It's a Mad, Bad, Glad, Ipad World

It’s a Mad, Bad, Glad, iPad World Friar Bob Hutmacher, ofm I’m writing on the first day of meteorological summer and my second idea for this Legionnaire article are memory flashes of Johnathan Winters, Milton Berle, Ethel Merman, Mickey Rooney, Buddy Hackett, Sid Caesar, Spencer Tracy, Dick Shawn, Phil Silvers, Edie Adams, Terry Thomas, Carl Reiner, Jimmy Durante and many more in the 1963 film, It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. The first thoughts I had were of last night’s tornado in the western suburbs, U.S. bishops treading in dangerous waters, more mass shootings than even a twisted mind could imagine, a new Covid variant rampant throughout the world and a steamer trunk full of bad news. However ~ I believe we need a break from all the anxiety of the plague behaviors (as I call them), interior damage, negative vibes and scary thoughts of a divided country and divided Church ~ and smile with delight at some of our Catholic behavior. A number of years ago Travelers Aid operated out of our lower level to assist the lost and forsaken of our city. There was a period when this social service kindly offered free sandwiches and coffee on Friday afternoon to anyone and everyone in need. And anyone and everyone flocked to the basement of St. Peter’s! Word on the street spreads quickly and when it was Sandwich Friday here, there was always a line down into the basement. I happened to be in confessional #12 that day, the most frequented one we have in church. One man in need came into church, saw people in line for confession and joined them. He came in, knelt down (see above) and when I slid the privacy panel open said: “Hey man, you got sandwiches? And can I have cream in my coffee? What’s with this door?” I had to bite my tongue and both lips for a bit before I could direct him downstairs. When asked about being part of a church in the Loop, I often say: when you open your doors to the world, the world walks in! We Catholics can be a funny lot sometimes, can’t we? In 1997 I was leading a group of pilgrims in the Franciscan Pilgrimage Program; they were all leaders of Franciscan hospitals and universities throughout the U.S. and our role was to educate them about Francis and Clare for ten days. We planned a visit to the magnificent Basilica of Our Lady of Angels in the valley below Assisi that shelters the tiny Porziuncola chapel where Francis lived for 20 years and chose to die in it. Well, this was a special day because….with a police escort all the way from Padua up north in Veneto, the friars brought a major relic of St. Anthony to visit. The gargantuan doors of the Basilica swung open (only done on very special occasions) and ten friars carried in the relic on a special float covered with roses. Our group gathered for a close look at a huge monstrance containing the jawbone of Anthony, the great preacher. One of our pilgrims, a Baptist man from Louisiana, leaned over to me and asked about this monstrance and what was in it. When I explained the relic to him, his eyebrows went up to his hairline. And he’s the one who gave me the opening line of this paragraph: “You Cat’lics ur a funny lot.” In actuality, Spencer turned out to have a vibrant faith that augmented his Catholic wife’s in a unique and wondrous way. We still keep in touch. While we’re on Anthony, many of you know our shrine to him here at St. Peter’s (at left). One of my former jobs here was cleaning the statues twice a year with a crew. His statue is the most popular in the church which kind of irks me because Anthony gets more attention and donations than our founder, Francis. The marble is worn down on his hand that reaches to the Infant Jesus and (from those who are not as tall) his backside. One of the things I love about the statues in St. Peter’s is the splendid marble work. Personal Catholic piety dictates that we express our faith in myriad ways; I find it captivating even though it does present problems at times. The popularity of Anthony of Padua is worldwide and this statue of ours does not lack for being a place of intercession. His tiny relic in front of the statue has been kissed and caressed by thousands and thousands devoted to this Portuguese friar since our church opened in 1953. If you look very closely at my photo you see a rose lying across his legs. There’s a tiny space between the statue and the wall and it is often filled with all sorts of hand-written letters and prayer requests addressed to God through Anthony; or sometimes people skip God and go directly to “Tony, Tony, turn around, something’s lost, it must be found.” And this Tony does intercede for us! I’m not making light or fun of our personal piety because most all of us have special prayers and objects of devotion that help us communicate with God and saints outside of the public, liturgical rites of the Church. We need a healthy balance of both public and private prayer, both of which are necessary. One of my favorite stories about life here is what you see to the right: the poor box on the back wall of church. It used to have a plaque above it stating: St. Anthony Bread. That’s based on a legend (there are more) that dates back to the year 1263, when a child drowned near the Paduan Basilica of St. Anthony during its construction. The child’s mother prayed to the saint to bring her boy back to life. In return, she promised to give to the poor an amount of wheat equal to the child’s weight. When the child was miraculously revived, the mother made good on her promise. She fed the poor and churches all over the world have had St. Anthony Bread collection boxes ever since. Another legend from 19th century France involves a baker whose shop was miraculously opened without knocking the door in – after she prayed to St. Anthony. In gratitude, she baked loaves of bread for the poor of her town, Toulon. Hence came the name and charitable outreaches and custom of giving bread on June 13, Anthony’s feast. The collection boxes at all our shrines rather ingeniously keep the donations unattainable to others. The slot for money you see in the photo is about 5” wide. We collect everything you can imagine in them, from foreign currencies to notes to buttons, screws, litter and so on. Years ago one of the friars was emptying the donations for St. Anthony Bread for the poor. Surprise!!! Someone took the title literally and emptied an entire loaf of sliced bread into that slot, slice by slice, just like a toaster, and topped off the offering with the wrapper! You open your doors to the world and… Over the years I’ve seen people have very animated conversations with saints. Out loud. A security guard had to escort a man out of church once as his talk to Mary became obscene. One man was so angry with Jesus that he pulled the statue of the Infant of Prague off its base; that takes a lot of anger to rip off a marble statue cemented to a marble base! And that was early in the morning. People in grief hold the hand of Mary or the dead body of the Lord at the Pieta shrine, pouring out tears and prayers for support. I saw a man climb up to tickle St. Francis on the chin; and somebody actually took up residence in one of the organ pipe chambers because we found McDonald’s wrappers and other evidence of overnight stays. People drop flowers at the Little Flower and elsewhere, they put coins in the hands of St. Jude’s statue or behind him and always express their unique relationship with God in their own unique ways. A long time ago I decided that I like the fact that most all of our statues are on floor level and very approachable. It does present challenges when a certain saint demands everyone’s attention on her or his feast (traffic jams) or heavy lipstick leaves a skid mark or a homeless man washes his shirt in the Baptismal font. But the saints are significant additions to our fundamental relationship with God in Christ and St. Peter’s has been and will be a great place for all kinds of people to express personal devotion. A healthy Catholicism, again, balances personal piety and prayer with our public, liturgical celebrations of the Sacraments. As we gradually reopen the doors and extend our hours for sacraments, private prayer, programs, counseling and so on, we do have to stand back from the business and craziness that is St. Peter’s and simply smile, rejoice and give thanks that we can see and witness the power of God at work in thousands and thousands of people from around the globe! Sometimes we can only laugh or even get angry but most of the time we simply stand in awe of the Mystery of God present in people. Which leads to this invitation we friars and staff of St.

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