VOLUME 62, ISSUE 19 AUGUST 9 1988 FREE (but chocolate fish are now being accepted as donations) ■ e r J I s INDULGENCE Well, congratulations plebs, you've just managed to elect THE USUALS the most inexperienced AUSA Executive in living memory. Given the choice of candidates this year that's hardly sur­ prising, but where you really blew it was in unanimously A rts ...... 12-13 electing the "United Exec.". They had candidates standing Crosswords/Cartoons...... 17 for 10 of the 11 portfolio positions for 1989, as well as Crac­ cum Editor and AVP for the rest of 1988, and you put every Letters ...... 19-20 single one of them in. Brilliant! So now we not only have an Exec, that for the most part has no idea what it's doing, Life, the University & Everything...... 3 but which is so one-sided that they can pass any motion which might be of special interest to them, no matter what Music ...... 8 most of you think, and which is, for the most part, against your newly-elected President. After all, as I personally Notices ...... 18 understand it (no doubt they'll correct me if I'm wrong), one of the main reasons it was formed in the first place Politics ...... 9 was an intense paranoia about what the Engineers intend­ ed to do in the way of restructuring AUSA and it's Ex­ Slings & Arrow s...... 4 ecutive. So how big was this supposed "threat" by the Engineers ? A half-dozen candidates, half of whom weren't Sports ...... 18 even Engineers! Now, instead of having a fairly balanc­ ed Exec, of people that might have been able to do something constructive with our Association, which many former members see as long overdue, we have a group of FEATURES people, led by a few who actually know what they're do­ ing, which appears to have no such intention. It's easy to AUSA Accounts 1987 ...... 15-16 stack an SRC, or even a General Meeting, now Executive's stacked as well. Of course, there are some members of Ex­ Computer Tid-Bits...... 7 ec. that have proved perfectly capable of doing their The Cafe Q uestion...... 5 respective jobs, and some of those that have just been elected MAY prove equally capable, but Exec, is also about The Independent, Alternative Movie Scene 10-11 discussion between tne various members in a reasonable and responsible manner with (all) your interests at heart. Storyteller of the 'Urban Legend'...... 13 They may discuss things, but they are supposed to be United. Who for? All of us? Or them? Think about it. It may Winter General Meeting Agenda...... 14 be too late to do anything about it now, but there's always next year. You should keep a close eye on what they are, or should be, doing. I know I will. (Before all you new Exec, people start trooping up to Craccum to have a bleat about what I've just said let me Fbstal Address: Craccum point out a few things. ONE: As I don't have to worry about Phone No: A.U.S.A. Craccum next week, I will actually have a chance to study Private Bag 390-789 ext 840 and probably won't be here much anyway. TWO: No, it's Auckland. Advertising ext 841 not sour grapes because I didn't make it in. I said exactly the same things before the Election. THREE: I was actually going to vote for six of you before hearing about the ticket, and actually did vote for two of you, so don't try and tell me it was anything personal) Enough of all that political crap. The end of another term Once upon a time there was a disclaimer. No a great big, is nigh and we're in for another round of tests and huge, pretentious legal monstrosity of a disclaimer. Just assignments. Don't forget that there's no law against relax­ a little "None of this is our fault" disclaimer. And one day, ing occasionally between exercising your braincells. Take while he was wandering around amongst the hard disks time off for a beer, or whatever else you do to relax. I'll and typewriter ribbons he was kidnapped by some horri­ be making my usual effort to get to the pub as often as ble Editor types and imprisoned in a small newspaper of I can. Maybe I'll see you there? a most disreputable nature. And there he was force fed Have a good holiday and enjoy your ski trip, or Winter with long diatribes form obscure dictionaries and the Tourney, or whatever and we'll see you tired and shagged literary rantings and ravings of the nasty, insane Editor until out as usual next term. he was so fat with meaningless ramblages of words that Gort he could hardly fit on the page. And when, after a while, the Editors decided he was ready they put him to work on The Eds; Miriam de Graaf, Simon WohoycL the second page of the newspaper, and the people gasped in amazement because he was no longer boring, but was Typesetting: Barbara Hendry & Kerry Hoole now the most witty and interesting and exciting disclaimer Printers: Putaruru Press in the world. Distribution: Graham Hackshaw And he read thus: Craccum is a source of free expres­ Advertising: Kerry Hoole Ph. (09) 366-0413 sion for Auckland University students and the University community. Craccum is not the official publication of the Auckland University Student's Association or of the Univer­ Writers: Sean Hoobin, Mark Broatch, Daphna sity of Auckland. Both bodies may not endorse or agree Whitmore, Aiden-B.Howard, Kerry Hoole, Rohan Stace. with opinions expressed within Craccum, and the Editors Layup Assistants: Sandra Murray, Richard Eltringham are going to be the first up against the wall come the Cover: Roger Langridge revolution. Thanks also to Paul Casserley last week for saving our Then he was run over by an ARA bus. And TTN rejoiced, necks by printing the rest of the election photos! because they had been right after all.

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"MY ATTEMPTS TO­ / WARDS OVERCOMING THE LOCKER'S INHAB­ ITANT HAD LEFT ME 'TN THE AREAS I KNOW WORSE THAN BEFORE. .ITTLE ABOUT. 2 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 1988 CDNTD-- P 9 « • • •

THE END OF

MONEY! UNDERAGE Would all those election candidates who had bromides done at Craccum for their posters: There was a relatively high turnout SRC Chair Fiona Stevens the credit season is over—we want your for voting last week - 1505 students Welfare Officer Richard Cornes money now! Every cent of it! Your money voted which is over 10% of the student National Affairs' Officer Leigh or your life! But seriously, $5 will be fine, DRINKING Rampton but a.s.a.p. population. This also meant that the Overseas Students' Officer John vote counters were counting from 7pm Utanga WARNING! Wednesday night till at least 5.30am Womens Rights' Officer Judith All those with overdue accounts with AUSA, if you don't pay up now, your name ON the following morning. The entire Knight will be printed in the next Tres Sez column. team on the ‘united’ ticket were voted Craccum Editor Aidan-B. Howard The next issue isn't till after the August in. Administrative Vice-President holidays so pay up if soon if you don't want CAMPUS? Here's who won: (for the rest of 1988) your precious name in disrepute forever! Cultural Affairs' Officer Michael Beatle Treadwell If the new Liquor Licensing Act Heath-Caldwell MEDIA WORKSHOP is passed it will raise the legal drink­ Environmental Affairs' Officer Dot Craccum may be holding a workshop dur­ ing age from 18 to 20. This means Barrington I want to express my most sincere ing the holidays on Sunday August 28. We'll appreciation to all the people who show you some of the administrative, that although at 18 you can marry, International Affairs' Officer Kevin Hague helped in the recent portfolio election, technical and editorial details about putting join the work-force and pay taxes, together a newspaper, or anything else rele­ Media Officer Ella Henry especially all those people who stayed vant you're intererested in. Anyone is buy a house, and vote (which also Societies' Representative Debra counting votes all night. entitles you to decide on Liquor welcome and it's free. If interested, give us Francis Thank you. a ring on 390-789 ext 840 or see us on the laws in the accompanying referen­ Sports' Officer Gina O'Shea Pilar Alba Returning Officer second floor of the Student Union Building. dum papers), but you are con­ sidered still not responsible enough STUDENT STUDY TOUR OF to consume alcohol. Make sense? THE PHILIPPINES This will also mean Shadows will ISIC CARD FRAUD If you're considering going overseas this have to close, and it could also be summer, but want to visit somewhere a lit­ that if more fraudulent cards are the end of student functions on As a result of several fake ISIC tle more unusual, exciting and affordable, found then the student discount then the Philippines Study Tour is for you. campus. cards having been used to obtain will no longer be available. The dis­ The study tour hopes to give you a broad A letter-writing campaign the student discounted lift passes count on an all-day lift pass is $10, ' and general overview of the current situa­ against this bill is getting under at Turoa Ski Field in recent weeks, tion in the Philippines. It will be really reducing the cost from $39 to $29. way.Submissions are to attack the three people are now facing pro­ challenging and lots of fun—you will have bill based on the 'Youth Issue'. Send secution. Craccum has been told the opportunity to experience Filipino socie­ ty at 'grass-roots' level, and see a perspec­ submissions to any MP of your tive of a vastly different and diverse coun­ choice, addressed to Parliament, try that you could never expect to ex­ Wellington (postage is free). perience as a tourist. CONFIRMED: FEES The tour which went ahead in January of this year was a great success. It was so much fun and really exciting, so the extend­ ed second study tour is going to be even bet­ WILL INCREASE ter than the first. The student study tour is scheduled to STRIPTEASE A letter from the University depart for the Philippines on January the Grants Committee to the Vice 23rd, and will last for four weeks, arriving Chancellors has indicated that back in New Zealand on February 22nd. university fees will increase, and on Tentatively, costs will be around $2,200 all SCANDAL- inclusive. (This means: airfare, accommoda­ top of that, the fees subsidy will be tion costs, and daily expenses it may even before the event that this went cut. extend to a little shopping! against policy, and claims the The letter explains the effect of If you are interested then please write WHAT REALLY organiser accepted the Associa­ recent university funding decisions to: tion's position regarding this. He and suggests that University Coun­ Philippines Study Tour Collective PO Box 68523, Auckland said that Margaret Rabbitt, who cils should consider whether 'fur­ If you have any queries phone: Susannah was present and responsible for the ther income should be generated Downing Ph 7 6 0-001 HAPPENED? catering, wasn't aware that these through a larger fee increase' than goings-on were against policy. Ac­ the usual inflation adjustment. FLAG CONTEST Further to last week's story con­ cording to the organiseer after the The letter also indicates that cerning the striptease shows at a event, Stan got the understanding any fee increase is unlikely to be Results still aren't out—watch next issue of Craccum (next term). rugby club stag do, held in the cafe that the strip was impromptu; subsidised. (Currently all full-time the weekend before last, it seems organised by a member of the students get subsidised 75% of that the female strippers were not group. (If this was the case, being their fees i.e. instead of paying the only 'entertainment'. Mud impromptu is no reason to let it $288 you only have to pay $72). wrestling also took place. If you've continue). The extra $11 million funding for been to the cafe this week you may FOLLOW-UP TO However, at an Executive universities announced in the have noticed the still mud- Meeting last Thursday, a lengthy budget is clearly not sufficient to splattered curtains. A letter was report was presented by Union hold back such desperate received from the cleaners, who Manager Madeline McNamara. This measures. ACTION DAY were disgusted by the mess left report showed that unorthodox The letter says that Phil Goff, behind, aptly describing it as a pig procedures were used in the book­ Associate Minister of Education, is sty. Thick clay had been smeared ing and organisation of the Func­ anxious that no action be taken un­ all over the floor, splattered tion, considering the nature of it be­ til the Government has considered N0.2 everywhere - up the walls, curtains, ing an all-male rugby club event. the Hawke Report on tertiary 1. FEEDBACK - Anyone is welcome doors and furniture. Apparently the The report also contained a lot of funding. to forward any ideas, constructive floor had also been damaged. As evidence that pointed It'll be a while before anyone criticism etc to the Student Union. described in the letter, 'it looked as to the possibility that Stan Lockie knows just how much our fees will 2. PETITIONS & LETTERS to M.P's. if it had been dug into, possibly by had some knowledge that these be, but rumours of 400% increases If you haven't seen and signed shovels'. The cleaners claimed that activities were still to take place are not uncommon. Then if the fees these yet, they're available at over the years they had worked in but was trying to suppress this subsidy is cut completely, this will AUSA reception, and will be sent these premises, never before had from the Association. amount to over $1000. collectively to Parliament on Friday they seen the facilities so abused. Whatever the case, what hap­ This is going to result in con­ 12th August. You must write your Mud wrestling is illegal without pened that night was unacceptable siderably fewer students enrolling address with your signature. We've a permit, and these permits are not and went against student policy - next year, and many not able to had a great response so far; and we easy to obtain. Not only is it illegal, with this sort of function there return, those that can are the finan­ haven't finished yet. Let the Govt it goes against AUSA policy made should have been some measures cially privileged ones. As NZUSA know how you feel and keep remin­ at a SRC meeting in June, as well taken to ensure that the club would president Andrew Little said, 'There ding them - they seem to need it. as University policy. adhere to policy, and the fact that should be no mistake. Open access 'Communication Rules!' says the So who's responsible? Catering this wasn't done shows a to higher education is at an end and Surrealist Fish. See you in the soup, Manager Stan Lockie said he had negligence of respect for 'student we will bear the consequences of made it clear to the organiser control of student affairs'. this in the future.' Clare Paterson-EV-P. CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 3 SUNGS AND ARROWS by Archer

Where Life and Limbs are Cheap - Alpha oil rig with its monstrous death toll. He ment expenditure. What it will actually do is In the Workplace was ordered to weld by a leaking gas pipe. He to hand over public services to big business, refused on safety grounds. That could have for whom profit is the only yardstick. And to cost him his job (a few days later, the burning get it, they will screw anyone and everyone. What would you say if, during an epidemic rig cost him his life). This sort of order is given of an often fatal, yet preventable disease, the daily on jobs in NZ, often with fatal results.The government of the day suddenly slashed the worker is reluctant not to comply, for fear of number of doctors by a third? Wouldn't you the sack. Are You Well Adjusted Yet? feel justified in condemning it as utterly Instead of cutting back on safety inspection, callous in regard to people's health? the Government should legislate - and the Remember Rob Campbell, one-time union Something quite similar to this is happening trade unions should demand it - to see that leader and critic of the government in power? in regard to accidents in the workplace. New workers have the right to refuse orders that Not so long back he was reported to have been Zealand's record in this sphere is very bad, jeopardise their safety. This is only one of appointed to the board of the Bank of New with 97 deaths and nearly 50,000 injuries - many ways that the appalling safety record in Zealand. He is at present deputy-chairman. many quite serious - for the year ending NZ can be improved. But it would be a start. In a news report (Auckland Star, 14.7.88) March, 1988. The death rate is higher than in appropriately headed 'Banker's View', Mr Britain, Japan, Finland, Sweden, Norway, New Campbell is reported to have said that the South Wales and Victoria. Yet instead of Government's economic reforms could force drastically increasing the number of Labour Turning the Screws New Zealanders to adjust to a lower standard Department safety inspectors to cut this hor­ of living. 'This is cold-hearted, but successful rific death and injury toll, the Government's economic policies will enable the country to 'restructuring' (one should read 'destructur­ We have mentioned in these columns before adjust,' said he to the Christchurch branch of ing') includes a 30% cut in their numbers! the dangers to the public of selling off essen­ the Society of Accountants on July 13. According to an Auckland Star article tial state services to private enterprise. The process begins with making an enterprise a How well Mr Campbell seems to have ad­ (3.7.88) Canada has 1.5 accidents for every justed - though not to a lower standard of 100,000 work hours. New Zealand has 10. state corporation with a private-type structure living. Of course, students can comfort themselves before handing it over to a private company with the thought that mostly (if they graduate) at a bargain price. We warned, in fact, that they will be in the professional and technical Telecom would turn the screws on prices. It has done just that already by upping the cost groups with a low accident rate. But even then Boss? (while studying) many take holiday jobs in pro­ of telephone services to hospitals and schools duction, transport, equipment operating and fivefold. And this before it is even privatised. labouring, where nearly 60% of accidents take The situation is Gilbertian indeed. Douglas ls the torching of Winnie Mandela's rented place. and Co. are selling up national assets to pay house in Soweto really attributable to children, Even if the number of factory and safety in­ off debt and economise on expenditure. But as South African official reports have it? It spectors were doubled, it would not still be the Government has to foot the bill for the new seems to us that behind the scenes the South nearly enough to establish a high standard of 'phone charges to hospitals and schools, African security police, 'Boxx', could well have accident prevention. As it is, the numbers are which will amount to tens of millions of been the prime mover in a reaction against the pitifully inadequate to cover a variety of oc­ dollars. Either that, or it cuts the 'phone ser­ sympathy for Nelson Mandela shown around cupations where safety slackness is rife. vices four-fifths. Whichever, this levy on the the world on his 70th birthday. After all, the There are many cases where workers are in­ public - for that is what it is - makes nonsense CIA is not the only force that plans and ex­ structed to perform tasks that are unsafe. Take of Government claims that their economic ecutes covert operations against critics of its the case of the worker on the British Piper policy will raise efficiency and reduce Govern­ government. Just keep Steve Biko in mind. T J U l V E B S i n

W kitfl on «ass ^ . The Radiant Way $ 14.99 Fools on the Hill $ 19.95

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HST |$10 off $10 off $10 off $10 off LADIES CUT MENS CUT PERM HENNA COMB ON SEMI­ & BLOW WAVE & BLOW WAVE OR HIGHLIGHTS PERMANENT COLOURS TOLEPHOTE771869 CUT OUT TlHIS ADVERT AND PRESENT TO OBTAIN DISCOUNT 4 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 1988 FAY RICHWHITE WINTER guitarist Pat Metheny, he combines attractive melodies with modern harmonies, guitar and JAZZ SERIES keyboard synthesisers forming a backdrop to his solos. Accompanying are David Lyons on City Art Gallery Auditorium keyboards, Simon Sheward on bass and Mike Sunday 1.30pm Fullerton on drums. $8/$4 students September 4 —Beaver and Hattie August 14—Modern Times and the Band Auckland's top jazz-rock group, Modern Beaver has a recording due out soon on Times has been around for five years. Led by RCA which includes live recordings from Lon­ Murray McNabb on keyboards, this band don performances, as well as the title tune features the names of Peter Woods on vibes from the TV series Gloss. She will be joined and synth, Billy Kristian on bass, Martin Winch by local blues singer Hattie for the final con­ on guitar and Rickie Powell on drums, each cert of this series. of these band members contributing composi­ tions to their fusion/jazz-rock/electric funk- KOKO TAYLOR COMES TO jazz repertoire. TOWN August 2 1 —Mike Booth Band Town Hall August 23 Aucklander Mike Booth is a freelance Tickets Bass $26.50 trumpeter and composer, playing regularly on jazz sessions and shows. He has performed A bad car accident earlier this year hasn't and recorded with Roger Fox, and also writes put off Koko's tour which was originally Koko Taylor and arranges music for various bands and planned for March. Since her recovery she has groups. Mike and pianist Lew Bobb, who headlined the first night of the Chicago Blues band The Blues Machine pump out blues returns to NZ after 25 years in Canada, will Festival for 8 5 ,0 0 0 people and also headlin­ steam with a considerable fury.'' perform a concert of jazz standards. ed the Mississippi Valley Blues Festival. Her first hit 'Wang Dang Doodle' came in Memphis born Koko, acclaimed as 'Queen 1964. In 1972 she formed her own group The August 28—The Graeme Webb Group of the Blues' is one of the few female blues Blues Machine, and in 1975 released the singers, as the Herald said, "a logical heir to forceful 'I Got What It Takes'. So far her Guitarist and composer Graeme Webb Bessie Smith, Memphis Minnie and Big Maria career has included eleven albums and specialises in modern fusion compositions. Thornton. Her style is raucous, harsh, a de­ numerous awards including a Grammy in Loosely based on those of popular American fiant cry of black pride and suffering and her 1984.

SINGLES Pop Mechanix—'Pale Sun' (WEA)

This is the big introductory single for the but they've succeeded in what they wanted another review won't do it any harm. The new Pop Mechanix with American Producer to do with this one. return of the man from The Band after a ten John Boylan. The production does them As for 'Pale Sun' —aptly titled, it could be year absence indicates that the time inbet- credit, the sounds are professional and it's seen as a wan version of a brilliance that the ween hasn't been wasted. A superbly crafted fine for the commercial market. However, it's Mechanix, with some stronger songs, have and highly sophisticated song, it conveys a not such a strong or distinctive song on the the potential to achieve. sense of mysticism and American past. An whole. Somehow it never quite hits you — MJ unusual touch is the voice of Sammy BoDean perhaps if the verses didn't drag on so much answering the chorus —while in ways this or if there was a fuller sound... detracts from the smoothness of the song, in I found it was the B-Side that I walked away Robbie Robertson— its contrast it also gives something back. The humming. 'It's Alright Here', though lacking 'Somewhere Down the B-Side 'Hell's Half Acre' is a harder, faster the lyrical content of its A-side, could be the guitar based track. Mechanix version of the Narcs 'Heart and Crazy River' Soul' —another commercial but likable NZ (Geffen, thru WEA) love-type song. Including some excellent MJ backing vocals, again it's not exactly original, This one's been out for a little while but

Sun' is aimed at a particular market which seems But Pop Mechanix aren't really out there to ATTACK OF THE to be responding. Radio stations are slowly wak­ spread the word—after so long in the business, all ing up to the fact that there is indigenous material the members are now singlemindedly aiming for that won't be out of place in the company of Mel commercial success. Especially after a disaster & Kim or Rick Astley. But aiming for a commercial back in the early 80's when they tried Australia. MECHANIX market is frustrating—the masses like something Musically, things were going great - they toured easy, something they know about. And too often with Split Enz, 'Jumping Out A Window' was 'leap­ this isn't much. Pop Mechanix find it a genuine pro­ Pop Mechanix have been around in some form ing' up the charts. However—the name Pop blem that they don't have 'Ooooh, Baby, I love you' or another for the past eight years. You may Mechanix was also owned by an Australian lyrics. They've found that more people relate to the remember 'Jumping Out A Window', or Coconut group. NZ's version lost the law suit. They lost the B-side because of the familiar lyrical content. Rough's 'Sierra Leone'. The man behind these, An­ use of their name, ane everything they had built drew McLennan, is back with most of the original Take the success of Wellington's Holidaymakers up at the same time—it proved that a name is more members under the old name but with new material reaching No 1 with Sweet Lovers—nothing wrong than just a label for a band. Todaly, they still can't use their name in some Australian states. far removed from their past. The new single 'Pale with it really, except that it's a gushy cliched love song—yeah, the masses feel comfortable with They have recently been playing under the name that, while the B-Side 'Sensible Shoes, is an Big Rehearsal. Why then have they returned to the original, at least as good as its A-side. In a more name which caused their earlier downfall? For a ideal world this is the one that deserves the charts. start, record companies gave the thumbs down to Back to Pop Mechanix—'Pale Sun' is one of their 'Big Rehearsal'—it probably sounded a bit tran­ more serious songs. It refers to Andrew's grand­ sitory. Whereas Pop Mechanix was a good father in WW1, speaking of Flanders Fields —the marketing name, it had important past associations meadow in France where small white crosses and a long history. Audiences grew when the stretch for miles; the same field where the Australa­ Rehearsal starting calling themselves the sians, 'use them, they're only colonials' were M e c h a n ix . ordered out of the trenches to attack, straight into In New Zealand it's a stigma if you've been in machine-gun fire. The Mechanix, however, find the music scene for too long, people lose interest. these words go past too many heads. Says drummer Peter Warren, ''It's a lot to do with

CRACCUM August 9 1988 that NZ attitude where we like to win at everything follow up with a high-budget professionally produc­ both very serious bands, with good musicians, and we seem to be more incensed with it since ed album. capable of giving great performances, and have we're such a small little nation... and you've got They don't think he's been too instrumental in good management and marketing behind them. U2, to make it...it's funny, people think, god, he's been orienting them towards an American sound, though in particular don't let themselves be dictated to by around for ages and he's not huge yet.." Says An­ this is what they've been aiming for. The band market forces. drew, "Friends say to me , 'so, are you still play­ wrote what they though was their most American The parting of ways of Peter War ■ ing in bands?' and I say to them, 'are you still a song, but Boylan saw it as fresh and different-to ren and Dave Dobbyn was a result of changing plumber, are you still doing carpentry? ...it puts his ears completely un-American. It seems that musical styles. Says Peter, "I'm still a rock and their perspective right...You don't be a musician most non-New Zealanders see our music, even roller and I'm not ready to go into that ballad stuff till 26 and then fall over dead and wake up the next when commercial, as alternative. Says Peter, "all yet... my drumming stlye dictates to me that I can't day as a lawyer." we've got to do is hone that alternative sound just sit there and play really slow quiet 4/4's for However, overseas, if you're under 25 and don't down until they really like it and want it " So, the rest of my time..." have a steady record of having played in one band what's wrong with our sound? The band deny any The overwhelming impression that these guys for at least five years, you have to be a musical pro­ compromise, insisting it's "change, not com­ convey is one of uncompromising optimism and digy, or have an uncle as a producer to get a deal. promise". They're quite happy to mould their sound single-minded motivation. Even when talking about Pop Mechanix are lucky to be in a situation where to market forces, at this stage in their musical conflict within the band, Andrew insists there's they are more attractive to producers. Important careers they know what they want and what they 'always a solution'. Oh well, nothing wrong with American producer John Boylan has picked them have to do to achieve it. positive thinking I guess... up, having produced this single and hoping to The bands they most admire are U2 and INXS — MJ

with all the financial details of last year. It is behalf. SRC REPORT - also your chance to see what we spend your The Northern Provincial Council refused to A U G U ST 3 fees on. The 1989 Budget will be delivered by separate the individual's action from the club Wayne McDougall but unlike the Govt's one, even tho' the Judge had. We were being blam­ I sometimes hear people say that nothing you can question it and even change it! ed and were lumbered with the fine. This was happens at SRC's. This week's meeting sup­ The WGM is your chance to have your say explained to the other Auckland clubs who ported that view. on how your money should be spent. We then supported our cause. The Northern Pro­ There were no apologies this week, politicos have been accused by the more vincial Council refused to listen to a majority although no Exec members turned up (they observant engineers of wasting their (and decision that their decision be revoked and the should have sent their apologies in). Nor were your) money. That's fair enough but now is the fine withdrawn. We are now being harassed there any minutes from last weeks meeting (it right time to thrash it out. I hope to see lots because we have questioned their (NPC) ac­ must have been as exciting as this one). There of you there - in the Rec Centre at 1pm. tion. It looks like we'll have to go to Arbitra­ were no announcements, no general business Other events coming up. I'll be having a tion because we know we're right (and they and, for those who hung around that long, no showdown with the Deans concerning your do too) ... yet another fight ...' elections. Sadly there were no awards either. tuition fees next year. The University Grants Meanwhile the year drags on and exams are Understandably, the meeting finished very ear­ Committee has recommended fees go up from not far away. Get as much work done during ly indeed. $288 to c.$320 at least but the UGC also in­ the break as you can, that way you'll be bet­ I did notice that there was a polling booth structed the universities to examine their own ter prepared for the onslaught. outside the bookshop and a blackboard with finances more closely with a view to fee in­ Good luck to the University Ghallenge team. something about an election on the 2nd and creases beyond $320. Auckland is financially They'll be taking on the others during the 3rd of August on it. stretched. The reactionaries will certainly pro­ holidays - just make sure you beat Canterbury Well, there will probably be another SRC pose an over-inflated figure hoping we will set­ - come back with the Shield or the title or next week, so if YOU think that they are bor­ tle at about $500. I'll be doing my best to keep don't come back at all. ing then why don't YOU turn up with your fees down to $320, (although I am out­ Winter Tournbament is also on down at something interesting to discuss? numbered 12-1). Massey. If you live around there or want Meanwhile the Soccer Club is still being something different to do come along , spec­ R. Eltringham threatened with expulsion from the League tate, support and socialize. because they haven't paid a fine of $6000. Enjoy your break - Until I got involved I did not realise how amaz­ (i.e. SRC was cancelled because of the ingly thick and pig headed the Auckland Soc­ Cheers elections.) cer administrators are. When the University Club was axed from RAF FOSTER’S SHOUT the National League in 1986, an Interim Injunc­ AUSA President tion was served upon the Football Association Hello All, to try and stop the next season starting until Many thanks to all those who helped with the Today and tomorrow is our/your Winter it had all been discussed. This court action March, Beatle, Michelle, Ella, Fiona, Clare, General Meeting. This is where we bore you was taken by one individual on the Club's Annobo etc.

WRESTLE-MANIA!! VIC SQUID DISHES OUT JAPANESE STOMACH THROWS! YES. WRESTLING is back on TV. forget the beautiful face of King Curtis screamed myself hoarse yelling out Think back to the days of South Pacific growling into the camera! Yeah - those 'head butt Joe' (he did). It was unreal Television and 'On the Mat' with Steve were the good old days with Big seeing rabid pensioners forcibly Rickard and Ernie Leonard. Who can Mulumba (drinking blood), Samoan Joe restrained from clambering into the □ B E (head butt Joe!) the Assassin, Larry ring. We even tried to get someone to O'day, Harley Race etc. Then the co­ bop Barry Holland (maybe an abdominal host changed to Barry Holland (the git stretch or Indian death lock) but unfor­ on the vacuum and houses-on-wheels tunately he survived. squid commercials) whom Steve Rickard had Anyway, tuned in to Wrestlemania on to constantly correct - 'no Barry that Thursday to see wrestling American- the American socio-economic .political wasn't a Japanese stomach drag'. Disneyland style. Maximum 30 system and ethic, or I could tell you Anyway, back then the matches seconds of coverage before they inter­ how Andre the Giant tried to strangle were long but always involved equal view someone but I must admit they Macho man first with his fists, then by amounts of action for each wrestler (or pull some great faces. The gimmicks wrapping his tights around his neck un­ wrestlers) and the inevitable 'come are a bit much nowadays and wrestlers til Macho man hit him on the head with back' or 'off the ropes' and 'show of don't need to be particularly ugly a 2 by 4. Andre was out cold until he strength'. Rickard called out all the (Ravishing Rick Rude for instance) woke up and began dealing out thank moves - aeroplane spin, standing surf­ although yum yum beautifuls like An­ yous to the attendants hovering around board, body slam etc, and once came dre the Giant make up for that. him. He biffed some out of the ring, he running out of the showers (still wet) All the matches are fast and usually banged two heads together then to get into some tag match action. Even one-sided with the losing dude usually started laying into a camera man. (An­ the American wrestling shows were slung out of the ring or kicked etc after dre is obviously making a deep state­ fairly low budget back then, relying on the end. The wrestlers (and managers ment against media control!) big ugly men and/or women and - taking a high profile) do their best to However next, as an inert attendant sometimes dwarfs smashing the shit antagonize the intelligent and discern­ is dragged from the ring by his leg, An­ out of each other in the ring with heaps ing art-crowd audience (the Russian dre runs over and quote 'Andre stood of theatrical embellishments and over- pair for instance) who number up to on his head, he stepped on that young the-top grim acing, grunting, bleeding, 20,000!!!! mans head!' Put that in your art gallery begging etc. At this stage I could either begin a and smoke it. My favourite was when a woman complicated analysis of the significance wrestler biffed one at referee Jack Ken­ of the commercialized mass-market Stiven E. Sinkov dall and knocked him out. Fortunately take-over of what was once a popular (Stop asking me if it's me you plebs) I attended (in disguise of course), the culture artefact and relate the media last ever 'On the M at' match and mythologization to some reflection of 6 CRACCUM August 9 1988 e o m P U T E R T I D - B I T S

BRIGHT SPARK, STUDENT IDEAL

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FEATURES Speed : 4.77 or 9.54 MHz Real Time Clock : Built in. Memory. Co-Processor slot : Built in. The Spark comes with 640 Memory : 640 K RAM Kilobytes of Random Access Operating System : " MS-DOS Memory (RAM) on board so will Screen Resolution: 80 Chars x 25 lines have no problems fitting large pro­ 'J & r 320 x 200 Medium Res. grams into memory. 640 x 200 High Res. 4 shades of colour in Medium Res. Screen. Drives : 2 x 720 K, 3 1/2 " The LCD screen is one of the Optional external 360 K, 5 1/4 " clearer ones I've seen. It can be set Ports : External RGB at any angle, making it usable in all Composite B&W RCA Jack sorts of positions. The screen has a liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimimiiuiiiiE Serial 640 X 200 pixel (dot) high resolu­ Parallel tion mode which is equivalent to the Internal Modem IBM's CGA board and hence it will Dimensions : 13.2" x 13" x 2.5" run any programs that can be con­ Weight : Approx 4 Kg figured to CGA. The machine also has ports so either a CGA moniter AFFORDABLE COMPUTING Portability or a composite black and white ! Weighing only about 4Kg this makes monitor can be plugged in and used I the machine an easy one to carry. It Once plugged in, switching back to ;can be battery powered (NICAD the LCD Screen can be done easily jRechargables) or plugged into the at any time. IBM COMPATIBLE—MSDOS ;mains through an adaptor. The bat- [teries last about six or seven hours The Keyboard. land when getting low, a warning The Keyboard is a condensed ver­ llight shows up as well as a warning sion of a typical IBM Clone Ion the screen and the machine Keyboard. It has 77 keys including I beeps at 15 sec intervals. This ap- 10 function keys, a numeric keypad ; parently means you have enough oversized return key and arrow SPARK LAPTOPS [time to save the file you are work- keypad. ling on and quit. from $1695 + G S T Summing up. [Booting Summing up the SPARK with the When you start up the Spark, right software is an ideal machine [with the DOS disk in the drive, you for Word processing those essays or [have the option of changing various assignments, keeping track of that Smachine settings such as the pro­ data, or just playing games. And at cessor speed (4.7 or 9.54 MHz) and the price of $2 295 and dropping FULL RANGE OF HARDWARE ^whether you are using the built in fast it is definitely an affordable ■LCD screen or an external monitor. BACKUP ACCESSORIES, machine. MODEMS FROM $250, DISKS, BINS, MICE, PRINTERS FROM $ 395 + GST.

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SUPPORT V CENTRE

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THE BREWERS' the assistance of the Shakespeare Brewery and Brewers Supplies Presents: BREffFEST The Brewing and Alternative Beer Festival

-300 Watt sound system to -Entry Fee includes FREE rage the night out. tasting of 5 different Home Door Price : Guild Members $ 3 B r C W S • Non-Members $ 5 (Membership $ 3)

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8 -4 CRACCUM August 9 1988 Exorbitant prices for less than acceptable food? Criminal, or justified?

Enough of these mumblings and grutterings at a rate of 8% of their earnings. And then, The only reason, says Wayne, why we've about cafe pies and exploited students. I throughout the year, to compensate for their been able to survive without fees increases thought I'd try to find out why we're paying short working year, they are given an addi­ is the massive improvement in catering. He prices comparable to those in town, for food tional 10c per hour (for those who have work­ believes that if outside contractors were that one rarely hears praise for, in a catering ed here for a year) all the way up to an extra brought in to run catering, there would be system that pays no rent, makes few profits $1.00 per hour for those who have worked higher prices, and none of the benefits to and should be a student service. here for 10 years. Also, it costs to keep staff students that we currently enjoy. (Take a lot available to work at functions during the at the example of Victoria University further holidays etc. Staff are paid substantially in this article). HISTORICAL PERSPECTIVE above award rates to begin with. According to Wayne we have very little 2. Subsidies: Many things are provided as stu­ control over our income. In our current situa­ For a start, let's look at the history of AUSA dent services, and don't make a profit, and tion, prices in Shadows, and rents of AUSA catering. President Richard Foster was the must then be made up for by higher cafe houses etc, are not going to rise. The only op­ likely candidate to ask about this—with 10 prices. There's no way that Budget Meals and tion he sees is increased fees. years here, he's one of the few with a Chef's Specials could ever make a profit or perspective. break even, so these are subsidised. Richard has few complaints, if any, about Then there are subsidies of student func­ THE MANAGERIAL the present catering. Considering that a few tions. Clubs are allowed to purchase things PERSPECTIVE years ago the place was a hole, the food was like alcohol, food etc from stores at cost price. pretty bad, the prices were just as high, if not « This subsidy amounts to $25 000 a year. Then it was time to talk to Stan Lockie, the more, and, they were making huge losses. In They are not charged for the costs of order­ Catering Manager himself, to see how he felt 1983 catering lost $200 000! In 1986 the ing, storing and handling the goods or ad­ about the situation. Though often vague in his loss was about $70 000. The 1983 loss was ministration involved. Don't forget clubs also answers, he is confident that things are as ef­ due to bad management, being run by a hire rooms at cheaper rates, and much of the ficient as they can be with the aforemention­ 'Catering Management Subcommittee' (a cer­ administration of their functions, like the costs ed financial constraints. tain recipe for disaster). The staff worked of cleaners, custodians, supply of goods etc, He believes that in general our prices are under bad conditions, students purchased are subsidised and add up to an extra $30 000 lower than those off-campus, but doesn't under bad conditions. Queues were so long, per year. These hidden costs mean that prices dispute that some items can be bought many had finished their lunches before they have to be higher throughout the system. cheaper elsewhere. He has some policies to reached the cashier to pay for them. Much of 3. Opening hours: Another student service direct him—one of these is keeping prices the the food that wasn't eaten before it could be which has to be be subsidised, they keep same all year. At the start of the year he sets paid for, was stolen. some of the outlets open longer than is his prices at that of local retailers, but tries to Richard has nothing but praise for the cur­ economic—the Coffee Bar for example, stays stick to these all year. 'Recommended price' rent catering manager Stan Lockie who, from open late to cater for students staying late at products (like most of the stock in the Milk 1987, turned these burdening losses into a the library. Bar), go up with general price increases. This small profit. Also as a student service, the cafe is open is where Stan has another policy. While he for a large part of the holidays. Although it tries to keep down the prices of 'necessities' places a 10c surcharge on all prices, this still like filled rolls etc, food that comprises a FINANCIAL PERSPECTIVE doesn't cover costs.. staple lunch, then luxuries, things not im­ 4. Depreciation: The equipment and facilities mediately necessary for a student's survival, OK, we've got it established that things are can't stop depreciating in value just because are priced for those that want them. a hell of a lot better than they were. But we it's the holidays and no-one's using them. Select-a-sandwich, for example —if you still haven't found out the answer to the in­ want the luxury of a sandwich with exactly itial question. It was time to ask AUSA While last year they budgeted to break what you want in it, you'll have to pay the ex­ treasurer Wayne McDougall. even, but made a small profit of $8,400, this tra for that luxury. These luxury items keep Many things quickly fell into place. Probably year they have budgeted for a loss of $14, down the prices of the necessary ones. the main reason for high prices is that cater­ 000. This was the result of a forecast of a ma­ Another factor affecting prices, is their ef­ ing is only effective for 37 weeks of the year, jor drop in functions revenue. Outside groups forts to maintain a variety of food in the only 25 of these weeks in term-time when the who hire our premises and facilities are a ma­ cafeteria. Just Juice for example, may cost facilities are used properly and running at a jor source of income, the profits which go a little more because it makes up for the other profit, so there is only limited time to make back into keeping down the prices in the brands that may not sell so well. their revenue. However, there are overheads cafeteria. However, it seems AUSA is another Stan mentions that they also try to main­ with have to be covered for 52 weeks of the victim of the economic recession—fewer peo­ tain a variety of vegetables for in rolls etc, like year. Sure, there's no rent but there's these ple can afford to have functions here. The lettuce, tomato, cucumber that are out of things: new conference centre across the road on season and very expensive. This is the same 1 .Staff: Since staff are only employed for the Symonds St is also taking away a lot of our for any food outlet. However, the problems 30 or so weeks, they are given bonuses. business. While in 1987 functions made $75, that these other outlets don't have, is that These include four weeks of holiday with pay, 000, this year, the forecast is for $30 000. most of the cafeteria's business is in the

CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 9 winter months, and the time when they are working late, with the main cafe open till 7.30 least active (over the summer holidays) is and another till about 10pm. when things are the cheapest. So why can they do it when we can't? Like When I asked Stan about the charge of 20c us, their cafeterias are run by their Students' for a glass of water in the Coffee Lounge, he Association—these are subsidised and don't seemed to be unaware that it was this much, run at a profit. But how do they subsidise and admitted to this being a bit excessive. His them? By profits from outside functions and explanation was that for a start, the Coffee the Association bars, again like at Auckland. Lounge was more upmarket, and this was a However, according to AUSA treasurer labour charge—for the handling, washing of Wayne, it seems that they also own a large the glass etc. However, this seems against his number of houses for which they charge policy of subsidising necessary items with lux­ market rentals. These are considered as an in­ ury items, and I wouldn't call water a luxury. vestment, and profits from these go towards Perhaps water could be provided free and if the subsidy. So while Canterbury has market necessary, the 20c be added to something in­ price houses and student price catering, dulgent instead. AUSA keeps their houses as a welfare service Stan says he gets a minimum of complaints by keeping the rents down, but has market for the volume of people who go through the prices in the cafeteria instead. Coming from catering outlets. Most of these complaints he Wayne, one has to be aware of a bit of bias sees in Craccum, but he would prefer that in this explanation, but there could be a bit of people brought their complaints to him per­ truth in it, and the priorities regarding this is sonally. However, I'd beg to differ —it's im­ something which is still being looked at. portant that people bring their complaints in­ to the open, in the hope that they be resolv­ ed in the open, so others can have the benefit Victoria University of the explanation. As for Wellington's Victoria University, Some recent complaints have been about they've got it bad. A recently completed lack of food, particularly in the Human survey of students' attitudes to their catering, Sciences cafeteria, but like any other food estimates that 99% think the food is generally outlet they try to cut down on wastage. not fresh, and most consider the prices exor­ As for quality, most of the food is made bitant. Take these for example, and note the themselves, but some, like croissants, are distinct similarity to prices in Auckland: cof­ brought in. When there are problems with fee: 75c-90c, chips: $1.20, sandwiches: food quality, it is usually problems related to $1.55 (packets of two), pies: $ 1.30. They do the age of the food—this is where more care however, have light meals available for bet­ could be taken with storage and monitoring ween $3.50 and $6.50. lifespans of edible substances. Another of their complaints is lack of The restaurant currently makes a loss of variety —anything past the 'pie 'n' sand­ $5,000-$7,000, largely because Budget wiches type of grub is priced well out of meals and Chef's Specials are a student ser­ students' reach. Their opening hours are also vice and can't pay for themselves. Budgie pretty limited, most closing at 3, the latest meals, however awful they may be, are a wor­ open only until 7.30pm. thwhile student service—they'll fill you up for Their problem is that the catering is private­ only $1.80, which you couldn't get cheaper ly run and not subsidised. One firm has an anywhere except maybe the Salvation Army's almost entire monopoly on the outlets so can soup kitchen. do as they like, and have no obligation to run The restaurant tries to subsidise budgie as a student service. The students' Associa­ meals etc, but it has never been popular tion aims to get one of the outlets back, but enough to do this adequately. Says Stan, "It's this could be a while, considering that the last competition in town is far to great for it to ever time they ran a catering outfit the quality was perform well. If I was a student...the last place just as bad, and ended up going bust with $70, I'd want to go to have dinner would be the 000 in debt. (And on top of this, the cafe restaurant." He doesn't think it's popularity owners also refuse to play the campus radio can be improved, simply because of its station Radio Active in preference to ZMFM.) location —what it is and where it is is the pro­ blem. There's a possibility that this may be This is not a definitive investigation into the closed in the future. cafe question —I think only an objective and As for general opening hours, he likes to detailed analysis of catering income and ex­ avoid too much duplication simply to reduce penditure could justify that the system was costs. As he says, "When you're a service working to its full potential. Anyway, hopefuh business, which is what we're in, it's very ly this will give some perspectives and make hard to draw the line between profitability, or people aware of the problems involved. breaking even if you like, and service." Here are some options to think about: -The policy of luxury items subsidising necessary items could be furthered — e.g. sandwiches be reduced 20c in price while the COMPARATIVE PERSPECTIVE price of donuts be increased 20c. -AUSA could increase its income to subsidise catering. There is, however, limited scope for Now, time to see how other universities this: the more obvious sources of possible ex­ cope. tra income are by charging market rentals for our properties, by increasing prices in Canterbury University Shadows, or, by fees increases. Boy, these guys have got it good. If their This is where it is up to students to decide prices aren't cheap enough to begin with, they what they want, and exec should organise get cheaper - with your ID card you can get themselves to provide students with a 20% discount! choice.(i.e. a referendum whereby everyone This is what you'd pay with ID: Hot chips can vote either to have a fees increase and 80c, filled rolls 85c, sandwiches 50c each, get a list of additional benefits, or, to keep tea and coffee about 40c, pies 97c. fees at the current level with no change in stu­ As for variety and interesting food, for lunch dent services). you can get wontons, kebabs, and falafels on top of the usuals. Their chefs are even doing If you're interested in changing things, you special courses in vegetarian cooking! A varie­ have the right as members of AUSA —put let­ ty of meals are also available all day. And as ters in Craccum, hassle exec members to do for opening hours, they cater well for students something, or discuss the issues at SRC.

Thanks to Blair from Canta and Bernie from Salient for their help with information for this article. 10 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 198« TIE INDEPENDENT, fENATIVE MOVIE SCENE

At one stage in NZ movie history the 2 main movies he was thinking of showing. He all stimulate public interest. In fact a fair chains totally monopolised the industry, it was doesn't see the appearances of other art amount of goodwill exists in the specialised even illegal to start up opposition. In Auckland houses as a threat because he believes there's cinema scene. John Hart provided 'River's that all changed with the arrival of the 'plenty of room for Charley Gray and the Boys Edge' for the Bridgeway and the Capitol who Academy on the scene. at the Bridgeway'. Even though the first few embarked on a joint promotional venture. Pro­ years weren't good and the money could have bably it's the personal enjoyment motivation which allows this in a competitive The Academy - run by John and Heather been spent more profitably elsewhere, the per­ Hart sonal interest and enjoyment is what makes environment. Started: Dec 1982 it worthwhile. Position: Close to Tech and Uni. Central ci­ Finally just last year a third independent ty, next to the Public Library, close to the The next independent art movie house was specialized theatre arose. main chains. set up at the Capitol cinema. Movie Supply: Excellent The Bridgeway - run by Kelly Rogers Clientele: After work... milder movie. Charley Gray's - run by guess who? and Matthew Stevens. Younger Uni set, something more rated Started: January 1986 Started: Dec 1987 Position: Dominion Rd, semi-close to town, Position: Semi-close to the inner city, and After the battle to free up movie licencing Mt Eden, Kingsland, Grey Lynn etc. close to North Shore suburbs. opposed by the two chains, was won in the Movie supply: Improving but more is Movie supply: Improving but more is courts, the Academy in Auckland got under­ desired. desired. way. John Hart, from his experiences while Movie type and Clientele: Not 'Bridge Party Movie type and Clientele: Similar to the working with Kerridge Odeon, knew how and blue rinse set', people who are into last two but lacking the youth cinema essential position was, not just in the city but more modern gritty movie. goers. at the upper part (just take a look at the history of the Custom House). The place he has is close to both the student and work population John Hart believed Charley Grey came at the The 'boys at the Bridgeway' had the usual and if what's on in town at the chains doesn't right time (the Academy were thinking of beginning problems. Not having a reputation or contacts to secure the movie - but now appeal, the Academy's alternative is close by. opening another cinema). The timing was that's changing they're forming connections, Another factor John Hart has in his favour is good but other factors like location and film access to good recent release-movies because supply weren't ideal. The chains had their going overseas and getting into distribution. people aren't going to pay for something they distributors tied up, John Hart had developed It's much the same story as Charley Grey - can watch on TV or you'd turn off, if it was a network and some distributors didn't they are having to fight those already on television. This comes (as does the set-up want to risk their movies at a new, out of the established, not only in getting movies and customers but even in advertising where the capital) from his film distributing business to city cinema. . - chains who spend the large bucks get the best countries in the Pacific,. Even though the deal. chains have Paramount, Universal, Columbia, As an example of the problerr^ Charley Gray The Bridgeway is still developing its market, United Artists and Hoyts distribution tied up, used an analogy of a horse race to explain how they have linked in with a really young au­ there's still a lot of good products out there. the Film Festival works. The main distributors, dience as well as an older one, including senior A strange thing happened to his NZ distribution) who are merged with their cinemas put citizens to whom they offer half-price entry at side when he went independent, the main the movies in the Festival, if they do well they some sessions. However they lack the student chains wouldn't take his movies, another ex­ keep, if not, they might give Charley Grey or audience. Incentives to attract us people are ample of the chains' desire to continue their the Bridgeway the option. Something like run­ discounts for B-card holders and the soon to monopoly. ning a horse race, seeing who wins.then plac­ be installed stereo sound system. However, ing your bets. Independent cinemas are left to being on the North Shore they are not so much 'pick up the dregs' as Charlie Gray puts it. This wasn't the only problem he had in after this group, 80% of their clients are from Obviously things were tough at first. The this area,, establishing the film house. This enterprise Capitol doubled its turnover in the last six was venturing into new territory, establishing months but this went to paying off debts and a new market. After the initial surge in atten­ Charlie Gray is now a bachelor. However, the On the movie scene in general Kelly Rogers dance it took three years before business took Capitol seems to be well established now, hav­ (his partner was being rather silent) was off. The initial outlay was large as everything ing built up a good reputation. Distributors are similarly optimistic like John Hart and Charley had to be built, unlike the Capital and more willing to see the suburban cinema as Gray. He gave fairly similar reasons for the Bridgeway. Now the Academy probably has a good option. Movies like 'Cherry 2000' cinema interest increase talking about how the best sound and vision system in Auckland. which might have bombed at the main video had raised people's awareness and ap­ Then there was the problem of screening cinemas was a success because Aucklanders preciation and the overseas trend of more movies that would appeal. John Hart and his trust that a movie shown at Charley Gray's will cinemas was likely to continue in New wife take trips each year and view movies till be good. Also Charley Gray is moving into the Zealand. 'Return of the Killer Tomatoes' they're coming out of their ears. The knack is distribution side^ yvhich will guarantee a supply started last Friday and from the Festival the not to get overwhelmed by the culture around of titles. The films that will make it to the Bridgeway managed to get 'School Daze', 'The you but think how people back in little old NZ cinema seem to have a far more personal Family' and 'I've Heard the Mermaid Singing', will react. selection criteria, if Charlie Gray likes it he'll so keep your eyes out of their release if you put it on. didn't see them at the Fjlm Festival. As for the movie scene at present C.G. sees Moving forwards to the present day, John the boom as due to all the associated culture. Hart sees growth in the specialized scene as The existence of these three independent The various magazines you can read, the pro­ a worldwide phenomenon. The wealthy over motion aspect, maybe the more slightly hi- cinemas has definitely made the Auckland 40's clients are finding more time for brow image of movie theatres and that even movie scene a lot healthier and broad. In fact themselves now the kids have left and are with video competition the cinema does well their popular success can be seen in events looking for something more laid back and because seeing the 'big picture on the big like the creation of the Vogue by Pacer Ker­ challenging, and the younger customers he screen' is streets ahead and far more of an ridge and the larger number of Festival films believes are more curious wanting to learn and experience. that return for release by the chains. The alter­ expand and move beyond James Bond. native movie scene is becoming less and less John Hart is doing well. Due to extended alternative and exclusive in its type of seasons of 'M y Life as a Dog' and 'Les Charley Gray doesn't see other in­ customers which can only be a good thing for Fugitifs' he hasn't enough room for some dependents as competition, but instead they both movie makers and movie goers. Sean Hoobin

CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 11 mention an evening of intrigue! thanks to the clarity of presentation And, forsooth 'twere so, and while patrons can whilst revelling in the clear some aspects of the production disap­ rich timbre of Nat Lees' voice, look for­ pointed me the rest was great. The ward to watching Othello move from 'chamber' walls, appropriately bedeck­ courtly charm and words of love to ran­ ed in black and red sheets suitably ting insanity as he follows the tortured slashed and torn into a tangled web trail of lago (with friends like this who (reminiscent too perhaps of spattered needs enemies), who lies here, sug­ blood) by designer Alison Wall (Alison's gests there, abuses Othello's trust and Walls?), and the spartan stage area - an generally manipulates everyone around oblong with the audience on the long him in a thoroughly slimy despicable sides, a simple black altar affair against and credible manner (played by Mr one end wall (later placed centre stage Thompson) in order to destroy Othello's THEATRE for the climactic sacrifice) and a black happiness, sanity magazine/oil empire box on a low dais at the other end - etc. Forget the soaps, with characters PUMPHOUSE WINTER LIMBS HOLIDAY gave an air of Corporate's Macbeth (the like lago and Macbeth, Shakespeare inevitable comparison). The production out-back-stabs them all! (You didn't SHAKESPEARE—'THE WORKSHOP compromised this simple strong colour know he was Australian?) TEMPEST' theme, which saw Othello in black, My little brother and I could've done Desdemona in white and lago in red, by better sword fights with a couple of roll­ A workshop held from August allowing a bit of Venetian colour to ed up newspapers BUT ... what Othello August 10-20 22 —September 3 will have daily creep in on the secondary characters in his wrath does to Desdemona is un- Pumphouse, Takapuna classes for all ages to study contem­ (Though pale greens and pearls for categorically, completely and utterly, $15/$ 10 students porary, jazz, ballet and improvisation toady, envious, foppish Rodrigo and unexpedited, absolutely no holds bar­ techniques. Massage and anatomy will Elizabeth O'Connor produces one of strong blue for almost matron-like red, sickeningly and graphically real be an extra class available to adults, as Emilia did seem appropriate) but the domestic violence which culminates in Shakespeare's most imaginative and will a Dance in Education course for ritual element was very strong... Desdemona's life being snuffed out theatrical plays, here presented as a those interested in teaching dance. For First, we sat uncomfortably in an­ before your eyes with one swift futuristic fantasy. The use of special ef­ further information, phone 762-420. fects creates a sense of strangeness ticipation eyeing the other half of the stomach churning wrench of the neck! and forces beyond human control. Im­ audience in the cool blue almost ec­ (I swear I heard the bones crack!) aginative setting and costumes are clesiastic light for the 5 mins before the Desdemona and Emilia are played complemented with original music play began on Saturday. Then there with noticeable strength and presence composed by David Hamilton and will were the '4 corners' - dark cowled and by Belinda Weyworth and Maggie Max­ be sung by choral group Vive Voce, robed figures each bearing a candle on well respectively but don't expect any with synthesised, 'supernatural' a staff - who take the place in (you feminist plot changes. They still get sound. Bookings 499-818. guessed it) the corners for the 'dark' dead in the end thanks to violent males, 'THE MILAGRO BEAN- bits and finally Fiona Edgar's haunting blind (or who wish to remain blind) to FIELD WAR' music, which they chant along to, and the truth they maintain and, I guess, ART the altar/bed centre stage. One's im­ represent. This way of playing them (Amalgamated) agination can easily extrapolate this simply makes the obvious social(ickl) EXHIBITIONS small stage into a high mass (black or comment all the more starkly obvious Agh! Another actor turned director! white), a trial, a roman circus maybe, especially when the cat responsible, George Fraser Gallery Robert Redford, the face that launch­ a blood sacrifice, even a rugby game lago, in an almost anticlimax (a very (25a Princes St) ed a thousand swoons, directs but (four corner flags?) alienatory and Brechtian effect) is left thankfully doesn't act in this pleasant Because of the space created by the alive with a smug, triumphant sneer on 'Uncanny*Atopia*Fiction' is the ti­ little film. 'La Bamba' has obviously ig­ audience's 'witness' position, the au­ his face as though looking forward to tle of the 2nd Resene Paints Architec­ nited interest in (and opened a few dience entanglement is not as great as being tied to a rack and flogged (or ture Ex-Position, showing until wallets to) Hispanic-theme films, and I would have liked, though late comers something) as promised by The Duke September 9. it's a welcome interest. About time beware - 5 mins and you can expect ap­ (played with regal gravity by Ian America remembered one of its largest plause. Any later - bring a sword! One Watkins). Fisher Gallery subcultures. of the most off availed of wing(s) is the In all it was a very moving exciting (Reeves Rd, Pakuranga) The story, as a few people could foyer! You've been warned! and disturbing experience. If it sounds guess, is about a conflict over a bean- The play suffers the usual problem of like you it's on till Aug 20'. Starting on August 13 is 'Seven field in the small town of Milagro, New us plebs. Not speaking Elizabethian, but Rohan Stace Decades'—a retrospective exhibition of Mexico. Joe Mondragon suddenly Evelyn Page's work. This touring ex­ decides to plant a beanfield, using il­ hibition of over forty paintings was legally siphoned water, which has been undertaken by Christchurch's Robert somehow earmarked for a major McDougall Art Gallery. Page's work redevelopment. The development centres around vibrant and direct would have forced the mostly Hispanic responses to her environment and population to move out. Everything friends, especially landscapes, portraits snowballs, comically, until the final im­ and still-lifes. Until September 13. passe is reached. While it is a classic ruthless developer vs small, poor landowner, ANNEA LOCKWOOD - the real enjoyment lies in the EXPERIMENTAL MUSIC characters:- a pig, an angel, the gun- AND INTERMEDIA ARTS toting ancient Hispanics, the stone­ throwing grandmother, the down-to- earth sheriff. These are what makes Artspace this film, not pretty cinematography or Sun Aug 21, 8pm anything else. Redford has a decided­ ly deft touch, not of brilliance, but of Annea Lockwood is NZ's foremost humanity. The film is funny, sensitive pioneer avant garde composer, who w ithout being gushy, and balanced in worked in London and New York in the tone and presentation. All the dots join late 60's to the 70's, establishing up. Damn. herself as a key figure in these MB mediums. This year she is visiting New Zealand to present works in Well­ ington, Christchurch and Auckland. At Artspace she will make a sound in­ THEATRE stallation called 'The Hudson River Sound Map' and will present an even­ 'Othello' - The Chamber ing of sound performance works. Tragedy University Drama Studio FILM Until August 20

'TOUGH FILMS' You and I have by now been well A programme of seven rarely seen saturated with director Mervyn Thomp­ classic black and white films from the son's intention to create 'a witnessed NZ Federation of Film Societies will be ritual' using traverse staging to draw screening at Artspace during August the audience into the action so the feel­ and September. The August screenings ing is not 'Oh what an interesting will be at Artspace, Quay St, and those chapter of history' but one of 'There in September will be at The George but for the grace of god go I!' etc. Fraser Gallery, Princes St. A quick plot suss: Old friend lago, overeacting chronically to his jealousy August 11—Ugetsu Monogatari, of Othello's choice of lieutenant (Chat' Japan, 1952 tels?); sets about destroying Othello by 18 —The Seashell and the destroying his trust in Desdemona's Clergyman, 1928 fidelity etc. Ending in bloodshed. Okay? Meshes in the Afternoon, 1943 'Yeah groovy!' methinks and, with a 2 5 -T he End of St Petersburg, zounds, a gadzooks and a hey nonny 1927 nonny, there, with the grace of Crac- cum, went I to partake of an evening September 1|— Rome, Open City, Ita­ of good old Elizabethan prime time ly, 1945 'lust, jealousy, ritual and murder', 8-Earth, 1930 methinking the while that this auger'd 1 5 —The Eclipse, Italy, 1962 well for an intriguing evening not to

12 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 1988 ST O R M IE R OF THE ‘URBAN LEGEND’ INTERVIEW WITH JAN HAROLD BRUNVAND, AUTHOR OF TH E CHOKING DOBERMAN AND OTHER 'NEW' URBAN [LEGENDS BACKGROUND: Jan Brunvand is currently a Professor of English at the University of Utah and has worked for many years in the field of folklore. In 1981, he released 'The Vanishing Hitchhiker: American Urban Legends and their Meanings', which threw him into international recognition. What 'urban legends' are will be explained in the course of the following extracts from our conversation. Aidan-B. Howard

Legends and their Meanings'. The viewpoint; here you have the helpless 'W hat's it about?' I said 'Folklore... It's British reprint dropped the 'American'... woman going to a man for help, but all those stories that people tell that My information is deficient there are versions where the woman aren't true.' He asked if he could read still on minority groups, ethnic takes matters into her own hands and it. We got to the story about Little minorities especially and their lore - I asserts herself and affects her own Mikey and the^ Pop Rocks, a type of don't quite know even what black rescue without having to turn to a male cerial that pops and Little Mikey was American people have as legends... power-figure or something to help her. this boy who appeared on the commer­ An example: there are white, American I'm not demeaning scholarly writing... cial who never said anything. But the middle-of-the-road people that have it's just not as much fun. story went that Little Mikey had some legends about - they think they're true Pop Rocks and soda and exploded and stories - South-East-Asian immigrants '... I don't go out of my way to find horrific died. After telling this boy who had sat who steal people's cats and dogs and down beside me that Little Mikey legends... but the story has to have some cook them up and eat them; and you wasn't in fact dead, that it was an ac­ get this rash of stories about the eaten twist or angle for people to want to repeat tor who specialised in child parts... he pets and you get these ridiculous it...' said 'Well, how did he die?' There's just details about the social worker calling no answer! at a Vietnamese apartment... and they ABH: It's similar to Peter, Paul and What I enjoy is the see in the kitchen a pot on the stove Mary's 'Puff the Magic Dragon'. No response from real people who read the and all these cat-tails hanging over the matter how many times they deny that books and the columns, people who tell edge of the pot - you know, you don't it has anything to do with drugs, the and enjoy the stories and would like to cook a cat by putting... well, you don't story keeps going. cook anything that way. Well, what know more about them... ABH: The angle of my question was JHB: Yes. And like backward masking stories do the Vietnamese or Laotians more the fixation people have with hor­ on records and the 'Paul is dead' or Mong people have about the people rumour w ith all that stuff on 'Sergeant ror when in old or Classical legends they moved to live amongst? I don't Pepper's'. I'm always delighted to find there are incidences of positive stories ABH: I think most people may have know... The stories I get from other real-life incidences to illustrate these all the way up to legends like the 'Man­ heard of 'urban legend', but a lot don't countries - it's still solid western things. actually know what it means. For those culture...... Yesterday after­ nequin Pissant'. JHB: Yes, but even so, there's a lot of people, could you give us a nutshell ver­ noon another interviewer asked if I'd horror in classic folklore, like the sion of what it is? heard about the guy who comes into Grimms fairytales... I don't go out of my JHB:... The definition I like to use is this a Kentucky Fried Chicken with a dead '... telling a story is a way of resolving way to find horrific legends, nor reject - 'in a nutshell' is a good term, it's possum, puts it down on the counter something... A lot of sex jokes: people tell positive ones, but the story has to have almost proverbial: 'a true story that's and says something like 'And that's the jokes about a lot of things they just would too good to be true', that is, it's last one you'll get until you've paid for some tw ist or angle for people to want to repeat it; it has to have some point. transm itted as a true story, as the others I've been bringing you.'... We not do or discuss...' Of course, you could study as a form something that really happened, but it's have possums in the States, but it's a of folklore any story people tell and how really too good to be true; it's really too different beast, but we have the Ken­ they tell it. Most people can tell you a ironic or ... bizarre or ... too much tucky Fried Rat story where the fried story about losing their luggage... or the perfect poetic justice in it to really be chicken piece has a rat's tail hanging ABH: Do you think with all the stories worst mix-up with a credit-card or 'how true - and in fact it's a piece of folklore, out of it and it turns out to be rat, not that you've got that people are keen to I met my wife' or the family name - it's just one variation of a cycle of chicken; and we have the MacDonald's find ancedotal solutions to these little where does it come from? These are stories going around. You could call rumour that MacDonald's burgers have episodes in their lives? becoming folklore by being retold. them 'modern fables' or something like worm-meat in them; so, this is im- JHB: Well, telling a story is a way of that. By 'legend' what I mean is These [stories in the book] don't really resolving something. Telling a joke is, 'believable or told as true as opposed have any connection w ith anything the for example. A lot of sex jokes: people to jokes' and some people call them '... the guy who comes into a Kentucky Fried teller has personally experienced - it's tell jokes about a lot of things they just always the friend-of-a-friend or they 'myths', implying the lack of truth in Chicken with a dead possum, puts it down would not do or discuss, but they know just think that it happened. These have a joke about it - masturbation, or in­ them; but I think 'myth' fits better the on the counter and says something like 'And vast cosmological themes of Classical more structure and are more pointed fidelity, or A.I.D.S. or venereal disease. Myth... or native myths of people like that's the last one you'll get until you've that the 'how I met my wife' story, or So, I think people get some sort of the North American Indians. I prefer to paid for the others I've been bringing you...' sometimes they leave it dangling - you satisfaction out of having an illustrative call them 'legends', comparing them to never really find out what happens in story, whether ygu call it.an anecdote the end. or a joke or a legqfid or a myth, that other kinds of historical stories - mediately recognisable as a story that ABH: It's reminiscent of the gag-show shows you how things are and what legends about how a town got its casts suspicion on fast food. ... I got a or the stand-up comedian. they mean; and at the same time, it's name, or a famous outlaw and what he long way from your question: I ought JHB: In many ways it is. A good exam­ always entertaining in some way. Even did. You see, these are modern or 'ur­ to cast a wider net for things that I col­ ple of that is the Elevator Incident story: if it's a horrible story, it's satisfying to ban' legends; they're legends that deal lect, or colligate foreign students on the black man gets in the elevator with get to the end o f that story and see with modern appliances like microwave Campus. The study of modern folklore a dog with the women who are provin­ how it worked out and what happened ovens, or modern travel like on motor­ accepts the idea that you can have cial, naive in some way and he says to those people. That example I have in ways and vacations and with travel- folklore in the present and that modern 'Sit!' in a firm voice and the women sit the book from Romania, where, sup­ trailers and so on. So, that's the defini­ people exchange stories that we could down. When that got used in a televi­ posedly, young men are going around tion I like - 'a true story that's too good call 'folk-stories'. That's not a very ac­ sion sitcom, the Bob Newhart pro­ from apartment to apartment saying to be true.' cepted idea, except in North America, gramme, they had a black guest-star that they're the city air inspectors and especially, and somewhat in Scan­ '... these are modern or 'urban' legends; with a white dog, 'W hitey' and he says they need to have a clean bottle... from dinavia and England, a little bit of the 'Sit, Whitey!' and so the script-writer each apartment... and so the people they're legends that deal with modern rest of Europe. •. had got the extra laugh in. When you supply a bottle and they swish it around appliances like microwave ovens or ... I'm sure that in any coun­ say 'stand-up comic', it brings up through the air and this will be taken modern t r a v e l..______try there are items of narrative that go another notion: if somebody tells a joke, back and they will analyse the air... It's around - belief, rumour, gossip, you expect them to be a good very plausible... but it isn't true to begin ABH: That's very quotable! whatever you want to call it - that take storyteller... but these legends people with... It's a way of saying something JHB: ... I' ve become a stereotypical in­ different variations and get structured think of as requiring no performance about the Government: 'They're check­ terviewee after a while... you've heard in certain ways... But I have to say that skills; they don't memorise it, don't lead ing everything...' But nobody I talked to all the questions already and so you most of the things I am studying are the up to a punch-line, because they think knew anyone who had this happen... fool around with the answers... One of middle-class, white, mainstream culture it actually happened and they're just It's interesting some of the things peoi- the things I sometimes say is 'The truth kind of people that are circulating. telling you about it. So, they don't see ple will act on: the well-known atheist, never stands in the way of a good story,' ABH: In your quest for new material do themselves in the spotlight, even Madeline Marie O'Hara, brought the that is, people will continue to pass you focus on getting any positive though they are - and other people will case that lead to the Supreme Court's these things on whether I debunk them legends? I notice that a lot of them are join in: 'The way I heard it, it was a prayer-in-school decision - one of the or not or whether they think about quite horrific... chihuahua.' BIG Supreme Court decisions in the them and realise that 'that can't be JHB: Well, it's not my fault, I don't write States. There is a story that's com­ true' - the hook story that's unlikely them. It's got to the point where I don't pletely untrue that she has a petition that ever happened, but the truth - have to go out collecting; they just pour ... similar to Peter, Paul and Mary's 'Puff the before the Federal Communications that that is not the truth - doesn't pre­ in all the time I get calls from journalists Magic Dragon'. No matter how many times Commission to have all religious broad­ vent people from passing it on. at home (I usually don't even return casting in the States banned and that they deny that it has anything to do with ABH: When you talk about different calls unless it says 'Johnny Carson'), the only way god-fearing people can groups having their own particular but they flow in on me from all direc­ drugs, the story keeps going. stop this happening is to send letters types of legends... what sort of tions: readers of the books, readers of to the F.C.C....There ls No Such Peti­ responses do you have from groups the columns, students in my classes tion! But it's on posters and the like: that are particularly foreign - like most collect them and other folklorists, There was the incident in the 'Petition 446, please put on the of the examples are from the United especially American, are doing research book about Little Mikey and the Pop eveiope'. The F.C.C. just throws away States, even if it's from, say, the on these legends - they publish dry, Rocks. I was flying to New York and this any envelopes that have that number American Indians? analytical, scholarly articles, out of little boy sat down next to me and he on the outside. How much is the Post JHB: A good question; that's one that which I pluck the good stories and I try noticed I had a copy of The Vanishing Office making on postage?! isn't asked very often. As a matter of to find good passages to quote; like the Hitchhiker in my briefcase and he said a fact, the first book had a subtitle with hairy armed hitchhiker, where you get 'Where are you going?'... I said 'To New That's one extreme to which people 'American' in it: 'American Urban people looking at it from, say, a feminist York to sell my book' and he said will enact on a 'legend'! CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 13 W i n t e r G e n e r a l M e e t i n g

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★ !! TO D AY!!

T u e s d a y August 9 , lpm Reereation Centre

If the meeting fails to achieve a quorum or to complete the business before it on August 9, the meeting will commence or continue in the Recreation Centre at lpm on Wednesday, 10 August (i.e. tomorrow).

CHAIR THAT, in light of the Budget cuts made by Executive, the AUSA now recom­ mend that the AUSA fee be seventy-five dollars ($75).’ A g e n d a Rule 8(ii) McDOUGALL/ p r e s e n t THAT Rule 8(ii) of the Constitution be amended by replacing the words ‘eigh­ teen dollars ($18)’ with ‘twenty-four dollars ($24)’ APOLOGIES Note: Executive recommends the following : CHAIR MINUTES OF PREVIOUS THAT the Building Levy be set at twenty-four dollars ($24). MEETING THE FOLLOWING MOTIONS FOR THAT the Minutes of a Specfal General Meeting of the AUSA held on 21 March 1988 be taken as read AND THAT they be adopted as a true and CONSTITUTIONAL AMEND­ correct record. THAT the Minutes of the Autumn General Meeting of the AUSA held on MENT ARE MOVED 22 March 1988 be taken as read AND THAT they be adopted as a true and correct record. M cD O U G A LL/ THAT the Minutes of a Special General Meeting of the AUSA held on Rule 39 8 June 1988 be taken as read AND THAT they be adopted as a true and cor­ THAT Rule 39 be amended to read - rect record. ‘(i) A Special Meeting of the SRC may be demanded by resolution of the SRC. THAT the Minutes of a Special General Meeting of the AUSA held on 16 June 1988 be taken as read AND THAT they be adopted as a true and ‘Subject to Rule 38 of these Rules, upon receipt by the SRC Chairperson of correct record. the Executive Resolution or notice in writing as the case may be, the SRC Chairperson (or if she/he fails promptly to do so, the Executive) shall fix the date, time and place for the special meeting, which shall be no later than ANNUAL ACCOUNTS five days after the passing of the Executive Resolution or the giving of notice THAT the Annual Balance Sheet and the Statement of Accounts for the in writing as the case may be. The special meeting shall in any event be held year ended 31 December 1987 be received AND THAT they be adopted. on a day on which lectures are scheduled for all Faculties.’ ‘(ii) The notice convening any special meeting of the SRC shall specify the APPOINTMENT OF HONORARY nature of the business intended to be transacted thereat in any manner suffi­ cient to give reasonable notice of the purpose thereof, and although the words SOLICITOR of any proposed resolution shall be given in any such notice, any amendment The Executive will bring recommendations on the matter. thereof or any other motion dealing with the same matter shall be in order. Except as provided in this clause, no business other than that specified in DECLARATION AS TO THE the notice convening the meeting may be transacted by a special meeting of the SRC.’ ELECTION OF THE 1989 5) Rule 63(1) EXECUTIVE THAT Rule 63(i) be amended by the addition of the words - ‘The Honorary Solicitor shall approve only such alterations or additions CONSTITUTIONAL as appear to him/her to be free from ambiguity and to be not inconsistent with the other Rules and Schedules. Any alterations or additions not approved AMENDMENTS by the Honorary Solicitor shall not be registered but shall be referred back Rule 8(i) to the Association in General Meeting for reconsideration in the light of the CHAIR Honorary Solicitor’s comments thereon.’ THAT Rule 8(i) of the Constitution be amended by deleting the words - “In the case of a member who is also a member of the Auckland University 6) Eighth Schedule, Par II, Rule 2(i)(c) Medical Students’ Association and who is enrolled in Year 2 or 3 of the B.H.B. THAT the Eighth Schedule, Part II, Rule 2(i)(c) be amended by replacing course or in Year 1 or 2 of the M.B.Ch.B. course the subscription shall be the words ‘five (5) years’ with ‘three (3) years’. thirty dollars ($30) less than the figure before mentioned, and provided fur­ ther that”. 7) Rule 20(ii) THAT Rule 20(ii) of the Constitution be amended by the addition of the Rule 8 words ‘an Academic Officer,’ after the words ‘a Treasurer’. CHAIR THAT Rule 8 of the Constitution be amended by deleting Clause (iv). 8) Rule 36 Rule 8(iv) reads as follows : THAT Rule 36 of the Constitution be amended by adding a New Clause, “Having collected the subscription fees of members of AUES pursuant to (xiv), to read - clause (i) hereof, the Association shall pay to AUES fifty percent (50%) of ‘(xiv) The Academic Officer shall be responsible for liaison with the University.’ these fees in respect of all persons who being members of the Association are also ordinary or life members of AUES. For this purpose the Secretary 9 ) Throughout the Constitution of AUES shall supply to the Association a schedule of such members during THAT the Constitution be amended by replacing all occurrences of ‘Ad­ the first term and the Association shall pay to AUES the sum owing by vir­ ministrative Vice President’ and ‘Education Vice President’ with ‘Vice- tue of the provisions of this Rule within seven days of receiving from the President’ and ‘Education Officer’, respectively. University the subscription fees paid to it.’ 10) Rules 20(ii) and 36(x) Rule 8(i) THAT Rule 20(ii) of the Constitution be amended by deleting the words McDOUGALL ‘an Environmental Affairs Officer’ AND THAT Rule 36(x) be rescinded. THAT Rule 8(i) of the Constitution be amended by replacing the words ‘six­ ty dollars ($60)’ with ‘eighty-eight dollars ($88)’. 11) Rules 20(ii) and 36(vii) THAT Rule 20(ii) of the Constitution be amended by deleting the words Note: Executive recommends the following:,,* ‘a National Affairs Officer’ AND THAT Rule 36(vii) be rescinded.

14 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 1988 12) Rules 20(ii), 36(v) and Thirteenth Schedule . ‘2. The Committee shall consist of - a) the President, who shall be Chairperson, THAT Rule 20(H) of the Constitution be amended by deleting the words b) the Accountant, ‘an International Affairs Officer’ AND THAT Rule 36(v) be rescinded AND c) the Secretary, who shall be Secretary to the Committee, FURTHER THAT the Thirteenth Schedule be rescinded. d) the Union Manager, and 13) Rule 42 e) three (3) students, who shall have been members of the Executive for at THAT Rule 42 of the Constitution be amended by adding a New Clause, least six (6) months, to be appointed by the Executive. (vii), to read - ‘3. a) The term of office of every member of the Committee who is a member ‘(vii) The SRC may create and remove at any time SRC positions to deal with pursuant to Rules 2.a, b, c and d of this Schedule shall be the term of his/her political issues of interest to Members.’ employment by the Association. b) The term of office of every member of the Committee appointed pursuant 14) Rule 2(a) to Rule 2.e of this Schedule shall be two (2) years from the date of his/her THAT Rule 2(a) of the Constitution be amended by insertion of the words appointment, PROVIDED THAT any member so appointed shall cease to ‘Policy’ shall mean resolutions carried by Referendum or General Meeting be a member of the Committee upon his/her failing to attend any three (3) or Executive.’ consecutive meeting of the Committee to which he/she has been duly summoned. 15) Rule 3 ‘4. Notice of every meeting of the Committee shall be in writing and shall THAT Rule 3 of the Constitution be amended by adding a New Clause, be given to every member of the Committee at least seven (7) days before (xix), to read - the date of each meeting for which such notice is required by these Rules. ‘(xix) To implement policy in such manner and such extent as Executive may ‘5. The quorum for all meetings of the Committee shall be five (5). deem fit.’ ‘6. Subject to the provisions of Rule 4 of this Schedule, the Committee shall meet at such date, time and place as many be determined by the Chairper­ 16) Rule 3(xi) son, the Secretary upon receiving a written request signed by two (2) members THAT Rule 3(xi) of the Constitution be amended by the insertion of the of the Committee, or the Executive. words ‘and any other bodies as Executive may deem fit’ after the words ‘af­ ‘7. (i) A Two-thirds’ majority of those present and entitled to vote shall be filiated Bodies’. required for the passing of any resolution by this Committee. Note: The phrase, ‘affiliated Bodies; refers to its first occurrence in Rule 3(xi). (ii) All resolutions of this Committee which are adopted by the Executive shall be binding upon the Executive and all Committees and members of the 17) Rules 8(i) and 8(ii) Association." THAT Rule 8 of the Constitution be amended by - (iii) The Executive shall not, except by the unanimous decision of those pre­ a) deleting from Clause (i) the words ‘AND PROVIDED FURTHER THAT sent and entitled to vote, rescind its adoption of any resolution of this Com­ in the case of a member who at the date of enrolling has enrolled for that mittee, unless directed to do so by a General Meeting of the Association.’ year and intends to attend full-time at the Auckland Technical Institute but only part-time at the Auckland University the subscription for such year shall END OF PROPOSED FIFTEENTH SCHEDULE be ten dollars ($10) for each paper for which such member so enrols at the University’; and 19) Rule 7 b) deleting from Clause (ii) the words ‘PROVIDED further that in the case THAT Rule 7 of the Constitution be amended by replacing Clause (i) with - of a member who at the date of enrolling has enrolled for that year and in­ tends to study full-time at the Auckland Technical Institute but only part- (i) Life Members shall be such persons (whether previously members or not) time at the Auckland University such further sum for each for each year shall as the Executive may, with the consent of such persons, by resolution elect be $2 for each paper for which such member so enrols at the University’. as Life Members. 18) NEW Fifteenth Schedule GENERAL BUSINESS THAT the Constitution be amended by inserting the following NEW Fif­ CHAIR teenth Schedule, to read as follows : THAT the CRACCUM Editor be requested to make a request to the Winter FIFTEENTH SCHEDULE General Meeting as to the level of subsidy required for 1989. ‘1. The Future Planning Committee (hereinafter called ‘the Committee’) is CHAIR hereby given the following powers and duties : THAT tenants of AUSA properties pay eighty percent (80%) of market To discuss and make recommendations to the Executive on the medium - and rental value as of 1 February, 1989. long-term aims of the Association, future trends, insofar as they affect the Association, and strategic planning for the purpose of achieving the medium McDOUGALL - and long-term aims of the Association. THAT this General Meeting recommend that the Executive elect, as per Rule 7(i)(b) of the Constitution, Judy Anaru as a Life Member of the Association. END OF BUSINESS

OTHER INCOME 15919 41966 (29797) ted subtract the loss neda la tbs year (11602> 1987 1988 1989

604625 ■sans your Association is now worth 71371« 70126 Bookshop Commission 77080 81620 10247 Tapped Bear 15880 11080 ' How such has boon sat asida for spacial usas (7769) I n t e r e s t ( 15880) (15000) 1987 3868 O ther 6300 6300 31011 Athletic 6 Cultural Trust 34021 (1730) Thaatra Activities Fund (261) 76472 83300 83920 19921 Thaatra Equipment Raplacaaant Fund (3989) (5086) Shadows Equipaant Fund (28) 9605 Othar Funds 14945 Tha University Bookshop pays AUSA a commission in recognition of tha marketing assistance provided to thaa. This sua has bean aar-aarked for tha following 53721 44668 a r e a s . ------MOOT THAT « I 001 FOR MOBS THAI A YEAR 1987 1988 Accounts 163689 Housing Corporation Mortgaga 161395 100633 T0 ra Loans (Sacursd) 56033 26075 Social Activities Officer 26264 19790 Disabled Students Resource Officer 24260 264322 217428 10390 Joi) Crises Centre 9530 Hsra sra tha 1987 annual accgunts in tba left-hand column, tha 1988 budgat In MOHR 0E HAVE TO PAT BACK 11 IEXT 12 MOMTHB 15313 Part-Time Employment Bureau 15456 tha first right-hand coluan. and tha draft 1989 budgat in tha far right-hand — Student Parent Resource Officer 5116 coluan. Figures in () ara opposite in sign froa othar figures in tha sane 238821 Bank of Maw Zealand (Secured) 280207 71568 co lu a n . 54218 Sundry Creditors & Accruals 52780 80626 223832 Trade Creditors 175297 AUSA RENTAL PROPERTIES 27772 To save printing costs, and oaks tha accounts easier to understand, only 58 Inland Revenue (P.A.Y. B) 123643 figures over 810.000 have bean included. Full copies of tha audited annual 50993 P ro v is io n s 1987 1988 1989 accounts can be exaained at tha Students Association Office. A liaitad number 6482 C lubs 6 S o c ie tie s 4905 INCOME of copies will be available. 13779 Receipts in Advance 16912 205432 Market Rental 207983 220462 25357 Q.8 .T. Payable 8124 72055 lass subsidy to tenants 79260 82745 OVERALL SUMMARY OF WHERE THE HOMEY CONES AND G0B8 Artwork Trust 2560 133377 Rentals Paid 128723 137717 692202 1987 1988 1989 613532 INCOMB LESS EXPENSES 1668014 771970 Your Student Fees 801690 190?b90) 36775 Repairs and Maintenance 43000 45580 0 less Engineering Society Subsidy (37500) (42500) 11618 Depreciation 14000 14008 76472 Othsr Incooe 83300 83920 13850 I n te r e s t 25000 25000 45249 Surplus on AUSA Rental Properties 18003 22694 13278 O ther 15720 16663 34136 Surplus froa 8hadows Student Club 30447 30584 110720 115023 8397 Catering Surplus ( 14088) 0 88128 18003 22694 914534 860162 1076698 45249 Total Surplus

BXPBHDITURE 1986 1987 0 THINGS WE OWN FOR A LONG TIMB 6 156889 Accounts and Data Processing 125650 117299 SHADOW 180999 Adainlstration 188524 199069 55584 Land 55504 1445 Investigation into 1982 a/c's 6000 6360 251888 B u ild in g s 235111 1987 1988 1989 503003 Student Activities 494341 540826 469384 Plant Equip. Furniture & Fitt 580845 INCOME 95488 Student Union Facilities 117685 1243.2 98785 Caepua Radio FM Station 89723 186361 l o t B a le . 225880 230500 LHB8 EXPENSES 938624 932200 987856 867393 811183 UM Adainletret ion 18880 19880 ======INVESTMENTS (WHAT THEY COST OS) 38444 Entertainment 48888 42480 79243 Wages and S a la r ie s 85808 98950 914534 Total Incoae 860162 1076698 15888 Shares: Univarsity Bookshop 15000 9429 Repairs and Maintenance 12080 1372« (938624) less Total Expenditure (932200) (987856) Shares Flatcher Challenge Ltd 1153 «542 S e c u rity 18080 18688 153882 Add Non-Cash Expenses 153882 153882 585 Shares: Briarlay Investeanta 585 6647 Depreciation 10888 20800 47369 Add S a le of NZUSA House 0 100 Student Travel Services (IZ) 100 9928 O ther (46894) Less loan repayments (75394) 11553 12246 (47594) 11488 . Loans to A ffiliated Clubs 8434 34136 Total Surplus 38447 38584 130267 Cash available for capital purchases 6450 195130 27893 25272 50378 Contributions froa Trusts 54000 57240 " ======" ======less Itees Purchased HOBBY IN BANK EQUAL TO WHAT IS SET ASIDE FOR USB CATERING - OVERALL SUMMARY 18259 Student Activities 11500 7600 3 1ft 1d Athletic and Cultural Trust 34021 sssssss:5SSSSSXXCSSSS3SSS3S3 4350 Student Union Building 21000 60000 5085 Accounts Department 5300 1987 1988 18700 SHORT TBRM INVESTMENTS 5601 Shadows 42860 83000 (17073) Bakery 25655 C a te rin g 37500 14000 (15142) 5888 BNZ Finance Ltd 88494 C o ffee Bar 83644 54944 Adainlstration 0 0 17743 National Bank 5188 Coffee Lounge 5417 6453 466751 Change in cash position 57710 69070 ■oglnaaring School 2578 22743 37752 Hunan Science Building Cafeteria 36030 (89092) Nolo Cafeteria, Mloc.1 l.naoua, etc (56480) WHAT SHOULD BECOME CASH IN 12 1KWTHB 3741 Medical School 5568 14452 M ilk Bar 28460 1986 « i f f TOO* ASSOCIATION O'MB 9515 Cash on Hand 4250 18594 B e e ta u ra n t 6937 197 National Bank of NZ Ltd Loom Ebponem dm to 548821 Whet you bed a t th e s t a r t o f th e y ear 222884 Ho. ouch mo owed to no 412045 81713 Adolnletrat ion 81600 PI we (28888) But soea of thee won't pay up (20000) (22559) Central Storm 8 Von. 6 A ccount. (23728) 18102 Budget Meal 8 ub eid y 28888 Thivgo a. bought . 1th Booty (to o .. What wa ex p e c t we can c o lle c t 392845 13636 Club function administration 15888 62395 Bfooiol fu l 59391 69479 The ooet of food, etc m haven' t so ld y et 62926 22727 Cltfln purchasing good, at coata 25888 17589 Thoatro Ifaljnaat Boplonopopt Fad 43362 Incoa. Rvc.lv.bl. 7196 1263« Cluho hiring room for fro. 15888 Bhodom Btaiont Club hguipeent r« d 12353 1888 8351 Dapartaant of Labour 8783 Aod ooooj no aada «ban to told tklnga 43880 Payment* In Advance 50828 (67126) Loss on student outlets (43768) And o u r o h o » o f th o o o lo o f K O U 'o houoo 47888 209493 Money due t o pey fo r c a fe a l t e r a t i o n s 209493 75523 Add M on-Student F u n c tio n s 29688 92337 Mlaue 587161 727538 6397 Overall Catering Result (14888) (3688) Thlago thot belonged la loot yoar'o aooounto 6899 536208 1668814 19287 ■ o n e, « 0 go» to tho leldoent to boy thlnge 28681 It is too early to prepare a catering budgat for 1989. 0a aia for a ctering The Meldaant profit, «hioh to glut hook 15288 result of 0. This is strongly affected by tba level of non-student functions.

CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 15 STUDENT ACTIVITIES

1988 1989 ARTS Orientation 1000 0 Cultural Projects 2000 2120 ACCOUNTS AND DATA PROCESSING ‘STUDENT UNION BUILDING 1500 Theatre A ctivities Donation 3008 3000 12314 NZSAC Membership Levies 13840 15300 1988 1989 1987 1988 1989 26075 Social Activities Officer 26264 27102 21650 Maidment T h eatre 27800 29746 43564 A udit Pees 25000 25000 76856 C leaning 77000 81620 CAPPING 19277 Rages - Casual 2000 2000 40160 Light, Heat and Power 50000 53000 4470 Capping events 3965 4203 130239 Rages - General 145000 155150 13438 Repairs and Maintenance 20700 21942 2798 Capping Revue 0 0 24134 Computer Depreciation 17000 17000 11562 Rubbish Collection 12700 13462 (4579) Graduate Ball < 1500) 0 10823 Maintenance ChargeB 10500 11130 10256 S e c u rity 12000 12720 CLUBS 9595 S ta tio n e ry 11000 11660 12044 Toilet Supplies 12500 13250 28361 Accounting Services for clubs 30000 32000 35257 O ther 34150 21359 78611 Rages and Salaries - Custodians 78000 83460 (22558) Grants not collected by clubs (33000) (39000) 8190 Depreciation 20400 20400 76726 Grants to clubs 65000 80000 272889 247650 246299 8732 Batar Rataa 10500 11130 DONATIONS less Charges to Other Departi 3788 O ther 2635 2793 0 Disabled Students Trust 2180 1365

12000 ■ Shadows 18000 19000 263638 296435 313777 0 Student Memorial Scholarship 1500 0 74000 C a te rin g 74000 78000 168150 less University Contribution 178750 189475 0 Speakers Fund Contribution 2000 2000 27273 Club accounts 30000 32000 EXECUTIVE 95488 117685 124302 10710 Portfolio Expenses 11000 11660 113273 122000 129000 MEDIA 39721 Campus R adio Levy 46332 40950 159616 Overall Accounts Department 125650 117299 ADMINISTRATION 39614 Craccum 41308 43786 2798 Orientation Handbook 5000 5300 1987 1988 1989 2488 The Other Calendar, Etc 5000 5300 INVESTIGATION INTO 1982 ACCOUNTS 7230 Publication Grants 6000 6360 (7518) Photocopier (5712) (5500) OTHER 1987 15748 T y p e s e tte r 13197 15000 0 Quad Forums 300 318 22874 H on o raria 26010 27571 2133 August Councils of NZUSA 1000 2500 1445 Legal expenses 109321 Rages - Administration 116163 124316 2056 Child care for Executive Members 996 2000 10571 Telephone Rentals 5800 6148 6873 Delegate Travel 3000 5000 MAIDMBNT THEATRE New policy - spread cost of PABX among th e u s e rs 17809 Executive Projects 3000 3180 5406 Depreciation 1600 1600 4160 Blection Expenses 2500 2650 1987 1988 1989 5297 Legal Expenses 3996 4236 618 General Meetings 500 530 INCOME 4137 Parental Leave Provision 4000 4000 3831 May C ouncil of NZUSA 2000 2500 51201 External Hireage 45000 47700 1764 Repromaster 2036 2 158 90165 NZUSA L evies 70435 77805 13041 Concession Hire 18000 19080 196 S tu d e n t Van ( 1904) (2018) 1607 SRC Policy Action Fund 1600 1696 11892 Other Income 10000 10600 4373 Executive Expenses 6000 6360 0 School V isits 700 742 18897 University Contribution 36400 38948 1059 General Expenses 1602 1698 185 Entertainment Fund 396 420 17076 AUSA C ontribution 27800 29746 569 In su ra n c e 660 700 0 Romen S tu d en t R e search ers 23298 0 2443 Membership Bxpenses 2800 2968 SERVICES 116681 < 34) Photocopying 120 127 137200 146074 Employment Bureau 13570 14384 le s s BXPBNSBS 474 P o stag e 1848 1959 Second-Hand Bookstall (8000) (8000) 11668 744 D e p re c la t ion 15000 18000 0 P r in tin g 702 SPORTS 9427 Light, Heat and Power 11500 12190 195 Repairs and Maintenance 402 426 584 Blues Dinner 700 742 49706 Rages 79600 85172 246 Staff Procurement 1500 1590 2007 Baster Tournament 4000 0 28881 O ther 1580 S ta tio n e r y 1500 1590 31100 30712 Rinter Tournament 2000 6000 166 T o ll C a lls 204 216 NZUSU Membership Levies 43251 45045 99682 2132 Resource Officer 2200 2332 137200 146074 28855 Sports Grants 22000 30740 WELFARE 16999 180999 185524 199069 Surplus Retained by Theatre 19790 Disabled Students Resource Officer 24260 25958 Job Crises Centre 9530 0 Establishment of Welfare Trust 0 40000 Needy Students Fund 2000 2000 Student Parent Resource Officer 5116 5474 University Creche Subsidy 7500 7950

4^4341 S + 0 8 Z6

capitalist/employers how much STUNNED their next/last gig. The really sad they pay the average workers, thing about S.M .'s being "almost engineer, etc. The per capital Gross strangers in their own environ­ National Product for Malaysia re­ Dear Mr Price ment" is that they're not alone. I mains low (US$1635 in 1986) as RE: Spanish Fly/Stunned Mullets look forward to reading your col­ compared to New Zealand I will concede on re-reading the ar­ umn. US$6510 in 1986. ticle that it does look a bit like an Yours sincerely, WRONG TACTS' 4) '...300 private students or so ad (though it shows a singular lack Rohan Stace Dear Editor, come from that country... every of superlatives). This was not in­ (Once a shy black frog) tentional (Thanks Ed.)—the idea The letter by S.A. in last weeks year.' : Wrong again! The quota of DAMSEL IN DISTRESS Craccum which was intended to Overseas Students set by New was that seeing they'd been To all Knight Errants, set some facts (on the current cam­ Zealand Government for every around a while it might be a good Poet - are you saying men are in­ paign by the Overseas Students member countries of ASEAN is 180 idea to give readers some capable of being macho and not community to oppose the introduc­ per year. background. I stand by my asser­ tion of User-pays) right had in fact S.A.'s charge of us as being the tion that they are a good COVERS raping women ! I disagree sir! - as would, it seems, Chief Judge Boz, had got it all wrong. Many of the 'exploiter' who '.. has contributed BAND. so-called sexist-pig and the Scarlet facts pointed out by his/her letter to the uneven distribution of wealth Your 'valid' criticism is based Manuka. If such crusaders seek are simply NOT correct. Some ex­ in that country...' and '.. it is a upon one tiny portion of the article this damsel in distress I can be amples : shame that this country should and all I can say to you is lighten found most of the night at 1) 'There are 6 million Chinese in shoulder these well to do's at the up before you turn into your own Malaysia...' : The often upper limit expense of... not so fortunate Kiwi grandma! You could also try being Shadows - on the 12. 8.88 especially - but remember, first figure used is 5 million or so, a 20% kid in this over crowded academic more factual like your fellow Eng. come, first chance and the line deviation is very misleading. environment...' only demonstrated Bry (Build A Bridge) B.E (Craccum forms on my right. 2) '92% of Chinese live in cities or his shabby style of dialectic 2 .8 .8 8 ). townships..': That is a pretty rosy diatribe, nothing much. If S.A. is ge­ I would not be at all surprised to Yours with baited breath, Scarlett O'Hara 'urban and sub-urban' picture nuine in his/her concern of the well find Stunned Mullets have receiv­ painted by S.A. which we humbly being and welfare of our rural folks ed no coverage—there probably P.S. Suitors - you have the best can not afford. As a matter of fact, in our country, then s/he should weren't any VOLUNTEERS chance if you come bearing gifts of majority of Malaysia Chinese (i.e. 3 know that by offering education available at the time (Craccum's ad Jellybeans (alcoholic variety). millions or so) still live in those (under the present fees structure) 37.5.88) You say you are a FETID SCUM 'New Village', the remnants of will be one of the best ways to "regular ... at Shadows, "have Dear Craccum, British Colony. Because of con­ combat the deplorable poverty level seen just about every band that Re Greek Gods: Bullshit. I've spent tinued negligence by those who in Malaysia. Why? Because admit­ Shadows have provided" and you many a tiresome year with this fetid hold wealth and power in Malaysia, tedly we can learn a great deal from obviously care about the varsity scum, and so I feel the need to the poverty level in these 'New New Zealand, where the positive music scene so, taking Aidan-B. warn you of his blatant disregard Villages' are still very high. role of Government of a modern Howard's initiative I say please, for even the most basic of hygiene 3) '... 75% of Chinese., has an democratic state to ensure social you sound like the perfect person standards. His putrid, urine soaked average annual income of justice (like maintaining a minimum to offer a regular Shadows live col­ great coat has tained the once il­ MYR18000 ($NZ12000) or more...': wage for all workers), safe guide of umn. If you have already, good on lustrious image of the LCR. May he If this is true, then that will be very people's welfare and human rights, ya and welcome aboard (though rot forever in the devils rectum, be nice, thank you. However, this claim great record of environmental con­ that wrong phone number sounds castrated with a blunt gardening in­ has only shown the total ignorance servation, etc. will be a shining ex­ a bit suspicious—prove me wrong!) strument, or be forced to listen to and lack of local knowledge of S.A. ample for our country. As my plans to see Stunned an entire 'Aha' album. I wonder during S.A.'s travel in that W.H. Chong Mullets have thus far been Yours in Warning, part of the world, did S.A. ever ask P.S. Wonder what S.A. does stand thwarted by that despicable despot Freddy Frobiter, the flatulent those 'generous' local and foreign for, South African? A racist? work, I appreciate your advise of hermit of Lyndersfarm.

Tues 9th W e d 10th T h u r 11th Fri 12th H a p p y rs 6 - 7 p AO MAHANA 7PM Anything Left 7PM jack Kaka 8PM Band

16 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 1988 The Fairly Easy The Slightly Crossword Harder Crossword

X-WORDS

ACROSS DOWN ACROSS DOWN 1. Different (7) 1. Adder (5) .1. Hearth (8) 1. Smoothing tool (4) 5. Put off (5) 2. Series (3) 5. Horse-racing (4) 2. Income (7) 8. Weighty (9) 3. Finished (4) 9. Dwells (5) 3. Province of Canada (12) 9. To tear (3) 4. Catch-phrase (6) 10. Unsuccessful person 4. To pay (6) 10. Prevalent (4) 5. Scatter (8) 11. Without equal (12) 6. Customary (5) 12. Relevant (8) 6. Courage in endurance (9) 13. Deep ditch (6) 7. Diabolical (8) 14. Short, fast race (6) 7. Drive off (7) 14. Emphasis (6) 8. Elusive person (4-1-3-4) 15. Shrewd (6) 11. Alien (9) 17. Depressed (12) 12. Intent (8) 17. Fit to be chosen (8) 13: Point out (8) 20. Run faster than (7) 15. Perform (7) 18. Joke (4) 14. Accelerate (5,2) 21. Harden (5) 16. Light wind (6) 21. Put on (3) 16. Gratify (6) 22. Fall slowly (4) 18. Attack (3,2) 22. Within reach (9) 19. Behave towards (5) 23. Unprotected (8) 19. Swarming insects (4) 24. Expiate (5) 20. Cut lengthwise (4) 25. Dead (7) 23. Prohibit (3)

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GOOD E-ViENtMG- CjfOD uy To The. l a s t h ip p y * * — • • NEXT W E E K ___ Fuwtff HOW VHXJUXL foiD MOWEYGO HAwp M Hm D NO XT5 Not ThE End.'..HAP! CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 1! THE RETURN OF THE TOUGH INFORMATION WANTED VIDEO EVENING POTATOES' A 21 year old female University Student Zoom Creative presents an evening of video 18th August. Bookings: Phone Rohan from the US is interested in general informa­ at Star Art Gallery in K.Rd., Thursday August (09)4159930, (No door sales). And tion about work abroad in New Zealand; 11th 7pm. Videos on the latest skateboar­ remember... 'it's the potato makes the meal’. temporary employment agencies and the ding: Ramp/Street Skating; Music video, overall cost of living for a student. Employ­ social comment. Small admission chargbe. FOUND ment information on secretarial work, cater­ 1988 WINTER GENERAL ing agencies, Au Pair, salesperson etc would Green anorak on Maclaurin Chapel. Phone PHOTOSOC extn 7731 or call at secretary's office. MEETING be appreciated. Also, any enquiries about similar opportunities or conditions in * PHOTOSOC CONTEST CLUBS FOR AFFILIATION Manhattan, New York are welcomed and so Entries open 11th July, close 12th August. are replies from anyone interested in mak­ 3 prizes of $50!! plus highly recommended. Dance Fiji The 1988 W.G.M. will be held in the Coalition For Democracy In Fiji Recrereation Centre on Tuesday, 9th ing a new friend or finding a potential room­ The categories are - mate (flatmate). Contact : Auckland University Kohanga Reo August commencing at 1pm. Agendas will 1. Emotion - Colour (print or slide) Maria Matteo W hanau be ready on Monday, 8th August and can 2. Contrast - Black and White 108 - 22 50th Avenue 3. Open - either B & W or colour ...... and those clubs mentioned in last be picked up from AUSA reception. Corona, New York 11368 Enter as many times as you like. week's Craccum. U.S.A. To enter : These clubs will be up for affiliation at the 1 photo $2.00 next SRC: If quorum is not reached at the Winter General Meeting then SRC will be PUBLIC MEETING 3 photos $5.00 - Put photo and money in sealed envelop and held at that time, otherwise the next SRC PETER WATKINS give to AUSA reception. (If you want a will be in the first week of the third term. FILM MAKER & MEDIA COMMENTATOR print/slide back include a self-addressed envelope). How do media structures affect public PSYCHOTRONIC MOVIE CLUB Grand Prize Giving - The final Club night of debate? Official Psychotronic Products endorsed TE HUINGA TAUIRA the year 21st September. This is an opportunity to discuss with this by P.M.C.: He panui ki a koutou nga tauira, nga most important film maker some of the con­ Any enquiries phone Alison Adams-Smith Bands: Black Flag, Motorhead, Suicidal rangatahi hoki o te Whare Wananga o Tamaki cerns which emerge in his latest, longest and 5 5 9 -9 4 0 . Tendencies Makaurau. most extraordinary film - THE JOURNEY - T.V.: Wrestlemania, Love Connection, Ka tu te Huinga Rangitahi i to taatou marae which had its NZ premiere in Auckland last Space 1999, Newsbreak a te marama o Akuhata 12, 13, 14. No reira SKIING year. A short extract from the film will be T.V. Personalities: Dick Driver, Lindsay nau mai, tomo mai, haere mai ki te korero Gort wants to go skiing Sun 14th Aug to Fri screened. Perigo, Gael Ludlow ki te whai i nga tikanga Maori kia tutaki au 19th or Sat morn, 20th Aug. He needs Honorary Psychotronic Gurnards 1988 Wednesday 7th September 1988 7.30pm, transport and accommodation. He is taatou i runga i te wairua aroha. Conference Centre, School of Architecture. William Seward Burroughs Kia Ora Maori Students prepared to consume all the alcohol he can Auckland University, 22 Symonds Street. Lemmy This year Tamaki is hosting Te Huinga afford to buy (not inconsiderable!). If you can Martin Landau Tauira, which is a national hui for all Maori Presented by the New Zealand Foundation help (and he needs it believe me!!) you can Peter Graves tertiary students. This hui is being held on for Peace Studies (732-379). ADMISSION probably track him down in Craccum or Herschell Gordon Lewis August 1 2 ,1 3 ,1 4 and during this hui there FREE - DONATIONS APPRECIATED. Shadows. Rob Weller will be discussions of the issues and con­ Diana Rigg cerns effecting Maori students. In later UNIVERSITY FILM SOCIETY PUB RUN POSTPONED Winston Peters (provisional) issues of Craccum, the aims and objectives Wednesdays at 6.30pm in B15. The T.T.N. Pub Run, which was to have been Predictions For 1989 of Te Huinga Taura will be presented and fur­ This week: 'Meantime' (U.K. 1983. Dir: Mike held on Wednesday, has been postponed un­ 1. Return of Flares ther information to keep students in touch Leigh). til next term. Organise a team NOW! Rules 2. Jesus will return (wearing flares) and with what is being organised. So Maori Next term (Sept 7th): 'Three Crowns of the as previously published in Craccum. destroy Russians, Iranians etc with flying students come along and get involved. Sailor' (France, 1982. Dir: Raul Ruiz). Wednesday 1pm start. Further details next saucers. issue. 3. Winston Peters elected Supreme Com­ JAGUAR YOUNG MOTORING New membes welcome. mander of NZ. WRITERS AWARD 1988 WINTER LECTURE SERIES FOCUS ON AUCKLAND'S This week's quotes...... If you are under 23 years of age as of 'Nah, I couldn't give that away' (Mr BUSINESS GROWTH September 1st and are interested in Series Titled: NEW ZEALAND'S ENVIRON­ Clock DVA) The growth of the Auckland business com­ automotive journalism then you can win up MENT: SCIENTIFIC PERSPECTIVES. 'It's greeeeat, I'd play it a lot' (ex- Series Chair: A/Prof. Roy Geddes, Dean of munity is the theme of a seminar series star­ to $800. For full details and further informa­ ting soon at the University of Auckland. Gloss star) tion see Gort in Craccum. Science, University of Auckland. Venue: Maidment Theatre, Wednesday, Speakers from the academic and business PUBLICATIONS GRANTS LOST 1-2pm. worlds will focus on different aspects of the SUB COMMITTEE MEETING city's commercial origins. Lost on the 7th floor of Arts building: blue The seminars are : To be held on Tuesday 9th August in Coun­ folder of notes for English 18.416 and text. August 10th:The Antarctic Environment. cil Room at 7pm. Submissions to Media Of­ Please phone Sara 788-213. Speaker: Dr Steve de Mora, Chemistry * Tuesday August 9 - Dr Kenneth Jackson, ficer by Friday 5th August. Department, University of Auckland. senior lecturer in economics at the Univer­ sity, on Trade and traders: Kauri exports. INAUGURAL LECTURES Anyone is welcome to attend the seminars, in Old Government House, corner Eight inaugural lectures by newly appointed of Waterloo Quadrant and Princes Street, professors at the University of Auckland will starting at 5.30pm. * * * % 1988 BNZ WINTER SPORTS be given this year. Details : LEGAL REFERRAL SERVICE TOU RN AM FNT massey university UNIVERSITY HALL, OLD ARTS BUILDING, i v/urvnru 1 PALMERSTON NORTH 22 PRINCES STREET. Available to all students. Mon, Tues, Thurs, 12-2pm. Rm 3, 4th floor, Law School. 22-25 AUGUST 1988 9 August 1pm Professor R.G. Bowman, Ac­ counting & Finance, 'ls the Sharemarket as IT Well people, there's only one week GUILD SHIRTS ^ O rts TOV^ Irrational As It Seems?' left and then we're off to Winter 9 August 8pm Professor M.C. Davison, Tournament. That is, those of you Psychology. 'On Being and Behaving: The Natural Science of Choice.' who have completed your eligibili­ The lectures are open to members of the ty forms and paid me for the travel public. Admission is free. arrangements. This is a final notice. I will not be available during the first E.U. week of the August holidays so ‘ Tuesday Aug 9th - 'Live, the University and Everything' please hurry the finances along. Your chance to speak 1-2pm Functions Rm. The cost of bus fare return is $45 * Prayer meetings - Monday - Friday 8.25am and must be paid this week, no in Rm 144. All welcome. later. It has also been brought to my at­ VOLUNTEERS tention that no billets will be ex­ Volunteer collectors are required for an ap­ pected to provide any com- peal on Saturday, 20th August to send The Brewers guild now has available Sweat teams to the XVIth World Games for the and Tee Shirts with the above logo in Blue petitors/spectators with food. Uh Deaf. on white shirts. Other colours available oh, that's an additional expense; For the first time the International Games soon.Sweats $25, Tees $ 15. See Kerry at but don't panic cos I know that are being held in New Zealand, in CRACCUM. you've all received a fat bursary Christchurch next January. The Auckland Deaf Society has organised a street appeal LOST cheque recently. Hostel accom­ in Queen Street on Saturday, 20th August. Lost solid Gold wrist chain with heart modation will also be available at If anyone is able to help for a few hours con­ shaped lock, up at Shadows at Approx 2pm $100 for 5 nights. This includes 3 tact the Disabled Student Resource Officer, on Friday 5th October. Very valuable - Sen­ John Lambert, or be at the Auckland Yown meals a day. It sounds like a great timentally & in actual value. Please if found Hall at about 8:15am on Saturday. option to me. Apparently the hostel return to CRACCUM office, 2nd floor. Stu­ is only 5 minutes away from the dent Union. University sports fields. Our bus will be leaving at 10.00am on Sunday, 21st August and will be returning on Friday the 26th at 9.00pm. This will give everyone the chance to have a drink before the trip home. Let me reiterate the importance of paying me by the end of this week or else you may find yourselves walking. Don't forget to see me ASAP. Have a great Tourney. ATTENTION SPORT'S he is about to seize the assets of CLUBS certain clubs and close down their Gina O'Shea bank accounts!! Don't say you This notice is to all you NAUGHTY Sport's Officer haven't been given ample sport's clubs who have yet to af­ warning!!! n filiate with AUSA. Our esteemed BNZ Treasurer, Wayne McDougall, is on Gina O'Shea the rampage. It would appear that Sport's Officer 18 ◄ CRACCUM August 9 1988 WARNING: If you are easily offended, narrow-minded, overly sensitive, very naive or just exceptionally stupid then there is a very good chance that at least one of the letters on this page will offend you. If you belong to one of the above categories then you are strongly advised not to read any of these letters without first consulting someone who does not fall into one of the aforementioned categories. After all, we don’t want to strain your brain so much as to require an intelligent, reasonable, open-minded response now do we? Oh, and try and remember that are actually a few people around with a, sometimes obscure or warped, sense of humour so don’t believe everything you read, OK? NOT BORN YET BLAZING JUSTICE Citizen Editor, Dear Plebs; The lawlessness of this city is get­ His conrades fall back in wonder at ting completely out of hand. the might and glory of his being, his Without Judge Red, the enemies turn and flee their hearts Lawbreaker and his cronies appear and souls turned leaden with fear. to be unstoppable. Who was it First to tall to his blazing justice blinded by third eye? Who got was the man of many names, an in­ DEMOCRACY KEEP YOUR MEN drunk and sang 'I married a sect, a plant pathogenic virus, a Dear Craccum, Dear R.I.P. & Frankie, & Real Men, teenage fugritaster from Squd- scurge and an all round cad. Recently you published a letter You can keep the men in this jiblask'? Above all, who cut the Personal note to the Concretin label off your designer boilersuit? concerning the new S.R.C. policies University. This week I've had one Avenger - you owe me a vessel of Yes, bloody Renegade Judge against pornography and striptease in a Skoda, two in white Ford ale for that one!) shows on campus. As the chairper­ Escorts and a real dead-dicked one Grudge! From the fire he rises destroying son of the meeting in question I in a blue Bambina. After all that I Where are you, Scarlet O'Hara? all those that oppose him - so would like to make a few points of still haven't met 'I'm Ugly and My Your people are dying out here, watch yourself Peanuts, 'cos you're clarification. Firstly - it was not a Mother Dresses Me Funny' (and come back home, all is forgiven. next! We await your appearance. Except group of feminists and their friends does your panel van have top class Who is he? - Just your average me, of course, I haven't been born who voted for these moves. The murals?). Doris has had an Engineer Botany Student. meeting consisted of an even who, she says, wouldn't erect yet. number of men and women who anything. Yours, voted overwhelmingly in favour of Real men look for us in the base­ Hugs and kisses Minty the motions. Secondly, if someone ment of the Library on Tuesday (to­ Owen Krysler The Judge Child had such a strong opinion against day). Doris and I will be in pastel these motions - why didn't they ex­ sweatshirts, stone-washed denim BOORISH ercise their speaking and voting mini-skirts, biscuit-coloured stock­ Dear Homo P and 'Out of Order', rights? After all, we still manage to ings so our legs look real brown and WAKE UP I am not an Engineering student but retain some semblance of Reeboks. Dear Craccum, a Law student, I am also a woman. democracy in the Quad on Wednes­ See all of you there. In response to the 'Sorry Out of I was disgusted by both your com­ day afternoons. Order' response to 'Homo P' I am ments on female Engineers as were Finally, thankx to all those peo­ Doris & Myrtle xxx pleased to inform the writer that many other people. I know several ple who do put their energies into P.S. Don't forget: we will 'reward' there are 'Gays' in the School of women Engineers and they are S.R.C. I will now reveal the secret you. Engineering, myself included. Fur­ lovely people, they are also no less of the chocolate fish awards - ther more I am but one of 'many' attractive than any other group of everyone who gets one goes into a GRADUATE TAX SUPPORT Gays studying Engineering. women on campus. Not all would draw for a bottle of Baileys. Dear Sir, Having worked in the electronics make the cover of Vogue but if you I'm at Varsity for selfish reasons: to industry for several years before at­ look the way you sound I don't Fiona Stevens earn more money, to influence tending the School of Engineering think you would either. S.R.C. Chairperson other people, and to have a more I can assure you that the industry I suggest you keep your contriv­ fulfilling job. I did not come here out has a large Gay membership ed and superficial attitudes to LOW INCIDENCE OF of the goodness of my heart to amongst it. From my observation yourselves in future as they show DEMOCRACY benefit society with my brains. this is not only a characteristic of you up as boorish, shallow minded, the electronics sectar but other as stupid and unpleasant people - true Dear Craccum, Despite this, society gives me an well. as it may be. If either of you had any With respect to Fiona Stevens' almost free education. So wake up and open your eyes decency in you, you would (S.R.C. Chairperson) letter on the I support graduate tax. The cost to reality, honest it won't harm you. apologise - but I doubt you would meeting results of the SRC policies of providing me with a degree is have the courage for this. against pornography and small in relation to the big bucks I can earn with it. I don't expect Happily Engineered Gay striptease, we would like to note L.L.B. that in point of fact the inference anyone to pay for it, except me. that the voters were not all Likewise I don't expect to support feminists and their friends because Universities unless myself or my the meeting consisted evenly of children attend it. POETIC RESPONSE There is one big problem. Some both men and women (womin?) is In Reply To The 'Reply To Homo. degrees have their worth not realis­ irrelevant as feminists can be of P/ ed by income, especially Arts either gender. Secondly as is well Dear 'poet' degrees. This is probably why the known in the field of student too ashamed to sign your name Government will only impose politics the vast majority of well, we too can play your game... graduate tax on a graduate's in­ students are too apathetic to care Freud, we think, will be of use come if it is above the average about such issues, and as such To Analyse your stream of abuse. wage; such a person is already don't bother to attend SRC let Number one - and its no joke financially better off than half of alone vote. Admittedly this is a poor Here's a true-life Real Kiwi Bloke the nation's workforce. Also, the state of affairs especially in that it We wonder are you afraid of gays proposed graduate tax is to be on­ allows a comparatively small Or does offensive trash earn mates 'n' praise ly 2%; the less income the less you number of people (be they political And we know your first statement's not true pay. In any event 2% is chicken agitators or genuinely concerned But no-one with taste would find attraction in you feed, and is probably less than about the problem) to effectively What's more homophobia's not your only sin what a lot of students spend on control the student policy. This in Misoginy also creeps in cigarettes. This may, to a limited turn implies that in fact the in­ If you considered women more than just a screw degree, help to keep roll numbers cidence of democracy on a They may start to respect you too. up in Arts courses despite a Wednesday afternoon is in fact We hope this vitrolic sting is enough graduate tax. quite low. To affect a man with no understanding of love The opposition to graduate tax We don't need to hide behind swearing and anominity Yours with respect must decide whether they deserve a free education. A Political Agitator We who will never be yours, P.S. Why not make the draw for a Dave and Carley Yours Underwater, decent alcoholic beverage such as (David Fleming and Carlene Wilson) Ouzo? Martin Price

CHAPLAIN'S If only things were otherwise... time of the year, as the moment of In times of stress, it is useful to but they aren't. Life does not con­ truth in the examination room remember that while things may CHAT sist of wishful thinking but of tak­ looms ever nearer. happen to 'me' - and they may not ing initiatives and responding it is dangerous because it be of my choosing, 'I' can decide WISHFUL THINKING positively within an imperfect deludes us into thinking that the what I will do about them. world. problem lies elsewhere. The motto The world is not a perfect place, It is a popular heresy to imagine Distance, as the poet remarked, of the University can roughly be the Bible simply affirms that God's that all is for the best in the best lends enhancement to the view, but translated 'By innate skill and by creation was good. Our life in it is of all possible worlds - or it would when we get there, the grass on hard work', and these applied in the sometimes a choice between the be IF only..... the other side is not always world of what is ot what might be good and the best, but often, as If only things were a bit different, greener. fondly imagined. J.K. Galbraith says, it is a choice if only 'they' would appreciate my Wishful thinking may be a plea­ It is also dangerous because the between the disastrous and the^ gifts, if only I had., (picked the right sant form of escapism, but over- time and energy spent on dreaming unpalatable. numbers for LOTTO?) if only I indulgence can be dangerous. away 'if only' would be more pro­ hadn't (but I did). It is particularly dangerous at this fitably spent on making our goals Contributed by J.M.K. reality. for the A.U. Chaplaincy CRACCUM August 9 1988 ► 19 WARNING: If you are easily offended, narrow-minded, overly sensitive, very naive or just exceptionally stupid then there is a very good chance that at least one of the letters on this page will offend you. If you belong to one of the above categories then you are strongly advised not to read any of these letters without first consulting someone who does not fall into one of the aforementioned categories. After all, we don’t want to strain your brain so much as to require an intelligent, reasonable, open-minded response now do we? Oh, and try and remember that are actually a few people around with a, sometimes obscure or warped, sense of humour so don’t believe everything you read, OK?

DISTRACTION? MEDIA OFFICER Dear Peanuts, MISCONCEPTIONS Who is this male Botany student? Dear Editor, and could he be distracted by a There appear to be many semi-tall nubile brunette with no in­ misconceptions regarding the terest in plants whatsoever? AUSA executive position of MEDIA OFFICER. This is unfortunate in Yours... light of the recent portfolio Lawnmower elections. The Media Officer is responsible for Student Publications, not in t e r v ie w ™ FREE SPEECH? general 'media' or the dissemina­ Dear Cwaccum, Dear Craccum, tion of information to the student Ath a withult of the wonderful I recently attended a 'Students for NO EASY TARGET body. The spokesperson for AUSA withsponse to my theggethtion, I Christ' meeting on the 20th July at Dear Editor, is the President. 1pm in the B28 lecture theatre, In reply to Ernest Markham's letter: thould vewy muth like to interview If students are dissatisfied with the prothpective girlieth for page which was booked by this club for It is understandable that someone their 'Press' or the lack of informa­ thwee. I mutht wemind you all that an American speaker, with a topic living within, and benefiting from, tion it is their responsibility as union condidaths mutht have an IQ of 'Aids, the Great Media Cover Up', an oppressive state may not know, members to do something about it. leth than their thoe thize and (for general attendance) or be willing to accept, the facts of Copies of the Constitution by dimenthons of awound 30-25-30 Unfortunately, not much of this the situation. which executive run AUSA are was heard as it was interrupted by It is Ernest Markham who needs at leatht. available from reception at the Stu­ I will conduct interviewth Fwiday the aggressive agitation of some to try to 'come into the 1990s' and dent Union building and the athternoon (1pm) in the bewoved Gay/Lesbian Right supporters accept that Israel can no longer ex­ Secretary of AUSA is there to give Thadowth. You mutht, for the pur- (some of whom were on the AUSA pect other countries to ignore its in­ assistance. potheths of recognithion, wear exec or were candidates in the re­ humanity under the umbrella of the your weft thieve only wolled up. I cent by-election) who continued to holocaust. Although the holocaust Michelle Hunt shout from the audience and be was the worst inhumanity commit­ will appwoach you!!! MEDIA OFFICER generally disruptive because some ted by any power, it is a contradic­ All thuckthethful applicanth we- of the speakers opinions lay in other tion for Jewish people to use this MEMORABILIA WANTED main the thole pwoperty of Getit Toffe(lnc) thubject to the Public directions to theirs. to justify a state which To everybody, Thex Act 1989, Thecthion The lecture theatre was even­ discriminates against another peo­ Whilst listening to Tracy Chapman 4(pawagwaph(iii), part(c)). tually abandoned by the club who ple on the basis of religion. 'Critics (thanks Tam) on my brother's had no wish to argue with this writing from afar' include hundreds Walkman (thanks Konny) in the car­ Thigned group, and the meeting was then of thousands of Palestinians expell­ park, sitting in my car, waiting for taken over by the pressure group. ed from their homeland and unable Getit Toffe 8.30pm to roll on (like the guy and This is the question I put to the to return because of this girl in the yellow escort parked op­ AUSA executive : how do clubs discrimination. FEMINIST VIEW posite me), I thought now was an prevent this type of thing happen­ Markham ignores the existance Dear 'So-called Old Fashioned Sex­ opportune time to write. The pur­ ing? ls there really 'Freedom of of Jewish groups within and out­ ist Pig', pose? Well, a friend I write to who Speech' at Auckland University or side Israel who oppose the iron fist Reading your letter in Craccum recently immigrated (or is that only 'Might is Right'? policy, and the presence of a facist em?..) from London, England, to (August 2), you know the one group, Kach, in Israel, which about women trying to piss stan­ Perth, Australia, has set up Yours truly, ding up, made me realise why I am discriminates to the extent of ad­ business and is desperately... Helen Smith vocating a 'final solution' to the 'looking for NZ releases and a feminist. 'Arab' problem. By disregarding memorabilia, i.e., You may feel that 'opening doors, PARKING these opposing movements, he at­ Tour programmes and of course helping a lady into her chair, giving Dear Students, tempts to perpetrate the myth that film posters. up your seat on public transport,' I regularly park in the student car­ the Jews in Israel are united against Condition would be important are mere acts of chivalry, but you park and am of the opinion, along a common enemy. and a comprehensive description obviously do not realise that this with all the other students who Israel is no longer an 'easy would be appreciated. If it's so-called chivalry is instrumental in park there, that things have got to target', as Markham suggests. The Music or Film related, and it's in­ undermining the little self-respect change. fact that it is ranked sixth in the teresting... I'm interested!' and independence that women re­ This was brought up at SRC and world's nuclear powers, and has That covers everything! This is a tain. These actions only serve to it was decided to do something vast military supplies, compliments 'business proposition' of sorts, so make women more dependent on about it. But what is this crap about of the US, makes it a threat rather anyone who could help in any way men, emotionally and physically, a 'student car sticker system'. On than a target. How else is Israel at all will receive appropriate and incapable of looking after my windscreen I have - a registra­ capable of military co-operation remuneration (I think!). So if you ourselves. Then you call us stupid tion sticker, a warrant sticker (ha both with South Africa and with can help Daniel out (please!) write and dumb when we can't change ha!!), a change my oil sticker, a tec- the Contras in Nicaragua? to ... a tyre or fix the plumbing. When tyl sticker and I don't want Although Markham refers to the Dan's Macabre have we ever had the chance to anymore fucking stickers. (And if I Palestinians as a minority group, c/o 36 Nyara Crescent learn? And so, when these are call­ catch the bastardos who put the they were in fact a majority before Craigie 6025 ed non-contact rape, they indeed 91FM sticker on my car they are the great influx of European Jews Western Australia are. They undermine a woman's dead). What's the problem? What into the country, and the subse­ Thank you for printing this if you security in herself, leaving her as could be more simple than show­ quent creation of Israel. They are print this - 1 tried real hard to keep helpless and vulnerable as rape ing your I.D. for entry? So I therefore an artificially created my writing nice and neat... does. therefore suggest you all stop minority, and it is wrong to suggest As for your figures quoted from wasting valuable time and money that they should be disregarded for Have a nice day all, Masters and Johnson showing that by discussing this crappy sticker this reason. Gertrud '99% of women can only get it off system and just pass a ruling (or Markham praises the workings of (Gert - not Gort) if they resume[sic] the dominant whatever you do) that says '... and the free press, in spite of the fact position on top.' Firstly they are ab­ verily he/she who has successfully that the Occupied Territories are QUANTUM STEP solutely ridiculous - how did M & J braved the rush hour shall be under 95% military censorship. Hey Editor, Man (60's lingo, not collect these statistics? By granted entry upon presentation of Even Jewish editors who have sexism), telephone survey? Secondly do you student I.D...... '. shown sympathy for the Palesti­ I don't think I really like it when you t>lame women for wanting to be on Problem solved. nians have suffered. So far 244 start posturing about a late, only top? Then at least they have some As for those little tickets I get Palestinians have been killed in the moderately great band that most of control and they do not feel so every time I enter the carpark, is current uprising, many more have the masses haven't heard of. It's helpless. Thirdly M & J must this some strange lottery I don't been injured and imprisoned. It is only a small quantum step to in­ assume that 99% of women have know about? What a fucking waste no longer possible to pretend that jokes and then you know where sex with men, BULLSHIT, lesbians of time and money (again). I have Israel is a stable country in which we'll be don't you? Wit, erudition, and celibate women constitute hundreds of the bloody things, they everyone has basic human rights. good taste! Please, keep it plebian. much more than 1% of the female litter my floor, clog my ashtrays and Markham's apparent ignorance of After all think what could happen population. So think about that block my ventilation and I'm sick to the situation perhaps undermines next, for example: Nobody ever one. death of them. If anyone can shed the importance of being 'Ernest'. listens to me, I might as well be a And to Craccum, for the educa­ light on why we are issued with Leonard Cohen record. Aaargh! tion of men and the general well­ these infuriating pieces of paper, Naomi Rousseau and Francisca da being of women, you would do well please, please tell me!!! They are Gama Yours with vision, not to print letters like O.F.S.P.'s. Do too small to use as wall paper and ED's Note: Correspondence on this Larks Tongues in Aspic you care at all about the influence too rough to use as toilet paper so subject is closed. ED SEZ: Sir, your intelligence and you have on your readers? if you have a use for them then a musical knowledge is commen­ reply would be greatly appreciated. dable. May the ghost of Jimi Hen­ Kia kaha, Waahine maa. drix protect you from Leonard Beatle Treadwell Bye for now guys and girls, Cohen forever. (Women's Rights Officer) ALAN