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ETER B KYNE P .

. 2 1 1 411 icr v ed includin tha t o tra nslation n hq , g f

or - i n la n ua es includin intq f g g g g , g S candinavian .

Pr inted in U. S . ! . D E D I C A T I O N

TH IS LITTLE BOOK IS DEDICAT ED TO T HE MEMORY OF MY DE D CH I EF BRIG DI ER A , A

GE ER EROY s . YO SOMETIME N AL L L N , COMMANDER OF T H E 65T H FI ELD AR TI ERY BRIG DE OT H D IVI SIO LL A , 4 N , U ITED ST TES RMY N A A .

HE PRACTICED AND PREACH ED A RE LIGION OF LOYALTY T o T H E COU NTRY D THE PPOI TED T SK WT AN H A N A , A EVER

IT M IGHT BE .

T HE G O - G E T T E R

L K k Co st A D N . no n a R . E P RIC S , w in Pacific wholesale lumb er and shipping circles as h ad Cappy Ricks, more troubles than a hen with ‘ m ke r e ar d c . ducklings . He as mu h to Mr Skinner, president and general manager o f the Ricks Lo g L r ging umbering Company, the corpo ate entity ’ which represented C ap p y s vast lumber interests ! and he fairly barked the information at Captain

s o n- in- Matt Peasley, his law and also president and o f an manager the Blue Star Navigation Company, other corporate entity which represented the Ricks ri interest in the Ame can mercantile marine .

- Mr . Skinner received this information in silence . not He was related to Cappy Ricks . But Matt e h P asley sat down , crossed his legs and matc ed

- in- glares with his mercurial father law . “ ” Yo u ! s have troubles he jeered, with emphasi “ on the pronoun . Have you got a misery in your

' o r back, is Herbert Hoover the wrong man f o r ” Secretary o f Commerce ? 9 THE G O- GETTER

” o ur . y s a rcasm , young feller, Cappy “ ’ - shrilled . You kno w dad blamed well it isn t a ’ question of health o r politics . It s the fact that in my Old ag e I find mys elf totally surrounded by the choicest aggregation of mental duds since Aj ax ” defied the lightning . “ Meaning whom ? ” “ ” You and Skinner. “ ” Why, what have we done ? Y o u argued me into taking o n the management

n freighters, and no soo er do we have them allo c ated to us than , a near panic hits the country, to i e n freight rates go glory, mar n e gineers go on strike and every infernal young whelp we send out to take charge o f one of o ur offices in the Orient ’ promptly gets the swelled head and thinks h e s divinely ordained to drink up all the synthetic Scotch whiskey manufactured in Japan for the ri benefit of thirsty Ame cans . In my old age you two have forced us into the position o f having to ? c e ’ fire folks by cable . Why Be aus we re break ’ ing into a game that can t be played o n the home r A lo t g ounds . of our business is so far away we ’ ” can t c o ntrol it. Matt Peasley leveled an accusing fing er at “ Cappy Ricks . We never argued you into taking over the management o f those Shipping Board THE GO- GETTER 1 1

’ h Y t e . o u boats . We argued me into it . I m goat i r have nothing to do with it . You ret red ten yea s s ag o . All the troubles in the "marine end of thi ” shop belong on old settler . " "f “ l — u Th eof é tic alfi 7 e§ ACtually no . I hope yo " no t ex ect as do / p me to abandon mental as well f ' G ea ! physical e fort . r t Wampus Cats Am I to be denied a sentimental interest in matters where I have a controlling financial interest ? I admit you two boys are running my affairs and ordinarily n — — you ru them rather well , but but ahem ! ’ - h - h ! o Harumph What s the matter with y u,

? o u ? Matt And y , also, Skinner If Matt makes a ’ a ob him i o f r mist ke, it s your j to remind it befo e s ? the result manifest themselves, is it not And

o u vice versa . Have y two boobs lost your ability l ? ” to juWdge men , or did you everWhave such abi ity r ” ffic e l dar e O . y say, Mr “ ’ I am , Skinner . And I m here to remind you that ’

to o ur . if we d stuck own game, which is coas twise

- fi shipping, and had left the trans Paci c field with ’ r its general cargoes to othe s, we wouldn t have any Shanghai Office at this moment and we would not be pestered by the Hendersons of this world . “ ’ ’ ” e He s the best lumber, salesman we v ever had,

r e . . Mr . Skinne def nded had every hope that he THE G O- GETTER would send us orders for many a cargo for Asiatic ” delivery . “And he had gone through every job in this Of f fice, from o fice boy to sales manager in the lum ber department and from freight clerk to passen ” ger agent in the navigation company, Matt Peas ley supplemented . ul I admit all of that . But did you cons t me when you decided to send him out to China on his own ? ” “ ’ f Of cours e not . I m boss o the Blue Star Navi

atio n no ? g Company, am I t The man was in charge of the Shanghai office before you ever opened your f ” mouth to dischar ge your cargo O free advice . “ ’ I told you then that Henderson wouldn t make ’ ? ” good, didn t I “Y o u did . “ And now I have an oppor tunity to tell you th e ’ little tale you didn t give me an opportunity to tell you before you sent him out . Henderson was — — a good man a crackerjack man when he had a — ’ better man over him . But I ve been twenty years reducing a tendency o n the part of that fel ’ ’ - low s head to bust his hat band . And now he s gone south with a hundred and thirty thousand ” taels o f o ur Shanghai bank account . “ ” Permit me to remind you, Mr . Ricks, Mr. Skin THE G O- GETTER 1 3

“ ner cut in coldly, that he was bonded to the extent ” of a quarter o f a million dollars . “ f n . ut . Not a peep o o you, Skin er Not a peep ’ Permit me to remind you that I m the little genius who placed that insurance unknown to yo u and

Matt . And I recall now that I was reminded by r you, Matthew, my son, that I had retired ten yea s ul in ago and please, wo d I quit interfering in the f ” ternal administration Of your O fice . “ o - es Well, I must admit y ur far sightedn s in that instance will keep the Shanghai o ffiée out o f ” “ the red ink this year, Matt Peasley replied . How ever, we face this situation, Cappy . Henderson has drunk and gambled and signed chits in excess ’ of his salary . He hasn t attended to business and he’ s capped his inefficiency by absconding with our ’ b ank ac c o unt . We couldn t foresee that . When x we send a man o ut to the Orient to be o ur manager there, we have to trust him all the way o r not at

. S o all there is no use weeping over spilled milk,

Cappy . Our j ob is to select a successor to Hen der s o n and send him out to Shanghai o n the next ” boat . “ ” ~ Oh, very well, Matt, Cappy replied magnani “ ’ mo usl u ’ y, I ll not rub it into yo . I suppose I m far u from generous, bawling yo out like this . Perhaps, when you’ re my age and have had a lot of mental and moral cripples nip yo u and draw blood as o ften 1 4 THE G O- GETTER as they’ ve drawn it on me you’ll be a better judge than I of men worthy o f the weight of r es p o nsibil t . r a o ity Skinne , h ve you g a candidate for this ” j ob ? “ ir h A f I regret to say s , I ave not . ll o the men , — in my department are quite young too young for ” the responsibility . “ — ? ” What do you mean young Cappy blazed . Well the only man I would consider fo r the , — j o b is Andres and he is to o young about thirty, ” I should sa y . “ r ? o u About thi ty, eh Strikes me y were about twenty - eight when I threw ten thousand a year e f at you in actual cash , and a coupl o million dol ’ ” r la s worth o f responsibility . “ Yes, sir, but then Andrews has never been tested “ ” Skinner, Cappy interrupted in his most awful “ ’ voice, it s a constant source of amazement to me h w y I refrain from firing you . You say Andrews ’ ? has never been tested . Why hasn t he been teste d

We Why are maintaining untested material in this ? ? shop, anyhow Eh Answer me that . Tut, tut, N ‘ h ! o t f o u . tut a peep out o y , sir If you ad done your Christianduty,you would have taken a year ’ s vacation when lumber was selling its elf in 1 91 9 and 1 920 and u n , yo would have left Andrews sitti g THE GO- GETTER 1 5

’ in at your des k to see th e sort of s tuff h e s made ” of .

’ “ It’ s a mighty lucky thing I didn t g o away fo r ” “ r a yea , Skinner protested respectfully, because — — ’ th e market broke like that and if you dont think we have to hustle to sell sufficient lumber

to keep our own ships busy freighting iff “ o u ? Ho w Skinner, how dare y contradict me Old was Matt Peasley when I turned over the Blue a St r Navigation Company to him, lock, stock and ’ - n ld . barrel ? Why, he was t twenty six years o ’ d ! o u wh o Skinner, you re a do o The killjoys like y have straddled the neck of industry and throttled it with absurd theories that a man ’ s back must be

bent like an ox - b o w and his loc ks snowy white b e fore he can be entrusted with responsibility and a o f living wage, have caused all our wars and strikes . ’ ’ This is a young man s world, Skinner, and don t

h e - e er you ever forget it . T g o g tt s o f this world are ” thirt e r f a s o . y age Matt, he concluded , L “ —p Q n. y ” n m n - under fi ” “ w - m “ - - rni . so nin tu ng to his law, what do you think 0 ” i Andrews for that Shanghai j o b ? ? “ ’ ” I think he ll do . “ ’ ” Why do you think he ll do ? “ a ’ Bec use he ought to do . He s been with us long enough to have acquired s ufficient experience to enable him

“Has h e uir r a acq ed the cou age to t ckle the job , 1 6 THE G O- GETTER

” “ ’ r e Matt ? Cappy inter upt d . That s more impor tant than this doggoned experience yo u and Skin ” ner prate so much about . “ I know nothing of his courage . I as sume that he has force and initiative . I know he has a pleas ing pers onality .

Well, before we send him out we ought to know ” r f ni whethe or no he has orce and i tiative . “ ” “ as Then, quoth Matt Pe ley, rising, I wash my ’ of r n r hands of the job selecting Hende so s successo . ’ You ve butted in, so I suggest you name the lucky ” man . “ ” “ ’ it’ Yes, indeed, Skinner agreed . I m sure s quite beyond my poor abilities to uncover Andrews’ force and initiative on such short notice . He does poss ess sufficient force and initiative for his pres ent job, but “ But will he possess force and initiative when he has to make a quick decision six thousand o r miles from expert advice, and stand fall by that ’ decision ? That s what we want to know, Skin ” ne r .

“ ” s s ir . r l I sugge t, , Mr Skinner eplied with chi l “ a . politeness , that you conduct the ex mination “ th e I accept the nomination, Skinner. By Holy

Pink- teed Prophet ! The next man we send out to that Shanghai office is going to be a go getter . THE G O- GETTER 1 7

’ We ve had three managers go rotten on us and ’ ” that s three too many .

And without further ado, Cappy swung his aged legs up o n to his desk and slid down in his swivel a ch ir until he rested on his spine . His head sank b on his breast and e closed his eyes . “ ’ He s framing the examination for Andrews ,

Matt Peasley whispered, as he and Skinner made their exits . ’ HE Presiden t emeritus Of the Ricks interests no t to was destined uninterrupted cog itation, however . Within ten minutes his private exchange

Operator called him to the telephone . ‘ ” is ? th What it Cappy yelled into e transmitter . “ ffi There is a young man in the general o ce .

His name is Mr . William E . Pec k and he desires to u ” see yo personally . “ ” “ Cappy sighed . Very well, he replied . Have ” h im shown in . f Almost immediately the o fice boy ushered Mr. ’ Peck into C ap p y s presence . The moment he was fairly inside the door the visitor halted, came easily and naturally to “attention” and bowed respect fully, while the cool glance of his keen blue eyes held steadily the autocrat of the Blue Star Naviga tion Company . “ — l Mr i i . Ricks, Peck s my name, sir Wi liam E di r . u Peck Thank yo , sir, for acce ng to my equest ” f o r aninterview . “ - - l r Ahem ! Hum m m Cappy looked bel ige ent . “ ” Mr . . Sit down, Peck THE G O- GETTER 1 9

ro Mr . Peck sat down, but as he c ssed to the chair ’ a beside C p p y s desk, the old gentleman noticed that his visitor walked with a slight limp , and that his left forearm had been amputated half way

b . r to the el ow To the obse vant Cappy, the Ameri L ’ can egion button in Mr . Peck s lapel told the

“ W ” “ i ell , Mr. Peck, he quer ed gently, what can I do for you ? ” “ ’ ” o b I ve called for my j , the veteran replied briefly . “ ” By the Holy Pink - toed Prophet ! Cappy ej ac u “ e ’ lat d, you say that like a man who doesn t expect , ” to be refused . “ Q . no t . uite right, sir I do anticipate a refusal “ ? ”

Why 1 ’ Mr . William E . Peck s engaging but somewhat plain features rippled into the Wing ! “ Cappy Ricks had ever seen . I am a sales ” “ r . Ricks, he replied . I know that state to ment be true because I have demonstrated, over o f a period five years, that I can sell my share of

. h ckabl anything that has a o e value . I have always found, however, that before proceeding to sell goods I had to sell the manufacturer o f those goods — - wit m something, to myself I am about to sell y ” e u s lf to yo . ' ” S o n m “ u in ’ , said Cappy s ilingly, yo w . You ve 20 THE G O- GETTER

di sold me already . When d they sell yo u a mem b ers hip in the military forces of the United States ” o f America ? “ On o f il 7th 1 91 7 . the morning Apr , , sir o ur clinches sale . I soldiered with the K of Columbus at Camp earny myself, but they refused to let me go abroad with my di /isio n s o x my heart was broken, I went over the ” hill . I ' That little touch fl f the language o f the line ’ h ai' t appeared to w Peck s e considerably , on b establishing at a free mas ry etween them . w ’ “ L I was with the Portland umber Company, ”M ll n ” s e i g lumber in the Middle West before the war, “U he explained . ncle Sam gave me my sheepskin

at Letterman General Hospital last week, with ’ half dis ability o n my ten thousand dollars worth

a o f government insurance . Whittling my wing w s

r e a me e trifle, but my broken leg was a long tim ’ no w mending, and it s shorter than it really ought

to be . And I developed pneumonia with influenza

and they found some T . B . indications after that . I ’ ve been at the government tuberculosis hospital

F . at ort Bayard, New Mexico, for a year However, ’ ’ what s left of me is certified to be sound . I ve got

five inches chest expansion and I feel fine . “ ” No t at all blue or discouraged ? Cappy h az

arded .

2 2 THE G O- GETTER

' was very kind . He said he felt that he o wed me a ’ job, but business is so bad he couldn t make a place i for me . He told me he is now carry ng a dozen ’ ex - service men merely b ecause he hasn t the heart to let them go . I believe him . “ —m Well, my dear boy y dear young friend ! ” Wh o u ? y do y come to me “ ” “ e Because, Mr. P ck replied smilingly, I want

- you to go over their heads and g ive me a j ob . I ’ don t care a hoot what it is, provided I can do it . ’ If I can do it, I ll do it better than it was ever done ’ ’ before, and if I can t do that I ll q uit to save you ’ the embarrassment of firing me . I m not an obj ect ’ of charity, but I m scarcely the man I used to be and I ’ m four years behind the procession and have o f to catch up . I have the best references “ ” o u I see y have, Cappy cut in blandly, and

- pressed the push button on his desk . Mr . Skinner di I Tilliam entered . He glanced sapprovingly at

E . Peck and then turned inquiring eyes toward

Capp y Ricks . “ ” r e Skinner, dear boy, Cappy pur d amiably, “ I’ ve been thinking over the proposition to send ’ o ut f e Andrews to the Shanghai o fice , and I ve com ’ to this conclusion . We ll have to take a chance . At the present time that office is in charge o f a ’ s o t o n tenographer, and we ve g to get a manager ’ ob r o f the j without fu ther loss time . So I ll tell T HE G O- 23 , GETTER

’ ’ o n you what we ll do . We ll send Andrews out the i next boat, but inform him that his pos tion is tem ’ r r p o a y . Then if he doesn t make good out there we can ta ke him back into this office where he is a — , e ! - m - m ! most valuable man . Meanwhil ahem hum — ’ Harumph meanwhile, you d oblige me greatly, o u Skinner, my dear boy, if y would consent to take this young man into your office and give him a good ’ - f f r work out to see the stu f he s made o . As a favo ” to n b o me, Ski ner, my dear y, as a favor to me . S Mr . Skinner, in the language of the po rting

f r — o it. world, was down the count and knew

. to o Young Mr Peck knew it , and smiled graciously upon the general manager, for young Mr . Peck had l b een in the army, where one of the firs t great les sons to be assimilate d is this ! that the command ’ ing general s request is always tanta mount to an order. “ ” Very well , sir, Mr . Skinner replied coldly . “ Have yo u arranged the compensation to be given ? ” Mr . Peck “ dc Cappy threw up a deprecating hand . That o n F u . r tail is entirely up to y , Skin er a be it from me to interfere in the internal administration of your department . Naturally you will pay Mr. Peck ” n what he is worth and not a cent more . He tur ed i “ r . o to the t umphant Peck N w, you listen to me , ’ young feller . If you think you re slipping g race 24 THE G O- GETTER

t f t fully into a good hing, disabuse your mind o tha n ’ impres sion right o w. You ll step right up to the ’ e s o n o n plat , my , and you ll hit the ball fairly the ’ nose, and you ll do it early and often . The first ’ o u time y tip a foul , you ll be warned . The second ’ ’ time yo u do it you ll get a month s lay - OE to think ’ — fo r . it over, and the third time you ll be out keeps Do I make myself clear ? ” “ ” “ You do, sir, Mr . Peck declared happily . All ’ I ask is fighting room and I ll b ack my way into ’

. o u . f . o r Mr Skinner s heart Thank y , Mr Skinner, consenting to take me o n. I appreciate your action very, very much and shall endeavor to be worthy ” o f your confidence . “ Young sco undrel ! In- fer- nal young scoundrel “ Cappy murmured to himself . He has a sense o f

G o d ! old - humor, thank Ah , poor narrow gauge Skinner ! If that fellow ever gets a new o r unc o n ’ enti na v o l thought in his stodgy head, it ll kill him ’ overnight . He s hopping mad right now, because ’ o wn he can t say a word in his defense, but if he ’ doesn t make hell look like a summer holiday fo r ’ to Mr . Bill Peck, I m due be mercifully chloro L h o w formed . Good ord, empty life would be if I ’ couldn t butt in and raise a little riot every once in ” so Often . r Young M . Peck had risen and was standing at THE G O- GETTER 25

“ ” ? b e attention . When do I report for duty, sir queried o f Mr . Skinner . “ ’ ” e Whenever you re ready, Skinner r torted with a t a wintry smile . Mr . Peck glanced at cheap wris “ ’ ’ ” no w watch . It s twelve o clock , he soliloquized “ ’ t . o o u aloud I ll p p , wrap myself around some rations and rep ort o n the j o b at one P . M . I ’ o ut might just as well knock half a day s pay . He glanced at Cappy Ricks and quote d

Co unt that day lo s t wh os e lo w des cending s un ” Finds rices s ho t to lo r and b us ines s o n f o r f un p g y d e .

Unable to maintain his composure in the face ” o f ile u f M r . i s h levity d ring O fice hours, Sk nner

r - withd ew, still wrapped in his sub Antarctic ’ . o dignity As the do r closed behind him, Mr . Peck s eyebrows went up in a manner indicative of ap prehension . “ ’ ff ” O a . I m to a bad st rt, Mr Ricks, he opined . ” n f o r You o ly asked a start, Cappy piped back “ ’ . t o u o o d at him I didn guarantee y a g start , and ’ ’ I wouldn t because I can t . I can only drive Skin — ner and Matt Peasley so far and no farther . ’ — — There s always a point at which I quit s r ah ” William . “ More familiarly known as Bill Peck , sir.

Very well, Cappy slid o ut to the edge of his chair and peered at Bill Peck balefully over 26 THE G O- GETTER

“ ’ to o f . o u the p his spectacles I ll have my eye on y , ” “ young feller, he shrilled I freely acknowledge our indebtedness to you, but the day you get the notion in your head that this Office is an o ld s o l ’ “ diers home He paused thoughtfully . I wo n ? ” “ ill o u . der what Skinner w pay y he mused Oh , w ” “ ell, he continued, whatever it is, take it and say nothing and when the moment is propitious—and provided you’ ve earned it— I ’ ll intercede with the ” . danged Old relic and get you a raise . “ Y o u . o u . Thank y very much, sir are most kind ” - Good day, sir .

' And Bill Peck picked up his hat and limped o ut s o f The Presence . Scarcely had the door clo ed

r e - behind him than Mr . Skinner entered Cappy ’ Ricks lair . He opened his mouth to speak, but

e Cappy silenc d him with an imperious finger . ’ “ f o u No t a peep o ut o y , Skinner, my dear boy, “ ’ he chirped amiably . I know exactly what you re

to b ut going to say and I admit your right say it, — — - h - h ! no w ah ahem ! Harumph , Skinner, listen to

Ho w to reason . the devil could you have the heart ? - o reject that c rippled ex soldier There he sto d,

o o n one sound leg, with his left sleeve tucked int his coat pocket and o n his homely face the g rin o f — a . o u t an unwhipped, unbeat ble man But y blas !Q— o in your cold, unfeeling soul , Skinner lo ked him THE G O- GETTER 27

the eye and turned him down like a drunkard turns ” - h w . o c o uld ? do n near beer Skinner, w you do it ’ U C a s ndaunted by p p y admonitory finger, Mr . u Skinner str ck a distinctly defiant attitude . “ ” e s Ther is no entiment in business, he replied “ angrily . A week ago last Thursday the local pos ts of the American Legion commenced their organized

drive f o r ' j o b s f o r their crippled and unemployed ’ comrades, and within three days you ve sawed o ff two hundred and nine such jobs on the various

corp orations that you control . B gang yo u shipped up to the mill in Washi has already applied f o r a charter f o r a new to be known N 5 3 n as Cappy Ricks Post o . d you had ex p erienced men discharged to room for these ” - ex soldiers . “ ” Y o u did bet I , Cappy triumphantly . “It’ s always Old Home Week logging camp ’ - l f o r . W. s and saw mil in the t I . W and ’ r evolutionary communi I m sick of their un

authorized strikes and tage, and by the Holy Pinkitoed 4 . 5 3 Prophet , Ca Ricks Post No . ,

L s o f - fir American egion, is rt o back e I can ” 9 o n think of to put the the run . “ Every office ta il yard could be “ ’ firs t- run by a se complained . I m retreat and bugle I tell 2 8

interests have absorbed all the s s ible and at the p resent moment

are overflowing with glory . What

no t . workers, talkers These ex spend to o much time fighting their b at

again . ’ Comrade Peck is the last o ne I ll ask yo u ” i ri kinner, Cappy prom sed cont K ’ ipling s Barrack Room Ballads,

” time to read, Mr . Skinner protested . this minute and buy a copy and ‘ ’ read one led Tommy, Cappy barked . “ ” Fo r . the good soul, he added “ Well, Comr make a hit with

. fo r ob me, Mr . Ricks He applied to me a j and I gave him his answer. Then he went to Captain t Matt and was refused, so, just o demonstrate his

o ur bad taste , he went over heads and induced you b ’ to pitchfork him into a j o . He ll curse the day he ” was inspired to do that . “ Skinner ! Skinner ! Look me in the eye ! Do ” yo u knowwhy I asked you to ta ke o n Bill Peck ? “ ’ - I do . Because you re to o tender hearted f o r ” your o wn good . “ You unimaginative dunderhead ! You i ber ing jackdaw ! How could I reject a boy wh o sim ’ ? ri ply would not be rejected Why, I ll bet a pe

30 THE G O- GETTER

“ l r u . Fo sho der There, there, Skinner, my boy . ’ — — — ive me if I ve been a trifl e ah ahem r ec i i g — p p —e r u - h - h ! k ut tate and har mph S inner, if you p o n a prohibitive price that skunk fir, by the Holy ’ - ! a Pink toed Prophet, I ll fire you Be f ir, boy, be

f di t . air. No r y work, Skinner Remember, Com r ade Peck has half of his left forearm buried in ” France . - al T twelve thirty , as Cappy was hurrying up C i fo rnia Street to luncheon at the Commercial

e . Club, he met Bill P ck limping down the sidewalk

- The ex soldier stopped him and handed him a card . “ ? ” o u o f b e . What do y think that, sir queried Isn’t it a neat business card ?” Cappy read

Cappy Ricks ran a sp eculative thumb over ’ Comrade Peck s business card . It was engraved . And copper plates or steel dies are not made in half an hour ! “ ’ By the Twelve Ragged Apo stles ! This was ’ C ap py s most terrible oath and he never employed hi “ it unless rocked to s very foundations . Bill, as to — o u one bandit another come clean . When did y ” first make up your mind to g o to work for us ? 31 32 THE G O- GETTER

“ ”

a o . A week g , Comrade Peck replied blandly “ And Wwas K s ll hat your grade when ai er Bi

L . went A . W . O . “ ” I was a buck . “ ’ ’ ff I don t believe you . Didn t anybody ever O er ” yo u something better ? “F requently . However, if I had accepted I ul ob b ad wo d have had to resign the nicest j I ever . ‘ ’ There wasn t much money in it, but it was filled with excitement and interesting experiments . I used to disguise myself as a Christmas tree or a

ff - box car and pick O German sharp shooters . I was ’ n t known as Peck s Bad Boy . I was Ofte temp ed to ’ o n o f quit, but whenever I d reflect the number A s merican lives I was saving daily, a commi sion f ” was just a scrap o paper to me . “If you’ d ever started in any other branch of the ’ ' ser vice you d have run John J . Pershing down to lance corporal . Bill, listen ! Have you ever had ” any experience selling skunk s pruce ?

Comrade Peck was plainly puzzled . He s hook ’ “ ” s ? h e a ske his head . What ort of stock is it d . “ n u ’ Humboldt County, Califor ia, spr ce, and it s coars e and s tringy and wet and heavy and smells ’ just like a skunk directly after using. I m afraid ’ — Skinner s going to s tar t you at th e bottom and ” skunk sp ruce is it . “ ” ri a s Can you d ve n ils in it, Mr. Rick ? THE G O- GETTER 33

“ Oh . , yes ” sir ? Does anybody ever buy skunk spruce, a o f ri Oh, Occ sionally one our b ght young men ’ digs up a half - wit who s willing to try anything o f wul no t once . Otherwise, course, we o d continue F . r to manufacture it ortunately, Bill, we have ve y ur little of it, but whenever o woods boss runs across ’ t a to di a good ree he h sn t the heart leave it stan ng, a and s a result, we always have enough skunk ” c o n e spru e hand to k ep our salesmen humble . “ ” s —at ri I can ell anything a p ce, Comrade Peck e n dl repli d unconcer e y, and continued o n his way to f e back the o fic . OR two months Cappy Ricks s aw nothing o f Bill t e Peck . That en erprising veteran had be n sent h out into the Uta , Arizona, New Mexico and Texas territory th e moment he had familiarized himself di with the numerous details regar ng freight rates, weights and the mills he represented, all things which a salesman should be familiar with before h e h F L h e sta rts o ut o n t e road . rom Salt ake City wired in an order f o r two carloads o f larch rustic and in Ogden he managed to inveigle a retail yard i with which Mr . Skinner had been try ng to do busi

a o f ness for years, into s mpling a carload skunk spruce boards, random lengths and grades, at a dollar above the pric e given him by Skinner . In Arizona he worked up some new business in mining no timbers, but it was t until he got into the heart o f Texas that Comrade Peck really commenced to demonstrate his selling ability . Standard oil der ricks were h is specialty and he shot the orders in so fast that Mr . Skinner was forced to wire him for mercy and instruct him to devote his talent to the disposal of cedar shingles and siding, Douglas fir 34 THE GO- GETT ER 35

and redwood . Eventually he completed his circle via Lo s s and worked his way home, Angeles, pau ing ui however, in the San Joaq n Valley to sell two more carlo ads of skunk spruce . When this order was wired in, Mr. Skinner came to Cappy Ricks with the telegram . “ lum Well, I must admit Comrade Peck can sell ” i “ ber, he announced grudg ngly . He has secured five new accounts and here is an order fo r two ’ o f e more carloads skunk spruce . I ll have to rais ” his salary about the first Of the year . “ h e My dear Skinner, why the devil wait until t first of the year ? Your pe rnicious habit of defer ring the inevitable parting with money has cos t th e o f mo re th an Yo u us services one good man . know you have to raise Comrade Peck’ s salary s o r s o no t n ooner later, why do it ow and smile ’ like a dentifrice advertisement while you re doing it ? Comrade Peck will feel a whole lot better as ? l ’ a result, and who knows He may conc ude you re ” a m . ? hu an being, after all and learn to love you “ i ’ er s r . i h V y well, I ll g ve him t e s ame salary Andrews was getting before Peck took over his ” r territo y . “ u Skinner, yo make it impossible for me to re a ’ fr in from showing you who s boss around here . ’ ’ ” He s er r s h e ? bett than And ews, i n t “ ” h nk is sir I t i he , . 36 THE GO- GETTER

fo r o f al Well then, the love a square de , pay ' h im more and pay it to him from th e first day Y . o u he went to work Get out . make me nerv ous . h o w 1 r is By the way, s And ews getting along inh ” S hanghai j ob ? “ ’ He s helping the cable company pay its income tax. Cables about three times a week on matters he should decide for hims elf. Matt Peasley is dis gusted with him . “ ! ’ A Ah Well, I m not disappointed . nd I sup pose Matt will be in here before long to remind me that I was the b right b o y who picked Andrews

f o r th e ob . o u j Well, I did, but I call upon y to ’ n s remember, Skinner, whe I m a sailed, that ’ ” Andrews appointment was temporary. “ ” Yes, sir, it was . “ ’ h i Well, I suppose I ll have to cast about for s ‘ s uccessor and beat Matt out o f his cheap I told ’ o u y s o triumph . I think Comrade Peck has some o f the earmarks o f a good manager for o ur Shang ’ ” f . hai O fice, but I ll have to test him a little further “ k He looked up humorously at Mr. Skinner. S in ” “ ’ e e ner, my d ar boy, he continued, I m going to hav ” him deliver a blue vase .

’

e . Mr. Skinn r s cold features actually glowed “ o f r Well , tip the chief police and the proprieto of the store off this time and save yourself some ” n money, he war ed Cappy . He walked to the win

W . EEK from the succeeding Saturday, Mr c ffi Skinner did not ome down to the o ce, but a telephone message from his home informed the chief clerk that Mr. Skinner was at home and some

f . what indispos ed . The chie clerk was to advise Mr

Peck that he, Mr. Skinner, had contemplated hav ing a conference with the latter that day, but that l n his indisposition wou d prevent this . Mr. Ski ner hoped to be feeling much better to morrow, and since he was very desirous o f a conference with

Mr. Peck before the latter should depart o nhis next o n selling pilgrimage, Monday, would Mr. Peck l ’ be good enough to cal at Mr. Skinner s house n ’ ? at o e O clock Sunday afte rnoon Mr . Peck sent back word that he would be there at the appointed in ’ k time and was rewarded with Mr . Sk ner s than s, i via the ch ef clerk . ’ o ne da Promptly at o clock the following y, Bill ’ Peck reporte d at the general manager s house . He found Mr. Skinner in bed, reading the paper and

l . looking surp rl s m g y well . He trusted Mr Skinner did felt better than he looked . Mr . Skinner , and at 38 THE GO- GETTER 39

f once entered into a discussion o the new customers . other prospec ts he particularly desired Mr . Peck to approach, new business to be investigated, and t o f fur her details without end . And in the midst f this con erence Cappy Ricks telephoned . A portable telephone stood o n a commode beside ’ mm . so i edi Mr S kinner s bed, the latter answered ately . Comrade Peck watched Skinner listen at tentivel f o r t y fully two minu es, then heard him say “ ’ ’ . e r . s Mr Ricks, I m t rribly sor y I d love to do thi ’ n fo r o u erra d y , but really I m under the weather . ’ n In fact, I m in bed as I sp eak to you o w . But ’ ’ is Mr . Peck here with me and I m sure he ll be very ” happy to attend to the matter for you . “ ” By all means, Bill Peck hastened to ass ure “ the general manager . Who does Mr . Ricks want killed and where will he have the body delivered ? ” '” H h - ! - a hah Hah hah Mr . Skinner had a

ul b e sing arly annoying, mirthless laugh , as if he

s - o f l grudged him elf such an unheard indu gence . “ ” “ ’ . nf l Mr Peck says, he i ormed Cappy, that he l be delighted to attend to the matter f o r yo u. He wants to know whom yo u want killed and where

o u - ! y wish the body delivered . Hah hah Hah ! ” Peck, Mr . Ricks will speak to you . “ l - . o Bill Peck took the te ephone Good afterno n, ” Mr. Ricks . 40 THE G O- GETTER

‘ ld o . Hello, soldier What are you doing this afternoon ? ” “ — No th ing after I conclude my conference with th e Mr . Skinner . By way, he has just given me

os al fo r am a most handsome bo t in s ary, which I most appreciative . I feel , however, despite Mr . ’ Skinner s graciousness, that you have put in a kind f o r word me with him , and I want to thank 9) yo u “ N u N . t o t o t . o Tut, tut a peep of you, sir a peep . You get nothing for nothing from Skinner ’ In v1 e o f or me . However, w the fact that you re feeling kindly toward me this afternoon, I wish ’ ’ f r b o you d do a little errand o me . I can t send a y — and I hate to make a messenger o ut o f you er ahm ah em ! - h - h That is, harumph ” I have no fals e pride, Mr . Ricks . “ Thank you, Bill . Glad you feel that way about it . Bill, I was prowling around town this fore o n noon, after church , and down in a store Sutter e Street, betwe n Stockton and Powell Street, o u o n the . right hand side as y face Market

Street, I saw a blue vase in a window . I have a ’ n m f . o weakness o r vases, Bill I m a sharp the , ’ n r to o . Now, this vase I saw is t ve y expensive as —in ’ c ollec vases g o fact, I wouldn t buy it for my — tion but one o f the finest and sweetest ladies o f my acquaintance has the mate to that blue vase ‘ T HE G O- GETTER 41

I saw in the window and I know she ’ d be prouder , — than Punch if she had two of them o ne f o r each o f ? side her drawing room mantel, understand “ ’ o N w, I m leaving from the Southern Pacific ’ to - fo r depot at eight o clock night, bound Santa

’ Barb ara to attend h er wedding anniversary to - mor

r o w . e night I forg t what anniversary it is, Bill, but I have been informed by my daughter that I ’ll be very much do tr o p if I send her any prese n t other than something in porcelain o r China or Clo is o na ell s , Bill , thi crazy little blue vase ” ~ U ? just fills the order . nderstand “ Y o u Yes, sir . feel that it would be most grace ful on your part if you could bring this little blue u Y u vase down to Santa Barbara with yo to night . o o have to have it t night, because if you wait until the store opens o nMonday the vas e will reach your hostess twenty - four hours after her anniversary

“ N ’ . o w Exactly, Bill , I ve simply got to have that ’ vas e . If I h ad discovered it yesterday I wouldn t ” u f o r l o o . be asking y to get it me t day, Bi l “ Please do no t make any explanations o r apol

. Y ogies, Mr Ricks . o u have described the vase ’ h o no you haven t . What sort of blue is it, w tall is it and what is, approximately, its greatest di ameter ? o o n s ? D es it set a ba e, or does it not Is ” o r ? it a solid blue , is it figured 42 THE G O- GETTER

“ ’ Clo is o nne s - r o f ld It s a va e, Bill so t o Dutch

s O - blue, or Delft, with ome riental funny busines s ’ s on it . I couldn t de cribe it exactly, but it has some ’ birds and flowers o n it . It s abo ut a foot tall and four inches in diameter and se ts o n a tea k - wood ” bas e . “ Y ” o u . Very well , sir. shall have it “ ’ e a And you ll deliv r it to me in s t teroom A, 7 m car , aboard the tra at Third and Townsend ” e fift - five o ? Streets, at s ven y t night

Bill . The expense will be trifling.

cashier in the morning, and tell ” my account . And Cappy hung

r took up the thread of the

and it was no t - until three ft his hous e and proceeded ’ Rick s blue vase . k in Sutter Street b e t Powell Stree s, and although up one side of the street and a single vase o f any des c rip

any shop window, nor could he find where such a vase as Cappy had

f o r s . t, perchance, be displayed ale THE G O- GETTE R 43

” “ o r o f the target, Bill Peck concluded, else I mis ’ understoo d him . I ll telephone his house and ask him to rep eat them .

He did, but nobody was at home except a Swed ish maid, and all she knew was that Mr . Ricks was o ut and the hour o f his return was unknown . So n s Mr . Peck we t back to Sutter Street and coured once more every shop window in the block . Then he scouted two blocks above Powell and two blocks

e in below Stockton . Still the blue vase r mained visible! So he transferred his s earch to a corr esponding

o n t area Bush Street, and when that failed, he wen

c f painstakingly over four blo ks o Post Street . He was s till without results when he moved o ne block further west and one further south and discovered

- Wl ndOWo f the blue vase in a huge plate glass a

o n shop Geary Street near Grant Avenue . He sur v eyed it CIitic ally and was convinced that it was the object he sought .

o He tried the door, but it was l cked, as he had ul anticipated it wo d be . So he kicked the do or and raised an infernal racket, hoping against hope that the noise might bring a watchman from the e r ar of the building . In vain . He backed out to the edge of the sidewalk and read the sign over the door 44 THE G O- GETTER

’ B . Cohen s Art Shop

This was a start, so Mr. Peck limped over to the

Palace Hotel and procured a telephone directory . n By actual count there were nineteen B . Cohe s c o mmenc scattered throughout the city, so before ing to call the nineteen, Bill Peck borrowed the city directory from the hote l clerk and scanned f o r th e ul ar it partic ar B . Cohen who owned the t

i . . shop . His search availed him noth ng B Cohen was listed as an art dealer at the address where the blue vase repose d in the show window . That was all . “ ’ m ” I suppose he s a co muter, Mr . Peck con

d and r c eeded di c e clu ed, at once p p to procure r f O tories o the adjacent cities of Berkeley, akland no t and Alameda . They were available, so in de a spair he ch nged a dollar into five cent pieces, s ought a telephone booth and commenced calling F up all the B . Cohens in San rancisco . Of the ni no t neteen, four did answer, three were tempo r aril y disconnected, six replied in Yiddish , five were

h ~ B o ne t . not e Cohen he sought, and swore he was Irish and that his name was spelled Cohan and pronounced with an accent on both syllables . a The B . Cohens resident in Berkeley, O kland, Al s ameda , San Rafael , Sau alito, Mill Valley, San

Mateo, Redwood City and Palo Alto were next tele

46 THE GO- GETTER

s e e to into nickels, dimes and quarter , r turn d the h o t - d , ill smelling telephone bo oth and proceede to r o f lay down a ba rage telephone calls to the B . Cohns o f all towns of any importance contiguous F to San rancisc o Bay . And he was lucky . On the s ixth call he located the particular B . Cohn in San nl ’ b e . o Rafael , o y to e inform d by Mr Cohn s co k that n d1 n1 . Mr . Cohn was g at the home of a Mr Simons in Mill Valley .

There were three Mr . Simons in Mill Valley, and Peck called them all before connecting with th e

i . e . r ght one Yes, Mr . B . Cohn was th re Who ? ? L t Oh . ! o . wished to speak him Mr Heck , Mr ake “ ’ — M r n A silence . Then . Cohn says he doesn t k ow L o f any Mr . ake and wants to know the nature ’ your business . He is dining and doesn t like to be disturbed unless the matter is o f grave im ” portance . “ Tell him Mr . Peck wishes to speak to him on ” e e l a matter of very gr at importanc , wai ed the ex private . “M ? ? ” r . . Metz Mr Ben Metz ” — - - - e c k. No, no, no . Peck p ? ” D - e - c - k ” No, P . “ C ? ” “P ” . ” “ E — a ? Oh . , yes, E . wh t THE G O- GETTE R 47

“C K H ” es . . Oh , y , Mr Eckstein ‘ “ ’ ’ Call Cohn to the phone o r I ll g o o ver th er e ” o n o u di the next boat and kill you, y damned i ot, “ n ” o . shrieked Peck . Tell him his store is fire That message was evidently delivered fo r almost

f ri instantly Mr . B . Cohn was pu fing and splutte ng ’ into the phone . “ ” Iss dot der fire marshal ? he managed to ar tic u late . “

r . o s n n L M . o t o isten, Cohn Y ur tore is fire , but. I had to say so in order to get you to the tele m . a . t o u. phone I Mr Peck, a total stranger yo You have a blue vase in your shop window o nGeary

’ r e i F S t e t n San rancisco . I want to buy it and

- fi e o I want to buy it before seven forty v t night . I want you to come across the bay and open the ” store and sell me that vase . “ ” Such a business ! Vo t yo u think I am ? Crazy ? n t ’ o . No, Mr . Cohn, I do I m the only crazy ’ ’ f r man talking . I m crazy o that vase and I ve g o t to have it right away . “ ” ’ Y o u v o t do t ? know vase costs Mr . B . Cohn s voice dripped syrup . “ ’ No, and I don t give a hoot what it costs . I ? ” want what I want when I want it . Do I get it “ ” Ve - s ee ? n e ell , lemme . Vot time iss it A sile c “ . n while B Cohn evide tly looked at his watch . It 48 THE G O- GETTER

iss now a quarter of seven, Mr . Eckstein, und der nexd drain from Mill Valley don’ t leaf until eight ’ Do t o cloc k . vill get me to San Francisco at — eight - fifty und I am dining mit friends und haf just finished my soup . “ ” To hell with your soup . I want that blue vase . “ E i f . I o u o t to Vell , I tell you, Mr ckste n, y g have m s t it call up y head salesman , Herman Jo o in der , — — , — Chilton Ap ar dm ents Prospect three two four — nine, und tell him I said he should come down

a ick o right vay q v und sell y u dot blue vase . Good ” bye, Mr . Eckstein .

And B . Cohn hung up . Instantly Peck called Prospect 3249 and asked ’ f r O Herman Joost . Mr . Joost s mother answered . She was desolated because Herman was no t at n m home, but vouchsafed the i for ation that he was b ? dining at the country clu . Which country club

She did not know . So Peck procured from the hotel clerk a list o f the country clubs in and around

' F e u San rancisco and sta rt d calling them p . At ’ eight o clock he was still being informed that Mr . L ’ Juice was not a member, that Mr . uce wasn t in, that Mr . Coos had been dead three months and that

Mr . Boos had played but eight holes when he re c eived a telegram calling him back to New York .

At the other clubs Mr . Joust was unknown . “L ” “ icked, murmured Bill Peck, but never let it THE G O- GETTER 49

’ ’ be said that I didn t go down fighting . I m going to heave a brick through that show window, grab ” the vase and run with it . He eng aged a taxicab and instructed the driver to wait f o r him at the corner o f Geary and Stock l h b to n r . e St eets A so, orrowed from the chauffeur r a ball peen hammer . When he eached the art shop f n o . B Coh , however, a policeman was standing in o f the doorway, violating the general orders a p o l m n n ic e a o duty by surreptitiously smoking a cigar . “ ’ ” He ll nab me if I crack that window, the des e o n perat Peck decided, and continued down the street, crossed to the other side and came back . ’ no It was w dark and over the art shop B . Cohn s name burned in small red, white and blue electric lights . 1 ' And 0 , it was spelled B . Cohen

- Ex Private William E . Peck sat down on a fire hydrant and cursed with rage . His weak leg hurt to o f o r him , , and some damnable reason, the stump o f his left arm developed the feeling that his mis s ing hand was itchy . “ ” l i i The world is fi led with id ots, he raved fur l “ ’ ’ o us . y I m tired and I m hungry . I skipped luncheon and I’ ve been too busy to think of din ” ner. He walked back to his taxicab and returned to the hotel where, hope springing eternal in his 5 0 THE G O- GETTER

3249 breast, he called Prospect again and discov ered that the missing Herman Joost had returned to the bosom o f his family . To him the frantic o f Peck delivered the message B . Cohn, whereupon the cautious Herman Joost replied that he would confirm the authenticity o f the message by tele ’ phoning to Mr . Cohn at Mr . Simon s home in Mill

. o r . Valley . If Mr B . Cohn Cohen confirmed Mr K ’ ek s story he , the said Herman Joost, would be ’ s o at the store ometime before nine o cl ck, and if

Kek to . Mr . cared , he might await him there

Kek f r Mr . said he would be delighted to wait o him there .

At nine - fifteen Herman Joos t appeared on the On th e a scene . his way down street he had t ken the precaution to pick up a policeman and bring o n him along with him . The lights were switched in the store and Mr . Joost lovingly abstracted the blue vase from the window . “ ’ ” What s the curs ed thing worth ? Peck de n m a ded . “ ” Two thousand dollars, Mr . Joost replied with f “ ” o . out so much as the quiver an eyelash Cash , r he added, apparently as an afte thought . The exhausted Peck leaned against th e sturd y guardian o f the law and sighed . This was the his s final straw . He had about ten dollars in p o session . THE G O- GETTER 5 1

“ ? ” s Y o u refu e, absolutely, to accept my check he quavered . “ ’ ” I don t know you, Mr . Peck, Herman Joost re plied simply . “Where ’ s your telephone ? ”

to la t Mr . Joost led Peck the telephone and the ter called up Mr . Skinner . “ ” “ Mr . Skinner, he announced, this is all that is ’ o t e morta l o f Bill Peck speaking . I ve g the stor — — Open and f o r two thousand dollars cash I can ” buy the blue vase Mr . Ricks has set his heart upon . “ ” ‘ Oh . ed , Peck, dear fellow, Mr Skinner purr “ a ll sympathetically . Have you been this time ” o nthat errand ? “ ’ n b I have . And I m going to stick o the j o until ’ F r I deliver the goods . o God s sake let me have two thousa nd dollars and bring it down to me at ’ B . Cohen s Art Shop o n Geary Street near Grant ’ Avenue . I m to o utterly exhausted to go up after ” it .

“ ’ My dear Mr . Peck, I haven t two thousand dol

to o o f lars in my house . That is great a sum money to o n keep hand . “ - U f Well , then, come down town, Open p the o fice ” s f afe and get the money o r me . “

f . a . Time lock on the o fice s fe, Peck Impossible “ - Well then, come down town and identify me at 5 2 THE G O- GETTER hotels and c afes and restaurants so I can cash my ” own check . 1 “ ” o o Mr ? Is your check g d, . Peck The flood o f invective which had been ac c umulat ’ ing in Mr . Peck s system all the afternoon no w broke its bounds . He screamed at Mr . Skinner a blasphemous invita tion to betake himself to the lower regions . “ ” - To morrow morning, he promised hoarsely , “ ’ I ll beat yo u to death with the stump of my left

- a s arm , you miserable, cold blooded, l zy, shiftle s ” slacker . ’ He called up Cappy Ricks residence next , and w asked for Captain Matt Peasley, who, he kne ,

- in- made his home with his father law . Matt Peasley came to th e telephone and listened sympathetically ’ f to Peck s tale o wo e . “ ’ Peck, that s the worst outrage I ever heard of, “ o f o u he declared . The idea setting y such a task . ” You take my advice and forget the blue vase . “ ’ ” “ I can t, Peck panted . Mr . Ricks will feel r to mighty chag ined if I fail get the vase to him . ’ ’ I wouldn t disappoint him for my right arm . He s ” been a dead game sport with me, Captain Peasley . “ ’ to o . But it s late to get the vase to him, Peck ’ He left the city at eight o clock and it is now al most half past nine “ u e o f I know, but if I can sec re legal poss ssion

5 4 THE G O- GETTER

“ m anded u suddenly, do yo know a good diamond when you see it ? ” “ ” d o I , Herman Joost replied . Will yo u wait here until I go to my hotel and ” get o ne ? “ ” Sure . F Bill Peck limped painfully away . orty min utes later he returned with a platinum ring set with diamonds and sapphires . “ t ? ” What are they wor h he demanded . Herman Joost looked th e ring over lovingly and appraised it conser vatively at twenty - five hundred dollars . “ Take it as security f o r the payment o f my ” “ check, Peck pleaded . Give me a receipt for it and after my check has gone through clearing I ’ ll ” come back and get the ring . F ifteen minutes later, with the blue vase packed in excelsior and reposing in a stout cardboard box, Bill Peck entered a r estaurant and ordered din When he had dined he engaged a taxi and was F driven to th e flying field at the Marina . rom the night watchman he ascertained the address o f his i pilot friend and at midnight, with his fr end at the t wheel, Bill Peck and his blue vase soared up in o the moonlight and headed south . An hour and a half later they landed in a stubble d field in the Salinas Valley and, bidding his frien THE G O- GETTER 5 5

- to good bye, Bill Peck trudged across the railroad a track and sa t down . When the train be ring Cappy t Ricks came roaring down the valley, Peck twis ed a Sunday paper with which he had provided him

d . self, into an improvised torch , which he lighte Standing betwee n the rails he swung the flaming paper frantically .

The train slid to a halt, a brakeman opened a o vestibule do r, and Bill Peck stepped wearily aboard . “What do you mean by flagging this train ?” the ri e th brakeman demanded ang ly, as he signal d e “ ” i G o eng neer to pro ceed . t a ticket ? “ ’ 0 o t N , but I ve g the money to pay my way . And I flagged this train because I wanted to change ’ o f in my method travel . I m looking for a man o f 7 stateroom A car , and if you try to block me ’ ” there ll be murder done . “ ’ - r That s right . Take advantage of your half p o ” tion arm and abuse me, the brakeman retorted “ ld m an bitterly . Are you looking for that little o with the Henry Clay collar and the white mutton chop whiskers ? ” “ I certainly am . “ u t Well , he was looking for yo just before we lef F e o ne San rancisco . He asked me if I had s en a I ’ll armed man with a box under his good arm . u lead yo to him . 5 6 T HE G O- GETTER

’ A prolonged ringing at C ap p y s stateroo m door brought the o ld gentleman to the entrance in his nightshirt . “ Very sorry to have to disturb you, Mr . Ricks, “ said Bill Peck, but the fact is there were so many s C oh ans Cohens and Cohn and , and it was such ob two I a j to dig up thousand dollars, that failed

- five to connect with you at seven forty last night, as per orders . It was abso lutely impossible for me to accomplish the task within the time limit o u l set, but I was resolved that y shou d not be dis ’ appointed . Here is the vase . The shop wasn t within four blocks of where you thought it was, ’ r . sir, but I m sure I found the ight vase It ought to to be . It cost enough and was hard enough get, so it should be precious enough to form a gift fo r f ” any friend o yours . Cappy Ricks stared at Bill Peck as if the latter were a wraith . ” “By the Twelve Ragged Apostles ! h e mur “ - ! mured . By the Holy Pink toed Prophet We changed the sign o nyo u and we stacked the Cohens o n you and we set a policeman to guard the shop o u i w to keep y from break ng the windo , and we made yo u dig up two thousand dollars on Sunday u night in a town where yo are practically unknown, ’ and while yo u missed the train at eight o clock, ’ yo u overta ke it at two o clock in the morning and T HE GO- GETTER

u deliver the blue vase . Come in and rest yo r poor ’ l . o d game leg, Bill Brakeman, I m much obliged ” o u to y .

’ Bill Peck entered and slumped wearily down o u “ ? ” b the settee . So it was a plant e cracked, and “ ’ his voice trembled with rage Well , sir, you re ’ o ld e an man and you v been good to me, so I do

u . not begrudge yo your little joke, but Mr Ricks,

’ ‘ I c ant stand things like I used to . My leg hurts and my stump hurts and my heart hurts o f He paused, choking, and the tears impotent “ “Y u ul ’ rage filled his eyes . o sho dn t treat me that ” “ ’ way, sir, he complained presently . I ve been trained not to question orders, even when they ’ seemutterly foolish to me ! I ve been trained to —o n if b ut l obey them time, possible, if impossib e, I ’ l to obey them anyhow . ve been taught loya ty ’ to my chief- and I m sorry my chief found it nec es ff o f ’ sary to make a bu oon me . I haven t had a — very go od time the past three years and and — you can p a - p a - pass your skunk spruce and larch rustic and short odd length stoc k to some slacker — ’ — — like Skinner and you d better arrange to r e — k ’ — place S inner, because he s young enough to take a beating—and I’ m going to—give it to him ’ — — and it ll be a hospital j o b sir Cappy Ricks ruffled Bill Peck’ s aching head with a paternal hand . 5 8 THE G O- GETTER

“ o ld b o was — Bill , y, it cruel damnably cruel , but I had a big job for you and I had to find out a lot of things about you before I entrusted yo u with ob i ou that j . So I arranged to g ve y the Deg ree o f f the Blue Vase, which is the supreme test o a

- u a g o getter. You tho ght you carried into this st te s ur r oom a two thou and dollar vase, but between o a selves, what you really carried in was ten thou ” s and dollar j ob as our S hanghai manager. “Wha—what “ Every time I have to pick out a permanent

f o b o s o r holder o a j worth ten th u and dollars, more, f ” I give the candidate the Degree o the Blue Vase, “ ’ o f Cappy explained . I ve had two men out a field ” of fifteen deliver the vase, Bill .

Bill Peck had forgotten his rage, but the tears

’ of his recent fury still glistened in his bold blue “ i — I ’ll o u . eyes . Thank y , sir I forg ve you and ” make good in Shanghai . “ ’ I know you will , Bill . Now, tell me, son, weren t yo u tempted to quit when yo u discovered the al most insuperable obstacles I ’ d placed in your way ?” “ b e was . u Yes, sir, I I wanted to commit s icide ’ fore I d finished telephoning all the C - o - h - e - n- s in

r o n C - o - h - n- s the world . And when I sta ted the

’ ’ it s sir . ul ui s well, this way, I just co dn t q t becau e THE GO- GETTER 5 9 that would have been disloyal to a man I once ” knew . “ Who was he Cappy demanded, and there was awe in his voice . “ ri He was my brigadier, and he had a b gade motto ! It shall be done . When the divisional com mander called him up and told him to move f o r ward with his brigade and occupy certain terri ‘ ! I r . t to y, our brigadier would say Very well, sir ’ f ri shall be done . If any o ficer in his b g ade showed signs o f fl unking his j ob be cause it appeared im b possi le, the brigadier would just look at him once

- and then that officer would remember the motto and g o and do his j o b o r die trying . “ ’ r es r it dc c or s In the a my, sir, the p p doe sn t bubble up from the bottom . It filters down from

An iz the to p . orjg ag ati n is what its commanding o m t u t u- ” m “ a w m “ s o flic er is — no r neither better worse . In my com . pany, when the top sergeant handed out a week o f u kitchen police to a buck, that buck was o t of luck

‘ ’ ‘ if ri ! Al l he couldn t muster a g n and say , right, s ’ ergeant . It shall be done . “ The brigadier sent for me once and ordered to o ut ’ me go and get a certain German sniper . I d — been pretty lucky some days I got enough f o r a — ’ mess and he d heard o f me . He opened a map ‘ ’ ! ~ and said to me Here s about where he holes up . ’ Go get him, Private Peck . Well, Mr . Ricks, I 60 THE GO- GETTER

- and snapped into it gave him a rifle salute, and ‘ ’— ’ said, Sir, it shall be done and I ll never forget the look that man gave me . He came down to the ’ field hospital to see me after I d walked into o ne ’ i 8 of those Austr an 8 s . I knew my left wing was a total loss and I suspected my left leg was about e d to leave me, and I was downheart d and wante

. s ! to die . He came and bucked me up He aid ‘ ’ ri o u Why, P vate Peck, y aren t half dead . In civil life you’ re going to be worth half a dozen live ones — ’ ’ aren t yo u ? But I was pretty far gone and I di ’ told him I dn t believe it , so he gave me a hard ‘ look and said ! Private Peck will do his utmost ’ to recover and as a starter he will smile . Of e o f cours , putting it in the form an order, I had ri ! to give him the usual reply, so I g nned and said ‘ ’ Sir, it shall be done . He was quite a man, sir, — and his brigade had a soul his soul “ e I see, Bill . And his soul go s marching on , ? ?” eh Who was he, Bill

Bill P eck named his idol . “ ” By the Twelve Ragged Apostles ! There was a ’ in awe in C ppy Ricks voice, there was reverence “ ” S o n his faded old eyes . , he continued gently

twenty - five years ago your brigadier was a candi — date fo r an important job in my employ and I ’ t gave him the Degree of the Blue Vase . He couldn

r a - get the vase legitimately, so he th ew cobble stone

62 THE G O- GETTER

r o f my mission and car ied my objective, which, s n if m cour e, I could not have do e I had per itted ” the German to get me . “ I see, Bill . Well, give that blue vase to the porter in the morning. I paid fifteen cents for it n t te . in a five, and fifteen . cent s ore Meanwhile, hop into that upper berth and help yourself to a ” - well earned rest . “But aren ’ t you going to a wedding anniversary ? ” a . at Sant Barbara , Mr Ricks “ di a no t. o I am Bill, I scovered a long time g ’ that it s a good idea f o r me to get out of town and h h play golf as Often as I can . Besides w ic , prudence dictates that I remain away f rom the o f fic e f o r a week after the seeker o f blue vases fails — to deliver the goods and by the way, Bill , what ? u . sort o f a game do yo play Oh, forgive me, Bill

I forgot about your left arm . “ ’ “ ” e Say, look here, sir, Bill Peck retort d, I m big

- enough and ugly enough to play o ne handed golf .

' “ ” o u ever tried ? But, have y it ” “ r ri b i—itf No, sir, Bill Peck eplied se ously, ut shall be done !”

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