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The Reflexivity of Pain and Privilege: an Autoethnography of (Mestizo) Identity and Other Mestizo Voices

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The Reflexivity of Pain and Privilege: an Autoethnography of (Mestizo) Identity and Other Mestizo Voices University of Northern Iowa UNI ScholarWorks Dissertations and Theses @ UNI Student Work 2008 The reflexivity of pain and privilege: An autoethnography of (Mestizo) identity and other Mestizo voices Ellis Hurd University of Northern Iowa Let us know how access to this document benefits ouy Copyright ©2008 Ellis Hurd Follow this and additional works at: https://scholarworks.uni.edu/etd Part of the Bilingual, Multilingual, and Multicultural Education Commons Recommended Citation Hurd, Ellis, "The reflexivity of pain and privilege: An autoethnography of (Mestizo) identity and other Mestizo voices" (2008). Dissertations and Theses @ UNI. 739. https://scholarworks.uni.edu/etd/739 This Open Access Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Student Work at UNI ScholarWorks. It has been accepted for inclusion in Dissertations and Theses @ UNI by an authorized administrator of UNI ScholarWorks. For more information, please contact [email protected]. THE REFLEXIVITY OF PAIN AND PRIVILEGE: AN AUTOETHNOGRAPHY OF (MESTIZO) IDENTITY AND OTHER MESTIZO VOICES A Dissertation Submitted in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree Doctor of Education Approved: Dr. John K. Smith, Chair Dr. Kurt S. Meredith, Committee Member Dr. Lynn E. Nielsen, Committee Member Dr. Deborah L. Tidwell, Committee Member Dr. Tammy S. Gregersen, Committee Member Ellis Hurd University of Northern Iowa December 2008 UMI Number: 3343925 Copyright 2008 by Hurd, Ellis All rights reserved. INFORMATION TO USERS The quality of this reproduction is dependent upon the quality of the copy submitted. Broken or indistinct print, colored or poor quality illustrations and photographs, print bleed-through, substandard margins, and improper alignment can adversely affect reproduction. In the unlikely event that the author did not send a complete manuscript and there are missing pages, these will be noted. Also, if unauthorized copyright material had to be removed, a note will indicate the deletion. ® UMI UMI Microform 3343925 Copyright 2009 by ProQuest LLC. All rights reserved. This microform edition is protected against unauthorized copying under Title 17, United States Code. ProQuest LLC 789 E. Eisenhower Parkway PO Box 1346 Ann Arbor, Ml 48106-1346 Copyright by ELLIS HURD 2008 All Rights Reserved THE REFLEXIVITY OF PAIN AND PRIVILEGE: AN AUTOETHNOGRAPHY OF (MESTIZO) IDENTITY AND OTHER MESTIZO VOICES An Abstract of a Dissertation Submitted in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree Doctor of Education Approved: Dr. John K. Smith, Committee Chair Dr. Sue A. Joseph Dean of the Graduate College Ellis Hurd University of Northern Iowa December 2008 ABSTRACT Approximately 20 million Latinos living in the United States identify as Mestizos. A Mestizo is a person of mixed heritage. Almost half of these Mestizos racially or culturally identify as White, while the other half identify as Hispanic or racially mixed. These racial and cultural identifications have vast effects on educational performance: those identifying themselves as Hispanic or mixed experience lower academic achievement whereas those identifying as White do not. Many communities have experienced an influx of Mestizo-Latinos, but are ill prepared for the educational challenges due to the language and cultural differences Mestizos bring. This researcher himself has experienced the racial and cultural jerks between identity and society. It is through an autoethnographic journey that Latino and non-Latino voices are elucidated. Additional perspectives are gathered from the Marshalltown area to better situate the context of the research and complex yet integral culture of Mestizo-Latinos. Self- reflexive narratives, observational field-work, and intensive interviews are conducted to show those additional voices and perspectives. The interplay between the autoethno graphic journey and that of interviews and observations is the crux of the study, where observational and interviewing layers inform the researcher of his own affective identity history. A holistic poststructuralist perspective is used to show this research as highly unique, and interrelated characteristics allow for embedded interpretations. Although limited to the researcher and his participants, this research is rich enough to frame the issues for other communities having Mestizo-Latinos. ii DEDICATION "Soli Deo gloria " To Mandy Lee Hurd, for her patience, her faith, and her understanding To Luz Marina Peiia Polo Hurd, who never saw this but always knew I could To Franklin Thomas Hurd, Jr., who rose above adversity to help me become who I am To those called "Mestizo" or Mixed, who have gone before me and those who come after iii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Acknowledgements can be curious things. They give the impression of offering so much to so many with so few words and space. A truly good acknowledgement, it seems, should recognize all the efforts of those who had an impact—or at least influence—in the culmination of an end product, revealing that a process, method, or practice has been learned. To do this, some write lengthy accounts, recognizing countless people; others write more modestly. It is my attempt, then, to offer something different, not in the traditional fashion of how these acknowledgements may go. Thus, I begin at the end. I would like to acknowledge the interviewing committee and Department of Curriculum and Instruction Chair, Dr. Phyllis Metcalf-Turner, at Illinois State University, for appointing me as an assistant professor while knowing at the time I did not have this dissertation complete. It is my hope that their risk and faith in me will prove very valuable. I would like to thank Janet Witt, whose feedback and "enlightened eye" assisted me in more ways than she may ever know. This dissertation would not appear as it does today if it was not for her guidance. I am deeply grateful for my dissertation committee: Dr. John K. Smith, Dr. Kurt S. Meredith, Dr. Lynn E. Nielsen, Dr. Deborah L. Tidwell, and Dr. Tammy S. Gregersen. Each member provided countless hours and assistance in the construction of this project. I am especially thankful to Dr. John K. Smith, who chaired the committee and served as a compass for the qualitative aspects. I am equally indebted to him for his early recognition and comments of me as a potential scholar in higher education. iv I am also deeply indebted to Dr. Kurt S. Meredith, for serving as my academic advisor, and for his enduring efforts towards me as a writer, and to Dr. Lynn E. Nielsen, for his encouraging and gentle yet powerful approach to the academe. These lessons I take with me forever. I am very grateful for all my participants, especially "La Familia." Their extreme generosity and sacrifice in allowing me conduct research was vital to this study and to the understanding of how my own identity was formed all these years. jMuchisimas Gracias! I am truly thankful for the teaching and leadership of all my professors at the University of Northern Iowa. Each course of study improved my own practice and gave me something I was able to use, both in this dissertation and as a new professor. I am deeply beholden to my wife, who—unfettered by the daunting tasks of becoming a doctor, stepped onto this long yet valuable journey with me. Her unselfish work of watching our children at night while I attended courses hours away did not go unnoticed. Her many hours listening and learning along side me as a fellow educator, while also keeping me epistemologically grounded, made it possible for me to continue and eventually finish this degree. I cannot thank her enough. I am deeply gratefully for the reviewers of my doctoral application in the Graduate College at the University of Northern Iowa. Their acceptance of me into the program with full standing was the apex of my journey. For without their approval, I would not have begun my studies, and thus would not have finished this product. My hope is that they and others may continue to open doors for the marginalized. V TABLE OF CONTENTS PAGE CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION AND STATEMENT OF PROBLEM 1 Epigram 1 Purpose of the Study ............ .3 Autoethnography 6 CHAPTER 2: REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE 8 Epigram 8 A Mestizo-Latino Description 9 The Spanish Conquest 9 The Minor Caste System and Mestizo Variations 10 Mestizo as Socio-cultural Designations 11 Immigrant Minorities 12 Involuntary Minorities 13 Mestizo (non) Acceptance in "Anishinabe-waki" (The Americas) 13 Mestizos and Schooling 16 Social Class and Schooling 17 Identity and Schooling 18 The Uncivilized and Inferior 20 The Marginality of Mestizo-Latinos 23 CHAPTER 3: METHODOLOGY 25 Epigram 25 vi Research Design 25 Data Collection and Phase Procedures 27 Personal Narratives 28 Observations 29 Mestizo-Latino Interviews 30 Educator Interviews 32 Resident Interviews 32 Reflexivity 34 CHAPTER 4: ANALYSIS AND INTERPRETATION 36 Introduction 36 The Milieus 38 Marshalltown 38 La Familia (The Family) 40 Ethnographical Sketches 46 Luis 46 Isabella 58 Nick 70 Andre 78 Pain and Privilege: The Interpretation of Four Mestizo Identities 86 Pain 86 Privilege .91 Luis 94 vii Isabella 100 Nick 105 Andre 107 La Familia (The Family) 110 CHAPTER 5: AUTOETHNOGRAPHY., 113 Epigram 113 Introduction 115 Context 118 The Perfect Family 118 The Three Trials 120 The Best Kept Family Secret 121 The Incoming 124 The "Fatal Flaw" 125 Episodes 129 Episode 1 - 1976 129 Episode 2-1981 129 Episode 3-1982 to 1984 134 Episode 4-1984 to 1987 141 Episode 5-1987 to 1988 144 Episode 6-1988 146 Episode 7-1988 to 1989 149 Episode 8-1990 to 1995 153 Reflexivity 158 Identity and Self. 159 Self as a Social Structure 161 Pain 161 Privilege 169 Mestizo Retrospection 173 CHAPTER 6: CONCLUSIONS AND FUTURE IMPLICATIONS 176 Epigram 176 Introduction 176 Summary 178 Pain and Privilege 179 Luis 180 Isabella 181 Nick 181 Andre 182 La Familia (The Family) •. 183 Pain 184 Privilege 185 Reflexivity 186 Research Questions Revisited 187 Implications 192 Educators 193 ix Students 198 Mestizos 202 Reflexivity Revisited 205 REFERENCES 208 APPENDIX: THE MINOR CASTE SYSTEM AND MESTIZO VARIATIONS 219 1 CHAPTER 1 INTRODUCTION AND STATEMENT OF PROBLEM Epigram It was 1988 in the Northwest suburbs of Chicago.
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