SONG OF MIRIAM Medley from 'Time Out' BLAKE ~ THE SONG OF ST FRWCIS Dave Brubeck Egmont Overture Friday 20" May . at 8 m in The Great Hall . P Beethoven Tickers available From the Haldane Library or Fantasy on British Sea Songs on the door , priced - £ 1-80 sfudetits , £3 ~ ™ siuder\+s Gordon Langford Blue Tango Leroy Anderson

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 13 Diary

Parachute Club Canoe Club 6.30pm. Traditional breathing What's On M eeting 12.30pm. Meet in Beit Quad for training meditation. Everyone welcome. Union Lower Lounge. See Max session in swimming pool. No charge. Hunt von Herbing (Chairman). Judo 6.30pm. FRIDAY Artsoc Meeting 12.30pm. Union Gym. Sorry —no more SCR Union. Come to sign up beginners. THURSDAY and pay your money for tickets Caving Club ICYHA Meeting 12.30pm. for forthcoming events, eat Conservative Meeting 7.00pm. Southside Upper Lounge. biscuits and drink coffee. Free Soc Meeting 12.30pm. Southside Upper Lounge. ME 569. to members (membership Socialist Society £1.50). Advanced Meeting 12.45pm. Circuit Ballroom 7.00pm. Brown Committee Room. All Recitation of Training 12.30pm. JCR. 80p. See Dance Club welcome. Contact Adrian Union Gym with Cross Country Holy Qur'an 1.00pm. Grainger (Maths 3). and Athletics Club. Everyone 9 Prince's Gardens. See IC Radio 8.00pm. welcome. Free. Islamic Society. Psychedelic & Indie Show. Newsbreak 1.00pm. STOIC. IC's own news Orienteering 12.30pm. Golf Practice 5.30pm. Improvers programme. Brown/Green Committee Room Union Gym. See Golf Club. Ballroom 8.00pm. JCR. 80p. See Dance Club. SFSOC Libary (top floor of Union Building). Intermediate Arrangements for following Meeting 1.00pm. Ballroom 7.00pm. Canoe Club Sunday's event. Green Committee Room, Union JCR. 80p. See Dance Club. Meeting 8.30pm. Building. Borrow books from Islamic Prayer 1.00pm. Above Southside Bar. our vast library, help plan The Union Building. See Dai Rocking 9.00pm. future events. Members only. Islamic Society. IC Radio (999kHz). The best in Arabic Classes 1.30pm. Into the Night 7.00pm. hard rock and not-so-hard rock Prayer Room. See Islamic STOIC. Films, videos, chat, music including the featured Society. 'Countdown'. On all the album every week with Dave televisions in the Halls of Williams. Gliding Club Residence. Meeting 5.30pm. Shotokan Aero 254. Arrange trial flights, Karate 7.00pm. WEDNESDAY lifts to Lasham, talks and then SATURDAY Southside Gym. Beginners to the bar. welcome. £1. Sailing 12.30pm. Orienteering Meet outside Southside. Shotokan Beginners Training 5.30pm. Karate 10.00am. Ballroom 8.00pm. S.L.A.G.S. Meeting 12.30pm. Union Gym. Social meeting Southside Gym. Beginners JCR. 80p. See Dance Club. Society for Lesbian and Gay held from 6.30pm onwards. welcome. £1. Tang Soo Do 9.00pm. Students meets in the Green Southside Gym. Beginners Committee Room (top floor welcome. £1.00 members. Union Building). Come along for a chat if you don't mind people thinking you're going to TUESDAY a Wargames Society meeting! Golf Meeting 1.00pm. Christian Sudbury. Regular weekly Union 8.1 Sam. meeting. Chemistry 231. See Steve Clark, Christian Union. Caving Club Meeting 1.00pm. Boardsailing Club ..12.30pm. Union Snack Bar. Tang Soodo 4.00pm. Election for next year's posts. Union Gym. Beginners Southside Upper Lounge. Wargames Meeting.. 1.00pm. welcome. £1 members. Senior Common Room. IC CathSoc Mass ..12.30pm. Chemistry 231. Quiet and Beginners contemplation between Rock n Roll 2.15pm. SUNDAY lectures or exams. Food Union Dining Hall. 80p. See ill provided (50p). All welcome. Dance Club. Sunday Service 10.00am. Newsbreak 6.00pm. Sherfield Building, The Boardsailing 12.30pm. STOIC. Communion Service. Don't Regular meeting in Southside miss it!. Lounge to organise trips. Judo 6.30pm. Union Gym. Sorry —no more Wargames QT Soc Meeting 1.00pm. beginners. M eeting 1.00pm. Southside Upper Lounge (or ULU Lesbian Gay Senior Common Room. Pizza Bar). Plot-hatching extravaganza! New members Group 7.30pm. Union Bar 7.00pm. welcome. ULU Building, Malet Street Labatt Promotion. Canadian Shotokan (Russell Sq. tube). For Export Lager. Buy 2 bottles get Holy Qur'an Karate 3.00pm. speakers and booze and if 1 free. Recitation , 1.30pm. Southside Gym. Beginners you're feeling adventurous a Prayer Room. See Islamic welcome. £1. trip out to nightclub or pub Society. afterwards. Offbeat Practice 3.15pm. MONDAY Amnesty Meeting ....1.30pm. Union Dining Hall. 80p. See ICCAG Soup Run 9.15pm. Brown Committee Room. Dance Club. Meet 16-18 Prince's Gardens. Rock Soc FREE. Meeting. 12.30pm. ULU Meditation The Martyn with a Y radio Southside Upper Lounge. Islamic Circle 5.30pm. Group 7.00pm. extravaganza evening. Interested in any form of rock? Prayer Room. See Islamic Room 3A, University of The bestest collation show in Come along! Society. London Union, Malet Street. the whole widest world.

14 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX to- Letter

An open letter to the Union President how your editorial sounds, when reported FELIX style; Small Ads T always believed that growing up, maturing, call it what you will, was something you did by your own experience...I feel I've missed something.' Syd's circus Is this a true record of your editorial? I leave it to your ANNOUNCEMENTS Dear Mr Howgate, readers to judge for themselves. City & Guilds Motor Club To set the record straight, I still feel my reporting was annual dinner will be held on I am writing with reference to the orchestrated circus Friday May 27 at the Vanderbilt that occurred last Monday night ie ICU Council. factual. I quoted from the minutes of the catering Hotel. Tickets from C&G Office. Specifically I refer to four items of business. committee and the letter sent to Mr Rose last Friday. At Item one: you steadfastly refused to discuss Mr Alan no point did I quote Mr Harbour-Bridge, since I felt he ACCOMMODATION Rose's conduct with regard to Union Bar/Snack Bar losses. was too emotionally involved to give an objective report Need somewhere to live over The reason given was that a police investigation was on the events at the time. Mr Rose did not appear in the summer? Huge double/triple room pending. However Mr Chas Jackson stated from the floor Union Office all day and was not available on the to let in massive flat in Earl's that Mr Rose was only guilty of 'gross mismanagement' telephone; how could I have asked him for comment? I Court. Kitchen, bathroom, central and that there was no hint of criminal activity on his part. spoke to one of the Bar Staff to find the main areas of heating, colour TV and access to complaint they had and then tried to find out more about Philbepch Gardens! Share with one The obvious assumption from this is that you deliberately other person. £50 pwpp (up to set out to deceive Council. what had gone on. Most of the facts were, and still are, £18 rebate) for 3 people, . Item two: you reintroduced Constitution and Policy unavailable and I can understand why. If you were £40pwpp for 4. Contact J Howard Officer via 'the back door' in the form of amended job considering the dismissal of one of your permanent LSD2 or phone Emma on 385 descriptions for UGM and Council chairs. This is despite members of staff, wouldn't you feel it only fair that they 6277 between 9.30am and were given the full list of reasons at their hearing before 5.00pm. a decision by a previous UGM to throw out this new job. As I was elected UGM chair before this new job they were distributed to all and sundry? FOR SALE description went through I am now expected to carry out As for your complaint that I was reporting on ICU a job for which I did not stand. The reasoning behind this affairs, why shouldn't I? It seems that you are incapable Yamaha CD-X5 Player. Perfect is presumably to force my resignation so that either of doing so properly. condition, £165. Contact J C Fitzmaurice, Chem Eng (int 4639). yourself or your sidekick Mr Neil McCluskey can stand I shall certainly be at the AGM to question our Union as CPO, a job you are sure to reintroduce. Tough luck, Officers. I presume you will be there as one of the PERSONAL I'm staying. sabbaticals, paid and elected by the student populace. It's I bet Prophylatic Press wished Item three: Along with Mr Nigel Baker, you helped to just a pity that you feel yourself above having to write he used a rubber to erase his ensure that Mr Dave Tyler did not receive social colours an annual report and being answerable to a UGM—you mistake. for his contribution to Rag this year. Anyone who raises are. Due to awesome demand the a four-figure sum for Rag, helps to organise Rag events Yours, Press & Lane team also going on and goes out collecting from theatres at times when he Dave Smedley, Broadsheet Editor. air on Wednesday, 1pm on IC probably had better things to do, surely deserves some Radio. recognition from Imperial College Union. Am I right in IC Radio can be found on the assuming that personal opinions have influenced your Radio decision? Item four: You successfully moved that all Pub Board Useful info And not on the TV. colours be referred back for reconsideration. The reason Nor the tipex bottle for this is apparent to anyone with half a brain in their Dear Judith, Introducing Spenny Lane—the head, you objected to certain members of FELIX staff Covenants to Students only man with a radio show worth receiving an award specifically because they have been It has come to my notice—via a son who still manages listening to—Gary Davis. critical of your action this year—notably in the past four to defy the efforts of the examiners at Durham I couldn't have said this—The weeks. This was not the reason given Monday night. University—that in the last budget Mr Lawson, in addition Rector. In conclusion. Mr Howgate, you deceived Council in to stopping student covenants except those drawn up before 15th March 1988 also insert a requirement to the effect This quote has been quoted much the same way as you have deceived the members completely out of context. of Imperial College Union all year. I await your reply to that an existing covenant will be allowed to continue only this letter. You surely deem a reply is necessary, as no if the actual deed is submitted for inspection to the Who wears the trousers in the taxpayer's Inland Revenue office before 30th June 1988. accounts department? response is an endorsement of the above points. Yours cynically, I had not realised this and suspect that many students You know its double entry Paul Shanley. and parents may be unaware of the requirement. Perhaps when...a finance officer tells you to you have already drawn attention to the matter in previous drop your pants. issues of FELIX but, even so, a reminder might be What's seven inches long, 2 prudent. inches wide and lovely to nibble? Yours sincerely, A kinder egg of course! Objective report? P Holmes, SL cute and cuddly definitely. Dear Judith, Professor of Hydraulics, Imperial College. Sweet and innocent never. No not I question strongly your view of the 'truth'. How can me —HIM, My seven inch bundle anybody purporting to have one iota of journalistic ability, of fun!! Meow, SK. produce a flysheet, based on an hour and a half long Beit Hall 2nd floor (NH) is a interview, and still misrepresent the facts at the time with gay rendezvous. a report dotted with tiny quotes? You reported that Mr A tool writes Fez U is fond of little boys. Harbour-Bridge 'said that he could have sacked the staff who were suspected of petty pilfering but if he had got Dear Judith, Wipg is full of 'Grace' when he does it. the wrong people it "would have been far worse" than The day before yesterday, I had just finished writing sacking everybody.' The only quote you used in this a long letter to my friend, which had taken three hours. Rakesh uses little girls. paragraph made no mention of the word 'sacking'. The However, I discovered, to my horror that I did not have The Acton 49ers do it on one Snack Bar staff have been 'laid off, since the outlet has a stamp. I asked all my friends to see if they had a spare ski. been closed. Technically, you can't 'sack' casual staff one, but unfortunately they didn't. Fortunately the Post since they have no contract of employment; do you still Office was still open, so I managed to get one there. Doom Doom Doom! Inspired words from a man who knows say your reporting was factual? Yours, how to kill ants. What fun can be had from quoting out of context. Here's Les E Spanner.

FELIX Friday May 20th 1988 15 News m JT^fSj\ continued from front page meeting. Later he told FELIX that this had 150 beds lost in Lexham A procedural motion tabled by not been just a spontaneous reaction, David Clements that the meeting but that he had for some weeks been Imperial College students are likely The Landlord, Mr Dangoor, was move on to the elections was defeated. upset at the way his union was being to lose the use of the Lexham Gardens unavailable for comment, however it A second procedural motion, calling treated. He condemned the fact that head tenancies from the end of this appears that he has actually offered on the Executive to explain their the AGM achieved so little and said term, it was revealed today by IC to sell the houses to College. It seems actions immediately, rather than in a he felt the chairing of the meeting was Union President Sydney unlikely, however, that the College written statement in FELIX, was poor. St Mary's meetings were much Harbour-Bridge. Residence Account could afford to tabled and passed. more civilised and ordered, he said, The 150 beds have been at risk compete in price with developers. Royal School of Mines Union and they got much more done. since an inspection by the Local Loretta O'Callaghan, President Mr Geoff Parsons spoke on The meeting finally decided to Authority found various faults in the Accommodation Officer, has behalf of the ICU Executive. He consider the annual reports. A motion buildings. These faults included expressed her regret at the loss of the explained that the decisions was passed mandating the FELIX problems with roofing, drains and places, but said that there were one concerning Mr Rose and the Bar and Editor to write an annual report. Such gutters as well as certain breaches of or two alternative places that they Snack Bar staff had been taken after a motion is not technically within the fire regulations. The Local Authority were looking into. 12-13 hours of meetings and stressed remit of a UGM. The by-laws state served inspection notices on the Sydney Harbour-Bridge was also that they had not been made lightly. that 'the officers of the Union shall landlord which required him to carry saddened by the news, especially in He stated that an emergency be responsible for carrying out the out work on the properties to bring light of the fact that they had already Executive meeting had taken place policy of the Union as determined by them up to standard. lost 50 places in Hamlet Gardens and l 2h weeks ago, at which all the a General Meeting'. The FELIX Although the Local Authority does another 22 in Earls Court Square. It Executive officers, except Alan Rose, Editor is not classed as a Union have some discretion on how long would make life more difficult for had been present. The meeting was Officer in these by-laws. The UGM they can allow landlords to carry out those who had already been accepted also attended by the Union Bar may choose to dismiss a FELIX maintenance work in general, this to live there next year, he said, though licencees, Dr Robert Schroter and Editor but no other practical power does not apply where fire regulations there was no suggestion that these Mrs Jen Hardy-Smith, Dave Peacock, over the FELIX Editor. But by this have been breached. In any case, people would not get places the Union Manager, and by Chris time nobody was paying too much College Secretary John Smith told somewhere. Martin and Nigel Baker as observers. attention to procedure. FELIX, it would be irresponsible to The houses had been known to be A second meeting took place where There was another procedural have students living in the building if under threat for some time, but it was Mr Rose was present in order to motion, calling for the elections to be this work was not carried out. only in the last couple of weeks that answer accusations. It was at a third run, which was passed. All elections It is thought that the investment that Malcolm Aldridge of Finance meeting that it was decided to relieve took place with only the GUC the landlord would have to make in Section, who had been negotiating Mr Rose of his duties concerning the delegates elections being referred order to bring the accommodation up with the landlord, decided that there Union trading outlets. This decision back to the next Union General to an acceptable level for students was little prospect of a settlement had been made unanimously, said Mr Meeting. Quorum was then called would be so high that he would be which would mean College keeping Parsons. He went on to say that the during a motion on Human Rights more likely to want to sell the the houses. Executive felt that Mr Rose had not Week and the meeting was closed at buildings outright or redevelop them The present lease for the buildings fulfilled his responsibility and that he 3.30pm. as luxury flats. runs out at the end of June. had been obstructive when working with the Union Bar licencees. He said that he felt that all the decisions which had been made in the last few weeks had been in the best interests of all Professor Alan Cowlev Passed the post students. appointed to top position Gill Knowles has been returned Mr Rose said that in his opinion unopposed as next year's Women's 'certain facts' had been distorted by Officer at this year's Annual General the Union President. He also believed Professor Alan Cowley, currently of useful in this respect. Meeting. Several other elections took that the Union had 'taken on too much the University of Austin in Texas, is Alan Cowley was born in place at the meeting. Chris Stapleton too soon' as far as the outlets were to take the Sir Edward Frankland Manchester on 29 January 1934. He was returned as ICU Housing Officer, concerned. chair of Inorganic Chemistry at received a BSc -with Honours in Martyn Peck as ICU Publicity Several more questions were tabled Imperial. He will succeed Sir Chemistry from Manchester Officer, Jan Graham as Haldane from the floor until a vote was taken Geoffrey Wilkinson, FRS and Nobel University, where he also earned an Record Buyer, Andrew Thompson as at 2.50pm as to whether any more Laureate, who has been at Imperial MSc in 1956 and a PhD in 1958. For FELIX Business Manager and David discussion should take place on the for 32 years. the next two years he worked at the Clements as Postgraduate Affairs issue. The meeting decided after a The appointment comes at a time University of Florida, before taking Officer. An election for House vote that it did not wish to carry on when the Chemistry Department, the post of Technical Officer with the Committee Chairman was avoided the debate and the agenda went back under its new head, Professor John Exploratory Group of Imperial when Sydney Harbour-Bridge (name to the minutes and reports. Albery, has plans to widen its Chemical Industries (Billingham changed in aid of Comic Relief) At this point, Philip Drew, activities. There is to be close Division). In April 1962 he started as decided to stand down, leaving President of St Mary's Medical collaboration between the Department Assistant Professor of Chemistry at Andrew Thompson unopposed for the School Union, stood up to speak. He and the new Interdisciplinary the University of Texas, and in 1984 post. Sumeet Ghaie and Neil said that he was appalled at how badly Research Centre in Semiconductor he was appointed George W Watt Motteram will be next year's House the meeting had been conducted and Growth, Characterisation and Centennial Professor of Chemistry. Committee Ordinary Members. that he would suspend all negotiations Processing. Professor Cowley's Professor Cowley was elected a The only election to take place at between his and IC Union until ICU expertise in designing molecules for Fellow of the Royal Society in March the meeting was that for Haldane 'put its house in order'. He then lead laying down very thin films on this year. Book Buyer. Andrew Meredith won his fellow St Mary's students from the semiconductors will be particularly by a small majority.

FELIX is published by the Editor lor and on behalf of Imperial College Union Publication Board and is printed by the Imperial College Union Print Unit, Prince Consort Road. London. SW7 2BB (Tel 01-589 5111 ext 3515). Editor: Judith Hackney. Business Manager: Chris Martin. Copyright FELIX 1988 ISSN 1040-0711.

16 Friday May 20th 1988 FELIX