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Maurice Hamilton's Blog - F1 Tyres - a Load of Baloney

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Maurice Hamilton's Blog - F1 Tyres - a Load of Baloney 11/25/2016 Maurice Hamilton's blog - F1 Tyres - A load of baloney F1 tyres: A load of baloney 308d ­ Maurice Hamilton Zak Brown: 'Flexibility' the key to securing title sponsor by 2018 2h ­ Laurence Edmondson Rosberg vs. Hamilton: Track action begins in Abu Dhabi 4h ­ Laurence Edmondson and FNate1 Sau ntderys res: A load of baloney Hamilton starts title showdown by topping FP1 4h ­ ESPN Staff FP1 time for one, nap time for another. Here the v... 5h Andretti: Rosberg would be a deserving champion 5h Hamilton 'proud' of how Rosberg has driven 5h ­ Laurence Edmondson No German GP in 2017 ­ Hockenheim boss 6h ­ Nate Saunders Hamilton cites Serena Williams as inspiration 3h ­ Lewis Larkam Peter J Fox/Getty Images @ £ Grosjean: Gutierrez is faster than people think 7h ­ Nate Saunders Maurice Hamilton 22 Jan, 2016 F1 title goes down to the wire 7h http://www.espn.co.uk/f1/story/_/id/14625087/maurice-hamilton-blog-f1-tyres-load-baloney 1/6 11/25/2016 Maurice Hamilton's blog - F1 Tyres - A load of baloney I recently watched Sky Sports F1's Ted Kravitz spend 12 minutes manfully Rosberg rebuffs suggestion he should play dirty battling to explain the latest F1 tyre regulations with the help of Post-it Notes 1d ­ Nate Saunders and his daughter's Play Doh. He did an excellent job but, no disrespect to Ted whatsoever, I couldn't help but think of a daft television sitcom from the 1990s. Alonso: No Le Mans until I win third title 1d ­ Nate Saunders @ Father Ted was about three priests sharing a house on Craggy Island, a fictional Rosberg downplays impa°ct of mechlaonciaction somewhere off the west coast of Ireland. Father Ted had the task of swap dealing with Father Dougal -- not the brightest coin on the collection plate -- 23h ­ Nate Saunders £ and Father Jack, a 'Feckin Drunk' as he might say loudly and frequently. Raikkonen backs Rosberg's title fight approach I'm only mentioning it because I'm sure this chaotic collection of eejits must 21h ­ Lewis Larkam have dreamed up the latest F1 tyre regulations. It can be no other way when you Vettel: Ferrari 'cannot be proud' of 2c0o1n6sider the rules were revised to improve F1 while, in the process, making it 23h ­ Nate Saunders more difficult for the layman to understand. Button: I might be done with F1 for gHoeorde's how Father Ted and his associates might cope when presented with the 1d ­ Nate Saunders latest F1 technical conundrum. Nasr expects points to help him in Sauber talks So Ted, tell me, will I understand these new rules? 20h ­ Lewis Larkam No Dougal, you will not. Perez won't budge over sponsor Trump­ gaffe 1d ­ Nate Saunders Why's that, Ted? What to expect in Abu Dhabi It's like this, Dougal. There's the white, the yellow and the red. And now there's 19h the purple, which is called the ultra­soft. Pirelli unveils 25­percent thicker 2017 tyre So that's softer than the soft? Have I got that right, Ted? 1d ­ Nate Saunders It's actually softer than the super­soft, Dougal. But don't worry yourself about Gutierrez to hold 'clear the air talks' with Haas that. Now here's the thing. At any one race, you could have the choice of three 1d ­ Nate Saunders of them, except when the choice is two. And then you hand one of them back. Not sure which one, but don't worry about that for now. Are you with me so Ferrari to end on a high? 19h far? No chair for Vettel at his Thursday mI ethdiank so, Ted. session,... 1d So, you have 13 sets for the weekend. In the first practice session you use the Rosberg v Hamilton: The Abu Dhabiw tihtlietes and hand one set back after 40 minutes. In the second session, you can permutations try the yellows if you like. And you could even try the red ­­ or it might be the 2d ­ Nate Saunders purple. Horner: Rosberg under more pressure than Hamilton Oh, I'd do that, Ted. I like red. But is there no green? 1d ­ Laurence Edmondson Yes, there is Dougal. But that's for when it's raining. Felipe Massa's finest moments in F1 1d ­ Kate Walker We'd need the green here because it's always feckin raining. Verstappen 'neutral' towards recent Senna comparisons MANAN VATSYAYANA/AFP/Getty Images 1d ­ Nate Saunders Not a bad setting for a championshiIpndeed, Dougal. As I was saying, you then have to give back those whites and showdown... T... 1d yellows and reds ­­ or you could have the purple. But then on the next day you start again, again ­­ if you know what I mean. Button's 10 best F1 drives http://www.espn.co.uk/f1/story/_/id/14625087/maurice-hamilton-blog-f1-tyres-load-baloney 2/6 11/25/2016 Maurice Hamilton's blog - F1 Tyres - A load of baloney 2d ­ Nate Saunders A bit like you have to do when you're telling me something, Ted? Can Toro Rosso impress in 2017? 8h That's right, Dougal. So, for qualifying and the race, you have seven sets but only the white and the yellow can be used in the race and the Q3 fellas can use Going down to the wire: The best setahseo nred, but then they have to give them back as well. finales in F1 history 2d ­ ESPN Staff Why's that, Ted? Do they get a discount if they're not used too much? Canada confirms place on 2017 F1 grid 2d ­ Nate Saunders No, Dougal. It's too difficult to explain. Just remember that everyone has to start the race on the tyres they used in the second part of qualifying. Everyone Button excited by 'new beginning' after Abu Dhabi has to give back one set, bar... 2d ­ Nate Saunders Bar! Where? Drink! Drink! Alonso confident Honda will deliver competitive engine in 2017 3d ­ Laurence Edmondson Not now, Father Jack. Not now. Paddy Lowe: Title battle creates Feck! 'significant tension' 3d ­ Laurence Edmondson Where were we? Everyone bar the top 10 has to hand back one set. Now these Symonds not expecting Brawn­stylefastest ten fellas are going into the final bit of qualifying, which is called Q3 domination to emerge from 2017 reegvsen though they're looking to qualify first on the grid as opposed to being the 3d ­ Laurence Edmondson first person to qualify, if you follow me. But before this, in the second part of Zak Brown joins McLaren as executiqvuealifying, which is Q2, they had to decide that maybe the fastest tyre ­­ that director would be the red or it could be the purple ­­ might be the quickest but they 3d ­ Laurence Edmondson don't want to start the race with it because it might not last five minutes. Bernie thinks Mercedes, Ferrari will walk away from F1 Why would they make a tyre like that, Ted? 4d ­ Nate Saunders Don't ask awkward questions, Dougal. So they use the yellow tyre in Q2 Rosberg won't settle for second to secure title knowing it will be good for the race. But then some other cheeky fella in Q2 4d ­ Laurence Edmondson takes a chance and uses the red one ­­ or it could be the purple ­­ because he has nothing to lose, gets himself into Q3 and pisses off the quick guys. Hamilton proud of 2016 regardless of title outcome 4d ­ Nate Saunders Haven't a feckin clue what you're saying Ted, but that last bit sounds grand. Malaysia will not renew F1 deal beyoHndaven't finished, Dougal. As I said, you're told you can only use two types of 2018 4d ­ Nate Saunders tyre for the race, but you don't have to. Alonso hints at future Porsche,WECW dehayl's that, Ted. 4d ­ Nate Saunders No idea, Dougal. But here's another thing. Those boys who weren't in the Wolff on Abu Dhabi showdown: May the best man win fastest ten can do what they like. 4d ­ Nate Saunders Could they go home if they wanted, Ted? Hulkenberg determined to end Force India stint with 'celebration' 4d ­ Nate Saunders They could, Dougal. But I think Father Bernard might take a dim view of it. Ericsson to stay at Sauber in 2017 Hector Vivas/LatinContent/Getty Images 4d ­ Nate Saunders Life Through a Lens ­ Brazilian GranAdh, he's the sort of High Priest who takes the collection. Is that right, Ted? Prix 5d ­ Mark Sutton He owns the collection box, the church, the churchyard, he knows where the Ecclestone calls for shorter F1 racesbodies are buried; the lot. Anyway, as I was saying, these fellas could run all 5d ­ Nate Saunders day provided they don't have a problem with something called deg. http://www.espn.co.uk/f1/story/_/id/14625087/maurice-hamilton-blog-f1-tyres-load-baloney 3/6 11/25/2016 Maurice Hamilton's blog - F1 Tyres - A load of baloney Keg? Keg! Drink! Drink! No, Jack. Deg. It's short for degradation, which is what's happening to you faster than it should. Feck! Anyway, this deg basically stops them from driving fast. But isn't that the point of this racing, Ted? Why would you want to do make them go slow? Because that's too simple, Dougal. There's 23 clauses and 12 sub­clauses in the regulations to make sure it's nice and complicated, just to confuse Eddie Jordan. That wouldn't be too difficult, Ted.
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