Positive Psychology 24 the Good Common Room 26 New Heads
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Issue 01 | March 2011 Vol. 04 | Quarterly Magazine IN THIS ISSUE 03 Happiness is No Regrets 14 50th Anniversary of CHSHA 18 Early Findings on the Effects of Boarding School 22 Positive Psychology 24 The Good Common Room 26 New Heads In proud partnership with CONTENTS Secondly, a private education is generally Boarding School not a statement of wealth but of priority. With 02 Chairman’ s Report – the advent of low-fee schools, access to Boarding School Funding non-government schools is being provided 03 Happiness is No Regrets Funding to those with quite modest incomes. Thirdly, 04 Obligation to Report every child educated in a non-government Sexual Abuse school saves the government money. 06 Bullying is an Expensive Problem AUTHOR Dr T F Hawkes, Chairman The debate over the funding of non- 07 SA Boarding Schools Unite for Australian Boarding Schools Association government schools tends to polarise along Professional Development ideological grounds. There are those who 08 How Do You Eat An Elephant? believe in needs-based funding (the needier – A Lesson in Goal Setting There is a lot of bluster in the current the school, the more the funding) and 10 Developing a Long and debate on non-government school funding there are those who believe in entitlement- Trusting Relationship with and misinformation is running riot. based funding (all are entitled to some Indigenous Students share of the education tax dollar). 12 Cathedral Survives the By only quoting the funding that comes Wrath of Cyclone Yasi from the Federal Government, rather We need to honour both positions in any 14 50th Anniversary of CHSHA than acknowledging that school funding funding model. This is not impossible. is a product of both Federal and State 17 The Bicycle Book John Howard’s social economic status Governments, the enemies of non- (SES) model introduced in 2001 achieved 18 Early Findings on the Effects government schools have 40% of Australians this goal before the system became of Boarding School believing that the Government gives more hopelessly compromised by nearly 50% 20 Westwinster Jubilee money to non-government than state of non-government schools being exempt 21 Scholarest Innovations schools. The truth is that the Government the need to abide by its guidelines. 22 Positive Psychology gives much less money to non-government 24 The Good Common Room schools. It is also being alleged that non- A needs-based funding model, if pursued 26 New Heads government schools take money away to its logical conclusion, could see rich from state schools. This view needs to be families paying more for their children’s ON THE COVER challenged. Non-government schools save education irrespective of whether they attend Girl boarders at The Catherdal the Government many hundreds of millions a state school or not. An entitlement-based School Townsville after the of dollars it would otherwise have to spend funding model, if pursued to its logical Cyclone Yasi cleanup. to educate these students in state schools. conclusion, could see the introduction of a voucher system. Both are likely to Contact US There have been complaints of limited attract significant opposition. However, I financial transparency in non-government am in favour of fiscal transparency which, Australian Boarding Schools schools. This is a selective complaint. For if enforced, might lead to an accurate Association Ltd. those in any doubt, I invite them to try and revelation of the amount of monies spent on Po Box 279 Virginia Qld 4014 find out how much the Government spends each and every school, state or private. P + 61 4 2555 7672 on each of its selective state schools. There F + 61 7 3863 2881 has even been some hysteria about the Whatever one’s pet grumble about funding, E [email protected] rising fees on non-government schools any chosen model must respect need www.boarding.org.au without referencing these fee increases to and entitlement, must not favour one state schools, whose costs, in many cases, sector of education over another, and have not increased in a dissimilar fashion. must be annexed to accountability. The proportion of children being educated In closing, it needs to be recognised in non-government schools is increasing. that there is virtue in looking at ways of Already about 50% of secondary school multiplying the educational budget rather students in metropolitan areas of Australia than squabbling over its division. It is also are being educated in non-government important to recognise that increased funding schools. Are these parents to be pilloried for will not necessarily solve all the problems paying for their children’s education? I would in schools. Many problems are a result of suggest not. They are exercising a choice, other issues such as poor management, which, if denied, would gift Government with indifferent morale and an inadequate a monopoly on education it doesn’t deserve. devolution of responsibility to schools. TO ORDER VISIT WWW.BOARDING.ORG.AU 2 3 never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried Happiness is as a result. We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you no are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy Regrets relationship from your life. Either way, you win. 4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends - Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks AUTHOR and it was not always possible to track them Dr Bronnie Ware down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the Here are the most common five: time and effort that they deserved. Everyone 1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true misses their friends when they are dying. to myself, not the life others expected of me - This was the most common regret of all. It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to When people realise that their life is almost let friendships slip. But when you are faced over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to with your approaching death, the physical see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. details of life fall away. People do want to Most people have had not honored even a get their financial affairs in order if possible. half of their dreams and had to die knowing But it is not money or status that holds the that it was due to choices they had made, true importance for them. They want to get or not made. It is very important to try and things in order more for the benefit of those honor at least some of your dreams along they love. Usually though, they are too ill the way. From the moment that you lose your and weary to ever manage this task. It is health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom all comes down to love and relationships very few realise, until they no longer have it. in the end. That is all that remains in the Top Five Regrets of the Dying final weeks; love and relationships. 2. I wish I didn’t work so hard - This came from every male patient that I For many years I worked in palliative care. 5. I wish that I had let myself be happier - nursed. They missed their children’s youth My patients were those who had gone This is a surprisingly common one. Many and their partner’s companionship. Women home to die. Some incredibly special times did not realise until the end that happiness also spoke of this regret. But as most were were shared. I was with them for the last is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old from an older generation, many of the female three to twelve weeks of their lives. patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ patients had not been breadwinners. All of of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, the men I nursed deeply regretted spending People grow a lot when they are faced as well as their physical lives. Fear of change so much of their lives on the treadmill of a with their own mortality. I learned never had them pretending to others, and to work existence. By simplifying your lifestyle to underestimate someone’s capacity for themselves, that they were content. When and making conscious choices along the growth. Some changes were phenomenal. deep within, they longed to laugh properly way, it is possible to not need the income Each experienced a variety of emotions, and have silliness in their life again. that you think you do. And by creating more as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, space in your life, you become happier more denial and eventually acceptance. When you are on your death bed, what and more open to new opportunities, Every single patient found their peace before others think of you is a long way from your ones more suited to your new lifestyle. they departed though, every one of them. mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying. 3. I wish I’d had the courage When questioned about any regrets they to express my feelings - had or anything they would do differently, Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose Many people suppressed their feelings in common themes surfaced again and again.