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Open Bettinger Dissertation.Pdf The Pennsylvania State University The Graduate School Department of Adult Education GAY MEN AT MIDLIFE AND ADULT LEARNING: AN UNEASY TRUCE WITH HETERONORMATIVITY A Thesis in Adult Education by Thomas Vincent Bettinger © 2007 Thomas Vincent Bettinger Submitted in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree of Doctor of Education May 2007 The thesis of Thomas Vincent Bettinger was reviewed and approved* by the following: Edward W. Taylor Associate Professor of Adult Education Thesis Advisor Chair of Committee Elizabeth J. Tisdell Associate Professor of Adult Education Holly Angelique Associate Professor of Community Psychology Patricia Bullock Assistant Professor of Education Ian Baptiste Associate Professor of Education In Charge of Graduate Programs in Adult Education *Signatures are on file in the Graduate School iii ABSTRACT Framed from a social constructivist perspective and informed by queer theory, this qualitative narrative inquiry was undertaken to explore how self-identified gay men negotiate midlife in a heteronormative society. In their own words and through their own stories, thirteen gay men between the ages of 40 and 60 relate lived experiences which explicate ways in which they both adhere to and resist societal and cultural expectations and understandings as to what it means to be an aging gay man. The findings have implications for adult development and adult education, two fields in which this group has largely been ignored. iv TABLE OF CONTENTS LIST OF TABLES.......................................................................................................…ix ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS.........................................................................................….x Chapter 1. INTRODUCTION……………………………………………………….….1 Background of the Study………………………………………………………...1 Conceptual Framework…………………………………………………………10 Statement of the Problem……………………………………………………… 13 Research Questions……………………………………………………………..15 Overview of Design and Methodology…………………………………………16 Significance……………………………………………………………………..17 Definition of Terms………………………………………………………...….. 20 Assumptions of the Study………………………………………………………23 Strengths and Limitations………………………………….……………………25 Chapter Summary……………………………………………………………….27 Chapter 2. REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE…………………………….…………..29 Introduction……………………………………………………………………..29 Social Constructivism…………………………………………………………...30 Social Constructs………………………………………………………..32 Discourses as Factors in the Creation of Knowledge……………………35 Queer Theory……………………………………………………………………37 Queer…………………………………………………………………….38 Exploring Queer Theory…………………………………………………39 Queer Theory and Identity………………………………………………44 Criticisms of Queer Theory……………………………………………...48 v Research Relating to Sexual Minorities……………………………………….. 51 Research Topics with Implications for Midlife Gay Men…………….. 54 Salience of LGBTQ Research to Education…………………………….56 Adult Development……………………………………………………………..60 Adult Development and Adult Education………………………………60 Overview of Adult Development Theories……………………………...63 Stage theories of adult personality change………………………63 Life event or lifespan approaches……………………………….66 Midlife as a Social Construct……………………………………………68 Research on Midlife Gay Men…………………………………………..71 Dearth of empirical research……………………………………. 71 Generativity…………………………………………………….. 73 Research on Aging and “Older” Lesbians and Gay Men………………..76 Cohorts………………………………………………………….. 81 Successful aging………………………………………………….82 Lifespan developmental approaches……………………………..86 Chapter Summary…………………………..……………………………………88 Chapter 3. METHODOLOGY…………………………………………………………. 91 Research Purpose and Problem…………………………………………………. 91 Overview of Research Kind…………………………………………………….. 92 Overview of Research Type……………………………………………………..94 Research Questions……………………………………………………………. 102 Background of the Researcher………………………………………………….103 Participant Selection Procedures………………………………………………..105 Data Collection Procedures and Methods………………………………….…..107 Interviewing…………………………………………………………… 108 Documents……………………………………………………………...112 Researcher Notes……………………………………………………….113 Ethics and Informed Consent…………………………………………………...114 vi Data Analysis Procedures………………………………………………………115 Verification……………………………………………………………………..118 Chapter Summary………………………………………………………………122 Chapter 4. BIOGRAPHIES OF THE PARTICIPANTS………………………………123 Introduction……………………………………………………………………. 123 General Demographics………………………………………………………… 124 The Participants……………………………………………………………….. 126 Scott…………………………………………………………………… 127 Ray…………………………………………………………………….. 129 Ben…………………………………………………………………….. 132 Jeremy…………………………………………………………………. 135 Steed…………………………………………………………………… 138 Jeff……………………………………………………………………... 140 Joe…………………………………………………………………… 143 Mike…………………………………………………………………….146 George…………………………………………………………………..149 Andy……………………………………………………………………151 Duncan………………………………………………………………….154 Don……………………………………………………………………...156 Mitch……………………………………………………………...…… 159 Chapter Summary……………………………………………………………....161 Chapter 5. FINDINGS…………………………………………………………………162 Introduction……………………………………………………………………..162 The Intersection of Midlife, Gay, and Male……………………………………165 History of Heterosexual Dating and Relationships…………………….165 Societal expectation, experimentation, and exploration………..166 Previous heterosexual marriage as social expectation………….168 Acceptance of “This is who I am”…………………………………….. 171 Giving up pretenses…………………………………………….171 High level of contentment………………………………………174 Midlife as a continuous process………………………………...177 Tension between Fitting In and Being “Too Out”……….…………………….180 Iterative and contextual nature of coming out……...…………. 181 vii Situationally confronting homophobia…………………………184 Aversion to “activism”…………………………………………187 Personal sphere of influence……………………………………189 Reconciling Religious Tension…………………………………………192 Source of conflict/struggle and solace………………………….193 “Make it my own” within a religious context..…………………194 Spiritual perspective exclusive of formal religion……………...196 Belonging and Community……………………………………………..202 Learning from key others…………………………………….....202 Inclusive social networks……………………………………….205 Changing nature of social interaction at midlife………………..210 Sex, intimacy, and relationships………………………………..213 Contemporary Socio-political Issues…………………………………………...218 Gay Marriage…………………………………………………………...218 HIV/AIDS………………………………………………………………222 The Internet……………………………………………………………..227 Ageism………………………………………………………………….232 Chapter Summary………………………………………………………………234 Chapter 6. DISCUSSION AND IMPLICATIONS OF FINDINGS…………………..236 Introduction…………………………………………………………………….236 Discussion of Findings…………………………………………………………237 An Uneasy Truce with Heteronormativity: Revisiting the Conceptual Framework……………………………………………………...237 Diverse Developmental Pathways……………………………………...242 Convergence of Disparate Pathways at Midlife………………………..249 Generativity and Integrity…………………………………………….. 255 Midlife as a Context for Ongoing Learning and Continuous Change… 258 Salience of Using Narrative Inquiry……………………………………260 Sexuality as a Site of Learning…………………………………………263 Implications for Practice………………………………………………………..265 Implications for Further Research……………………………………………...271 viii Final Reflections……………………………………………………………….276 REFERENCES…………………………………………………………………………277 Appendix A: Informed Consent Form……………….…………………………………324 Appendix B: Interview Guide………………………………………………………..…326 ix LIST OF TABLES Table 1: Participant Demographics…………………………………………….125 Table 2: Outline of Findings……………………………………………………164 x ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Wow, where does one even begin? Since starting this doctoral program, I have encountered so many wonderful and gifted people, current students and graduates alike, who have been willing to share their knowledge, experiences, and spirits with me. I’m not sure they all know how important they have been, and remain, to me. Through conferences, I've also been fortunate in having met many awesome students from other programs, members of the professoriate, and adult education practitioners who have added deeply and richly to my own learning and development. I’ve engaged with other scholars, across a variety of disciplines, only through their inspiring and thought- provoking writings. While it would be daunting to try to list each of these individuals, they have my gratitude nonetheless. Certainly, however, some individuals warrant specific mention. First and foremost, I have to acknowledge Adult Ed faculty at Penn State Harrisburg—each of embodies the essence of “adult educator,” and each of whom has been a true ally in my learning. Throughout the course my studies, Dr. Daniele Flannery was there to help me set sail and correct course when needed. For that she has my sincere thanks and admiration. So too do Dr. Libby Tisdell who provided me with terrific opportunities to co-teach, co-present, and co-author—not to mention some great discussions; and Dr. Ed Taylor, who as my advisor and committee chair, has been there for and with me every step of the way. Special thanks also to Dr. Holly Angelique and Dr. Patti Bullock for their insight and guidance, and who—together with Dr. Taylor and Dr. Tisdell--make up just about the finest committee a doctoral student could wish for. xi My friends and family have been quite supportive throughout this process, and I suspect they will be happy when I will be talking about things other than my dissertation. Additionally, I would certainly be remiss if I failed to acknowledge the significant contributions of the 13 men who participated in the study. It was a privilege hearing
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