Department of Educational Psychology
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UNIVERSITY OF ALBERTA THE LiVED EXPEFUENCE OF ADOLESCENT LOVE WENDY JOAN AUSTIN (-J A Thesis submitted to the Faculty of Graduate Studies and Research in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATIONAL PSYCHOLOGY EDMONTON, ALBERTA FALL 1997 National iibmry Bibliotheque nationale I*(of Canada du Canada Acquisitions and Acquisitions et Bibliographic Services seruices bibliographiques 395 Wellington Street 395. rue Wellington Ottawa ON K1A ON4 OttawaON KlAON4 Canada Canada The author has granted a non- L'auteur a accorde une licence non exclusive licence allowing the exclusive permettant à la National Library of Canada to Bibliothèque nationale du Canada de reproduce, loan, distribute or sell reproduire, prêter, distniuer ou copies of this thesis in microfonn, vendre des copies de cette thèse sous paper or electronic formats. la forme de microfiche/£ïlm, de reproduction sur papier ou sur format électronique. The author retains ownership of the L'auteur conserve la propriété du copyright in this thesis. Neither the droit d'auteur qui protège cette thèse. thesis nor substantial extracts fiom it Ni la thèse ni des extraits substantiels may be printed or otherwise de celle-ci ne doivent être imprimés reproduced without the author' s ou autrement reproduits sans son permission. autorisation. 1 am fourteen and my skin has betrayed me the boy 1 canot live without sucks his thumb in secret how corne my knees are always so ashy what if 1 die before morning and momma's in the bedroom with the door closed. First verse of Hanginp Fire fiorn Undersong by Audre torde. used with permission from W.W.Nonon & Company. New York. Copyright 199 1. This is dedicated to the ones I love. ABSTRACT hrsued in this study is the question: whar is the lived experience of adolescent love? A hemeneutic phenomenological approach is taken toward uncovering some essential aspects of love as lived by the teenager. Research activities include the gathenng of descriptions - through conversations or written disclosures -- fiom individuais who were in love as adolescents, explorations of Literary texts, movies, songs, metaphors and etymological sources, and reflection on personal experience. The investigator considers the influences that shape her own pre-understandings of love and that of her society by examining the psychological research literature on love, by reviewing theories that scholars and philosophers have developed to explain love and by revisiting great love stones that have survived across tirne. A description and interpretation of adolescent love is presented using the existential themes of body, time, space and relation. Four major t hemes are addressed : awakrnitlg,fa~litlg, possessed md becoming. Ad01 escence has been called a time of rebirth. In considering the scntimet~taled~tcatioti of adolescents, the pedagogical question is asked: how may we attend this rebirth in a helphl way? 1 am indebted to rnany people for their encouragement and assistance in the completion of this dissertation. To Liane Faulder and 73re Edmonton JmrnaI for the article whkh introduced the study to many participants. To the participants themselves for opening up their personai expenences of love in adolescence, for their rich and delightful conversation. To Len Stewin, my advisor, for his faith in my abilities and for his counsel and guidance. To Max van Manen and Vangie Bergum for sharing their expenence, scholarship and knowledge of phenornenology so generously and with the "tact" of truly gifted teachers. To Wilfied Schmidt and Gretchen Hess for their wisdom and encouragement. I was privileged to have such a diainguished dissertation cornmittee. To Brenda Cameron and Susan James for our "hermeneutic circle," a safe and stimulating enclosure where raw ideas and unformed pieces of writing were developed. To my classrnates, and in particular Michele Samuel, April Buchanan, Roberta Hewat, Casey Boodt and Serge Hein, for their good and stimulating Company. The times in which we exchanged ideas. books and the highs and Iows of research will be long remembered and treasured by me. To Helen Raboud and Robert and Cheryl Austin for kindly providing places where 1 found soIitude to think and write. To Linda Ogilvie and Pauline Paul for their acts of fnendship which peaked when I was racing to meet a submission deadline. From providing dinner to checking references to editing. they were there for me. To Yves Paradis for his contribution throughout this work. My interest in adolescent love genninated on a trip to France with twenty teenagers in 1986. Yves was the brave teacher on that joumey and later, as a fellow graduate student. shared this research joumey with me. As on that first trip, he has been a great travelling cornpanion, fi-om helping me to prepare for my proposa1 defense to editing this final draft. To my children, Mark and Kara Hurtig, for the chance to get a second look at adolescence through their young eyes, for their love and patience, always. My heartfelt thanks to them al]. I would also like to acknowledge the financial support for my studies that 1 received fiom the Social Sciences and Hurnanities Research Council of Canada, the University of Alberta, the Hentage Fund of the Province of Alberta, the Alberta Association of Registered Nurses and the Alberta Foundation for Nursing Research. Ethical... Considerations ........................................................................................ 74 Limitations........................................................................................... -75 The Themes ................................................................................................................... 75 Chapter Sir Awakening .................................................................................................................. -76 Awakening of the Body ........................................................................................ -77 The Time of Awakening ....................................................................................... 80 The Space to Awaken ........................................................................................... 84 Stoned Space: Romance Movies, Fiction and Song................................. 88 Awakening to the Other........................................................................................ 97 Chapter Seven Falling......................................................................................................................... -103 FalIing from the Everyday ..............................................................................106 Offthe Cliffs of the Heart ..................................................................... -108 The Stomach Tells............... ,... ....................................................... ... ....110 . .Fear of Falling ....................................................................................... -113 Falling in a Mad World ..................................................................................... 114 Falling for a True Love ..................................................................................... 121 Chapter Eight Possessed ...................................................................................................................... 130 Every Heartbeat Bears Your Name .............................................................. ...- 131 Searching for Clues ......................................................................................... -137 Sacredness...................................................................................................... Possessing Forever ............................................................................................ 148 Chapter Nine Becoming..................................................................................................................... 154 Speechless....................................................................................................... 155 An Act of Imagination ...................................................................................... 161 Dancing on the Brink of the World .................................................................... 167 Love is Becoming............................................................................................. 174 Chapter Ten The Sentimental Education ........................................................................................... 179 Attending the Rebirth ........................................................................................ 179 Acknowledge their expenence............................................................... 179 Acknowledge your experience.............................................................. -182 Keep the questions open ...................................................................... 183 Teach them to live into the answers....................................................... 185 References ........... .. ...................................................................................................-188 Appendix A Copyright Permission from W.W. Horton & Company................................................ 204 Appendix B Ethical Approval for Study........................................................................................ -206 Appendix C Informed Consent Agreement .....................................................................................209 LIST OF FIGURES Figure 1 1955 Songs...................................................................................................