Anishinaabeg Today Wednesday, September 4, 2019 16 Signs of Emotional Abuse in a Relationship Anishinaabeg Today
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AAnniisshhiinnaaaabbeegg TTooddaayy A Monthly Chronicle of White Earth Reservation Vol. 24 No. 9 White Earth, Minn. [email protected] Wednesday, September 4, 2019 Providing a helping hand Photo by Gary W. Padrta Members of the Church of Epiphany in Plymouth, Minn., recently replaced the roof of a house in White Earth village. The group was lead by Rev. Lisa White Smith who ministered on White Earth Reservation for many years. In addition to repairing homes, the group also held a Bible camp in Naytahwaush. Photos by Gary W. Padrta Top : Michael Fairbanks, third from left, was inaugurated as the new White Earth Tribal N E 4 Chairman on Aug. 16 at the Shooting Star Casino. Joining Fairbanks were District II D M D 1 G E s R e A T O A k D T R AYTAHWAUSH Representative Kathy Goodwin, left, District III Representative Umsy Tibbetts, and N I AYTAHWAUSH a D S O t N L N A i N O S P t i P m A E Winona LaDuke, executive director of Honor the Earth. Bottom : Fairbanks deliverers r o T r S e R t S P P e U ARVEST FESTIVAL his inaugural speech. D H September 6-8, 2019 Friday - Sept. 6 Warm Ups Inauguration 2019 r Saturday - Sept. 7 Michael Fairbanks sworn in as new Chairman e Walk - 8 a.m. m S o More than 650 people attended the Smokey Hill drum group sang the Grand S Flag Raising - 10 a.m. t s White Earth Inauguration ceremony wel - Entry Song while the White Earth Honor W Parade - 11 a.m. u R Grand Entry - 1 & 7 p.m. coming a new Chairmen on Aug. 16 at the Guard and Ogichidag Warrior Society C C l Feast 5 p.m. Shooting Star Casino Event Center brought in the flags and staffs as members E a t Michael Fairbanks defeated Brent of the RBC and royalty followed. Merlin s Sunday - Sept. 8 o Gish, 1,352 to 679, in a special general Deegan and Allen Hardy performed the P Grand Entry - 1 p.m. election on Aug. 6. The election was held pipe ceremony and invocation. Specials : to fill the unexpired four-year term of for - Fairbanks selected Rob Tibbetts to Men’s Woodland mer Chairman Terry Tibbetts who was administer the Oath Office, which was done Women’s Old Style Jingle Dress elected in 2016 and passed away in March in Ojibwe. Switch Dance after a lengthy illness. You can read Fairbanks’ speech on Page 28 Princess/Brave Contest Master of Ceremonies Winona LaDuke . The entire event can also be welcomed everyone to the event and the viewed on the White Earth Facebook page. 2 Anishinaabeg Today Wednesday, September 4, 2019 16 signs of emotional abuse in a relationship Anishinaabeg Today The Anishinaabeg Today (AT) is the offical publica - By Mallory Black (Diné) In a healthy relationship, each partner must commit to tion of White Earth Reservation and is published once a StrongHearts Native Helpline being honest, communicating, and trusting the other person. month. Editorials and articles appearing in the AT are Each partner must work to maintain healthy communication No one expects to find themselves in an abusive rela - the responsibility of the authors and do not necessarily and avoid hurting the other person emotionally, spiritually tionship. Most relationships begin in a good way with kind reflect the opinion or attitude of the AT staff or the White and physically. Above all, each partner must show respect in words and compliments, but they can turn harmful and emo - Earth Reservation Business Committee. the relationship, especially when disagreements arise. tionally abusive at any time. In an abusive relationship, any disagreement can esca - The AT reserves the right to reject any advertising Emotional abuse is a type of domestic violence that late into emotionally or physically abusive behavior. or materials submitted for publication. The submission often flies under the radar, but it should always be taken seri - Remember, there is never an excuse for abuse. of articles, and photos is encouraged, however, they are ously as a form of abuse. When emotional abuse is present in Getting Help subject to editing for grammar, length, and malicious/ a relationship, a partner will criticize, threaten or isolate their Recognizing the signs of emotional abuse is the first libelous content. The Editor makes the sole decision of partner as a way to manipulate and control them. Emotional step to getting help. If you or someone you know is being what is published in the AT and will not assume any abuse can be degrading, humiliating and terrifying, often hurt in your relationship, know that you are not alone. There responsibility for unsolicited material nor will the AT leaving long-lasting scars on one’s spirit and self-esteem. are people who want to support you, including advocates at guarantee publication upon submission. Deadlines are So, how do you know if you’re in an abusive relation - the StrongHearts Native Helpline. strictly enforced! Deadline dates are printed on Page 2 ship? What can you do when a loved one is being emotion - By calling 1-844-7NATIVE (762-8483), you can con - in each issue. ally abused? Let’s start with recognizing the tactics of emo - nect anonymously with a Native advocate who can offer a The AT is distributed at no charge to all postal tional abuse. listening ear and support with whatever is happening in your patrons living on White Earth Reservation, and by mail Signs of Emotional Abuse relationship. You can share as much as you feel comfortable, to White Earth Reservation members (who request the In an intimate relationship, emotional abuse can look and our advocates will listen without judgment or blame. newspaper - one per household) living within the United like when a partner: The StrongHearts Native Helpline is available daily States. The cost of a newspaper subscription is $12 per ● Constantly calls you hurtful or degrading names, from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. CST. Advocates also offer crisis inter - year for non-members (including descendants) living off insults you or criticizes you vention, assistance with finding ways to stay safe, and a con - the reservation. The AT can be read online for no cost ● Acts extremely jealous or possessive of you nection to Tribal and Native domestic violence resources, if at www.whiteearth.com. ● Humiliates you in any way, or shames you needed. We can also assist concerned friends or family mem - ● Isolates you from your family, friends or community bers with ways to help a loved one who is being abused, as For more information call 218-983-3285 Ext. ● Blocks you from making new friends or joining social well as people who are worried they might be abusing their 5903, email: [email protected], fax: 218-983- groups partner. 3641, or write to: ● Ignores your presence for several hours, days or weeks It can also be incredibly helpful to lean on family mem - Anishinaabeg Today ● Refuses to listen, speak or respond to you (ex. silent bers and your cultural roots for support. Never forget that PO Box 418 treatment) you have the strength and courage of your ancestors, too, White Earth, MN 56591 ● Explodes in anger toward you or is constantly angry at who dreamed of a world where every one of their relatives everything you do would live in safety, happiness and in harmony. You deserve Member of the v ● Pressures you to commit and becomes angry or sulks to feel safe in your relationship, no matter what. Native American Journalist Association v when you don’t commit Minnesota Newspaper Association Threatens to hurt you or themselves, or uses weapons ● Anishinaabeg Today WER Business Committee to scare you ● Threatens to hurt your children, family members or Subscribers pets Michael A. Fairbanks ● Threatens to take your children away from you or call ** Please let us know if you recently moved, or have Chairman child protective services (CPS) on you moved in the past few years so we can cancel your ● Repeatedly lies about where they are, what they’re old address. Papers are still going to old addresses. Leonard Alan Roy doing or who they’re with Call the Anishinaabeg Today at 218-983-3285 Secretary-Treasurer Calls you “crazy,” “too sensitive,” or denies abuse is ● Ext. 5903 or email [email protected] happening when confronted (ex. gaslighting) Raymond Auginaush Sr. Cheats on you or flirts with other people to intention - District I Representative ● ally hurt you Kathy Goodwin ● Accuses you of cheating in the relationship District II Representative When emotional abuse is present in a relationship, you may feel off-balance, like you’re walking on eggshells, or Eugene “Umsy” Tibbetts question your judgment more than usual. This is because an District III Representative abusive partner uses harmful behaviors like the tactics above Editor to manipulate and control their partner so they feel power - less. That’s why it is so important to trust your instincts when your partner does or says something that doesn’t feel right to Gary W. Padrta you. Emotional abuse is extremely dangerous and detrimen - Future Issues * tal to a person’s wellbeing and often has lifelong psycholog - ical effects. An abusive partner’s behavior is likely to esca - Deadline Issue Date late as time goes on, and they will often use emotional abuse in combination with other abuse types and tactics to obtain September 25 October 2 and maintain power in the relationship. People in abusive relationships tend to blame them - October 30 November 6 selves for the abuse or believe they must have done some - thing to deserve the criticism or attacks.