COMIC STRIPS ® KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE 12 Grinding Sausage PUBLISHER Kenzer and Company 14 Eat, Drink and Shop EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Jolly R. Blackburn • [email protected] 18 Spree Strategy ASSISTANT EDITOR 24 Quick Huddle Barbara Blackburn • [email protected] KODT DEVELOPMENT TEAM Swag Tsunami 25 Jolly R. Blackburn • Steve Johansson 27 Overload David S. Kenzer • Brian Jelke • Barbara Blackburn (+1) HACKMASTER EDITOR Steve Johansson • [email protected] 28 An Intervention KODT STRIP ART Jolly R. Blackburn 30 The Good Stuff COVER ART Bonnie Svitavsky 31 Did You Hear Something? CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS Brendon Fraim • Brian Fraim 33 Fair Game Larry Elmore • Paul Shiner Bill “Indy” Cavalier • Jolly Blackburn 63 One-Two Punches Cheesepawz • Carolyn Stogdill CONTRIBUTING WRITERS OTHER TOONS Kenneth Newquist • Noah Chinn • Jim Davenport Barbara Blackburn • Jeremy Meister 61 SnarfQuest™ Jolly R. Blackburn • Larry Elmore Larry Elmore J.L. Duncan • Alan Hume • Andy Miller 64 Additional Cartoons SALES/MARKETING/ADVERTISING Steve Johansson • [email protected] • 847-858-6847 Bill “Indy” Cavalier, Paul Shiner, Jolly Blackburn, Cheesepawz, Carolyn SUBSCRIPTION SERVICES [email protected] Stogdill CHARMED PERSONS Sample file Kevin Vance • Jack Grayson • Craig Zipse PRINTED IN U.S.A. ABOUT Postmaster: Send address changes to: THE COVER Knights of the Dinner Table This colorful cover was a 1659 N CLAREMONT AVE, CHICAGO, IL 60647 finalist in our KODT Cover E-Mail: [email protected] • Phone: 847.662.6600 Contest a few years ago World Wide Web: www.kenzerco.com by Bonnie Svitavsky. Submissions: We accept submissions for strip ideas, jokes, cartoons, etc. We are interested in running anything that other gamers and fans Somehow it got lost and would enjoy. Check out our website for writer’s guidelines. then found again. We’re Subscriptions: A standard 12-issue monthly subscription is only glad it showed up. $77.99 (or $65.99 for slower bulk mail shipping). [US $92.99 for Canada or US $117.99 for other foreign locations.] 6- and 24-issue subscriptions are also available. To subscribe, order by credit card at our online store at HTTP://WWW.KENZERCO.COM or send a check or money order (made payable to Kenzer and Company) to: NIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE™ was accidentally created by Jolly R. Blackburn Kway back in 1990 as ‘filler’ for his small press magazine, Shadis. It was Kenzer & Company KODT Subscriptions, something of a ‘creative burp’ and Jolly really didn’t give it much thought. 1659 N Claremont Ave, Chicago, IL 60647 Perhaps that’s why he was just as surprised as anyone that soon KODT was overshadowing everything else he’d ever done and that the created was now Back Issues: Older issues and other KODT merchandise are avail- able for direct purchase on our website at HTTP://WWW.KENZERCO.COM controlling the creator. The Knights have gone far beyond anything Jolly or the D-Team (David Kenzer, Brian Jelke, Steve Johansson and Barbara Blackburn) ever imagined. In 2006, Jolly was ATTENTION RETAILERS: If you are having difficulty getting our inducted into the Hall of Fame. Now, with over 244 issues and over 74 trade paper backs under product (including back issues and RPGs) please call or e-mail us. their belts, it’s been a wild ride and we look forward to seeing where the Knights take us next. Knights of the Dinner Table® #244 3 SUMMER TIME FUN... elcome to another issue of But also — I just recently added two more Knights of the Dinner Table. It’s guest appearances for 2017 that might not be W usually three or four weeks from on your radar. the time I pen this page until the issue hits the street so there’s a good chance many of the Let’s Play Events in Appleton, WI was kind things, I share here have already transpired or enough to invite me to come up and hangout is old news. with attendees. That one is June 30 to July 2. Be that as it may, as I write this our Aces and For more information you go here; Eights: Reloaded kickstarter is in full swing. http://tinyurl.com/kmvbaq7 We were delighted when it achieved funding in less than six hours. Many thanks to every- I’ll also be returning to Con on the Cob for one reading this who backed the project. And my third guest appearance (will they NEVER if you didn’t? Even if you missed the kick- learn?). This fun gathering is November 9 to starter you should still be able to take advan- 12 in Ohio and you can get more information tage of some of the product offers. Check here; http://cononthecob.com www.kenzerco.com for details. Well, summer is quickly approaching and If you’re at any of the events above be sure with it our busiest time of the year. A chance to come look us up, say hi and armwrestle us. for us to mingle with fans of our product, toss And with that, I’ll turn you over to the issue dice and celebrate gaming. in hand. I hope you enjoy it. We’ll be at the big two of course (GenCon and Origins) but also several smallerSample cons. Game file on, folks! Nexus in Milwaukee (which will be over by the time your read this most likely), Gamehole in .Jolly Blackburn November — which is growing by leaps and bounds. April 19, 2017 Twenty Years Ago This Month: A rescued princess is expected to pull her weight in the party on the trip back to her father.— from KODT# 7. May 1997 4 Knights of the Dinner Table® #244 that’s a SHAME, son. it REALLY is. the ALARM TRAP blows off BOTH your hands at the WRISTS — leaving you with two useless and splintered STUBS. geezus... damn — what good is a that’s “alarm THIEF with NO hands..? WICKED. trap”...? j forget THAT hoss. \ can render don’t worry, b.a. a MERCY KILLIN’ — jess STOVE \ have MASTER yer HEAD in for the E-PEES. FIRST AID... \ can cauterize those stubs. He’s not as bad as Tim Kask (The TPK’ster) Yes, that’s what I would have said twelve but he had us on our heels from the start. years ago. I was ignorant. Years ago my Like B.A. we bumbled and over looked nephew, who is one helluva kid, made some mistakes. EDITOR’S NOTE: The mail just some small detail that Gary must have had never seems to stop. While we penciled in and highlighted as being of He took up with a bad crowd, a poor make every effort to read each and utmost importance. choice for a girlfriend and screwed up. He every letter, it is not always possible I got carried down the corridor after that was all of 19 and some friends convinced to give a personal reply. Even if your letter encounter in a cloth sack only to be used him they could make a some quick cash if doesn’t happen to bepublished or if you don’t later as bait, to lure a troll our of hiding. they bought some drugs and flipped it. get a direct response, rest assured you are Great fun. He was caught and busted. Those ‘friends’ being heard. Looking forward to the next issue, sir. of his...? They testified against him and he Remember, KODT is an interactive took the brunt of the blame because it was . magazine. We want you, the reader, to be Tom Lynn his car and he was driving. He deserved to do involved. So keep your suggestions, thoughts some time. While incarcerated his mother and opinions (constructive and otherwise) GAMERS BEHIND BARS (my sister) died tragically. It nearly coming. Opinions expressed by readers are ReallySample enjoyed issue 243. fileCan’t wait to see destroyed him. not necessarily shared by the editor or Kenzer how Gary’s game of HackMaster turns out. To his credit he took courses while in lock and Company. Please be aware that due to B.A., sigh. The guy just can’t gt a break. up and learned a vocation. He got some reli- space considerations, some letters have been I’m actually writing because of the very gion too. Not the “I’m going to impress the edited and/or trimmed. — Jolly interesting guest editorial by the gentleman parole board” kind but the real soul search- who is incarcerated and advocating gaming ing and transfiguring kind. The kid turned KODT 242 in the penitentiary system. around his way of thinking and owned what he did and set out to make the same Just wanted to share my thoughts on the Good lord, I belly laughed at this issue. mistakes again. I will never tire of watching these characters matter. Please bear with me. One of his mentors in prison was a kindly sit the table and roll dice. Twelve years ago I would have told this middle aged man who wrote some bad guy, TOUGH. You did the crime and now you Gary Jackson running HackMaster for the checks. He introduced Jeff to gaming and are doing the time. This isn’t summer camp Gold Ticket group was a lot of fun. Reminds got some much needed distraction from all kiddo so pull up your big boy pants. me of a game, Gary Gygax ran for my the bad choices behind bars one can be buddies and myself years ago at PentaCon.. You don’t deserve Wii time or Xbox. Nor exposed to. Drugs, black marketing, that I’m not going to call him a killer GM but do you deserve lay about time watching TV, sort of thing.