The panoptic campus: how the university watches your every move / p. 13

ScoMo wants your urine: Down the rabbit hole: Macron: airy fluff for rich peo- what the 2017 budget means we watched the Red Pill ple or the saviour of European for students / p. 4 so you didn’t have to / p. 9 liberal centrism? / p. 10 S1W10 / FIRST PUBLISHED 1929 PUBLISHED S1W10 / FIRST

HONI SOIT LETTERS Acknowledgement of Country Fan mail Got mail? Send your irreverent takes We acknowledge the traditional custodians of this land, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. The University of Sydney – where we write, publish and distribute amount red pocket money in a group and reverent rants to editors@ Honi Soit – is on the sovereign land of these people. As students and journalists, we recognise our complicity in the ongoing colonisation of Indigenous land. In Budget woes Hard pill to chat on Wechat, which to everyone recognition of our privilege, we vow to not only include, but to prioritise and centre the experiences of Indigenous people, and to be reflective when we fail to. We with a basic concept of how group honisoit.com by 12pm each recognise our duty to be a counterpoint to the racism that plagues the mainstream media, and to adequately represent the perspectives of Indigenous students at Dear Editors, swallow chats on wechat work would know Friday for publication. Keep it our University. We also wholeheartedly thank our Indigenous reporters for the continuing contribution of their labour to our learning. it’s the payment for posting an adver- Like many, I am concerned with the fee What’s bizarre is that at this Uni- tisement in a group chat. As for the under 300 words and include increases for students, and the funding versity we’re educated to engage in chalking content, if a cultural joke your name, degree, year and if Who made this cuts to universities, in the budget. I am informed, constructive discourse that is not even acceptable then I would Editorial Contents also dismayed governments rhetoric can negotiate both aspects of a topic have to say please go do some re- you were a kitchen utensil which of saying that the “cost of the cuts will before we draw conclusions, yet con- search about it before coming to such one would you be and why. Letters / 2 edition happen? be partially paid for by students”. In sistently find advocates on either end ridiculous decision! reality, students will pay more, universi- of the spectrum descend into lewd From the dizzyingly hedonistic Gold Rush that was ties will receive less, and the increased screaming matches. Shirley Duan the pre-Crash west to the liberal optimism of the News and Analysis / 4 Editor-in-Chief: Kishor Napier-Raman revenue from student fees is doing the Obama years, our generation has always been sur- Oops . . . “heavy lifting” elsewhere in the budget. Bianka Farmakis rounded by the short-lived promise of a new and Long read / 7 Editors #Progressive In publishing the Board Canidate quiz perfect world. Our orgiastic obsession with tech- Nick Bonyhady Aidan Molins Andrew Mathas we said that Question 8, “As a not- nology is just the latest such narrative of false hope. Opinion / 8 Jayce Carrano Siobhan Ryan Wrong, we are There’s nothing more progressive for-profit organisation, what happens To Elon Musk and his cabal of Silicon Valley Natassia Chrysanthos Michael Sun than hating wealthy white men, and when the USU’s annual revenue ex- snake-oil salesmen, the Internet, automation and Perspective / 9 Ann Ding Maani Truu The real issue desperate here can I just say, I hate Tom Water- ceeds its costs and liabilities?” was artificial intelligence all have the potential to eman- Justine Landis-Hanley house. If elected to the USU Board, I excluded due to no candidate an- cipate us from a life of stagnant wage slavery, and Culture / 10 Why the fuck is a piece of banana Don’t expect your letter to be pub- will ban Tom Waterhouse from cam- swering it correctly. It was in fact ex- usher humanity into a future of boundless knowl- Contributors bread $4.40 at Carslaw Kitchen? lished unless its a business student pus. In fact, I will ban all scions of cluded as the answers were too broad edge, freedom and creativity. Creative / 12 Maxim Adams, John-Patrick Asimakis, Isabella Bat- snowflake complaining that SA are horse racing and gambling dynasties. and unable to be quantified fairly. Our generation has enthusiastically swallowed tersby, Angela Collins, Nina Dillon Britton, Kurt Dil- Anon against free speech because we disa- That’s progressive. this myth. With alarming passiveness, we’ve allowed Longer read / 13 weg, Liam Donohoe, Bianca Farmakis, Hal Fowkes, greed with them. technology to co-opt every facet of our day-to-day Edward Furst, Maddy Gandhi, Eric Gonzales, Cam- We’re with Waleed. Waleed Aly for USU lives. We let Facebook tell us what to read and who SUPRA pages / 16 eron Gooley, Jennifer Horton, Jack Jacobs, Erin Jor- Angry April Holcombe to vote for. We barely raise a whimper as govern- dan, Kida Lin, Oliver Moore. ments and corporations discover our deepest, basest Caseworkers / 17 [Eds - but seriously we are starved for Zyzz forever desires. We watch while Fascists pollute our online Artists letters and will publish anything, see spaces, taking advantage of the cacophonic confu- SRC reports / 18 reacts only Jocelin Chan, Robin Eames, Matthew Fisher, Grace above, and from anyone. Help us] Don’t worry brahz [sic] MuzzSoc sion of the web age to gain a sense of political legit- Franki, Risako Katsumata, Ludmilla Nunell. may not be USU official but were are imacy. And as conventional politics falls apart, the Puzzles / 20 We are nothing if not adaptive to will of official in the heart of Zyzz and we economy uberizes, and we rush headlong into the the digital revolution (last week’s cover Lol no will always have the odd skitz [sic] fourth industrial revolution, the only thing left for us Regulars / 21 aside). Since it seems our readers prefer time around campus <3 Also the idea to cling on to are our lukewarm memes. to let out their anger via a convienient Are there any candidates who aren’t that we should merge with MADSOC Ten years from now, when your unpaid internship The Garter Press / 22 Facebook comment, over an outdated linked to career politician organisa- (proper dancers) when we are clearly has been given to a robot, don’t say I didn’t warn email letter, we are going to start pub- tions or professional activism or trying flailing lunatics was just plain ludi- you. And don’t go running to Silicon Valley for help, lishing the weekly highlights. to bribe students? crous m9s [sic]. lest you get hit in the face by a Juicero. KNR Cover image by Michael Sun. Oliver Marras USyd MuzzSoc Honi Soit, Week 10 Edition, Semester 1, 2017. Journalism is boring Je suis Zhixian We have a Disclaimer: Honi Soit is published by the Students’ Representative Council, University of Sydney, Level 1 Wentworth Building, City Road, University of Sydney NSW 2006. The SRC’s operation costs, space and administrative support are financed by the University of Sydney. Honi Soit is printed under the auspices of the SRC’s directors of “Bizarre scenes”, so classic Honi. Shocking to hear that such ridiculous podcast fan student publications: Nina Dillon-Britton, Pranay Jha, Isabella Pytka, William Ryan, Katie Thorburn, and Adam Ursino. All expressions are published on the basis that they are What is bizarre about protesting a situation happen to Zhixian as I’ve not to be regarded as the opinions of the SRC unless specifically stated. The Council accepts no responsibility for the accuracy of any of the opinions or information con- bunch of far-right women haters in been helping her for the past few > spending half an hour record- tained within this newspaper, nor does it endorse any of the advertisements and insertions. Please direct all advertising inquiries to [email protected]. MAGA hats and shirts saying “fem- days for this election and saw all the ing this > expecting people to care inism is cancer”. Your ‘objective’ hard work and dedication she puts enough to listen to half an hour of reporting is mind-numbingly boring. into this USU election. The reason talk about the union elections. given by USU board for excluding What’s on this week Eleanor Morely her ... Just because she sent a small Kerrod Gream According to your local pastor who really wants you to come to church

Fee increase protest Hack Revue and election announcement Science Cruise: The Hogwarts Express Queer Revue Interfaculty pub crawl When: Wednesday, May 17, 12pm-2pm When: Wednesday, May 17, 8pm When: Wednesday 10 March, 6pm When: May 18 - 20, 7.30pm When: Friday, May 19, 4pm Where: Outside Fisher Library Where: Manning Bar Where: Customs House Library Where: Seymour Centre Where: Cadigal Lawns Price: Free (wish the same was true for education) Price: Dignity Price: Free Price: Access $15 | Student $18 | General $20 Price: Free

When Jesus stormed into the temple courts, inter- As you would know from my teachings — well you Despite the Pagan undertones and the whole Dumb- Other pastors might avoid commenting on this one This looks like a joly time! Bringing together all rupted the proceeding by overturning tables, yell- would if you came more often, but I understand we ledore batting for the other team thing, I like Harry or comment in all the wrong ways but I am a new- the different denominations of the Arts, Sciences, ing, and driving both people and animals out of lead busy lives — “God gives grace to the humble” Potter as much as the next pastor. Just as magic can age pastor and believe in a broad church open to all Business and more. Truly, this will be a magnani- the room using a whip, he was condemning the (1 Peter 5:5). How then do we respond to such an be used to undermine the teachings of the Church, sexualities and beings (except fucking Protestants). mous occasion. May you drink deeply of the blood greed and corruption of hypocrites — because Je- explicitly self-referential, indulgent performance so too can science. So be free to go to this cruise, So suffice to say, I’m happy to turn a blind eye to the of our Lord and use Saturday to recover so that sus was a protester (John 2:13-25). Be like Jesus as one specifically by and for student politics die- and drink merrily, but protect your heart from the whole “he who lies with a man” Leviticus thing and you can come in bright and early on Sunday for (and then tell me all about it when you come to hards? Well we must respond with mercy, my son. vices, faithlessness, and temptation that science stu- have the utmost confidence that this performance mass – Don’t tell anyone, but I hear this Sunday’s the service on Sunday). So, go to this revue and the announcement of your dents may offer you. And don’t have sex with any- will be fabulous. service is going to be a ripper! USU board directors and “Be merciful, just as your one unless you marry them beforehand. Father is merciful” (Luke 6:36).

2 3 NEWSROOM NEWSROOM Professor Budget confirms cuts to universities Raising the bar elected to EDWARD FURST ERIN JORDAN Students’ university fees will increase repayment increases to a maximum longer have to pay fees upfront — in- After just three months working at a gerous, according to Rebecca. When I had made-up the problem. I started by 7.5 per cent and the Higher Ed- 10 per cent for graduates earning over stead, they will have access to HELP bar, Emma* decided to quit her job. things go wrong after a couple of to almost believe him,” she said. prestigious ucation Loan Program (HELP) debt $120,000. loans and be able to defer payment. Despite a generous pay packet, Emma pints, female bar attendants are in In these cases, the responsibility for repayment threshold will be reduced Universities will also face a 2.5 per CSPs for domestic students will be ex- swore her nights of hearing constant many cases left with little training or a safe environment for all bar attend- to $42,000, the budget confirmed on cent efficiency dividend (read: funding tended to include sub-bachelor level lewd jokes about being “bent over” support to deal with the abuse. ants seems to fall squarely on wom- science Tuesday, May 9. cut) over the next two years, that will degrees such as diplomas and associ- and demands for “sexual favours” and Jordana learnt this one Tuesday en’s ability to know if who they are In a big-spending budget variously see resources stretched. While most ate degrees, and will also cover indus- “dates” by both customers and her evening when she was left tending serving will take their friendliness as a described as ‘populist’, ‘pragmatic’ and of the Group of 8 (Go8) universities, try placement units that earn credit co-workers were over. the bar alone. “I decided to pick up sign of warranted sexual advancement ‘Labor lite’, universities are among the including the University of Sydney, towards tertiary qualifications. “It was actually a difficult decision, some empty glasses on a table where a or whether they are ordinary patrons society 9 out of 10 female hospitality workers few substantial losers. Meanwhile, have fairly healthy finances, the divi- With regards to affordable housing, which may seem surprising to some group of tradies were sitting. As I bent not looking for trouble. have experienced some form of sexual ISABELLA BATTERSBY schools, the National Disability Insur- dend’s impact will be felt most keenly the budget provides little solace, as Syd- given the circumstances,” said Emma. down to pick them up a few made Rebecca said that she wishes her harassment while at work. ance Scheme (NDIS), and infrastruc- by poorer universities. In particular, ney house prices continue their skyward “But ultimately the money and flexi- some derogatory comments but one male co-workers would sometimes Source: United Voice On Monday, May 8, University of Syd- ture projects make up the big-ticket the eight universities around Australia trajectory. The proposed First Home Su- bility of the hours just didn’t cut it for tradie decided to stand up from his help to alleviate this burden. ney biology Professor Edward Holmes spending items that represent an ide- (all non-Go8 members) that reported per Saver Scheme will see savers eligi- me anymore when I started to be har- seat, press his erect penis into my leg “I feel like if I complain, my friend was elected as a Fellow of The Royal ological backflip by the Coalition and funding deficits in 2015 will now face ble to deposit up to $30,000 of pre-tax assed by my boss too.” and whisper in my ear how ‘my tight who I work with he’s like ‘just deal Society, a prestigious group of highly appear to have snookered Labor in key further financial stress. Charles Darwin income into their superannuation ac- In pubs and clubs around Australia, While the application of the gen- pants were turning him on’.” with it,” she said. successful science, medicine and tech- policy areas. University in the Northern Territory, counts and take advantage of the asso- Emma’s experience is not an isolated der-neutral term “bar attendant” has New and afraid of causing a fuss, Often male co-workers like to be nology academics from the Common- As previously reported, the amount for example, reported a $26.2 million ciated tax concessions as they save for a one. A 2017 survey conducted by trade been implemented across the board, Jordana never reported the incident to rostered on with women because they wealth and United Kingdom. students contribute to university fees deficit in 2015 and will now face $3 house deposit. But this provides modest union United Voice found that nine the possibility that reality does not re- her manager. are likely to be tipped more, Rebecca Current Fellows of the society in- will increase by 1.82 per cent per year million in efficiency dividends over the assistance at best to cash-strapped mil- out of 10 female hospitality workers flect this change is rarely discussed. On reflection, Jordana believes explains. When this is the under- clude Stephen Hawking and Tim Bern- from 2018, reaching a total increase of next two years. lennials and is more like putting a hand- had experienced some form of sexual Smiling, flirting, and playing to old alerting the security guards who help standing, it seems unlikely that male ers-Lee (inventor of the Internet), and 7.5 per cent by 2022. The increase in These reforms are still a far cry from rail on a precipitously steep cliff face. harassment while at work. These in- stereotypes of women not liking beer monitor the bar’s more unruly pa- co-workers would step up to interfere. Alan Turing, Albert Einstein and Isaac student contributions will be matched the heavy-hitting 2014 budget that Other measures to dampen foreign in- stances ranged from sexist comments, feature as part of this new reality, ac- trons, rather than management, is the When raising the bar across the Newton were admitted in the past. by a proportional decrease in govern- sought to cut university funding by 20 vestment in the housing market are like- to bullying and sexual assault. While cording to Rebecca*, a full-time stu- only effective way to deal with these board, management should be on the Holmes’ election to the Society ment contributions, meaning on av- per cent, deregulate course fees, and wise expected to only marginally help. sexism is yet to be eradicated in soci- dent and casual bartender. Financial kinds of assaults. receiving end of criticism. The imple- involved a peer-review process that erage students will pay 46 per cent of introduce a rate of interest on student Welfare payments remain largely ety, there seems to be an industry-spe- incentives and job security are factors She wasn’t alone in expressing this. mentation of training programs for focuses on electing those who have their total degree cost as opposed to 42 loans; measures now officially scrapped. unchanged as eligibility requirements cific ‘culture’ that is responsible for that influence her decision to continue According to the United Voice survey, bar attendants on how to deal with achieved excellence within the science per cent currently. The fee increases will It also marks a more cautious approach and funding levels remain untouched. such high incidences of harassment. taking part in this façade or “act”, as 48 per cent of female employees found these situations would create a system field and have contributed to develop- affect all students regardless of their from the Turnbull government that con- The main proposal involves introducing Jordana* started working at an RSL she describes it. their employers didn’t take their work- of support that would make sexual ing natural knowledge. study start date. sequently gives the legislation more random drug tests for welfare recipients when she had just turned 18. She says “I know that when I’m in a place harassment seriously. assault less common. Awareness and “I’m known for explaining how vi- The income threshold at which grad- chance of being passed in the senate. that the government deems at risk of she was “very innocent and ... took cheerier mood and therefore come When faced with the difficult deci- harsher protocols might help us bid ruses evolve and working out exactly uates will be required to repay their Other changes to higher education substance abuse, with payments with- many months to adjust to the world across as flirtier, I’ll get tipped better, sion to report the case of sexual har- good-bye to outdated sexist attitudes. how they do what they do,” Holmes debt will be reduced from the current include the end of Commonwealth held if drug use is detected. This will be of bar work”. which ultimately works in my favour,” assment to upper management, Emma I’ll drink to that! told Honi. $55,000 per year to $42,000. However, Supported Places (CSPs) places at applicable to people receiving Newstart Australian pubs have historically said Rebecca. decided to do so, but no one listened. He has uncovered the origin and the rate of initial repayment will also be universities for New Zealand citi- and Youth Allowance payments and will been sites of sexist abuse towards fe- When alcohol is in the mix, this “The manager just joked with me, *NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED. evolution of influenza, HIV and reduced from the current four per cent zens and permanent residents from begin as a trial next year. male workers, once called “barmaids”. playful act could easily become dan- and called me a ‘princess’, he acted like dengue, as well as their molecular of income to one per cent. The rate of 2018 onwards. However, they will no epidemiology, which means he discov- ered the environmental determinants behind the diseases. Election regulations culturally insensitive Recently, he unveiled 1500 new USyd grad vying to be next Bondi Vet viruses, including new families. KIDA LIN His research has also led to more CAMERON GOOLEY accurate assessments of which viruses On Monday, the University of Syd- of “money, employment, position or turning Officer’s claim that “there chalking of “办证” and “迷药” is prob- are more likely to come from within University of Sydney graduate James ney Union (USU) Electoral Arbiter material resources” in exchange for is nothing to suggest that the im- lematic even if it did not merit a termi- human populations, and understand- Crowley is one of many veterinarians announced that Zhixian Wang, an in- “preferential treatment or to induce putations were conveyed in jest” al- nation of Wang’s candidature. First, the ing of the main mechanisms of virus across Australia vying to become the ternational student from China run- a voter to vote or to refrain from vot- ways seemed untenable. Candidates connotations of these phrases normalise evolution, species-to-species transmis- new host of popular television show ning to be a Board Director, who had ing or to vote in a particular way”. should not be expected to explicitly appalling and illegal behaviours such sion and how viruses spread within Bondi Vet. been excluded from the election for The Electoral Arbiter’s decision in- state where they are making a joke. as sexual assaults. Appropriating these new hosts. Channel 10 is searching for a breaching electoral rules, would be dicates that such a small amount of If they were, one would expect the phrases undermines efforts to fight Holmes is also a Fellow of the Na- replacement for current host Dr reinstated. money involved in this case would memes, which have been clogging against gender violence on campus. Sec- tional Health and Medical Research Chris Brown as the show enters its Two complaints were filed against not constitute “indirect bribery” for Facebook newsfeeds over the last ond, it exposes some students to mes- Council and the Australian Academy 10th season. Wang, and both were initially ruled to be “preferential treatment”. week to come with a disclaimer. Fur- sages that might potentially harm them. of Science, and was awarded the Sci- Applications have flooded in from sufficient for her exclusion. The Return- With regard to the chalking, most thermore, a series of “666666” were What’s worse, the fact that they appear entific Medal of the Zoological Society around the country, with colleagues, ing Officer found Wang had breached debates focus on the meanings of “办 painted next to the phrases, which in public spaces means people are less of London in 2003. friends and clients nominating their USU Regulation 8.10.1 (l) regarding 证” and “迷药”. The literal translations to some extent indicates the satirical prepared to deal with them. Finally, “It feels marvellous, really a great favourite vets. bribery in her use of “Red Packets” to of “办证” and “迷药” are “forging IDs”, nature of the chalking. such messages contribute to a misun- honour,” he said about his admission Crowley, a graduate of the class send money to a group of international and “drugs that create hallucinations” Irrespective of whether the original derstanding of foreign cultures and the to the society. of 2012 and current staff member of students on WeChat. He also ruled that respectively. In China, where these decision to exclude Wang was justified, stigmatisation of international students. According to Holmes, it is not the University of Sydney Emergency one of her chalkings, which contained phrases are often painted in public this incident shows the inadequacy of Framing some negative elements as something you aspire to, but it is great Vet Clinic, believes his five years of Chinese phrases “办证” and “迷药”, vio- spaces accompanied by a phone num- existing mechanism to cope with dis- an essential part of Chinese culture, as to be recognised by peers within the professional media experience and lated Regulation 8.10.1(p)(ii) for being ber, they usually allude to a means to putes. Firstly, many regulations do not many of Wang’s defenders have done, academic field, as becoming a Fel- easygoing nature set him apart from “misleading or deceptive, or likely to be obtain fake IDs and date rape drugs. account for the use of online platforms. could perpetuate racial misconceptions low is more like, “a career award ... his competitors. misleading or deceptive”. If “misleading or deceptive” is inter- Messaging Apps like WeChat, popular and distortions. The Returning Officer’s recognition of my 30 years dedicated Crowley told Honi, “I have the right In their successful challenge to both preted to mean that students believe among Chinese international students, original decision could therefore be un- to science.” balance between technical expertise, determinations, Wang and her cam- are likely to believe that they can ob- have become the prime campaigning derstood not as a retrospective punish- Vice Chancellor Michael Spence veterinary knowledge, and personal- paign argued that the amount of money tain these illegal items from a USU channels for many candidates. This ment, but as a deterrent that aims to congratulated Holmes on his fellow- ity that is important for being a good sent in the Wechat group, equivalent to candidate in Sydney, the decision to calls for more nuanced regulations to send a message to other candidates. ship in a statement and said, “This is veterinarian in the media”. $2 AUD, is too minimal to constitute reverse the Returning Officer’s deci- prevent unfair campaign practices. The With more and more international Image courtesy of James Crowley an extremely high and rare accolade, “I think I’ll be able to give a good bribery. They believed it to only be a sion makes sense. It could be expected “Red Packet” function on Wechat, for students becoming involved in student one that Professor Holmes absolutely representation of the vet industry ney gained traction in the mainstream small screen. small advertisement fee — similar to that most people with some knowl- instance, allows users to conduct on- politics, similar cases are only more deserves following a career devoted to and the world behind the doors of media, prompting his friends to nomi- He is also a co-host of I’m a Celeb- what people pay to boost their posts edge of Chinese language and culture line transactions. Importantly, people likely to arise in the future. Ultimately, understanding human diseases for the the vet clinic.” nate him for the position. rity Get Me Out of Here and a travel on Facebook. They also contended the will consider the chalking an atten- can exchange the virtual money they this incident emphasises the need for benefit of humankind”. Crowley has experience in print and Since then, numerous satisfied cli- reporter on The Living Room. phrases graffitied are common in China tion-grabbing campaign tactic. receive for actual currency and they reform of the current regulations and Holmes added, “[it] reflects the online media, and has himself appeared ents have testified to Crowley’s aptitude When Honi asked how he com- and people with some knowledge of The fact that the phrases were can send red packets to both groups (as greater cultural sensitivity in order to world-class medical science being per- on the Today show and Nova FM radio. for the role on the Bondi Vet website. pares to Brown, Crowley joked, “In the context are unlikely to be misled. in Chinese also demonstrates clear occurred in this case) and individuals. better accommodate this change. formed at the University of Sydney.” An Allambie Vet Facebook Brown left the show after nine the looks department I’ve got blonde The current USU Regulations ban intent to only target those familiar In addition, more culturally sensi- DISCLAIMER: KIDA LIN IS campaign following former patient years to focus on his career in the vet hair, but I’m not as tall and my jaw- any forms of bribery, direct or indi- with the language and broader con- tive rules need to be made to prevent CAMPAIGNING FOR LILIANA TAI. Oscar the Fat Cat’s weight loss jour- clinic and further opportunities on the line isn’t as strong”. rect. Bribery is defined as the use textual meaning. Moreover, the Re- inappropriate campaigning tactics. The

4 5 NEWSROOM LONG READ Academic Board restructure following A bloody good time faculty mergers JUSTINE LANDIS-HANLEY / When menstruation is considered a cause for celebration I got my first period, ironically, during my high In many cultures though, celebrations for a per- next days they were having a huge ceremony for her JOHN-PATRICK ASIMAKIS school Sex-Ed exam. son’s first menstrual cycle are not simply tradition: with flowers, all dressed up in a Sari.” By age 15, I had written-off any hope that I would they’re ritual. Raman said that, as a young woman in India at the This semester has marked the begin- makeup will be after January. The University spokesperson clar- requirements might, for instance, ever start menstruating. I was built on angular lines, **** time, she thought this was “absolutely barbaric”. ning of the University of Sydney’s A university spokesperson told ified that the changes “will not affect be significant in education and so- physically; flat-chested, always; and wore my sexual Harsha Sonseka, a 21-year-old student of Sinha- “It was an announcement of her readiness to be transition to a reduced number of fac- Honi that documents to “define the courses or units of study, or the way cial work courses handling sensitive inexperience plainly, the same way I wore my uni- lese heritage, experienced a week-long Sri Lankan married, if you look at it in a very pragmatic way.” ulties, as part of a broader restructure. composition of the Academic Board” in which they are taught,” adding issues like child protection, which form. I craved a sign that I wasn’t broken according ritual and celebration when she first got her period For many Jewish girls, your first period doesn’t call Several faculty mergers and de- following the transitional period that “there is no impact to classes, should require near-total attendance to bodily convention. at age 11. for a party, but often a trip to the local Mikveh – a bath motions will see the total number of were “still in draft form and are teachers or student administration from students. But when I held up the contents of my underwear “When you get your period, you are confined to an used for the purpose of ritual immersion in Judaism. faculties down from 16 to just six by likely to be considered for approval as a result of the new structure.” Similar issues may arise as the uni- alongside Kaz Cooke’s Girl Stuff, I concluded that this area where you don’t see any men – including your USyd student, Noa Zulman, visited a Mikvah with her the start of next year, following a de- at the [Board’s] next meeting.” While the spokesperson conceded versity attempts to strike a balance was it: I was parting the red sea, birthing a blood di- brothers or your father,” she tells me. school as a way of familiarising the girls with the place cision made by the University Senate In addition to the impacts on the “the process of integration [of edu- between overarching faculty rules amond, surfing the crimson wave. I swallowed my “Your parents go to your birth location at your birth they would visit at the start of each monthly cycle. in December 2015. Board’s makeup, the restructure poses cation and social work] is just com- and course-specific considerations. swelling sense of sudden self-worth as a new, unantic- time with someone who reads your horoscope. They “You are not allowed to have sex during your pe- The reduction in faculties will questions for the experiences of stu- mencing,” she emphasised that “[a] This year’s transition to a reduced ipated challenge dawned: telling my mum. [tell] you the time [to] have your shower, and the col- riod,” Zulman explains. likely involve a significant alteration dents and academics at a University cademic staff will continue the deliv- number of faculties also involves a I leant against the bathroom doorway while she our you wear afterwards.” “At the end of your period, you can’t have sex for to the membership of the Academic with larger, more integrated faculties. ery of all aspects of the education and considerable enlargement of the Fac- clipped her toenails. When Soneska first menstruated, she wasn’t al- five days either. You go to a Mikveh and fully sub- Board, the body responsible for main- What was until last year the Fac- social work curriculum within the ulty of Science, which has now sub- “I think I got my period today.” I tossed the words lowed to leave her room until having her ‘shower’. At merge yourself three times and say a prayer.” taining and promoting standards of ulty of Education and Social Work new faculty” and that there would be sumed the former Faculty of Veteri- aside, as if they didn’t matter to me. the sacred hour, her mother washed her in what she Menstruating women are not allowed to touch reli- research, teaching and learning. has been demoted to form the sixth “significant consultation with staff on nary Science and the former Faculty “Really?!” She looked up, eyes wide. I grimaced. remembers now as “some leaves and water”, before gious documents, like the Torah, or go to Temple. Ra- The Board also oversees the de- school within the University’s Fac- all aspects of the integration of ad- of Agriculture and Environment. “I mean…” her voice deeper, “…oh really?” She she was dressed in a gown her family had chosen; in man and Soneska speak of similar restrictions in South velopment and regular review of ac- ulty of Arts and Social Sciences, ministrative processes.” The restructure also envisages a snipped another nail. her case, light blue, her favourite colour. She bowed to Asian practices. ademic policies and procedures. equal, for example, to the School of Although the transition will not substantial amalgamation of the Fac- Mum inspected the stain, as I had, and came to the her parents and touched their feet, and they gifted her “Period blood is seen as impure, sort of, and you In March, the Board voted down a Literature, Art and Media. affect teaching, transitional provi- ulties of Medicine, Dentistry, Phar- same conclusion. a gold necklace and bangles because “in our culture, need to cleanse yourself before you can engage in sex- proposal to reduce the length of aca- USyd student, Selin Ağacayak, sions will render void all resolutions macy, and Nursing and Midwifery. “Welcome to womanhood, darling!” she exclaimed, when you become a woman, gold is very important”. ual intercourse again.” demic semesters to 12 weeks. who is in her third year of secondary of faculties which are being sub- A University spokesperson con- spinning around, arms wide open, to pull me into a Soneska then fed her parents a version of sticky rice “Not to mention,” Zulman adds, “it means you are At present, the Board’s extensive education, believes education and sumed within other faculties, unless firmed that “preparatory work to im- hug. I squirmed against it. — Dad and Mum first, then her siblings in order from only having sex for two weeks every month, during the membership includes the deans of social work form an area of study they are “ratified or amended by the plement the new Faculty … is under- “Right, sorry,” her voice deepened again. She put oldest to youngest. point in your cycle that you are most fertile. Judaism all faculties as well as one elected distinct from that of the arts and so- receiving faculty” before 8 January way and the implementation date will one hand on her hip and exaggeratedly waggled a fin- “And then you have your party,” she says matter- doesn’t encourage the use of contraception, and wants student from each faculty. cial sciences, but acknowledges that next year. be agreed in the next few months.” ger at me with the other: “No more unprotected sex of-factly. people to go forth and procreate, so these practices However, following a University “together they work well” and that As a result, pending the ratifica- Although the “current structure for you!” I rolled my eyes. Soneska’s parents invited around fifty family and align with the religious conception of sexual purpose.” Senate resolution that entered into they do “inform each other.” tion by the Faculty of Arts and Social [of the existing faculties] remains “Now, do you know how to put on a pad?” friends to their house for a dinner party. **** force on 15 December last year, the “Although I think [the faculties] Sciences, the former Faculty of Edu- until a date to be advised,” the And that was it. According to some gendered con- But, as another friend tells me, many families rent It can be easy to write-off these traditions as exam- provisions that specify the Board’s should be kept separate, I don’t cation and Social Work’s resolutions spokesperson also confirmed that ception of biology, I had entered a new phase in my out great halls and invite hundreds of people: “it pays ples of patriarchal domination and ingrained sexism. composition “are suspended.” have any pressing issues with [the mandating 90 per cent attendance the new faculty, which will be called life, gifted with the purpose of procreation. For all of for itself, though,” my friend laughs, “given the amount But Raman argues the significance of the menarche The resolution does, however, merger],” Ağacayak said. at timetabled lectures, seminars and the Faculty of Medicine and Health, the school-camp chat and Hollywood hype, my blos- of money and gifts the guests bring.” ritual depends on the paradigm through which one stipulate that current Academic Ağacayak’s experiences corrobo- tutorials will cease to have effect and “will not be established before Se- soming into so called ‘womanhood’ was commemo- Dr Shanti Raman, who undertook research into considers them. “If you look at it from an anthropo- Board members will keep their posi- rate the University’s insistence that will be replaced by the minimum mester 1 2018.” rated with nothing more than an awkward embrace the intercultural identity of Tamils living in Australia logical perspective, it is almost certain the backdrop tions for the rest of the current term, “the changes should have little im- 80 per cent attendance expectation and a receipt for $9.50 worth of StayFresh. as part of a PhD, says that the menstrual ceremony is coming from Ancient fertility rituals of some sort. which ends on 8 January 2018. pact on course delivery” and “day-to- which binds Arts students. Sex-Ed class had done little to normalise my is equally celebrated in South India and amongst Sri When I talked to my children about this, they thought It is unclear what the Board’s day interaction with the University.” Reduced mandatory attendance monthly bleeding. When the pharmacist handed over Lankan Tamils. it was terrible and gendered — that it was a way of the packet of pads, carefully wrapped up in a paper “I grew up in South India as a fairly urban person getting a girl ready for marriage!” bag with the edges cellophane-taped, I couldn’t help with no particular knowledge or involvement with this “I think culture is all about change, and cultural but feel the need to tuck the package under my arm sort of ceremony. One time, when I was about eight, we practices change and morph according to context. You and avert my gaze. Every month, I put off the text to were visiting our ancestors’ village and were invited to can look at it as a celebration of reproductive power Mum asking for more ‘supplies’ until I had scraped a young girl’s ceremony… we never imagine someone and sexuality. These are celebratory rituals and they SUSF President campaigned on free my schoolbag for a misplaced liner. Once a month, I would have a ceremony to celebrate menarche. This do actually mark particular biological transitions and fumbled with the pink, flowered wrapper in the toilets girl, who must have been twelve or something, was that is important to acknowledge. Why shouldn’t we between class, terrified that the tear of plastic would just crying her heart out the night before. And in the celebrate the first period? Why should we think of it as gym membership for college kids alert the surrounding stalls to the change within me. I a terrible thing? [Getting your period] is a life of pain quickly realised that even if they could tell, my school ‘I think culture is all about change, and misery, but why not celebrate it?” she laughs. LIAM DONOHOE friends were either too embarrassed or uninterested and cultural practices change and The practice of South Asian menstrual rituals takes themselves to say anything. on a new significance for migrant families living in Last Tuesday, Honi reported that The student suggests that his It seems that the promised gym Amid recent bribery allegations in **** morph according to context. You can Australia: they are a way for maintaining cultural con- James Flynn had been elected as the competitor, former SUSF vice-presi- memberships, worth at least $400 the Union Board elections, there are It’s both comforting and concerning to learn that look at it as a celebration of repro- tinuity and generational strength. “You can see that new Sydney University Sport and dent David Jordan, is “not a fan of a year per student, would be an ex- concerns that Flynn’s actions consti- other menstruators traded white underwear for [through these practices] we are here and we are still Fitness (SUSF) President, receiv- colleges” before reiterating Flynn’s tension on the existing automatic tute a breach of regulations. anxiety on the cusp of adolescence: a study con- ductive power and sexuality’ Tamils or whatever, and we are still proud of being ing over eight times the votes of his commitment to free gym member- annual membership that college stu- Subsection 28(l) of SUSF’s ‘Voting ducted by the International Women’s Health Coa- who we are and we are distinct”, Raman says. nearest rival. ships for college students. dents receive. Procedures at Annual Election’ unam- lition and menstrual health app Clue found that Notably, both Raman and Soneska say the girls Since then, sources have disclosed A-frames promoting Flynn’s cam- If the scheme applies to Paul’s biguously defines bribery as any act people who menstruate are embarrassed by their they know have enjoyed their celebrations. that Flynn, a Liberal staffer for MP paign were spotted around St Paul’s alone, roughly 197 students will re- that involves “promising to give ma- periods. Shocker. “Personally I think it is kind of cool, not Anthony Roberts, offered college stu- College, while campaign flyers were ceive the memberships, costing in terial resources to induce a voter.” But it seems attitudes towards a girl’s to mention you receive gifts and gold. In dents free gym memberships if elected. slid under doors at Paul’s and widely excess of $78,000. To be sure, the promise may not first menstrual cycle have evolved. The our culture, you feel as though people An anonymous source said Flynn, circulated at Women’s College. If the scheme applies to all college differ from any other kind of cam- internet went wild with praise when stop seeing you as a little kid, and give “basically promised free gym mem- The targeted campaign and subse- students, then at least 1,554 stu- paign promise that pledges to im- Buzzfeed reported a Florida mum you a bit more responsibility. I feel that bership to all college kids” during a quent college turnout will likely play dents will receive memberships at a prove “material resources” to induce threw her daughter a surprise “period it is kind of an important time to cele- speech Flynn delivered at St Paul’s into longstanding perceptions that cost of $621,000. a voter. party” featuring pizza and a chocolate brate — you are ‘becoming a woman’ formal dinner, one that was subse- SUSF and the colleges have a rather Either way, the promise seems an Flynn called the suggestion that cake with ‘Congrats on your Period’ writ- as everyone says,” Soneska muses. quently endorsed by the college’s cosy relationship. expensive one to deliver on, repre- his actions amount to bribery a “ri- ten in red and white frosting. The Period **** senior student. It is unclear whether All college students are given a senting a significant share of SUSF’s diculous claim”. Story, a monthly sanitary product delivery “Who has it worse during puberty: Flynn intends to offer free gym mem- $60 annual membership of SUSF. $4.3 million SSAF allocation. He also made a similar point to service, actually launched their brand with boys or girls?” berships to non-college members of It has been alleged that this No doubt many will question this, arguing that the scheme was a fully catered menstrual themed party. I penned an answer to the final question the University community. scheme helps SUSF stack their elec- whether it is an effective or fair use a “policy promise in the same way HelloFlo’s marketing took the opposite approach, of my Sex-Ed exam as I bled in my shorts for the In addition to the speech, screen- tions by guaranteeing a large cohort of student money. members of the SRC or USU make creating a viral Youtube video around the idea of first time. shots from the St Paul’s internal of voters who are, generally, sympa- Flynn told Honi he is “going to ex- policy promises in their elections”. a ‘First Moon’ party. A young girl tries to fake her pe- It’s impossible to determine here whether men- Facebook group for ‘freshers’ (first thetic to the SUSF agenda. plore policies that help all students He added, “no complaints were riod while her cunning mother punishes her by throw- strual celebrations are a source of female empower- years), show a senior Paul’s student It’s clear that Flynn targeted the flourish, this includes college kids” made to the Returning Office in re- ing her an ‘embarrassing’ celebration. Her family and ment or female oppression. But I wonder whether I relaying that Flynn “cares about us” college vote at a time when the vast as part of broader efforts to improve gards to any part of the election”, friends show up, her Dad jumps out of the cake dressed would have answered differently had I felt my period and that “it would be genuinely bad majority of students were unaware “the health and wellbeing of our which is true at the time of writing. in a skin-tight red bodysuit, and guests are treated to a was worth celebrating. HS for us if he doesn’t get up.” that an election was even taking place. University community.” ‘vag-ician’ and games like ‘pin the pad on the period’. Artwork: Robin Eames 6 7 PODIUM LOOKOUT Coptic church under siege Don’t be silly, wrap MICHAEL YOUSSEF / Fighting the good fight to protect St. Mary’s your willy ... seriously St. Mary’s Coptic Church in Sydenham has a long and scheduled to proceed on 8th May. the local and NSW government has been rejected. storied history. Originally built in 1884, the site was Despite the National Trust’s description of the This unfortunate state of affairs is deeply troubling. NINA DILLON-BRITTON / With sexual health information acquired by Egyptian immigrants in 1968, making it church as being “rare and nationally significant” the It is a travesty that such a historical building is to be more accessible than ever, why is condom use declining? the first Coptic Orthodox Church outside of Egypt. council has demonstrated a profoundly stubborn ina- demolished for seemingly petty reasons. However, the Church is now under severe threat. bility to see any value in this historical building. By The Coptic community’s loss is a developer’s In 2015, Australian GPs reported a troubling spike she was often unsure Citing ‘safety concerns’ and the high cost of refur- claiming that refurbishment costs are too high, the dream. Changes to the regular flight path from in rates of sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Di- if she had taken the pill bishment, the local council plans to demolish the council has refused to take advice from two prominent Kingsford Smith Airport will see planes fly away agnoses of HIV, chlamydia and even syphilis saw an for that day and when it building. Since last year’s local council mergers, the building companies who said that the redevelopment from the church, subsequently increasing the value unprecedented increase. was effective,” he says. “It unelected Inner West Council lead by administrator would only amount to $2 million. In an effort to ame- of the large piece of land. In response, Australian Over the past few decades, contraception use meant that we still had to use Richard Pearson have showcased little intent to pre- liorate the community, Council has instead offered to Coptic Heritage and Community Services (ACHCS) increased slowly. It seemed the effects of HIV aware- condoms pretty often.” serve the Church, despite multiple requests from the create a memorial using the Church’s bricks as pave- has commenced legal action against the council. ness campaigns, Healthy Harold and more open Despite changes in contracep- local community and non-government organisations. ment. Given the incredible significance of the Church This controversy comes after the bombing of two conversations about sex were finally paying off. tive use, physical protection still For over 10 years now, Coptic Orthodox Chris- to Sydney’s Coptic community, this solution is both un- churches that killed 50 people on Palm Sunday in What healthcare professionals hadn’t bet on then remains the only way to pre- tians have been fighting to protect their church from acceptable and disrespectful. Egypt, where Coptic Christians have been victim to — with increasing awareness of STIs and increas- vent STI transmission. demolition. The community has raised $2 million On 2nd May, a suspicious fire ravaged parts of the longstanding terror. The repression faced by Chris- ing awareness around contraceptive options — was What has stood for a proposed a refurbishment of the site, which Church. While it remains under investigation, many lo- tians across the Middle East makes the government’s that condoms would suddenly become uncool. Yet in out is that con- would see a community centre, a chapel for visitors cals recall similar blazes before the council demolished reluctance to protect their culture and heritage in 2014, the annual Kirby Surveillance Reports, which dom use in the and an Egyptian Pharaonic and Coptic museum. two local heritage listed headmaster stations. Australia all the more tragic. But the 100 000 strong monitor Australian sexual health trends, found that queer commu- Despite this offer, the council declined under the In response to the fire, Pearson claimed the build- Coptic community is ready to fight. It is imperative declining condom use was leading to the increases nity is much more grounds that the development would cost $5 million ing was now too dangerous and should be demol- that all political, cultural and religious leaders take in STI rates. common than else- and thus exceed the amount donated. More recently, ished immediately. A request for an independent a stand and do the right thing. Historically, physical or ‘barrier’ protection has where. It seems that a successful court injunction halted the demolition building inspection by the Egyptian community from primarily been for the purpose of contraception. historic pushes for someone will use a condoms or not. Jamie* says she uses condoms largely because she awareness of the impor- According to Rahul*, condoms are “can’t take hormonal contraceptives because of con- tance of physical protec- seen as unnecessary by his straight male traindications”. Conversely, Rithika says that she tion, as well as the memory friends. “People don’t think getting HIV is The faraway land consistently uses physical protection because she of the AIDs epidemic, have likely, and if a girl is using birth control, then feels “uncomfortable thinking about more invasive had long lasting impacts. they don’t think they have anything to worry about,” forms of contraceptive,” and she “can’t be fucked Adrian says that his use of con- he says. A number of heterosexual people Honi talked between left and right taking the pill”. doms is largely influenced by high to agreed that condoms “just seem uncool”. Perhaps, then, the drop can be attributed to the school sex education, but also because of the In the queer community, condom use also cannot JACK JACOBS / The future of centrist politics fact that more comprehensive awareness of sexual spectre of AIDS. be taken for granted. The advent of PrEP — a new and reproductive health has also led to awareness “I think using protection feels a lot more rele- drug that greatly reduces the risk of contracting HIV Reverent strings marched Emmanuel Macron to the larger countries like the US and UK, where there lishment parties on the Right and Left, in François of alternative forms of contraceptives. Though the vant to me because I’m gay and the AIDS epidemic — has led to some health experts worrying that it lectern at the Louvre on Monday, 7 May. He had the emanating media is louder. Fillon and Benoît Hamon. More importantly, pro- pill isn’t new, its use is often at least partially accom- has such a horrible impact of the queer community may lead to a decrease in rates of condom use. just claimed historic victory against the far-right test votes against Le Pen were a significant factor panied by physical protection given the tendency of — particularly men who have sex with men,” says The work of sexual education campaigns and ac- populist Marine Le Pen. Ode to Joy, the unofficial and few French citizens actually voted for Macron’s users to forget to take it. Awareness of alternative Adrian. In not using protection, “I’m kind of letting tivists has led to robust awareness of STIs and the rallying cry of the European Union, was the song to centrist policies. His 66.1% outcome is therefore and more effective forms of contraception that only down the activists who worked so hard to make importance of protection. The worry, then, is that mark that ascendancy, suggesting that he was one not a mandate for centrism but rather a reaction need to be taken every few years — like injections, treatment available during the height of the AIDS cultures that dismiss the importance of sexual pro- to usher in a new age: a politician for our times, against the populist right. There is no doubt that Implanon and IUDs — has meant more people have epidemic when the government didn’t care about tection threaten the relatively low rates of STI trans- who claims to be from that faraway land beyond circumstance favoured Macron, but perhaps it did been able to use hormonal contraceptives without people with AIDS”. Importantly, HIV transmission is mission at the moment. If condoms don’t make a left and right. so for a reason. worry, or the need to supplement with condoms. still a real possibility. When asked why he always come back, syphilis will. This, at least, is the myth that Macron has been In his victory speech, Macron did not shy away Harry*, for example, says that his condom use uses condoms, Sam* who also identifies as gay tells cultivating since the start of his campaign. He is seen from the reality of his task. He is the leader of changed quickly when his girlfriend began to use me, “because AIDs looks pretty bad”. *NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED. as the harbinger of a new political class: independ- a newly created party, with no friends in the as- the contraceptive implant rather than the pill. “I It seems, though, that a person’s culture is among ART BY RISAKO KATSUMATA. ent, young at just 39, intellectual, and pragmatic. sembly yet. His ability to act with conviction will guess I really wouldn’t know first hand, but I know the most important factors determining whether Macron has pitched himself as a different kind of rely on the results of the June legislative election. centrist, and the media has agreed: empathetic to The pivotal moment in his victory speech was his social issues with a faith in a free, globalised mar- reaction to the crowd’s booing of Le Pen and her ket. His task now is of equally mythic proportions: to supporters. Macron seized the opportunity to re- Earth day starts with us prove that this myth can become a reality. cast his election as a bridge-building moment. He Centrism has been shaped by stability-seeking calmed the crowds: “No, don’t boo. They expressed JENNIFER HORTON / Government inaction means the ball is back in our court moderates around the globe, who are now placing anger today. Dismay. And sometimes conviction. I a burden of hope and conviction on the shoulders of respect them.” “Hey Environment. It’s not you, it’s us.” as the world’s first green party. Numerous strikes by tralia undertaking carbon reduction policies with this lone Frenchman. Who can blame them? While This is what sets Macron apart. He acknowledges The message on the home page of the Sydney En- building unions in the name of the environment, so- adverse economic affects, unless similar actions Macron’s task is a difficult one, the outcome of his that the right must be heard, that its rising popu- vironmental Institute is meant to sound like a cliché called ‘Green bans’, brought the word ‘green’ into were taken by the vast majority of other green- Presidency, if successful, might just suggest that cen- larity with the working classes stems from aliena- break up text. Are things really this bad, USyd? Are the social lexicon. house gas producing countries. trism is the right vehicle for the long road ahead. tion, not necessarily ignorance or fear. To bridge we in the middle of a messy break up with the envi- By the 1980s, the environmental movement in The responsibility to act seems to have returned to And it is a long road, riddled with quagmires and the divide, it is up to centrist leaders like Macron ronment, after all the time and effort that’s been put Australia had reached a peak. High air pollution where it began — with individuals and communities. bandits who threaten at every turn. It is too early to to exercise a politics of genuine dialogue: “I will do in? As in any break up, you ask yourself the question levels and major land erosion fuelled activism in USyd students have numerous avenues to engage assert that Macron’s win marks a shift in the global everything … to make sure there is no reason at all — am I going to regret the decision I’ve made? the name of a clean future. The counterculture that with climate research: the Science Faculty offers a political narrative. What it instead proves is that a to vote for extremes”. This was a telling moment A few weeks ago, on April 22nd, I walked into a had nurtured the movement was diminishing, but major in Environmental Studies, the Department of single political trend cannot accurately be drawn for what could possibly come out of leader-driven meeting to find a friend holding a plant. “It’s Earth public support of conservation became more and Government and International Relations provide sev- across international elections. Instead, we must dialogue from the sensible centre. Macron’s place Day”, he informed me. I’ve written three papers on en- more popular, as initiatives like mass tree-planting eral units in environmental politics, and multiple uni- look to divisions. What’s emerging across the globe as an independent at the head of En Marche! gives vironmentalism this semester but Earth Day, a world- and Clean Up Australia Day took hold. In 1983, the versity clubs promote environmental issues alongside right now is a tension between two forces: the pop- him a unique opportunity to recast the practice wide event created to promote environmental protec- Hawke government blocked the contentious plan the Students’ Representative Council Environmental ulist right and the ‘sensible centre’. The battle be- of politics; to forge bridges, rather than divisions, tion, almost managed to slip past me unnoticed. to dam the Franklin River in Tasmania in a display Collective. Last year, USyd hosted the third annual tween Marine Le Pen and Macron was the tension from his own policy platform. Such an advantage is Rachel Carson’s 1962 book, Silent Spring, is typ- that showed the power of green campaigning. En- National Environment Meeting, an event for activists between these two forces made incarnate. what makes the task more achievable for him than ically credited as precipitating the scientific envi- vironmentally friendly messages became stylish in across Australia to gather and discuss key issues of Where is the left? It seems that it’s no longer it was for Turnbull at home in Australia, where a ronmental movement. When Earth Day launched in pop culture, embraced by bands like Midnight Oil the environmental movement. This year, the March holding up as a feasible alternative. Oddly, its capable centrist has been bound by established the United States on 22 April 1970, the movement and U2. for Science on Earth Day saw 10,000 people demon- working class base has shifted to the right, citing party identities. had most certainly reached the mainstream — 20 In 1990, Australia celebrated its first Earth Day, strate across Australia. nationalism and a desire to be heard. While the last Perhaps Macron realises that his leadership will million people flooded the grounds of two thousand along with 140 other countries and 200 million The average university student is more con- 12 months have seen the emergence of dark isola- Art: Jocelin Chan only succeed if he remains on the ground. Not American universities to rally for reform. Republi- people. Bob Hawke declared the 1990s Australia’s cerned with finishing late assignments. Unfortu- tionism in Trump and Brexit, they also produced above the stars, but with the people on the dusty cans and Democrats united to pass legislation creat- ‘Decade of Landcare’, and the steady restoration of nately, the penalties for late action on the environ- victories for European Union integration, with Al- road. For that is the advantage of centrism, and for ing the Environmental Protection Agency. the ozone layer after the ban on CFCs brought new ment are far worse. Our governments are shirking exander van Der Bellen in Austria and liberal Mark Macron has won out, marking a supposed victory once, even if by accident, centrism has a mandate. Two years later, the movement arrived in Aus- optimism about the power of international envi- responsibility and whether we choose to do some- Rutte in the Netherlands. Too often we forget that for centrism. Except it’s not quite a victory: a large Macron must engage the two forces in dialogue. tralia with anti-litter campaigns and protests against ronmental cooperation. thing about it is up to us. both forces are at play in an equal contest. It just part of Macron’s win came down to the failures Easier said than done, but for just a few seconds, damming projects. Included in the protests was the Keating’s leadership slowed that momentum. As so happens that the populist right has held sway in of others who sought the Presidency from estab- why not cue the Ode to Joy? United Tasmania Group, which is now recognised treasurer, Keating had criticised the idea of Aus-

8 9 STUDIO STUDIO Review: The Red Pill and chill RoboPoC: sugar, spice and everything rice BIANCA FARMAKIS / Can the fractured debate around the controversial film be redeemed? ERIC GONZALES / RoboPoC captures all the ethnic pride I wish my younger self had possessed

Unsurprisingly, it’s intimidating to larised member of the plebeian polit- series of (mostly white) men express- referred to as a “creature”, and laugh- For too long, much of my humour punches produced genuinely hilarious cal comedy. An imagined prologue to ad, without contributing an original stand before a room full of Men’s ical spectrum alike chastising one an- ing their feelings, ranging from the ter filled the room at the mere sugges- has revolved around self-deprecation: moments: Dr. Phil (played by Sophia ‘Snakes on a Plane’ conveyed mostly punchline. However, I could count Rights Activists (MRAs) and proclaim other with chants and choreographed rational to irrational. The most enter- tion of men needing feminism. These caricaturing my ethnic eccentricities Chung in a crudely applied bald cap) through interpretive dance stole a RoboPoC’s shortcomings on one hand. you’re a feminist. On Tuesday, May brawls. Through the looking glass of taining and informative aspect of the kind of immature attitudes, coupled and transforming my foreignness into interviewing archetypal Australian few chuckles because of its sheer ri- Beyond amusing performances, 11, in Carslaw Lecture Theatre 175, I an iPhone, my political voyeuristic film was the audience’s response. with the aggressive, forever-scream- something more palatable. It’s taken me xenophobes brought on frenzied laugh- diculousness. And Mandy Chen’s ver- RoboPoC refreshingly shows people found myself in this position. heart beat ferociously. In my subjective opinion, it is an ing protestors, stifled any chance for longer to realise that my white friends ter; Natali Caro was Pauline Hanson satility was equally impressive, from of colour transcending the stereotyp- I attended the screening of con- Despite agreeing that it may be objective fact that women have been either side to form constructive, effec- never did this — never pre-emptively incarnate, mimicking her anachronistic subtle scowls as a glowering pupil to ical identities prescribed to them and troversial documentary The Red Pill problematic to screen the film and traditionally disadvantaged and de- tive arguments on the topic. ridiculed themselves, even comically, inflections in a very swampy and very a defeated, wailing (or climaxing, I turning back the critical lens to wider intending to analyse the film and at- incite the wrong kind of reaction, it graded across all paradigms through- These attitudes aside, as Jaye an- because they’d never had to experience ethnic rendition of Rob Cantor’s ode to wasn’t sure which) Godzilla. society. In retrospect, my self-depre- tempt to understand a different per- struck me as odd to hear protesters la- out history, and feminism exists to nounces she’s learned to “no longer the same kind of otherness. ‘actual cannibal’ Shia LaBeouf; and Eli- I won’t deny that the crinkles of cating humour — about my school spective from my own. In the end, bel conveners as “fascists” and “racists” address these inequalities. Similarly call myself a feminist,” and the cred- By interrogating and inverting ra- jah Abraham shone in the second act as opening night were still visible — lunches, my skin colour, my migrant the debate, discussion and discourse while attempting to circumvent their to those who speak in the film, how- its rolled, despite the fact the film en- cial stereotypes, the diverse RoboPoC a werewolf howling faux pas under a there was a flubbed line here and parents hell-bent on my success — that emerged from the three-hour access to free action. It also struck me ever, select members of the audience lightened me on very little, the dis- cast, led by directors Ann Ding and full moon and a radicalised adolescent there, and the opening dance num- reflected how different I knew I was medicinal ordeal of swallowing The as repulsive that a “feminism is can- appeared unaware of the basic defi- cussion that ensued taught me one Shon Ho, have delivered a revue that who discovers that rice is the fabled ber was out of sync in places. A few from everyone else. Maybe back then, Red Pill was more interesting than cer” shirt could see the light of day. nition of feminism: to achieve the so- interesting lesson. embodies the boldness, insight and theory of everything. skits admittedly fizzled, the humour it was internalised shame. the film itself. Twenty minutes into ‘Red Pill and cial, political and economic equality Shaking, and nervous, I stood be- self-awareness my younger self lacked. But RoboPoC also undeniably ex- of some superficially relying on the But now RoboPoC reminds me of From first observation, there seems Chill’, it was clear that it was only the of the sexes. fore a room of MRAs and argued that Superb acting, astute comedic celled in its apolitical goofiness, best audience’s knowledge of viral mis- where my allegiances ultimately lie: to be a real issue with accessing ‘free marketing and propaganda surround- When the f-word (feminist, that is) I could rationalise the confusing jour- timing, and the guts to throw some encapsulated in its unabashed physi- steps, like Kendall Jenner’s tacky Pepsi “give me rice or give me death”. speech’ rights at The University of ing this film that has made it worth was mentioned, hooting and hissing ney the narrator followed, yet found Sydney if you piss off the Socialist Al- seeing. I’m no Roger Ebert, but the permeated across the room. I dried the film’s exploration of gender equal- ternative. As with any film premiere, film’s director, Cassie Jaye, is certainly out like the Sahara Desert hearing the ity concepts were not enough to rule 2017’s Sydney Uni Revue betrays a great cast prior to the screening, there was no Tarantino either. The film depicts a utterance of “daddy” from the mouths feminism invalid. Apart from one au- electrifying entertainment to satisfy poorly constructed interplay between of several young men when Donald dible gasp after I called myself a femi- MADDY GANDHI and ALEX BATEMAN / A strong showing of talent suffered from otherwise tame direction the crowds with MRAs, ‘social justice the confused, ‘ex-feminist’ filmmaker Trump appeared on the screen — not nist, the crowd stared back; not pierc- warriors’ (SJWs) and every other po- battling her internal demons and a to mention when Barack Obama was ingly, nor scathingly, but interested. It’s fair to say that last night at the sistent and occasionally relied on ge- Both felt out of place and disjointed through charisma and character work. There was a pause, and as I found the Seymour Centre trumped our regu- neric comedic clichés. from the production’s overall rhythm. The cast’s camaraderie translated well right words to articulate the benefits of lar Milo (and whisky) night-in. We Like a solid Saturday night, the The tone of ‘millennial angst’ set by the into their performance and revitalised feminism and how it addresses many shared laughs and enjoyed the banter, pre-gaming were awkward, the end promotional material did little to unite well-known sketches from last year’s of the men’s rights issues brought up but were overall more impressed by was messy, but boy was the middle the sketches in the way last year’s re- revue seasons. A huge shoutout is de- by the film, the silence of the crowd the talent onstage than the sketches tight. The strength of the show lay in vue used the theme of ‘primary school’ served to Darby Judd for elevating was as jarring as it was receptive. themselves in this year’s Sydney Uni its performances with most bite, such to underscore the show. The discord- every sketch he featured in and regen- It brought me back to this point on Revue. The show, which re-works the as one delivered by Alex Gillezeau as ant nature of the opening and closing erating them for a fresh audience. understanding the basic principles of cream of the crop from 2016’s Identity a raving Priest and in a spicy sidewalk numbers, however, is in no way due to feminism: to achieve equality between and Faculty revue seasons, showcased salsa between Lauren Gale and Shan- MVP Sasha Meaney who spearheads To read the full version of this the sexes. While this film is not well- a plethora of talent but felt unrealised. non Sweeney. However, both the open- both numbers and many-a-sketch with made, it opened, at least to its audi- Despite being propelled by the cast’s ing number — a musical ode to the vigour and captivating stage presence. revue review, head to the ence at USyd, what seems a necessary energy and offering fresh takes on last alt-right — and the closing song in cel- At particular points, each member of culture section of our website. dialogue to have. A pressing need for year’s sketches, the quality was incon- ebration of robot sex, missed the mark. the cast was able to grip the audience gender discourse to stray away from descending into a battle of the sexes. If you’re willing to dry swallow a Dicks in space red pill and open your mind to a per- Image: ANG COLLINS / Sexual difference theory in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 The Red spective that questions your own, your Pill Movie adversaries and opponents may do the same for you. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 has been rather scattered, infinitely fertile. film’s cinematic elements: from the received vaguely positively by audiences GotG2 endows Star-Lord (Pratt) soundtrack (Looking Glass’s nau- and sort of middlingly by critics. Chris with a father. He is a god named Ego tical love song Brandi plays a Eurovision: a cause for unity Pratt, everyone’s fave dopey meat pup- (played by a somehow-resurrected Kurt key role) to minuscule narra- pet, is back alongside his crew of alien Russell) and boy does he have plans tive details (Ego implanted MAXIM ADAMS / The patriotism and politics of Eurovision chums. The soundtrack’s still great and for the universe. Ego’s a virile, cool-guy a cancerous tumour in the film still guides us through pretty dad whose human form is a facade he Star-Lord’s mother’s I’ll be honest: I’ve never been the Clearly, Eurovision has evolved cal voting according to political blocs, I’ve heard much about over-the-top enjoyable antics and Groot-isms. inhabits because his actual body is a brain, surely the worst biggest Eurovision fan (it would steal into more than a simple competition: or the lasting power of the Eurovision sets and highly-strung emotions — in- But something happened to me weird celestial brain. He also literally kind of mimetic crea- the SBS slot usually reserved for it has history and subcultures all of its performance as a platform for politi- deed, Julia Zemiro likened the atmos- partway through my viewing of GotG2 rides around in a sperm spaceship. tion there is). There’s Mythbusters). But as a young Ukrain- own. Gauja went on to talk about its cal protests, such as the threatened phere to that of a “news room” before — my heart started fluttering, I could Ego is the epitome of the Freudian also an interesting ian, with all eyes currently fixed on hugely intricate set of rules, pushed boycott of the competition in 2009 by a deadline — and yet very little about no longer concentrate on the gags, or male ego, which historically is con- stepfather figure in Kyiv, I’ve been inevitably drawn into at every opportunity by countries the Dutch due to Russia’s homophobic the apparent encroach of soulless me- the fact that I’m strangely attracted to ceived of as creating meaning and the mix — Yondu the excitement. This week, the Uni- who’ve invested millions of dollars policies. This is especially relevant for dia. More often than not, fears about Bradley Cooper in raccoon form. form from matter, from feminised po- whose name we versity’s Eurovision Forum heard from into their entries. Perhaps it’s strange Ukraine’s victory last year and result- the destructive effects of technology Basically, I think GotG2 provides a tential. No wonder semen and semi- could also ana- Art: former host Julia Zemiro and Associate that the politics of a song and dance ant hosting. For citizens, it’s a defiant on art fail to materialise, and creative theory of sexual difference and outlines otics have the same etymological root lyse. ‘Yonic’ sym- Matthew Professor Anika Gauja, as they dis- contest could carry such weight, but exclamation of Ukraine’s success in people find new ways to subvert forms a cosmology of meaning itself. I think. — the creation of meaning, of sound bols are those Fisher cussed the song contest’s meaning the strength of a country’s entry in the face of Russian hostility, as well as and connect genuinely with people. Maybe it’s because I’ve been read- ideas out of scattered phenomena, that represent to both themselves and the interna- many ways reflects the strength of a symbolic move towards greater in- And that’s the key: passion and crea- ing a bit of Zizek lately (sue me!), mimics the phallic act of creating life. the vulva or va- tional community. its culture. From my experience in dependence and legitimacy in the eyes tivity are difficult, if not impossible, to but suddenly the Hollywood superhe- Ego’s desire mimics the desire of gina, suggesting The competition emerged at an in- Australia’s Ukrainian community, of the international community. The fully stifle. ro-space genre seemed like the perfect the Freudian ego, which is to create that the ultimate This teresting time in European history: as the symbols and rhythms of the folk controversies have also continued, It seems to me that Eurovision suc- vehicle for an analysis of the philos- endless meaning — he wants to “sow father is a ‘femi- is a Gauja explained, it was conceived as songs link the diaspora to their ances- with Russian artist Yulia Samoilova ceeds when, as Zemiro put it, artists ophy of sexual difference, an analysis his seeds” across the universe by im- nised’ one. sweep- a way of bringing a splintered con- tors, connecting us with a long verbal being banned from entering Ukraine “sing a song that they like”; when that serves as a companion theory to pregnating as many female bodies as In the Guardi- ing theory, tinent together after the ravages of tradition. Indeed, Ruslana’s victory due to apparent violation of travel it’s music competition first, political second wave feminism, using Lacan- possible, creating an army of demi- ans’ destruction of of course, World War Two. It’s unlikely that the in 2004 is still fresh in the Ukrainian laws in 2016. battleground second. Certainly, it’s a ian psychoanalysis as a base for dis- gods. Yuck. Ego/the male ego, the but one that founders knew what a glittery, mul- psyche. As the Eurovision producer The speakers expressed their fears line that isn’t always easy to define. cussion (sue me again, why don’t ya!). The film really succeeds in pulling historic phallic conception convinced me the ticoloured phenomenon Eurovision mentioned in 2016, “it’s a battle- that people can lose sight of what But while the forces of Twitter and Here’s the breakdown. Also, spoil- out the philosophical threads of this of meaning is also condemned. movie was a worth- would become, but the communal field where you can allow yourself to matters: that political forces distract global politics may be at play, the au- ers. I hate myself for saying that — I narrative, ultimately condemning Ego The film doesn’t really answer what a while sequel to the joy of the first. If spirit they envisioned doesn’t seem be a patriot”. us from the artists’ efforts and pas- ditorium packed with fans enjoying feel like a Redditor. as a self-obsessed super villain who feminist conception of meaning looks you don’t watch it for the psychoanal- to have waned. Speaking to a packed However, with national pride at sion, and that commercialisation and in-jokes and the genuine pride of each The universe has always been con- scatters his toxic masculinity mimeti- like, but what is apparent at the end ysis, you should watch it for Sylvester theatre, the audience warmly laughed stake in Eurovision, it’s easy to see omnipresent social media hinder hon- country’s communities show that the sidered a maternal thing. The word cally throughout the universe — the of the film is that a force that is queer Stallone’s wooden acting chops and and applauded in-jokes about span- how it becomes infused with power esty and boldness when performing. enthusiasm hasn’t left. As it did fifty “matter” comes from the Latin “mater” worst kind of manspreading. and multiple — i.e. the Guardians of some truly terrible CGI sequences to- gly outfits, off-key choruses, and Eng- plays and politics. Both Gauja and As a Eurovision outsider, it’s difficult years ago, Eurovision still unites Eu- (mother, mum). Matter — everything, The metaphor of the toxic male form the Galaxy — protects the universe ward the end of the film. As for me, I’ll land’s general incompetence. Zemiro touched on the spread of tacti- to comment, but it does strike me that rope. And, apparently, Australia. the universe — has no form, but is manifests itself beautifully across the damn nicely. be on Reddit.

10 11 GALLERY let me google the that for you POETRY BY KURT DILWEG living ART BY GRACE FRANKI laboratory

Words / Natassia Chrysanthos Art / Robin eames

The idea of a “living laboratory” conjures images of rived from students and staff — making us, in many what’s happening is dubious. Common justifications lab rats and test tubes; an ethically compromised senses, the lab rats — was not mentioned. like “safety and security” and “enhancing the stu- zoo, perhaps, or a dystopian Dexter-esque scientific Callahan’s statement reflects the way Austral- dent experience” reflect the genuine goals behind experiment. But a university campus? ian universities are increasingly using surveillance many programs. But on the other hand, they operate Yet this was precisely the term used by Ian Calla- technologies like sensors, wi-fi, CCTV, face-matching as rhetorical cover to mask the real danger of col- han, the Chief Operating Officer of Curtin University, platforms and learning analytics to become “smart lecting, for example, incredibly sensitive biometric to describe his campus’ transition to new technol- campuses”. As facilities increasingly move online, data that can be used to track you. ogy earlier this month. “We are effectively creating technology rapidly evolves, and the availability of Also embedded within these technologies are a living laboratory that is an open invitation to our data escalates, personal information and markers of more insidious implications for how power is exer- own researchers and scientists from other universi- student behaviour are all ripe for the taking. cised. Humans moderate their behaviour and con- ties to use our campus to discover and innovate with Privacy is the obvious concern, and the extent form to expectations when they know they’re being 12 data-driven research,” he said. That this data is de- to which students have meaningfully consented to watched, and the university campus is no exception. LONGER READ LONGER READ

Callahan’s remarks were made in the context of When Honi contacted the University of Melbourne that at the moment, but obviously the technology is reflects who was in the environment, what Curtin University’s use of ‘Internet of Things’ (IoT) for comment on the matter, Director of Technology there to be used in the future.” was going on, and all the interactions, technology: a suite of new technologies will be in- Management Daniel Buttigieg said Belcher’s quotes Curtin University is looking to the “significant Surveillance and data collection on campus extends the insights are diminished… If you stalled on the campus so data can be gathered and role” facial recognition can play for campus safety beyond the physical realm: Universities around the have 10,000 students and only 500 combined from multiple facilities. Video analytics, The University and convenience, citing, for instance, its potential to world are also adopting increasingly sophisticated opt in, you don’t get a clear picture sensory tracking and live face matching, for exam- displace keys in the foreseeable future. analytics within the teaching and learning space, ac- of what’s going on.” ple, will allow Curtin to generate information about of Melbourne was Swinburne University integrates analytics pro- counting for another way in which your data and “the lifecycle of the student, the day to day reality grams with its CCTV cameras, allowing the tech- online behaviour is monitored. of a staff member, the activity pattern of a lecture considering a plan to nology to automatically detect unusual behaviour ELearning gathers information that includes your The biggest risk of digitising anything theatre,” and so on, according to a statement. and recognise number plates, and might add fa- access to online materials and its correlation with is potential disclosure, according to Both Deakin University and the University of Mel- manipulate students’ cial-matching and heat maps to its capabilities. In your marks, how many minutes are spent listening web security expert Troy Hunt. bourne are similarly using their wi-fi networks to de- an iTnews report, Swinburne’s IT security specialist to lectures, and results from previous subjects, which “You start to have a huge amount of velop maps of students’ locations in real-time. In Au- movements based on Chris Goetze said: “There are persons of interest are made available to teaching staff accordingly. deeply sensitive personal information gust 2016, Melbourne’s Head of Services Paul Duldig who we would like to know if they’re on site or not. Unit co-ordinators can generate reports on students’ that describes people’s behaviours, and told the ABC: “We’re not breaching [students’] pri- their location by That’s where facial recognition would be handy.” collective age, fee status, languages spoken at home, possibly genetic biometric data,” Hunt vacy because we don’t know who they are ... At this At present, Swinburne’s camera-matching Snap whether they’re first in their family, and so on. told Honi. “What would it mean to stage we’re not [tracking individuals] so we don’t tampering with their Surveillance platform still allows people to be While the University maintains that all of this lose all of that, or to have all of think it would be required to notify people.” tracked in real-time. “If you want to follow ‘person information is useful for teaching purposes, some that made public?” But these capabilities immediately evoke the prob- wi-fi access in certain of interest A’ across the campus, this tool comes members of staff remain unconvinced. “[Universities] are lem of ‘function creep’: the potential to gradually ex- into its own then because you find your suspect on subjected to hacks non- tend the use of a technology beyond the purpose for areas of campus the camera, and it shows you nearby cameras they We, the instructor, stop all day, every day,” which it was initially intended. In response to the might walk towards,” Goetze said. Hunt said. “Anything that is University of Melbourne’s plans, Dr Adam Henschke Trying to capture and bust crime after the fact is all of a sudden find publically accessible is, par- from ANU’s National Security College said: “Once had been taken out of context in the report. “The just one use of the University’s blanket surveillance ticularly universities where you start getting this information you can go, ‘oh, University is not actively looking into that,” Butt- machinery. “The other way that digital technology ourselves put in a you’ve got a whole bunch of this information is quite useful for a bunch of other igieg said. “But obviously the abilities are there if gets used in the landscape is to actually sort differ- people that are quite smart things, let’s use it for these further purposes’. Then somebody wanted to go and do that.” ent population groups into their appropriate spaces position of too much and have easy access.” you get into even deeper concerns about informed on a campus. There are more and more spaces “The most important ques- consent and misuse of personal information.” on campus that are kind of ‘behind locked doors’, potential power tion is how often [breaches and Fast-forward seven months: Australian tech web- Wi-fi and sensory tracking are just some of the [which means] it’s getting increasingly difficult for hacks] are successful. If you just site iTnews.com.au reported that the University of ways universities monitor students’ movements in us to access the workplace,” said Iveson. do a Google search, you’ll see stuff Melbourne was considering a plan to manipulate stu- physical space. Increasingly sophisticated CCTV “The question also becomes: who’s writing the “I don’t believe it’s the role of the instructor to all over the place. It’s certainly hap- dents’ movements based on their location by tamper- networks around campus also ensure you are con- code that determines who has access and who does access blackboard and get a hold of all this. That’s pened in Australia in the past as well. ing with their wi-fi access in certain areas of campus. stantly being watched. not? And how open is that process to accountability between you and the faculty,” Maguire said. Certainly these attempts are hap- At the Cloud and DC Edge Summit in March “There are cameras everywhere,” says Kurt Ive- towards the University community or those who are Students already face pressure to cater to their tu- pening all the time. There’s a certain Art: Justine Landis-Hanley 2017, of which there is no public record, Melbourne son, an associate professor of urban geography at affected by it?” tors and professors, and with access to this data, amount of incidents we hear about, and University’s data centre and facility services man- the University of Sydney. “There are cameras on the “we, the instructor, all of a sudden find ourselves put a lot we don’t. Frankly, there’s a lot that ager Will Belcher said: “Deans of some faculties are top of [buildings], there are cameras in the lifts go- Curtin University in a position of too much potential power in rela- the Universities themselves would never even learn “Your generation has more or less accepted this,” not happy that their libraries are being filled with ing down to car parks, into buildings, and the extent tionship to the students. This is an additional power about, or never even realise.” Maguire said. “My generation was sort of like, ‘we’re all sorts of students who aren’t necessarily in their of data that is just being captured as part of [this] is looking to the I [now] have over you. Why should I know about USyd itself is no stranger to security debacles. In not used to this,’ and when we see it cropping up we faculty… They want to try and use the data from the surveillance network is really ballooning out”. the fact you’ve failed other classes, for example?” February 2015, thousands of students were informed go, ‘this is bad’. But your generation has been brought wireless access points and controllers — we track An indication of the network’s extent is the bur- ‘significant role’ facial “As much as we try to keep our marking unbiased, by the Dean of the Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences up in a situation in which this has always happened. [wi-fi usage] against each student’s login name — to geoning amount of space required to store all of its there is no question that knowing how students ac- that their personal information may have been ac- [You have] also been brought up under terrorism, so determine what faculty they’re in.” footage. While it did not divulge information in de- recognition can play cess optional resources and the time they spend cessed by an unknown party and in the hands of you’re used to [the instruments of surveillance] that The students who belong to the faculty could tail, the University of Sydney confirmed that it now studying would subconsciously affect marking,” an- hackers. A 16-year-old hacker, who goes by the alias have become very ramped up in Western society.” get superior wi-fi coverage, “so as to gently dis- contracts out its data storage facilities to a third party other member of teaching staff told Honi. “I can’t Abdilo, claimed responsibility for the information se- In a context where students give their data to suade the [other] students and steer them back to supplier off campus. At the University of Melbourne, Video surveillance has also historically operated see how I could know these details about a student’s curity breach, in which the data of 5,000 students an array of corporations every day in exchange for their own libraries.” iTnews reported that there were plans to convert as as a tool of control, which relates to the age-old course engagement and honestly assign them an was left insecure. At the time, Abdilo told Honi he had convenience, this trajectory on University campuses Placing the ethics of unpleasant design and the many as 150 communications rooms into micro data warning that people’s behaviour fundamentally objective mark — it seems not only unethical, but little trouble accessing the information, and rated the aligns with the status quo. sinister prospect of covertly controlling students’ storage centres, in order to accommodate the escalat- changes when they know they’re being watched. unrealistic to think otherwise.” university’s database security as a “0” out of 10. “The University is the norm, rather than the excep- movements aside, this contradicts the University’s ing collection of higher resolution CCTV. “The recording of lectures in and of itself makes you The University’s recently established Data Ana- tion,” Maguire said. Universities are no longer ‘ivory earlier claims that privacy concerns were moot be- Buttigieg told Honi: “The current resolution we very careful about what it is that you say and what lytics Research Group is investigating how this data The risk we have as towers’, separate from the rest of the community. cause wi-fi information was anonymised. More im- have is high definition which is quite good. It’s just it is that you don’t say,” Maguire said. “You’re very can be analysed for both research and operational “[They] are behaving just like any other corporation portantly, it demonstrates how ‘function creep’ is the expansion of CCTV and having more cameras in conscious that there’s a third element in the room. purposes. By the end of this year, it aims to have soon as we digitise that exists. Education is the fourth largest business in already a problem. more areas [requires the extra space].” “Now you’re being recorded visually. Why should started cultivating an “educational data bank,” ac- this economy, writ and large. That’s the fact.” Which begs the question: why is further expan- the lecture theatre be monitored? It’s to keep an eye cording to Co-chair Dr Kathryn Bartimote-Aufflick. anything is the risk of And so students’ frequent response is one of re- sion of video surveillance on campus on me as an instructor, to keep an eye on the business This data bank will start connecting different data luctant compromise: “I’ve come to expect it as a rea- a necessity? I’m doing, and to keep an eye on you as the client.” sets of student information that people have not had disclosure. What would sonable exchange. While I’m not always comfortable Honi asked a University of Sydney The implications of surveillance for protest and access to before. with the level of surveillance, I reluctantly accept it as spokesperson to provide evidence civil resistance in this context are particularly stark. The University insists that it will be work- it mean to have all of a necessary evil for my education,” said UTS student or statistics that point to the use- “When the police are on campus they always turn up ing closely with its privacy commissioner to ad- Jack Bresnahan. fulness of CCTV as a preventative with cameras and go right up to you and film every- dress concerns that will inevitably arise; however, that made public? But these measures still strike us as eerie and per- security measure. In response, they body that’s there,” Maguire said. “You know you’re be- questions of retention and students’ meaningful haps unsettlingly familiar. It’s not by coincidence said: “University CCTV footage has ing filmed, and that automatically reduces the amount consent remain poignant. that omnipresent and omniscient surveillance is been used to identify offenders of people that are willing to take part in protest.” “Often there’s a seven year record keeping number In March last year, the University again contacted linked with the horror of dystopian fiction; 1984 is on campus … [and return] stolen According to Iveson: “The classic example of that goes with ethics approval,” Bartimote-Aufflick select students after a laptop containing unencrypted imprinted in society’s collective imagination as a no- property ... There is also a qualitative the function creep is when protesters are walking told Honi. “But in terms of longitudinal analyses and confidential personal information from the Universi- torious warning sign for a reason. The capacity of benefit of having CCTV in that it increases through the city, [surveillance] cameras are on them a historical database that could be potentially use- ty’s Disability Assist Database was “lost in transit.” A technology to render subjects docile and obedient is the feeling of safety and security, however it is and police have the right to request the City of Syd- ful, I think it would be worth keeping them longer.” University ICT staff member left the laptop on a bus, a power that is thoroughly theorised. not a stand-alone tool and therefore cannot be ney hand over their [CCTV] footage because ‘we’re Whether students have meaningfully consented potentially compromising the disability diagnosis, A Foucauldian analysis holds that power in mod- measured as such.” worried about some incident’. Suddenly they’ve got to the use and storage of their data for a prolonged names and contact addresses of nearly 7,000 current ern society is found in disciplinary techniques, such “[But] how is burglary prevented?” asks Diarmuid a record of everybody’s attendance.” amount of time is up in the air. While all students and former students. as surveillance, which are applied to individuals at Maguire, a senior lecturer in the USyd Department of “When marches are happening through campus, scroll down and click ‘agree’ to on terms and con- As an increasing amount of data is aggregated and a local level. Thus to see how power operates we Government and International Relations. “Has bur- I don’t know how those cameras are working. I ditions about their enrolment, presumably few read stored, what risk are we willing to take with sensitive should not necessarily cast our eyes to regulated cen- glary stopped because of all of this? In terms of per- wouldn’t have a clue whether there are data sharing the fine print and consider its implications. Moreso, personal and biometric information? tral power, nor even towards power’s intent. Rather, sonal safety, I don’t see how that is prevented at all.” arrangements with the police that extend to ‘we’re many would expect their information’s relevance to techniques of control implemented in local and insti- Meanwhile, higher resolution technology offers trying to identify a ratbag activist that we want to lapse with their enrolment. tutional forms are paramount. an enhanced opportunity to use CCTV footage for stop.’ So that’s the stuff you just worry about.” “[With] some of this data, I don’t think explicit Despite the swathe of security and privacy concerns The increasing propensity of universities to mon- other purposes, such as facial tracking. “I have “It’s sort of next level when you read all the par- consent is always required,” Bartimote-Aufflick said. that come along with surveillance and collection of itor their students and staff’s every move, and the heard of other universities doing it for a number anoid surveillance studies about [how], when you One way of mitigating concerns with consent data, the reaction of many students is generally in- normalisation of this activity, bolsters their ability to of different purposes,” Buttigieg said. “Some of apply CCTV, you can integrate it with facial recogni- is to make these programs strictly opt-in, however, different. “It’ll be interesting to see if there is broad manipulate behaviour. Considering the evidence of them use it to count the number of people going tion and literally red flag individuals and be tracking this looks unlikely to be the case. “I think we would scale concern,” Bartimote-Aufflick said of the Uni- function creep that already exists, the living labora- in and out of a library for example, so they can their movements all over campus. It’s not inconceiv- set this up as an opt-out basis,” Bartimote-Aufflick versity’s Data Analytics research. “In some ways I tory in which we are test-subjects could be more sin- track usage patterns. We aren’t actively doing able with the tech that that could happen.” said. “As soon as you take away broad scale data that suspect there might not be.” ister than it’s made out to be. HS

14 15 SUPRA is responsible for the content of these pages. SUPRA SUPRA Refugee Art Project Students head to Canberra to protest fee hikes

ALUMNI AND CURRENT POST- Grad USYD students initiate and volunteer in refugee outreach project EILA VINWYNN - SUPRA SAAFDER AHMED - PHD Islamic Studies, interviewed by Eila Vinwnn

Refugee Art Project is a not-for-profit community art organisation that holds art workshops for asylum seekers and refugees, both within the Villawood detention centre and in our studio in north Parramatta. The aim of our org is to amplify the voices of refugees, through their art, and show their work to the wider community in order to educate the public and challenge the misconceptions that surround the refugee issue in this country.

I started the organisation with some friends, Bilquis Ghani and Omid Tofighian, in late 2010. I had just finished my PhD at Usyd in Islamic Studies and was looking for something active to do. After four and half years of pretty intense PhD-ing, I was itching to get out into the real world.

Students Protest outside Parliament House on Tuesday with ANU students and union members. Photo: Liam Kestevan

Student groups nation-wide registered their government wants to further impoverish young own protests outside Parliament. The unions all opposition to the government’s proposals to people and shift the cost of education onto working supported the students in their fight, citing the increase student fees and lower the HECS threshold people. When over 600 filthy rich companies pay attacks as classist, retrograde and repressive and at an action in Canberra on Budget day. no tax, and the government just reduced the parity vowing to stand behind students in the fight. company tax rate, they’re insulting our intelligence. Vanamali Hermans from the Australian National The $2.8 billion in cuts would see fees increase by We will fight this all the way”. University, said ‘the National Union of Students Despair - by Mohammed a maximum of $3600 for a four-year course with would be holding talks and protests at 730pm this students paying for 46% of the cost of their degree Lil Matchett, co-President of SUPRA notes “These evening in response the budget announcements. on average – up from 42 %. The cuts propose a fee hikes will lock more people out of accessible Under the proposed changes, permanent residents The project began very informally. I was visiting lowering fo the HECS threshold – down from $55, tertiary education. We defeated fee deregulation as well as all New Zealanders will have to pay their the Villawood detention centre for the first time but 874 to $42,000. in 2014, lets defeat this latest round of attacks on fees up front. wondered if I might be able to contribute something. students and win free education! We need to also Given that I've also studied art, I asked if anyone The action, on Tuesday May 9, at 130 pm was protest the fact New Zealanders and permanent The Sydney contingent of the widely organised wanted to draw with us. We brought lots of sketch initiated by Sydney University Postgraduate residents will now have to pay up-front!’ “National Day of Action” is organised for books and pencils, and soon established an art group Representative Association (SUPRA) Education Wednesday May 17th outside Fisher Library from within the centre. We sought to create a safe space Action Group, and endorsed by SUPRA, the Students joined in with various unions including 12noon. Join Us in the Fight for free education. where people felt free to express themselves to their National Union of Students and the University of the Maritime Union of Australia, the Construction own comfort. The work that flowed from that was very Sydney Student Representative Council (SRC). Forestry Mining Energy Union and the National powerful. Rachel Evans, SUPRA Education Officer said “The Tertiary Education Union who were holding their

Our art workshops in the community are held every Saturday afternoon, in our studio at 9 Albert St North Parramatta. Our organisation is run solely by Tent Embassy volunteers and supported by one-off donations, our own fundraising efforts, and donated art materials. Anyone of a refugee background is welcome to come message The Phone Call - by - name withheld along and join in if they are keen. Our exhibitions and publications are made in close collaboration with all of our participants. Basically it's about centring the “I can treaty with you, and you and you. But not diverse voices and perspectives of the asylum seekers with the Government. If I treaty with you, you and refugees who come to this country - activating art have responsibilites to care for this land”. These in the struggle for human dignity. were the words of elder Chris Tomlins from Alice Springs, statying at the Aboriginal Tent Emassy in SCA Post-Grad student, Susie Egg, volunteers at Canberra to make a stand against inclusion in the the programme each Saturday and helped with a Australian Constition. “Being incorporated into the recent Picnic Day to welcome members of the local Constitution would signal an end to us as Tribal community into the centre to see what is happening People” he said. “You are citizens” he said “because there. Many amazing food stalls were available as well you came on ships - you have Citizen-ship” he as other wares by people who have undergone the joked. But he was deadly serious about getting the gauntlet of detention. word out about the NO vote, and is in parley with ministers to have a moratorium of one year before Music, art and food showed the richness that others the vote, so that voters can be informed of what is bring. truly at stake. He also asked “If you fella’s can vote us IN to your constitution, can you vote yourselves therefugeeartproject.com OUT?”. I valid point, I thought. CHRIS SAYS - VOTE NO TO THE ABSORPTION OF ABORIGINALS INTO AN ILLEGAL CONSTITUTION. Photo: Liam Kestevan The Ocean is my Passport by Mona Moradveisi

16 17 The SRC is responsible for the content of this page. SRC REPORTS SRC CASEWORKERS

Note: This page is` given over to the office bearers of the Students’ Representative Council. The reports below are not President’s Report edited by the editors of Honi Soit. ISABELLA BROOK !! PROTEST !! 12PM !! 17 MAY !! will be locked out of the housing mar- The Environment: The Government cent in tax the government will be giv- Renting: FISHER LIBRARY !! ket. But there’s good news. You can is doing absolutely nothing to address ing multination corporations a $50bn Last week the government an- now use your superannuation to put climate change or prioritise renewable tax cut. nounced the 2017 federal budget and a deposit on a house!!! That’s right, energy. The 2017 Budget didn’t men- University: Higher Education will What if something it’s pretty grim for young people. In- instead of addressing unaffordable tion climate change once. now be less accessible with your uni- stead of investing in our future the housing prices and reforming negative Centrelink: People receiving versity fees set to increase and funding government has decided to wage a gearing the liberals are now letting Centrelink will now have to under go to universities being cut. You’ll also is broken? war on young people and students. you use your retirement savings to drug and alcohol testing. There will have to repay your HECS debt sooner. Some of the discourse around the buy a house. also be several changes to how stu- It’s clear from this budget that this budget can get a bit convoluted, so Penalty Rates: The Government is dents access Youth Allowance. Keep in government does not care about young here’s a quick low down on what the still committed to cutting the weekend mind that Youth Allowance rates still people. It’s time to get mad, it’s time to budget means for you. rates for some of Australia’s lowest don’t match current living costs and have your voice heard and it’s time to Housing Affordability: The gov- paid workers and young people, in- have not risen since the 90’s. fight for your future. Come join us out- ernment has refused to acknowledge stead of keeping money in the pockets Tax: Instead of targeting over 300 side Fisher Library at 12pm on the 17th You might to need to have repairs to the property when you move in. will need to pay to have it fixed. landlord disputes the repair. If a the fact that many young Australian’s of those who need it most. companies who didn’t pay a single of May to fight back against the budget. done to your home when you are Email these photos to the landlord, Generally speaking you will need landlord refuses to make an urgent renting as a student. Sometimes this so that you cannot be blamed for to use an appropriately qualified repair you can organise to have that is because we have broken something, them when you move out. Similarly person to make the repair. If you “fix done yourself provided you spend or because something breaks or goes just before you move out take photos it” yourself and you consequently less than $1,000. Of course you’ll Social Justice Officer’s Report wrong with the apartment or house. of things like the walls, the floors, damage the property in some way, need to keep receipts. Bear in mind KIM MURPHY If you are a tenant, there are rules in cupboards, oven, etc, and email you will be liable for that cost. that you might need to chase the NSW on what is your responsibility them to the landlord. This will also landlord for that money through the fix, and what your landlord is ensure that a fair Condition Report Some repairs are considered NSW Consumer and Administrative I have had a busy semester one as social in uni fees will be an important step in pill’, a pro-men’s rights documentary. the marches against Trump, which obligated to fix. will be given when you move out. urgent. This includes gas electricity Tribunal (NCAT). justice officer. There have been many the fight for student rights. So I built The protest was a success, we were included the women’s march in Syd- These photos will save you money by and water supply; hot water, cooking campaigns that I have been part of help- and attended the March 22nd action, able to make a left wing, anti-sexist ney. I also recently went to May Day to If your home is covered by a protecting your bond. and heating; anything that makes In some situations you can ask for ing to organise or helping to build. and have been building for and will be message heard to oppose the hideous stand up for the rights of the working lease agreement your landlord must the home unsafe (locks, fire hazards, a reduction in rent due to a repair. I have made sure the social justice speaking at the May 17th protest at reactionary cavalcade of men’s rights class and against the Liberal govern- provide you with a home that is You have a responsibility to keep etc); and any damage from a natural To discuss your specific situation office has been supporting NUS’ Make Usyd outside Fisher. activists and young Liberal bigots. ment’s attacks on workers, students reasonably clean, fit for you to live in, the home clean and in good repair. disaster (e.g. storm damage). talked to an SRC caseworker. Email Education Free Again campaign, and Another campaign I have been heav- Also in my capacity as social justice and the poor. and in reasonable repair. You should That means that if something breaks your situation to [email protected]. I’ve been doing a lot of work to pro- ily involved in is the new Fascist Free officer I have been building the Al- I encourage people to like the Make be given a Condition Report when you need to tell the landlord. For When asking your landlord to au or phone 9660 5222 to make an mote this campaign, as it is obviously Usyd campaign, which I personally Nakba rally to support Palestine, the Education Free Again and Fascist Free you start your lease showing what example, if the hot water system make repairs it is a good idea to do so appointment. the priority campaign for any activist helped to initiate. This has involved Pride march in June for LGBTI rights, Usyd Facebook pages if they haven’t damage already exists. It is a good breaks the landlord will need to have in writing. An email will timestamp in the SRC. The MEFA campaign cuts a counter-propaganda campaign, to I promoted and attended a pro-abor- already, and of course to like the Syd- idea to take photos of any damage it fixed. If you break a window you your requests. This is handy if the to the heart of the key issues for uni- counter the alt right posters and stick- tion rights rally against the far right, ney Uni Social Justice Department versity students, and the protest on ers on campus. I also organised and I promoted and attended the Palm Facebook page. Wed May 17 against Birmingham’s chaired a protest on May 11th to coun- Sunday rally for refugees, and earlier cuts to education funding and increase ter a far right film screening, ‘the red in the year I built for and attended Ask Abe Wom*n’s Officers’ Report IN A PICKLE? SRC caseworker HELP Q&A IMOGEN GRANT and KATIE THORBURN did not submit a report this week

The Ask Abe column allows you to ask whatever question you might have that affects you as a student, gaining the best advice General Secretary’s Report that a very worldly mutt* can give. DANIEL ERGAS and ISABELLA PYTKA did not submit a report this week

Dear Abe, Try to resolve your problems Criminal Charges I’m having problems with my informally first. Sometimes if some Disabilities & Carers’ Report housemates and I think my landlord things issues caused by specific is going to make us pay for a few people, you and your housemates can HANNAH MAKRAGELIDIS and NOA ZULMAN did not submit a report this week things that got broken. We’re all on come to an agreement of how things Motor Vehicle Accidents Fines the lease but it wasn’t my fault. What should be paid for. Remember that should I do? you are not required to pay for urgent repairs like hot water or anything Insurance Need Space that makes the house unsafe. You also Vice Presidents’ Report Debts shouldn’t have to pay for ‘reasonable JAMES GIBSON and IMAN FARRAR did not submit a report this week wear and tear’ to the property. Immigration Dear Need Space, However, things like walls, floors, ...and more cupboards, etc. are your responsibility In a rented share house, your to keep clean and in good repair. legal status depends on a number of possibilities. If you are named on If your disagreement can’t be If You Have a Legal Problem, the residential tenancy agreement worked out informally, or you need (your lease) along with one or more advice about how to handle your We Can Help for FREE! others, then you are a co-tenant. Your dispute, speak to your local Tenants rights are equal and several, so you Advice and Advocacy Service or an could be held liable for the actions of SRC Caseworker to find out what to your housemates. However, you are do. 法律諮詢 We have a solicitor who speaks 法律アドバイス Cantonese, Mandarin & Japanese also covered under the Residential Level 1, Wentworth Bldg, University of Sydney Tenancies Act, which means you have Abe

p: 02 9660 5222 | w: src.usyd.edu.au Liability limited by a scheme This service is provided to you by the approved under Professional Students’ Representative Council, basic occupancy rights and can access e: solicitor @ src.usyd.edu.au Standards Legislation. University of Sydney ACN 146 653 143 | MARN 1276171 affordable, independent dispute resolution.

19 RUMPUS ROOM REGULARS

REALLY LONG What to sing The Camperdown Public Chatterbox MANY WORDS when you have lost They framed me! of Franki’s and Shim’s A-frames — it seems to be at 8 at Manning shortly before the Board election Oliver Moore is writing their PhD on contemporary working swimmingly... results are announced. Much like the Engo Revue American queer political poetry. the Board election. A-frames have become an unlikely source of *Actually just a bit rude tbh. that was pulled together by a few revue personal- . controversy in the USU elections for the second ities two years ago, it also has the potential to be People without political power write short nice word year in a row. If you don’t know what an a-frame How many people are running again? Actual Real Funny. It’s free, too. book. American people who love other people the is go read a better section of this paper, they’re same respond to violence and bad thing about that 1. I’m a loser the flimsy, painted signs that are put out by cam- On Tuesday last week, independent candidate The power behind the throne and write short nice word. Since the bad bank thing, paigners each election season for the purpose of Zhixian Wang was excluded from the election (you people realise that the government not care about The Beatles falling over at the slightest whiff of a breeze and can read all about this on page 5). But on Monday One of the quirks of the USU Board is that the them. This means that people lose hope in politics being trodden on. at 12am, she was allowed to begin campaigning executive (president, honorary secretary, etc.) is to protect them from bad thing, including not have 2. Torn However, despite their tendency for self-sabo- again, following a decision by the Electoral Arbiter elected by the incoming board — that is, with five money and be treat bad. Many writers write short tage, it’s considered high treason* to deliberately overruling her exclusion. or six new members — rather than the full outgo- nice word book about this as a way to do political Natalie Imbruglia fell someone’s A-frame. Yet a video on Jacob Wang’s brief exclusion likely made a few other ing board. As a result, people who have worked work without power or political will. Masina’s campaign page (set to Chumbawamba’s candidates a bit more relaxed. It reduced the with the candidates for a year have no say in what Some writers write short nice word book in response 3. My Way song ‘Tubthumping’, aka ‘I get knocked down’) number of people vying for six spots from 10 to roles they will go on to occupy. The system encour- to violence like big gun shoot. One big gun shoot kill shows a number of students doing exactly that nine, and the number of women from six to five — ages current Board members to run likeminded many people who love other people the same and is Frank Sinatra to his. three of whom are guaranteed to be elected due candidates, so as to increase their own chances of bad. Many people blue about loss. Other people blue Last year, Honi reported similar damage being to affirmative action. Her re-entering the race at ascending to the executive. This year, Grace Franki about small violence less clear. Small violence against 4. Hurt inflicted on then-candidates Grace Franki’s and such a late stage of the game — particularly with is backing Liliana Tai; Esther Shim is back to her people who love other people the same not on televi- Esther Shim’s A-frames. Shim also penned an preference deals likely finalised and how-to-votes Liberal roots, supporting Jacob Masina; James sion, can only find on line if you know where to look. Johnny Cash open letter to the culprits in Honi, saying “stop printed — will definitely throw off a few fellow Gibson is on the hustings for Caitlin McMenamin; Because people who love other people the same damaging my property; it’s disrespectful and a candidates. However, she’s also missed three and a and Vanessa Song is shilling for Claudia Gul- hard to find sometimes, they find each other on line 5. Hurt waste of both of my time and resources…I’m half days of campaigning — which is quite a signif- bransen-Diaz. Of the first year directors, only Yifan where you can be not know and be safe. On line is running out of cable ties.” icant proportion of the eight-day race. Kong and Courtney Thompson have not formally where the short nice word book is. Thus, political Nine Inch Nails However, it seems this brave act of political See more about how this all pans out in our live endorsed a candidate. power through short nice word for people who love defiance has lived to see another election. blog (as if you weren’t reading already). each other the same can be find on line. 6. I don’t care Also on the A-frame front, Honi can reveal that a ruling by the Returning Officer (RO) stipulating A revue by any other name New P&C Fall Out Boy A-frames “must be supervised by a responsible Association members person at all times” (lest they, you know, shit in Over recent years, the USU’s revue schedule has announced 7. In the end the pool) has been readily enforced. A number of expanded quickly to fill out a full identity revues Wednesday. Come campaigns have had their A-frames confiscated season. This week, a brand new revue for a woe- along for the results, Linkin Park because they have not been providing adequate fully underrepresented group will debut: Hack stay for the supervision, and have had to retrieve them from Revue. Some fresh young faces like Cameron Cac- Lil’ Wayne. 8. Don’t dream it’s over the RO. camo, Michael Rees, Mary Ward, and Victoria Ze- Honi reported last year that this new require- rbst are involved. To everyone’s surprise, it is an Crowded House ment was introduced following the vandalism Actual Real Thing going down on Wednesday night Target Crossword

Accross: Down Con’t: 19. Sean _____ 35. Medicinal amount 1. Tire filler 4. Thick soup 20. Spoil 37. Suez or Erie 4. Smoking device 5. Singer ____ Hayes 21. Lode load 38. Unaccompanied 8. Egg on 6. Gasoline, in England 22. Strike back 40. Penny pincher 12. Chem., e.g. 7. Burns “before” 23. Expected 41. Obliterate 13. Operator 8. On the ocean 27. Made Amends 43. Moonstruck actress 14. Mall event 9. Classical dancer 29. Lasso 46. Fido’s foot 15. Pull apart 10. Actress ____ Barkin 30. Belgium’s cont 47. Corn piece 17. She, in Valencia 11. Pulls apart 32. Cow chow 48. Shooter’s group 18. Char 16. Assault 33. Compass pt. 49. Fore’s opposite 19. More wan 20. Telegraph symbols (2 wds.) 24. Printing measures 25. Vicinity 26. Off the moon 28. Go to bed 31. Tempt 34. Orally 36. Responsibilities 37. Pres. Coolidge 39. Square dance figure 42. Rocker ______Cooper 44. Beget 45. Ark skipper 46. Rose Bowl city 50. Poker opener 51. Eons 52. Pound sign 53. Ogle 54. “Wish you ____ here” 55. Traitor Target Rules: Minimum 6 letters per word. 5 words: ok, Down: 10 words: good, 15, very good, 20 words: ex- 1. Mule’s father cellent. Solution in next week’s Honi. 2. Frozen Water 3. Tear

21 Fidget spinners Esports event Quiz: How pro-Assad Review: BBC Cribs welcomes us are you? ineffective turns violent Ann Ding Hal Fowkes tural knowledge to be somewhat relevant to the house being built, McCloud’s attempts to Entertainment Reporter New toy keeps kids focused, Hooligans turn convention Political Editor insert witty, trendy dialogue creates confu- sion as to whether he is talking about a house but can’t distract me from center to bloody hellscape BBC Cribs, the long-anticipated collabora- or a one night stand. tion between MTV Cribs and BBC’s Grand The show also seems to take some fur- the inevitability of death P9» after Cloud9 loses to TSM P4» Designs, premiered on BBC2 last Saturday ther creative inspiration from another MTV to mixed reviews. Host Kevin McCloud (or staple, Pimp My Ride. In attempts to make a McCloud Nine, as he is now known) aims to state-of-the-art house in the middle of no- bring together both overly intellectual par- where even more useless, McCloud and the ents and their too-cool-for-school teens in “BBC Boyz” install a ridiculous number of the beautiful family bonding experience that luxury items, including a SodaStream pool, is afternoon television. gold-plated windows and a doorbell that The show, much like Grand Designs, follows plays DMX’s “X Gon Give It To Ya”. the building of a multimillion-dollar house It’s hard to tell whether BBC Cribs will for a yuppie couple whose dream is to live in continue into further seasons. McCloud has a house somewhat resembling the Teletubbies expressed his enthusiasm, saying it was a residence — but with a few MTV tweaks. great way to connect to his children (who are Instead of his signature droned narration, presumably mad that he spends his life with McCloud delivers a steady stream of slangy families looking to upgrade their residence). catchphrases. It’s hard to tell what audience Whilst he has the know how to maintain some McCloud is targeting with interjections like integrity, younger viewers will undoubtedly Crazy: this innovator has plans for a car that Student achieves tantric “Bro, these thatched roofs are bitchin’!” or be wondering, “Who the fuck is this British “You’d be a straight up fool to not stan hard dude and why is he dry humping that foun- will completely disrupt the automotive market orgasm while closing for this modernist design, fam.” While his tain?” How many ‘sounds x but okay’ Facebook narration communicates enough architec- internet tabs after com- groups are you part of? a. How many what? pleting assignment b. Just the ‘sounds fake but okay’ one c. Three or four Jayce Carrano d. My entire news feed is stuff from those groups (that and political compass memes) Education Editor If you could change one thing about your- self, what would it be? a. My prohibitively large dick b. I am pretty comfortable with myself c. I am also pretty comfortable with myself d. My embarrassingly small dick A real socialist: a. goes to the National Day of Action on May 17 b. campaigns for universal basic income c. punches Nazis d. supports dictators How often do you find yourself inexplicably jacking off to snuff porn? USyd student Jonathan Fryer simultane- a. This has never happened to me ously climaxed and reached enlightenment b. Just once, but it was years ago last night after finishing his 2000-word c. Around once a month Aidan Molins His name is Larry and he tells you jokes essay for Government and International d. Twice in the last 24 hours Relations which was due at midnight. How much ‘theory’ have you read? Technology reporter whenever you’re in the car.” Devins, only 7 years of age, first start- “I feel like the thirteen hours I spent on a. What kind of theory do you mean? ed on the project after his teacher asked that assignment yesterday were this fever- b. I don’t have much time to read theory Kevin McCloud AKA McCloud Nine in the first episode of BBC Cribs. Wow. While the huge auto giants in De- his class what kind of vehicle they’d like ish, frantic, Redbull-fueled foreplay, lead- c. I read Wiki pages and a ton of tweets troit churn out the same old boring car de- to use in the future, and he hasn’t stopped ing to a final release” Fryer said. d. When I shut my eyes all I see is theory signs year after year, this young innovator working on it project since. As a magnan- As Fryer began to close the 52 internet How good was Stalin? is planning the release of a wildly innova- imous face of the company, Devins heralds tabs he had opened, he also began to expe- a. Are you kidding me? Astrophysicists share unedited pictures of the tive automotive innovation that will make himself as the visionary behind the design, rience the strongest orgasm of his life. b. Pretty sure he was not good you rethink the way you conceive of per- even putting himself in the driver’s seat of “It just kept going and going, every tab c. So good cosmos to combat unrealistic beauty standards sonal transport. the Vroom Vroom’s concept design. of E-Readings I closed felt even better than d. SO GOOD It’s a model Jamie Devins calls: ‘the Other groundbreaking features of the the last,” Fryer said. When he started clos- How good was Mao? Vroom Vroom’. At the core of its design is car include a fully functional roof mounted ing the randomly selected Google Scholar a. That’s actually not funny its power generating mechanism. For about laser beam, an ice-block holder, a puppy, articles he had used to fluff up his bibliog- b. Did some good things but is ultimately bad a century, automakers have only offered and a helicopter on the top, “so the car can raphy, the “rolling hills of pleasure” only c. So good cars powered by one fuel: petroleum. But go ‘brrrshhh’ and fly away if it wants”. became more frequent. d. SO GOOD now, Devins’ new engine plans to disrupt With all these innovative features, it’s “I can still feel it. I’m shaking.” Fryer was Would you pull the lever in the trolley prob- their market: his engine runs on carrots. strange the Vroom Vroom only has only adamant his trembling had nothing to do with lem? “You put in the carrot in this hole, this reached $300 million in its first round of the nine No-Doz he took within six hours. a. The what, sorry? one,” Devins explains, “and that goes into venture capital funding. “I think I probably orgasmed for longer b. Of course I would! the car and it goes ‘woah!’ and then that Critics of the industry revolutionising than it will take my tutor to give me a low c. Not if my mum was on the other track makes the car go vroom vroom.” car have argued that it is just a concept — pass but, honestly, after that experience, I d. Of course I wouldn’t! It’s a simple yet elegant design that re- that it only currently exists as an idea that don’t even care anymore.” ally shows how backwards and stagnant the has no feasible means of being produced, According to Fryer, the experience was Detroit car industry has been in recent years. and that it’s a poor investment strategy to almost spiritual in nature. Another way the car blows its stone age heavily invest in products that have no via- “I climaxed so hard I transcended our Mostly ‘a’: Not pro-Assad at all. Nice one! competitors out of the water is with its soft- ble path to mass production. physical realm,” he added, “I had an inner You’re a broadly left-leaning person and you ware system. Most cars today have a primitive In a statement to the press, Devins de- journey and reached a lot of deep truths. know a bad regime when you see one. operating system which runs programs like clines that the Vroom Vroom has hit back at I’m not going to procrastinate so much on Mostly ‘b’: Probably not pro-Assad. Nice one! maps and music. However, the Vroom Vroom his critics. these assessments anymore.” You’ve avoided the all-too-common trap of is a huge step forward from this. Its operating “Nuh-uh. I’m gonna get lots and lots When asked whether his newfound wis- being an active supporter of a dictatorship. system is more than a technological flourish: and lots of money and I’m gonna build a dom would motivate him to get an early Mostly ‘c’: Still not an Assadist. Nice one! it not only fully autonomously regulates the big big factory and there’s gonna be a mil- start on his next essay, due in five days, Stick to the Jacobin articles and the ironic entire car’s functioning, it also provides the lion-bajillion cars.” Fryer’s response was upfront. endorsement of Maoism and you’ll be sweet. Scientists have been signal boosting images of the universe which haven’t been edited (right) user with rich, seamless conversation. “Geez, I said I had a spiritual awaken- Mostly ‘d’: Sounds like you’re an Assadist. to combat the trend of cosmic images which have been heavily colorised and photoshopped (left). “Yeah, yeah, I made him a friendly car. ing, not that I could perform miracles.” Boo! Bad job! You chose the wrong side! Full story: P8»