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Follow us on Facebook at Empty Closet News • Follow us at www.twitter.com/EmptydClosetNews number 475 a publication of the gay alliance FEBRUARY 2014 B ill would protect NYS youth from abusive “therapy” On Jan. 13 the Empire State are long overdue.” Pride Agenda launched a cam- “Banning this so-called ‘ther- paign to pass a bill aimed at apy’ is a bipartisan issue. Since protecting LGBT youth from last spring, legislation prohibit- psychological abuse. Bills were ing it has passed with biparti- jointly introduced in both hous- san support in New Jersey and es of the NYS legislature by was upheld by a federal court in State Assemblymember Deborah California,” said Senator Brad an

Glick (Assembly bill: A06983A) Hoylman (D,WFP – Manhat- w o as well as State Senator Brad tan). “It’s time for New York G c Hoylman and State Senator to protect our kids from this a Michael Gianaris (Senate bill: insidious practice, which has r-M ne r

S04917A). been thoroughly discredited by e o

This legislation would pro- experts and poses a serious threat W ne tect LGBT youth from so-called to the health and well-being of i therapists who use dangerous LGBT youth.” a

and discredited practices aimed “We cannot wait any longer : s o

at changing their sexual orienta- to protect our LGBT youth from t tion or gender identity or expres- ignorant attempts to change Pho Lorr sion. their sexual orientation,” said Lovely Warren was sworn in as Rochester mayor on Jan. 4 at the Auditorium Center. “Trying to change someone’s Senator Michael Gianaris (D – true identity through so-called Queens). “New York has a long therapy is a dangerous prac- history of leadership on LGBT G ay Alliance leader participates in tice that can seriously harm our issues and it is time to send a LGBT youth,” said Pride Agen- message that we will not stand Mayor Warren’s swearing-in ceremony da Executive Director Nathan for gay conversion therapy, a M. Schaefer. “Anyone who says practice not based on science but By Susan Jordan they can change an LGBT per- on intolerance.” Scott Fearing, Executive son from being who they are is The vast majority of asso- Director of the Gay Alliance, preying off of fear and confu- ciations of mental health prac- was invited to speak briefly at sion to sell a practice that doesn’t titioners and researchers all Mayor Lovely Warren’s public work and causes lasting harm.” acknowledge the detrimental swearing-in ceremony on Jan. “We are happy that Empire effects that this damaging prac- 4 at the Auditorium Center. State Pride Agenda is advocating tice has on minors. The Ameri- During the election campaign, for this important legislation,” can Medical Association and the Warren was criticized by many said Assemblymember Deborah American Psychiatric Associa- members of the LGBTQ com- Glick (D – Manhattan). “Stron- tion oppose this practice and are munities, for her opposition to ger laws to protect LGBT youth joined by the American Acad- marriage equality and to gay from being subjected to these emy of Child and Adolescent rights in general. unsafe and disproven practices Psychiatry, the American Acad- In an interview with the emy of Pediatrics, the American November Empty Closet, and at Association for Marriage and the Pride Rainbow Flag-raising Family Therapy, the American last July, Warren said she has THANK YOU Counseling Association Gov- overcome her previous feelings erning Council, the American of prejudice against LGBTQ Psychoanalytic Organization, people. Following the ceremony, the American School Counselor Fearing said, “Her inclusion of Lovely Warren and Scott Fearing. Tahe G y Alliance the LGBTQ communities in a appreciates Association, the National Asso- ciation of Social Workers and public event sends a strong mes- the continuing the Pan American Health Orga- sage.” “The Gay Alliance knows the the quality of life for all citizens. partnership of nization. Fearing told The Empty important role that the LGBTQ “For lesbian, gay, bisexu- businesses within California passed a similar Closet, “To have a woman of communities play in Rochester, al and transgender people are our community comprehensive legal ban against color as Rochester’s 67th Mayor so we are pleased to continue our part of all identities. You will this process in fall of 2012 and made this inauguration a strong relationship with the City find us at all economic points, who support momentous occasion. Because leadership.” from rich to poor, a part of all our mission and New Jersey passed its own in the summer of 2013. Several other so much of our work revolves Scott Fearing’s remarks at the racial and ethnic identities; we vision. states and Washington DC are around equal gender access, and inauguration follow: are of all religions, ages, abili- currently considering such bans. full human and civil rights for “Mayor Warren, gathered ties and disabilities, we work in Platinum Level In June 2013, after 36 years all people, the Gay Alliance was dignitaries, ladies and gentle- every profession and live in every of leading the “ex-gay” move- honored to have been invited to men, thank you for this oppor- neighborhood. (B ill continues page 3) participate. tunity to say a few words. “In short we are Rochester — “Since 1973 the Gay Alliance and today we proudly join with has been a part of Rochester’s all of our neighbors to congratu- N ew Feature: long history as a national leader late Mayor Warren on her inau- in honoring and emphasizing guration.” ■ LGBTQ Living social justice for all people. Page 17 “In our 40 years we can point to many local efforts that have had statewide and national impact, but, going back even further, well before the Gay Alli- InsideEditorials...... 2 ance came into existence and Local/State News...... 3 before the beginnings of the ‘gay National/International News..... 4 liberation’ movement of the Interview: Rev. Tom Decker...... 7 Health: Flu vaccine...... 14 1960s, members of our commu- Opinion: Fla. marriage ...... 15 nities played pivotal roles in cre- LGBTQ Living ...... 17 ating this amazing town. Shoulders To Stand On ...... 21 “In the future our role to Columnists ...... 22 make Rochester great will not Community ...... 25 change. The LGBTQ commu- Entertainment: Normal Heart....27 nities see a very bright future for Gay Alliance: Youth Update...... 30 Calendar...... 34 Rochester and we look forward Classifieds...... 34 to working with Mayor Warren Comics...... 34, 35 to create a Rochester that focus- The Gay Alliance is publisher of the P artnerships Empty Closet, New York State’s oldest es on livability with thoughtful LgbtQ newspaper. continue page 2 urban planning that increases 2 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014 G ay Alliance Board of Trustees David Zona, President, Jessica Muratore, Vice-President, W. Bruce Gorman, Secretary, Peter Mohr, Treasurer, Perspectives Jason Barnecut, Chris Hilderbrant, Emily Jones, Jeff Lambert, Jeff Markarian, Steve Santacroce, William Schaefer, Chris Woodworth T he Empty Closet Editor G ay Alliance Executive Director Susan Jordan Scott Fearing at www.gayalliance.org. You can been golden. Here in the “home G ay Alliance partnerships find us on Facebook at Empty of the brave, and land of the continued from page 1 Closet News – now breaking free” we have been shamefully news can come your way with- slow to find ways to fully wel- THANK YOU out delay! come the humanity of all our So what are we in the Roch- citizens. ester community looking for- Laws in the US have g old Level ward to this month and in the changed, but, we all know that near future? The Red Ball on individual feelings and actions Feb. 8 at the Diplomat Banquet cannot be legislated. It may Center is coming up, with a Ste- be illegal for me to act like ampunk theme, which should be a bigot, but it is not illegal a lot of fun. for me to be a bigot. While it March is LGBTQ Health took many people, many years of Month, and we hope to encour- work to make positive changes to age healthy living. One treat laws and policies, it is the broader City of Rochester during Health Month will be societal change that requires the A new look for the the JCC production of Larry B e Out, Reach Out, ongoing attention of individu- Absolut/Malibu Kramer’s classic play about the als who care about full LGBTQ new year early years of AIDS, “The Nor- Roc Out equality. silve r Level The EC has a new look for mal Heart” – see page 27 for an Recently the staff and board As we plan the Gay Alli- 2014 – we hope you like it. We interview with director Brian of the Gay Alliance have been ance of the future we reflect 3 Olives Coughlin. on our past and take stock of have upgraded the quality of focused on budgeting and plan- Baccardi the paper The Empty Closet is We also look forward to ning. These can be tough and today’s realities. How can we printed on. cooperating with the new city challenging tasks for small non- best serve our LGBTQ com- We are also introducing a administration, and are pleased profits such as the Gay Alliance. munity members, as well as our new feature series: “LGBTQ that Gay Alliance Executive No matter how challenging, friends, families and allies? One Living”. Each installment will Director Scott Fearing was invit- these tasks also offer a wonder- thing for certain, we know that deal with a different kind of ed to speak at Mayor Lovely ful opportunity to reflect upon we must continue our advocacy Barefoot Wine Warren’s public swearing-in cer- work, just as we must continue LGBTQ family, home, etc. This our work and the communities Hedonist Artisan Chocolate month we are starting out with a emony last month. we serve. our educational efforts. feature on safe, affordable hous- As we embark on 2014, let’s For 20 years I have been But equally important, and John’s Tex Mex ing options for our growing pop- not forget that, although we deeply enmeshed in LGBTQ often over looked, is the need ulation of seniors. can now marry legally in New community leadership and to celebrate our identities and In future months, we hope to York, and more and more states activism. The changes I have communities. We must celebrate cover different kinds of gay fam- are legalizing and/or recogniz- seen are remarkable, but pale being out as an LGBTQ person ilies, from now-legally-married ing our marriages and families, when one considers the changes -- proud of our own LGBTQ couples raising kids, to youth, to there is still work to be done. that the Gay Alliance has seen in identity. Likewise others need to people who prefer to remain sin- Rights we’ve fought for could its 40 years. celebrate their love and accep- gle, but rely on extended families be taken away; LGBTQ youth However, current headlines tance of their LGBTQ children of friends (a time-honored tra- are still harassed; all of us (espe- about new anti-LGBTQ laws in or to be proud to have LGBTQ dition). Some articles may deal cially trans people of color) are India, Nigeria, Uganda and Rus- friends, roommates, cousins and with the latest trends in interior still in danger from hate vio- sia should cause all of us to pause neighbors. design, the advantages and dis- lence, and the Albany legislature and reflect on the changes we The Gay Alliance will con- advantages of living in the city has yet to pass GENDA, giving have seen have come about, and tinue to work for the full inclu- or the suburbs, etc. And how transgender New Yorkers basic what our successes means for our sion and safety of all LGBTQ about a story on “Pets and Their civil rights. That has to change communities futures. people in the greater Rochester b ronze Level -- and soon! area, we will accomplish this Gays”? Positive changes have become Ameriprise If you have ideas for the Finally, please remember that the norm of for LGBTQ people through our advocacy and edu- series, or would like to be inter- when you are seeking the EC at living in the US, and many other cation and by taking the time to Canandaigua viewed, please let me know. non-gay-owned businesses and countries. These changes have celebrate who we are and all that National Bank & Trust Several new photographers don’t see it, you’ll need to try come about through strategic we can offer. Corning Inc. and reporters have come on excavating under piles of “Golf hard work, thoughtful conversa- No matter who you are, Weekly” or whatever, which are we encourage you to Be OUT, Equal Grounds Coffee board and you should be see- tions and, often, personal acts of House ing their work over the next few still being used to conceal our bravery and conscience. ReachOUT and RocOUT; help publication. Malice and bigotry to make Rochester a better place months. And we have a new ad While one must give credit to ■ Harter Secrest and Emery LLP salesperson – columnist Bran- can’t stop gay Americans’ prog- governments and societies that for everyone. ress to full human and civil ImageOut don W. Brooks. Welcome to the ■ value individual liberties over gang, everyone. rights! dogmatic adherence to arcane Jaegermeister Please visit the EC Facebook rules, history shows that when Kittleberger Florist and page and follow us on Twitter, it comes to respecting and hon- Gifts as well as checking out our page oring individuals no society has Labor Federation Macy’s

02/14 New York Life Name Out and Equal NY Address Finger Lakes Outlandish City/State/Zip Sky Vodka Phone St. John Fisher E-mail Tompkins Enterprises Membership Levels: Victory Alliance ❏ $30-99 Advocate ❏ $100 Champion Wegmans ❏ $1,000-4,999 Triangle Club ❏ $5,000+ Stonewall Woods Oviatt Gilman LLP ❏ Check enclosed in the amount of ______(check #______) c hampion Level Please charge my credit card in the amount of ______To: ❏ American Express, ❏ Discover, ❏ MasterCard, ❏ Visa Mass Mutual of Buffalo Credit card # ______Exp. Date: ______Park Avenue ❏ I would be proud to have my donation publicly acknowledged. Merchants Association B enefits: Subscription to The Empty Closet mailed to home or work, Pride @Work plus privileges at each level. Phone: 585 244-8640 or mail to: Gay Alliance, 875 E. Main St., Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605. Home delivery of the Third Presbyterian Church Empty Closet is free with your annual membership. The Woolbright Group HCR Home Care february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 3

legislators not to be swayed by page one those who will falsely claim that their religious freedom is some- how threatened by passing a ( Bill from page 1) bill that ensures quality mental NewsFronts ment, Exodus International dis- health care for New Yorkers. banded amid growing skepticism As bills like this have worked of its top officials and board through state legislatures, pur- members that sexual attractions veyors of “ex-gay” quackery can be changed. have shown up to defend their L ocal and State More information about this right to hurt kids with their issue can be found at prideagen- false teachings and beliefs, and da.org/protectingyouth. New York will be no differ- Truth Wins Out ent. During New Jersey’s debate, Truth Wins Out on Jan. 14 Christopher Doyle of the Inter- praised New York State Assem- national Healing Founda- blymember Deborah Glick and tion appeared as an advocate for State Senators Brad Hoylman allegedly former homosexuals, and Michael Gianaris. waving around a picture of his “The science is in on so- family has proof that repara- called reparative therapy. It tive therapy works. Doyle has doesn’t work, and it hurts peo- admitted that he tried to molest ple,” said Truth Wins Out Execu- little girls in his mother’s daycare tive Director Wayne Besen. “We when he was ten, a disturbing applaud these New York lawmak- fact considering IHF’s focus on ers for standing up for science youth and Doyle’s status as an and quality mental health care by ill-credentialed counselor. working to eliminate these harm- In the same hearing, “ex-gay” ful practices for the good of the activist Greg Quinlan attempted citizens they were elected to rep- to paint those working to protect resent, and especially for the kids LGBT kids as abusers, dubbing of New York.” it the “Jerry Sandusky Victim- Truth Wins Out recently ization Act.” However, when launched a comprehensive web- Quinlan is around like-mind- site, LGBTScience.org, where all ed people, he is more inclined the foremost scientists studying to practice verbal gay-bashing sexual orientation speak plainly of his own, telling an anti-gay about the current scientific con- conference in 2010 that he was sensus on sexuality. It is an unbi- never a “limp-wristed, flaming ased resource for all interested faggot,” a statement revelatory Daniel McClung and Michael Todd Cohen. in studying the scientific truth of his true feelings about LGBT about sexual orientation. All people. New Jersey legislators Massachusetts last July and the major medical and mental saw the testimonies of these men NYC Councilman York City. couple had only recently moved “The LGBT community health associations, including the as the nonsense they were, and pushes for into a unit on the 38th floor of American Medical Association, passed the bill. could not ask for a more cou- legislation after the building. rageous Attorney General than American Psychological Associa- “’Ex-gay’ charlatans will Cohen’s brother agrees that tion and the American Psychiat- come to the New York legis- gay man dies in Eric Holder. He has seized every a communication system could opportunity to broaden the cir- ric Association, have stated that lature with junk science and high-rise fire have saved the life of his brother- reparative therapy is ineffective at cle of freedom to include LGBT promises of love and healing for in-law. people and their families, and best, and can be extremely harm- LGBT kids, but their records By Greg Hernandez on gay- “I know the facts of this case ful to clients. starnews.com, Photo courtesy of he continues to act with unprec- show that their motivations are and a communication break- edented speed to bring feder- Proponents of “reparative” beyond insincere,” said Truth Jenni Powell down was a major part of the or “ex-gay” therapy frequently Daniel McClung lost his al recognition to married gay Wins Out Associate Director problem,” Greg Cohen said in a and lesbian couples across the couch the issue as a matter of reli- Evan Hurst. “Please, lawmak- life in a smoke-filled emergen- statement. “The details continue gious freedom, but as the NALT cy stairwell during a fire in his country. At every opportunity ers, hear us: there’s no scientific to come in. But they got caught throughout his career, the Attor- Christians Project shows, one debate, this isn’t about religious apartment building on 5 Janu- in the ‘attack’ stairwell.” need not renounce religious faith ary. ney General has shown unpar- freedom, and these men are the Johnson called the commu- alleled leadership worthy of the in order to embrace science and exact sort of people that New His husband of less than a nication system proposal a “sim- best therapeutic practices for year, Michael Todd Cohen, was history books,” said HRC Presi- York lawmakers should be work- ple common sense solution.” dent Chad Griffin. LGBT clients in crisis. Truth ing day and night to protect hospitalized in critical condition “The tragic death at The Wins Out encourages New York ■ from smoke inhalation and is Following last year’s rul- children from.” Strand was entirely prevent- ing by the U.S. Supreme Court still recovering. He was found able,” he stated. The councilman in the same stairwell as were ruling in Windsor v. United points out that such emergency States, Attorney General Holder the couples’ two dogs, who also communications systems already died. declared that the ruling meant exist in commercial buildings that, “Americans in same-sex New York City Councilman and hotels. Corey Johnson introduced leg- marriages are entitled to equal “The groundswell of local protection and equal treatment islation on 13 January aimed at support around this issue was making sure nothing like this under the law.” From this his- stunning,” Johnson added. “It toric statement, a record number ever happens again. sheds light on the need for leg- The three-alarm fire caused of federal rights and benefits of islation addressing this issue, as marriages have begun to flow to panic among resident of The it could protect so many lives in Strand high-rise apartment gay and lesbian couples across New York City.” the country. building on West 43rd Street Support for Cohen has con- when flames shot out of a 20th Attorney General Holder has Y ou are invited… tinued to pour in. In less than been a leader for civil rights floor apartment and smoke filled two weeks, more than $70,000 an emergency stairwell. for LGBT Americans through- to a Steampunk Affaire has been raised to aid in his out his career in public life. As Johnson said McClung’s recovery at fundanything.com. death would not have happened U.S. Attorney for the District Do you love the look of Steam Age tech – Sherlock Holmes - See more at: http://www. of Columbia he formed the first had there been a system in place gaystarnews.com/article/nyc- plus “Tipping Velvet” meets H.G. Wells’ “Time Machine”? The for first-responders or building hate crimes task force, which has Gay Alliance presents the Red Ball 2014, “A Steampunk Affaire,” councilman-pushing-bill-pre- become a model for U.S. Attor- management to immediately vent-fire-related-deaths-gay- on Feb. 8 at the Diplomat Banquet House, 1956 Lyell Ave. communicate with building res- neys throughout the country. The winter fundraiser, which was once known as the Sweet- playwright130114#sthash. From reaching the conclusion idents in emergency stairwells. HUamv1Dk.dpuf heart Ball, will include music by DJ Chuck Argento, appetizers, Residents would have been that the Defense of Marriage Act a cash bar, a huge raffle and a “Best Dressed” prize. You can instructed to use different stair- was indefensible in court to the have your photo taken with Victorian props if you don’t come wells or go back into their homes A ttorney General Matthew Shepard & James Byrd in costume. – to “stay or go.” Eric Holder to Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, The Red Ball is open to everyone and is an opportunity Cohen’s mother, Randi Attorney General Holder’s lead- to enjoy a Valentine’s night out with your partner, friends or a Cohen, is speaking out in favor speak at HRC ership on LGBT issues is with- date, or to connect with the LGBTQ community and meet new of the proposed law which would dinner Feb. 8 in out comparison. For more information or friends. apply to all buildings six stories New York City The ball runs from 7-11 p.m. Tickets are $20 in advance or or higher. to purchase tickets to HRC’s Greater New York Gala, please $30 at the door. They can be purchased online at www.gayal- “My boys are the injured and The Human Rights Cam- ■ liance.org, or at Equal=Grounds, OUTlandish (cash only), Par- deceased men. We need better paign and the HRC Greater visit www.hrcgreaterny.org kleigh and Hedonist Artisan Chocolates. safety rules so this will never New York Steering Committee If you are coming from out of town, or want to treat your happen again,’ she said in a on Jan. 17 announced that Unit- sweetie to a night at the La Quinta Inn, next door to the Ban- statement released by Johnson’s ed States Attorney General Eric quet House, there is a room special of $69 – call 585-254-1000. office. Holder will headline the annual More information is available at [email protected]. McClung, a playwright, Greater New York Gala on Feb. married TV producer Cohen in 8, at the Waldorf Astoria in New 4 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

brought New Jersey in line with federal GLSEN research has found that LGBT regulations. Now you will have birth cer- students sometimes do not report inci- tificates that don’t match driver’s licenses dents because they fear retribution from NewsFronts and passports. In many cases people are their harassers. Some LGBT students were being called out on fraud because their even punished by school officials when documents don’t match.’” they did report. The Reverend Darlene Nipper, Depu- The U.S. Departments of Education national and international ty Executive Director, National Gay and and Justice have released guidelines for Lesbian Task Force Action Fund, stated, schools to address the discriminatory “Gov. Chris Christie’s veto of a bill that and disproportionate discipline that stu- makes it easier for transgender people dents of color face in school, often called to amend their birth certificates shows the “school-to-prison pipeline.” Research how out of touch he is with the lives of shows that LGBT students, who were not LGBT people and our allies. This was an specifically mentioned in the guidelines, opportunity to separate himself from the are also discriminated against and treated extreme right. Instead he seems to want to more harshly in disciplinary situations. be the politician who erects obstacles rath- “This case is a travesty, and a stark er than someone who tears them down. example of how LGBT students, particu- We applaud our partners at Garden State larly LGBT students of color, are forced Equality for their hard work to get this into the ‘school-to-prison pipeline,’” Byard vital legislation passed.” said. “Ironically, this egregious case has RELATED: JoeMyGod.com notes come to light only two days after the U.S. that Christie is not only being investigat- Departments of Justice and Education ed for the September George Washington issued guidelines on school discipline and Bridge lane closings, which blocked emer- school climate designed to move schools gency response vehicles and buses full of away from the biased criminalization of children going to the first day of school: student behavior and toward productive “The feds are now investigating Chris learning cultures of respect for all. Christie for the spending on those inces- “GLSEN was part of the process that sant ‘Stronger Than The Storm’ com- led to that important step forward, and mercials which promoted New Jersey’s we continue to press for even clearer state- Hurricane Sandy recovery and heavily fea- ments of existing protections for LGBT tured Christie and his family at the same students under federal law, and new leg- time he was campaigning for reelection.” islation and policy to ensure that the full Federal authorities are also investi- framework is in place for true LGBT gating the mayor of Hoboken’s charges student safety and access. Zero-tolerance that her city was denied Hurricane Sandy policies must go. Differential discipline funding when she refused to endorse a must end. We must build healthy school private development project. communities where LGBT students and all students of color are fully embraced GLN SE outraged by and supported, free from fear and free to thrive.” charges against bullied In addition, Gutierrez’s sister has cre- California student ated an online petition calling on the dis- trict attorney to drop the charges. GLSEN, the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network, is calling on the A rrests of gay men are Gabriel Landeskog Contra Costa County, Calif., district attorney’s office to drop charges against a already underway in bullied transgender student, Jewlyes Guti- Nigeria All U.S. pro ice hockey C hristie vetoes N.J. errez, who was the only student charged in an alleged altercation on campus with Nigerian President Goodluck Jona- teams have at least one transgender birth three other students, all of whom were than has signed a bill mandating 14 years pro-gay player certificate bill merely suspended. prison time for anyone entered into a Mobile phone video of the altercation same-sex marriage or civil union and 10 By Jonathan Waldheim on gay- Controversial New Jersey Governor shows Gutierrez, who had been harassed years in prison for anyone who partici- starnews.com Chris Christie vetoed on Jan. 13 a bill that by the students, at one point even trying pates or operates a gay club or organiza- Every Northern American profes- would have made it easier for transgender to get away from the other students who tion, or shows any indication that they are sional ice hockey league team has at residents to obtain an amended birth cer- pursued and continued the assault. in a same-sex relationship. least one pro-gay player. tificate. Contra Costa Unified School District A human rights organization on Jan. The National Hockey League The legislation, which passed the state President Charles Ramsey has also called 13 reported that in Nigeria’s northern (NHL), the world’s most popular league legislature last year, simply would have on the district attorney to drop the bat- Bauchi state arrests were already under- of its kind, has secured pro-LGBT rep- allowed transgender residents to change tery charge. way, according to the AP: resentation from every single team. the gender marker on their birth cer- “We are outraged by the district attor- Dorothy Aken’Ova is executive direc- It comes as Colorado Avalanches tificate by providing an affidavit from ney’s office’s decision to charge Jewlyes tor of Nigeria’s International Center for player Gabriel Landeskog announced a licensed medical professional showing Gutierrez with a crime,” GLSEN Execu- Reproductive Health and Sexual Rights. his support of the campaign in an adver- they had undergone medically appropri- tive Director Eliza Byard said. “GLSEN She said on Jan. 13 the new law, already tisement launched on 7 January. ate treatment. calls on the district attorney to drop the being dubbed the “Jail the Gays” law, will A You Can Play spokesperson said, HRC President Chad Griffin released charges and explain why a bullied trans- endanger and even criminalize programs “Today’s NHL milestone is a step. the following statement: gender student was targeted in this case. fighting HIV-AIDS in the gay commu- It’s a worthy accomplishment, and “Chris Christie has a responsibility Racism and transphobia are scourges in nity. She said police in Bauchi state have a an acknowledgment that some of the to look out for the well-being of all New our schools. GLSEN stands with Jew- list of 168 purportedly gay men, of whom toughest players in the world will face a Jerseyans, but today he chose instead to lyes Gutierrez and her family as we con- 38 have been arrested recently. camera and say maybe they’re not who keep in place burdensome regulations for tinue to fight for transgender, lesbian, gay Jonathan’s spokesman confirmed we thought they were. transgender people living in his state. This and bisexual students across the country Monday he signed the act providing pen- “They’re actually sportsmen who legislation would have made it easier for unfairly singled out for harsh discipline alties of up to 14 years in jail for same-sex care about their teammates and fans, transgender residents to amend their birth and outrageous criminal jeopardy. marriage and up to 10 years’ imprison- gay and straight alike.” certificate – a basic form of identification “We also applaud Contra Costa School ment for membership in or encourage- You Can Play, founded in March that is required for many other documents Board President Charles Ramsey, who ment of gay organizations. 2012, supports equality in ice hockey and that speaks to our core identity and clearly understands the problem and what State Dept. objects to repression and was formed after the death of gay humanity. must be done.” The Washington Blade’s Chris player Brendan Burke in a car crash. “Governor Christie is letting down Gutierrez said she has experienced Johnson questioned State Department The campaign, founded by Burke’s transgender New Jerseyans and showing bullying for the past two years because of spokesperson Marie Harf about the new father and brother, has slowly garnered that their well-being is of no concern to her gender identity. She approached a vice Nigerian law and the administration’s support over the past two years and him. We call on the legislature to again principal about the harassment before the objections to it. finally has representation from every pass this legislation and shine a spotlight altercation, but she said he did not ade- While the law bans same-sex marriage club in the league, formed of 23 teams on how harmful this veto is to the citizens quately address the issue. Gutierrez then and gay unions, its more troubling aspects in the US and seven in Canada. of his state.” confronted the three other students sus- deal with the banning of LGBT organiza- Their slogan is “If you can play, you Greg Hernandez commented on gay- pended in the altercation. tions and meetings. Harf said the State can play”. starnews.com: “LGBTI activists in the According to Harsh Realities: The Dept. agrees with that assertion: Landeskog was recently selected for state are furious. ‘It was very vindictive,’ Experiences of Transgender Students in “Obviously, we respect the sovereignty the Swedish Olympic team to play in Garden State Equality Executive Direc- Our Nation’s Schools, a 2009 GLSEN of the Federal Republic of Nigeria and the Sochi in February. His announcement tor Troy Stevenson tells Gay Star News. report, 89 percent of transgender students prerogatives of its national assembly to of support for You Can Play is consid- ‘It had not been a controversial piece of experienced verbal harassment at school pass legislation. We just don’t support any ered to be no coincidence due to the legislation. Just because it had the word in the past year, 55 percent experienced legislation that institutionalizes discrimi- protests surrounding the Winter Games transgender in it, he didn’t want to sign it.’ physical harassment and 28 percent were nation against one select group of people, in Russia. “Stevenson points out that only about physically assaulted. and I think one of the key reasons we are - See more at: http://www. 30 percent of transgender people actually Additionally, only 33 percent of trans- opposed to this is that the law goes far gaystarnews.com/article/all-us- go through a full surgery. gender students who reported an incident beyond prohibiting same-sex marriage.” pro-ice-hockey-teams-now-have-least- “‘A person’s gender identity is about to their school said school officials took Harf also said the State Dept had one-pro-gay-player100114#sthash. who they are, not what their body looks effective actions to address the incident. been monitoring it since its inception and L72YcW00.dpuf like,’ he said. ‘This bill would have february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 5 had been in contact with Nigeria about it: laws of a person’s state of legal residence in “Since the law was in draft form, determining marital status, we can protect we’ve been in continual contact with the states’ constitutionally established powers Jonathan administration, the National from the arbitrary overreach of unelected Assembly and a wide variety of Nigerian bureaucrats.” stakeholders,” Harf said. “Our conversa- Writes the hate group Family Research tions have been focused on our concerns Council in a press release lauding Weber: that portions of the law, again, appear to “The State Marriage Defense Act is a restrict Nigerians’ rights to freedom of response to the Supreme Court’s 2013 expression, assembly and association — decision in United States v. Windsor. The provisions that we’ve been very clear we Court struck down as unconstitutional do not support.” Section 3 of the 1996 Defense of Mar- Harf said she did not know whether riage Act (DOMA), which defined mar- sanctions or restrictions on aid were on riage for all purposes under federal law as the table as a result of this. the union of one man and one woman. Read more: http://www.towleroad. The plaintiff in Windsor had entered into com/#ixzz2qNpEq5B9 a marriage with a person of the same sex “Unconstitutional, dangerous and that was recognized as legal by the state in wrong” which she lived, so the Court said that the “The Nigerian government should federal government should also recognize immediately move to stay implementation the relationship as a marriage. of the Same-Sex Marriage (Prohibition) “However, the Court was silent on the Bill signed into law this month,” said Jes- status of same-sex couples who may have sica Stern, Executive Director of the Inter- obtained a civil marriage in one state, but national Gay and Lesbian Human Rights who live in a state that recognizes only Commission (IGLHRC). According to marriages of a man and a woman. The widespread news reports the law stipu- Obama administration has implemented lates prison sentences for vague actions, guidance for some federal agencies that such as indirectly depicting homosexual- ignores the marriage laws of states that ity, and criminalizes freedom of speech, define marriage between a man and a assembly and association of those advocat- woman. At the same time, other fed- Full Service Tax Preparation ing human rights and equality for lesbi- eral agencies defer to the laws of a per- Complete income tax preparation including e-filing ans, gays, bisexual, and trans individuals son’s state of legal residency to determine (LGBT). marital status for federal purposes. The Individual, Partnership, Trust & Corporate Returns “It doesn’t take a lawyer to understand State Marriage Defense Act would address that this law is unconstitutional, danger- this administrative chaos with a simple Small Business Consulting ous, and wrong,” said Jessica Stern. “The rule that tells the federal government to authorities must stay its implementation respect state determinations of the mari- immediately.” tal status of their residents when applying The bill, signed into law this month, federal law.” Mr. Jean Guy Thibodeau, CPA was adopted by the Nigerian Senate in Naturally, FRC’s professional anti-gay December 2013, in an attempt to rec- activist Tony Perkins is thrilled, and had 31 Putting Green Lane oncile different versions of the bill from Weber on his radio show. Penfield, NY 14526 the Nigerian parliament’s Senate and the Read more: http://www.towleroad. House of Representatives. The bill crimi- com/#ixzz2q0S9chH8 ✔ (585) 586-6160 nalizes same-sex unions, as well as the direct or indirect “public show” of a Va. governor’s first act is www.jeanthibodeau.com same sex amorous relationship, and the “registration, operation, and sustenance” protecting LGBTQ state of “gay clubs, societies, organizations, employees processions, or meetings.” The Nigerian criminal code already criminalizes same- In his first official act following his sex sexual conduct between men, and, January inauguration, Virginia Gov. Terry depending on interpretation, women as McAuliffe signed an executive order pro- well. tecting LGBT state employees from dis- “The law’s overly vague and broad crimination. provisions create a legal uncertainty that Shortly after taking office in 2010, deeply undermines the rule of law,” said GOP former Gov. Bob McDonnell Stern. “Artists, teachers, health workers, stripped such protections from the tradi- human rights defenders, essentially any- tional order, claiming that there was no one who helps another person out, can be evidence that gay people are discriminated criminalized if that person is then accused against. of being gay. This bill threatens to under- McAuliffe: “My administration is mine the very fabric of Nigerian society.” committed to keeping Virginia open and President Goodluck Jonathan report- welcoming to all who call our Common- edly signed the bill into law because, he is wealth home. Executive Order Number reported as saying, a majority of Nigerians 1 sets the tone for an administration that are against same-sex marriage. will not accept discrimination in any “This bill goes far beyond banning form, and one that will work tirelessly to same-sex marriage. It criminalizes com- ensure all Virginians have equal oppor- munity and compassion, ” said Stern. tunity in the workplace, no matter their backgrounds, race, religion, or whom they love.” H ouse Teapublican The Washington Blade notes that the wants to bar federal order includes gender identity and expres- agencies from sion for the first time. recognizing marriages Dying ex-Marine gets Rep. Randy Weber (R-TX) introduced honorable discharge a anti-gay conservative federal legisla- tion on Jan. 9 called “The State Marriage 58 years after he was Defense Act of 2014,” which would bar kicked out for being gay federal agencies from recognizing same- sex marriages in the states that have laws By Andrew Potts on gaystarnews.com banning them. Photo by Outserve-SLDN Said Weber in a statement: “The 10th A 79-year-old man who is dying from Amendment was established to protect cancer has finally had his military service state sovereignty and individual rights record cleared 58 years after he was kicked from being seized by the Federal Gov- out of the US Marine Corps when the ernment. For too long, however, the Fed- military learned he was gay. eral Government has slowly been eroding Faulkner was discharged as an “unde- state’s rights by promulgating rules and sirable” after three years of military ser- regulations through federal agencies. I vice beginning in 1953 during which he drafted the State Marriage Defense Act served in the Philippines and rose to the of 2014 to help restore the 10th Amend- rank of sergeant. ment, affirm the authority of states to Faulkner was diagnosed a few years define and regulate marriage, as well as, ago with cancer and asked his relatives to provide clarity to federal agencies seeking help him secure a dying wish – to have his to determine who qualifies as a spouse for service record cleared. the purpose of federal law. By requiring Former military personnel who were that the Federal Government defer to the (- Ex Marine continues page 6) 6 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

The ACLU called for plaintiffs on ing to the visa agreement between Russia nationalpage one Wednesday, and got “overwhelming inter- and Cuba, Russians are allowed to stay and international est” from couples who were married before without a visa for 30 days.. the stay was granted. In a post on his blog in January, he “We have a great pool and we are talked about flying from Kiev to Havana working through that, and plan to bring via Frankfurt, and expounded on the lack litigation that will protect all marriages, of virtues of the German airport. Mart- whether the couples are named plaintiffs sinkevich did not find German women or not,” the ACLU said in a statement. attractive. He said nothing about his visa In a letter to Utah Attorney General situation or future travel plans. Sean Reyes on Wednesday, ACLU of He was deported from Cuba the third Utah legal director John Mejia called on week in January and placed in the custody the state to recognize the same-sex mar- of Russian police. He is now in a Russian riages performed before the stay: jail and faces what could be three to five “In short, these marriages are valid years in prison for an assault on a Ukrai- and have vested the married couples with nian. rights that the state and federal govern- ments must recognize. Utah and the Oklahoma marriage ban federal government should thus accord same-sex couples who married in Utah all is unconstitutional of the same protections and obligations On Jan. 14 U.S. District Judge Ter- that married couples of the opposite sex ence Kern ruled that Oklahoma’s ban on receive,” he wrote. “When these couples marriage equality is unconstitutional. married, they immediately obtained all His ruling is stayed pending appeal, of the same protections and obligations meaning marriages will not occur imme- enjoyed by all of the other married couples diately in the Sooner State. in Utah.” Human Rights Campaign (HRC) Meanwhile, Utah Attorney Gener- President Chad Griffin issued the follow- al Sean Reyes is telling county clerks ing statement: to complete the paperwork for same-sex “Judge Kern has come to the conclu- marriages performed before the SCOTUS Hal Faulkner is presented with his honorable discharge papers. sion that so many have before him – that stay, the AP reports: the fundamental equality of lesbian and Reyes’ spokeswoman Missy Larsen gay couples is guaranteed by the United (- Ex Marine continued from page 5) H older agrees to says the office is notifying counties. Lars- States Constitution. With last year’s his- en says Reyes’ new directive was issued to toric victories at the Supreme Court guid- kicked out of the military because of their recognize marriages of clear up some confusion and only applies sexuality have been able to get their records ing the way, it is clear that we are on a 1,300 Utah couples to marriages that were solemnized. path to full and equal citizenship for all cleared after the repeal of the Don’t Ask And The National Center for Lesbian Don’t Tell ban on openly gay service mem- lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender The Human Rights Campaign on Jan. Rights (NCLR) announced that it was Americans. Equality is not just for the bers but that process usually takes longer 9 called on U.S. Attorney General Eric joining the law firm of Magleby & Green- six months even with a lawyer involved. coasts anymore, and today’s news from Holder to ensure that the marriages of wood, P.C., as counsel for the plaintiff Oklahoma shows that time has come for Faulkner’s doctors weren’t sure he would more than 1300 gay couples who married couples in Kitchen v. Herbert, the case live that long so LGBTI service mem- fairness and dignity to reach every Ameri- before the SCOTUS stay are recognized which went before Judge Shelby and has can in all 50 states.” ber group OutServe-SLDN got Faulkner by the federal government, the Salt Lake been appealed to the Tenth Circuit: a pro-bono lawyer from New York firm Two plaintiff couples, Mary Bishop Tribune reports: The case was brought by three same- and Sharon Baldwin and Gay Phillips Winston & Strawn and asked the military In a letter delivered to Holder, the sex couples in Utah: Derek Kitchen and to expedite the process. and Susan Barton, filed their case, Bishop civil rights organization said there is no Moudi Sbeity; Karen Archer and Kate v. Oklahoma, in the U.S. District Court The US Marine Corps approved the “legal reason to question the validity” of Call; and Laurie Wood and Kody Par- change of records in just two weeks and for the Northern District of Oklahoma in marriages that occurred between Dec. 20 tridge. On December 20, 2013, U.S. Dis- November 2004. Lead counsel in the case last month two uniformed Marines pre- and Jan. 6, when the U.S. Supreme Court trict Court Judge Robert J. Shelby ruled sented him with his corrected honorable are Don Holladay and James Warner of stayed a federal judge’s ruling overturning that Utah’s ban on marriage by same-sex the Oklahoma City law firm Holladay & discharge papers. Utah’s ban on same-sex marriage. couples violates the U.S. Constitution’s “I didn’t think that maybe I would last Chilton PLLC. Holder has agreed to recognize the guarantees of equal protection and due The ruling comes on the heels of a through all the battles that we’ve had, but marriages. process of law. The Tenth Circuit has a Marine is always a Marine,” Faulkner year-long string of electoral, judicial and The letter pointed out Utah Gov. Gary ordered an expedited briefing schedule, legislative victories for marriage equal- said at the ceremony, according to National Herbert initially directed state agencies to with briefing to be completed by Febru- Public Radio. ity. In recent weeks both the New Mex- recognize the marriages. ary 25, 2014. ico Supreme Court and a federal district “I don’t have much longer to live. I will “Even though the governor’s office Said Peggy Tomsic of Magleby & always be a Marine. Thank you. Semper judge in Utah have ruled in favor of mar- has now made a political decision to cut Greenwood, P.C.: “We believe it is in riage for lesbian and gay couples. fi.” off this recognition, it continues to insist our clients’ best interest now that the The two Marines answered Faulkner Evan Wolfson, founder and president that it makes no pronouncement about case is on appeal, and particularly since of Freedom to Marry, released the fol- with the Marines battle cry, “Oorah!” the validity of these unions,” wrote Chad it is on an expedited briefing schedule, Faulkner only came out to his family lowing statement: “This is a tremendous Griffin, president of the Human Rights to have a national organization with sig- day for loving and committed same-sex in 2005 despite being in a relationship of Campaign (HRC). “There is simply no nificant experience litigating and winning 20 years. couples and their families in Oklahoma, reason for the United States government marriage equality cases to enhance our building on the momentum of eight other not to extend federal recognition to these perspective and fire-power as we move states that ended their restrictions on T el Aviv monument more than 1,300 couples.” forward. marriage for same-sex couples in 2013. honors LGBTQ Holocaust HRC also sent a letter to attorneys “We also wanted a national organiza- The federal district judge has done the general in 17 states where same-sex mar- tion that has a real connection with Utah. right thing by affirming that marriage is victims sent to camps riage is legal, calling on them to recognize Kate Kendell, NCLR’s Executive Direc- a fundamental freedom for all people, gay A new monument unveiled Jan. 10 the Utah marriages. tor, was raised in Utah, worked here as a and non-gay – for all of us who believe in in Tel Aviv pays respect to the estimated Blade poll: Support for marriage lawyer for many years, and has a daughter liberty and fairness. As the case makes its 15,000 members of the LGBT commu- high in Utah living here who finally had the opportuni- way up through the courts, we will con- nity who were sent to concentration camps Support for marriage equality in Utah ty to marry the love of her life when Judge tinue to do the work of having conversa- under the Nazi regime. The Jerusalem Post is at a record high, the Washington Blade Shelby issued his ruling. tions about why marriage matters and reports: reports: “I have known Kate for years. I know creating a climate for victory when the The monument (is) shaped in the form A recent consumer survey conducted she and NCLR are committed to bring- Supreme Court eventually takes the free- of a pink triangle, reminiscent of the pink in Utah reveals that support for same-sex ing equality to every gay and lesbian citi- dom to marry case that brings national triangles LGBT community members were marriage in the state was at an all-time zen in this country, and I know that Kate resolution. The momentum for the free- required to attach to their clothes in the high last week just before the Supreme will work tirelessly to bring equality to her dom to marry will continue as we win concentration camps, and will feature short Court halted the weddings with a stay. home state.” more hearts and minds, working to bring texts in Hebrew, English and German. The poll, conducted using Google’s the freedom to marry throughout the Homosexuality was a felony under the digital platform polling system, found that G ay-bashing Russian country.” Third Reich. The Gestapo founded an support for same-sex marriage reached 41 vigilante flees to Cuba The challenge to the law was brought anti-homosexual unit that kept lists of percent as of last week. Although the poll by the Oklahoma City law firm Holladay nearly 100,000 names of people who were shows a majority of Utah voters have yet Maxim Martsinkevich, the leader of & Chilton PLLC on behalf of Oklahoma alleged members of the LGBT commu- to embrace marriage equality, the result the homophobic vigilante group “Occupy same-sex couples. nity. An estimated 15,000 of those were demonstrates a 13-point increase in sup- Paedophilia” that has lured and tortured “It’s no accident that we’re seeing sent to concentration camps. In Buchen- port over two years when compared to a number of gay teens in Russia before a decision like this in a comparatively wald experiments were carried out with the an earlier poll from Brigham Young Uni- posting its exploits to social media, has conservative place like Oklahoma,” said intention of supposedly curing people from versity. been on the lam for several months now, James Esseks, director of the ACLU Les- homosexuality. David Baker, a Mormon and gay D.C. and Vocativ reports that he has turned up bian Gay Bisexual and Transgender Proj- Tel Aviv mayor Ron Huldai said, in a activist, said he ran the poll in the after- in Cuba: ect. “It reflects the growing consensus statement released Jan. 6, “This monument math of the federal district court ruling Maxim, also known as “Tesak” (Rus- across the country – in red, blue, and reminds us all how important it is for us to in Utah in favor of marriage equality for sian for cleaver), bounced to Ukraine first, purple states – that it’s unfair to exclude respect every human being. It is only natu- more updated data on the state’s support and ended up in Cuba. Russian news site same-sex couples from marriage. At least ral that such a reminder will exist in Tel for same-sex nuptials. Life News ran an interview with him for the moment, love has won out.” Aviv-Yafo – a city that warmly embraces all ACLU to sue Utah Jan. 8. The ACLU has brought challenges groups and minorities.” The ACLU is planning a lawsuit According to posts on Martsinkevich’s of its own against similar laws in Penn- Read more: http://www.towleroad. against Utah for putting marriages on VKontakte social networking page, he sylvania, North Carolina, and Virginia. hold, TPM reports: com/#ixzz2pjJNdpFz was in Cuba as early as Dec. 10. Accord- (Oklahoma continues page 11) february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 7 Interview

Rev. Tom Decker during the reconstruction process at Open Arms.

R ev. Tom Decker of the message in scripture that God loves I wanted to live authentically, so I left the being gay). There is police harassment of everyone, unconditionally. The younger Roman Catholic Church and cut my ties the youth. The first items we sent to the Open Arms MCC children, under three or four, are the in accordance with canon law. Then I youth while they were still living in the By Susan Jordan Rainbow Sprouts.” needed a job, and the only one for whom sewers – police claimed those items were Last year Open Arms Metropolitan The nursery area is next to the sanctu- it didn’t matter who I was, was actu- stolen and destroyed the clothing by fire.” Community Church, with a worshipping ary, with a large observation window so ally the Toronto police force. I’m eter- Jeff Myers has been a member of MCC congregation of about 50 people, moved parents can keep an eye on their little ones nally grateful because that showed me if for around 26 years, and a member of from Chili to 707 E. Main St. in the city. during the service if they wish to. you’re a person who wants to serve and Open Arms for seven years. He told the Congregation members spent months re- Rev. Decker added, “Our first push help people, it doesn’t matter what your EC, “The changes have been amazing. modeling the building. As member Jeff this year is for young families, LGBT and background is. That acceptance changed It’s such a positive change for our church Myers points out, “We all learned how to others. This push is because we know the my life. I was a policeman for nine years and our ministry. It’s very exciting to be a use a sledgehammer!” climate in North America is such that and became the LGBT liaison officer. In part of the community. We’re focused on The Reverend Tom Decker, the people have been disillusioned with tradi- that position I used pastoral skills to build the diverse community in Rochester – our church’s pastor, suggests that the move tional religion, but still yearn for positive community and that rekindled my voca- LGBT brothers and sisters and also the was a transformation, not only of location, spirituality. tion. So I decided to transfer my clergy community at large. We partnered with but also of people. “The second push is for trans inclu- credentials to MCC.” Action For A Better Community and now Rev. Decker told The Empty Closet, sion. That is very much a focus for this Rev. Decker’s husband is Maurice are planning family-oriented events. Some “I can safely say that moving the church year. The spaces are gender-neutral as Tomlinson, attorney for AIDS-Free World city churches are willing (to partner with physically has had the effect that the all spaces must be to qualify to be MCC and international human rights activist, us) and some won’t even speak to us. But church itself was transformed – not the trans-certified churches. We’re in the pro- who had to flee his home in Jamaica when we knew it would be that way.” ■ church but the people changed. There’s a cess of getting that certification.” he was outed as having married a man. He new sense of identity, mission and vision.” In January, with renovation complete, and Rev. Decker have often traveled to The move came because of the feeling the church held an opening celebration Caribbean countries like St. Lucia, Barba- that in Chili there was no growth poten- that drew the head of MCC and other dos and Suriname to train police officers tial. “It was out of the way, and there were elders. The Reverend Elder Dr. Nancy in LGBT sensitivity and awareness. Rev. transit issues,” he said. “If you didn’t have Wilson, Moderator of MCC worldwide, Decker has added a focus on global out- a car, you couldn’t get to the church.” came from Sarasota, Fla. and the Rever- reach to Open Arms. He noted that worldwide, MCC end Elder Ken Martin, retired co-director He said, “We’ve sent two loads churches tend to be located in urban of Church Life and Health, flew in from of clothing and food to homeless youth in areas. However, this is not just because Austin, Texas. It was brave of both of Jamaica (many youth were living in sew- there are more openly gay people in cit- them to travel to upstate New York just in ers until they were ousted by police and ies. Rev. Decker said, “MCC isn’t just ‘the time for the polar vortex! their possessions burned). This church is gay church’. It has always tried to be open, “Both had a struggle to get here,” one of the main supporters of Dwayne’s Jeff Myers and Rev. Decker outside the inclusive and welcoming to all people, Rev. Decker said. “They mentioned the House (named for a youth murdered for church. Photo: Susan Jordan regardless of race, age, gender or sexual incredible transformation of the Roch- orientation. That’s what we are striving to ester church, that used to be described be – the human rights church.” as insular. Now we are reaching out and The new Open Arms church has pro- being an integral part of the community gramming for children and performs wed- in Rochester, both LGBT and otherwise. dings; it is intended to be a ministry for all Both Nancy and Ken did a re-assessment people. Rev. Decker said, “First and fore- of Open Arms and felt that the church is most, this is our space to SHARE. That’s rejuvenated and outreach-focused, caring what we have been doing, even in the for others. You see that for instance in the rubble of construction. We’ve opened the fact that even with all this going on, we had space to the Gay Alliance Youth Group the most successful Thanksgiving basket and Rainbow SAGE, and hope to do even drive (which fed 150 people) and Christ- more of this. We’ve made a determination mas angel drive, which provided gifts for to be a space that is open and inviting to 60 children who otherwise would not have families with children and toddlers. had Christmas presents. It’s that focus on “We have the Rainbow Rangers group breaking through and breaking out and re- for older children who can participate in discovering our identity as a church.” some form of inclusive religious educa- Rev. Decker used to be a Roman tion – an education that is body-positive, Catholic priest. “Being Catholic and not guilt-driven – and the central aim is openly gay didn’t go over too well with to convey an image of God that sends the Catholic church,” he said. “I decided Deacon John Mackereth, Rev. Tom Decker, Rev. Elder Nancy Wilson and Elder Ken Martin. 8 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

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WASSAILING AWAY: The Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus presented their winter concert on Dec. 13 and 14 at Hochstein. Photos: Lorraine Woerner-MacGowan

a whole community of college- I’ve seen ‘Wicked’ and ‘Chicago’ tion of great people.” age guys who watch the cartoons every time they’ve come to town! Robby ended his EC column and call themselves ‘The Bro- I have friends who teach in the this past year. He said, “I’ve nies’ – the Bros who like Ponies. theatre department at Nazareth taken a break from writing but I thought, how cute that pastel and they do a lot of really cool I find my voice as a writer is ponies designed for little girls stuff.” changing and I feel re-inspired are now followed by people of all Robby’s ideal Saturday night to be less introspective and to genders and ages.” would be “dinner and a movie write about global perceptions. About his favorite places in with friends, and a nice conver- I’m becoming more aware of the town, Robby said, “We have sation afterwards about the film world around me.” incredible nightlife here. I enjoy we’ve just seen and about our Robby, an only child, moved hanging out at the Forum and lives. I’m less high-maintenance all around the country while 140.” As far as favorite restau- than the hairpieces would sug- growing up. He arrived in Roch- rants go, he laughs, “Now that gest!” ester in 1993 and was not very I’m back on the Weight Watch- His favorite Rochester events impressed at first. He said, “I ers bandwagon, I’ve discovered are Pride and ImageOut. His gradually realized we’re very for- in my 30s that my 40s and 50s favorite organizations? “The tunate to have a fantastic gay will be happier if I take care of work the Gay Alliance does is community, and I think some- my health. So my favorite res- unparalleled and I’m pretty fond times we take it for granted – taurant is the produce section at of The Empty Closet. When I until we hear from people who Robby in the courtyard at Village Gate. Photo: Susan Jordan Wegmans!” was younger and struggling with live elsewhere! The main thing As a dedicated film buff, his my identity, and how to make about Rochester for me is that favorite places also include the a difference, I remember seeing we are blessed to have the com- M y Own Private a character makes it easier to Little Theatre. He adds, “I have the EC and reading it. I remem- munity and organizations we Rochester: Robby march down Park Ave. without a special feeling for the Dryden’s ber telling myself that one day have. If you have the ability to Morris losing my lunch. film nights with a different I’d write for it – and sure enough be visible, I think you should be, “Whenever there’s a gay theme every month, like classic I did! regardless of how things are bet- By Susan Jordan occasion, like ImageOut, Pin- horror films in October. I also “Also, the Victory Alliance ter these days. There’s still a lot Robby Morris, alias Pinkie kie emerges. She’s my tribute to enjoy going to RBTL musicals – does great work and is a collec- to be done.” ■ Eleganza Extravaganza, used to all the drag queens I’ve admired write the funny and insightful over the years, like Ambrosia column “Confessions of a Serial Salad and Darienne Lake.” (The Blonde” in The Empty Closet. latter, by the way, has just joined He is also familiar to anyone RuPaul’s Drag Race! See the who has shopped at Outlandish. March EC.) Robby talked to the EC recent- Robby says of his work at ly about many things, includ- Outlandish, “It’s more than just ing his love for the Rochester a job. The thing I love about LGBTQ community, and how working here is that to me, with he got his drag name (from a any place that’s gay-related or queen, in the traditional way). gay-friendly, the act of coming He explains, “I was out visit- to work is a playful statement. ing my best friend in San Fran- I’m sort of in the middle of our cisco about two years ago, and community.” we went to the Folsom Street So what is this My Little Fair. I got to hang out with some Pony thing about? Robby says, adult models, and one of them, “It all started with a joke three Mason Starr, knew that I like years ago, around the first time ‘My Little Pony’ and am a fan of I went to Pride in drag. The ‘RuPaul’s Drag Race,’ so he gave little girl in my life, who I call me Pinkie Eleganza Extravagan- The Diva, and who I’ve known za as my drag name.” since she was a baby, was in my Robby does not consider apartment watching the cartoon himself a performer, and you series, and I found myself caught won’t find him lip-synching at up in it, because the message drag shows. He said, “I’m more has all the values I believe in of a spokesperson. When we do – friendship, kindness, loyalty, Pride, people have a hard time honesty and laughter. So I start- believing I’m nervous in crowds, ed collecting the figurines. but I am. So hiding behind “I then discovered that there’s Pinkie with the OUTlandish crew at Pride 2013. february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 11

ern District of Florida, would have been national the nation’s first openly gay African- and international American federal judge. The LGBT Bar cautioned today that Senators must not block the nominations of qualified judi- ( Oklahoma from page 6) cial nominees on the basis of ethnicity or Following the Supreme Court’s deci- sexual orientation. sion striking down the federal Defense “The proper role of the Senate is to of Marriage Act – a case in which the advise and consent on judicial nominees ACLU served as co-counsel to Edie based on their legal qualifications, not Windsor – the ACLU launched the Out to delay or block those nominations for for Freedom campaign to achieve the political purposes or gain,” said Kemnitz. freedom to marry for same-sex couples “Majority Leader Reid has taken historic across the country. steps to stop the obstruction of judi- “We’re thrilled that the court has cial nominations, and we expect Levy struck down this discriminatory law,” to receive a full Senate vote. Anything said Ryan Kiesel, Executive Director of short of an up-or-down vote would be an the ACLU of Oklahoma. “The heartland affront to the nominations process.” of America should be a place where lov- ing and committed couples are able to C ameroon gay man dies obtain the legal protections and dignity afforded by marriage, and this decision after family removes brings us one step closer towards true him from hospital equality.” OPEN ARMS CELEBRATION: Emily Jones, Terry Kelly and Deb Hughes at the recep- A gay man in Cameroon who was tion for the new Open Arms MCC at 707 E. Main St. on Jan. 5. Photos: Bess Watts jailed for sending a text message to LGBT Bar Assoc. backs another man saying “I’m very much in nomination of lesbian love with you” has died after his family judge Judith Levy removed him from a hospital where he had sought treatment for medical com- The National LGBT Bar Association plications brought on by his stay in pris- applauded a Senate Judiciary Commit- on. The AP reports: tee vote Jan. 16 advancing the nomina- Roger Jean-Claude Mbede, 34, died tion of Judith Levy to serve on the U.S. on Jan. 10 after his family removed him District Court for the Eastern District from the hospital where he had been of Michigan. Levy, who is openly gay, seeking treatment for a hernia, lawyer currently serves as an Assistant United Alice Nkom said. States Attorney. The Judiciary Commit- “His family said he was a curse for tee voted in favor of advancing Levy’s them and that we should let him die,” nomination to the full Senate. she said. “Judith Levy is an accomplished and Mbede was arrested in March 2011, experienced legal professional who will and given a three-year sentence the fol- serve the people of Michigan, and the lowing month. United States, well,” said D’Arcy Kem- The AP adds: nitz, executive director of The LGBT Cameroon brings more cases against Bar. “As our country diversifies, it is suspected homosexuals than any other imperative that our judiciary reflect the African country, according to Human people, families and nation it is called Rights Watch. The rights group said in a to serve. Just as women, African-Ameri- March 2013 report that at least 28 people cans, Latinos and others have made our had been charged under the law in the judicial system stronger through their past three years. Maurice Tomlinson at Open Arms. For more on the church, see page 7. expertise and experiences, openly lesbi- Mbede developed the hernia while an, gay, bisexual and transgender judg- in prison. In July 2012 he was granted es and attorneys also ensure our courts provisional release on medical grounds, reflect our country. We now call on the according to Human Rights Watch, full Senate to vote on Levy’s nomination and went into hiding. An appeals court without delay.” upheld his conviction in December 2012. If confirmed, Levy would be the International human rights activists ninth openly lesbian or gay federal judge. have called on Cameroonian police to She previously served as Chief of the investigate Mbede’s death in light of Civil Rights Unit during her time as U.S. reports that he may have been barred Attorney, and was also a trial attorney from receiving medical treatment. for the United States Equal Employment Mbede had been declared a prisoner Opportunity Council. Her nomina- of conscience by Amnesty International. tion has received strong support from numerous organizations, including the T rans woman dares city American Bar Association, which has characterized her as “Unanimously Well councilman to “throw Qualified.” the first stone” at her Earlier this year, the nomination of another openly gay nominee, William By Ashlee Kelly on gaystarnews.com Thomas, was pulled following an objec- A Louisiana city council member tion by Senator Marco Rubio (R-FL). withdrew his proposal against a pro- Thomas, who was nominated by Presi- gay ordinance after a trans woman dent Obama in November 2012 to a seat challenged him to “throw the first T rans woman Elder Ken Martin and Rev. Elder Nancy Wilson with Rev. Tom Decker and David Zona. on the U.S. District Court for the South- ( continues page 12) 12 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

national M arriages start in and international England, Wales on From Our Readers March 29 ( Trans woman from page 11) The marriage equality law in England stone” against LGBTI people. and Wales will take effect on March 29, Councilman Ron Webb, the lone 2014, the BBC reports: “no” vote against an ordinance which Initially it was thought the first same- bans discrimination in housing and sex marriage in England and Wales employment against LGBTI people would not take place until the summer. in the city of Shreveport, La., had Couples wishing to be among the first to authored a proposal banning the new marry will need to give formal notice of policy on the grounds of “religious their intention to marry on 13 March. freedom”. It comes after the government’s con- Webb, known for his anti-gay troversial legislation on the issue received remarks, had previously said: “I’ve Royal Assent in July. The Conservative, worked with homosexuals before. I Labour and Liberal Democrat leader- don’t socialize with them. I don’t think, ships all backed the proposals. you know, we should.” RELATED: Last month the Scottish He added: “The Bible tells you Parliament passed the first reading of its homosexuals are an abomination.” marriage equality bill. The bill faces two Webb’s proposal faced a backlash more readings and royal assent is expect- from many in the LGBTI community ed to come in the spring. in Shreveport, with dozens of people arriving on 14 January to voice their Study says conservative opposition. However, one woman took things further. evangelicals have Pamela Raintree, a trans activist, highest divorce rate called out Webb for basing his anti- gay beliefs on Christian scripture, and According to a study to be published dared him to “throw the first stone” – in the American Journal Of Sociolo- going so far as to bring the stone with gy, “religiously conservative Protestants” her for his convenience. (Jesus told a divorce at a higher rate than the general mob ready to stone someone to death, population. JINGLE BALLS: K Mart’s holiday ad infuriated the rightwing publicity machine “One “Let him who is without sin cast the first Researchers discovered that higher Million Moms.” (See the Dec.-Jan. Empty Closet.) stone.”) divorce rates among conservative Protes- Quoting the bible, Raintree said: tants were tied to earlier marriages and “Leviticus 20:13 states, ‘If a man also lie childbearing – factors known to ramp up K Mart Jingle Balls ad no worse than Victoria’s with mankind as he lieth with a woman, divorce. Starting families earlier tends to Secrets; what’s the uproar? they shall surely put him to death.’ I stop young adults from pursuing more education and depresses their wages, put- To the Editor: brought the first stone, Mr Webb, in case that your Bible talk isn’t just a smoke- ting more strain on marriages, Univer- I don’t see what all the uproar is about the men in Joe Boxers. It’s no different than screen for personal prejudices.” sity of Texas at Austin professor Jennifer the Victoria Secrets ad with women in their panties and bras with their boobs half out. Within minutes, an embarrassed Glass said. My preference would be the guys in briefs than boxers doing their thing. But the study went a step further: Pete Fedele Webb withdrew his anti-gay proposal without vote. Glass and another researcher also dis- The Editor responds: The Right probably doesn’t approve of Victoria’s Secrets either. But it The video, showing Raintree’s brave covered that people living in areas with seems they REALLY can’t stand men being depicted in the way that women are. Also anti-gay lots of conservative Protestants were at ■ challenge to Webb, has since gone viral, ideologues are not exactly known for their sense of humor! with over 20,000 views on Youtube. higher risk of getting divorced, even february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 13 if they weren’t conservative Protestants NBC is already taking heat from themselves. activists groups like Queer Nation which County by county, for every 1 per- recently protested a talk by gay figure cent increase in the share of conserva- skater Johnny Weir, whom NBC has tive Protestants compared with mainline hired to provide commentary for the Protestants, the divorce rate increased Sochi Games. 0.02 percent, the study found. Glass NBC also recently promised, in a argued that community institutions in statement of support for Weir, that it such areas might encourage early mar- “will cover all newsworthy issues as they riage, affecting divorce rates for everyone are relevant to the Games,” including the who lives there. LGBT law. “Save that… for the next time you get Read more: http://www.towleroad. told that you are destroying traditional com/#ixzz2n0RrZQ9G marriage,” commented JoeMyGod.com. Putin’s latest anti-gay statements Vladimir Putin appeared on ABC’s H ouston mayor marries This Week in January to state that although gays molest children, etc., etc., longtime partner there will be no anti-gay purges in Sochi Houston Mayor Annise Parker mar- during the Olympics. ried her longtime partner Kathy Hub- The interview with George Stepha- bard in a sunset ceremony in Palm nopoulos wasn’t the only one Russian Springs, California on Jan. 16, the Hous- President Vladimir Putin gave over the ton Chronicle reports: weekend, and in an interview with Rus- The ceremony, held at sunset at a sian and foreign television stations he private home, was attended by a small offered more information about his views group of family and friends of the couple, on gay people. including Parker’s mother and Hubbard’s Houston Mayor Annise Parker married Kathy Hubbard on Jan. 16. Putin believes that “propaganda” can sister, according to a statement from turn a heterosexual child gay. He refused Parker’s office. that she wouldn’t marry until it was legal reports: to answer a question from the BBC on “This is a very happy day for us,” said in Texas, she changed her mind. It was The network announced it has hired whether he believes that people are born Parker, the first openly gay mayor of a reported in late December that she would New Yorker editor (and former Wash- gay or become gay. The Russian law, major U.S. city. “We have had to wait a marry in California. When Republicans ington Post Moscow bureau chief) David however, suggests that information about very long time to formalize our commit- expressed outrage, Parker suggested they Remnick to provide guest commentary homosexuality can influence a child’s sex- ment to each other. Kathy has been by “Get over it.” on the network’s air during its coverage ual orientation. my side for more than two decades, help- Read more: http://www.towleroad. of the Games. Remnick will contribute to He equated gays and pedophiles and ing to raise a family, nurture my political com/#ixzz2qfK3tbrr NBC’s coverage of the Opening Ceremo- said the law was aimed at banning propa- career and all of the other ups and downs ny and will offer commentary for NBC ganda of homosexuality and pedophilia, and life events that come with a commit- News in Sochi, the network said. suggesting that gays are more likely than ted relationship.” NBC will cover Russian “We are facing an Olympics that heterosexual males to abuse children. Tweeted Parker: anti-gay laws during have a number of issues around them — And, using more worrisome language, “I am privileged to now be the wife substantial, meaty, news issues,” NBC’s he suggested that Russia would benefit if of the woman I have loved for more than Olympics; Putin talks Olympics exec producer Jim Bell told the population were “cleansed” of gays. two decades. I couldn’t be happier. We trash again Sports Illustrated over the weekend. “For Making another favorite argument us to be able to have an opportunity to against homosexuality, Putin noted with said our vows today.” NBC has hired journalist David Rem- The vows were performed by Rev. address them with someone like David pride that Russia saw more births than nick to provide coverage of Russian poli- made perfect sense. We would be remiss deaths last year for the first time in two Paul Fromberg, a friend and the part- tics including fallout from the country’s ner of Parker’s political consultant Grant not to rely on some of the best and bright- decades. Population growth is vital for anti-gay laws during its upcoming Olym- est minds to help present this to our view- Russia’s development and “anything that Martin. pics broadcast from Sochi, Deadline Though Parker had previously said ers the right way.” gets in the way of that we should clean (NBC continues page 14) 14 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

national Health and international ( Nbc from page 13) up,” he said, using a word usually reserved Despite growing for military operations. And by the way, Russia loves Elton education, many John: “Millions of our people sincerely Americans still not love him despite his orientation.” Read more: http://www.towleroad. getting influenza vaccine com/#ixzz2qwxrJtzI By HCR Home Care HRC blasts Putin for lies Although federal, state, and county The Human Rights Campaign has offices continue to increase efforts pro- published a blistering reaction to the com- viding education and awareness about ments made by Vladimir Putin on the influenza, the statistics do not seem to be broadcast of ABC’s This Week. changing. Despite Healthy People 2020 “President Putin’s public interpretation Targets for Influenza vaccination cover- of the country’s anti-LGBT law is beyond age are 80 percent for six months to 64 comprehension,” said HRC President years of age and 90 percent for 65 years Chad Griffin. “This law was designed to and older, most people do not receive the do nothing less than secure second class vaccine. status for LGBT Russians and visitors. It This is particularly true in the high does nothing to protect children, but goes risk groups of elderly, pregnant women, great lengths to harm families.” and those with chronic illnesses. Putin told Stephanopoulos athletes Coverage for the 2011-2012 season who protest or wear a rainbow pin will not (September 2011 – June 2012) for adults be prosecuted under the law, noting there CeCe McDonald was freed Jan. 13. (age 18 and older) was 38.8 percent; is a small difference between protesting which is about 367,500 people total in the law and violating it. His statements today contradict those of government treating me and my friends. And instead B razilian youth was the United States. Among the elderly, of taking me directly to the ambulance, high risk group, of those age 65 years officials who last year said visitors are brutally tortured, not exempt from Russia’s repressive laws. they made me sit in the back of a squad and older, 64.9 percent received the vac- car in handcuffs while bleeding badly and murdered by gang cine and roughly 44,000 seniors die Under the law foreigners can not only be fined, but also face arrest and up to 15 in very bad pain.’ from flu and complications from the flu Activists across America, including By Joe Morgan on gaystarnews.com each year. Despite increased educational days in jail, followed by eventual depor- Police are on the hunt for a gang who tation. Kate Bornstein and Leslie Feinberg, have efforts; increased access through pharma- compared McDonald’s case to that of pulled a gay teen’s teeth out, tortured and cies, work places, and schools; and even Putin also compared the country’s murdered him in Brazil. anti-LGBT law with those of some U.S. the killing of Trayvon Martin, who was the 2009 H1N1 Pandemic; most seem to shot in an apparent act of self defense by Kaique Batista dos Santos, 16, was be avoiding the influenza vaccine. states, saying laws are still on the books found in Sao Paulo battered and bruised The Flu Can Be Prevented! criminalizing homosexuality. Stepha- George Zimmerman. Whilst it took months for Zimmer- with an iron bar still pierced in his leg. The low percentages of immunizations nopoulos promptly corrected the Russian It is alleged authorities originally President, explaining to him the Supreme man to be arrested, only to be found not indicate that there are barriers preventing guilty, McDonald was arrested almost believed the gay teen committed suicide. individuals from receiving vaccination. Court struck down those laws. His family fears he was targeted “Americans, and the citizens of the instantly and eventually accepted a plea One of the biggest barriers is the miscon- bargain. because of his sexuality and race. ceptions and misinformation about influ- world are against archaic and dangerous Batista dos Santos’ sister Tayna has laws that single out a group of people,” Supporters of McDonald include enza and its vaccine. actress Lauren Laverne, best known for said, “These thugs enjoy beating and tor- The flu can be prevented by getting Griffin added. “The blatant lie that gays turing with their bare hands and they are and lesbians are not discriminated at all her portrayal of a trans inmate in the hit the flu vaccine each year. You can get show “Orange Is The New Black”. pleased to take the lives of homosexuals. the flu vaccine at your physician’s office, in Russia only serves to undermine Putin’s “He had bruises to his head and was credibility around the globe.” Laverne is currently in the process of health care clinics, and many pharma- producing a documentary on McDonald’s probably kicked to death.” cies; and the vaccine is usually covered by Many observers fear that after the Batista dos Santos had attended a Olympics, anti-gay repression and vio- life, called “Free CeCe,” which is due for insurance. The vaccine offers protection release later this year. party at a gay club in downtown Sao against multiple strains of the virus. lence in Russia, supported strongly by the Paulo with friends when his phone and Orthodox Church and their violent allies - See more at: http://www.gaystarnews. You cannot get the flu from the flu com/article/trans-woman-cece-mcdon- wallet were stolen. vaccine! The viruses contained within the the neo-Nazi skinheads, will reach new At first, his friends thought he had left heights. ald-set-be-released-prison-ear- flu shot are inactivated or killed, so that ly050114#sthash.wQgOCjww.dpuf early because he had to go to work the they cannot cause an infection. As the next day. virus is made, flu vaccine manufacturers C eCe McDonald gets But when he didn’t come home and kill the virus and conduct tests to ensure B akery that refused didn’t show up for work, Batista dos San- the vaccine is safe and will not cause the early release from jail lesbian wedding cake tos’ mother and sister went looking for infection. By Ashlee Kelly on gaystarnews.com violated couple’s civil him for two days before he was discovered If a person develops the flu or flu like A Minneapolis trans woman who was on 12 January. symptoms after getting the vaccination, it imprisoned for manslaughter has been rights, Oregon says He was discovered around a mile from is usually because they have already been released early. Her supporters have long the stadium that will host the FIFA World exposed to the disease prior to receiving By Greg Hernandez on gaystarnews.com Cup opening ceremony in the summer. said that she acted in self defense. The civil rights of a lesbian couple the shot. It can take two weeks for the CeCe McDonald, who was found As the body was so disfigured, his vaccination to take full effect. If you have in Oregon were violated when a bak- family were only allowed to identify the guilty of second degree manslaughter, ery refused to make their wedding cake, been exposed during this time period, stabbed Dean Schmitz in an apparent case gay teen three days afterwards. your body may not have created all the according to a state investigation. The Department for Public Safety of self defense in June 2011. After plead- The Bureau of Labor and Industries antibodies it needs to successfully defeat ing guilty, she was sentenced to 41 months said it would not comment on the torture the infection. found that Sweet Cakes by Melissa had because the report is “confidential”. in prison. discriminated against Portland couple Flu viruses constantly change and a McDonald was freed on 13 January, Gay rights groups held a vigil to honor person’s immune protection from the vac- Rachel Cryer and Laurel Bowman. Both the gay teen, marching from Largo do just 19 months into her sentence. parties must now undergo settlement cinations can decline over time. So, it is Trans activists have always maintained Arrouche – a square in the city – to where important to get a flu vaccine every year talks. the body was found. McDonald had acted in self defense, after Co-owner Melissa Klein shared the for the best protection. The CDC and being attacked. federal government suggest getting the news on the bakery’s Facebook page: “We On the night of the stabbing, McDon- received papers from BOLI yesterday and M ethodist Church vaccine as soon as it is available. The flu ald and four of her friends were heading to vaccine usually becomes available in early they have made their decision that we charges another a grocery store in Minneapolis when they have apparently discriminated. From what fall, approximately in September. were confronted by Schmitz and others, minister with marrying Symptoms: we have gathered we now have to wait to who hurled racist and transphobic abuse find out what the fines will be within 60 gay son, partner • Sore throat at the group. • Aches & pains days.” A fight soon broke out, leaving Klein and her husband, Aaron, had The United Methodist Church will • Fever McDonald injured and Schmitz killed by try a second minister for performing the Prevention: cited religious reasons for refusing to a stab wound to the chest. make the cake. They had stated on Face- marriage of a gay son. • Get Vaccinated In her blog, McDonald maintains she The Reverend Thomas Ogletree will • Cover your cough & sneeze book that “we strongly believe that when acted in self defense, saying: ‘Currently, I a man and woman come together to be go on trial on March 10 for violating • Wash your hands am in a men’s state prison for the death church law, which bans clergy from per- Protect your family, friends, and co- joined as one, it is truly one of the most of someone I accidentally stabbed in the special days of their lives.” forming weddings for same sex couples. workers by getting vaccinated this flu act of defending myself... After being Last December, Reverend Frank season! It was last January that Aaron Klein called everything from faggots to niggers, refused to take the order. In September, Schaefer was defrocked after performing tempers escalated and I was caught in they closed up shop and began working a marriage for his gay son. between the madness. out of their home. Ogletree is a theologian, a former Yale ‘When the police arrived it wasn’t hard - See more at: http://www.gaystarnews. Divinity School dean and a retired elder to for them to assume who the aggressors com/article/state-finds-oregon-bak- in the church’s New York district. Some were — surely, for them, it had to have ery-discriminated-refusing-make-wed- clergy filed a complaint against him after been the group of black kids who started ding-cake-lesbians200114#sthash. the wedding announcement appeared in all this drama. At least that was the feel- aUkxRRDO.dpuf the New York Times. ing I was receiving by the way they were february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 15

Six couples sue Florida for right to marry On Jan. 21, six same-sex couples and Equality Florida Institute filed a lawsuit Opinion in Florida state court in Miami seeking the freedom to marry. The lawsuit argues that Florida’s laws T oo close to home… ones who lose. Florida loses too. riages — one very positive step forward barring same-sex couples from marriage Since Florida does not recognize our toward equality in our nation. violate the United States Constitution by By Brandon L. Hensler, M.S., APR love, we are forced to travel to a state that But, Florida, we love you too much denying them the legal protections and Florida has an unfortunate history of does, spending countless hours research- to give up on you. As appealing as Bos- equal dignity that having the freedom to being behind the eight ball on contempo- ing the best venues, caterers, bartenders ton, Chicago, San Diego and the nation’s marry provides. rary social issues. But never before has it and the perfect officiant, everything it capital may be to us, we choose to stay and The couples are from Miami and the so deeply and personally affected me. takes — including the tens of thousands work toward a better future for the family surrounding area. Four of the couples are Proponents of inequality have torn of dollars — to make our special day the we are building. I am not going to sugar raising children, and another couple has apart the seams of our nation since its best it can be. To make it “perfectly us.” coat it though. It is acutely painful that an adult child and two grandchildren. founding, creating a world with unequal Multiply that by the many other same- the place that I am generally proud to call The couples are Catherina Pareto and classes of people. Today, the deafening sex couples that are fleeing Florida to get home, a place for which I have so much Karla Arguello; Dr. Juan Carlos Rodri- roar of inaction by the Florida Legislature married, taking countless dollars and jobs love, has no love for my fiancé and me. guez and David Price; Vanessa and Mel- to legalize marriage between same-sex away to other states, and it becomes clear This tale is not about being a demo- anie Alenier; Todd and Jeff Delmay; couples is akin to this state’s previous mis- to see that Florida is the real loser in this crat or a republican, an independent or tea Summer Greene and Pamela Faerber and steps when it comes to treating humans scenario. But this tale is not solely about party member, a conservative or a liberal, Don Price Johnston and Jorge Isaias Diaz. with a sun-kissed touch of humanity, economics either. or even what most Americans are — mid- They are represented by the law firm Carl- but this time — today — the fight has These archaic and unpopular postures dle of the road. It is about being human ton Fields Jorden Burt, attorney Elizabeth reached my front door step. by an out-of-touch legislature negatively and demonstrating kindness and toler- F. Schwartz, attorney Mary B. Meeks and On June 21, 2013, my now-fiancé and impact our great state’s image without ance toward others. It is about recognizing the National Center for Lesbian Rights I became engaged, ushering in a tidal doubt. States like Florida that continue the reality that our relationships exist and (NCLR). wave of untroubled emotions, felicitations to be stomach-wrenchingly short sighted our love and commitment are real and Said Pareto: “Florida is our home, it is from our families, friends and coworkers on many public policies unintentional- deserving of the same recognition as those where we are raising our child, and where and of course, the daunting task of plan- ly provoke educated professionals to do of different-sex married couples. we want to get married. Karla and I wish ning our wedding. We cannot wait to more than go out of state to marry. Many There is no way around it. I am irate. for our family the same things that other celebrate our devotion to one another — understandably move elsewhere without I am hurt. Millions of Americans are. But families want. We want to build our lives our monogamy and unwavering mutual looking back, and more still never move right here and right now, it cannot be about together, provide a safe and caring home support — and stand before our closest here to begin with. And that includes any of that for me either, lest I allow the for our child, and share in the responsibil- relatives and friends to share our love and major corporations that will not consider Florida Legislature to rob us of the joy of ities and protections of marriage.” life-long commitment to the good, the relocating to the Sunshine State with this celebrating our love and getting married. Added Greene: “As Pam and I get bad and even the inevitable ugly. dark veil of intolerance overshadowing us. Instead, we are looking at New York, older, it worries me that we do not have Both my fiancé and I are native Florid- The Florida Legislature has the chance to Illinois, Massachusetts, California, D.C., the legal protections that marriage pro- ians. He has spent his entire life in Flor- do the right thing for its people before the and even Iowa to find the perfect place vides in case one of us becomes ill or dies. ida, and with the exception of my time courts force it to catch up with the rest of to get married in front of our loved ones. Getting married in Florida will provide us living in Ohio, Argentina and Bolivia, I the country. This much is inevitable. And lately, my eyes are wandering towards with those important protections and it have spent most of my life in South Flori- Even the U.S. Military, frequently one of the most recent states to catch up will allow us to celebrate that joyous occa- da. In fact, we are rooted mere miles from considered a sign of changing times if with the right side of history… sion with all our family and friends, just the hospital where I was born and my not a bellwether, has embraced equal- …Aloha! as other couples can.” mother worked as a nurse in the 1970s. ity by repealing the ludicrous Don’t Ask Brandon L. Hensler, M.S., APR, a Stated Equality Florida Institute Chief Unfortunately, we will not be able to get Don’t Tell policy, and by beginning to resident of Hollywood, FL, is the former Executive Officer Nadine Smith: “Today married here. It is a shame that we will extend benefits to same-sex partnerships director of communications for the ACLU the majority of Floridians stand with us as have to travel a great distance to get mar- that different sex couples have long taken of Florida and holds a master’s of science in we take this historic step toward marriage ried. But this is not just a tale of inequal- for granted. In fact, the Department of conflict analysis and resolution from Nova (F lorida continues page 16) ity and hurt feelings. We are not the only Defense now recognizes all same-sex mar- Southeastern University. ■ 16 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

their 15-month-old son. which the state is currently denying us.” saying same-sex couples have a due-process national Dr. Juan Carlos Rodriguez and David Summer Greene and Pamela Faerber right to marry. Younger people by and and international Price have been together for nearly 18 have been together for 25 years. Summer large take a more libertarian view of same- years. Juan Carlos is a physician specializ- is a real estate agent. Pamela is a portrait sex relationships, and that is what has ing in pulmonary medicine. David is the artist. Summer and Pamela raised Pamela’s fueled the nation’s shift since Utah passed ( Florida from page 15) practice manager for Juan Carlos’s medi- daughter from a prior marriage and now its ban in 2004. equality in the Sunshine State. These cou- cal practice. They have twins, a boy and a have two grandchildren, ages 10 and 17. There are 32 states with laws still in ples have been embraced by their families girl, who are three years old Don Price Johnston and Jorge Isaias effect banning gay marriage, but only one and communities, but every day Florida Said Juan Carlos: “David and I are Diaz have been in a committed relation- state has passed such a law since 2006. laws are denying them the protections and devoted to our children. We are a family ship for a year and recently got engaged. Since that time seven state legislatures dignity that every family deserves. These in every way, except that Florida will not Don is an office manager at a Miami law have passed laws to allow same-sex mar- harmful laws are outdated and out of step. allow us to marry. Being a doctor, I see firm, and Jorge is a paralegal at a Miami riage, and three more states did so through It is time for all families in our state to people and families in crisis all the time. law firm. popular vote. Court decisions have struck have full equality under the law.” In those situations, family and the legal Said Jorge: “Both Don and I have very down the laws in another seven states, Attorney Cristina Alonso of Carl- protections that come with it are critical. strong ties to Florida and cannot imagine including Utah. One of those states is ton Fields Jorden Burt added, “Courts It pains David and me to be denied a basic getting married anywhere else. If we could California, where state officials stopped throughout the country are recognizing safety net of legal protections.” marry, we would be legally recognized as a defending their same-sex marriage ban that this is an issue of basic dignity and Vanessa and Melanie Alenier have been family and have all the same legal protec- when it became obvious where the future fundamental fairness. We look forward to together for eight years. Vanessa is the tions as others.” lies. Utah’s ban passed with 66 percent the day when our clients can celebrate and assistant general manager of a national of voters approving it, but it’s a legitimate protect their relationships by getting mar- trade show and special event service pro- Editorial of the month: question whether it would pass today ried in their home state in front of family vider. Melanie is an insurance agent. They if another election were held. Even the and friends.” have a 5-year-old son together. Utah marriage equality LDS Church has gone from actively par- Said attorney Elizabeth F. Schwartz: Said Vanessa: “Melanie and I have A January editorial from the editors of ticipating in the marriage wars to simply “As someone who has spent nearly two worked so hard to build and protect our the Salt Lake Tribune: explaining its own beliefs and practices. decades helping same-sex couples and family, but nothing can come close to The tide has turned. It’s time for Utah Same-sex attraction, far from being ■ their families achieve some measure of matching the protections that marriage unnatural, has been around since the to turn with it. legal protection under Florida law, which provides. Our family is in need of those dawn of time, and in recent decades main- gives us very few tools, I know too well protections just like other families. We stream America has come to accept it as just how difficult the process can be and want our son to understand that his fam- something other than deviant. The Ameri- how much vulnerability these couples ily is secure and just as respected as any can Psychiatric Association has considered face. The protections we are able to cobble other family part of our community here homosexuality a normal sexual variation, together without marriage pale in com- in Florida.” not a mental disorder, since 1973. The parison to the comprehensive security Todd and Jeff Delmay have been Supreme Court in 2003 made same-sex provided by marriage recognized not just together for 11 years. Todd and Jeff own sexual activity legal in every state, and by the federal government but by the State and operate Delmay and Partners, a com- then last June the court took that step of of Florida.” pany that provides housing services for NCLR Legal Director Shannon Mint- large events. They have one son, who is er added: “The law should support fami- three years old. lies, not make it harder for committed Said Jeff: “Like all parents, mak- couples to support one another and pro- ing sure that our son is safe and secure is tect their children. Barring same-sex cou- our top priority. Unfortunately, because ples from marriage causes great harms to the State of Florida will not allow us to their families and children while helping get married we cannot provide the level no one.” of protections that opposite-sex married About the Plaintiffs couples are able to give to their children. Catherina Pareto and Karla Arguello Beyond those critical protections, we want Wayo to g have been together for 14 years. Catherina the opportunity to celebrate our love and owns and operates a financial planning commitment to one another in a wedding firm. Karla is a stay-at-home mother to ceremony and have it mean something, 2013 designation number The United Way...... 1135 it benefits the Gay Alliance! Thank you

Glenn Zermeño, LCSW Individual, Couple & Group Psychotherapy

LGBTQ Concerns, Youth & Adolescents, HIV/AIDS, Relationships, Dealing with Conflict, Effective Communication, Anxiety, Depression, Body Image, Self-Esteem 25 Canterbury Road, Suite 311 • Rochester, New York 14607 Phone: 917-309-7508 • Email: [email protected] february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 17

plate. We’re on the way to creating that senior community that wouldn’t have the I ntroducing a new feature: safe and dignified place for our seniors to understanding and acceptance of a feisty, live, regardless of financial needs. outrageous gay man. He relishes his life at “This continues to be a pioneering Spirit on Lake.” project, but what we have learned thus When asked how the housing project far is that we need to share this project came about, Barbara commented, “This with the community and tell seniors that has been a lengthy and challenging roller- not only can they come home, but we can coaster ride over EIGHT years to develop show them the way, by delivering the ser- this project. It started because Spirit of the LGBTQ Living vices they deserve.” Lakes United Church of Christ in Minne- Read more at http://www.bileri- apolis, the first GLBT church in a major co.com/2013/11/entering_the_home_ Christian denomination, decided that it stretch_on_senior_housing_projec. had a valuable piece of real estate on Lake php#Ucg7r6G9hFKQEcUw.99 Street and 13th Avenue S. in Minneapolis. Minneapolis: Spirit on Lake “Developers were knocking on our In Minneapolis, Barbara Satin, doors asking us to sell and move to the a 79-year-old transgender activist, is suburbs. We decided that we owed more described as “the matriarch of Spirit on than that to the GLBT community and Lake,” the 46-unit affordable housing our neighbors. The neighborhood wanted complex, although she does not actually residential rather than more commercial live there. development. They wanted bodies on the Every unit at Spirit on Lake is occu- street that would patronize the existing pied, and about three-quarters of the resi- Hispanic mercados and Somali businesses dents are LGBTQ seniors. There are also that were the heart of the residential com- many Somali families in residence and the munity. two groups seem to be getting along. “At the urging of myself and other Rainbow flags hang from some bal- members of GLBT Generations, an orga- conies and a stairwell along one corner nization that had its roots in the church of the building displays rainbow-colored community and was focused on helping windows. GLBT people age with respect and secu- Barbara Satin told The Empty Closet, rity, the church joined with a local non- “You asked about how people feel about profit developer, PRG, to build an GLBT living at Spirit on Lake. I can give you the elder housing cooperative; Spirit of the comments I have received and the com- Lakes congregation would move off of the ments I have heard as people were inter- property while construction took place viewed locally by media. I don’t live there but would return and purchase the first Barbara Satin (left) with a friend at Spirit on Lake in Minneapolis. since I have too much income to qualify floor space for our new church. for affordable rental. “We were well underway with our T his month: LGBTQ “Scott, who was one of the first per- plans and funding when the housing mar- affordable senior apartments in Philadel- sons in line the day applications were ket collapsed. We had 75 percent of the senior housing in phia, the John C. Anderson Apartments taken for Spirit on Lake, loves his apart- 41 units spoken for but with the decline Philadelphia and (JCAA). The $19.5-million construction ment and loves being in an environment in housing values many of the potential Minneapolis project might have gone up in record time which is so supportive and welcoming. residents lost the equity in their homes, with record support from elected officials, He lives on the fourth floor overlooking which was going to be their payment for By Susan Jordan community and governmental depart- busy Lake Street and enjoys the hustle entry into the coop. Safe and affordable housing for ments, but in all that rush there was an and bustle that he can see and hear from “The project looked doomed but PRG LGBTQ seniors is becoming a major important lesson that was learned along his balcony. said it could still work and in collabora- issue, as many aging baby boomers are the way. Segal wrote, “Note […] that word “Lucretia is a former nun and lived tion with Generations and the Church, forced into the closet in rehabs, assisted ‘affordable.’ in an affordable rental facility in St. Paul the project was restructured as affordable living, nursing homes and other housing “Getting to this point has been for with her partner who is now deceased. She rental. Many of the people who had want- for elders. us a long road that included numerous felt very threatened in her former home; ed to live in the cooperative project didn’t Earl Collom wrote on The Advocate studies of our community, from which there was verbal harassment and an atmo- have the financial resources to qualify - on Dec. 27, “A recent visit with a 68-year- we realized the need for affordable hous- sphere of tension because people knew but they still wanted the safety and social old terminally ill client of Visiting Nurse ing for our seniors. But what we were not that she was a lesbian. She had decided to environment that was part of the original Service of New York Hospice and Pal- prepared for was how isolated and in the move when I met her and told her about concept. This became our target market. liative Care crystallized this conundrum. closet many of those who needed this Spirit on Lake; she used to be a member “We went back to the funders -- The client, who is gay, had walls and building really are. of our church community and thought including the State of Minnesota, Henne- shelves filled with photos he had taken “How many of us can truly say we the project had died. She applied and pin County and the City of Minneapolis over his lifetime of people, places, friends, have knowledge of the financial needs in was accepted and feels so free of fear and -- and successfully persuaded them that and travel. our community? Better yet, how many of tension. She has become one of the most our new focus was good for the com- “On the next visit to discuss end-of-life us know people in our community who active members of the residents’ council munity. The new concept would actu- care, many of the pictures had been taken make less than the average income? Before and involved with most of the activities ally provide 46 units -- rather than the down. When asked why he removed so this project, I can assure you that, while I that take place in the building. 41 planned in the cooperative model. many images from his life’s adventures, knew there was a need, I didn’t know the “Harvey is a well known member of Additionally, money was found to pro- he simply replied, ‘I didn’t want to offend extent of the problems.” the Twin Cities gay community. He used vide housing and support services for five anyone.’ For instance, organizers suddenly dis- to own a gay bookstore, Brothers Touch, units designated for people who had been “…With the number of self-identified covered an approved applicant who, once and was an out gay man when it was dif- homeless over the past five years. This LGBT adults age 65 or older expected approved, had no knowledge on how to ficult to do that. He became concerned social justice thrust added even more to double by 2030 — from 1.5 million move her government-living voucher from about what was going to happen to him- meaning to the new project direction. to 3 million, according to the National where she currently lived (not an LGBT- self when he was too old to continue to “By the fall of 2012 we had complet- Resource Center on LGBT Aging — the friendly place) and had no idea whom to live in his home. He heard about Spirit on ed most of the funding work and were time has never been more urgent to dis- contact. Lake and decided that it would be a good ready to begin letting contracts when we cuss this silent challenge… Segal wrote, “We assumed that our place to live out his days rather than in a were told that there was $150,000 worth “LGBT seniors are at a greater risk residents would have that knowledge. of disability and mental distress than Here’s what we discovered: LGBT people their heterosexual counterparts, and face with limited incomes are not out about many barriers to accessing care, notes The their financial hardships to our communi- Aging and Health Report: Disparities and ty, and LGBT people who have not lived Resilience among Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, within the gayborhood or LGBT ghetto and Transgender Older Adults, a compre- are afraid to contact their social-services hensive 2011 survey conducted in part- representative and out themselves. Some nership with Services and Advocacy for just live where they are no matter the con- GLBT Elders and funded by the National dition or treatment rather than come out, Institutes of Health and the National sometimes for fear that a bureaucrat will Institute on Aging. More than 20 percent lecture them or toss them off the program. of LGBT older adults surveyed in that “We’ve seen and heard this before, report said they had not come out about but seniors are taken advantage of, and their sexual orientation or gender identity that includes LGBT seniors. The point to their primary physician.” is, some LGBT people are afraid to out There are still very few LGBTQ- themselves to non-gay bureaucratic gov- friendly housing complexes for elders. ernment officials, or out themselves as Triangle Square opened in West Holly- income-challenged to their own commu- wood, Calif., in 2007, and Minneapolis’s nity. Additionally, they feel neither will Spirit on Lake is discussed below. Projects appreciate their needs since no one has, or in Chicago and Philadelphia are slated to the level of understanding has been limit- open in 2014. ed until this point. They have major fears Philadelphia’s senior housing proj- and mistrust. ect has run into unexpected problems “Here’s the silver lining: our HIV/ and lessons learned AIDS and health organizations already Mark Segal wrote last fall on The Bile- have that knowledge, and since they are rico Project about the new LGBT-friendly partnering with us, they stepped up to the The John C. Anderson Apartments in Philadelphia. 18 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

Spirit on Lake, Minneapolis. of remediation work that had to be done that there could be a strong sense of com- on contaminated soil. That was not in an munity within the project and it would be already constricted budget. The project more than just an apartment complex of Strengthening access to looked like it was dead since we were fac- individuals living under one roof but not ing some decisions deadlines and didn’t interacting with each other. community living for people with have the resources to get over this hurdle. “By August of 2013 construction was disabilities and older adults “That’s when Spirit of the Lakes nearly done and the first occupants moved Church came through in a really big in on September 1. There was a commu- By Kathleen Sebelius, Secretary, Department of Health and Human Services way. Since the beginning of the proj- nity open house in October so that public Every person should have a chance to live, work, and thrive as a part of their ect, our church building was giving us officials, funders and community leaders local community. The Obama administration has worked to create more oppor- major problems, but we thought we could could see the beautiful new building and tunities for people with disabilities and older adults to access the benefits of com- weather them until the building was meet the residents.” munity living -- like living in a place of their own choosing with people they care underway and we could move to another How should people here in Rochester about, having a job, and participating in community life. site. Then with construction finished we go about creating LGBTQ senior hous- At the Department of Health and Human Services, we recognize that Medic- could move into our new church. ing? Barbara said, “I would suggest that aid-funded home and community-based services are a critical part of our efforts to “The old building couldn’t wait out anyone looking to do housing for special- help people with disabilities and older adults live healthy and meaningful lives in the extended development process we were ized communities find a non-profit part- the community. That is why I am pleased to share with you final rules that help experiencing and we had to find another ner (as we did with PRG) who can lead more eligible Americans have full access to the benefits of community living and congregation to worship with. Such a you through the labyrinth of regulations receive services in the most integrated setting. The rule clearly defines the qualities group was Minnehaha United Church that govern housing. One of the most dif- of home and community-based settings so that these Medicaid programs can serve of Christ, which was facing substantial ficult issues to understand is that the Fair as an alternative to institutional care for those who choose them. financial difficulties and would have to Housing Laws will not let you discrimi- The rule will help people like Marisa, a 29-year-old woman who uses a power close unless they found another church to nate against -- nor let you discriminate in wheelchair and requires assistance with nearly all her physical needs. Marisa used connect with. Spirit of the Lakes began favor -- of a particular group of people. So to rely on her mother to provide this daily care, and her independence in the com- worshipping with Minnehaha and over doing housing for people in transition is a munity was limited. Through Medicaid-funded home and community-based the months together it became evident wonderful goal but you will come smack services, Marisa now lives more independently and is able to do things such as vol- that the two cultures were a great mix. up against housing law, which says ‘no’. unteering and completing college. The two congregations decided to merge “We are the second affordable hous- The rule makes clear that home and community-based services should support and became Living Table United Church ing project in the nation that is focused the person’s choices for participation in the broader community, just as Marisa’s of Christ. on LGBT seniors -- but our residential services do. The final rule is a result of robust input from the public and a wide “Now back to the funding crisis for population is 75 percent GLBT and 25 range of stakeholders, states, as well as strong collaboration across multiple federal the housing project. When Living Table percent other. Triangle Square in LA is agencies. I look forward to continuing this successful, collaborative approach as we members heard of the crisis that might the first such project and they have been implement the rule. mean the end of this community dream, around for seven years -- they are 80 per- As we mark the 15th anniversary of the Supreme Court’s Olmstead decision this they gathered together and approved a cent GLBT and 20 percent other. year, I am proud of the progress we have made to strengthen the community living gift to the project of $150,000 from the “You can discriminate on the basis of opportunities for people with disabilities and older Americans. proceeds of the sale of the old Spirit of the age -- but only as long as you have a proj- For more information about the rule, see http://www.hhs.gov/news/ Lakes site. The only obligation the church ect that is funded by money that is des- press/2014pres/01/20140110a.html ■ put on the money was that the building ignated for senior housing only -- that’s managers establish a residents council so difficult to find and getting harder.”

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tal spirits. Since berdaches knew what it H istory was like to be both a man and a woman, they were also looked to for advice on rela- Corner Shoulders to Stand On tionships. A Monthly Newspaper of the Gay The roots of today’s homosexuality, Alliance of the Genesee Valley, 812 Brown transgender and other gender identities St. at West Main St., Rochester, NY are deeply rooted in the archetypal imag- 14611: February, 1974. (who had almost complete power in their es of upstate New York Native American GAY ALLIANCE MEETING TM selection), Iroquois sachemships were usu- men and women. European settlers would SCHEDULE ally held for life. Sachems who did not do have become aware of this “Two Spirit” SUN 3 FEB: Business Meeting/Gay the right thing, however, were “de-horned” culture very early in their explorations. Town Meeting by the clan mothers, who had final say. Whether accepted or not, homosexuality SUN 10 FEB: How To Be Gay, Gray In terms of liberation, it is not difficult and transgenderism are identifiable from And Happy. The art of growing older to make the jump from a matriarchal soci- the beginning of Native American history gracefully and making the most of it. ety in which women had power and were in New York. This history is not necessar- SUN 17 FEB: Child Custody For Gay equal to if not more important than men, ily known by current generations influ- Parents. Attorney Louis Gould speaks on to Susan B. Anthony who would raise enced by centuries of Christianity. But legal implications for natural, single, and the standard for a woman’s right to vote. these roots of tolerance of homosexuality adoptive parents. Joint meeting with Gay Rochester is saturated with the energy, in Upstate NY had a significant impact Revolution of Women. spirit and overwhelming history of lib- on our culture. SUN 24 FEB: Gay Bingo/Coffee eration -- women’s rights, civil rights, gay Gay liberation, as a fact if not a “con- House Prizes, goodies. rights – and has deep roots in Native lib- cept,” was accepted in most Native Ameri- ROCHESTER NY GAY GROUPS eration and equality. can cultures. With European influence INCLUDE: Within Native American matriarchal and the growth of a new nation, gay liber- GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GEN- societies, there have always been men and ation was placed on the back burner as our ESEE VALLEY (GAGV) meets at 7:30 women who were identified in some tra- more basic needs for survival and growth pm Sundays, 812 Brown Street (rear). Box ditions as “Two-Spirit.” Before the late as a nation took precedence, and as Euro- 4252. Rochester, NY 14611. (716) 436- twentieth century, the term “berdache” pean influence increasingly condemned 7670. was widely used by anthropologists as a homosexuality. UNIVERSITY OP ROCHESTER generic term to indicate “two-spirit” indi- However, the seeds were planted in the GAY LIBERATION FRONT (GLF), viduals; however, this term has become energy, spirit and life of those homosexual 201 Todd Union, Box 6913, River Cam- Shoulders to Stand On: considered increasingly outdated and and transgender Native Americans who pus, Rochester, NY 14627 (716) 275- Gay liberation, part 1 offensive. lived in the Rochester area. These were 6181. Meetings. Mondays, 7:30 pm as Among many North American groups, passed down to future generations of all announced In Campus Times. By Evelyn Bailey berdaches represented a gender intermedi- Americans. We cannot discount the influ- GAY REVOLUTION OF WOMEN Over the course of this year, Shoulders ate between male and female (Calen- ence of Rochester’s ancient Native Ameri- (GRoW) meets several times a month. To Stand On would like to focus on the der and Kochems, 1983; Jacobs, 1968). can culture on the generations to follow. Office on 2nd floor, Genesee Co-op, early roots of “gay liberation” in the Roch- A berdache is a person who adopts the The Rochester community has supported 713 Monroe Ave, is staffed weeknights ester area of Upstate New York. dress or occupation or behavior (or any and continues to support diversity, inclu- 7-9pm. Telephone (315) 244-9030. Mall: It is difficult to capture the spirit of combination thereof) of members of the sion and an openness to difference that Box 8594, Thurston Station, Rochester, Rochester’s earliest pioneers in the pursuit opposite sex, thereby acquiring a distinct nurtures creativity and innovation. NY 14627 of individual freedom and societal accep- gender status. The member of a particular Shoulders to Stand On asks that you GAYS FOR POLITICAL ACTION tance of diversity. Today Rochester is very culture “became” a berdache in varying take some time to consider these roots (GPA) PO Box 2823 Rochester, NY different from its pre-Stonewall, pre-revo- ways, some at a young age and others at of gay liberation, to understand the 14626 meets Thursdays, 8:30 pm at 812 lutionary times. The journey begins at the a later stage in life, possibly following life norm of life they projected for future Brown Street (rear). ■ beginning of time with an unquenchable as a warrior, “when they were no longer generations, and to celebrate the still- desire for freedom, acceptance, and a bet- capable of fighting effectively”. vibrant Native American culture that ter life for all. The berdache gender was mostly has provided both a profound influence Here in the beginning – thousands assumed by males. There were female to on U.S. democracy and a strong foun- of years ago -- were the Native Ameri- male berdaches (“Amazons”) but male to dation for opening the Closet Door! ■ can Upstate NY nations. The first idea of female berdaches seem to have been more “liberation” comes out of the matriarchal common. As many as 113 different tribes society of the Iroquois (Haudenosaunee), recognized the berdache gender for males, indigenous to Upstate New York. and female berdaches were reported in at The Iroquois were (and are) among the least 30 tribes. Individual male to female most important groups in North Ameri- berdaches ran the gamut from occasional can history. They had a matrilineal social crossdressers to people who “lived full structure -- the women owned all prop- time”. There are stories of berdaches who erty and determined kinship. There were would switch back and forth between three clans, turtle, bear, and wolf -- each male and female. They were accepted and headed by the clan mother, which is still honored but also considered to be some- the case today. The Seneca (Onondowa- what eccentric. ga), however, were like the Huron tribes The berdache did not typically adopt and had eight clans (the five additional all the roles of the opposite sex. The cul- being the crane, snipe, hawk, beaver, and ture of each society in which the berdache deer). After marriage, a man moved into was found defined exactly which of the his wife’s longhouse, and their children traditional roles of each gender were to became members of her clan. be adopted by the berdache. (Davis & The Iroquois League was formed prior Whitten, 1987, p. 84) In some tribes the to any contact with European explorers berdache was expected to behave hetero- and settlements. Rather than learning sexually, in others bisexually, homosexu- political sophistication from Europeans, ally or asexually. Europeans learned about liberation and In most Native American cultures ber- equality from the Iroquois, and the daches were respected, fully integrated League, with its elaborate system of into society, and had a high status. Gener- checks, balances, and supreme law, influ- ally berdaches were associated with good enced the American Articles of Confed- luck; they were considered to be lucky eration and Constitution. people, not because of their alternate gen- The Iroquois were farmers and hunt- der but because good things seemed to ers whose leaders were chosen by their happen to them. In tribes that had trade women. Founded by the Peacemaker and and economic activity berdaches were the Mother of Nations to maintain peace considered to be good in business. and resolve disputes between its members, Berdaches were also often associated the League’s primary law was and is the with shamanism, or contact with the spirit Kainerekowa, the Great Law of Peace, world. Shamans are very common, prob- an oral history that describes the politi- ably universal, in tribal cultures. They cal relationship between the Five Nations are people who contact or enter the spirit [six, in 1722, when the Tuscarora from the world, usually after going into a trance Carolinas joined as a sort of “junior mem- state, and are involved in healing peo- ber” (O’Brien 1989:18)]. The Law simply ple, both physically and psychologically. states Iroquois should not kill each other. Not all berdaches were shamans and not A long civil war between the nations was all shamans were berdaches, but ber- Celebrating Diversity and Love ended when the Peacemaker and Mother daches were regarded as making especially of Nations brought the warring groups skilled shamans. This is because they were Rev. Nancy Kasper together to bury their weapons under the thought to be skillful at crossing bound- White Pine, the sacred Tree of Peace. aries, gender as well as spiritual. In most Celebrant ~ Spiritual Counselor ~ Healer The League’s organization was pre- cultures around the world that accepted scribed by a written constitution. The transgenderism, transgender persons were Wedding, Union & Passage Services council was composed of 50 male sachems often connected with religion and spiri- known variously as lords, or peace chiefs. tuality and were seen as having a special 315~587~9349 • [email protected] Nominated by the tribal clan mothers relationship with ancestral and/or elemen- 22 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

with us. announcing his unequivocal support for “My son better talk to me like a man marriage equality. and not in a gay voice or I’ll pull out a Roberts has overcome a lot – in 2007, knife and stab [him] to death,” Tracy she was diagnosed with breast cancer and Columnists Morgan, comedian and former actor on in 2012 with myelodysplastic syndrome NBC’s 30 Rock, told his audience at the (MDS), a disease of the bone marrow. Ryman Auditorium in 2011. And now black homophobia grips her. The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers When CNN’s Don Lemon came out What Murphy and others also miss are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay he told Joy Behar on her HLN show: “In in their condemnation of the Obam- the black community they think you can as’ perceived gratuitous applaud of Rob- Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. pray the gay away.” erts’ coming out announcement is how So, whenever there’s an opportunity to the intersectionality of white queer rac- applaud and/or celebrate a person’s – espe- ism, elitism and sexism not only framed G rowing Up predecessors, wander the theater and it cially a high profile celeb, athlete or mega the legislations Obama signed on behalf True Love/Gay Shame was a contest among the loyal patrons to star – coming out moment, it helps loosen of LGBTI civil rights, but how it also see who could scoop her up. Once I lost a black homophobia’s persistent sharp teeth shaped which LGBTI demographic group By Eric Bellmann tug of war with a determined woman who buried in our collective flesh and hold on would most benefit. Consequently, this is Spike is dead. brought along treats to seduce Princess the community. another factor feeding and fueling black Death, inevitable, into her lap. I was furious. Black high profile celebs’ public com- homophobia that doesn’t exempt Roberts feared or antici- The theater took a thoughtful period ing out events correct and heal, if for only because of her statute or interracial rela- pated, is never wel- of time to find a new house cat. Her name a moment, a community’s irrational and tionship. come. The news is Sue. She is not young. She is hefty and persistent fear, shame, taboo, and igno- Sue O’Connell, a white lesbian and could not have has only one eye and gives, so far, no evi- rance about the wide spectrum of human editor and publisher of BayWindows, gets come at a worse dence of any interest in being a lap cat. sexuality even found among people of why Roberts’ coming out moment war- time, between She watches from the stairs or curls up in African descent. ranted high praise. Christmas and real or feigned sleep. Winning over Sue And we had one such moment with In her spot on op-ed titled “The harsh New Year’s. Twenty-one is too brief in will be a hard sell, that’s for sure. But one of America’s beloved newscasters. lesson of Robin Roberts’ coming out” human years, rather remarkable for an the other night as I was leaving the the- Good Morning America co-anchor O’Connell understands how the intersec- animal, a cat. ater Sue was in the box office doorway, Robin Roberts just recently came out of tionality of not only white queer racism, Ritchie called me. Spike was stag- perhaps glad to see the annoying patrons her “open” closet, using a Facebook post elitism and sexism play in Roberts dif- gering, something wrong with his leg, depart. She had a rubber band in her to publicly announce what we all knew. ficult struggle to come out, but how the his balance was off, clearly a neurologi- mouth. I tugged at it. Sue played with me! The Obamas, both Barack and complexities of African American com- cal problem. Richie said Spike just kind There is always hope. Michelle, congratulated Roberts with munity, religion and culture also make of leaned against the wall as he headed Well, I did have a cat of my own as a Michelle gleefully tweeting: “I am so Roberts’ coming out moment an Hercule- towards his litter box. First there was a child. I could never coax her into my bed happy for you and Amber! You continue an feat most definitely worthy of personal consultation with the vet, then shortly early in the morning when she prowled to make us all proud.” shout-outs from the Obamas. after a return visit for euthanasia. through my bedroom. I was too young, While many Americans across the “Challenges of class – of race and gen- To listen to a dear friend’s howls on too naïve to understand she was signing country felt the way the Obamas did der – are deeply entrenched obstacles to the phone is horrible. Gulps turn into for food. I thought she didn’t like me. But about Roberts’ admission, some, however, living an open life. Each coming out pro- uncontrollable sobbing. One must just she was my cat and she followed me on felt a personal congratulation to Roberts cess is unique, yet African Americans face listen, pay witness and I pity anyone who my paper route and at least once rode on coming especially from President Obama a path entwined with family, religion, rac- can not identify with such grief. I’ve cried my shoulders. I treasure those memories. was not warranted and highlighted “divi- ism and more. like that more than once. I understand I loved her. siveness” rather than inclusion. “Robin Roberts should be congratulat- the pain and I understand there is noth- And can you believe what I named “That message of inclusion is missing ed, again, for her bravery. Let’s not let our ing one can do. Sally cried like that when her? Not Desdemona, not Princess Alex- in this country, as demonstrated by the growing marriage equality success blind she phoned to say that Graham, whom I andra, nope. This gay child who loved President’s odd decision to make a news us to the very real challenges many still often baby sat, had been put down. Same Judy Garland and read Vogue and stared event out of a person being gay. Such find to living an open and honest life.” convulsive sobbing. And she’s a fairly at his face in the mirror thinking how solicitous affection is creepy and divi- It’s my hope Murphy not only re- controlled Southern lady. The pain just much he looked like the actress Jean Sim- sive. It’s like gushing over someone with reads her op-ed but also takes a look at erupts. mons, called his cat.... Kitty. Honey, that’s a deformity. Most people don’t want to be O’Connell’s. Ritchie, my long time best straight gay shame. patronized; they just want to be treated friend, is prone to drama, maybe that’s the Email: [email protected] like everyone else,” Wendy Murphy wrote A Few Bricks Short glitch that binds us. He went on and on. in a Patriot Ledger op-ed titled “It’s fine to His time with Spike was longer than his F aith Matters be gay, but is it GREAT?” April Fool! failed marriage lasting a third of his own R obin Roberts loosens Murphy, an ex-prosecutor and an By David Hull life. Spike’s recent birthday was celebrated adjunct professor at New England Law, is Growing up on Facebook. This was not an inconse- the grip of black a local legal pundit celeb. She’s also white my parents did not quential relationship, this was deep and homophobia and heterosexual, and has at least one make me a homo- abiding love and it had come to an end. LGBTI friend or acquaintance (I know sexual – so I had There were cats in my childhood By Rev. Irene this because Murphy told me before we to go out and make home. My mother took possession of Monroe suited up to appear on Boston’s local TV one for myself! them. They provided more consolation While I will show Greater Boston to discuss her oppos- I do know that than she took from her two children. continue to argue ing views that perhaps she should have when I was single There was a cat I rescued after he crawled the African Amer- run her op-ed by someone gay before sub- I always thought it indoors after a dreadful accident which ican community mitting it.) was kind of cool that I could cruise any- ultimately rendered him blind in one eye, doesn’t have a pat- “If the president and his wife want time I wanted -- regardless of whether I toothless and minus a third of his tail. ent on homophobia, to use their bully pulpit to influence was near water or not. And I was truly a In tribute to his savior, Dr. Bloestine, it does, howev- social norms, they should be congratu- Good Samaritan back then because I was the veterinarian I took him to, I named er, have a problem lating people not because they’re gay, but always willing to give another guy a hand. him Leon. My mother called him Bippy, with it. because they did something meaning- I’ve always liked my men the way I like after a Disney mouse she liked. I could Black homophobia still has a deadly ful for society, without regard for per- my subways – hot, packed and unloading never win with my mother. Ultimately I hold on African American life. And while sonal risk or gain. Robin Roberts may every 30 minutes. I mean, I understood conceded she deserved this choice. Her I would like to say its oppressive grip only well deserve that kind of attention, but that lust was no substitute for love, but it cats were loyal; they returned the love she impacts lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender we’ll never know because the Obamas sure beat the heck out of learning how to failed to find elsewhere. and intersex people of African descent, in were thinking more about politics than crochet. I’ve never had cats as an adult. My truth, black homophobia maims the entire humanity when Roberts got a presidential I was raised right; I would never hurt glib attitude that I prefer other people’s community. salute,” Murphy continued. someone’s feelings by saying something children and other people’s cats because For example, to date more than a Oddly, Murphy isn’t alone with this hurtful to their face. I do the right thing I can love them for twenty minutes and quarter of a million African Americans view. There were also many gay, bi and and talk about them when they leave the leave masks a deep fear that I will never have died of AIDS – both straight and trans people who felt similar to Murphy, room. be able to endure the loss when death gay. especially with us now in an era of accep- My father always told me that moti- comes. I’m not ready yet and it’s been a There are many persistent social and tance of LGBTI people in news broad- vated risk takers often fail. Of course, the long, long time. economic factors contributing to the high casting like CNN’s Anderson Cooper, same thing is true for idiotic fools. I’ve So I have an imaginary cat these last rates of the epidemic in the African Amer- ABC’s Good Morning America former never been quite sure which group I fall few years. She looks a lot like Leon. I ican community – racism, poverty, health weather anchor Sam Champion, MSN- into. change her name often. Sometimes when care disparity, violence, to name just a BC’s Rachel Maddow and her colleague Money can’t buy happiness, but it is I am in a mischievous mood I call her few. But the biggest attitudinal factor still Thomas Roberts, to name a few. much more comfortable to cry in a Lexus Shaquanda. Lately she’s been Dorothy. I contributing to the epidemic and showing Murphy, like so many, is befuddled than on a bicycle. imagine her affection lying next to me in no sign of abating is homophobia. about the president’s brouhaha with Rob- I was at a psychic fair one time and a bed when I’m done with reading and TV Like many of us who have grown up erts’ coming out disclosure, since he has woman walked up to me and told me that and cannot fall asleep. in communities of African descent, here used his bully pulpit for that very purpose she was a medium. I told her that I used The Cinema Theater has a new cat. and abroad, we cannot, however, escape by legislating on behalf of LGBTI civil to be a medium when I was younger, but They have always had a house cat and the the cultural, personal, interpersonal, and rights – like repealing Don’t Ask, Don’t now I’m an XL. And why do you never most recent one, Princess, died half a year institutional indoctrinations in which Tell, the Matthew Shepard and James read the newspaper headline “Psychic ago. She wasted away from cancer and in homophobia is constructed in our very Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, and Wins Lottery?” the lobby there was a collection basket makeup of being defined as black. the repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act, I leave my car, which is worth a few for contributions towards her care. Prin- The community’s expression of its to name a few. thousand dollars, out in the driveway, cess’s death was mourned on the LED intolerance of LGBTI people is easily seen And let’s not forget Roberts got while my husband fills up the garage with marquee outside the theater. Very classy. along gender lines. For example, sisters the coveted interview when the White junk. Princess was a bit of a bitch with a ter- mouth off about us while brothers get House specifically chose her for President Why do drive-up ATMs have Braille rible, piercing yowl. She would, as had her both – verbally and physically – violent Obama’s May 2012 coming out interview lettering? february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 23

Do they sterilize needles for lethal stuff, swished my little girl butt to make prosperity for all Americans. If you know exacerbate our country’s economic woes. injections? my skirt’s plastic fringe whisper. Pranced me at all, this will not come to you as a Federal, state and local governments must Alcohol will never solve any of your proudly. Until… during ‘roll out your lit- surprise— the biggest issue facing our not starve municipal budgets. problems; then again, neither will milk. tle rug and take a little nap’ …that snotty- country today is income inequality and FOUR: CREATE A FAIR TAX Why is lemon juice made with arti- nosed boy-beast grabbed my fringe and the devastating role that poverty plays in STRUCTURE ficial lemon flavoring, but dishwashing wrenched off handfuls. His name is Percy, our communities. We all need to be telling a new and detergent is made with real lemons? and I still hate him. As soon as most folks hear the word meaningful story about paying taxes that Why do drugstores make sick people Ok, so maybe I should not wear a cos- “poverty,” certain beliefs and prejudices celebrates the concrete opportunity it walk all the way to the back to get their tume dragging such traumatic baggage. automatically kick in. On the political offers “we the people.” The problem is, prescriptions while healthy people can buy Although I do like that butchy, leather right, the word conjures notions of bad without the public systems and structures cigarettes at the front counter? look. Anyway, for this gala, I need some- choices and personal failings – and some- that taxes pay for, the America we know Are you annoyed by immigrants? Tell thing other than the cowlesbian total- times, racial makeup. On the left, people and love would cease to exist. it to a Native American. body-covered-up costuming. think more of hard circumstances beyond Let me be clear — according to most Let’s face facts, people. Democrats are Let me ponder. I have always loved a one’s control and the lack of opportunity. economists, there is no correlation between sexy. Whoever heard of a nice piece of touch of flesh and fluff. Loved, at age 30, Whatever our politics, if we stay the giving tax breaks to wealthy corporations elephant? my festive gold, shape-tight knit, navel- present course it’s less likely that we will and job growth. Do you hear me Gover- The born-again-Christians always get exhibiting pants and a teeny nearly-bikini be able to think of poverty as something nor Cuomo? Make the rich pay their fair mad at me when I ask them: “After the top. Also I love a dash of flash. Ah, fond that affects just the few. If you haven’t share by ending unfair tax breaks. A func- Rapture, can I have your car?” memories of my 1972 gleaming hot pink, noticed folks, the middle class is shrink- tioning democracy should be designed to I don’t know about you, but I have skin-tight pants with décolletage top… ing very fast. No functioning democracy have a progressive tax structure that is in a hard time recognizing the fine line both loosely held together with tempting can survive without a strong middle class proportion to the means and ability to pay between boredom and hunger. black laces. with living wage jobs—we need everyday for the essential vital services we demand Contact David at [email protected] Whoa, back to reality, Miss Thing. consumers who have purchase power to and cannot do by ourselves as individuals. Those once-upon-a-time body-revealing buy goods and services to keep our econo- FIVE: BEEF UP SOCIAL SAFETY C leaning My Closet fashion statements were forty oh-mercy- my moving in the right direction. NETS me years ago. Okay, OK, I get it… none Here is my ten point equality focus for Expand and broaden Social Security, Affectations of that peek-a-boo or LOOK apparel a pro-middle class anti-poverty agenda: Medicare and Medicaid, as so eloquently By Meredith for this ball. Yes, oh-dear-goddess, yes, I ONE: EQUALITY AND CIVIL explained by Massachusetts Sen. Eliza- Elizabeth clearly understand that I now inhabit this RIGHTS beth Warren. Reiniger seventy-year-old conglomeration of shab- Congress must pass ENDA this year SIX: SINGLE PAYER HEALTH- I am in love. by, saggy, worn and torn, body parts. I and protect the civil and human rights CARE I love felines and wonder if the Steampunk catalogues carry of our global community. Moreover, we Protect people from going hopelessly flowers, butter and brass-studded Muumuus. must advocate protecting United States into debt through the high price of receiv- birds, streams and Better riffle through for other options. voting rights such as access to voting, in ing healthcare and medical services. The sugar, peanut butter Hmm, outer underwear. Unmentionables the many places where such rights are ACA has failed to put a tight lid on poten- and puddles, vio- as unashamedly visible wear are noth- under attack. The U.S. Department of tial total medical costs. Eventually, we lets and Vegas, and ing new. I expect there were cave hussies Justice should validate all same sex mar- must join the civilized world with single watermelon rind pickles. who abandoned their bear pelt onesies riages in the United States. These families payer healthcare. Oh love. Oh cupid, February’s cheru- to flaunt their squirrel-skin dainties. For should not be held to a higher standard by SEVEN: EDUCATE ALL OUR bic hunter, why hast thou led me to pros- sure we full-time and part-time hussies enduring prolonged discrimination and KIDS trate my piteous self before my beloved have been showing off for eons. paying higher taxes. Increase federal and state aid to state- watermelon pickle. I am driven to pen a I fondly recall that I did my Under- TWO: WORKER RIGHTS supported education. It’s absurd that poor love note: Dearest, most beauteous WP. I wear Come Out long ago. Searching Restore the rights of all working peo- and middle class families have to go into will write oodles of odes to you, my love, antique stores, I had discovered an amaz- ple with respect to collective bargaining, debt just to pay for an education. The my juicy, tantalizing, moist, green lover. ing pair of to-the-knee lace-trimmed due process and protections from wage economic disparity between rich school Your luscious red edges call my name. You white cotton, Convenience Pants. Called theft. districts and poor school districts should are the most succulent pickle I have ever that because they conveniently had no THREE: AUSTERI- be marginalized. loved. Happy Valentine’s Day, my pre- front-to-back middle seam. The material TY DOESN’T WORK EIGHT: STRENGTHEN FEDER- cious pickle. merely overlapped, allowing a lady to use All Americans must understand that AL REGULATIONS Bah humbug. Romantic love is worse the commode without the bother of vir- austerity policies do not work, and only Strengthen federal regulations so irre- than the flu. Indeed, the very word irri- tual disrobing. Furthermore, Convenience tates me. Love: a state of befuddlement. Pants permitted a real lady to oblige her Love: a four-letter time bomb. Perhaps husband’s marital privilege while preserv- tm Godiva, jewelers, some humans, and all ing her propriety even between the sheets. dogs think otherwise. But I have only to No flashing of that sort for me. I was Learn the listen to lyrics and peruse poetry to know more sedate in 1984. I sewed the gaping its scourge. Hmm, it must be February drawers securely closed and wore those history of the again… another month needing me to altered pants with an antique camisole rant against another festival I do not love. and black stockings. White leather, knee- LGBT community Which makes the 2014 GAGV Red high, laced boots. Black hat with a huge Ball the perfect theme for the likes of me. red rose. Now that was a statement. Because steampunk is about returning to If I still have that decades old outfit in in Rochester... the past or leaping to the future, about life my closet, out it will come and I will be in a science fiction world or a post apoca- ready to create Steampunk sassy. lypse earth. More about costuming than Set: strap on a corset; suffer a waist ...from the coupling. cincher; snap on wrist cuffs; swing some When my artist friend mentioned the chains bearing fancy gold keys; tightly people who theme, I told her: Steampunk! I never secure brass gears, bug pins, and antique heard of it. “Of course you haven’t,” she pocket watches. made that swiftly observed. Well, Google will save Go…and swish my sultry self into Ste- the day, I lovingly snapped. Into Wikipe- ampunk swirling. history. dia and beyond I went. I was astounded Embracing, for some unfathomable by the wide range of activities, beliefs, art, reason, my forever love, sweet Watermel- books, music, machines, costumes and on Pickle. The Gay Alliance invites you to accouterments in the layered history and [email protected] vast worlds of steampunk. celebrate 40 years of LGBT history Steampunk is a counter culture that C onundrums wonderfully accommodates our Lesbian, H ere’s My Ten Point Plan Gay, Bi-Sexual, Transgender, Intersexual, in Rochester with your very own Queer, Questioning, TwoSpirit, Allies, for a Better America CD of this powerful film. What’s-It-To-You realities. Simply fabu- By Ove Overmyer lous. Our Steampunk ball invites us to In January of come out and play. To bring a friend and every year, lawmak- a persona. ers, corporations, Shoulders To Stand On The fun part for me is that Steampunk civic groups, lob- offers no-boundaries dress-up… mix and byists and activists Evelyn Bailey, match for the brave… a bit of horse lovin’, create game plans gun totin’ lesbian, a morsel of Victorian or “agendas” to re- Executive Producer Hussy, a smidgen of sci-fi bold broad, a define their mission rag of renegade, a scrap of survivor, a chip statements if you Kevin Indovino, of techno-temptress. (Not that LGBTI will. This year is no different. In fact, events are ever mainstream couture.) New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has Producer/Director/Writer A dance. A ball. Oh my stars! So little already delivered his vision for the upcom- time. So few practicing Fairy Godmoth- ing legislative session—with mixed results ers. So many options. I might add. Well, I might like to be a Wild West While it’s true that I do belong to Standard DVD $25 / BluRay DVD $30 cowpoke. In kindergarten I had my cow- many organizations, including taking an girl debut. I loved my brand spankin’ oath of office with my union (CSEA), I Order at: www.GayAlliance.org new Annie Oakley outfit. Behind my have my own personal agenda for what I fringed vest, I puffed out my flat, baby think might be the right path to shared chest. Around the room I strutted my 24 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014 sponsible companies and banks do not to confirm my feelings and speak out having to fight against external categori- I think the NSFW label (which I would rob ordinary tax-paying Americans and about them, I felt like I would be a fraud zation. If they consistently date someone agree is necessary for most of these rather destroy the land, water and air we need. if I did get up on stage. I made a promise of the “opposite” sex (or the same sex) they questionable “articles”) might actually be NINE: HELP THE UNEMPLOYED to myself that next time there was such an are labeled as straight or gay and in denial. deterring some potential allies. PERMANENTLY event, I would. All of these qualities are best identi- People see these articles during their Create posterity bill language to This past November of 2013, at the fied internally. Other people may occa- workday, with their catchy titles, and may extend federal benefits permanently for end of the week of mourning for the sionally say, “Gee, Laine, you act like you be genuinely curious or sympathetic to the long term unemployed. Why does loss of many members of the worldwide have a female symbol hovering over your our cause. However, NSFW stops them Congress do this every three months? Trans* community to hatred, Shauna held head,” but no one really sees it besides me. dead in their tracks; no one wants to get This is called unemployment insurance the event again, and I got up and spoke. Another person’s inability to perceive it, in trouble at work for dubious computer for a reason. The only people who are eli- Following is an abbreviated version of my however, makes it no less real. activity. gible for unemployment insurance have message, which I think is vital to share: The basis of the LGBT rainbow is So how exactly is including mate- met the working criteria earlier in the I’m here to talk about personal sub- formed around experiences that are per- rial that is not suitable for work helping working life. And, let’s remember the jective experiences. You see, when I was sonal and subjective. It’s important to our fight for civil rights, I would like to lesson learned in the Great Depression: born, I had a female symbol hanging keep that in mind; your experiences are know? Sure, I imagine it brings in the when the private sector can’t come up over my head. No one else could see it, just as subjective as mine, but that makes youth demographic which is clearly lack- with jobs, the government must fill the and no one believed it when I told them. them no less real to me or to you. Recog- ing these days in effort and participation. void by assisting those out of work and They told me that I was wrong, or crazy, nizing this and embracing and respecting But how a video showcasing the anatomy creating jobs with them in mind. or thought that I was joking, so I learned it is, I feel, the most important element in of a twerking bear-daddy in rubber and TEN: SUPPORT THE RIGHTS OF not to talk about it. This was a personal maintaining a stable, safe community that leather aids in this struggle for equality, is WOMEN subjective experience for me: no one but we can all thrive in. quite beyond me. Protect the workplace, healthcare and I am able to verify it, and there is no way Why not at least parody or tear apart reproductive rights of women. to take a picture of the rainbow female What’s Bothering a famous artist’s homophobic “work” in That’s all I need to say here. symbol that is even now bobbing above a scathing essay, or make an honest and my head. Brandon? educated response to institutionalized T rans*missions That, as I see it, is one of the things NSFP: Not Suitable for heteronormativity in our school system? that all the colors in the LGBT rainbow Responses like these, I hope, would draw Personal Subjective have in common: we are all describing Progress in more allies or at least reach the eyes Experiences personal, subjective experiences that are By Brandon W. and ears of more conservative individuals, nonetheless very real to us. There is no Brooks who I assume would be all but comatose if By Laine DeLaney gayometer I can stick in someone’s head to I’ll admit it; I they dared click on a link with the NSFW I was visiting tell how gay they are. I’ve known people often waste hours disclaimer. Rochester during who have been in heterosexual relation- scrolling through I must say, I myself avoid these NSFW 2012 Pride when ships for years who later came out as gay; my newsfeed, on links not only to spare myself the embar- the first “The their prior relationships had no bearing on a not-so-obscure rassment of a computer audit, but also Good, the Bad, and their actual sexual orientation. Anyone social media site. because I find myself getting upset by the Funny” event can learn to play a role. And here I am their lack of a clear equality-seeking mes- was held. It was an Every once in a while we discover a about to give you sage. If you want equality, you have to open mic event held physical, medical correlation to sexual a written tirade on why we as LGBT fight for it, and shaking your hairy ass at Equal Grounds, orientation or gender identity. While this persons are not making a strong enough (however attractive it may be) is not help- conceived of by Shauna O’Toole, as a way is useful, it’s also important to remember effort to win the proverbial fight. Here ing. to give a segment of our community that that our orientations and identities are goes nothing. Our fight for equality can, at times, does not often have much voice an oppor- not things that can, in the end, be empiri- During these aimless and idle scrolls, I be a balancing act between appeasing the tunity to stand up and speak their minds cally externally verified. Trans* people am often confronted with links to articles, uneducated masses by watering-down our in a public forum. are quite familiar with having to justify photo spreads, and videos labeled NSFW. LGBT heritage, while at the same time When I attended the first event, I our experiences to professionals whose NSFW is a means of alerting potential making certain our LGBT heritage is not wasn’t ready to speak at all. I really, really understanding of our condition is entirely viewers that the material is “not suitable lost, but rather strengthened, in the pro- wanted to, but given that I was not yet out external. for work.” cess. One does not need to become Miley as transgender and hadn’t done the last Likewise, I’ve had plenty of bi-and- What makes something unsuitable Cyrus to demonstrate our vigilance or necessary steps of soul-searching needed pansexual friends who have described for a work environment, one might won- determination to gain equality, nor does der (risking a blush in the process)? This one need to don the habit of a nun. In the label is added as a disclaimer, indicating words of the Dowager Countess, “Never that pornographic or sexually suggestive substitute wit with vulgarity.” material, vulgar and common language, Forgive me for reinforcing benevolent or even illegal drug use may be present stereotypes, but aren’t gay people above in the aforementioned article, video or these vain and puerile attempts of atten- photo spread. It is a means by which one tion-seeking? Clearly attention is wanted is spared the embarrassment of a future (and indeed garnered) by the authors of computer audit, where this material may these racy videos, but possibly for the prove troublesome for the user. wrong reasons, or at least with the wrong So why am I seeing this NSFW label outcome. I doubt very much that a poli- on material that professes to be “fighting tician on the fence about LGBT equality the good fight” for the LGBT popula- would be suddenly swayed in our direc- tion? Is this label being placed on LGBT- tion after witnessing the gyrating pelvic related material simply because of the thrusts of an Andrew Christian model (or fact that it concerns LGBT persons (who maybe he would be, who knows). are, of course, innately sexually inappro- All I can say is that we as LGBT per- priate)? This was my first thought, and sons need to make a more honest and less I was infuriated. How could someone sexually explicit attempt in reaching a get away with labeling anything LGBT- larger audience in our struggle for equal related as NSFW, and more importantly, rights and representation. The stereotype how could I personally give them a piece that gay men in particular are promis- of my mind? cuous and purely sexually driven is not The idea that there was some unknow- exactly being disproved by these articles ingly-heteronormative twerp out there and, I feel, will only act to build up our labeling anything LGBT as NSFW pissed barriers. me off. My ire, however, was quickly At the end of the day, it is our own extinguished, only to be rekindled when I personal choice whether or not to click on found out that the authors of these links these NSFW links. I just ask you to pon- were in fact gay people. der this last thought while doing so; is it These articles do, to be fair, contain suitable for progress? some minute expressions of civil unrest; Questions, comments or critique? Feel same-sex marriage is the most often cited free to e-mail the author at: brandonb@ (more than not the only cited) example gayalliance.org ■ of what we as LGBT persons are fighting for. What bothers me is that nudity, ille- gal drug use, and foul language are not required to get one’s point across. In fact, february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 25

purchase of a house for this project. Any (the Nopper conference room) on the fifth members of the community who might floor in the Auditorium Theatre, 875 be able to offer donations, help, or profes- E Main St. on the last Saturday of each Community sional advice would be greatly appreciated! month between 3 – 5:30 p.m. Parking Also at our November meeting, is available in the back of the theatre off JoAnne proposed changing the name of Prince St. and College Ave. Note: if there the group from “Rochester Trans Group” is a guard at the booth, just say you’re Find the friends, fun, and common interests you’re looking for through to “Trans* Alliance of Greater Rochester” here for the Gay Alliance and they have the various groups listed here. (based on the suggestion made by Gabri- instructions to let you in without paying elle Hermosa to add the word “Alliance” the parking fee. Once in the door, walk to the group’s name, and Laine DeLaney’s down the hall to the main lobby, turn column describing the use of the asterisk right and the elevator will be right there; B utch Femme events happen all the time. and its significance to the Trans* com- on the fifth floor just follow the signs to Connection Becky, our favorite waitress and den munity from November’s Empty Closet). the meeting. mom, has taken a break from work, so The decision was largely supported Also if you’re coming by bus get off The Rochester Butch Femme Connec- we are trying out a new restaurant every by members in attendance, and the name at the Prince St. stop, walk up the side- tion supper club will have one event in Wednesday night for supper. The BEARS change was made! This was followed by a walk to the first set of doors (they have February 2014. recommend the Merchant Pasta House on good deal of discussion about alterations the number 875 in large letters over On Saturday, Feb. 22, we will meet Merchant for a great meal. and updates to the website and Facebook them). Once you’re in the lobby head at Jay’s Diner on Rte. 15 (West Henrietta In February, the BEARS have a pot- group. toward the elevator and go up to the 5th Rd.) at 7 p.m. luck on the 8th up in the 5th floor GAGV The December meeting was primar- floor and follow the signs. For further information, please call meeting room. Starts at 6 p.m. ily a support meeting and had a general Our website is: www.rnytg.org or Kerry/Max at (585) 288-7208. discussion facilitated by JC, one of our on Facebook at: https://www.facebook. ROMANS Steering Group members. It was quite com/RochesterTransGroup. Dignity-Integrity ROMANS celebrated the most won- well-attended. It was also our first meet- ing under the new name of Trans* Alli- D-I Rochester meets weekly at 5 p.m. derful time of the year with a naked party T he Social Grind at a member’s home. ance of Greater Rochester. at St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Of special note was that members of A new social group is coming to Roch- Fitzhugh St., corner of Broad St. We have Good food, fine drinks, engaging ester starting Feb. 4, 2014! The group, games, festive decorations, interesting RochesterNYGrrlz, a local crossdressing the following services and activities for the group, came to support us and discuss the The Social Grind, is open to all members month of February 2014. conversation and, in addition, a relax- of the LGBT community. ing soak in the hot tub; everyone had creation of a crossdresser-specific support 1st Sunday: Episcopal Mass/Healing and meetup group for those in their com- The idea came from lifelong Roches- Service, with music. a fabulous time. The voting for president, terian David Hutchinson, with the belief treasurer and secretary took place at this munity who are not interested in meeting 2nd Sunday: Roman Catholic Liturgy in a bar-type environment. We had sev- that our community needs different ways to of the Word, with music. meeting and members also brought cans meet people in a casual, drama free setting. of soup to contribute to a food pantry in eral new faces and stories, and some great 3rd Sunday: Quiet Episcopal Mass in refreshments including a delicious Subway “Not everyone is interested in going to a bar the Chapel. Rochester. and the internet can be so impersonal and I Early in December, some ROMANS mini sub tray (provided by JC). 4th Sunday: Evening Prayer, followed In February we will have Raquel Acev- believe people need more options.” by a Potluck Dinner! members networked with the Syracuse The group will meet on Tuesday Naked Men members to rekindle our edo-Pagan coming to our meeting! Raquel Our Potluck theme for February is has extensive experience in helping people mornings from 10 a.m.-12 noon at Equal “Brinner: Breakfast for Dinner”. We had comradeship. Our members also went to Grounds, 750 South Ave. and Thursday enjoy the performance of the Rochester express themselves through artwork and this theme earlier in 2013 and had a great art therapy, and is looking forward to evenings from 7:30-9:30 p.m. at Spot Cof- meal so we decided to repeat ourselves. Gay Men’s Chorus’ holiday performance. fee, 200 East Ave. Attendees are required At the January meeting that took place helping us find ways to express those feel- No time to cook or shop? Just ask a friend ings that we just cannot find the words for to purchase their own beverages/snacks at or two and join us for food and fun! at a new member’s home, ROMANS the venue sites. members made plans on the nude and – a common experience in our commu- News from the Pews: Our 7th Annual nity. Bring whatever art supplies you can, For additional information or to express Christmas Hymn Sing was terrific! If you clothed club activities for 2014. an interest in attending, please email David There are two nude swims scheduled but it’s fine if you don’t bring anything – missed it this year (or previous years), supplies will be provided! We are looking at [email protected]. Please put Social look for details next November. You won’t for February: 2/1 mixed swim at Harro Grind in your email header. ■ East and 2/22 Men Only swim at Vas- forward to seeing you there! want to miss it again! We meet in the Gay Alliance’s office The February Winter Cabin Party is sar Street. on Saturday, Feb. 15, from 4 p.m. to 9 ROMANS is a social club for gay p.m. in Brighton. This is a great way to and gay-friendly male nudists over chase the chill away… warm fireplace, 21. All ROMANS activities are list- warm food, lots of laughter. Bring a dish ed on our website at http://www.wnyro- to share and a favorite game if you wish. mans.com. Write to us at wnyromans@ Catch up with folks you haven’t seen in a yahoo.com or call our inquiry line at 585- while or meet new friends. 281-4964. Naked hugs and Happy Nude You can call the Hotline at 585-234- Year! 5092 or check our website at www.di- rochester.org/ for updates on services and R ochester Trans activities. Group is now EMPIRE BEARS Trans*Alliance of January’s over. February’s here, Spring Greater Rochester is just around the corner. Yahoo! Our November meeting was an emo- If you’re a camper, Jones Pond, Hill- tional one as JoAnne Metzler discussed side, and others start taking reservations. her recent hospitalization and her deci- The BEARS are enjoying cuddle time sion to create an overarching goal for our inside, but we do get out to walk at the group: a plan to create a home for Trans* mall, bowl, have dinner with friends, and and LGB people who have nowhere else to catch movies at The Cinema. go and no one else to turn to. Make your reservations for Drenched For the time being, the project is being Fur in Erie. It’s steamy at the water park. called the Welcome Home, and JoAnne Members keep in touch, and impromptu has set about collecting funds towards the 26 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

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new set of eyes on an old subject, move the play toward its conclu- which is still relevant. It sheds a sion. The gay community now light for all of us on what our recognizes that they were the Arts & Entertainment responsibilities are. ones who brought and continue “Kramer said that when he to bring the awareness needed was thrown out of the organiza- to make changes and get the ist, Dr. Emma Brookner is based tion he had helped create, Gay drugs and treatment. You read on the late Dr. Linda Lauben- Men’s Health Crisis, he was dev- about the protests and ACT UP stein, one of the first doctors to astated. He went to Europe and demonstrations that followed treat patients with HIV, and the decided to visit Dachau. There the early years, and it is no lon- other characters are based on he saw a sign – ‘Opened in 1933.’ ger words on a page. It becomes the friends Kramer started Gay He realized that the concentra- a living, breathing production Men’s Health Crisis with. tion camps went on for 12 years showing real people who are not “You start getting so much before anyone knew. There was statistics – but who loved and information in bits and pieces,” this whole silence. Then he knew cared and fought and were pas- Coughlin said, “and I’m antici- he had to write this play. sionate about life. That goes out pating that all this will gel in “Now we’re doing the play from the actors to the audience.” rehearsal. The word I’m try- at the Jewish Community Cen- Coughlin concluded, ing to imprint on the actors is ter, and the parallels between “Another thing that’s real- PASSION. Not only to end the the Holocaust and The Normal ly important as I continue to epidemic but also unexpectedly Heart are interesting. immerse myself is that there’s a falling in love for real. “I’m so pleased to be doing new generation of people in the “The other word is FIGHT this show. When I read the play, heterosexual community who – because that’s what it takes to I thought of the responsibili- have more and more gay friends get a subject like this out into ty we have to make sure that and there’s more acceptance the community, the country and we educate, not just entertain. and understanding – all com- the world.” There’s a lot of humor, but when ing from the early ‘80s when He added, “The most inter- the audience leaves they may Kramer started pushing for vis- esting thing about the JCC pro- leave with an awareness they ibility and awareness. There’s duction is that people of various didn’t have coming in. more understanding and com- ages will see it and there will be “I’m immersed in that period passion today and that’s what a sense of retrospective knowl- – finding out about the author presenting this show at JCC is edge. After 25 years you have a and the ancillary characters who all about.” ■

Brian Coughlin. Photo: Susan Jordan “ Boeing Boeing” doupis says, “Boeing Boeing is Feb. 2 at 2 pm. that perfect after holiday pick- Tickets are $28.50-$36.50 is on stage at me-up. It soars with non-stop and available in person at Black- JCC presents Larry started doing their own research, Blackfriars Theatre hilarity and is a fast paced romp friars Theatre, online at www. Kramer’s “The starting with the auditions in that’s the perfect solution to blackfriars.org, or by call- November and the first read- Take a trip back to the 1960s Rochester’s grey winter skies.” ing 585-454-1260. If available, Normal Heart” through in December. I’ve told with Blackfriars Theatre’s pro- The cast features some of tickets can be purchased at the them I’m amassing a lot of data. duction of Marc Camoletti’s Rochester’s finest talent includ- door beginning one-hour prior By Susan Jordan hilarious play, Boeing Boeing. On March 8, the 2012 Tony At the first rehearsal on Jan. 19, ing Jake Holliday Purcell as to performance. Box Office I’m sure they’ll be well prepared. Swinging bachelor Bernard bachelor Bernard, Jason Minc- hours are Monday through Fri- Award-Winner for Best Revival couldn’t be happier: a flat in of a Play, The Normal Heart by “It gives me so much joy to er as his sidekick Robert, Kerry day, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., and find people asking the right ques- Paris and three gorgeous stew- Young as the housekeeper Saturdays, noon to 4 p.m. Mas- Larry Kramer, will hit the JCC ardesses all engaged to him with- stage in connection with LGBT tions! That’s a great plus for me Berthe, Janine Mercandetti as terCard, Visa, and Discover are as a director, to see that dedica- out knowing about each other. the Italian stewardess Gabriel- accepted at no additional charge. Health Month, complete with But Bernard’s perfect life gets community-wide partnerships tion and commitment. I’ve tried la, Brynn Kathryn Tyszka as the Blackfriars Theatre, a pro- to impress upon them that we bumpy when his friend Robert German stewardess Gretchen fessional, not-for-profit the- and panel discussions. comes to stay and a new and The Normal Heart is Kram- have a huge responsibility with and Kait Meleski as the Ameri- atre on Rochester’s “Theatre this play because AIDS is still speedier Boeing jet throws off all can stewardess Gloria. Row,” is located at 795 East er’s famous play about the early of his careful planning. Soon all years of the AIDS epidemic, ongoing and we need continued Boeing Boeing will take flight Main St. Parking is available awareness – it’s not going away.” three stewardesses are in town at Blackfriars Theatre, 795 East on site. Handicapped seating is when Ronald Reagan’s spokes- simultaneously, timid Robert is man laughed at the first press The cast includes Steven Main St., running through Feb. available. For more information Cena as Ned Weeks, Kerry forgetting which lies to tell to 8. Performances are Thursday, regarding Blackfriars Theatre, conference about the mysterious whom, and catastrophe looms. disease and dismissed the deaths Young as Dr. Emma Brookner, Feb. 6 at 7:30 p.m.; Friday, Feb. visit their website at www.black- Carl DelBuono as Felix, and Blackfriars Artistic Director 7 at 8 p.m.; Saturdays, Feb. 1 friars.org. ■ of gay men as unimportant, and and the play’s director John Hal- right-wingers claimed that God Peter J. Doyle as Hiram Keebler, and 8 at 8 p.m., and Sunday, was punishing the evil homo- aide to NYC Mayor Koch, alleg- sexuals. And, as the play makes edly a closeted gay man himself, clear, many gay men, even as who just did not want to know. their friends and lovers died, When asked whether a lot of were conflicted and angry about young people don’t know about coming out, taking risks, getting those early years, and even older “political” and making the rap- people have forgotten what it idly-growing epidemic an issue was like, Brian Coughlin said, with oblivious government and “Watching interviews with health authorities. Larry Kramer, one of the things The Empty Closet spoke he feels very passionate about is with director Brian Cough- that there is a whole culture of lin about the JCC production, gay men who are unaware of the which will run for three week- history. As hard as it is, I’m find- ends of eight performances, with ing it fascinating to see where it a panel discussion after several all started and the implications performances. of gays coming out, the sense Brian Coughlin said, “When of pride in who they were – Ralph Meranto first asked me and when they started to come about doing the play, I had done out they would become identi- a reading a number of years fied with their sexuality. Kramer back, and at that time I didn’t became so vocal and angry and wind up doing the research said, ‘you can’t continue to do that I’m doing now that I’m the this’ (casual sex) ‘now – we have director. I don’t claim to be an to take responsibility’. authority, but I’m compiling vast “Doctors and others who amounts of literature and inter- were really in the know came views about the people who were to him and said, ‘you gay men in the forefront when all of this have to stop this rampant sexu- started coming down. ality, bath houses, etc.,’ – and “I’m sharing this history with Kramer passed that on and a lot the cast, so they can sink their of men didn’t want to hear that, teeth into what they need to be just as they were affirming their showing the audience. One won- sexuality.” derful thing about our actors Coughlin said that all the here in Rochester is they are all characters are based on real peo- professionals. The cast I have is ple Kramer knew – he himself wonderful and they have already is Ned Weeks the angry activ- Jake Purcell, Janine Mercandetti Brynn Kathryn Tyszka, and Kait Meleski. Photo by Dan Howell 28 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

of bringing thought-provok- But 14?” DeGeneres joked as she ing, challenging productions to accepted her award. audiences. In keeping with the She told the audience she club’s mission to perform mean- wanted The Ellen DeGeneres ingful, socially-conscious the- Show, now in its 11th year, to atre, DVC has performed shows be a show for everyone -- old, such as Stop Kiss, The Shadow young, black, white, gay or Box, No Exit, and a double bill straight. of The Trojan Women and Neces- “As a matter of fact, just yes- sary Targets, and club-developed terday I was talking to this lovely original projects such as Some- African-American woman and thing to Believe In, Reinvented: she told me she was single and A Dracula-Inspired Goth Rock she works 80 hours a week to Musical and JUNK: the Musical. get by and she looked forward The company operates from to coming home every night and ticket proceeds and donor assis- watching me, and that woman’s tance, and is entirely volun- name is Oprah Winfrey. I think teer-run. In order to provide I am doing something right.” affordable, enlightening theatre, DeGeneres beat out Kelly DVC tickets never exceed $5; Ripa & Michael Strahan, Dr. the group performs at Wilson Phil McGraw, Rachael Ray and is Mr Maupin. He invented San Magnet High School as well as Steve Harvey for her latest win. Francisco.” More importantly, Charles Barksdale MuCCC, 142 Atlantic Ave. Her first People’s Choice Award Maupin virtually invented the Method Machine’s David came in 1995 when she was star- mainstreaming of gay life and helped the world see that “the C harles Barksdale I wear.” Henderson says, “The video ring in the ABC sitcom Ellen. hits from our SPRING IT ON “There’s no better thing than gay experience” was nothing less- When asked which perform- er or greater than human experi- plays “a silly guy” ers who have inspired him the cabaret in 2010 have reached knowing you are making people over 100K on YouTube. The happy,” DeGeneres said. ence. in Sister Act most, Charles said, “Good ques- Maupin came to a realization tion. I wouldn’t say there are videos are posted by fans and Another LGBTI winner By Susan Jordan cast members of the tour AND was Glee star Chris Colfer who of his homosexuality relatively any specific performers I feel late. He was 30 when he came Sister Act will be at the Audi- like have truly inspired me, but include a young and unknown won the award for Favorite TV torium Theatre Feb. 11-16. Andy Mientus (star of ABC’s Comedy Actor. He prevailed in out, the same year he began writ- I find myself always blown away ing. Taking stock of himself the Tickets are available from Tick- when I discover new talents. The SMASH!). what was the gayest category of etmaster.com and the RBTL box “The Spring Awakening and the night since his competition way he would one of his charac- first time I saw White Christ- ters, he once observed: “He had office, 800-745-3000. mas I was obsessed with Vera American Idiot cabarets are a included three other openly gay Charles Barksdale (TJ) result of a long time friendship TV stars: Jesse Tyler Ferguson of kept his heart (and his libido) Ellen but I also loved Brandy under wraps for most of his life, is a Texas native and says he in Cinderella. Sandra Bullock I have with the Broadway direc- Modern Family, Jim Parsons of is “super stoked to make his tor Michael Mayer. We met at The Big Bang Theory and Neil only to discover that the thing always makes me love her more he feared the most had actually national tour debut with the and more and I can’t go wrong Powerhouse Summer Theater on Patrick Harris of How I Met best nuns in the business!” His a play called SideMan, with Edie Your Mother. The fifth nominee become a source of great comfort with Jason Alexander. New up and inspiration.” credits include Off-Broadway: and coming singers like Jere- Falco. Mayer has been a huge was Darren Criss who is straight Fat Camp; Regional: Fat Camp influence in my life for the last but who plays a gay character At the time he began writ- my Jordan and Natalie Weiss ing, he saw gay fiction as both (Cleveland Playhouse Square), really rock my world but I find 18 years and I would not be the on Glee. Ain’t Misbehavin’ (San Anto- artist I am today without his Go to PeoplesChoice.com to bleak and myopic. This was an myself in awe listening to Anna era when Truman Capote still nio Off Broadway Productions); Netrebko or watching the latest guidance and support.” see full list of nominees and win- Regional Tour: Don Giovanni ners. equated his homosexuality with from Tyce Diorio. I pull inspi- his alcoholism and a climate in (San Antonio Opera). As well as ration from everywhere, even E llen wins People’s - See more at: http://www. being a performer, he is a direc- gaystarnews.com/article/ which Gore Vidal could claim: doing #SplitsOnTrees and You- “There were homosexual acts, tor, musical director, choreogra- Tube has a lot to do with that. Choice again: “I ellen-degeneres-wins-record- pher and voice teacher. 14th-peoples-choice-award-and- but not homosexual people.” I think it’s just good to be good think I’m doing Maupin, however, had dis- So what can audiences and true to your art and let our says-i-think-i-am-doing-some- expect? “FUN FUN FUN!” something right” thing-#sthash.FnJIj9Rg.dpuf covered a joyful fraternity and beautiful planet inspire you.” welcoming community in the Charles said. “This show is a He concludes, “Come on By Greg Hernandez on gay- good time for sure. While there bath houses and nightclubs of down and see us and have a good starnews.com; Photo: Twitter F inal Tales of the the city and decided, as he put are a lot of religious jokes in the time watching lots of sequins, The people have spoken and show, don’t worry if you are not City is out: Maupin it, to “[allow] a little air into and if you happen to see us out they love Ellen DeGeneres -- the situation by actually placing Catholic. It is a fun time for all. at a bar don’t be afraid to buy me they really love her. “invented San You can expect to laugh, be visu- gay people in the context of the a drink or two!” The stand-up comic who Francisco” world at large”. ally stimulated (by my beauty) became a sitcom star, then one and dance in the aisles in the A merican music + of the most successful talk show The Days Of Anna Madrigal, end. Besides, who doesn’t like to hosts of all time, won a record the ninth and final installment L ily Tomlin, Jane see Dancing Nuns?” American mayhem 14th People’s Choice Award in of Armistead Maupin’s legend- Wagner marry after He commented on his role = American Idiots! Los Angeles on 8 January. ary Tales Of The City series, was as TJ, “TJ is ridiculous. He’s a “As a young girl growing up published last month. 42 years together silly guy who likes to laugh... A Welcome to a new in New Orleans, if anyone would The Guardian heaped praise By Greg Hernandez on gay- LOT, and is a bit of a jokester. kind of cabaret have told me I was going to win upon Maupin. An excerpt: TJ always has something else starnews.com 14 People’s Choice Awards, I ... I Quentin Crisp once intro- Photo courtesy of Freedom to going on in his head yet he is Method Machine presents mean 12, yes. Thirteen? Maybe. duced him with the boast: “This very simple and just does what “St. Jimmy’s Cabaret,” featuring Marry he’s told... mostly.” the cast of Green Day’s American No one could accuse Lily Like most actors, Charles Idiot, to benefit the young artists Tomlin and Jane Wagner of worked hard to learn his craft. of Rochester’s DVC. rushing into anything. He commented, “Oh man. In On Thursday, Feb. 27, join The Emmy winning couple, middle school I did one play, the cast of Green Day’s American already together 42 years, got but I didn’t act in it. I played my Idiot for a one-night-only, high- married on New Year’s Eve. viola downstage left the whole energy cabaret performance Tomlin, 75, is a comedy icon show. In High School I went to hosted by Rochester’s own and star of stage and screen. a Performing Arts Magnet Acad- METHOD MACHINE. Wagner, 78, is the author of emy and that is when I decided it Following their tour stop at The Search for Signs of Intelligent was time to come out of the pit the Auditorium Theatre, the Life in the Universe, The Incred- and that stage performance was company will put on another ible Shrinking Woman and other for me. I’m from San Antonio show to benefit young artists. Tomlin vehicles. and male so honestly it wasn’t Proceeds from this special event The wedding, reported by too difficult for me to get jobs will benefit DVC, Dream/Visu- columnist Liz Smith, does not there. I have been very lucky in alize/Create, a collection of tal- come as a complete surprise since my professional career so far and ented students and graduates of Tomlin said last August the cou- haven’t had to struggle too much Wilson Magnet High School. ple was considering it. (I hope this continues) but I did Tickets are $30 for VIP tick- Tomlin had said she never hustle a lot to be good at a lot of ets (including special seating and thought getting married would things so it would be easier to be swag bags as well as signed post- be an option for her. But the US cast in lots of things.” ers), $20 for Adults, and $10 Supreme Court’s ruling in June Does he see himself as actor, for Students/Seniors. The eve- that resulted in the end of Cali- dancer, singer, director, or chore- ning will begin at 10:30 p.m. at fornia’s marriage ban got her and ographer – or all equally? RAPA, 727 E Main St. Wagner thinking about making “Actually, pretty much all For tickets, call (585) 325- things legal. equally,” he said. “I like to keep 3366 or visit www.RAPA.org; “You don’t really need to get busy and I also consider myself For more information, go to married, but marriage is awfully a teacher and songwriter as well. www.METHODMACHINE. nice,” Tomlin told E! Online. I feel it is important if I have all org. “Everybody I know who got of these things as my title I have DVC (Dream/Visualize/ married, they say it really makes to be just as strong in each hat Create) celebrates its 13th year a difference. They feel very very happy about it.” Ellen Degeneres. Photo from Twitter february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 29

talkback with the author. a much larger global movement. the stories of artists from all over Three Short Plays by Manuel Presented by Pride Toronto, the globe with our communities. Igrejas. Sunday, Feb. 9 at 2 p.m. WorldPride 2014 Toronto will be “Affiliate Events Program Directed by Peter Fekete. “Pitts- the world’s largest international comprises events organized and burgh!” — “If you are stand- LGBTQ festival to date, and produced by community groups ing on a chair with a noose the first WorldPride in North and external organizations and around your neck, please slip America. It is a 10-day interna- support the diversity initia- off the noose and get off the tional celebration, taking place tives of our community and we chair. Sit in the chair and wait June 20–29, incorporating activ- encourage groups to hold events for the next available counselor ism, education, and the history with an international focus.” who is just around the bend.” and culture of global LGBTQ “WorldPride is an inter- “Lisbon” — Lisbon, 1755. An communities -- and all just a few national LGBT event; bigger earthquake has leveled the hours’ drive from Rochester. than Canada has seen before,” city. Two women, one young “We’re looking forward to says Chrystal Dean, World- and hungry, the other older and presenting the most diverse fes- Pride 2014 Toronto Manager. wealthy emerge from the rubble tival yet,” says TK, Arts & Cul- “We want to make sure the of a church, with a dead duck ture Manager for WorldPride LGBTQ communities and art- and attempt to make their way 2014 Toronto. “Our aim is to ists from around the world in the great ruined city. “Aria present the best LGBTQ artists have every chance to take part for Duane Reade” — She had that Canada and the world have and benefit from this unique a headache. She needed aspi- to offer alongside international opportunity.” ■ rin. There was a Duane Reade. celebrity artists, as well as share Somehow, inside the huge store, she lost herself, disappeared and found herself again. Running Lily Tomlin and Jane Wagner. Photo: Freedom to Marry Time (combined): 50 minutes. Performance followed by a post- part of the “me me me” genera- show talkback with the author Tomlin and Wagner co- tion while grappling with rela- The MuCCC New Play Fes- wrote six comedy television spe- tival is coordinated by New Play Travel tionships, sexuality, and what cials in which Tomlin starred. exactly is expected of them as Facilitator and Artist in Resi- They also co-wrote and pro- they exit college and enter the dence Spencer Christiano. For duced the Grammy Award-win- “real world.” You’ll laugh, you’ll more information, email spen- ning album, Edith Ann: And cringe, you’ll blush... you prob- [email protected]. That’s the Truth, and Gram- ably won’t cry. Running Time: my-nominated albums Modern 90 minutes. Not recommended World Pride 2014 Scream and On Stage. for audiences under 18. Perfor- Toronto will - See more at: http://www. mance followed by a post-show gaystarnews.com/article/ talkback with the author connect with after-42-years-together-lily- “The Cell” by Maria Brandt. global LGBTQ tomlin-and-jane-wagner- Saturday, Feb. 8th at 7:30 p.m. get-married060114#sthash. Directed by Stephanie Siuda. movement J0FoB50D.dpuf Lisa and Harry launch an affair WorldPride 2014 Toronto while following the trail of a has launched its new website, M uCcc announces twenty-year-old environmental introducing a new WorldPride New Play Festival crime. In the process, they both video at www.worldprideto- must decide whether or not it’s ronto.com. The 10-day event is The MuCCC Theater has possible to let go of the past coming up in June. announced its inaugural New and — even more important — Toronto WorldPride organiz- Play Festival, featuring world to change the future. Running ers feel that, as the movement for The Wentworth by the Sea Hotel and Spa (Marriott) in New Castle. premieres of works from local Time: 60 minutes. Rated PG-13 LGBTQ human rights contin- playwrights. All plays are script- for some adult language and ues to grow, so do Pride events in-hand performances, and are suggested sexual content. Perfor- around the world and the need N ew Castle’s hotel’s signature restaurant. followed by post-show talkbacks mance followed by a post-show for a global event connected to elegant hotel There are four areas to this with the authors. fine dining eatery. Enter to view Tickets for all shows are By Merle Exit the bar and lounge area that available at www.MuCCC. Another great road trip, connects to a chef’s bar. You org; $8/advance, $10/door (per as Laurie and I depart from can choose to sit at this bar and show). MUCCC is located 142 Queens with a destination of watch your food being prepared. Atlantic Ave. Portsmouth, New Hampshire. Why salt? There are menu items The schedule is: First, we pass through Ports- where the protein is served on a “Still We Wait” by Truc mouth and over a bridge to the block of salt. I’ll get to that later. Doan, Wednesday, Feb. 5 at city of New Castle, the only The main restaurant actually has 7:30 p.m. Directed by Mario town in NH composed entirely two areas; the closer being less Savastano. Five passengers on an of islands. We can see a huge “formal” and where breakfast is alien spaceship bound for a new building on the hill, Wentworth served (I had a lobster omelet) world find that they can’t quite by the Sea Hotel and Spa, an either off the menu or buffet. leave the old one behind. Run- historic hotel presently operated This leads into the more formal ning Time: 45 minutes. Rated under the Marriott Hotel brand. dining room. There is also a pri- PG-13 for language. Perfor- www.wentworth.com vate glass enclosed room where mance followed by a post-show The lunchtime arrival brought the wines are kept. talkback with the author. us just down the hill to one of their We opted for “fine dining” “Professor Pomfret’s Recog- restaurants, Latitudes Waterfront. in which the food was served nition Scene” by Shirley Ricker, Although you can eat indoors, “French style”. That means that Thursday, Feb. 6 at 7:30 p.m. the weather was perfect for short each guest’s plate was placed at Directed by Shirley Ricker. A sleeves and on the deck for a scenic the same time requiring as many class’s adaptation of an ancient view of the marina. servers to do so. I think that they Roman comedy launches a Clas- When at the sea, have sea- also call it “Presidential style”. sics professor and a student into food. Crisp Local Crab Cake, Cuisine is farm to table with a chance encounter — and into served with a casaba melon salsa, world influences. Prosciutto the real-life recognition of some- ginger and citrus aioli and micro wrapped Maine scallops with thing both have in some way Laverne Cox on the Katie Couric show. herbs for a start. I couldn’t resist an oregano salad and lemon rejected. Assisted by Hermes, having the Coastal Maine Lob- honey was the starter, followed Olympian trickster and med- ster Cobb Salad. A good portion by wood oven Baked Oysters dler par excellence, professor and T rans model, actress talk about issues of fresh lobster meat, smoked with creamed spinach Pernod, student must play their roles. on Katie Couric show: Trans people are bacon, spring dug potatoes, avo- farmers style bacon and Fon- But does Hermes’ meddling lead more than our genitalia cado, tomatoes, grilled Vidalia tina cheese; and Northeast Fam- to the truth or to just another onions, goat cheese and field ily Farms Beef Carpaccio served trick? Running Time: 60 min- Trans model Carmen Carrera and Orange is the New Black actress greens. Now that’s the way to on a Salt Block, with orange utes. Rated PG-13 for a lesbian Laverne Cox appeared on Katie Couric’s show on Jan. 7 and offered begin a trip in New England. and espresso crust, gorgonzola relationship. Performance fol- Katie some guidance on gender identity, advising Couric to steer away Along with spacious rooms cream, Pepper Cress and Crispy lowed a post-show talkback with from a fixation on “private parts” to that of identity and humanity. with breathtaking views, the Capers. the author. Carrera pointed out that in interviews with trans people, inter- hotel has an indoor and outdoor A short road trip around New “The Weekends” by Kather- views “always focus on either the transition or the genitalia” and pool, golf course privilege via Castle -- stopping will bring ine Royal. Friday, Feb. 7 at 7:30 “there’s more to trans people than just that.” the Wentworth Country Club, you to Fort Constitution State p.m. Directed by Melyssa Hall. Cox joined the interview later and pointed out the disproportion- tennis court as well as a Spa and Park overlooking the Piscataqua A developing comedy about ate discrimination and violence that trans people face, adding, “By Wellness Center. I indulged in River and the Atlantic Ocean. what it means to be a millennial. focusing on bodies we don’t focus on the lived realities of that oppres- a 50-minute Reiki Energy Mas- The Portsmouth Harbor Light, Jacob, Stephanie, and Alicia are sion and that discrimination.” sage that totally relaxed my body a working lighthouse, is located three childhood friends attempt- Read more: http://www.towleroad.com/#ixzz2pofWWewb and wound up taking a cat- on the premises. It’s a tour on ing to reconcile their roles as a nap before dinner at SALT, the your own venue. 30 G ay alliance newthe esmpty f closetor • tfhe egaybruary alliance • number 2014 475 • february 2014 Where Have We Been?

E ver wonder where the Gay Rochester VA Out Patient Clinic Alliance Education Program Rose and Joseph Denaro presents? Below is a list of the Interfaith Center places we have been in 2013, Rush Henrietta High School and the ways the Gay Alliance St. John Fisher College may have influenced your life Strong Memorial Hospital in the past year. SUNY Brockport Ever consider becoming a SUNY Oswego trained volunteer member of the TEDX Talk Rochester Gay Alliance Speakers Bureau? Transgender Healthcare Call or email Jeanne for more Conference information (585-244-8640 or Trillium Health [email protected]). University of Rochester (Main Campus) AIDS Clinic at University of University of Rochester Rochester Medical Center (Medical School) Alfred University Webster Thomas High School Americorps Webster-Schroeder High Cabrillo College California School - Alternative Ed Center For Youth Services Program Child Psychiatry of Western Wegmans School of Pharmacy New York at St. John Fisher College ■ City of Rochester’s Project Search Coalition of Black Trade Unionists Statewide Conference Color Run at RIT Coordinated Care Services, Inc Youth Adrianne Chesser leading the Ride for Pride. Photo by Owen. Corning Community College Corning, Inc. Y outh Update: Dayton VA Medical Center “Zombie Prom” is G ay Alliance Volunteer of the Month: Adrianne Chesser DePaul’s National Council on Alcoholism & Drug May 3 Congratulations to Adrianne tor, to share any comments she ticipants who did medical billing Dependence By Dawn Balsis Chesser for being chosen as the might have about Adrianne and and a pathology technician who Dignity-Integrity December and January have Gay Alliance Volunteer-of-the- this is what she had to say: worked his way up to head of his East House been exciting months for The Month for February! As an MD/ “Adrianne Chesser is a gem! department. The series culmi- Eastman School of Music Gay Alliance Youth Program’s PhD student at the University She brings a joyous and calming nated with an amazing visit to Evelyn Brandon Chemical Fabulous Fridays. of Rochester School of Medi- spirit into the center each week. URMC where teens were able Dependency Our youth participated in cine, she is extremely busy with She created one of the most suc- to practice life saving techniques Family Health Fair and Expo talk back sessions after perfor- both classes and research, but cessful youth programs of the on one of their state-of-the-art First Unitarian Church mances of Bare, presented by she makes the time to help sup- year! Our Medical Careers series medical mannequins. They also First Unitarian Society of Ithaca RAPA. We were able to get out port the LGBTQ community. was the Youth Program’s contri- practiced casting a broken bone. Geva Theater into the community to check Adrianne came on the scene bution to March’s LGBT Health “Not only did the teen par- Greater Rochester Collaborative out Artisan Works and Equal in 2011 as a Ride For Pride Month programming here in ticipants learn a lot, it was the MSW Program Grounds Café. We were thrilled biker. She has ridden in the last Rochester. first time many of the panelists HCR Home Care to have Christopher and Jevan three bike ride fundraisers, ped- “Adrianne developed the had worked with the Gay Alli- Human Resource Association from MOCHA at Fabulous Fri- aling a total of 175 miles and four-week workshop series ance. They had such a positive of the Twin Tiers day. They created and played raising a total of over $1,500 for to introduce teens to medical experience. They couldn’t wait Jewish Community Center STI Jeopardy with the youth. It the Gay Alliance! careers. She talked with her col- to volunteer again!” Leadership Genesee Program was a lot of fun in addition to In October of 2012, Adri- leagues at UR Medical Center We are so grateful to have McArdle Ramerman being educational. anne interviewed, trained and and found enough panel par- Adrianne as a part of our volun- Mental Health Association We also watched the movie became a weekly Gay Alliance ticipants for not one, but two teer team. On behalf of the Gay Mental Health Coalition But I’m a Cheerleader. Janu- Youth Program volunteer. I panels. Panelists ranged from Alliance staff and board, we thank Millbrook School in Albany ary 20-24 was No Name Call- asked Kelly Clark, former Inter- oncologists to nursing students you for all of your hours, your Monroe #1 BOCES ■ ing Week. In honor of that we generational Program Direc- at MCC. There were two par- commitment and your support. Monroe Community College streamed a movie about bullying (Damon City) called Straightlaced. Monroe Community College Fabulous Friday continued (Henrietta) their work to help homeless Montessori Academy at the Dr. Gay Alliance Youth (Ages 13-20) LGBTQ Jamaican youth by col- Freddie Thomas Learning lecting clothing and bedding. Fridays, 7-9pm, Open Arms MCC Center If you are interested in joining 707 E. Main Street, Rochester 14605 Nazareth College Fabulous Friday, we meet from 7 New York State Office of p.m.-9 p.m. at 707 E. Main St., Gay Alliance Youth Gender Alcoholism and Substance Identity Support Group (Ages 13-20) Rochester (at Open Arms Met- Abuse Services ropolitan Community Church, Thursdays, 5:30-6:30pm Northeast LGBT Conference behind the RAPA parking lot). Gay Alliance Library NY State Recreation & Parks All youth ages 13-20 are wel- (1st floor, off Prince St. lobby) Society Annual Conference come. Weekly updates on what 875 E. Main Street Open Arms Metropolitan we are up to can be found on our Community Church Facebook page. Youth For more information: Real World Geneseo Program The most exciting news is G ay Alliance Youth Program [email protected] Rochester Central School The Big Gay Prom. It is sched- District Support Center The Gay Alliance Youth program empowers The Gay Alliance uled for May 3 this year and will Rochester Kink Society be held at the Diplomat Party today’s teens to meet today’s challenges! 875 E. Main Street, Fifth Floor Rochester Red Cross It provides a safe space to explore their House. The theme will be “’80s (Auditorium Theater) Rochester Rehab/Ventures Zombie Prom”. We are looking identity, make friends, build community, gain Rochester, New York 14605 PROS for youth who are interested in life skills, become a leader and have fun! Phone: 585 244-8640 Rochester Rehabilitation/ helping out with planning. If OneSource Solutions you are interested please attend Rochester Trans Group Fabulous Fridays. ■

T he Gay Alliance is a non-profit agency, dedicated to cultivating a healthy, inclusive environment where Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning (LGBTQ) people are safe, thriving, and enjoying equal rights. We are a coalition of individuals and groups working to empower LGBTQ people to affirm their identities and create an atmosphere where the diversity of our community can thrive both collectively and separately. We educate and advocate for civil rights for all and for the eradication of homophobia. The Gay Alliance, 875 East Main Street, Rochester, New York 14605 Phone: (585) 244-8640 Fax: (585) 244-8246 Website: www.gayalliance.org E-mail: [email protected] Hours: Monday-Friday, 9 am-5 pm Board President: David Zona Board Vice President: Jessica Muratore Acting Executive Director: Scott Fearing Education Director: Jeanne Gainsburg Database: Kat Wiggall Youth Intern: Dawn Balsis Bookkeeper: Christopher Hennelly The Empty Closet: Editor: Susan Jordan Graphic Designer: Jim Anderson E-mail: [email protected] Phone: (585) 244-9030 Fax: (585) 244-8246 Advertising: (585) 244-9030 february 2G 014 a• nyumber a ll475 • itancehe gay alliance new • the emptys cflosetor february 2014 31 SAGE calendar F ebruary 2014

FEBRUARY 2 D 3pm. No euchre: Euchre cancelled until further notice. FEBRUARY 4 T he Gay Alliance 10:30 Yoga, 11:30 lunch potluck; bring a dish to share. 12:30 Game Day On-Line Resource Bring in your game and show us how to play it. Directory (GARD) on FEBRUARY 6 The online community tool 10:30 Yoga, 11:30 Lunch. Bring brown bag and beverage. providing local, statewide and national resources, 24/7 at: 1pm: Teaching Seniors: How to get up and down safely. Cards. GAR www.GayAlliance.org FEBRUARY 11 10:30 Yoga. 11:30 Lunch. Bring brown bag and beverage. 1pm: Speaker Mari Gean Goodman from Catholic Family Services to speak on Expanded In-Home Services. G ay Alliance Speaking Engagements & Tabling FEBRUARY 13 for December 2013 & January 2014 10:30 Yoga, 11:30 Lunch – bring brown bag and beverage. 1pm arts & crafting . 12/2...... Sharing Our Stories at the Gay Alliance 12/4...... Who’s Who Panel at Corning Community College FEBRUARY 18 12/6...... LGBTQ Substance Abuse Issues at Evelyn Brandon 10:30 Yoga, 11:30 $. Lunch soup, salad, dessert & beverage. Chemical Dependency 1pm: Movie Day. If you have a movie you would like to share, bring it in. 12/7...... LGBTQ Agency Leadership at Executive Leadership Program $. Popcorn and beverages. at St. John Fisher College FEBRUARY 20 12/10...... LGBTQ Substance Abuse Issues at DePaul’s National 10:30 Yoga. 11:30 Leaving Center for lunch at Fox’s Deli 3450 Winton Council on Alcoholism & Drug Dependence 12/11...... SafeZone Training at East House Place, Rochester, NY 14623. Please rsvp by feb. 18 at Center or call 1/13...... LGBTQ Youth and Parenting Issues at Hillside Children’s 585-857-9428. Center FEBRUARY 28 1/14...... SafeZone Train-the-Trainer Certification Program at Golden 10:30 Yoga, 11:30 leave Center to go to Lifespan Downtown Center, West College, California 25 Franklin St. 14604. 1/16...... LGBTQ 101 for two health classes at Marion High School FEBRUARY 27 1/21...... LGBTQ Youth Issues at Respite Program at Villa of Hope 1/22...... Transgender Issues in Healthcare at Genesee Valley Nurses 10:30 Yoga, 11:30 lunch – bring brown bag and beverage. Birthday Association party, cake and beverages. Show and tell. 1/23...... LGBTQ 101 at Nazareth College Human Behavior Class Please note: Programs are subject to change without notice. Go to 1/26...... Sexual Health Panel at First Unitarian Church of Rochester [email protected]. then go to events and click on SAGE events. 1/27...... LGBTQ Panel at St. John Fisher College Look for that day if changes or cancellations should be updated. It is also Quotes from evaluations following our Dec/Jan presentations: your responsibility to drive or carpool to any of our out-of-center • “Stereotypes-Ignore Them! Awesome.” programming. • “I learned about asking clients their pronoun preference.” • “I think that I definitely pre-judged all of the participants and was very surprised at the results. This was very enjoyable.” • “Made what can be an uncomfortable presentation quite comfortable.”

Library H ours: & Archives E very Monday & Wednesday: 6-8pm 875 E. Main Street, (off Prince St. lobby) First Floor, 585-244-8640 OUT AND ABOUT WITH RAINBOW SAGE: The group takes a yoga lesson from Tom Somerville. Photo: Audet Price.

Winter T he Gay Alliance would like to invite you to participate in our SpeakOUT Winter SpeakOUT Training: Providing Successful LGBTQ Education Training The Gay Alliance SpeakOUT Training prepares participants to educate others on LGBTQ issues in a respectful way, to successfully advocate for LGBTQ individuals and to address challenges to full LGBTQ inclusion. SpeakOUT participants become more confident and articulate while talking with others about LGBTQ issues. This is a great experience for someone new to LGBTQ issues or someone who has lived or worked with the issues for years. Think of it as professional development for your life. This training is also the first step in becoming trained as a Gay Alliance Speakers Bureau member. Facilitators: Jeanne Gainsburg, Gay Alliance Education Director and Scott Fearing, Gay Alliance Executive Director, draw upon their 30+ years of LGBTQ training and education experience to facilitate the class. A dynamic mix of interactive exercises and lecture make for a fast-paced, intense and valuable learning experience. The SpeakOUT Training will run on Friday, February 21 from 6-9pm and on Saturday, February 22 from 8:30am-5pm and is $60 per person. It will be held at HCR Homecare (85 Metro Park, Rochester, NY 14623). We only offer this training twice a year and it fills fast, so don’t wait! To register, go to: http://www.gayalliance. org/speakout.html. To ask questions or find out about paying through an invoice to your school, please contact: [email protected] or 585-244-8640 ext. 20. *ASL interpretation available if requested by Feb 10. . 32 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

Action Front Center CNY Depression Bi-Polar Support (Action for a Better Community.) Provides HIV The Depression Bi-Polar Support Alliance of prevention education and case management Central New York Support Group Adult Group Resources services. Training and technical assistance to meets the third Thursday of every month from service providers. Resource library open to 6 p.m.-7:30 p.m. at SAGE Upstate, 431 E. Fay- public. All services free and confidential. Multi- ette St, Syracuse, NY 13202. The Youth Group Check our monthly and ongoing calendar Volunteer Legal Services Project cultural and bilingual staff. 33 Chestnut St., meets the second Monday of every month from as well as the community section for more (585) 232-3051; www.vlsprochester.org. 1 second floor. Hours 8:30-5pm, Monday-Friday. 5 p.m.-6:30 p.m. at Transitions Living Services, groups and events. For further information, West Main St., Suite 500 Rochester, NY 262-4330; fax 262-4572. Free anonymous 420 E. Genesee St., Syracuse, NY 13202. call the Gay Alliance at 244-8640 or visit: 14614. Free legal services for low-income HIV HIV testing on walk-in basis, Tuesdays, www.gayalliance.org. Gay Alliance Youth positive clients. No criminal cases. Appoint- Wednesdays 1-4pm, provided through NYS- Group info: pages 30-31. ments are scheduled at area medical provider DOH. Thursdays 1-4pm at Aenon Baptist TRAN SGenDER locations or by calling 295-5708. Church, 175 Genesee St. Trans*Alliance of Greater Rochester Social/educational group for gender variant BI SEXUality Trillium Health Anthony L. Jordan Health Center, people and friends. Last Saturday, 3-5pm, Trillium Health is the leading provider of HIV/ Prevention and Primary Care. GAGV 5th floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. resources AIDS services in Rochester and the Finger Provides Medical Case Management, Mental www.rnytg.org Lakes. On-site services include HIV testing and AMBI Los Angeles; American Institute of Bisex- Health, Primary Care, HIV Counseling and Test- Volunteer Legal Services Project uality (Journal of Bisexuality); Bay Area Bisexual limited STD screenings, Primary and HIV Spe- ing (using rapid testing) Hepatitis C rapid test- cialty Medical Care, Pharmacy, and many more. (585) 232-3051; www.vlsprochester.org.1 Network; Bi Café; Bi Definition: Milwaukee; ing and services, Educational Presentations, West Main St. Suite 500, Rochester, NY BiNet USA; Bisexual Organizing Project (BOP); Satellite offices in Geneva and Bath. Trillium and access to other Jordan Services. Preven- Health is also a leader in providing services and 14614. Free legal services for low-income cli- Biversity Boston; Boston Bisexual Women’s tion and Primary Care is a walk-in program; no ents seeking a name change. Other legal ser- Network; ComBIne - Columbus, Ohio; Dallas/ education to members of the LGBT community. appointment necessary. Office Hours are Mon- Contact Information: Website: www.trillium- vices for low-income clients include family law Fort Worth Bi Net; Fenway Health’s Bi Health day thru Friday 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. For more issues, bankruptcy, unemployment insurance Program; Los Angeles Bi Task Force; New York healthny.org. Main Office: 259 Monroe Ave., information call (585) 423-2872; fax (585) Rochester, NY 14607; Main Phone: 585-545- hearings, wills and advance directive docu- Area Bisexual Network; Robyn Ochs’s site; 423-2876. Website www.jordanhealth.org. For ments for clients with serious illnesses. Seattle Bisexual Women’s Network; The Bi 7200, Health Services After Hours: 585-258- more information, call the Program Manager Writers Association; The Bisexual Resource 3363; Case Management After Hours (Lifeline): Charlie Lytle,(585) 423-2872. Gay Alliance Youth Gender Identity Center (email [email protected]) 585-275-5151; Fax: 585-244-6456. Finger Support Group Lakes Office: 605 W. Washington St., Geneva, CDC National STD and AIDS Hotline Thursdays 5:30-6:30 GAGV Library, 1st floor, NY 14456, 315-781-6303. Southern Tier 1-800-CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) 24 hours a off Prince St. lobby 875 E. Main St., Ages CULTURAL Office: 122 Liberty St. Box 624, Bath, NY day. TTY service: 1-888-232-6348. E-mail 13-18. 244-8640 address: [email protected]. Rochester Women’s Community Chorus 14810 607-776-9166. The Health Outreach Genesee Valley Gender Variants 234-4441. (See Ongoing calendar). Project: 416 Central Ave., Rochester, NY Fair Housing Enforcement Project Thurs. 7-9pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. 14605; 585-454-5556. Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus of Monroe County [email protected] www.thergmc.org Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 585-325-2500; 1-800-669-9777. Deals with Guys Night Out Referrals to physicians and service agencies. housing discrimination on basis of race, orien- Social group for transmen. Third Saturdays, (585) 244-8640; www.gayalliance.org. tation, HIV status, etc. 1pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguys- dreaf se vices [email protected] Advocacy for Abused Deaf Victims Victory Alliance Public Interest Law Office of Rochester Mailing address: c/o ASADV, P.O. Box 20023, University of Rochester Medical Center. One of 80 St. Paul St., Suite 701. Free legal services Rochester, NY 14602. 24-Hour Hotline: ASAD- several research sites worldwide that comprise to HIV positive persons, families. Spanish bilin- Women [email protected]; VP: 866-936-8976; TTY/ the HIV Vaccine Trials Network. Rochester site gual advocates available. All civil cases except l esbians of color FAX : 585-232-2854. conducts research vaccine studies sponsored divorce; no criminal cases. Ask to speak to www.oursistacircle.com. by National Institutes of Health (NIH). 585-756- someone in PILOR. 454-4060. The first social networking site for lesbians of Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf 2329; www.vaccineunit.org. Black, Asian, African American, Latina, Native (LRAD) Evergreen Health Services, Buffalo Threshold Primary care, HIV and family care, HIV testing American, Pacific Islander, Chicano, Biracial & Meets second Saturdays, 6-9pm. For location, other lesbians of color, launched 2009. OurSis- information: [email protected] At The Community Place, 145 Parsells Ave., and counseling. (716) 847-0328 third floor, 585-454-7530. Provides confiden- taCircle the first free social networking site to Spectrum LGBTIQ & Straight Alliance Westside Health Services offer Skype mental health counseling. No nudity tial HIV, STD testing and General Health Care, Brown Square Health Center, 175 Lyell Ave. RIT/NTID student group. rent/mort- Group to support women living with metastatic free Helpline: 1 866 600-6886. Offers confi- gage/utility payments and limited subsidized breast cancer. Information about breast cancer, Support group for lesbian mommies and wan- dential HIV testing and information. When you nabe mommies in Rochester and surrounding housing. 1945 E. Ridge Rd., Suite 24, Roches- lending library, a monthly educational program. make your appointment, be sure to ask about ter NY 14622. (585) 339-9800. All BCCR programs, support services free. areas. Subscribe: RochesterGayMoms-sub- our sliding scale fees. No one is turned away [email protected]. for lack of ability to pay. Huther Doyle Monroe County Women’s Health 360 East Ave., Rochester 14604. Offers drug, Partnership Lesbian & Gay Family Building Project Rochester Area Task Force on AIDS 111 Westfall Rd., Rochester NY 14692; (585) Headquartered in Binghamton and with a pres- alcohol prevention, education, treatment. Risk A collection of agencies providing a multiplicity Reduction Plus Team offers services to HIV 274-6978. Comprehensive breast cancer ence throughout Upstate NY, the Project is ded- of resources and services to the upstate New screening services for uninsured and underin- icated to helping LGBTQ people achieve their positive and those at risk through substance York community. Their offices are located use. Programs include outreach, transitional sured women. goals of building and sustaining healthy fami- through the Finger Lakes Health Systems lies. Claudia Stallman, Project Director, 124 case management, free cconfidential testing Elizabeth Wende Breast Clinic Agency, which also provides medical literature (OraQuick Rapid Testing). NYS Dep’t. of Health Front St., Binghamton, NY 13905; 607-724- and newspaper clippings, as well as demo- 170 Sawgrass Drive. 442-8432. Dr. Wende 4308; e-mail: [email protected]. Web: offers free on-site confidential and anonymous Logan-Young and an all-woman staff provide graphic and statistical data for use in develop- testing. (585)325-5100, M-F 8am-9pm, www. mammograms. www.PrideAndJoyFamilies.org. ing health care services. (585) 461-3520. hutherdoyle.com. Self Help for Women with Breast or Parents, Families and Friends of The MOCHA Center of Rochester Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) Geneva Community Health Ovarian Cancer (SHARE) Our mission is to improve health and wellness 601 W. Washington St., Geneva. Provides HIV 1-866-53SHARE or 1-866-537-4273. PFLAG’s threefold mission: supporting parents in communities of color. Youth drop-in center, and family members in coming out process; testing, HIV specialty and primary care for resi- Alternatives for Battered Women HIV testing, peer education, support groups, dents of Ontario and surrounding counties. educating the community; advocating on behalf computer lab, referral services and more. 107 232-7353; TTY 232-1741. Shelter (women of LGBT family members. [email protected]; Mon.-Thurs. 9am-5pm; Fridays 9am-noon. only), counseling. Lesbians, gay men welcome. Liberty Pole Way (corner of Pleasant). (585) 315-781-8448. 585-244-8640 x27. 420-1400. Victim Resource Center of Wayne County Adoptive Parent Support Group Monroe County Health Department Newark N.Y. Hotline 800-456-1172; office Monthly potluck lunches. For information, loca- at 855 W. Main St., offers testing and counsel- lgbt health (315)331-1171; fax (315)331-1189. tion, call Shari, 350-2529. ing for HIV and other sexually transmitted dis- For a list of LGBT-friendly and competent Mary Magdalene House eases. (585) 753-5481. health and human service providers in Women’s outreach center for HIV positive Angel Food Ministry the Rochester and Finger Lakes area, Box of fresh/frozen food for $30 in advance. women and women at risk. 291 Lyell Ave. Strong Memorial Hospital visit the resource directory page(s) at Open Mon-Fri. 6:30-9:30pm 458-5728. Menu changes monthly. For information and provides a complete range of HIV medical care, www.everybodysgood.com. distribution sites, call 585 861-4815. including access to experimental treatment pro- Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/ tocols, and HIV testing. Also provides individual Trillium Health Syracuse Region HIS V/AID and group psychotherapy. Training of health See www.trilliumhealthny.org 114 University Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; Toll- care professionals also available. Infectious Dis- HCR Home Care free Helpline: 1-866-600-6886. Planned Par- Free testing for HIV exposure ease Clinic, (585) 275-0526. Department of We provide a full multidisciplinary team consist- enthood has led the way in providing high is available from New York State Department of Psychiatry, (585) 275-3379. AIDS Training ing of nursing, social work, physical, occupational, quality, affordable reproductive health care Health: call Rochester Area Regional Hotline at Project, (585) 275-5693. and speech therapies as well as home health aides since 1916. All services are confidential. (585) 423-8081, or 1 800 962-5063 for pay Accept most insurances; including Medicaid. Planned Parenthood of Rochester and who have completed the eight-hour cultural com- You may qualify for low- to no-cost family plan- phones or calls outside Rochester. Deaf or petency program provided by the Gay Alliance. For hearing impaired people should call (585) 423- Genesee Valley ning services. When you make your appoint- Offers testing and information (585) 546 2595. more information, contact us at 585-272-1930 or ment, ask about our sliding scale fees. No one 8120 (TDD.) New Rapid HIV Testing now avail- visit us online at HCRhealth.com. able in 30-40 minutes! Statewide information Rural HIV testing turned away for lack of ability to pay. can be obtained by calling 1 800 541-AIDS. Anonymous and confidential, in Allegany, Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley Women’s Resource Center Other organizations which provide AIDS-related Livingston, Ontario, Schuyler, Seneca, Steuben, See www.gayalliance.org Resource Directory YWCA, 175 N. Clinton Ave. 546-7740. services are as follows: Wayne or Yates Counties, call 1 800 962-5063. under “Health” for Gay Alliance referrals to phy- sicians and service agencies. february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 33

R ochester Ongoing Calendar AA/NA Gay Alliance Library & Archives, Trans*Alliance of Greater Rochester Mny o da s David Bohnett Cyber Center. Every Mon./Wed. Social/educational group for gender-variant Meetings LORA Coffee Social 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 people, friends. Last Saturdays, 3-5:30pm, Every Monday, 7-9:30pm, Equal Grounds Cof- GAGV fifth floor, 875 E. Main St. Every week there are four regularly Empire Bears fee House, 750 South Ave. For more info: scheduled GLBTI AA and two inclusive http://www.facebook.com/LORACoffeeSocial. Every Wednesday. 6pm dinner at The Win- Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Contact Person: Cathie: Email: tonaire. www.empirebears.com 9am, George Eastman House parking lot.www. NA meetings in Rochester. [email protected]; Phone: 585.313.3037 rochesterfrontrunners.org. Gay Alliance Library & Archives, Empire Bears Potluck Tdyhurs a s 2nd Saturdays, GAGV, 875 E. Main, 5th floor, David Bohnett Cyber Center. Every Mon./Wed. Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 6:30pm greet; 7pm dinner. Bring dish to pass. Tedu s ays Concerns www.empirebears.org. Narcotics Anonymous Born That Way 6:30pm, first Thursday. Ralph, 271-7649 6-7:30pm. AIDS and Recovery 1124 Culver Cross Dresser Support Group Formerly 3rd Presbyterian LGBT Support Group. Gay Alliance Youth Gender Identity Road (Covenant United Methodist Church) This First, 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9:30pm, 34 Meigs St. First Saturdays, 6-9pm, call for location: is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who Support Group 251-2132; [email protected] Carol, 482-3832 or Kaara, 654-7516. Thursdays, 5:30-6:30, GAGV Library, 1st floor, have a desire to stop using. Although it is not specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is wel- Free syphilis testing off Prince St. lobby. 875 E. Main St. Ages Guys Night Out 13-18. 244-8640. GNO, social group for transmen, now meets on coming to people of all sexual orientations and Trillium Health, 259 Monroe Ave., 5-8pm. 442- the second Saturday of the month, @ 1pm @ gender identities, as well as to anyone who is 2220. Pride at Work Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. affected by HIV and AIDS. Rochester Historical Bowling Society First Thursdays, 5:30pm. 1354 Buffalo Road, Rochester 14624, 426-0862. Saturday Night Special Gay AA 7:15pm, Mondays. Clover Lanes, 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd., S. Weed dn s ays 2750 Monroe Ave. (Group is full.) GLOB&L (Gays & Lesbians of Bausch & Men and women. Open meeting. New Freedom/New Happiness Group HIV Positive Men’s Support group Lomb). 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Meets every third Thursday in Area 67 confer- Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) Every Monday, 5pm, Trillium Health Center for 2nd Saturdays, 6-9pm. [email protected] Bus riders: Take the last #18 University bus to Positive Living, 259 Monroe Ave. ence room at the Optic Center. Voice mail: 12 Corners. Use the stop just past the top of 338-8977 Sophia’s Supper Club the hill at Hillside Ave. and before Highland Ave. Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus First and third Saturdays. http://www.inspiritu- Or take the #1 Park Ave. to the corner of East Mondays, 6pm, George Eastman House park- al.biz/online-spiritual-evolution-gro/ and Winton, then walk five minutes south ing lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. 6:30-9pm, 423-0650 (uphill) on Winton. This is an open discussion Steps Beyond Stems meeting. All issues – as they relate to our alco- Crack Support Group, Mondays, 7-8pm, Free confidential walk-in HIV testing Suny da s holism/addiction and recovery – are fair game. 289 Monroe Ave. Every Thursday night, 5-8pm, Trillium Health, Parents Families & Friends of Lesbians 259 Monroe Ave. 442-2220 And Gays (PFLAG) Fi r days Out & Equal Second Thursdays For location: 244-8460; pflag@gayalliance. Tedyu s a s Social/business networking, 5:30-7:30pm. org. Gay Men’s 7:30pm. Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. Charlie’s Group Changing venues. E-mail: fingerlakes@outand- Rochester General Assembly equal.org • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and 2nd Tuesdays. Monthly peer-facilitated support Sundays, Flying Squirrel Community Center, addicts group for married men who have sex with men. Genesee Valley Gender Variants 285 Clarissa St. • Men’s meeting Confidential, free. For time, place: email: char- 7-9pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. GV Crystal Meth Anonymous • Handicapped accessible [email protected]. [email protected] Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. at This is a round-robin discussion meeting. If you are shy about meeting people or speaking up in Women’s Community Chorus Buffalo Women’s Coffee Social Brunswick . Meeting every Sunday in the Rehearsals each Tuesday, 6:30-9pm, Down- basement. a group, you will find this meeting particularly Every Thursday, 7 pm - 9:30pm, Spot Coffee warm and inviting because everyone gets their town United Pres. Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh Shop, 765 Elmwood Ave. Buffalo. For more Unity Fellowship Church Street. 234-4441, www.therwcc.org turn to speak (or pass). As a result, this meet- info: http://www.facebook.com/groups/buf- Sundays, 1:30 pm, Lutheran Church of Peace, ing often runs long, so plan on more than the Free HIV Testing faloles/ Contact Person: Cathie: Email: 125 Caroline St., 14620. 520-6188. usual hour. [email protected]; Phone: 585.313.3037 9am-7pm. Trillium Health, 259 Monroe Ave. Dignity-Integrity 1st Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist with music; Satury da s FRI DAyS 2nd Sunday: 5pm Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Wee dn sdays Word with music; 3rd Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Saturday Night Special Gay Men's AA meeting 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. L.O.R.A Knitting Group Eucharist (quiet); 4th Sunday: 5pm Prayers to Fridays, 7:30-8:30pm, Closed meeting. start the week, followed by potluck supper. Bus riders: The #18 University Ave. bus does Now meeting on the 1st and 3rd Wednesday of Emmanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. the month from 7 to 9:30 p.m. at Cross Roads not go by the church on weekend evenings. Open Arms Metropolitan Community Take the #1 Park Ave. bus to the corner of East Coffee House, 752 South Goodman St. Gay Alliance Youth Church Fridays, 7-9pm, Open Arms MCC, and Winton, then walk five minutes south Identity Group 707 E. Main St. Rochester, 10:30am, 271- 707 E. Main St., 244-8640 8478 (uphill) on Winton. The Identity Group is for LGBT identified indi- • Open meeting, all are welcome, “straight- viduals who have a developmental disability GLBTQI Motorcycle Group Gay Men’s Alcoholics Anonymous Second Fridays, 5:30pm, Various locations. friendly” diagnosis. The group meets Wednesdays 3-4 St. Luke’s/St. Simon Cyrene Church, • Mixed men and women pm at ARC Health Services (2060 Brighton- [email protected]; 467- 6456; [email protected]. 17 S. Fitzhugh St. 8pm, 232-6720, Weekly. • Handicapped accessible, take elevator to Henrietta Townline Rd. 14623). The goal of the Closed meeting basement group is to provide a safe space to discuss LORA 2nd Friday LGBT Potluck Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by identity issues, share personal experiences and 2nd Fridays, 6:30pm - 9:30pm. Please call for Men’s Cooking Group open discussion. increase self-esteem. The group is facilitated location. Bring a friend & a dish to pass! Every- Third or fourth Sundays, 355-7664. by Delaina Fico. LMSW. For more information, one Welcome! Coffee/Tea/Hot Chocolate Sup- LORA LGBT Sunday Brunch please contact Delaina Fico at dfico@arcmon- plied. For more info: http://www.facebook. 1st & 3rd Sundays, 11:30am - 2:30pm. Opa! Suny da s roe.org or 585-271-0661 ext. 1552. com/groups/L.O.R.A.14464/Contact Person: Authentic Greek Koozina, 1175 Jefferson Rd. Step in the Right Direction Gay Alliance Board of Directors Cathie: Email: [email protected]; Phone: For more info: http://www.facebook.com/lora- 7:30-9pm. 1275 Spencerport Road (Trinity Alli- Meets Third Wednesdays, 6pm, 585.313.3037 sundaybrunch Contact Person: Cathie; Email: ance Church) This is an NA meeting that is 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 [email protected]; Phone: 585.313.3037 open to all addicts who have a desire to stop Crystal Meth Anonymous using. Although it is not specifically a gay-ori- New Freedom New Happiness Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. at Gutter Gals - Bowling ented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all AA Gay meeting, 7pm, Unitarian Church, Brunswick. Meeting every Friday 4 pm in the 2nd & 4th Sundays, 6:30pm - 9:30pm. Bowl A sexual orientations and gender identities. Each 220 Winton Rd. Men and women. Open. basement. Roll, 1560 Jefferson Rd. $5.70 for 2 games & week features a reading from NA literature, fol- $2.50 for shoes. For more info: http://www. Support Group for Parents who have lost LORA LGBT Dinner & Movie lowed by discussion. 3rd Fridays, 6pm Dinner followed by a movie facebook.com/groups/guttergals/ Children Contact Person: Cathie: Email: Rochester Gay Men First, 3rd Wednesdays, 11am-12:30pm, we voted on at dinner! Call for location. Bring a friend a join us for dinner & movie night! For [email protected]; Phone: 585.313.3037 8pm. St. Luke/St. Simon’s Episcopal Church, Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. Gene- 17 S. Fitzhugh Street. Bus riders use the see Region Home Care. Free. 325-1880 more info: http://www.facebook.com/groups/ L.O.R.A.14464/Contact Person: Cathie: Email: Fitzhugh Street stop on Main Street at the Coun- COAP [email protected]; Phone: 585.313.3037 ty Office Building and walk south one block. Come Out and Play. Wednesday game nights. • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and 8-11 pm. Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. LORA LGBT Gaymes Night addicts 7pm, [email protected]. 4th Fridays, 7pm - 9:30pm. Please call for • Men’s meeting location. Bring a friend & a snack to share - • NOT handicapped accessible Rochester Rams General Meeting Coffee/Tea/Hot Chocolate Supplied. Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by 2nd Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Bachelor Forum, For more info: http://www.facebook.com/ open discussion. 670 University Ave. www.rochesterrams.com groups/L.O.R.A.14464/Contact Person: Cathie: Email: [email protected]; Phone: Brothers Keeper 585.313.3037 Support group for men over 30. Third Wednes- days, 5:30-7:30pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Lib- erty Pole Way. 420-1400 S ATurDAyS HIV+ Mixed Men’s Group Rochester Rams Bar Night Wednesdays, 11:30 am-12:30 pm. Third Saturdays, 8pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, Trillium Health, 259 Monroe Ave. 670 University Ave. 271-6930 Frontrunners/Frontwalkers LGBT Family Pride Rochester 6pm, Eastman House parking lot. Meets second Saturday of the month, 1-4pm, www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. Crossroads Coffee House, 752 S. Goodman St. Contact Person: Christine O’Reilly Email: [email protected]; sponsored by: LORA - www.loragroup.org 34 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014

FRIY DA 14 Trans*Alliance of Greater Rochester. Empty Closet deadline for March Monthly meeting, 3-5:30 pm, fifth floor issue. 244-9030; [email protected]. Gay Alliance meeting room. Art therapy with Raquel Acevedo-Pagan. S YATurDA 15 Butch Femme Connection. Meet at February Dignity Integrity Winter Cabin Party. Jay’s Diner on Rte. 15 (West Henriet- 4 to 9 pm in Brighton. Hotline at 585- ta Rd.) 7 pm. For further information, S YATurDA 1 THURD S AY 6 234-5092 or check website at www.di- Kerry/Max at (585) 288-7208. rochester.org/ ROMANS nude men only swim, Imbolc, Candlemas. Ancient Celtic Shoulders To Stand On screening. RochesterNYGrrlz. Crossdresser cross-quarter fire feast of Light. Through Free. 5 pm, Helen Wood Hall Audito- Vassar St. Details: website at http://www. group. 4-6 pm, Gay Alliance Nopper wnyromans.com. Email wnyromans@ Feb. 2. Sacred tree: rowan. rium, UR. Room, 5th floor, 875 E. Main St. ROMANS mixed nude swim yahoo.com; inquiry line 585-281-4964. at Harro S YATurDA 8 SNYU DA 16 East. Details: website at http://www.wny- Empire Bears. Potluck in the 5th SNYU DA 23 romans.com. Email wnyromans@yahoo. Dignity-Integrity. Quiet Episcopal Dignity Integrity. Evening Prayer, floor GAGV meeting room, Auditorium Mass in the Chapel. 5 p.m. at St. Luke’s com; inquiry line 585-281-4964. Center, 875 E. Main St. Starts at 6 pm. followed by a Potluck Dinner: “Brinner: and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh Breakfast for Dinner”. 5 pm, St. Luke’s SNYU DA 2 Red Ball. A Steampunk Affaire ben- St. Dignity Integrity. Episcopal Mass/ efitting the Gay Alliance. 7-11 pm, Dip- and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh Healing Service, with music. 5 pm at lomat Banquet Center, 1956 Lyell Ave. FRI1 DAY 2 St. St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. $20 advance; $30 at door. Online tickets: Speak Out Training. 6-9 pm, HCR THURD S AY 27 Fitzhugh St. www.gayalliance.org. Cash only tickets Homecare, 85 Menlo Park. $60/person. St. Jimmy’s Cabaret. Featuring cast of PeaceArt International concert. 4 available at Equal=Grounds, OUTland- Register at www.gayalliance.org; infor- “American Idiot.” Benefit for DVC young pm, Hochstein Performance Hall, 150 S. ish, Parkleigh, Hedonist Artisan Choco- mation at [email protected] or artists, presented by Method Machine. Plymouth St. FREE. “Community Peace lates. More info at redball@gayalliance. 585-244-8640 ext 20. ASL interpretation $30 for VIP tickets, $20 for Adults, $10 Celebration – creating peace through the org. available if requested by Feb. 10. for Students/Seniors. 10:30 pm at RAPA, focus of diversity, collaboration and eco- SNYU DA 9 S YATurDA 22 727 E. Main St. nomic justice”. Dedicated to Rev. Vernice Dignity Integrity. Roman Catholic Speak Out Training. 8:30 am-5 pm, Warfield on her 99th birthday. Please Liturgy of the Word, with music. 5 p.m. HCR Homecare, 85 Menlo Park. $60/ bring donations of nonperishable food at St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 person. Register at www.gayalliance.org; for Baden Street Settlement, area shelters. S. Fitzhugh St. information at SpeakOUT@gayalliance. Contact: [email protected] org or 585-244-8640 ext 20. ASL inter- WED EDN S AY 12 pretation available if requested by Feb. 10. TUED S AY 4 Susan B. Anthony Birthday Luncheon. The Social Grind. New social group. Presented by Susan B. Anthony Museum Tuesday mornings from 10 am-12 noon & House. Keynote speaker: Louise W. at Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. and Knight, author, lecturer, and historian. Thursday evenings from 7:30-9:30 pm at Rochester Riverside Convention Center. Spot Coffee, 200 East Ave. DHutch457@ aol.com THURD S AY 13 Out & Equal Second Thursdays WED EDN S AY 5 Networking Event. 5:30-7:30 pm, 140 MuCCC New Play Festival. Five Alex Bar & Grill. 50/50 raffle to benefit plays through Feb. 7. Tickets for all shows Pride 2014. are available at www.MuCCC.org; $8/ advance, $10/door (per show). MuCCC, 142 Atlantic Ave. Classifieds A SK EM BY JUSTIN HUBBELL Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional 10 words is another $1. We do not bill for classifieds, so please send or bring ad and payment to: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Roch- ester, New York 14605. Paying by check: checks must be made out to Gay Alliance. The deadline is the 15th of the month, for the following month’s issue. We cannot accept ads over the phone. Pay when you place your ad. We will accept only ads accompanied by name and phone number. Neither will be published, but we must be able to confirm placement. The Empty Closet is not responsible for financial loss or physical injury that may result from any contact with an advertiser. Advertisers must use their own box number, voice mail, e-mail or personal address/phone number.

ANNOUNCEMENTS Wedding Space and clergy services Children’s Ministry thriving at Open available. Celebrate your special day at Arms Metropolitan Community Church Open Arms Metropolitan Community for toddlers to ‘tweens. Join us for vibrant, Church 740 Marshall Rd. off Chili Ave. inclusive, progressive worship on Sundays [email protected] (585) 271-8478 at 10:30am. 740 Marshall Road off Chili Handyman: Simple repairs or full Avenue. [email protected] (585) renovations, no job is too large or small. 271-8478. Carpentry, Plumbing, Electrical, Interi- I got engaged and need help planning or & Exterior. 35 years experience. Call our wedding. Me and Adam need help Alan & Bill 585-204-0632 or cell 304- finding gay-friendly places for cake, recep- 517-6832. tion, etc. [email protected]. Martin Ippolito master electrician. Electrical work, telephone jacks, cable SR E VIceS TV, burglar alarm systems, paddle fans. Hate to paint or clean gutters? I 585-266-6337. have tall ladders! Dale’s Pleasure Painting & Gutter Cleaning has very reasonable FOR RENT rates for painting year round and gutter Three rooms for rent & 1 family cleaning. Average price to paint a room room large enough for a studio. 4 bed- is $150 plus paint. 585-576-5042. Email room home with 2 bathrooms. Located in [email protected]. Brighton/Twelve Corners area. Students Man to Man Rubdown. Relax with and Grad Students welcome, convenient this experienced, fit, healthy. middle- to UofR, RIT, Nazareth, St. John Fisher. aged, non-smoking GWM. Central Separated / Divorced men straight, gay location. Private home. Incalls/outcalls. or bi are preferred and welcome. Cen- Reasonable rates. cell#585-773-2410 or trally located with easy access to 390, 590 home#585-235-6688. and 490, Elmwood, Winton and Mon- Ask questions. Established life coach roe. No drugs, must be responsible. See opens your direction about goals, ques- add on Craigslist or contact write me at tions, issues using classic tarot symbology [email protected] or call 585-286- and fascinating, confidential discussion. 1269. Send pic with a little bit about your- $65/hour in your home/office. kivawyan- self and your room/roommate needs so it’s [email protected] a good fit for everyone. february 2014 • number 475 • the gay alliance • the empty closet 35

The Empty Closet is published by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500 Bed & Breakfast Rochester, New York 14605 © 2014, All rights reserved. Editor-in-Chief: Susan Jordan Staff Reporter: Ove Overmyer Graphic Design: Jim Anderson Ad Sales: Brandon Brooks ([email protected] Advertising policy: The Empty Closet does not print advertisements that contain nude drawings or photographs, nor does it print advertising that states that the person pictured in the ad is for sale, or that you will “get” that particular person if you patronize the establishment advertised. Advertisements that are explicitly racist, sexist, ageist, ableist or homo- phobic will be refused; advertisements from organizations that are sexist, racist, ageist, ableist or anti-gay will also be refused. All political advertisements must contain infor- mation about who placed them and a method of contact. Additionally, The Empty Closet does not print negative or “attack” advertisements, whether they relate to a product or politics and no matter in whose interest the ad is being produced. A negative advertisement is defined as one that focuses upon a rival product, or in the political area, a rival election candidate or party, in order to point out sup- posed flaws and to persuade the public not to buy it (or vote for him or her). The Empty Closet maintains, within legal boundaries, neutrality regarding products, political candidates and parties. However, “attack” ads that fail to provide undisputable evidence that the information in the ad is true do not further in any way the objectives and policies of the Gay Alliance or The Empty Closet, includ- ing the primary tenet that The Empty Closet’s purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community and to provide an impartial forum for ideas. Submissions: For publication, submit news items, ads, photos, letters, stories, poetry, ads, photographs or art by mail or in per- son to The Empty Closet office by the 15th of the month. Design services for non-camera ready ads are available for a fee. 244-9030, [email protected] Publication Information: The Empty Closet is published 11 times a year (Decem- ber and January combined) by The Empty Closet Press for the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc. Approxi- mately 5000 copies of each issue are distributed during the first week of the month, some by mail in a plain sealed envelope. The publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles is not an indication of the sexual or affectional orientation of that person or the members of that organization. For further informa- tion, please write to The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main St., Rochester NY. 14605, call (585) 244-9030 or e-mail emp- [email protected]. The Empty Closet is the official publication of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc., as stated in the bylaws of that organization. Its purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community about local and national gay- related news and events; to provide a forum for ideas and creative work from the local gay community; to help pro- mote leadership within the community, and to be a part of a national network of lesbian and gay publications that exchange ideas and seek to educate. Part of our purpose is to maintain a middle position with respect to the entire community. We must be careful to present all viewpoints in a way that takes into consid- eration the views of all – women, men, people of color, young and old, and those from various walks of life. The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessar- ily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. The Empty Closet shall not be liable for any loss or expense that results from the publication (whether correctly or incorrectly) or omission of an ad. In the event of non-payment, your account may be assigned to a collection agency or an attorney, and will be liable for the charges paid by us to such collection agency or attorney. Letters to the editor: The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other con- tributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. We will print letters at the edi- tor’s discretion and on a space available basis. Only one letter by the same writer in a six-month period is allowed. We will not print personal attacks on individuals, nor will we be a forum for ongoing disputes between individuals. We reserve the right to edit for space and clarity. We will print anonymous letters if the name and phone number are provided to the Editor; confidentiality will be respected. Submissions are due by the 15th of the month at: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605; e-mail: [email protected]. The online edi- tion of EC is available at www.gayalliance.org.

PFLAG meets the 3rd Sunday of each month Meetings are at Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church, 707 E. Main St., Rochester, NY 14605 from 1 to 3pm. Questions? Call: 585-244-8640 and leave a Wine. Liquor. Free Tastings message, or e-mail: 661 South Ave • 585.319.5159 [email protected] southwedgespiritsandwine.com Join us! Mon-Sat: 11am-9pm / Sun: Noon-6pm 36 the empty closet • the gay alliance • number 475 • february 2014