Time Machine Telex Take on Eurovision Song Contest
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XXXTHE FRONT BACK WHEN THINGS, T WEREN HOW THEY ARE NOW TIME MACHINE TELEX TAKE ON EUROVISION SONG CONTEST We backpedal to 19 April 1980 when leftfield Belgian electronic outfit TELEX took the stage at the Eurovision Song Contest in a bid to bag the legendary musical prize… or failing that, come last with null points Words: JOOLS STONE Electronically speaking, when you think There’s a laconic humour at work in I told him he was going to win. He said, of Belgium what springs to mind? Plastic much of Telex’s music, which with its ‘Well, if I win it’s good for me, but if Bertrand of novelty punk hit fame ‘Ca vocodered Euro vocals, analogue synths you win, it’s good for music!’.” Plane Pour Moi’? The devastating Front and metronome rhythms, inevitably 242? The late 80s/early 90s hardcore recalls Kraftwerk spliced with a touch Michel’s bandmate, the late Marc techno scene? R&S Records? The ever- of Devo perhaps. For evidence, seek Moulin, was quoted as saying that Telex inventive Soulwax? To the list we should out their painfully slowed down wanted to come last, but were pipped add spiky, conceptual electropoppers version of ‘Rock Around The Clock’ to the post by Portugal, was that true? Telex, whose finest moment found the and, for a moment of inspired national trio of Michel Moers, Dan Lacksman and self-reference, their cover of the “Not quite, but we thought the only Marc Moulin gracing the stage of the aforementioned ‘Ca Plane Pour Moi.’ The meaningful result was to come first… or 1980 Eurovision Song Contest with their rather snarky ‘Euro-Vision’ is certainly of last,” says Michel. “Our record company celebratory ditty ‘Euro-Vision’. its time, with its references to the Berlin actually thought we could win. There Wall and the exchange rate of Italian Lira, were some interesting bets being made The video of the performance, which but what was it all about? in the UK. So before really getting took place at the Congresgebouw in The Hague, Netherlands, is something to inside the circus we started to believe “The song was a kind of ‘international that winning was a possibility. It was behold with the band donning tuxedos situationism’ I suppose,” explains Michel. and twirling their white evening scarves the 25th anniversary of the contest too, “Putting a little worm in an apple. It was change was in the air and it was the around for comic effect. There’s even a about this glittering contest taking place lacklustre confetti shower. But how did first time that the public could vote. in old Europe, opening borders virtually, But in fact the opposite happened. I the creators of tracks such as ‘Moscow if only for a few hours. Musically, we Discow’ and ‘Temporary Chicken’, both think the audience and the judges used a few Eurovision cliches, joyful insanely bonkers and irresistibly catchy, understood the song quite well and harmonies, getting higher tonally towards come to be front and centre at Europe’s were upset by it, though some people the end, a bit of a Beethoven theme…” kitschest talent show? kindly said that we were just too far While it might have been some 35 years ahead of our time.” ago, what does Michel remember about “Our record company, RKM, came up with the night of the contest itself? the idea following the great international Telex had been around for a few years response to our first album ‘Looking For before Eurovision and they’d already THE VIDEO: WATCH “The evening was a bit of a nightmare,” St Tropez’,” deadpans Telex frontman had some success with ‘Moscow he offers. “We had no real rehearsals, Michel Moers. “At first, we thought it was but there were lots of fraught discussions Discow’. Did appearing on Eurovision a stupid idea. Not our type of music, nor affect their career at the time? our audience and we didn’t really want to about hiring backing singers to replace the vocoder, unexpected rules about my show ourselves on TV, thinking that the “It had a very bad impact,” exclaims music was more important.” flash camera possibly damaging the TV cameras and our machines having to be Michel. “Our fans wondered what we were doing there and we were too Like the Residents and Daft Punk, Telex switched off because of fire safety. And strange to reach a new audience… rarely appeared performing unmasked, during the performance itself I couldn’t except in Portugal, don’t ask me why.” https://youtu.be/Y_mTNpyvRwc but eventually they relented. “We thought hear my vocals or the backing vocals, so it would be interesting to go,” says Michel. consequently my singing was not at its Telex ended the night 17th out of 19 “After all, we were making ‘pop music’ best.” entrants with just 14 points, 10 of and Eurovision was the epitome of that, plus subverting cliches was something And how did their performance and the which – full marks – came from the we enjoyed.” song itself go down? Portuguese jury. Despite their relatively high profile at “The audience looked as if they were “The main thing was having fun and home, they still had to compete with wondering ‘What the hell are these guys being satisfied with the result, for a few nine other bands to bag the slot with a doing here?’,” says Michel. “We were days anyway,” concludes Michel. “The qualifying show on Belgian TV. wondering the same thing actually. Polite funny thing is that our appearance is applause came after a few seconds of still remembered and shown every time “If I remember correctly, it was jointly stunned silence. My favourite memory there is a programme about the contest, voted for by a professional jury and the was speaking to the eventual winner and now you’re asking me about it too, public, 50/50,” adds Michel. Johnny Logan backstage before the show. so in a way maybe we won.”.