March 2009

Serving the communities along the Biscayne Corridor, including Arch Creek East, Bay Point, Bayside, Biscayne Park, Belle Meade, Buena Vista, Design District, Downtown, Edgewater, El Portal, Hibiscus Island, Keystone Point, Miami Shores, Morningside, North Bay Island, North Miami, Oakland Grove, Palm Grove, Palm Island, Sans Souci, Shorecrest, Star Island, Wynwood, and Venetian Islands www.BiscayneTimes.com Volume 7, Issue 1 Heavy Metal on the Bay THE TITANIUM DREAMS OF OMAR ALI By Terence Cantarella

ot far from Biscayne Boulevard, cigarette, and watching an osprey obses- cigarette to his mouth, almost lights it, stainless-steel sculpture towering 25 feet outside his ramshackle home just sively circling the sun-sparkled waters of but stops. It’s the holy Muslim month of over his head, casting a strange, twisted Nnorth of the 79th Street Cause- Biscayne Bay that stretch before him. Ramadan, smoking is forbidden during shadow over his Shorecrest property and, way drawbridge, Omar Ali is slumped in The bird swoops down, talons out- daylight hours, and he’ll have to wait more fi guratively, over his life. a folding chair, his thin frame draped in stretched, and with a soft splash, snatches until sunset to break his daily fast. Back in 2004, he designed and built well-worn canvas work clothes, his face a fi sh from the water. It rises, shakes off But the 54-year-old Egyptian metal the mammoth piece — a graceful, spheri- turned toward the sun. He’s listening to the water from its plunge, and glides over sculptor isn’t focused on his hunger cal tribute to the famed French explorer Classical South Florida radio over a pair to a rotting wooden piling to feast on or nicotine craving right now. He’s of loudspeakers, fi dgeting with an unlit its writhing prey. Ali smiles. He lifts the mostly thinking about the fi ve-ton, Continued on page 14

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 3 COMMENTARY: FEEDBACK PO Box 370566, Miami, FL 33137 LETTERS TO THE EDITOR Member of the Great Story, Great Bayside: All That Work, with new growth at the tops. But four Florida Press Association Research, Great Tragedy All That Money — Lost for to six weeks ago the tops began to dry out rapidly, and in increasing numbers. www.BiscayneTimes.com “Tragic Drama Under the Miami Water This response indicates a failure to Moon” (February 2009) was a very in- Regarding Jim W. Harper’s review PUBLISHER & EDITOR provide supplemental water once the teresting story. Great research by author of Baywood Park (“Hidden Park, Open rains stopped. Jim Mullin Antolin García Carbonell. Views” February 2009) in our Bayside [email protected] In my opinion, it is critical that I did not recognize the Cuban presi- neighborhood: Once again it seems that supplemental watering be provided over INTERNS dent’s name: Federico Laredo Brú. we the taxpayers have spent a lot of a several-month period after the palms Andrew Leins Manuel Perez-Vichot money for community improvements and are replaced, and the watering should [email protected] Miami the city does not have the foresight of include the oaks as well. The watering David Rodriguez follow-up. I am referring to the landscap- should occur at least until the rains return [email protected] Editor’s note: The left-leaning ing project on 69th Street from Biscayne in June. CONTRIBUTORS Federico Laredo Brú, who attended Boulevard to the bay. Joseph Canale Victor Barrenchea, Pamela Robin Brandt, the wedding of our story subject, Don Medians were built from the Bou- Bayside Terence Cantarella, Bill Citara, Wendy Alfonso de Borbón, served as president levard to the bay starting at the entrance Doscher-Smith, Kathy Glasgow, Jim W. of Cuba from December 24, 1936, to of the Palm Bay Yacht Club. It was a big Harper, Lisa Hartman, Jen Karetnick, Jack October 10, 1940. His successor: Ful- project that took many months of disrup- Bayside: Sparkle King, Derek McCann, Frank Rollason, gencio Batista. tion for the community. Well, it seems Smothered by Swill Silvia Ros, Jeff Shimonski all this work was done, all this money I love Baywood Park and walk there ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES What Secrets Lie Within spent, and guess what? No maintenance every day. However, contrary to what Marco Fernandez the Walls of Miami? was apparently planned. All the plantings Jim W. Harper says in “Hidden Park, [email protected] are all dead or dying, mainly the result of Open Views,” the park does not “sparkle.” I loved “Tragic Drama Under the the city not watering during the fi rst year I have had to call and ask for clean-ups Marc Ruehle Miami Moon.” I was riveted. What a to establish the planting. This is why so several times. [email protected] story! I hope you can do more stories like many people feel that are our taxes are People stop and dump their auto gar- this. It’s fascinating to think about the OFFICE MANAGER being wasted and no one is watching bage in the fi rst bin or eat lunch beside secrets held within the walls of some of the store. the park and dump their garbage. Most Wilmer Ametin Miami’s landmarks. I recently looked at the all plants in of the time cups and boxes are fl ying all [email protected] Thanks for sharing this intriguing story. the medians. There were 16 dead sabal over the place. ART DIRECTOR Kristin Burke palms. It appears that in almost every Marcy Mock Los Angeles case, the palms had begun to fl ush Continued on page 6 [email protected] ADVERTISING DESIGN DP Designs TABLE OF CONTENTS [email protected] COVER STORY POLICE REPORTS The Biscayne Times welcomes proposals Heavy Metal on the Bay ...... 1 Biscayne Crime Beat ...... 28 for articles and press releases. Submitted material may be edited for length, clarity, COMMENTARY and content. All submitted material becomes ART & CULTURE Feedback ...... 4 the property of The Biscayne Times. Please The Book As Artwork ...... 30 be sure to include your name, address and Miami’s King ...... 10 telephone number in all correspondence. Word on the Street ...... 12 Art Listings ...... 32 All articles, photos, and artwork in the Culture Briefs...... 35 Biscayne Times are copyrighted by Biscayne OUR SPONSORS Media, LLC. Any duplication or reprinting BizBuzz ...... 8 COLUMNISTS without authorized written consent from the Advertiser Directory...... 8 publisher is prohibited. Kids and the City: The Parent’s Curse: Damaged Kids ...... 38 The Biscayne Times is published the NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS Harper’s Environment: New Ideas for New Pools ...... 39 first week of each month. We are hand Jen Karetnick: Our Very Own Gastronomic Extravaganza ...... 18 delivered to all the homes along both sides Pawsitively Pets: Just the Two of Us ...... 40 of Biscayne Boulevard from downtown and Frank Rollason: To Stop the Bleeding, Your Garden: Fear and the Fig Whitefly ...... 42 Apply a Tourniquet — To Yourself ...... 20 the Venetian Islands to Arch Creek. Wendy Doscher-Smith: Me and My Foul Mouth ...... 22 Advertise! PARK PATROL COMMUNITY NEWS When Is a Park Not a Park? ...... 36 305-756-6200 You Have Mail — Lots and Lots of It ...... 24 WE NOW ACCEPT Gender Bender Quick Surrender ...... 24 DINING GUIDE Still Waiting for the Train ...... 25 CREDIT CARDS Hidden in Plain View: An Architectural Gem ...... 25 Restaurant Listings ...... 43

4 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 5 COMMENTARY: FEEDBACK

Letters out a primordial shriek of a sort not heard Continued from page 4 since the release of Jurassic Park. “How many times do I have to Obviously Mr. Harper doesn’t visit tell you? This is not our system! This the park very often. My own goal is to means burnt burgers,” Cunningham have the park sparkle, but most of the scolds, fl ipping the thin, square patty time it doesn’t. off the offending veggies with one Marlene Wellington hand, dumping a tub of water on the Bayside hot griddle with the other as she scrubs vigorously with her spatula. About That Royal Castle “She tell it like it is. With a Castle Article… burger, you need that grease. But it’s I live in North Bay Village, and appre- gotta be good grease,” chuckles a woman ciate you sending Biscayne Times across at Royal Castle’s counter. the water to us. Here’s a suggestion: The counter, like almost everything With articles such as the one on Royal else in the diminutive (950 square feet) Castle (“Tiny Little Burgers Make a interior — from major appliances to Big Comeback,” February 2009), or any plumbing pipes — is brand new. Con- other business, please include the address structed in 1956, the miniature MiMo because I defi nitely want to go there for mini-burger palace had been in continu- some little burgers. ous 24/7 operation on its North Miami And you can then use the fact that corner (NW 7th Avenue at 125th Street) more people go to these places as a result until a fi re in August of 2005 wiped out of your articles and you can get more everything but the exterior shell, forcing advertising business! What do you think? its closure for more than three years. Thanks for the BT and great success “I intended to rebuild and reopen in 2009! as soon as possible,” says owner Wayne Jim Carter Arnold, who bought the location in North Bay Village 1982 after Royal Castle, once a thriving Florida-based chain, went belly up. “This restaurant always did good business. But the initial repair estimate was $120,000. I couldn’t manage that.” The fi nal bill turned out to be more than $200,000. “We had to make the structure hurricane-compliant. The original iron plumbing pipes were crumbling, so we couldn’t just attach new PVC. It’s all new plumbing. We put in new walls, a whole roof, a fl oor, booths, all the lighting fi xtures, new air conditioning, new appliances. The Royal Castle? Missing only things we could salvage were one Address? Duh! refrigerator and a freezer.” Editor’s note: A production snafu The sad story’s heroes turned out to scrambled Pamela Robin Brandt’s be North Miami’s Mayor Kevin Burns “Tiny Little Burgers,” about Wayne (who has said that Arnold’s Royal Castle Arnold’s Royal Castle in North Miami. defi nes the city) and the city’s slider- A number of readers, in addition to scarfi ng Community Redevelopment Mr. Carter, were kind enough to draw Agency, which contributed $80,000 our attention to the goof. Here is that toward the repair bill. “I never went to portion of Pam’s story that may have them,” Arnold reveals. “They contacted seemed unintelligible: me. Many people on the board had been Though the lunchtime crush has long customers since they were kids.” passed on a recent Saturday afternoon at That sounds familiar to the 71-year- Arnold’s Royal Castle, veteran manager old Arnold. “It’s like me — I had my fi rst Carlene Cunningham is still dashing slider in 1953 when my family moved to around in a tear. When a new, and still Miami, and there were Royal Castles all very green, cook slaps one of the recently over town. But I still eat a couple a day. reopened eatery’s signature tiny burgers The mayor is a frequent customer, too.” (known to the initiated as sliders) on the griddle atop coal-black onions, she lets Feedback: [email protected]

6 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 7 OUR SPONSORS BizBuzz: March 2009 Sales, special events, and more from the people who make Biscayne Times possible By Pamela Robin Brandt Day special: 15 percent off all oil por- worry about where to place their pur- walls and mixed martial arts. Legacy’s BT Contributor traits (which begin at $400). And because chases. The showroom (6815 Biscayne brand-new facility is also dog-friendly, so the artist is part-Irish, the deal runs for Blvd., 305-757-6001) is offering free your pooch can lounge while you train. p in the frozen north, it’s a bless- the whole month of March. And by the space-planning all month. For those who prefer to train their ing that February is such a short way, if your pet pal is the odd sort, no March is also the time to begin think- palates, the recently revived Friday wine Umonth. But in Miami it ought worries. Kirkwood has painted every- ing about that beloved old oak tree (or tastings at Laurenzo’s Italian Market to last longer, and Chantik Imports is thing from parakeets to pythons and pigs. banyan or magnolia or buttonwood) in continue, with a different theme each doing its part to make that happen. The Everybody complains about the the backyard. Hurricane season will be week. While exact themes are chosen Asian imports company, which celebrated economy, but the River Oyster Bar upon us before we know it, and our good only a week in advance, says the mar- the inauguration of its new Upper East- (650 S. Miami Ave., 305-530-1915) is luck the past couple of years cannot and ket’s sommelier, Larry Baker (aka Larry side store (6667 Biscayne Blvd., 954- doing something about it. On Fridays will not last forever. That’s why Paul the Wine Guy). “I can reveal that we’ll 559-2804) with a grand-opening sale that from noon to 4:30 p.m., accompany Wesley Barnett, the veteran certifi ed be taking people to Greece,” he says. ran throughout February, is extending the your whin- arborist who op- “There’s such a negative stigma about bargain-priced period (up to 35 percent ing with erates Barnett Greek wines due to retsina. 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8 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 9 COMMENTARY: MIAMI’S KING Loose Money, Lousy Deals, and Low-end Jobs When politicians promise you paradise, hold onto your wallet By Jack King their homes and have no jobs. Leading the own, a port tunnel that will be complete- If all this goes according to the BT Contributor opposition to the plan (but with so many ly useless whenever a hurricane threatens, mayors’ plan, we’ll have a billion-dollar caveats it isn’t even funny) is Louisiana’s an art museum that’s supposed to put up tunnel to resolve a problem that could everal weeks ago the New York Gov. Bobby Jindal. He was on one of the construction money for a new home but have been done with $200 million in Times’s Frank Rich had a wonder- Sunday talking-heads programs, where he doesn’t have two nickels, and a science expressway modifi cations; a new science Sful column about how America is in told so many lies about the stimulus pro- museum that’s supposed to do the same museum, even though the one they have full denial about why we have gotten into gram in such a rapid-fi re way that the host but also doesn’t have two nickels. Wow, is not fully utilized; an art museum with this wonderful economic mess. He con- could hardly get in a word. Jindal said he what a quadfecta! no art or money to buy art; and most cluded that we as a nation really didn’t would look at every program to see how it And our two bobblehead mayors disconcerting of all — a baseball stadium want a recession, but didn’t really want worked. What he left out is that he will take are selling this vaporware (a term that we pay for and have no control over. to do anything about it, either. So we just every nickel while trying to make himself means selling software and hardware that That really bothers me. stuck our heads in the sand and kept right look like a conservative Republican. doesn’t yet exist), and they are doing it Personally I think we should have a on spending money we didn’t have. And Jindal has fallen ill to the disease with one word: jobs. No doubt this gets baseball stadium, but not on the terms as long as we got ours, we didn’t care that hits every politician eventually. It is people’s attention. Jobs, especially good the Marlins have written. Unfortunately how much money the banks, investment called “since my party wants me to run for ones, have always been in short supply in they’ve promised the city and county com- houses, corporate America, and their ilk president in South Florida. missioners so much in perks (read: cam- took for themselves. 2012, my head These days paign money) that this may be a done deal. The economic discussion at the na- has gotten so Our mayors are drooling over the they are Unfortunately we won’t know until it’s too tional level is still stuck in the mud, with big I can say stimulus money. They have no moral practically late. And we can’t stop Jeffery Loria from most Republicans taking what they believe anything I want, compunction about taking federal funds. nonexistent. hawking the stadium and selling the Mar- to be the high moral ground and holding no matter how So Manny lins as the city and residents get nothing but They just want to look good at all costs. out for their sacred beliefs: lower taxes, stupid.” How and Carlos the mortgage payment. There’s the reason lower spending, and smaller government. about this for a have taken Loria has money and Alvarez and Diaz are It sure worked well during the Bush years. ticket: Jindal- up the mantra “public servants.” They lowered taxes and increased spending Palin, or Palin-Jindal. Whatever, it would that they are generating new jobs with all At the city level there are two fi rm votes to record levels, but they did make govern- a great American thing to have these two these new projects. for the stadium, and one who has not commit- ment smaller by cutting oversight em- running for the highest offi ce in America And they are right — sort of. Most ted. That’s Michelle Spence-Jones, and based ployees by the thousands at the Food and with a bunch of old, fat, white guys in the of the high-end construction jobs go to on her prior modus operandi, she’s waiting to Drug Administration, the Securities and background running the program. Can you highly skilled, out-of-town workers. They see what the deal will be. My best guess: Joe Exchange Commission, and the Federal say, “House of the Rising Sun?” work, send their money back to where they Sanchez is planning to fi nance his cam- Reserve. It worked really well, unless you But let’s get closer to home. The normally live, and then depart when the paign for mayor with this deal. And Angel liked your bank account, your investment mayors of Miami-Dade and Miami are project is completed. There are quite a few Gonzalez? Well he doesn’t particularly like account, and peanut butter. The Republi- just drooling over the stimulus money. lower-paying jobs that go to local workers, wealthy Cubans or gringos. He’s voting for cans paint the Democrats as tax-and-spend They have no moral compunction about but not nearly the number that the bobble- the stadium just to see them twist in the wind. liberals. I paint the Republicans as borrow- taking federal funds. They just want head mayors would have us believe. Oh, I forgot to add that the City of and-spend idiots. to look good at all costs. Not only are When asked about the low-paying Miami is donating the land, worth about While the Obama stimulus plan has Carlos Alvarez and Manny Diaz willing jobs the construction projects will bring, $100 million, and is building the parking not been well received in Washington to take every nickel the feds will give and the recurring low-paying jobs the garage, worth about $94 million. Think the by Republicans, it has met with mixed them (they must be Democrats), they’re baseball stadium will provide, Mayor Marlins will write an individual thank-you response by the nation’s governors. Seems willing to borrow nearly two billion dol- Diaz said, “What’s the difference? A job note to every resident in the city? like the governors are a little bit closer to lars (wait, they must be Republicans) to is a job.” I’m sure that’s true if you’re a the real people, the ones who are losing build a baseball stadium we don’t really really bad attorney like the good mayor. Feedback: [email protected]

10 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 11 C OMMENTARY: WORD ON THE STREET How do you think an Obama presidency will affect race relations? Compiled by Victor Barrenechea — BT Contributor

Jorge Goya Hassan Shala Rucht D’Oleo Craig Demott Summer Bosworth Catalina Piedrahita Photographer Shop Assistant Fashion Designer Client Specialist Sales Student Downtown Design District North Miami Omni Design District Downtown I don’t think Obama is It’s going to be a long I hope now that Obama is I think it’ll have a big I think it’ll affect it. I think I think it will affect the going to have any kind of process, and we’ll have president people actually impact on race relations. it’ll be positive. I think racial situation because immediate effect. If the to wait, but I think it’s realize that the color of The fact that he was a it’ll make people more now we have a person who economy goes bad, maybe better for everyone. He’s your skin doesn’t matter. I elected president signifi es open-minded. Since he’s is not Caucasian as presi- that will have more of the fi rst black President of hope it breaks down bar- that there’s been a change in power, white people dent, and the president is a an impact on race rela- the United States. There’s riers and helps us realize in middle America, outside have to defer to someone role model a lot of people tions. Then again, I think going to be opportunities that we’re all together and of the major U.S. cities. of another race. I think follow and look up to. He’s the United States is more for everyone. He’s open- all the same. A lot still Inside major U.S. cites, there’ll be more of a sense a person who has a lot of advanced in race rela- ing doors for all people needs to be done, so it’ll things are pretty liberal, but of equality between blacks infl uence. He really gets tions and socio-economic — for immigrants like me. take a while, but I think when you get outside in and whites. I think he’s across to people. I hope relations, more so than my People will say, “He did it, people now have a new middle America, it’s harder opening communications it’ll have a big impact on home country of Argentina. now I can do it.” Anyone kind of consciousness. to convince people. And between races. I think in race. It’s like he’s repre- Things have advanced. I can do it. Younger people, at least now they’re coming around. general it opened a whole senting his entire race, and think now people accept my age, we don’t care Something like that doesn’t new door. If a black man it has created a positive minorities. They had to be about race. It’s going to get change overnight. It has to can become president, stereotype. accepted because they’re better over time, but it will fi lter down, but at least now maybe there’ll be less of a also part of this country take a while. it can fi lter down from the grudge because now some- made of immigrants. top, because he’s the presi- one’s been given a chance. dent of this country.

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Metal precision sculptural objects that are as Continued from page 1 elaborate in design as they are formida- ble in construction. Chairs, benches, fl oor Jacques Cousteau — for a local real- lamps, table lamps, animals, abstractions estate developer named Riccardo Olivieri. — most of his pieces look like something

Olivieri planned to install the work BT photo by Silvia Ros between art and artillery. (For examples, at the eastern entrance to the MacArthur visit www.artaircraft.com.) Causeway, as part of his twin-tower “The best metal is airplane metal,” condo development named the Bentley Ali explains. He turns jet engines into Bay, in full view of the tens of thousands chairs, wings into benches, turbines into of motorists who careen daily across tables, fuel valves into lighting fi xtures, the busy thoroughfare. With such prime steel tubing into faux machine guns. “But skyline positioning, the installation I don’t consider all of that art,” he con- would have been one of the area’s most cedes. Well-designed functional pieces, prominently displayed sculptural artwork like furniture, are just easier to sell. And and would almost certainly have become as for the machine gun, he traded that a local landmark. And of course, the to a local mechanic for $5000 in repair exposure for Ali as an artist would have work on his old truck. been unparalleled. “Real art delivers a message,” he But fi ve years later the sculpture is contends. Art is the 11-foot great blue still here, looming above Ali’s one-story heron spreading its titanium wings on home, rather than overlooking one of Ali’s concrete terrace. Art is the metallic the South Florida’s busiest bridges. Ali fi sh (a grouper?) whose graceful curves reaches for a folder, pulls out a sheet follow the aerodynamic arcs of stainless- of paper, and holds it up. It’s a court steel aircraft parts. Art is the sundial he’s document with a judge’s signature at crafting from a DC-9 engine to com- the bottom. “They bought the piece for memorate the crew of the space shuttle $85,000,” he says dryly, “and sold it back Columbia by directing a single beam of to me for nothing.” sunlight onto the name of each astronaut The path that led up to, and then at different hours throughout the day. veered sharply away from, artistic suc- Ever since Ali was a boy in Cairo, cess was a long one for Ali. He’d like to his creative tastes have leaned toward the think he’ll still get another shot at a high- industrial, the mechanical, and especially profi le installation. For now, though, he’s militaria. “My father was a genius with eager to tell the story of his abandoned his hands,” he recalls. A mechanic by sculpture and of all the legal wrangling trade, Ali’s father would scour Cairo for that came with it. old automobile parts, refurbish them, and Not many people know the reclusive assemble large, fortifi ed work trucks, Ali or of his fi erce brand of metal work. Ali’s tribute to Jacques Cousteau awaits a buyer, perhaps in Abu Dhabi. which he would later sell. He doesn’t leave his house much, he Ali quickly began to mimic the old rarely exhibits, and most of all he doesn’t man, building his own toys in a similar like to be separated from his tools. In fashion. He’d rig small electric motors fact his home and his studio are one in to empty tomato cans to make toy cars. A the same — a shoddy former boat-repair neighbor in uniform infl uenced him, too. yard and work shed that he converted “There was a military guy in my building,” into a makeshift home. Roll-down metal he recalls, “and every morning soldiers shutters serve as doors, the exposed would come pick him up in a big, brand- concrete walls are lined with metallic new Land Rover. I fell in love with that sculptures and tools, and the unaircon- car and with everything military.” Even- ditioned bedroom he constructed in the Ali Photo illustration courtesy of Omar tually Ali started using his father’s tools back sits so close to Biscayne Bay he can to make mini tanks instead of cars. hear the water gently lapping the seawall But at age 17, seeing no future for as he falls asleep at night. himself in his impoverished homeland, Ali spends his days drafting intricate he obtained an Italian tourist visa — the designs, occasionally heading out in easiest and cheapest visa Egyptians could his 1989 Chevy pickup to scavenge for get in the 1970s — and headed for Rome. airplane and military parts at scrap yards Circo Nones Orfei, an Italian circus, re- along the Miami River or at military cruited him at Rome’s main train station and government auctions. The titanium on his very fi rst day in the country, the and stainless steel, of which those parts station being a popular hunting ground are often made, are Ali’s metals of choice. He doesn’t build. He “engineers” The Cousteau sculpture as it would have appeared at the Bentley Bay. Continued on page 15

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Metal the metallic interior of Jail, a former bar Continued from page 14 and lounge designed to look like a prison inside the Bentley Hotel at 510 Ocean for immigrant labor. Dr. And it was the owner of that hotel, “I cleaned up a lot of animal dung in prominent South Florida developer Ric- the beginning,” he says. With time, and cardo Olivieri, who would later commis-

once he had learned enough Italian, the sion him to create his colossal Jacques Ali Photo courtesy of Omar circus manager upgraded him to help- Cousteau. ing care for the elephants and creating Olivieri, an Italian businessman now promotional artwork. “Italy was para- in his 60s, was not only a developer but dise,” he remembers. “I spent four years also an art-lover who adorned his Miami with the circus and saw the entire country. Beach buildings with designer materials, But there were a lot of dangerous people fi ne paintings, and pricey sculptures. In in the circus — criminals, lunatics, all 2003 his largest South Beach develop- kinds.” ment, the Bentley Bay condo towers Tired of the vagabond lifestyle, Ali at 520 and 540 West Ave., was under settled in Milan in 1976 and began to construction and he wanted the project to concentrate on his art. He rented a ma- refl ect his artistic taste and make a bold chine shop and began experimenting with statement. Forklift ant with driver’s seat. leather and jewelry, churning out purses, Familiar with Omar Ali’s workman- belts, amulets, and lockets. Functional ship, and having already seen a miniature metalwork like lamps, gates, windows, version of Ali’s Jacques Cousteau briefl y him $60,000 to design and construct the few thousand dollars of his own money and doors helped to pay the bills, too. In on display in his Ocean Drive hotel, Ol- full-size Jacques Cousteau piece. The on materials and equipment. He also his free time, ivieri decided price tag mostly refl ected the market cost found that Olivieri had become impos- he began that a 25-foot of stainless steel, heavy-duty equipment sible to reach, and Ali was left wonder- sculpting, “In 1999, when I arrived, Miami was version of required for the job, and labor. Upon ing if he should even continue work on exhibiting the artwork completion, Olivieri was to arrange for his sculpture, or if he’d ever be able to beautiful. The lifestyle was free and widely and would perfect- transportation of the 9000-pound sculp- recoup his expenses should the agree- even enjoying everything was easy. I managed to get a ly compliment ture by barge across Biscayne Bay and ment fall apart. extensive cov- work permit, found some decent work.” the Bentley have it hoisted by crane into position at The bankruptcy case came before a erage in Italian Bay’s sail- the Bentley Bay. Alternatively, the sculp- federal judge in August 2004, and Ali’s newspapers. shaped condo ture would cross the bay by helicopter, if agreement with Olivieri was among the But, he says, towers and consulting engineers felt that would be contractual obligations the judge ordered the country experienced an economic refl ect the development’s distinct nautical more practical. to be honored. Moreover, to account for downturn in the 1990s and it became in- theme. And of course, placed atop the What Ali didn’t know at the time, the rapidly increasing price of stainless creasingly diffi cult to make a living. Ali stairwell tower rising above the condo’s however, was that a pending foreclosure steel, an amended contract for $80,000 could no longer afford his rent. He lost multistory parking garage, the sculpture hearing on the Bentley Bay had forced was signed and Ali was instructed to the workshop, sold his tools, and after 28 would be visible to every South Beach Olivieri’s company, Florida Development complete his sculpture within 120 days. years in Italy, packed up and headed for visitor coming across the MacArthur Associates, to fi le for bankruptcy four He received payment in full, hired sev- Miami on the advice of a friend who had Causeway, turning the artwork, and the months before signing the contract with eral workers, and on December 21, 2004, alreadyyg emigrated. Bentleyyy, Bay, into a Miami landmark. him. Whyyg Olivieri entered into an agree- after almost six months of meticulous “In 1999,1999, when I arrived,arrived, Miami was According to Ali’s mementnt wwithith Ali in ththee mimidstdst ooff fi nannancialcial planning and labor, his sweeping, 25-by- beautiful,”beautiful,” Ali recalls. “The lifestyle was records,records, contractscontracts didifffi ccultiesulties iiss ununclear.clear. BT’s eeffortsfforts ttoo cocon-n- 19-foot Jacques Cousteau sculpture, freefree and everything was easy. I managed were drawn up ttactact him fforor cocommentmment wewerere uunsuccessful.nsuccessful. complete with sharks, a shark cage, and toto getget a work permit,permit, found some decentdecent inin JulyJuly 2004 By the time Ali learned of the abstract representations of waves and workwork here and there, and bought my and OlivieriOlivieri bankruptcy, a few weeks after signing the sails, stood ready on the concrete patio house.”house.” Notable among his proj- agreed ccontract,ontract, he had already spent a $5000 outside his house. ects,ects, he created and installed toto pay deposit from Olivieri and had invested a But a year and half would pass without anyone from the Bentley Bay coming to pick it up. According to Ali, whenever he would call the attorney representing the Bentley’s interests at the time, the lawyer would cite issues with Miami Beach permits relating to the artwork’s installation as reasons for Photo courtesy of Omar Ali Photo courtesy of Omar the delay. “They never showed me any proof that they contacted the city,” Ali Light Fixture No. 7. complains, “and they never asked me for my drawings or sent an engineer to discuss the installation and to draft

Continued on page 16

March 2009 BiscayneBiscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.comwww.BiscayneTimes.com 15 COVER STORY

Metal costs he was incurring them up a bit and they realized just how Continued from page 15 for storage, mainte- bad this could get for them,” Scott says nance, labor, attorney of the Bentley’s legal team. “I simply engineering papers.” Those papers, he fees, and more. All presented an offer and we negotiated says, would have been necessary for the this, he asserted, back and forth until we worked it out. It

city to determine whether installation added up to at least BT photo by Silvia Ros was defi nitely a heavy-duty negotiation, was permissible. $300,000. Ali did not though.” Over time it became clear that no expect to receive mon- To Ali’s surprise, just three weeks one was going to collect the sculpture. etary damages, but he later, in October 2008, the Bentley Bay The problem, however, was that Ali hoped at least to pro- gave him what he needed, a court order couldn’t sell it. Technically it didn’t voke the Bentley Bay signed by federal Judge A. Jay Cristol belong to him, since the Bentley Bay had into giving him a legal granting him full ownership rights to already paid for it. Selling it, he surmised, document restoring Jacques Cousteau, with a stipulation could put him in the position of having to his ownership rights to that he “shall not have any further claim” repay the Bentley Bay should they sud- the sculpture — which against the Bentley Bay. “I could have denly decide they wanted it. he claims actually cost pressed my case and tried to get more Ali went through a string of him $120,000 in total, money from them,” Ali says, “but I was lawyers to see if he could regain legal $35,000 more than he happy not to give them the sculpture in ownership but, he says, three and a received in payment. Great blue heron at the end. They might have chopped it up half years passed with little communi- When he didn’t Ali’s bayfront studio and sold it for scrap.” cation and no progress. The sculpture get a response, he workshop. “The challenge now,” he says, “is remained on Ali’s property, requiring hired what he calls to fi nd a buyer. I’m trying to sell it to upkeep and safety preparations with an “honest lawyer,” a collectors in Abu Dhabi, where there’s a each hurricane season to prevent the Miami attorney named huge art market, because honestly, good piece from being destroyed or toppling William Sumner Scott, public art doesn’t exist in Miami.” over onto his house. who managed to get Of the hundreds of publicly dis- Frustrated, Ali drafted a demand results where others played works of art countywide, he letter to the Bentley Bay’s attorneys, had failed. “Perhaps threatening legal action and citing the Omar’s letter softened Continued on page 17

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Metal his best work is all around him. “I’ve Continued from page 16 always lived in my studio,” he says. “I love to have my tools next to my bed. points out, hardly any are known outside When I can’t sleep, I get up and make of the Miami area, and very few are something. Creating things relaxes me.”

memorable to most locals. “Cheap art is He has about 50 cherished pieces BT photo by Silvia Ros unhealthy,” Ali says. “People are losing he holds onto like offspring, ranging trust in artists, and it’s because of all the from representational to abstract. “If bad art that’s around.” someone loves them enough to pay the Regarding his own work, he refuses high price,” he says, “I’ll sell them. to show in galleries because he rejects Otherwise, when I die, I want them all the commission structure most of them thrown into the ocean.” use. “They take half your blood,” he Omar Ali’s work inhabits a creative realm where design and fi ne art co-exist, where the boundar- Omar Ali’s work inhabits a creative ies between form and function realm where design and fi ne art tend to blur, where imagina- co-exist, where the boundaries tion knows no limits. But the between form and function tend enchantment Ali sells comes at to blur. a price few art afi cionados are able to pay. “Since I’ve been Omar Ali: If he can’t sell his work, he’ll have it sent to the bottom of here in the U.S.,” he says, “I’ve the sea. says, and he simply won’t “give [his] life been surviving, that’s all, doing small prac- to them.” But with little in the way of tical jobs here and there.” He’d like to think permanent home where it can be appreci- of Biscayne Bay stretched out before commissioned work, lack of exposure is that the quality of his work will someday ated. If not, he’ll commit it to the watery him, fi nally puts his unlit cigarette back a major issue for Ali. be recognized, and that he will once again world of its French namesake. He’ll have in the pack, and mutters, “It’s written in Still, he can’t imagine doing any- be able to make a decent living from it. it sent to the bottom of the Atlantic. my will.” thing else but create art: “When you love As for his Jacques Cousteau, he’s With a trace of heartache in his something, you do your best work.” And holding out hope that it will fi nd a voice, Ali turns to the quivering waters Feedback: [email protected]

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 17 NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS: MIAMI SHORES Our Very Own Gastronomic Extravaganza Taste of the Shores can be a reality with your help. So let’s go! By Jen Karetnick in price (lodging and airfare for partici- BT Contributor pants), and the chefs, their vendors, and the players all volunteer their time, products, he day before the Super Bowl, I and services, operating costs are extremely did something that, despite bat- low. So the funds that come in? To mix Ttling a stubborn case of bronchitis, sporting metaphors, they’re mostly all was all-too-characteristic of me: I drove net, and they’re distributed to Share Our 275 miles for grub. Of course, this wasn’t Strength charities that feed the hungry. just any old chow. I made the trek from Coincidentally, my food-writing career Miami Shores to Tampa for Taste of the Donoghue by Tom of the NFL Taste also began in 1992, and since then I’ve NFL, also known as “Party with a Pur- been to countless walk-around food-and- pose,” one of the premier food-and-wine wine tastings, most of all which raise fundraising events in the nation. money for a good cause. But I attended Founded in Minneapolis in 1992, Taste of the NFL with a different purpose where the Super Bowl was held that year, in mind, which was to huddle with my Taste of the NFL raised $90,000 for local players (such as QB Earl Morrall from hundreds of dollars per ticket (thousands sister, who was broadcasting live from the and national hunger organizations in its the undefeated Dolphins). To date, ap- for VIP tables) not only feast on signa- event for Martha Stewart Living Sirius fi rst outing. Since then each Super Bowl proximately $7 million has been raised. ture delicacies and sample Gallo wines Satellite Radio (also in the food biz, Betsy city, on the eve of the big game, hosts Though improvements are made an- that are paired with the goodies, but they is the co-host for the morning drive show). this gastronomic extravaganza, in which nually, and guest celebrities change, the purchase footballs, aprons, cookbooks, Just kidding, of course. I love my each city with an NFL team is represent- format remains: The chefs set up tasting caps, and auctioned sports memorabilia sister and was delighted to spend time ed by top-name chefs (like our very own tables and the players perch at their for both toques and athletes to autograph. with her — and crash in her hotel room. Allen Susser of Chef Allen’s, pictured own stations beside them in the middle Because Taste of the NFL founder But I really went to Taste of the NFL here with former Dolphin Dick Ander- of a venue — in the case of Tampa, Wayne Kostroski and his crew manage to son), along with off-season and alumni Tropicana Field. Partygoers, who pay get almost everything donated or reduced Continued on page 19

18 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS: MIAMI SHORES

Taste knows, maybe come up with a brand-new same, designating monies for the entity nontraditional,” Williams notes. “We have a Continued from page 18 one — and am open to all ideas. that I believe is the most neglected in lot of parents who don’t, or can’t, participate For another thing, Taste of the NFL town: Miami Shores Elementary School. at all in the PTA or in the school.” because I fully intend to make into a re- has a distinct aura of sophistication. It’s I know all our schools are struggling in To that end, the MS Elementary PTA is ality what I proposed a few months ago: for adults. I’ve long been a proponent of this economy. At Miami Country Day, which presenting its own food festival on April 24, revitalizing a Taste of the Shores. bringing my kids to fi ne-dining restaurants my kids attend, tuition has gone up but teach- called Caribbean Carnivale. Williams es- Response to that column has been inspir- and chic functions, and I hope you do too. ers and staff are still being laid off, which timates that 80 percent of the student body ing. Not only do residents want to see such But when it comes to Taste of the Shores, I is heartbreaking for everybody. But Shores is of Afro-Carib origin, but she empha- an event happen in our village, several have don’t want it to be about chocolate-fl avored Elementary suffers from a complex problem. sizes the diversity of those ethnicities. The already come forward to lend a hand, includ- face paint. We already have Unity Day Chief among its diffi culties is a poor Carnivale, which will have booths featuring ing our own publisher, who says Biscayne community image, thanks in part dishes from Haiti, Jamaica, Trinidad, Cuba, Times will happily be a sponsor. to its socio-economic demo- Puerto Rico, and the Dominican Repub- Given that the original Taste of the I went to Taste of the NFL because graphic, and how that’s perceived. lic, plus Haitian dancers and a Bahamian Shores turned out to be the model for Second to that is money itself, junkanoo band, is meant to unite those I fully intend to make into a reality festivals such as Taste of the Grove and an infl ux of which could help cultures both within the school and within many others, I have little interest in what I proposed a few months ago: to change the image. “The new the Shores. “It’s more of a friend-raiser than spearheading a revival of what once was. revitalizing a Taste of the Shores. administration is great,” says a fundraiser,” Williams says. The event, So I do believe research is in order, not Judith Williams, a member of the which will run from 5:30 to 8:00 p.m., will to mention forming a committee. PTA, whose son is in the third be open to students, their families, and I chose Taste of the NFL initially to grade after switching from Aida friends of the school. study as a model for a few reasons. For and the Marshmallow Drop and St. Rose’s Merritt a little over a year ago. “Most of the To my mind, a friend-raiser is the per- starters, it has a fi rm identity that allows Carnival and a whole bunch of other truly teachers are very passionate and have been fect fi rst step in the right direction. Want to for terrifi c tie-ins. Taste of the Shores great family-style events in Miami Shores. there a long time. A lot of us are convinced join me in taking the second one? Send me could draw on our village’s agricul- It’s time to give the grown-ups a night out the school is being overlooked.” an e-mail ([email protected]) tural past, and certainly we have plenty of in their own backyard. While Williams and Margarita Mesa, And next year, when Taste of the mango trees to support that. And it could Finally, Taste of the NFL targeted a current PTA president, are among the moti- NFL comes to Miami, maybe they’ll take on an appropriate annual theme, like recipient for its fundraising from the fi rst vators who work on the school’s behalf, they learn something from us. renewal, that plays into that identity. But day, and its mission has never altered. have trouble eliciting participation from the I’m looking to refi ne that angle — or who I’d like to see Taste of the Shores do the students’ parents. “Many of the homes are Feedback: [email protected]

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 19 NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS: BELLE MEADE To Stop the Bleeding, Apply a Tourniquet — To Yourself Need to cut costs? Here are seven tough decisions local politicos could make By Frank Rollason Today, facing a grave fi nancial crisis, BT Contributor we are dealing with a city budget that has grown from $313 million in 1999 t’s early morning on Friday the 13th to more than $523 million in 2008 — a as I pen this column. This is an 60-percent increase in less than ten Iauspicious day for our community, years! Without doubt it’s time to make for in a few hours, both the city and some genuinely “tough decisions,” so the county will (theoretically) make a let’s consider a few that commissioners Yes or No decision on the new Marlin’s could enact immediately, that no one baseball stadium. would fi nd objectionable, and that every- My thoughts today, however, are one would see as more than symbolic. not about the stadium. They’ve been Tough Decision #1 Freeze their own triggered by an opinion piece by Miami salaries ($58,200), independent of any Commissioner Marc Sarnoff that ap- other action involving any other employ- peared in the Miami Herald on January own belt, one of the “tough decisions” their salaries and benefi ts. Nonunion ees. Just do it! 26, entitled, “Freeze City Employ- elected leaders must make. There was employees serve at the will of the Tough Decision #2 Reduce their ees’ Salaries.” In it, the commissioner no call for the manager to renegotiate manager and are safer targets for such own staffs dramatically. Just do it! In invokes the words of President Obama: existing union contracts to achieve the a “symbolic move.” tough times, you have to believe their “Families are tightening their belts, so same freeze. This is not only a permit- A few days after “Freeze” appeared, offi ces could be run with two staff per- should Washington.” The premise was ted course of action, but it’s certainly a a rebuttal appeared from Miami Com- sonnel. Certainly eliminate all contract that freezing the salaries of nonunion viable option if the city is in dire fi nan- missioner Michelle Spence-Jones. Her employees. employees, including each commis- cial straits. closing summed it up: “A tough decision Tough Decision #3 Eliminate the sioner and staff (no mention of the However, union families vote in is asking for salary freezes across the commissioners’ sergeant-at-arms. Just mayor), would be a “symbolic move” great numbers and are very active in board, including for the unions, but that showing that the city is tightening its supporting candidates who protect was not proffered.” Continued on page 21

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20 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS: BELLE MEADE

Tourniquet reimbursement for offi cial city business for drastic measures, like driving your To put this in perspective, consider Continued from page 20 instead of a blanket amount. Right now own car to and from work and to various former Commissioner J.L. Plummer, who I have a personal family plan with fi ve events throughout the city you love and served the city as an elected offi cial for 29 do it! Sworn police offi cers providing phones and virtually unlimited minutes, serve selfl essly. years. He left city hall in 1999, before the chauffeur and bodyguard services? two of them Blackberries with e-mail, Tough Decision #7 Eliminate their current pension plan was in place. Today he What kind of message does it send when and it runs just under $4200 a year. I’d pension. Just do it! This one is a beauty. receives an annual pension of just $29,471. commissioners feel they must have a venture to say the cost of conducting city Here we have a noncontributory plan It is unconscionable that individuals bodyguard to move around their own business on one phone would be a hell of (noncontributory for the commissioners, serving at the will of the public, for the city? This would put two or three more a lot cheaper than $3900 per year. but all contributory for the taxpayers) that purpose of performing the work of the offi cers back on the street, where they’re Tough Decision #6 Eliminate their essentially provides 50 percent of their public, be rewarded so much for so little. really needed. annual car allowance ($10,800). Just do highest two years’ earnings for the rest I’m in a position to say that because, Tough Decision #4 Eliminate their it! Most of us drive a car to and from of their lives after serving as a commis- after serving 33 years as a fi refi ghter for annual expense account ($32,000). Just work, and some of us are able to receive sioner for only seven years. Notice I said the City of Miami (of which I am very do it! Every commissioner receives this reimbursement for mileage other than “earnings” not “salaries.” This means their proud), I receive a pension of roughly gift, which was unilaterally (and quietly) normal commuting. Commissioners pensions are based on salary ($58,200), $100,000 annually — but I contributed provided by a previous city manager as a could be entitled to the same. This al- expense account ($32,000), car allowance ten percent of my salary each and every way to increase commissioners’ com- lowance is also supposed to cover the ($10,800), and phone allowance ($3900), year to make that pension possible. pensation. To his credit, Commissioner cost auto insurance, which in most cases for a total of $104,900. That results in a Seven tough decisions that could be Johnny Winton refused to take this includes the commissioner’s spouses. minimum lifetime pension of more than made by our elected leaders. They could freebie. To date, I believe, he is the only Such policies are normally issued in the $52,000 annually, a pension that an aver- fashion them as a package and do it to- commissioner who has ever turned it names both spouses’ jointly. This relates age city employee would have work more morrow. A personal sacrifi ce that would down. This generous benefi t, by the way, to Tough Decision #3 — eliminating the than 30 years to receive. set an example for all. As Commissioner requires nothing of commissioners — no sergeant-at-arms. Currently commis- Notice that I said “minimum” lifetime Sarnoff so eloquently wrote: “It’s now up accounting, no records, no justifi cations, sioners not only enjoy the use of a police pension. Here’s the catch: After seven years, to each of us to follow the lead of Presi- no oversight, no nothing. chauffeur, they also receive an annual elected offi cials receive an additional 5 dent Obama and ‘make a clean break Tough Decision #5 Eliminate their car allowance, yet the car can sit at percent above the 50 percent for each year of from business as usual’ for the best inter- annual phone allowance ($3900). Just home in the garage! Some commission- service, up to 100 percent of earnings. (If a est of all of our constituents.” do it! This one is arguably a justifi ed ers utilize the police chauffeur service commissioner becomes mayor, those years expense, but it could be handled as a more than others, but drastic times call also count above the minimum of seven.) Feedback: [email protected]

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 21 NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS: BISCAYNE PARK Me and My Foul Mouth One more way in which the Merciless Frozen Tundra is defi nitely not Miami By Wendy Doscher-Smith I knew. He was always swearing. So was I. BT Contributor However, if I said, “When I graduate high school,” I was promptly corrected: “When ’ll never forget the day my kindergarten I graduate from high school.” teacher threatened to wash my mouth Before he became a full-time lawyer, Iout with soap. Ms. Spatafora grabbed my father taught English at the Univer- my arm and dragged me over to the jani- sity of Miami. He knew all about “bad tor’s closet, pushed my head down over a words,” but he didn’t believe that any sludgy bar of brownish soap, and into the words were truly “bad.” As for percep- industrial-grade, double-wide steel sink. Doscher-Smith BT photo by Wendy tions? Well, the man just didn’t give a But I wriggled away from her, twist- fuck. He cared about proper usage of ing my arm out of her grasp, screaming curse words. that I would “sue her” if she touched me I learned that using “bad words” too again. She didn’t. often was not a good idea because it My past is littered with these sorts of mo- cheapened the effect of the words and ments. I never took well to authority. It wasn’t lessened their impact. That mattered. a question of my ornery nature. I simply In Biscayne Park or surrounding didn’t believe anyone deserved my respect areas, I never got in trouble for swearing. or trust until they earned it. And I didn’t wrote it 100 times and waited for my pretended to be upset and I yawned. The But I also did not fraternize with people appreciate the presumption made by adults father to pick me up. He arrived, and director did not seem satisfi ed. who believe language censorship is one that just because they lived longer they knew the director glared at me as she told my “See? I told you he wouldn’t care,” I of life’s top priorities. better. More than often, they did not. father I was bad. I sat on my metal-and- said to her as I gathered my book bag. I Yet I’ll be damned, as I have unin- When I was ten, the director of my plastic chair in the deserted school caf- gave her a smug smile and walked out. tentionally run into the same language after-school program instructed me to eteria and watched as her buggy eyeballs My father didn’t care because he was write 100 times “I will not talk back.” I darted back and forth between us. He the one who taught me all the curse words Continued on page 25

22 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 NEIGHBORHOOD CORRESPONDENTS: BISCAYNE PARK

Foul Mouth my hair, but a person (me) who uttered happened to “Respect your elders?” horrible things across the salon. So I Continued from page 24 something called an “f-bomb.” What did I even say? I listened to the fi nally told him I couldn’t do his hair “What?” was the best I could imme- music playing and the hair dryers whirl- here anymore. He was not appropriate problem up here in Binghamton, New diately muster. ing. How could anyone hear me talking for the salon.” York, or what I call the Merciless Frozen I thought back to my salon in the anyway? Are there kids around? No. I Again, I sat speechless. What was this? Tundra, MFT. I was recently repri- Biscayne Corridor, the one with the man- had already checked for that. And of A threat? Now I was not appropriate? manded for my foul mouth. And sinks datory French Maid costumes and sexy course ultimately: Who the fuck cared? Sensing my seething, she gave me a played a part once more, as this time my themed days. I could not begin to count The answer was that Bea cared. friendly pat on the shoulder. “Wendy,” she hair colorist played Ms. Spatafora in the the “f-bombs” that detonated in that Thousands of miles away and years later, continued, “it’s not a big deal. I don’t care! dirty-word drama. salon. And in that moment, I realized I had stumbled onto an inked-up version It’s just, ya know, tone it down is all.” I get my hair done at a salon in the just how far I was from home. of Ms. Spatafora. Oh really? So now Bea is a colorist, a city — which is quite gritty, actually — “You know,” Bea said, dipping her I thought about walking out. One judge of character, and a liar. by a woman who is covered in tattoos, brush in a stained cup, “we try to keep problem: It was characteristically 19 She sauntered away to check on worked as a stripper, had a job in a porn this place classy and professional. We degrees outside, and I looked like some- another client. shop, and used to hang by hooks in a have some older ladies come in here. thing from Planet Zar with my foiled, I was pissed. My heart was pounding circus. None of this mattered to me. She Some church ladies! They would faint wet, half-colored head. Damned MFT. in my head. But something else was hap- happens to be an okay colorist. But the at that language! It’s okay if certain So as usual I tried to talk it out. “But pening as well. I was sent to the prin- last time I went in, Bea told me I had to customers are here.” Bea,” I said, “I don’t understand the cipal’s offi ce once. For kissing a boy in “tone it down.” I looked around. Seconds before my problem. I’m your client. It’s not you the second grade. And this was the same I thought she must have been talking reprimand, an “older lady” had smiled at saying, um, f-bombs.” feeling I had back then: shame. about my hair. No. She was referring to me while looking up from her magazine. “Yes,” Bea continued, twirling a Shame. Perhaps the dirtiest word of all. my language. Did she go to church? Did she worship piece of wet hair in her gloved hand Bea fi nished my hair, and messed “It’s just, well,” Bea said as she poked at the altar of the Filthy Mouth and Con- and placing it atop my head, “but I have up my highlights in the process. But at a piece of foil on top of my damp head. taminated Soul? a sinus infection, so if I can hear you, that’s not why I never returned. I “It’s not cool. All those f-bombs.” I remained speechless, but I was anyone can. Plus what you do refl ects on don’t want a lecture. And if shame is F-bombs? Was she serious? thinking along these lines: What hap- me and the entire salon, really.” involved, I’d better at least get a kiss I stared at her in the mirror, which pened to “The customer is always right?” Oh? I stared at her and chewed my lip. for my troubles. refl ected, apparently, not just a gloppy How much younger than me is this “Look,” she continued, “I had a guy mess of red pigment that used to be tattooed little bitch? And then: What in here once. He used to scream horrible, Feedback: [email protected]

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 23 COMMUNITY NEWS You’ve Got Mail – Lots and Lots of It Are you in Steve Hagen’s address book? Should you be? By Erik Bojnansky among other things, committed the Special to BT county to providing $100 million for a new Miami Art Museum (MAM) and teve Hagen isn’t pitching subscrip- $175 million for a new Museum of tions, pretending he’s Nigerian Science. But the deal was that MAM’s Sroyalty, or offering you a job as a board of directors was supposed to raise telemarketer. But his barrages of e-mails more than $120 million on its own for to civic-minded Miamians still get him its project, and the science museum’s pegged by some as a nuisance — which board would similarly come up with at is unfortunate, his fans say. least $100 million. That was before the “He can be very irritating,” concedes economy went south. Greg Bush, a founder of the Urban Envi- Hagen thinks the museums do not ronment League, history professor at the have the money to kick in their share, University of Miami, and one of Hagen’s and he isn’t shy about sharing his views admirers. “He sends so many damn with anyone who’ll listen. He also criti- e-mails, and sometimes he needs to edit From his home offi ce in Belle Meade, Steve Hagen keeps you informed, cizes what he sees as MAM’s profl igate himself a little more.” whether you like it or not. spending practices. According to the “He can type about 75 words a minute, museum’s tax returns from 2005 and but [his mind] moves at 190 words a are proceeding in a drive to create two dozen others. “Pledges are not very 2006, MAM invested $55,708 in lobby- minute,” laughs Coconut Grove activist new facilities for themselves. Hagen much either... We are in year two, I think, ing governments, paid $286,397 in 2006 and Miami Neighborhoods United member believes the Miami Art Museum and of their capital campaigns...What they have to hire Terence Riley as the museum’s Nina West. “He has all kinds of spelling the Miami Museum of Science are not raised, they have spent on consultants...” executive director, and spent $1.8 million mistakes. He’s lousy at that. And he doesn’t being forthright about their fundraising So where does that leave the build- on “professional fees.” put in periods or commas.” campaigns to build fancy new homes on ing drive? And assuming it goes forward, “Big sucking sound, as Ross Perot However, those who direct Hagen’s an eight-acre chunk of Bicentennial Park who will really end up paying for it? would say, as the fees leave Miami, ” missives straight to the trash bin may be in downtown Miami. Hagen, typically, is better at asking ques- Hagen wrote in a January e-mail. “Ques- missing some valuable substance in the “According to a reliable source, the tions than answering them. tion is: Are they [MAM] going to raise their deluge of Hagen-speak. His most recent museums have essentially no money in The controversy goes back to 2004, 150 million... Or are we Miami taxpayers crusade, for example, raises troubling their capital campaign accounts,” Hagen when Miami-Dade voters approved questions about how two local museums wrote in a recent e-mail to BT and some a $553 million bond measure, which, Continued on page 27 Gender Bender Quick Surrender Naked ladies didn’t draw crowds to the Boulevard Theater, so it’s back to boys By Erik Bojnansky Special to BT “It was doing really good before,” that tanked, he tried a gay format, which Fran Rollason, president of the says Griffi th, referring to a previous he says had a respectable following. But MiMo Biscayne Association and a Belle omeday Leroy Griffi th is going to incarnation of At The Boulevard that ex- he was lured back to female strippers Meade resident, is pretty much resigned get it right. Someday the owner isted six months ago — until he decided after talking to a guy with an impressive to the Boulevard being an adult venue in Sof the Boulevard Theater at 7770 to shut it down and convert the landmark adult-entertainment résumé who prom- one form or another. “I have to be quite Biscayne Blvd. will fi nd the right combi- theater to a traditional strip club called ised him a quality operation. honest with you, I really don’t even pay nation of striptease specialists, burlesque Club Madonna II. (Madonna I is his adult Griffi th then left town for a vacation. attention,” she says, “They’re just there. acts, or X-rated movies, and Griffi th will club on South Beach.) When he returned, Griffi th says, he paid It would be really nice if something else stop experimenting with the formula, Griffith has owned the Boulevard the club a visit. That “quality operation” were there, like an independent fi lm like a frustrated interior designer moving Theater since 1971, transforming the amounted to six lonely dancers. He shut cinema. But whatever he wants to do — furniture around in a showroom. single-screen, family-oriented movie down Madonna II after only two weeks it’s his building.” In the meantime the veteran adult- house into a burlesque theater and, of operation. Griffi th apparently isn’t through ex- entertainment impresario is at it again later, a triple-X cinema. In recent Griffi th says he has now sunk perimenting, though. He’s open to using — as local civic leaders, once eager to times, the Boulevard has switched another $200,000 into renovations, in- the theater as a nightclub without naked shut the place down, look on with world- from a nightclub with female strip- cluding expanding the main dance fl oor. dancers. How about jazz nights at the weary indifference. Griffi th recently pers to a nightclub with male strip- He has kept a small porno theater in Boulevard, or a Minsky-style burlesque switched again, from nude women back pers so many times that, during an the complex but removed a parking fee, theater, with comedians, chorus girls, to scantily clad men. The venue has been interview with BT, even Griffith had lowered the price of admission, and vaudeville acts? “Maybe we can get re-re-christened At the Boulevard, and trouble keeping track. added drink specials. “I hope it works,” Jackie Mason,” he jokes. it celebrated its grand re-re-opening on Last year he leased the club to a he says of the latest incarnation. “Who Maybe he could. No joke. Valentine’s Day weekend. Three nights a group that ran Black Gold, a strip club knows what will happen down the week, it’s where the boys are. aimed at African-American men. When road? That’s up to neighborhood.” Feedback: [email protected]

24 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 COMMUNITY NEWS Still Waiting for the Train Biscayne Corridor residents to FDOT: Yes! And please hurry! By Terence Cantarella NE 209th St Beach, passes through the centers of 28 project reps, and ask questions following BT Contributor FDOT’S NE 198th St South Florida cities, making it an obvious a half-hour presentation. proposed NE 194th St candidate for commuter-rail services and Sue Gibbons of Gannett Fleming, the outh Florida, like many densely commuter the focus of FDOT’s study. consulting fi rm working on the rail study, populated metro regions around stations. Built by oil and hotel magnate Henry began the evening with these prophetic the nation, is planning to expand Flagler in the late 19th Century, the FEC words: “If you think congestion is bad today, S NE 163rd St commuter-rail transit in an effort to curb played a major role in Florida’s develop- there’s an enormous amount of growth that’s traffi c congestion, create jobs, lower NE 151st St ment, bringing goods and people to the going to take place between now and 2030, emissions, and reduce fuel dependence. once inaccessible southern end of the and it’s only going to get worse.” The only problem, say many Biscayne NE 135th St peninsula. But competition from cars, Within the 100-foot-wide FEC corridor, Corridor residents, is that it’s not happen- NE 125th St affordable air travel, and problems posed she explained, there’s room for up to fi ve ing fast enough. by a workers’ strike brought passenger tracks, so a combination of local, express, Some 50 people showed up at the NE 107th St service to an abrupt end in 1968, and the and even inter-city Amtrak trains is pos- Miami Shores Country Club on the NE 100th St railroad has carried nothing but freight sible. But she cautioned, “In the very best evening February 12 for the Florida ever since. Reinstating passenger service of circumstances, it’s going to be six years Department of Transportation’s “Phase 2 NE 87th St today, says FDOT, would not only ease or more before we actually have service Kick-off Meeting” of their South Florida NE 79th St north-south traffi c congestion on I-95 running anywhere on this corridor — and NE 71st St East Coast Corridor study. The study, and U.S. 1, but also improve the quality probably many more years than that before NE 61st St launched in 2005, has been examining of life along the corridor. the whole plan is implemented.” NE 54th St the possibility of adding passenger trains The gathering in Miami Shores, one That timeline frustrated Miami to the Florida East Coast Railway. NE 39th St of 11 meetings in the tri-county area over Shores resident John Van Leer, who The railway (known as the FEC) runs NE 29th St the past fi ve weeks, was part of an effort stood up and stated, “I’d really like to along the coast from Miami to Jacksonville, by FDOT to involve the public as they ride on this system before I die.” and then connects to other railroads that NW 19th St move toward deciding things like transit Scott Seeburger, project manager at head north up the Eastern Seaboard. But NW 8th St technologies, routes, station locations, FDOT, noted that securing funding for the southernmost 85-mile stretch, which Government Center and possible connections to Tri-Rail in the project is a major cause of the delay. roughly parallels U.S. 1 from downtown the west. Attendees had an opportunity to Miami (Biscayne Boulevard) to West Palm examine project illustrations, mingle with Continued on page 26 Hidden in Plain View: An Architectural Gem In the heart of North Miami, a nod to Frank Lloyd Wright By Christian Cipriani and 15,000 board feet “We used lots of organic materials and put Special to BT of imported Honduran a huge emphasis on landscaping,” says Wright. mahogany establish a “The Honduran mahogany, for instance, contains f you drive too fast along NE 125th visual weight that far natural preservatives and still looks great today.” Street in North Miami, you may very exceeds the four-story Wright designed the building to host Iwell miss an architectural landmark layout. Dark wood per- the headquarters of Miami millionaire Tom — the Mortgage Corporation of America vades the design — in Ireland’s Mortgage Corporation of America,

Building at 1125 NE 125th, a structure that window frames, doors, BT photos by Christian Cipriani and soon after completion, the structure col- has captured the imagination for nearly 40 interior woodwork, and lected virtually every design and landscape years. The building is again up for sale after overhangs that extend award around. “Tom wanted a building with being purchased in 2007 by Salerno Hold- at least six feet from the real identity,” Wright recalls. “And it gave me ings. Salerno’s principals, Donato and Vito roof of each fl oor. a chance to express architecture as a mixture Carretta, were as interested in the architec- The lines evoke the of art and science. It takes an investor-owner ture as the investment, but after picking it geometric balance of who’s looking way beyond the dollar to up for $4.25 million, they’re now asking Japanese temples and contribute something lasting to the commu- $7 million, though in a tumbling real the cantilevered lines nity. We’ve lost that today — everyone wants estate market. As the Carrettas search for a of that other famous boxes that are all about money.” buyer, the BT caught up with the building’s Wright — Frank Lloyd The stone-and-wood theme is pre- architect, Carson Bennett Wright, for a trip Wright. While there’s no Designed by Carson Bennett Wright, this North served throughout the interior at 1125, down memory lane. relation, Carson Wright Miami landmark evokes the style of a more famous and in most offi ce suites the fi nishes Designed in 1971, the building’s says his namesake Wright — Frank Lloyd. remain intact. Four decades of wear on style remains as arresting as it is tough to forerunner was a huge the brass-and-mahogany front doors classify: Towering, hand-laid walls made infl uence, from prominent horizontals to detail to designing in harmony with the site. Continued on page 26 from 167 tons of Tennessee River boulders, allowing the aesthetic to permeate every It stands as a worthy homage to the master.

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 25 COMMUNITY NEWS

Train to rock and roll to get through Phase 2,” Continued from page 25 Seeburger enthused. “We should have a decision [about the project’s viability] by “The hang-up is that we’re trying to cap- spring of next year.” ture federal money, which eats up a lot of Bob Powers, president of the Upper East- time.” The federal government will fund side’s Palm Grove Neighborhood Association, up to 50 percent of the project, he said, questioned why there were no representatives and FDOT’s protracted studies are neces- from the FEC at the meeting. “I’m furious sary in order to comply with complicated that you can even say to me that it’s going to

federal regulations. With an estimated Archives Photos courtesy Florida State be another six years…. You could put trains project cost of $4 to $10 billion, federal on there tomorrow and people would use money will be essential. them. The next time you do this, I’d really A North Miami resident named Mike Back to the future: FEC’s “Havana The last FEC passenger train like to see a rep from the FEC here to say suggested, “The length of time you’re spend- Special” to Miami, ca. 1930. heads for Miami, July 30, 1968. whether they’re onboard or not.” ing to get federal money is kind of rankling. Is Seeburger responded, “If there’s there anything we can do to push this?” you realize how badly burned people are,” for the FEC project. something that makes a lot of sense and “Talk to your local offi cials,” See- said one Upper Eastside resident. “We paid Approximately 96 proposed station it’s not happening, it’s not because there’s burger said. “If the local community money and expected things, and through locations are currently on the table for a conspiracy, it isn’t because people aren’t really wants it, there’s going to have to corruption we lost everything.” the tri-county region, and so far only the doing their jobs. The fi ght over money is be a sharing of the cost.” In other parts The biggest question of the night, though, Village of Miami Shores has expressed no constant, even in boom times.” of the country where rail systems are in was whether the FEC project would receive interest. “They don’t want a station,” said Overall residents displayed a mix place, he said, citizens have been willing any money from Florida’s $12.2 billion share Ric Katz, an FDOT consultant. “They don’t of impatience and enthusiasm for the to pay for it. So a dedicated source of of President Barack Obama’s economic want noise from horns or any more com- project. The BT’s January cover story, local funding will need to be secured. stimulus plan. “The short answer,” Seeburger motion in their city than they already have, which took an in-depth look at the FEC Mention of local funding rubbed some said, “is no. We won’t have anything ready to and I think we can accommodate that.” railroad and the FDOT study, bore the raw nerves in the room. Miami-Dade go to construction within the time frame that The effects of commuter trains on title “Waiting for the Train.” The gather- implemented a half-cent sales tax back in the stimulus demands.” minority and historic neighborhoods, as ing in Miami Shores clearly showed that 2002 to fund new transportation projects, On a positive note, Seeburger well as on parks, trails, and wetlands Biscayne Corridor residents are not only but nearly half of the $800 million collect- mentioned that he has worked on several along the corridor will also be taken waiting, they’re eager to climb aboard. ed so far has been squandered, and the new large transportation projects and has into consideration in this new, second projects never materialized. “I don’t think never seen the level of support that exists phase of FDOT’s study. “We’re going Feedback: [email protected]

Hidden he walked into the offi ce vision permeated the interior, bring- Continued from page 25 fl ush with $22 million after ing his palette of materials to a selling his company. handmade wine cellar; glass, brass, is evident from the outside, but inside, “I’ll never forget it,” and mahogany double doors; ma- the design’s concentric rectangles Wright recounts. “Paul told hogany planters; and stone fireplaces still catch the light in deep caramel me that he spent his whole — most of which was salvaged before tones. Likewise, swooping, concentric life being an ordinary work- the home’s cumbersome destruction. wooden Vs emanate from angled lamps ing guy, and he wanted this “The demolition company almost went the length of the main hallway, and the house to be extraordinary.” bankrupt trying to take that house elevator retains its intricately carved The result was a down,” says Wright with pride. “It doors. The project remains one of 12,000-square-foot waterfront was all poured concrete and very Wright’s favorites, and holds a special mansion on Arvida Parkway sturdy. The demolition was painful place in his heart. in Gables Estates. Vaughan for me because I put so much passion “My affection for that building is a lived out his retirement in his into designing it. I guess you could very decent, pure love affair,” he says. dream home, passing away say that the house died with Paul.” “It’s actually how I met my wife. My shortly before the next buyer Carson Wright is still a practic- fi rst wife had passed away and I had two razed it in 1993. Like the ing architect, managing partner of small children, and Tom Ireland had a Mortgage Corporation build- the Tampa offi ce of Schwab Twitty & friend who wanted to meet the architect. ing, Vaughan’s house also Hanser, and he’s grateful to still be in She and I were set up on a blind date, and used Honduran mahogany, demand: “I’ve been blessed that I’ve 30 years later we’re still married.” copper, enormous glass been able to do what I love the most — The Mortgage Corporation of Ameri- panels, and six railroad cars design buildings.” ca building was the start of a decade-plus of hand-laid, sand-colored The days of river rocks by the period in which Wright applied his touch river stone. The house was trainload and heavy beams imported to a number of commercial and residen- described by the Miami from tropical jungles may be gone, but tial designs around Miami. In 1972 he Herald as “one-of-a-kind…a Wright’s work has left an indelible im- was hired to design the retirement home mix of jutting angles and sloping planes.” creating a sense that there was no pression on Miami’s architectural land- of chemical engineer Paul Vaughan, who According to Wright, the house separation between the resident and scape, in particular at 1125 NE 125th St. had invented a mechanism that dispenses was designed so that every vantage the bay. As with his work on Tom plastic wrap, and Wright recalls the day point looked down at the water, Ireland’s building, Wright’s design Feedback: [email protected]

26 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 COMMUNITY NEWS

Hagen proliferation of billboards and advertis- Continued from page 26 ing murals, and to the slashing of trees by developers. He’s also been a relentless throwing dollars down a rat hole?” advocate for additional park space. According to Michael Spring, direc- Says Greg Bush: “I gained a great tor of cultural affairs for Miami-Dade deal of respect for him and his research County, two things need to happen before on issues.” the museums can proceed with their proj- Albert Ruder, now a Bay Harbor ects: They have to nail down long-term Islands councilmember, headed Miami’s leases with the City of Miami for the parks department for 14 years. “I think he Bicentennial Park land (the museums are is an outstanding citizen,” Ruder says. “He reportedly negotiating 99-year arrange- is very well informed and does outstanding ments), and they need to raise their share research. Every time he got involved with of the capital. an issue, it was never to benefi t himself but “They have to have enough money for the benefi t of community.” to pay for the entire project,” says Spring, Adds Miami Commissioner Marc who adds that he has been following the Sarnoff, a supporter of Museum Park: “He museums’ fundraising efforts very closely [Hagen] taught me a lot of what I know and only releases bond money to them about parks, how much acreage we need when they document expenditures related for parks and how many we’re lacking.” to their future homes at Bicentennial, or Hagen often points out that the City of Museum Park, as it may one day be called. Miami is dead last in the United States when According to a county manager’s report, it comes to recreational open space. “We MAM has taken in $14.88 million of $45 currently have about 3.4 acres per thousand million pledged by would-be donors, “all residents, or 148 square feet per person,” he of which has been expended on project wrote in an e-mail to the city’s Planning Ad- costs to date.” No new fi nancial updates visory Board. “Yes this number puts Miami have been received by the science museum at the bottom of all medium and high density since last year, when it reported raising cities. If we doubled our space we would still $1.8 million, Spring says. (Offi cials from be last. If we tripled it we would rise just one MAM and the Museum of Science did not slot on the list of cities.” return BT’s calls seeking clarifi cation.) “Great cities have great spaces to Museum Park skeptics, Greg Bush walk around in,” Hagen says, adding that included, doubt the county’s ability to parks not only give locals and tourists a track the funds collected by the museums, place to decompress but also to interact raising the specter of another project with one another. “It’s an opportunity to like the performing arts center, which rub shoulders with someone.” was 20 months late in opening and more When city offi cials opted for the Museum than $100 million over budget. “It really Park idea in 2003, consuming more than a needs to be looked at a lot more,” Bush quarter of Bicentennial’s 29 acres, Hagen says. “They’re getting advances on weighed in as an opponent of the $553 mil- money from the county bond issue. We lion bond issue, which also promised new can’t walk away from that.” libraries and schools. But the measure passed A county commission committee last easily, along with seven other bond issues — month recommended another $8.4 million a grand total of $2.9 billion. disbursement to MAM from the bond “They [museum supporters] basi- money for design costs. However, Com- cally drove the bus afterward,” Bush says. missioner Sally Heyman added language “Park advocates really had no say. Steve, requiring that unspent funds be returned to to his credit, examined the [plans] care- the county in the event the museums are fully. He has held their feet to the fi re.” not built. The allocation has been delayed Hagen continues stoking that fi re, and in order to give all 13 commissioners more overloading countless e-mail inboxes. His time to review the proposal. recent communiqués accuse Miami offi - Hagen, a 15-year resident of Belle cials of being outright lawbreakers, arguing Meade now retired from his business that the Carollo Amendment, spearheaded importing art and goods from Indone- by former mayor Joe Carollo, requires a sia, isn’t just an e-mail crusader on the public referendum prior to major devel- subject of museums in a waterfront park. opment within a public park. “They’re He’s been vociferous in opposition to a violating the law,” Hagen fumes. “There is publicly funded Marlins stadium, to high- supposed to be a vote by the people.” rise projects along the Biscayne Boule- vard and the 79th Street corridors, to the Feedback: [email protected]

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 27 POLICE REPORTS Biscayne Crime Beat Compiled by Derek McCann Boulevard Trinity entered the apartment anyway, uninvited, 100 Block of NE 73rd Street and gathered the audacity to remove a Jalousie windows are an aesthetically 20-dollar bill from a coffee table. Hell pleasing Miami staple, but they are anach- broke loose and an old-fashioned chase through the apartment complex ensued. ronisms too. A church was closed up by With the assistance of a neighbor, the a member one evening. All doors were starving woman was tackled just as she locked and all windows secured. Some- began to climb a 12-foot fence. Police ar- one still managed to enter the church and rived and found the offending woman on stole several items. The thief gained entry the ground and the victim yelling, “Give through the back jalousie windows — the me my money!” The defendant offered a same windows that had been manipu- feeble excuse and returned the bill. Police lated several months earlier (and featured then arrested her. This “charity” incident, in “Crime Beat”) when another burglary Biscayne Corridor residents should know, occurred at this church. Miami denizens occurred in at least six different forms in are warned to lose the jalousies or risk this month’s reports. becoming a future item in this monthly crime report. This church, it appears, may On the Trail of Another be going for the trifecta. from view for three minutes. During The Limits of Charity Criminal Genius those three minutes, a mystery man Omni 700 Block of NE 64th Street crawled on the fl oor — to avoid detec- A Good Samaritan saw a seemingly Victim legally evicted her boyfriend Snake of a Man Strikes Hard tion — and opened the cash register with hungry woman and offered to feed her. one week earlier and had taken his key. Upper Eastside his right hand, stealing $300. He then She brought the poor woman to her apart- On this night, he did not need a key. ment and told her to stay outside as she A female cashier needed to use the bath- crawled out the door. There is video of He kicked in the bathroom window room, so she left her station, which she this slithering scrounger, but at press prepared something for her to eat. The famished female gained some spunk and thought she had locked, and disappeared time no arrests have been made. Continued on page 31

28 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 POLICE REPORTS

Crime Beat Reefer Madness I Want Your Sex, but I’ll A Hirsute Case of He Said, Continued from page 30 Menaces Miami Settle for Your Watch She Said (which was locked) and entered the 200 Block of NE 20th Street Club Space 600 Block of NE 36th Street apartment, ransacking and vandal- Victim arranged for sex on a chat line and Victim was outside the club, eating a Victim claims her ex-boyfriend from two izing it, while stealing several items, met the subject at her home, in the vestibule. hotdog, when a nymphomaniac of a years ago attacked her after she opened including a plasma television. But this Apparently the agreement was marijuana for woman walked up to him. She aggres- her door. He pulled her hair and said, “I’m dolt left his wallet at the scene! He sex. (Weed whore?) While they engaged in sively began grabbing his body in places going to kill you.” She fought him off. was later arrested at a local pawnshop Clintonian sexual relations, the woman asked the man found none too comfortable. However, the alleged perpetrator’s story is trying to hawk that plasma television. for actual intercourse, which the victim (?) (He was just not that into her.) He pushed that she attacked him, ripping out a hunk of refused. At this time the victim was pushed her away, but as he did he felt her hand his chest hair and threatening to kill him. Travails of a out the door and locked out of the home, sans on his wrist. Shaken by the sexual high Hair samples from both were found at the marijuana. When police arrived, the subject jinks, he did not notice she was stealing scene, lending credence to both versions. Walgreens Shopper refused to interrupt her green day, and did his watch. Efforts to locate the wanton In what may have been a toss of the coin, 3103 Biscayne Blvd. not answer the door. NORML would need to coquette were not successful. police arrested the man. Shopping at Walgreens in Miami can sort this one out. be a frustrating experience owing to the heavy volume of customers, but at After Two Years, Time to the very least you can remain some- Felony Dumb Secure All Sticky File that Police Report what autonomous by using your own Morningside Park Substances 200 Block of NE 82nd Terrace shopping cart. This victim took that to On a beautiful Miami day, a woman 5900 Block of Biscayne Boulevard A woman had applied for a job at a record heart, placing his briefcase in his cart. decided to spend some quality time at the Opportunists will steal just about store and had given her passport to the While shopping, he briefl y walked park. She impulsively decided she wanted anything. This victim had his annual manager as proof of identity. Two years away from the cart (typical Boulevard a little exercise, so she went for a run. She vehicle-registration decal stolen from passed and the passport was not returned. victim behavior), only to return and placed her purse on a park bench, left it un- his car’s license plate. It was meticu- (“Crime Beat” is unsure if she ever asked fi nd the cart and briefcase gone. There attended, and then did her little jog. When lously peeled off by the perpetrator and for it back.) Victim fi led a report because are no leads save for a fuzzy image of she returned, the purse, of course, was probably sold on the decal black market she now “believes it was stolen.” For police, a man casually striding away with the missing. Miami’s Finest still answered the for crack. There is no foolproof way to this was a cold case from the fi rst day. goods. Miami’s true credo: “Here one call. Next time, she might want to spend secure such a decal, so just pray this second, gone the next.” that beautiful day on her couch. does not happen to you. Feedback: [email protected] AUTO

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 29 A RT & CULTURE The Book As Artwork What happens when artists create books? We’ll soon fi nd out By Victor Barrenechea space where people can do what they BT Contributor want to do.” The fi rst book, WWW by artist new medium will soon be avail- Daniel Newman, should be out in May. A able to select Miami artists: the longtime underground Miami mainstay, A printed page. At least it will Newman uses a wide array of media, from be if [NAME] Publications has its way. painting to sculpture to video, and now The publishing house intends to release books. The multi-tasking artist, who is four books this year, each showcasing a busy with an upcoming solo exhibition single Miami artist, giving him or her in Los Angeles as well as the [NAME] the opportunity to branch out into new project, reveals that his will be a book modes of expression. about the Internet. The original idea was to [NAME] is the brainchild of artist/ create a reference volume that would cata- writer Gean Moreno, a winner of the logue oddities found on the World Wide James L. Knight Foundation’s Knight Web, but it has morphed into a massive un- Arts Challenge. His is just one of the dertaking that hopes to convey a snapshot many community arts projects made of this moment in our digital age. possible by grants from the Knight “There’s a book that made an im- Foundation — in Moreno’s case, $30,000, pression on me that I came across re- a sum that must be matched by another cently,” says Newman. “It’s titled The funding source. Moreno is confi dent Complete Compendium of Universal the grant money will be matched, and Knowledge.” Published in 1895, it was he plans to expand his project over the written by William Ralston Balch, who next fi ve years to include a total of 20 sought to compile all knowledge of the books, each created by a Miami artist. Online image from Daniel Newman’s WWW. universe into one digestible read, a feat Artists chosen for this year include the Internet has come much closer to Daniel Newman, Beatriz Monteavaro, making the distinction between creat- which to work. Moreno’s only job is to achieving. and Clifton Childree, as well as William ing and writing,” he says, hinting at the choose who gets to release a book. From Newman describes WWW as the Cordova and the BASE collective. line-blurring, media-hopping approach there it’s up to the artists. Compendium’s “red-headed stepchild.” Moreno ([email protected]) that will inform [NAME]. But Moreno For instance, if someone wants to In an effort to model itself on The Com- has been a fi xture on the local art scene does not plan to publish his own work glue all the pages together and release plete Compendium, Newman’s WWW since the late 1990s, known for creating as part of this endeavor, nor does he it that way, so be it. The cover designs will include text and images, most lifted art that has been exhibited internationally. expect mere artist monographs. As he will be as minimal and unobtrusive as directly from the Web, that highlight He’s also known for his extensive writing puts it: “I think of it almost as a design possible, including edition number, the curious items, strange stories, hoaxes, on the arts. In addition, he’s had a hand in project, where you create a system and [NAME] logo, and the artist’s own name. and other forms of Web misinformation, curating numerous shows, and for years you let people do whatever they want. The rest will be left to the bookmaker’s presented in a stream-of-consciousness was closely associated with exhibits at the Inside these structures, there’s kind of imagination. Even within that broad manner designed to mirror the mechan- alternative art space Locust Projects. no restrictions.” framework, things are negotiable, ac- ics of the Internet itself. “I’ve always done curatorial and The only restrictions for each book cording to Moreno. “If an artist comes Newman may be no stranger to organizational things,” says Moreno, will be a page count of 80 to 100, and up with this great way to undermine the producing work in written form (he has and for him [NAME] is just an exten- dimensions of six-by-nine inches. Artists design, that would be fantastic too,” he sion of that. “A long time ago I stopped essentially will have a blank slate upon says. “The whole idea is to have this Continued on page 31

30 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 A RT & CULTURE

Book noisemaker. Each succeeding artist would Continued from page 30 create his own sound segment after listening created a handful of small-circulation to a ten-second sample of the preceding artist’s zines, manifestos, even a book of poetry), work. A CD would be included with the book but he freely admits that the [NAME] to accompany Childree’s illustrations. project is taking him outside his comfort With a going price of $15, and print zone. “This is a different situation for sure,” runs of 1000 each, each [NAME] book will he acknowledges. “The book opened a have a chance of reaching larger audiences number of doors for other ideas, too.” than a single painting or sculpture displayed The book as artwork appears to be a temporarily in a gallery. Newman believes novel concept for Miami. Even Moreno the books will provide “the opportunity for admits he’s never seen anything quite like some really great artists from the swamp to his project here. “But it’s also in the spirit of reach out beyond. Books are eternal. They a lot of things that have happened in Miami,” carry a life of their own.” he adds, citing some of Miami’s laissez-faire Many art-related books, printed in very alternative spaces such the Bas Fisher Invita- limited numbers and priced exorbitantly, never tional and Locust Projects. Both these spaces circulate outside of elite circles. “I didn’t want to have given artists the freedom to experiment Clifton Childree: For his book, he’s Gean Moreno sees [NAME] as a make them like art books, like a 75 run,” says and produce work that would probably never planning an audio component design project. Moreno. “I want them to be out in the world.” be accepted in more commercial galleries. from local noise artists. Imagine stumbling across a wildly For example, last summer fi lmmak- and I thought that would be interesting,” eccentric book like WWW at some random er Clifton Childree was offered free abandoned amusement park, with his Moreno explains. bookstore, having never heard of Daniel run of the Locust space and given two fi lms interspersed throughout. He says Childree’s project is still in the planning Newman. Moreno delights in such a months to create whatever he wanted. he’s fi nding similar creative freedom stages, but he does say he’s been thinking about scenario: “I think it’s pretty amazing if He ended up with an installation called while working on his upcoming book, surrealist Max Ernst, and imagines a multime- someone buys it because it’s in the culture Dream-Cum-Tru, in which he trans- tentatively titled Black Licorice. dia book that would use two-minute snippets of — if it negotiates a place in the culture.” formed the space into a meticulously “With Clifton, I kind of didn’t know noise, created by noise-music artists assembled detailed replica (in miniature) of an what a Clifton book would look like, by Childree and Rat Bastard, a veteran Miami Feedback: [email protected] HOME SERVICES

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 31 ART & CULTURE ART LISTINGS

WYNWOOD GALLERY WALK & DESIGN DISTRICT 786-597-8467 GALLERY DIET ART + DESIGN NIGHT Through March 30: 174 NW 23rd St., Miami SATURDAY, MARCH 14 “Last Works of Maximo 305-571-2288 Caminero and Sergio Garcia” www.gallerydiet.com 101/EXHIBIT with Maximo Caminero and Through March 7: 101 NE 40th St., Miami Sergio Garcia “The Best of Intentions” by Daniel Milewski 305-573-2101; www.101exhibit.com March 14 through April 4: Call gallery for exhibition information. CAROL JAZZAR “The Benjamin Project” by The Benjamin Project CONTEMPORARY ART Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. ABBA FINE ART 158 NW 91st St. 233 NW 36th St., Miami Miami Shores GARY NADER FINE ART 305-576-4278 62 NE 27th St., Miami 305-490-6906 www.abbafi neart.com 305-576-0256 www.cjazzart.com Through March 11: www.garynader.com By appointment: carol “Forces of Nature” by Suzan Woodruff Call gallery for exhibition information. Through March 14: March 14 through May 5: “Zoe” by Debra Holt “OTHERWORLD” by Guerra HARDCORE ARTS CONTEMPORARY SPACE Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. de la Paz 3326 N. Miami Ave., Miami March 20 through April 12: 305-576-1645 ALEJANDRA VON HARTZ FINE ARTS “Deepen / Deeper” by Asser www.hardcoreartcontemporary.com 2134 NW Miami Ct., Miami Saint Val Shay Kun, Never regret anything because at one time Through March 7: 305-438-0220 Reception March 20, 7 to it was exactly what you wanted, oil on canvas, 2008, “Daily Scenes” by Ignacio Goitia, “La Ventana Indiscreta www.alejandravonhartz.net 10 p.m. VI” by Alexis Perez Montero, and a group show with Through March 29: at David Castillo Gallery. various artists from Valencia “Everything Is Borrowed” by Jaime Gili CENTER FOR VISUAL March 14 through April 4: Though March 25: “Juxtaposition” with Hubert Neal Jr., COMMUNICATION “Squared In/Squared Out” with Pepe Lopez, Pancho Francesca Lalanne, and Adrienne Chadwick AMAYA GALLERY 541 NW 27th St., Miami Quillici, Claudia Bueno, Gladys Triana, Comba, 2033 NW 1st Pl., Miami 305-571-1415 Richard Garet, and Rodolfo Agrela DORSCH GALLERY 917-743-2925 www.visual.org “From where, what, who“ by Henry Bermudez 151 NW 24th St., Miami www.amayagallery.com “it tastes like chicken” by Julie Lopez Call gallery for exhibition information. 305-576-1278 Call gallery for exhibition information. “RE-CYCLED” by Andres Michelena www.dorschgallery.com Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. CHAREST-WEINBERG GALLERY March 14 through April 4: ART FUSION 250 NW 23rd St., Miami “Celluloid Drag: some spaces between fi lm and 1 NE 40th St., Miami HAROLD GOLEN GALLERY 305-292-0411 architecture” curated by Terri C. Smith with Gordon 305-573-5730 Temporary location: www.charest-weinberg.com Matta-Clark, Todd McDaniel, and Ralph Provisero www.artfusiongallery.com 314 NW 24th St., Miami Through April 4: Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. Through March 25: “New Sculture” by Larry Estridge 305-576-1880 “Exploration of the Spirit” with various artists www.haroldgolengallery.com March 14: DOT FIFTYONE ART SPACE Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. Call gallery for exhibition information. Exhibition featuring the work of DASH students 51 NW 36th St., Miami Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. ART GALLERY AT GOVERNMENT CENTER 305-573-9994 JULIO BLANCO STUDIO 111 NW 1st St., Suite 625, Miami www.dotfi ftyone.com 164 NW 20th St., Miami 305-375-4634 CHELSEA GALLERIA Through March 30: 305-534-5737 www.miamidadearts.org 2441 NW 2nd Ave., Miami “Bazaar” by Pancho Luna www.onemansho.com Through April 2: “Adopt a Masterpiece: Selections from 305-576-2950 Through March 30: the Miami-Dade Art in Public Places Artbank Collection” www.chelseagalleria.com EDGAR ACE GALLERY “Abstractions” by Julio Blanco with Carlos Alfonso, José Bedia, Cundo Bermudez, Through March 10: 7520 NE 4th Ct., Miami Keith Haring, Wifredo Lam, and Ed Ruscha “Walking on Air” by Garie Waltzer 305-877-2401 KELLEY ROY GALLERY March 21 through April 4: 50 NE 29 St., Miami ART ROUGE DAMIEN B. CONTEMPORARY ART CENTER “Fly Away” by Bernardo Medina-Colón 305-447-3888 46 NW 36th St., Miami 282 NW 36th St., Miami Reception March 21, 8 to 11 p.m. www.kelleyroygallery.com 305-448-2060 305-573-4949 March 7 through April 25: www.artrouge.com www.damienb.com EDGE ZONES CONTEMPORARY ART “Waters” by Antonio Ugarte and “Rhyme Art” Through March 11: “Art of Deception: abstract and March 14 through April 10: 47 NE 25th St., Miami by Mike Tesch ethnic sculptures and paintings” with Terence Carr, Dee “Sentinels” by Narbero 305-303-8852 Reception March 7, 7 to 10 a.m. Sands, and John LaHuis Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. www.edgezones.org March 14 through March 30: KEVIN BRUK GALLERY ARTFORMZ DAVID CASTILLO GALLERY “Everything Must Go” by Mideo M. Cruz and “Ten 2249 NW 1st Pl., Miami 171 NW 23rd St., Miami 2234 NW 2nd Ave., Miami Selves” by J. Valdia 305-576-2000 305-572-0040 305-573-8110 Reception March 14, 8 to 11 p.m. www.kevinbrukgallery.com www.artformz.net Through April 8: Through March 9: “Faith, Fear, and Fortune” with PJ www.castilloart.com Through March 7: ELITE ART EDITIONS GALLERY “PAINTHINGS” curated by Sam Gordon Mills and Ramon Williams with Lecia Dole-Recio, Jake Ewert, and “Pinched” by Tom Scicluna and “Calor” 151 NW 36th St., Miami 305-403-5856 Jacob Robihcaux BAKEHOUSE ART COMPLEX by Guido Albi-Marini www.elitearteditions.com “48 Hours in Miami” by Sam Gordon 561 NW 32nd St., Miami March 14 through April 4: “Fight or Flight” by George Sanchez-Calderon and Call gallery for exhibition information. 305-576-2828; www.bacfl .org KUNSTHAUS MIAMI March 13 through April 1: “Opportunities Multiply As They Are Seized” by Shay Kun ETRA FINE ART 3312 N. Miami Ave., Miami “Collective Consciousness” with Jennifer Basile, Ingrid Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. 305-438-1333 Eliasson, Patricia Gutierrez, Tina Salvesen, and José 10 NE 40th St., Miami 305-438-4383 www.kunsthaus.org.mx Pacheco Silva DIANA LOWENSTEIN FINE ARTS www.etrafi neart.com Call gallery for exhibition information. Reception March 13, 7 to 10 p.m. 2043 N. Miami Ave., Miami Call gallery for exhibition information. 305-576-1804 LEITER GALLERY BARBARA GILLMAN GALLERY www.dlfi nearts.com FACHE ARTS 6900 Biscayne Blvd., Miami 4141 NE 2nd Ave. #202, Miami Through March 7: 305-389-2616 750 NE 124thSt., North Miami Suite 2 305-573-1920 “Pigment Coast” by Dario Basso Call gallery for exhibition information. 305-975-6933 www.artnet.com/bgillman.html March 14 though April 4: Call gallery for exhibition information. www.fachearts.com “Inanimate Survey of Male Potential” by LOCUST PROJECTS Call gallery for exhibition information. Luis M. Alonzo-Barkigia and “Diagrams for a 105 NW 23rd St., Miami BERNICE STEINBAUM GALLERY 305-576-8570 Seismic Bioscape” by Julie Davidow FREDRIC SNITZER GALLERY 3550 N. Miami Ave., Miami www.locustprojects.org Reception March 14, 7:30 to 10 p.m. 2247 NW 1st Pl., Miami 305-573-2700 March 14 through April 26: 305-448-8976 www.bernicesteinbaumgallery.com “transvirtual perspectives in a semi-tropical Through March 7: “Voom Portraits” by Robert Wilson DIASPORA VIBE GALLERY www.snitzer.com 3938 NE 39th St., Miami environment” by Bartow + Metzgar March 14 through April 4: Reception March 14, 7 to 11 p.m. CAMINERO ART STUDIO 305-573-4046 “Sculpture Without A Skin” by Yasue Maetake 598 NE 77th St., Miami www.diasporavibe.net Reception March 14, 7 to 9 p.m. Continued on page 33

32 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 ART & CULTURE

Art Listings MIAMI INTERNATIONAL UNIVERSITY PUZZLEMENT GALLERY OF ART AND DESIGN 81 NW 24th St., Miami Continued from page 32 1501 Biscayne Blvd., Miami 917-929-8559; www.puzzlementart.com 305-428-5700 Ongoing show with Kevin Brady, Manuel Carbonell, Nichole Chimenti, Carter Davis, Stephen Gamson, www.mymiu.com LUIS ADELANTADO GALLERY Raquel Glottman, Jim Herbert, Jennifer Kaiser, Alex Through March 15: 98 NW 29th St., Miami Paiva Lopez, Andy Piedilato, Tomy F. Trujillo, Jonathan 305-438-0069 “A Celebration of Life - Luciano Franchi de Alfaro III,” a “Depoe” Villoch, and Giancarlo Zavala www.luisadelantadomiami.com Luciano Franchi memorial retrospective March 14 through May 15: SPINELLO GALLERY “Homeless Boy” by Darío Villalba and a solo show by MUSEO VAULT 531 NE 82nd Terr., Miami Marta María Pérez Bravo 346 NW 29th St., Miami 786-271-4223 Reception March 14, 7 to 10 p.m. 305-571-1175. www.spinellogallery.com www.museovault.com Through March 31: LYLE O. REITZEL GALLERY Through March 7: “I WANT TYPOE SO EFFIN BAD” by TYPOE 2441 NW 2nd Ave., Miami “Construction” by Barbara Frank 305-573-1333 STASH GALLERY www.artnet.com/reitzel.html March 14 through April 15: 162 NE 50 Terr., Miami. Call gallery for exhibition information. “Non-Stop, Retrospective from the glamorous 80s” 305-992-7652 by Sheila Elias www.myspace.com/stashgallery MARIO FLORES GALLERY Reception March 14, 6 to 10 p.m. Call gallery for exhibition information. 12502 NE 8th Ave., North Miami Asser Saint Val, Stumpt. W.E. 561-201-2053 OUR HOUSE WEST OF WYNWOOD STEVE MARTIN STUDIO www.mariofl oresgallery.com (1988). The endicrinology 3100 NW 7th Ave., Miami 66 NE 40th St., Miami Through March 20: of sunlight and darkness: 305-490-2976 305-484-1491; www.stevemartinfi neart.com “RED AND GRAY” with Mario Flores and Freddy Osorio Call gallery for exhibition information. March 27 through April 20: complimentary roles of vitamin www.oh-wow.com “GARAGE SALE” by Igor Montoya-Laske D and peneal hormones. Call gallery for exhibition information. TWENTY TWENTY PROJECTS Reception March 27, 6:30 to 11 p.m. Naturwissenschaftern, 75, 247-251, 2020 NW Miami Ct., Miami PANAMERICAN ART PROJECTS 786-217-7683 MIAMI ART GROUP GALLERY mixed media on masonite, 2008, at 2450 NW 2nd Ave., Miami www.twentytwentyprojects.com 126 NE 40th St., Miami 305-573-2400 Call gallery for exhibition information. 305-576-2633 Carol Jazzar. www.panamericanart.com www.miamiartgroup.com March 7 through April 4: UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI PROJECTS SPACE March 1 through June 1 2200 NW 2nd Ave., Miami Kcho and Cuban Collective “Wake Up Your Walls!” with James Kitchens, Jeff Through March 27: 305-284-2542 Reception March 14, 6 to 9 p.m. League, Tom Rossetti, Gail Taylor, Shawn McNulty, “Cars of Cuba” by H. Allen Benowitz Through March 7: Hessam, Goli Mahallati, and Gregory Deane “The Open City” by Karla Turcios Reception March 14, 8 to 10 p.m. MIAM-DADE COLLEGE, CENTER GALLERY PRAXIS INTERNATIONAL ART March 14 through April1: 300 NE 2nd Ave., 2219 NW 2nd Ave., Miami Tutua Boshell and Lisa Kaplowitz MIAMI ART SPACE Bldg. 1, Room 1365, Miami 305-573-2900 Reception March 14, 6 to 10 p.m. 305-237-3696 244 NW 35th St., Miami www.praxis-art.com www.mdc.edu 305-438-9002 Call gallery for exhibition information. www.miamiartspace.com Call gallery for exhibition information. Continued on page 34

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 33 ART & CULTURE

Art Listings “Aesthetics and Values Exhibition 2009” with McKee, David Reinfurt, and Steve Rushton), Lisi Ray Azcuy, Brian Burkhardt, Cooper, Julie Raskin, Julika Rudelius, and Mungo Thomson Continued from page 33 Davidow, Edouard Duval Carrié, Jacek Kolasinski, Mark Koven, Ralph Provisero, THE MARGULIES COLLECTION Sara Stites, and Ruben Torres-Llorca 591 NW 27th St., Miami UNTITLED 2144 305-576-1051 2144 NE 2nd Ave., Miami www.margulieswarehouse.com 305-576-2112 LOWE ART MUSEUM, UNIVERSITY OF Through April 25: www.untitled2144.com MIAMI “Hurma” by Magdalena Abakanowicz, “Western Union: Call gallery for exhibition information. 1301 Stanford Dr., Coral Gables Small Boats” by Isaac Julien, “Oil Rich Niger Delta” by 305-284-3535 George Osodi, and “Photography and Sculpture: A WALLFLOWER GALLERY www.lowemuseum.org Correlated Exhibition” with various artists 10 NE 3rd St., Miami Through April 5: 305-579-0069 “Los Artes de Mexico” with various artists THE RUBELL FAMILY COLLECTION www.wallfl owergallery.com 95 NW 29th St., Miami myspace.com/wallfl owergallery 305-573-6090 MIAMI ART MUSEUM Call gallery for exhibition information. www.rubellfamilycollection.com 101 W. Flagler St., Miami Call for operating hours and exhibit information. 305-375-3000 WHITE VINYL SPACE Through May 30: 3322 NW 2nd Ave., Miami www.miamiartmuseum.org “30 AMERICANS” with Nina Chanel Abney, John 305-776-1515 Through May 24: Bankston, Jean-Michel Basquiat, Mark Bradford, Iona www.whitevinylspace.com “NeoHooDoo: Art for a Forgotten Faith” with Rozeal Brown, Nick Cave, Robert Colescott, Noah Call gallery for exhibition information. various artists Davis, Leonardo Drew, Renée Green, David Hammons, March 13 through October 11: MUSEUM & COLLECTION EXHIBITS Barkley L. Hendricks, Rashid Johnson, Glenn Ligon, “Recent Acquisitions” with various artists Kalup Linzy, Kerry James Marshall, Rodney McMillian, CIFO (Cisneros Fontanals Art Foundation) Wangechi Mutu, William Pope.L, Gary Simmons, 1018 N. Miami Ave., Miami MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART Xaviera Simmons, Lorna Simpson, Shinique Smith, 305-455-3380 770 NE 125th St., North Miami Jeff Sonhouse, Henry Taylor, Hank Willis Thomas, www.cifo.org 305-893-6211 Mickalene Thomas, Kara Walker, Carrie Mae Weems, Call gallery for exhibition information. www.mocanomi.org Kehinde Wiley, and Purvis Young March 25 through May 10: FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL UNIVERSITY FROST “Abstract Cinema” with various artists WORLD CLASS BOXING ART MUSEUM Debra and Dennis Scholl Collection 170 NW 23rd St., Miami 11200 SW 8th St., Miami MOCA AT GOLDMAN WAREHOUSE 305-348-0496 305-438-9908; www.worldclassboxing.org/ 404 NW 26th St., Miami Through March 3: “Works Folding Out Of And In To http://thefrost.fi u.edu/ José Valdivia, Self , photography, 2009, at 305-893-6211 The Collection Of“ by Alice Channer and “2ndLight“ by Through March 9: “Drawing in Space: The Peninsula Edge Zones. www.mocanomi.org Paul Chan Project Illustrated” by John Henry Through March 21: Fontaine, K48, Chris Kraus, Cristina Lei Rodriguez, Through April 4: “Simulacra and Essence: The “The Possibility of an Island” with Cory Arcangel, Davide Nicolas Lobo, Martin Oppel, Philip (a novel written by Paintings of Luisa Basnuevo” by Luisa Maria Basnuevo Compiled by Victor Barrenechea Balula, Tobias Bernstrup, Heman Chong, Peter Coffi n, Mark Aerial Waller, Heman Chong, Cosmin Costinas, Send listings, jpeg images, and events information to March 16 through April 10: Matias Faldbakken, Cao Fei, Kim Fisher, Claire Rosemary Heather, Leif Magne Tangen, Francis [email protected]

34 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 ART & CULTURE Culture Briefs the wind on light-as-air constructions notable South Florida writers read their more than 100 rare orchids open for bid- of stick and paper. Take the kids outside stories of travel on Thursday, March 12, ding at the McDonald Center in North for some fresh air and let the winds at Bagua (4736 NE 2nd Ave.) as part of Miami Beach (17051 NE 19th St.). Doors of the Atlantic carry their kites and the Florida Center for the Literary Arts’ open at 6:30 p.m., and bidding begins imaginations to the heavens at the 16th Write Out Loud series. The speakers at 7:00 p.m. Admission is free. Bidders Annual Kite Day on Sunday, March 8, will be Tom Swick, travel editor at the must pay with cash or checks. Free park- from noon until 5:00 p.m. at Haulover Sun-Sentinel for 19 years, who writes ing behind the center, on NE 171st Street. Park (10800 Collins Ave.) There will and talks about living in Alsace, Greece, For more information contact Amy at be activities for kite-lovers of all ages, and Poland; Fabiola Santiago, an arts 305-788-0484. including competitions, kite-making and culture writer for the Miami Herald, Miami Time Machine classes, and the promise of candy falling who’ll discuss her travels from Cuba to Your chances of getting past the front Jazz Cool and Uncool from high-fl ying piñata kites. Kite Day Paris; and former Herald columnist and Depending on door of any of the stately manses in is free. Participants can bring their own Pulitzer Prize-winner Liz Balmaseda, Morningside have probably been, until whom you talked kites or buy them on site. Call the park who will share stories from the news- to in 1970, iconic now, slim to none. The bayfront neigh- offi ce (305-947-3525) or Skyward Kites worthy foreign fronts she has covered. borhood has become something of an jazz trumpeter (305-893-0906). The readings, free and open to the public, Miles Davis’s exclusive preserve since James Nun- start at 7:30 p.m. nally, owner of a string of candy stores, controversial conceived of the tract in 1926. But on album Bitches Sunday, March 1, the Morningside Brew was either Civic Association throws the doors open a revolutionary during this annual tour. “None of these step forward 1920s and 1930s historically signifi - in American cant gems has ever been on the home music or an unwelcome descent into tour before,” says association president the dark side. Davis’s use of electric William Hopper. Tickets are $12 in instruments and rock rhythms had jazz advance at www.MorningsideTour.com purists frothing at the mouth, though in (through February 28), or $15 on the day retrospect those who saw the genius of of the tour. For more information call Joe the Restaurant Critic the music now seem closer to the truth. Two central players on the album, Chick 305-754-1020. Hosted by celebrity chef and Upper Corea and John McLaughlin, appear at Eastside homegrrrl Michelle Bernstein, Get Spammed Friday Night the Arsht Center as part of its Jazz Roots WPBT-2’s restaurant-review show Check, in the Park — for Free! New Work on the Edge series on Friday, March 27, at 8:00 Please! South Florida begins its second Once again it’s time for downtown offi ce For years the Miami Light Project has p.m. Pianist Corea, a 15-time Grammy season on March 9. Airing on Mondays workers to chill out to some excellent commissioned new work from Miami’s winner, is renowned for his expansion and Thursdays at 7:30 p.m., the show is music in a great setting on a Friday most adventurous emerging artists as of the fusion style. McLaughlin shot to a sort of on-the-air Zagat’s Guide, with evening — for free, thanks to the Down- part of it’s annual “Here & Now” festival. fame in the 1970s with his band Mahav- each episode highlighting three local res- town Development Authority. On March This year’s festival features three new ishnu Orchestra, which blended eclectic taurants chosen by diners from all walks 13 at 5:30 p.m., DJ Le Spam and the performance works. With subjects that jazz with Eastern infl uences. The two of life. Restaurants can be anywhere Spam Allstars take the stage at Bayfront range from bees to underwater dreams will join three artists who are stars in from the Keys to Palm Beach. While this Park’s Tina Hills Pavilion (south end and airborne illusions, the new pieces their own right: saxophonist Kenny season’s are still top secret, a number of of the park). Led by maestro Andrew premiere at the Arsht Center March 5-7. Garrett, bassist Christian McBride, and last year’s picks were from BT terri- Yeomanson, the Spam Allstars have Elizabeth Doud and Jennylin Duany’s drummer Brian Blade. Tickets are $25- tory, including River Oyster Bar, Hiro’s invented an infectious, only-in-Miami Sipping Fury from a Teacup explores $145 at www.arshtcenter.org. the mysteries of apiary “colony collapse Yakko-San, and Uva 69. After dining musical form that blends Latin, funk, disorder.” Alexey Puig Taran takes on anonymously, the amateur reviewers dance, electronica, jazz, hip hop, and the challenges of aerial dance in Symbol. discuss the selected venue’s pros and more. So spread a blanket on the lawn, MiMo Tastes Good Rosie Herrera goes submarine in Various cons. Fun fact: In Chicago, where Check, gaze up at the glittering skyscrapers, and The MiMo Historic District on Saturday, Stages of Drowning: A Cabaret. Perfor- Please! originated, one “reviewer” was unwind with your offi ce pals. March 28, offers tasty gourmet treats as mances begin at 7:30 p.m. in the center’s a relatively unknown local politician part of Taste of MiMo. Boulevard restau- Studio Theater (1300 Biscayne Blvd.). named Barack Obama. Obama’s episode Bids on Buds by Flower rants deliver samples straight to you be- Tickets are $20. Call 305-949-6722 or never aired because the future president tween noon and 5:00 p.m. Small dishes Fanatics ranging in price from $2 to $5 will be visit www.arshtcenter.org. was “too thoughtful, too articulate, not Orchids are the gemstones of the plant enough an amateur.” available at, among other places, Le Café, world — the largest family of fl owering Ver Daddy’s, Moonchine, Moshi Moshi, Go Fly a Piñata! plants, with each prized species claim- Let Them Do the Trekking Che Soprano’s, Wine 69, Casa Toscana, Flying kites dates back 3000 years, to ing its own mix of exotic color and form. Kingdom, Anise Taverna, Uva 69, and Too broke to afford a vacation? Well, the Chinese and their slinky, dragon- Orchid afi cionados will have a bonanza Red Light. For details call 305-609-4288 you can always let your imagination do shaped aerial artworks. Since then at the Exotic Orchid Auction on Monday, or visit www.mimoboulevard.org. millions have experienced the joys of the hiking and biking. It’s free and you March 23, sponsored by the North Dade holding a string and feeling the tug of don’t have to go through customs. Three Orchid Club. The event will feature Feedback: [email protected]

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 35 PARK PATROL When Is a Park Not a Park? When it’s actually part of a college campus — thank goodness By Jim W. Harper black vultures, and a single white BT Contributor heron refl ected in the water. Take a few moments to search for the he best park in town is really smaller, less obvious creatures along the not a park at all. Despite that, it shoreline: the hermit crabs, land crabs, Thas miles of jogging trails with and snails in the rocks. But be prepared million-dollar views of Biscayne Bay. for some disappointment, too. The rocks There are actual forests of pines and Harper BT photos by Jim W. are covered with washed-up litter. mangroves, and it offers some of the Most of the area near the bay is clean, best kayaking and bird-watching around. wide open, rocky, and weedy. There is Manatees and dolphins are regulars. not a lot of shade. For some reason, I It may sound like mammoth Oleta never see people fl ying kites, but I have State Park, but it is actually Oleta’s seen a model airplane or two. conjoined twin. Together they offer one This eastern stretch of the FIU of South Florida’s largest patches of campus is so wide open that people green east of I-95. Both are on state land. actually say hello to each other when However, only one of them is free. The walking by. Call it a Miami miracle! Try secret is now out: The best park in town it, you’ll like it. is the Biscayne Bay campus of Florida Unlike at Oleta State Park or the nearby International University. spoil islands, fi shing and dipping in the water The eastern half of FIU’s 200-acre is not permitted, although it is possible to property is more like a park than a kayak for miles. Check out the southwestern campus because it houses no buildings Manatee Beach, perfect for pets, kayaks, and wild things. corner to experience an impenetrable man- and remains in a mostly natural state. It is possible to explore the area for hours into the forest. Two footbridges cross nighttime use, and without coming across anything re- over idyllic canals of dark, brackish there is no security. motely academic. And the best way to water that refl ect the silhouettes above. But in the daylight, experience the campus’s better, greener This former access road at the it is our private little half is from the back-door entrance. terminus of 135th Street is unmarked slice of paradise. A new bike trail leads you down and inaccessible to cars, which makes Connecting to 135th Street — North Miami’s version it perfect for the many bike-riders, jog- the access road, the of the Champs-Élysées — and brings gers, and dog-walkers who visit daily. improved trail loops you to nature’s version of the Arc de You can hardly miss it, as the street around the entire Triomphe. Giant Australian pines create loops around right where it begins. The campus for nearly an arch above the newly marked pathway lack of lighting makes it too spooky for four miles, but the section along the bay is by far the best FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL UNIVERSITY place to spend your time. At one point, Park Rating the mangroves have been cleared and the view opens up to Wide-open spaces like this are rare in Miami. a circular thumb of 3000 NE 151st St. Biscayne Bay that is dotted with glis- grove forest, broken up only by a few canals. North Miami tening white yachts. I call it Manatee Here is another remarkable ele- 305-919-5500 Beach, and it is one of my favorite ment: 13 acres of waterfront that will Hours: Sunrise spots in Miami. I bring my dogs here never be developed. In 2007 the City of Bike Trail to sunset to take a dip, though people are not North Miami preserved its piece along- End of 135th St.St. Picnic tables: No allowed to swim. side the FIU pie by creating the Arch Barbecues: No On one of my fi rst visits to this Creek East Environmental Preserve in Picnic pavilions: No shore of large pebbles, I saw a huge perpetuity. North Miami Councilman Tennis courts: Yes manatee in shallow water resting Scott Galvin calls the 5-0 vote “one of Athletic fi elds: Yes under the shade of a mangrove. On my proudest moments.” Night lighting: No other visits, I have heard what sounds Other large sections on the public Swimming pool: Yes like a plastic soda bottle being opened university’s land are also protected Playground: No – that’s the whoosh of dolphins break- by their status as swampy mangrove ing the surface to exhale. I have also witnessed barren trees crammed with Continued on page 37

36 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 PARK PATROL

Campus Continued from page 36

preserves, but most of the land could be developed. FIU considered selling some of its valuable waterfront property to pri- vate developers a few years ago, but Gov. Jeb Bush quashed the proposal. Any development here requires state approval, and the state wants it reserved only for educational purposes. Given that this state land is free to visit, it is easy to overlook its shortcom- ings. The litter embedded in the shore- line rocks is disheartening. The towering, shady trees are actually invasive Austra- lian pines that crowd out native species. Invasive Brazilian pepper plants are also common. The bugs can be insufferable at times, and as isolated as the area may be, it is still too close to the crazy people Bike path entrance as it extends of Miami to feel completely safe. from NE 135th Street. A footbridge across still waters that rise and fall with the tides. But these transgressions are forgiv- able, because the Biscayne Bay campus to keep the peace, but usually the peace types and dog-walkers acts as the civil- “I’d hate for humans to ruin this gives the community something it really has not been disturbed. The crime of ian patrol. place,” said the dolphin to the manatee. lacks: wide-open spaces. Here is one of the arson has been committed on the forest Here’s hoping that the word will In response, the sea cow burped, “I few places in town where you can wander repeatedly, but I am unaware of any not spread too widely and people will indubitably agree.” around and truly forget where you are. recent, major assaults in the area. A not begin swarming the place in droves, Campus police do appear at times thin but steady stream of university because its magic might diminish. Feedback: [email protected] New water park makes a splash in your neighborhood.

The Grapeland Park is transformed. Once a collection of dusty sports fi elds, it’s now a fun four-pool water park! Grapeland is just one example of more than 400 projects completed thanks to the Building Better Communities Bond Program. Check out the new water park at 1550 NW 37 Avenue.

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March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 37 COLUMNISTS: KIDS AND THE CITY The Parent’s Curse: Damaged Kids It’s our fate — we’re going to mess up no matter what By Jenni Person Is it that the substantial distance BT Contributor between school and home interferes with play-date potential with schoolmates brought my son late to karate the who generally have parental or domestic past two times. My daughter’s staff support available at the right hours I reading homework was incomplete for shuttling? Has she missed too many and she wasn’t properly prepared with birthday parties because of her parents’ a poem she was supposed to recite. In weekend work schedules or because she addition to feeing like I am letting spends her Sundays in Hebrew school for people down in my own life, I now feel the sole purpose (her choice) of keeping like I am letting down two other layers close to the kids she spent her fi rst fi ve of people: my kids and their karate years with in preschool and Torah Tykes? teachers, reading teachers, and class- Is it because she needed some extra room teachers. help reading — her sounding-out skills Recently I was out of town at a lagging behind her otherwise excellent conference for one week and my partner learning skills — and goes to a special- for half of each of the next two. In an ist at reading time (an experience she arrangement that is already a tag-team sees as a special treat)? Is it because the affair, things obviously got spotty. The not satisfi ed by the way I do things. A psychiatrist once observing another music we play for our kids is stuff like poetry assignment slipped through the “You’re sending them out like that?” child in Goldi’s pre-K class even re- Free To Be…You and Me, They Might Be cracks. Having to get my son to karate “Don’t you think she should eat this?” marked that she is the one child all the Giants (both kids’ and regular albums), on a day that is normally my partner’s “He should know better than to kids play with. She has that “cross- and the soundtrack from Moulin Rouge day to take him threw me completely behave like that.” over” appeal, if you will. This was not instead of Hannah Montana and High off schedule. Despite reasonable real- Being a mom is no picnic, and not surprising to her parents, but suddenly School Musical? life reasons for these less-than-perfect just because of the challenges our kids Goldi is telling me she has no friends Her reported perception, real or results, the words of the instructors feel present, but because the only affi rma- in school. Even the kids she talks about imagined, is a red fl ag that I must not like daggers piercing through my qualifi - tion comes from fl eeting moments in our interacting with during her school day ignore. Instead of wasting time beating cations for being a parent. own minds when we observe or partake — at work and at play — she claims are up myself and trying to fi ght the inevi- “Your son is late today…” in our kids’ deliciousness. The rest of the not her friends. table, I need to act. I need to make more “Your daughter was not prepared time all the messages we hear are how And my heart breaks. How have of an effort to get to Pinecrest every with her poem…” we should be doing better. And this, I we created the kid no one wants to be weekend for the birthday parties — even And the layers are deeper than guess, is the nature of the job. The truth friends with? Is it that she has these if it means she only gets a short time simply hearing the disappointment in is parents screw up their kids no matter colorful-artsy-hippie-public-parents there and I have to bring along the baby their voices. Two bright kids — am I what, right? who fl y their freaks fl ags so damn high brother. I need to arrange play dates and screwing them for life? So it shouldn’t surprise me now that they’re visible in space? Parents who are invite classmates over to play, and even Then there’s the grandparent layer! my daughter is squarely into her elemen- only trying to encourage and allow their their families over for Shabbat dinner. I never have to worry about what would tary school years, the implications of kids to let their own imaginations soar? But no way am I changing the music. happen if I were gone — clearly my my/our parenting are getting more public, Is it that her dad is an authority fi gure mother and mother-in-law would be more layered, and more complex. and a very public persona at her school? Keep up with “Kids and the City” by fol- much better at raising my kids than I It seems my Goldi is having some Is it that her mom isn’t like all the other lowing us on Twitter:@BiscayneKids. could ever be. You can tell by the way social challenges. My Goldi, the coiffed designer moms at the affl uent they always make it clear that they are sunshine girl everyone always loves. suburban private school? Feedback: [email protected]

38 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 COLUMNISTS: HARPER’S ENVIRONMENT New Ideas for New Pools Morningside Park could set the standard for “green” swimming pools By Jim W. Harper Several other alternatives for treating BT Contributor water exist, though sadly, none is free. E/The Environmental Magazine lists three types of ith a new public swimming reduced-chlorine options: Nature2’s purifi er; pool coming to our communi- the Aqua-Flo ozone generator, and Chlor- Wty, the question arises as to the Free, a patented chemical compound that environmental impact of constructing replaces chlorine. But there might be an even and maintaining pools. How “green” can better, chemical-free alternative. a pool be? This question didn’t come up Mother Earth News magazine sug- at a Morningside Park public meeting on gests building a natural pool — the February 11, when the City of Miami’s equivalent of a backyard pond that uses parks department announced that fund- aquatic plants as fi lters and frogs or fi sh ing was available to replace the park’s as insect consumers. Even a convention- current, aging pool. al pool can be converted to natural by Attendees vented about getting rid constructing a natural fi lter area along- of the pool altogether or, at the other Florida, and an excellent example can be The pool industry may be cleaning up side it. Search for “natural pools” online extreme, of creating a huge water park. found at Matheson Hammock Park. A few its act. “We don’t talk about ‘going green’ and you’ll see beautiful images of luxuri- A new pool here seems certain, but for more such natural pools in Biscayne Bay, because we associate it with algae,” jokes ous, private Golden Ponds — most likely now its size and style are undecided. done correctly, could convert the bay into a Frank Carmona, general manager at the behind the homes of wealthy Europeans. This project is an opportunity for Miami real and sustainable swimming hole. All Florida Pool & Spa Center in North Personally, I don’t have or want a to create a prototype, low-impact pool. Most unnatural pools, however, give Miami. Yet the growth of alternatives to pool in my backyard, but if I did, the It could be an architect’s dream and a no consideration to their surroundings. traditional chlorine pools shows that a ideal manmade pool would be a cross national model of sustainability. They don’t care how much they displace green-pool market is growing. between an Olympic, 50-meter pool and I must confess I love pools, so it native fl ora and fauna nor how much Carmona offers several recommen- Miami Seaquarium — plenty of space feels odd to look at them critically. My energy they consume for heating and dations. A solar blanket will “reduce and plenty of fi sh. childhood was spent in our backyard maintenance. But what is a concerned the heating bill by 50 percent,” he says. Come to think of it, the best pool is the pool, and as a competitive swimmer for pool owner to do? You could skip the It insulates the water while generating ocean, right here in our communal back- most of my life, I’ve spent thousands next two paragraphs, or you could con- up to ten degrees of heat, and it should yard. That’s why every Sunday I head over of hours in chlorinated bliss. Sure, the sider removing it. Drain it and use it as also reduce evaporation. Carmona also to the beach and go for a swim. Maybe chemicals sting your eyes and bleach an underground painting studio. Fill it up prefers a heat pump versus heat from manmade pools could try harder to imitate your hair. There are remedies for those with dirt to create a giant planter. gas. Third, he promotes a new hybrid- God’s great swimming hole, but they will inconveniences. But is there a remedy If you’re considering a new pool, technology pump, Intellifl ow, that saves never achieve its level of beauty. for the waste generated by pools? What’s think carefully about your options. Use more than 60 percent on electricity. What’s my recommendation for the the best way, environmentally, to create public pools or pools at gyms. Join a The conversion of a chlorine pool new pool in Morningside Park? The aquatic facilities? You don’t hear much neighborhood association and propose a into a saltwater pool is worth exploring. concept would be a place where man about this topic, but it bears consider- community pool. If you still want a pool Saltwater pools still convert their salt and fi sh can coexist, but I don’t know able attention in South Florida, where in your backyard, consider a blow-up into chlorine, but they avoid the mess of how that would be created. If you have a backyard pools sprout like weeds. kiddie pool or a hot tub fi rst. An above- transporting and storing it. Apparently better idea, let us know about it via the One type of eco-pool can be built ground pool may be less disruptive to the they also cut down on its ugly effects, feedback address below. It might just be along a shoreline and fi lled by a natural earth than an in-ground pool, but in the such as red eyes and green hair. The pro- realized as the pool of the future. body of water such as a bay or lake. This long run it might not save much on water cess requires an upgrade to a titanium- alternative makes perfect sense for South consumption and other maintenance. cell mechanism. Feedback: [email protected]

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 39 COLUMNISTS: PAWSITIVELY PETS Just the Two of Us The investment of a little one-on-one, quality time pays a big dividend By Lisa Hartman the same with little 11-month-old Saffy, BT Contributor separating her good deeds from Jay-J’s, and looking directly at her. Sure, many hile busy running to and fro, animals don’t look directly at people or trying to keep up with our other animals as it can be considered a Woverburdened schedules, we challenge and rude, but you can teach seldom get a chance to stop and, as they those animals that it is a good thing to say, smell the roses. (Myself included!) look at you, if you start small and if it Our animal friends sometimes end up has a positive outcome. being neglected as a result. Taking your Being a conscious pet parent does dog out for a walk is an example. It can not stop with dogs or the walk. You can be done quickly and thoughtlessly, or it always make sure you are truly present. can be a wholly different experience. So Like when your cat comes over to you to when you are walking your pet, what are rub against you and sit in your lap. Take you really doing? a few minutes to put aside your maga- You may think I’m going to start zine or your homework. Get on the fl oor preaching the values of training your pet and give him your undivided attention, during a walk — to stay beside you, to and look right at him. not pull, to get proper exercise, and so It may seem funny to you that I’m on. Well, I’m not. Been there, done that. stressing eye contact with your pet, but Besides, the walk should be fun, not a if you really think about it, you might military exercise. realize that you’re always multi-task- I really want you to think about ing during your interactions with your it: What are you doing when you walk pets, not completely acknowledging the dog? Or for that matter, your cat or them. Even a few minutes a day of un- rabbit? Most people I observe may be divided attention can strengthen your walking, but they are doing a lot more relationship far more than walking for talking — on a cell phone, that is. The an hour with your coffee, friends, cell pets are left to amuse themselves while phone, and pet. their masters sip coffee and chat with use this time to be together intensely, not when they do something wonderful. On another note, if you have more friends. The dog possibly hears a mum- just walking side by side or in single fi le. Even Jay-J, now almost fi ve years than one animal, it’s important to avoid bled “Good boy” with barely a glance This may be old, loves to always treating them like a unit, no when he does his business, and possibly the only time hear me matter how much they love each other or It may seem funny that I’m stressing receives a quick pat on the head. But a in the day, make a fuss how well they get along. Separate them walk can be so much more than just a other than eye contact, but you’re always occasionally for a few minutes, even if only now and walk. It is a time for you to be present bedtime, in multi-tasking during your interactions when he does then each week, and spend time with with your animal. which we get with your pets, not completely his business each pet separately. I too fall into this Sometimes I too have other things to be in each acknowledging them. in the right group habit. Both of my dogs need to do on my mind when I walk my dogs, espe- other’s com- spot. My arms their business before I start work, and so cially in the morning, when I’m barely pany. Because extended, I we have ended up a unit of three. awake and planning my work day. But of this, I make sure I really look my dogs greet him, and call him to me like he being conscious of it, I make sure we in the eye and smile and praise them just won a Nobel prize. I make sure to do Continued on page 41

40 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 COLUMNISTS: PAWSITIVELY PETS

Two you, fewer feelings of guilt! It’s quality Continued from page 40 versus quantity, for people and our pets — rabbit, bird, badger, whatever. But truth be told, Saffy doesn’t As I write this, Jay-J and Saffy are always want to go. Since she usually does wrestling next to me. I’ll take a break with most of her bathroom business in the them before I hit the gym. When they take yard fi rst thing in the morning anyway, I turns somersaulting into my lap, as they like have been leaving her home sometimes. to do to make me laugh, I will giggle, smile This gives me a chance to focus on Jay-J at them, and scratch their bellies. It’s a few alone, to connect with him in a way we used to before Saffy came into our lives. He loves Those who are parents to human walking at our old pace, and children know you have to turn off your getting all the attention and Blackberry and shut off the TV to do play for a little while. something with your kids. Those of you who are par- ents to human children know this well. You have to be a con- scious parent sometimes. Turn off your moments of validation to let them know how Blackberry and shut off the TV. With a important they are. A few moments of indi- warm and friendly expression, look them vidual training. And it is important. Then it’s square in the eye when speaking to them. back to our busy lives as an energetic trio. It is important for you to do something with your kids, separating them some- Lisa Hartman is head dog trainer for times as individuals. You’ll notice that Pawsitively Pets. You can reach her at the more you validate them and really [email protected] or notice them, the less actual time you’ll www.pawsitivelypetsonline.com. need to invest for them to be happy and well-adjusted. And as reinforcement for Feedback: [email protected]

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 41 COLUMNISTS: YOUR GARDEN Fear and the Fig Whitefl y Go ahead, rip out that fi cus hedge — we have too many as it is By Jeff Shimonski we have hundreds of feet of Green Button- BT Contributor wood hedges. They defi nitely don’t have to be trimmed as often as a fi cus hedge and few weeks ago I attended a half- never need to be fertilized. day seminar that provided an Crotons. What better way to add color A update on treatment and control to your landscape? Crotons can live 40 or 50 for the fi g whitefl y. There was really years with no fertilizer or insect problems. BT photo by Jeff Shimonski nothing new on the life cycle of this When established, they tolerate drought. insect — approximately one month from Jamaican Caper. This relative of egg to egg, and that it really only likes the caper you eat grows very happily in certain species of fi cus. our area. An attractive plant with very One point that really becomes appar- few problems. At Jungle Island we have ent when discussing fi g whitefl y is the grown them from seed to six-foot-tall fact that this problem is mostly our fault. plants in four years. Why is that? Well, we all planted so Cordyline or Dracaena species. many Ficus benjaminia that our collec- The many relatives of the dracaena can tive South Florida landscape is almost a thrive in our soils. At Jungle Island we monoculture. A monoculture in this in- use hundreds of Dracaena fragrans stance means lots of food for any newly Crotons come in many colors and leaf forms, and they make great hedges. Massangeana. This is an excellent hedge introduced insect or disease that likes to plant and very fragrant when in bloom. dine on that particular species of fi cus. If other plant species here in South Florida Or you can make your yard a chem- Podocarpus species. This is an old- we had very few Ficus benjaminia in the that are resistant to the chemicals available ical-free zone and start to establish full- time South Florida hedge plant that used landscape, there would be no problem. for fi g whitefl y control. time populations of natural predators. At to be quite common. It is very temperate- So now tons of chemicals are being Pesticides need to be rotated or insect the fi g whitefl y seminar, natural preda- looking but does well in our conditions. used in yards everywhere to affect some resistance will occur. That means different tors were identifi ed and discussed. The Acalypha species and varieties. kind of control. Many types and classes of chemicals with different modes of action. fi ve species of Lady beetle, wasp, and These very colorful plants are a bit soft- chemicals were discussed at this seminar. Do not spray or drench unless you fi nd fl y that are known to attack fi g whitefl y leaved and brittle, but they do well here, There were the systemic drenches that the whitefl y on the leaves. No whitefl y, no are all found in our area. So how about tolerate full sun, and are very easy to grow. get taken up by the roots and translocated chemicals. If you have a hedge and only really practicing sustainability? Rip out Areca palm. With enough water, through the tree and foliage, that can last part of it is infested, only spray or drench that fi cus hedge and plant something else. this clumping palm will make a tall, from eight to twelve months. There was the part with the whitefl y. Here are a few recommendations that long-lasting hedge. also foliar spraying that may last a few If someone else is spraying for you, grow in full sun and need little fertilizer Scheffl era arboricola. This is a very weeks at best. I don’t advocate the use of ask them questions like these: What is in our soil conditions: tough plant. Several varieties are available. pesticides, but here are a few points you the effi cacy of this chemical against fi g Clusia. This is an attractive, thick- Hamelia species. This well-known need to be aware of if you spray or hire whitefl y? What is the rate of chemical leaf tree that comes in several sizes and butterfl y plant is now available in differ- someone who will be spraying for you. you are using and why? Are you going to varieties and tolerates salt, drought, and ent species or hybrids. A bit brittle, but Do not use the same chemical to switch chemicals? What is the effect of our soil conditions very well. the sturdier varieties will last for years. drench the roots and spray the foliage. this chemical on benefi cial insects and Silver and Green Buttonwood. These Stop spending so much money trying This could possibly be illegal, depending honey bees? Are you a licensed pest- are excellent plants for our area. They are to save all those fi cus hedges. Try some- on the label and directions that come with control operator? Can you show me the drought resistant, and tolerate salty condi- thing new — and go sustainable. the pesticide. More important, there are different life stages of this whitefl y on tions. Green Buttonwood is considered a already other species of whitefl y infesting the foliage of my plants? mangrove species here. At Jungle Island Feedback: [email protected] TAX & ACCOUNTING OFFICE of Mary Robbins

Personal & Business Tax Returns Monthly, Quarterly & Yearly Accounting Reasonable Rates

786-985-6614 t 9165 Park Dr. Suite 12, Miami Shores

42 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 R ESTAURANT LISTINGS The Biscayneypg Corridor’s most comprehensive restaurant guide. Total this month: 200.

with salmoriglio sauce. The cocktails are, for a change, MIAMI MIAMI NEW THIS MONTH genuinely creative. They pack a wallop, but are refreshing rather than overwrought. Luckily you don’t have to choose MIDTOWN / WYNWOOD / DESIGN DISTRICT UPPER EASTSIDE one or the other. $$$-$$$$ MIAMI Captain Joe Seafood & Pasta Grill News Lounge 3401 N. Miami Ave. (Shops at Midtown) 5582 NE 4th Ct. BRICKELL / DOWNTOWN Manny’s Steakhouse 305-573-6111 305-758-9932; www.the55thststation.com 300 S. Biscayne Blvd. No matter if your splurge in the Shops at Midtown Miami Unlike South Beach’s News Café, Mark Soyka’s new News is, Area 31 305-938-9000 begins at 8:00 a.m. and ends at 10:00 p.m. This eatery will be as its name suggests, more a friendly neighborhood hangout 270 Biscayne Boulevard Way www.mannyssteakhouse.com there for you, with eggs, pancakes, French toast, and bagels and watering hole than a full-fledged eatery. Nevertheless 305-524-5234 M. Night Shyamalan couldn’t have come up with more obvi- till 11:00 a.m. After that it’s a seafood-oriented menu of fast- the limited menu of light bites is -- along with other entertain- www.area31restaurant.com ous irony: Located directly opposite Prime Blue Grille, Miami’s casual food, like a more upscale and more regional version ing lures like an inviting outdoor patio, an intriguing music Not that the sleek interior of this seafood restaurant most intentionally female-friendly steakhouse (light décor, of Long John Silver’s. Best values are combo platters (served selection, a 5:00-9:00 p.m. half-price deal on well drinks and (named for fishing area 31, stretching from the Carolinas lightened dishes), is Manny’s, Miami’s most intentionally with choice of two Latin or All-American sides) such as shrimp selected beers, and rest rooms that resemble eclectic art gal- to South America) isn’t a glamorous dining setting. But masculine steakhouse. Here, ensconced in your black leather and a grilled kebab, a hefty fried or grilled fish sandwich, or leries -- part of the reason that almost all who drop in stay for we’d eat outside. From the expansive terrace on the 16th booth, everything is humongous: dry-aged choice-grade steaks a Caribbean paella. The last is more like a pilaf than Spain’s hours. Especially recommended snacks are fat mini-burgers floor of the Epic condo and hotel on the Miami River, like the Bludgeon of Beef (a boldly flavorful 40-ounce bone-in saffron-rich creation, but is packed with enough mussels, with chipotle ketchup; a brie, turkey, and mango chutney the views of Brickell’s high-rises actually make Miami ribeye, described as “part meat, part weapon”); king crab legs fish, calamari, chicken, and small shrimp to feed two. There sandwich on crusty baguette; and what many feel is the look like a real city. As for ingestibles, it’s hard to decide that dwarf the plate; cocktail shrimp that could swallow the are also more than a half-dozen specials (chicken, shrimp, or original café’s Greatest Hit: creamy hummus with warm pita. A whether the eats or drinks are the most impressive. The Loch Ness monster whole; two-fisted cocktails that would fell a veggie-topped pastas) served from 4:00-9:00 p.m. daily, all for beer list that includes Tucher on tap, plus high-octane Belgian food is impeccably fresh regional fish, prepared in a clean T-Rex. Not for the frail. $$$$$ under seven bucks. $ brews like Duvel and Delirium Tremens, reminds diners that Mediterranean-influenced style, like Royal Red shrimp beer is food too. $

Restaurant listings for the BT Dining is now evident throughout the global (though primarily Asian check-in desks used to be just a lobby extension. Now it’s The Caribbean Delight or Latin American-inspired) menu, in dishes like yuzu/white Bar, which is not just a watering hole with panoramic views. 236 NE 1st Ave., 305-381-9254 Guide are written by Pamela Robin soya-dressed salad of shrimp tempura (with watercress, Vidalia At lunch it’s an elegant sandwich bar; at night it’s a raw bar Originally from Jamaica, proprietor Miss Pat has been serv- Brandt. Every effort has been made onion, avocado, pomegranate), a tender pork shank glazed with (with pristine coldwater oysters) and (best) a tapas bar serving ing her traditional homemade island specialties to downtown spicy Szechuan citrus sauce (accompanied by a chorizo-flecked pintxos. That’s just the Basque word for tapas, but as interpret- office workers and college students since the early 1990s. to ensure accuracy, but restaurants plantain mash), or lunchtime’s rare tuna burger with lively ed by Atrio’s chef Michael Gilligan, there’s nothing mere about Most popular item here might be the weekday lunch special frequently change menus, chefs, and wasabi aioli and wakame salad. For dessert few chocoholics the generously portioned small plates. They range from tradi- of jerk chicken with festival (sweet-fried cornmeal bread can resist a buttery-crusted tart filled with sinfully rich warm tional items like cod fish equixada (a zingy bacalao salad) and patties), but even vegetarians are well served with dishes operating hours, so please call ahead chocolate custard. $$$$$ saffron-sautéed Spanish artichokes to inventive inspirations like like a tofu, carrot, and chayote curry. All entrées come with foie gras and goat cheese-stuffed empanadas, or Asian-inspired rice and peas, fried plantains, and salad, so no one leaves to confi rm information. Icons ($$$) Azul soft-shell crab in airy tempura batter. $$$ hungry – doubly true thanks to the home-baked Jamaican represent estimates for a typical meal 500 Brickell Key Dr., 305-913-8254 desserts. $ Floor-to-ceiling picture windows showcase Biscayne Bay. But Blu Pizzeria e Cucina without wine, tax, or tip. Hyphenated diners are more likely to focus on the sparkling raw bar and open 900 S. Miami Ave. (Mary Brickell Village) Dolores, But You Can Call Me Lolita kitchen, where chef Clay Conley crafts imaginative global cre- 305-381-8335; www.blurestaurantsgroup.com 1000 S. Miami Ave., 305-403-3103 icons ($-$$$) indicate a signifi cant range ations – many of them combinations, to satisfy those who want it More than a mere pizzeria, this spot sports a super-sleek www.doloreslolita.com in prices between lunch and dinner all. One offering, “A Study in Tuna,” includes tuna sashimi, Maine Upper Eastside (of Manhattan) interior. If that’s too formal, opt It’s hard to figure why a Mediterranean/Latin restaurant crab, avocado tempura, and caviar, with several Asian sauces. for a casual patio table while you study the menu over an order (with Asian touches) would be named after a line in a 1950s menus, or among individual items on Moroccan lamb is three preparations (grilled chop, harissa-mari- of warm, just-made gnocchetti (zeppole-like bread sticks, with novel about a New England pedophile. But everything else those menus. nated loin, and bastilla, the famed savory-sweet Middle Eastern prosciutto and savory fontina fondue dip), or creamy-centered about this casually stylish spot is easy to understand — and pastry, stuffed with braised shank), plus feta and smoked egg- suppli alla romana (porcini-studded tomato and mozzarella easy on the wallet. All entrées cost either $18 or $23, a $= $10 and under plant. Finish with a vanilla soufflé your way, a choice of toppings: rice croquettes). And don’t worry. The place looks upscale, price that includes an appetizer — no low-rent crapola, either, chocolate, raspberry, or crème anglaise. $$$$$ but prices of even the fanciest seafood or veal entrées don’t but treats like Serrano ham croquetas, a spinach/leek tart $$= $20 exceed $20. The fare fashioned by chef Ricardo Tognozzi with Portobello mushroom sauce, or shrimp-topped eggplant $$$= $30 Bali (formerly from La Bussola and Oggi) is wide-ranging, but as the timbales. And all desserts, from tiramisu to mango carpaccio 109 NE 2nd Ave., 305-358-5751 name suggests, you can’t go wrong with one of the thin-crusted with lemon crème, are a bargain $2.50. The best seats in $$$$= $40 While Indonesian food isn’t easy to find in Miami, downtown brick-oven pizzas, whether a traditional margherita or inventive this hip hangout, housed in the old Firehouse 4, are on the has secret stashes -- small joints catering to Asian-Pacific cruise- asparagi e granchi (with lump crab, lobster cream, mozzarella, rooftop patio. $$$ $$$$$= $50 and over ship and construction workers. Opened circa 2002, this cute, and fresh asparagus). $$-$$$ exotically decorated café has survived and thrived for good Fresco California Bistro reason. The homey cooking is delicious, and the friendly family Café Sambal 1744 SW 3rd Ave., 305-858-0608 feel encourages even the timid of palate to try something new. 500 Brickell Key Dr. This festively decorated indoor/outdoor bistro packs a lot Novices will want Indonesia’s signature rijsttafel, a mix-and-match 305-913-8358; www.mandarinoriental.com/miami of party spirit into a small space, a large variety of food MIAMI collection of small dishes and condiments to be heaped on rice. Though the Mandarin Oriental Hotel describes this space onto its menu, and a very large amount of informal retro Once you’re hooked, there’s great gado-gado (veggies in peanut as its “casual hotel restaurant,” many consider it a more California-style fusion food onto its plates. To the familiar Brickell / Downtown sauce), nasi goring (ultimate fried rice), and laksa, a complex spectacular dining setting than the upscale Azul, upstairs, Latin American/Italian equation, the owners add a touch coconut-curry noodle soup that’s near-impossible to find made owing to the option of dining outdoors on a covered terrace of Cal-Mex (like Tex-Mex but more health conscious). Menu Acqua properly, as it is here. Note: bring cash. No plastic accepted here. directly on the waterfront. The food is Asian-inspired, with a offerings range from designer pizzas and pastas to custardy 1435 Brickell Ave., Four Seasons Hotel $-$$ few Latin and Mediterranean accents (sushi, plus creative tamales, but the bistro’s especially known for imaginative 305-381-3190 fusion dishes like tangerine-anise spiced short ribs with scal- meal-size salads, like one featuring mandarin oranges, Originally an Italian/Mediterranean restaurant, this comfortably The Bar at Level 25 (Conrad Hotel) lion pancake, or a tempura-battered snapper sandwich with avocado, apple, blue cheese, raisins, candied pecans, and elegant, upscale spot switched chefs in 2006 (to Patrick Duff, 1395 Brickell Ave., 305-503-6500 lemon aioli). For the health-conscious, the menu includes chicken on a mesclun bed. $$ formerly at the Sukhothai in Bangkok), resulting in a complete On the Conrad’s restaurant/lobby-level 25th floor, the expan- low-cal choices. For hedonists there’s a big selection of arti- menu renovation. Thailand’s famed sense of culinary balance sive, picture-windowed space around the corner from the san sakes. $$$-$$$$$ Continued on page 44

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 43 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings take on a trucker’s burger: beef patty, bacon, ham, moz- Buena Vista Bistro Continued from page 43 zarella, lettuce, tomato, and a fried egg, with an arepa corn pancake “bun”) unless it’s a Supermoon perro, a similarly overloaded hot dog. For less dainty eaters, there’s a bandeja Garcia’s Seafood Grille and Fish Market paisa, a mountainous construction containing char-grilled 398 NW N. River Dr., 305-375-0765 steak, pork belly, pork-enriched beans, rice, plantains, eggs, Run by a fishing family for a couple of generations, this and arepas. One hardly knows whether to eat it or burrow in venerable Florida fish shack is the real thing. No wor- to spend the rest of the night. While this tiny place’s late hours ries about the seafood’s freshness; on their way to the (till 3:00 a.m. Thursday, 6:00 a.m. Friday and Saturday) are rustic outside dining deck overlooking the Miami River, surprising, the daytime menu is more so. In addition to all the diners can view the retail fish market to see what looks cholesterol-packed Colombian classics, there’s a salad Nicoise freshest. Best preparations, as always when fish is this with grilled fresh tuna, seared salmon with mango salsa, and fresh, are the simplest. When stone crabs are in season, other yuppie favorites. $-$$ Garcia’s claws are as good as Joe’s but considerably cheaper. The local fish sandwich is most popular – grou- Latitude Zero per, yellowtail snapper, or mahi mahi, fried, grilled, or 36 SW 1st St., 305-372-5205 blackened. The place is also famous for its zesty smoked- Potted plants are the only sign outside this narrow storefront fish dip and its sides of hushpuppies. $-$$ that the room inside is worlds more charming than standard downtown Latin eateries. This urban oasis is an artsy little white- Grimpa Steakhouse tablecloth place (with alternating red tablecloths warming up the 901 S. Miami Ave., 305-455-4757 feel), but with no-tablecloth prices. While much of the menu is www.grimpa.com Miami’s generic Latin mix, there ia a separate Ecuadorian section This expansive indoor/outdoor Brazilian eatery at Brickell Plaza that’s a playlist of that country’s culinary greatest hits. Standouts: is more sleekly contemporary than most of Miami’s rodizio encebollado, a centuries-old fishermen’s soup given national joints, but no worries. The classic sword-wielding gauchos are individuality by yuca and zingy hits of lime; lighter caldo de bola, here, serving a mind-reeling assortment of skewered beef, veggie-packed broth with plantain dumplings; and cazuelas, thick chicken, lamb, pork, sausages, and fish -- 16 cuts at dinner, layered casseroles of mashed plantains and tomato-enriched 12 at lunch. And included in the price (dinner $47, lunch $34) seafood. No clue? Try a bandera, a mixed plate of Ecuador’s is the traditional belly-busting buffet of hot and cold prepared most distinctive dishes, including shrimp ceviche. $$ foods, salad, cold cuts, and cheeses, plus additional accompa- niments -- like irresistible cheese bread -- served tableside. A Novecento Open Lunch & Dinner: 11AM – Midnight pleasant, nontraditional surprise: unusual sauces like sweet/ 1414 Brickell Ave., 305-403-0900 tart passion fruit or mint, tomato-based BBQ, and mango chut- www.bistronovecento.com Sunday Brunch: 11AM - 3PM ney, along with the ubiquitous chimichurri. $$$$-$$$$$ For those who think “Argentine cuisine” is a synonym for “beef and more beef,” this popular eatery’s wide range of Il Gabbiano more cosmopolitan contemporary Argentine fare will be a Patio Open Weekends 335 S. Biscayne Blvd., 305-373-0063 revelation. Classic parrilla-grilled steaks are here for tradi- www.ilgabbianomiami.com tionalists, but the menu is dominated by creative Nuevo Its location at the mouth of the Miami River makes this ultra- Latino items like a new-style ceviche de chernia (lightly lime- upscale Italian spot (especially the chic outdoor terrace) the marinated grouper with jalapeños, basil, and the refreshing perfect power lunch/business dinner alternative for those sweet counterpoint of watermelon), or crab ravioli with ● wanting something beyond steakhouses. And the culinary creamy saffron sauce. Especially notable are entrée salads 4582 NE 2nd Ave 305.456.5909 experience goes way beyond the typical meat market, thanks in like the signature Ensalada Novecento: skirt steak slices part to the flood of freebies that’s a trademark of Manhattan’s (cooked to order) atop mixed greens coated in rich mustard Il Mulino, originally run by Il Gabbiano’s owners. (Free starters: vinaigrette with a side of housemade fries. $$-$$$ A generous hunk of parmegiano-reggiano with aged balsamico dip, assertively garlicky fried zucchini coins, and tomato-topped Oceanaire Seafood Room bruschette.) The rest of the food? Pricy, but portions are mam- 900 S. Miami Ave. moth. And the champagne-cream-sauced housemade ravioli 305-372-8862 JUST OPENED! with black truffles? Worth every penny. $$$$$ www.theoceanaire.com With a dozen branches nationwide, Oceanaire may seem more Indochine All-American seafood empire than Florida fish shack. But while 638 S. Miami Ave. many dishes (including popular sides like bacon-enriched 305-379-1525 hash browns and fried green tomatoes) are identical at all www.indochinebistro.com Oceanaires, menus vary significantly according to regional Indochine has succeeded by morphing from mere restaurant into hip tastes and fish. Here in Miami, chef Sean Bernal (formerly at hangout. Copious special events (art openings, happy hours with DJs, Merrick Park’s Pescado) supplements signature starters like classic movie or karaoke nights, wine or sake tastings) draw every- lump crab cakes with his own lightly marinated, Peruvian-style one from downtown business types to the counterculture crowd. Not grouper ceviche. The daily-changing, 15-20 specimen seafood that there’s anything “mere” about the range of food served from selection includes local fish seldom seen on local menus: pom- three Asian nations. Light eaters can snack on Vietnamese summer pano, parrot fish, amberjack. But even flown-in fish (and the raw rolls or Japanese sushi rolls, including an imaginative masago-coated bar’s cold-water oysters) are ultra-fresh. $$$$ model with mango, spicy tuna, and cilantro. For bigger appetites, there are Thai curries and Vietnamese specialties like pho, richly fla- Pasha’s vored beef soup with meatballs, steak slices, rice noodles, and add-in 1414 Brickell Ave. Asian herbs and sprouts. $$-$$$ 305-416-5116 The original branch on Miami Beach’s Lincoln Road was instantly Iron Sushi popular, and the same healthy Middle Eastern fast food – made 120 SE 3rd Ave., 305-373-2000 with no trans fats or other nutritional nasties – is served at the (See Miami Shores listing) three newer outlets. The prices are low enough that one might Take-out suspect Pasha’s was conceived as a tax write-off rather than a La Loggia Ristorante and Lounge Harvard Business School project, which it was by founders Antonio Delivery! 68 W. Flagler St. Ellek and Nicolas Cortes. Dishes range from common classics like & 305-373-4800 falafel and gyros to more unusual items like muhammara (tangy Great Food, www.laloggia.org walnut spread), silky labneh yogurt cheese, and chicken adana This luxuriantly neo-classical yet warm-feeling Italian res- kebabs with grilled veggies and aioli sauce. Everything from pitas to perfect ambiance & beautiful artwork... taurant was unquestionably a pioneer in revitalizing down- lemonade is made fresh, from scratch, daily. $-$$ town; when it first opened, eating options in the courthouse all in the same place. area were basically a variety of hot dog wagons. With Peoples Bar-B-Que alternatives like amaretto-tinged pumpkin agnolloti in sage 360 NW 8th St., 305-373-8080 butter sauce, cilantro-spiced white bean/vegetable salad www.peoplesbarbque.com we do catering! dressed with truffle oil, and soufflé di granchi (crabmeat Oak-smoked, falling-off-the-bone tender barbecued ribs soufflé atop arugula dressed with honey-mustard vinai- (enhanced with a secret sauce whose recipe goes back grette), proprietors Jennifer Porciello and Horatio Oliveira several generations) are the main draw at this Overtown 3221 NE 2 Ave MIDTOWN continue to draw a lunch crowd that returns for dinner, or institution. But the chicken is also a winner, plus there’s perhaps just stays on through the afternoon, fueled by the a full menu of soul food entrées, including what many afi- Lawyer’s Liquid Lunch, a vodka martini spiked with sweet- cionados consider our town’s tastiest souse. Sides include 786.953.8003/4 ened espresso. $$$ collards, yams, and soft mac and cheese. And it would be unthinkable to call it quits without homemade sweet potato La Moon pie or banana pudding, plus a bracing flop – half iced tea, open 7 days a week for lunch 144 SW 8th St., 305-860-6209 half lemonade. $-$$ At four in the morning, nothing quells the post-clubbing & dinner from 11am to 1am munchies like a Crazy Burger (a heart-stopping Colombian Continued on page 45

44 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings sauces. There are salads and sandwiches, too, including one soy burger to justify the other half of the place’s name. The Continued from page 44 most enjoyable place to dine is the secret, open-air courtyard, completely hidden from the street. Alfano serves dinner on Perricone’s Thursdays only to accompany his “Thursday Night Live” events 15 SE 10th St. featuring local musicians and artists. $-$$ 305-374-9449 www.perricones.com Taste of Bombay Housed in a Revolutionary-era barn (moved from Vermont), 111 NE 3rd Ave.; 305-358-0144 this market/café was one of the Brickell area’s first gentrified No surprise that a place called Taste of Bombay would amenities. At lunch chicken salad (with pignolias, raisins, be an Indian restaurant. And depending mostly on the apples, and basil) is a favorite; dinner’s strong suit is the pasta predominant nationalities of downtown construction work- Fresh Seafood U Steaks list, ranging from Grandma Jennie’s old-fashioned lasagna to ers at any given time, Taste of Bombay has also served chichi fiocchi purses filled with fresh pear and gorgonzola. And sushi, Philippine, and Chinese food. Best bet, though, is Sunday’s $15.95 brunch buffet ($9.95 for kids) – featuring an the all-you-can-eat Indian buffet lunch spread, featuring omelet station, waffles, smoked salmon and bagels, salads, six changing entrées (a mix of meat, poultry, fish, and veg- and more – remains one of our town’s most civilized all-you- etable curries) plus veggie pakoras, rice, salad, chutneys, can-eat deals. $$ hot naan bread, and a dessert. The place looks plain out- side, but it’s pleasantly exotic enough inside for a bargain Prime Blue Grille business lunch. $$ 315 S. Biscayne Blvd., Miami 305-358-5901 Tobacco Road Formal Dining Inside www.primebluegrille.com 626 S. Miami Ave. This truly 21st-century steakhouse targets today’s health- 305-374-1198 minded gourmets by serving only certified-organic Brandt www.tobacco-road.com Casual Dining Inside & Out beef – antibiotic- and hormone-free, as well as dry-aged, Prohibition-era speakeasy (reputedly a fave of Al Capone), gay butchered in-house, and smoke-seared by Prime Blue’s bar, strip club. Previously all these, this gritty spot has been best intense wood-burning grills and ovens. For noncarnivores, known since 1982 as a venue for live music, primarily blues. the menu gives equal time to fish, all caught wild, and offers But it also offers food from lunchtime to late night (on week- Tuna's March Madness dozens of cooked vegetable and salad options, including ends till 4:00 a.m.). The kitchen is especially known for its chili, build-your-own. There’s also a raw bar and a small steak/ budget-priced steaks, and burgers, including the mega-mega seafood retail counter. The décor is as modern as the menu. burger, a trucker-style monster topped with said chili plus ched- Featuring Tuna’s New Raw Bar Instead of the stuffy men’s club look, you have a soaring, dar, mushrooms, bacon, and a fried egg. There’s also surpris- light-hued, open-plan, indoor/outdoor space, with panoramic ingly elegant fare, though, like a Norwegian salmon club with Miami River view. $$$$ lemon aioli. A meat-smoker in back turns out tasty ribs, perfect Northeast Cold Water Oysters accompaniment to the blues. $$ Provence Grill Local Selects, Blue Points, WiAnno’s, etc. 1001 S. Miami Ave. MIDTOWN / WYNWOOD / DESIGN DISTRICT 305-373-1940 The cozy, terracotta-tiled dining room (and even more charming outdoor dining terrace) indeed evoke the south of France. But Adelita’s Café Fresh Florida Lobsters the menu of French bistro classics covers all regions, a Greatest 2699 Biscayne Blvd. Hits of French comfort food: country-style pâté maison with onion 305-576-1262 Fresh Fish from our Local Waters jam, roasted peppers and cornichons; steak/frites (grilled rib-eye From the street (which is actually NE 26th, not Biscayne) this with peppercorn cream sauce, fries, and salad); four preparations Honduran restaurant seems unpromising, but inside it’s bigger, Live Maine Lobsters 1.25 - 5 lbs. of mussels; a tarte tatin (French apple tart with roasted walnuts, better, and busier than it looks. Unlike many Latin American served à la mode). Deal alert: An early-bird prix-fixe menu (5:30- eateries, which serve a multinational mélange, this one sticks Fresh Florida Stone Crabs 7:30 p.m.) offers soup or salad, entrée, dessert, and a carafe of close to the source and proves a crowd-pleaser. On weekends wine for $44 per couple. $$$-$$$$ especially, the two casual dining rooms are packed with families Certified Angus Beef enjoying authentic fare like baleadas (thick corn tacos), tajadas The River Oyster Bar (Honduras’s take on tostones), rich meal-in-a-bowl soups packed Daily Specials 650 S. Miami Ave. with seafood or meat and veggies, and more. To spend ten bucks 305-530-1915 on a meal here, one would have to be a sumo wrestler. $ www.therivermiami.com This casually cool Miami River-area jewel is a full-service Bengal seafood spot, as evidenced by tempting menu selections like 2010 Biscayne Blvd. All you can eat Snow Crabs soft-shell crabs with grilled vegetables, corn relish, and remou- 305-403-1976 lade. There are even a few dishes to please meat-and-potatoes At this Indian eatery the décor is date-worthy, with the typical every Monday in March. diners, like short ribs with macaroni and cheese. But oyster garish brass/tapestry/elephants everywhere replaced by a fans will still find it difficult to resist stuffing themselves silly on cool, contemporary ambiance: muted gray and earth-tone the unusually large selection of bivalves (often ten varieties per walls, tasteful burgundy banquettes. And the menu touts St. Patrick's Day Bash night), especially since oysters are served both raw and cooked “Modern Indian Cuisine” to match the look. Classicists, – fire-roasted with sofrito butter, chorizo, and manchego. To however, needn’t worry. Some dishes’ names are unfamil- All your Irish favorites accompany these delights, there’s a thoughtful wine list and iar, but America’s favorite familiar north Indian flavors are numerous artisan beers on tap. $$$ here, though dishes are generally more mildly spiced and Noon till 2:00 A.M. presented with modern flair. Definitely don’t miss starting Rosa Mexicano with salad-garnished Deshi Samosas (which come with ter- 900 S. Miami Ave. rific cilantro/mint dip) or ending with mango kulfi, Indian ice 786-425-1001 milk. All meats are certified halal, Islam’s version of kosher Open 4PM - 2AM www.rosamexicano.com — which doesn’t mean that observant orthodox Jews can eat A branch of the original Rosa Mexicano that introduced here, but Muslims can. $$$ Ladies 2 for 1 Mon.-Fri, 5-7 PM New Yorkers to real Mexican food (not Tex-Mex) in 1984, this expansive indoor/outdoor space offers a dining experi- Bin No. 18 ence that’s haute in everything but price. Few entrées top 1800 Biscayne Blvd. Happy Hour 5 - 7 PM & 12 - 2AM-7 Days $20. The décor is both date-worthy and family-friendly 786-235-7575 – festive but not kitschy. And nonsophisticates needn’t At this wine bar/café, located on the ground floor of one of Drink, Raw Bar & Food Specials fear; though nachos aren’t available, there is nothing midtown’s new mixed-use condo buildings, the décor is a scary about zarape de pato (roast duck between freshly stylish mix of contemporary cool (high loft ceilings) and Old Early Bird 4-6:30 $14.95 - 7 Days made, soft corn tortillas, topped with yellow-and-habanero- World warmth (tables made from old wine barrels). Cuisine pepper cream sauce), or Rosa’s signature guacamole en is similarly geared to the area’s new smart, upscale resi- molcajete, made tableside. A few pomegranate margaritas dents: creative sandwiches and salads at lunch, tapas and ensure no worries. $$$ larger internationally themed Spanish, Italian, or French 7850 West Dixie Hwy. charcuterie platters at night. Though the place is small Soya & Pomodoro and family-run friendly, Venezuelan-born chef Alfredo N. Miam i Beach, FL 33160 120 NE 1st St. Patino’s former executive chef gigs at Bizcaya (at the Ritz- K^l^koZmbhglLn``^lm^] 305-381-9511 Carlton Coconut Grove) and other high-profile venues are Life is complicated. Food should be simple. That’s owner evident in sophisticated snacks like the figciutto, a salad ,).'2,+')/,) Armando Alfano’s philosophy, which is stated above the entry of arugula, gorgonzola dolce, caramelized onions, pine to his atmospheric downtown eatery. And since it’s also the nuts, fresh figs, and prosciutto. Free parking in a fenced Entertainm ent Schedu les & Specials formula for the truest traditional Italian food (Alfano hails from lot behind the building. $$ Pompeii), it’s fitting that the menu is dominated by authenti- go to: www.tu nasrawbarandgrille.com cally straightforward yet sophisticated Italian entrées such as spinach- and ricotta-stuffed crêpes with béchamel and tomato Continued on page 46

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 45 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings we’d be a helluva hip food town. Located in the intimate at the original Delicias, run by members of the same family, Fratelli Lyon space that formerly housed Restaurant A, it’s the love child eight blocks north on the Boulevard. There are differences here, 4141 NE 2nd Ave. Continued from page 45 of Quebequoise chef Claude Postel and his wife Callie, who notably karaoke on weekends - and a kitchen that doesn’t shut 305-572-2901; www.fratellilyon.com runs the front of the house with exuberantly friendly charm. down till the wannabe American Idols shut up, around 2:00 This Italian café has been packed since the moment it opened. Bleu Moon Like true Parisian bistros, it’s open continuously, every day a.m. But the food is as tasty as ever, especially the reliably fresh No surprise to any who recall owner Ken Lyon’s pioneering Lyon 1717 N. Bayshore Dr. (until midnight!), with prices so low (starters $5-8, entrées traditional ceviches, and for those who like their fish tangy but Freres gourmet store on pre-gentrified Lincoln Road (1992-97), 305-373-8188 $8-15) that one really can drop in anytime for authentic ril- cooked, a mammoth jalea platter (lightly breaded, fried seafood another joint that was exactly what its neighborhood needed. The Deep inside the Doubletree Grand, this restaurant, which lettes (a scrumptious spiced meat spread, like a rustic pâté) under a blanket of marinated onions - the fish and chips of your restaurant’s artisan salumi, cheeses, flavorful boutique olive oils, has panoramic Biscayne Bay views and an outdoor deck, with a crusty baguette, steak with from-scratch frites, salmon dreams). As for nonseafood stuff, no one who doesn’t already and more on the ingredient-driven menu are so outstanding that is one of the few upscale dinner spots near the Arsht atop ratatouille, or many changing blackboard specials. know that Peru practically invented fusion cuisine (in the one can’t help wishing this restaurant also had a retail component. Center for the Performing Arts. The eclectic menu is more Portions are plentiful. So is free parking. And it’s well worth 1800s) will doubt, after sampling two traditional noodle dishes: Well, maybe later. Meanwhile console yourself with the sort of Mediterranean than anything else, from old-fashioned favor- a drive. $$ tallerin saltado (Chinese-Peruvian beef or chicken lo mein) or salamis and formaggi you’ll never find in the supermarket (as ites like lasagna to contemporary creations like gnocchi with tallerin verde (Ital-Latin noodles with pesto and steak). $$ well as rare finds like culatello – prosciutto royalty), including a sun-dried tomatoes, sweet pea purée, pine nuts, and ricotta Charcuterie mixed antipasto esplosione that would feed Rhode Island. Entrées salata. But a few seafood sauces reflect Asian influences, 3612 NE 2nd Ave., 305-576-7877 18th Street Café include properly al dente pastas, plus some regional specialties like and tropical Latin touches abound. Some of the most charm- This Design District old-timer has hung on for close to 20 years 210 NE 18th St. Venetian-style calves liver, rarely found outside Italy. $$$ ing dishes are modernized American, and done well enough as the District has gone through its mood swings. But it’s no 305-381-8006; www.18thstreetcafe.com to make you nostalgic for 1985: creamy (but not gunky) worse for the wear. The upstairs/downstairs space looks good Most of the seating in this cool little breakfast/lunch room is in Grass lobster bisque, lump crab cake with fried capers, and a retro as new, and is still almost impossibly cute. The menu, chalked a sort of giant bay window, backed with banquettes, that makes 28 NE 40th St.; 305-573-3355 arugula salad with caramelized walnuts, bacon, gorgonzola, daily on a blackboard, still features well more than a dozen the space feel expansively light-filled, and quite nicely gentrifies After a couple of years in hiatus, this Design District restolounge fresh berries, and raspberry vinaigrette. $$$$ typical French bistro specials like chicken Dijonaise or almond- its whole evolving Midtown block. This pioneering place deserves has reopened in the same outdoor courtyard space. What’s crusted trout in creamy, lemony beurre blanc. And the salads, to survive, even if just considering the roast beef sandwich with new: “MediterAsian” chef Michael Jacobs and a menu that trav- Brosia soups, and sandwiches are still, invariably, evocative. Rough- creamy horseradish – an inspired classic combination that els beyond pan-Asian and Mediterranean influences into the 163 NE 39th St. cut pâté de campagne, topped with cornichons on a crusty makes one wonder why more places in this town don’t serve it. Americas. Entrées range from lowbrow comfort food (cunningly 305-572-1400 buttered baguette is an instant trip to Paris. Though weekend (We’ll debate later.) Other culinary highlights of the classic “Six S” reinvented mini pot pies) to high-status extravagance (stone- www.brosiamiami.com nighttime hours were instituted several years ago, dinner is an repertoire (soups, sandwiches, salads, sweets, smoothies, spe- seared, authentic Kobe steak). For healthy grazers, raw-bar The reputation that Arthur Artile amassed after years on-again, off-again thing, so call first. $$-$$$ cials) might include a turkey/pear/cheddar melt sandwich, and selections include ceviches and a large seafood platter (lobster, as executive chef at Norman’s and Chispa has made really sinful marshmallow-topped brownies. $ shrimp, and lump crab with housemade dipping sauces). the Design District’s Brosia an instant hit. The menu is The Daily Creative Food Co. There’s also a snack menu (pristine coldwater oysters, a crab Mediterranean-inspired, with a few items — like gazpacho 2001 Biscayne Blvd., 305-573-4535 Five Guys Famous Burger and Fries salad timbale, parmesan-truffle shoestring fries, mini-Kobe Caprese — fusing cuisines, but most retaining regional While the food formula of this contemporary café is familiar – 3401 N. Miami Ave. (Shops at Midtown) burgers) served till the wee hours, providing a welcome alterna- individuality: Moroccan mussels in curry broth; shrimp sandwiches, salads, soups, breakfast food, and pastries, plus 305-571-8345 tive to the Boulevard’s fast food chains. $$-$$$$$ and clams (with garlic, chorizo, and sherry) that scream coffee and fruit drinks – a creative concept differentiates the place. www.fiveguys.com “Spain!” The stylish space is a draw, too. Inside, all mahog- Signature sandwiches are named after national and local newspa- Like the West Coast’s legendary In-N-Out Burger chain, this Joey’s Italian Café any, leather, and luxuriant intimacy; outside, seating on an pers (like the Biscayne Times: tuna salad with hummus, cucumber, East Coast challenger serves no green-leaf faux health food. 2506 NW 2nd Ave. extensive patio shaded by a canopy of old oaks. And the roasted peppers, arugula, and sprouts on multigrain bread), giving You get what the name says, period, with three adds: kosher 305-438-0488 convenient all-day hours (even breakfast) give it the feel of diners something to chat about. For those who’d rather Have It dogs, veggie burgers, and free peanuts while you wait. The first new restaurant in the Wynwood Café District, this a real neighborhood restaurant. $$$ Their Own Way, both sandwiches and salads can be do-it-yourself Which you will, just a bit, since burgers are made fresh upon stylish indoor/outdoor Italian hangout is as casually cool projects, with an unusually wide choice of main ingredients, gar- order, not steam-tabled. Available in double or one-patty as one would hope -- and as affordable. The highest ticket Buena Vista Bistro nishes, breads, and condiments for the creatively minded. $ sizes, they’re well-done but spurtingly juicy, and after loading items are $24 lamb chops with balsamic reduction, and a 4582 NE 2nd Ave., 305-456-5909 with your choice of 15 free garnishes, even a “little” burger few $1000 wines. For starving artists, there’s a five-buck If a neighborhood eatery like this one -- which serves Delicias Peruanas makes a major meal. Fries (regular or Cajun-spiced) are also half-serving of spaghetti al pomodoro and respectable vino supremely satisfying Italian, American, and French bistro 2590 Biscayne Blvd., 305-573-4634 superior, hand-cut in-house from sourced potatoes; a chang- food -- were within walking distance of every Miami resident, Seafood is the specialty at this pleasant Peruvian spot, as it was ing sign reports the spuds’ point of origin. $ Continued on page 47

AuthenticAuthentic Creole Creole CuisineCuisine

CateringCatering Available Available 305.899.2729305.899.2729

13105 West Dixie Hwy. 200 NW 54th Street NorthNorth Miami, FL 33161 Miami, FL 33127 305.893.4246 305.754.2223

46 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings such as a Peruvian jalea mixta (marinated mixed seafood), sides, salumi, and hot prepared dishes. What sets Maino mention a billiard table and 17 TV screens). Regulars know or paella Valenciana from Spain, which many Miami eateries apart from typical rodizio palaces is its family-run feel, intimate daily specials are the way to go. Depending on the day, fish, Continued from page 46 consider a Latin country. What justifies the new millennium rather than intimidating, plus its attention to every detail churrasco, or roast turkey with all the trimmings are all pre- moniker is the more modern, yuppified/yucafied ambiance, (immediately obvious in the classy rustic/elegant décor, high- pared fresh. Big burgers and steak dinners are always good, for under $30. And few can resist delicately thin, crunchy- encouraged by an expansive, rustic wooden deck. Delivery is lighted by striking onyx accents -- bars, tabletops, and more). and happy hour appetizers (like meaty Buffalo wings) are crusted pizzas like the creative Dolce e Piccante (with figs, now available. $$ While it’s rare at most rodizio joints to get meat done less always half-price. Additionally, a limited late-night menu pro- gorgonzola, honey, and hot pepper) or orgasmic Carbonara than medium, Maino’s eager-to-please servers here are happy vides pizza, wings, ribs, and salad till 3:00 a.m. $-$$ (mozzarella, pancetta, asparagus, and eggs). There are Lemoni Café to convey custom-cooking preferences to the kitchen -- and also numerous surprise specials, as the energetic young 4600 NE 2nd Ave. they’re English-speaking, too. One other welcome difference: Moriano chef from Italy’s Veneto region changes the menu twice 305-571-5080 As well as the one-price (hefty) feast, there are à la carte start- 3221 NE 2nd Ave., 786-953-8003 daily. Pastas are fresh; produce is largely local; the mosaic- The menu here reads like your standard sandwiches/ ers and pastas for lighter eaters and noncarnivores, and some http://moriano.wordpress.com centered décor is minimalist but inviting. And no need to salads/starters primer. What it doesn’t convey is the spar- lunch specials. Free parking, too. $$-$$$$$ Ultra-thin, crisp-crusted pizzas as good as Piola’s in South be wary of the warehouse district at night: Valet parking is kling freshness of the ingredients and the care that goes Beach. Made-from-scratch daily specials like green bean free. $$-$$$ into constructing these mostly healthy snacks. Entrée-size Mario the Baker and parmesan soup, or prosciutto and mozzarella-stuffed salads range from an elegant spinach salad (with goat 250 NE 25th St. gnocchi that you really have not seen on every other menu in Kafa Café cheese, pears, walnuts, and raisins) to chunky homemade 305-438-0228 town. A homemade white chocolate/raspberry cake, choco- 3535 NE 2nd Ave. chicken salad on a bed of mixed greens – a hefty help- (See North Miami listing) late ganache cake, and other pastries to die for. High-quality 305-438-0114 ing of protein without typical deli-style mayo overload. ingredients, wine and beer, low prices, enthusiastic hands-on www.kafamidtown.com Sandwiches (cold baguette subs, hot pressed paninis, or Michael’s Genuine Food and Drink owners committed to arts-oriented creativity. A comfortable Opened in late 2007 by a brother/sister team (both origi- wraps, all accompanied by side salads) include a respect- 130 NE 40th St. hang-out atmosphere. This tiny café, where “processed food” nally from Ethiopia, via San Francisco), this casual spot able Cuban, but the deceptively rich-tasting light salad 305-573-5550 is a dirty word, has it all — except a high-visibility location or is located in the stylish indoor/outdoor, multi-roomed cream that dresses a veggie wrap might tempt even hard- Long-awaited and an instant smash hit, this truly neighborhood- media hype. So discover it for yourselves. (There’s ample Midtown space formerly housing Uva and Stop Miami. core cholesterol fans to stick with the sprouts. $-$$ oriented restaurant from Michael Schwartz, founding chef of free street parking, too.) $-$$ Nothing on the breakfast and lunch menus tops $8, Nemo’s in South Beach, offers down-to-earth fun food in a com- and portions feed an army (or several starving artists). Lost & Found Saloon fortable, casually stylish indoor/outdoor setting. Fresh, organic Orange Café + Art Signature item is the formidable Kafa Potato Platter 185 NW 36th St., 305-576-1008 ingredients are emphasized, but dishes range from cutting-edge 2 NE 40th St., 305-571-4070 -- a mountain of wondrously textured home fries mixed www.thelostandfoundsaloon-miami.com (crispy beef cheeks with whipped celeriac, celery salad, and The paintings hanging in this tiny, glass-enclosed café are for with bacon, ham, peppers, onion, and cheese; eggs (any There’s an artsy/alternative feel to this casual and friendly chocolate reduction) to simple comfort food: deviled eggs, sale. And for those who don’t have thousands of dollars to shell style), fresh fruit, and bread accompany. Lunch’s burgers, Wynwood eatery, which, since opening as a weekday-only homemade potato chips with pan-fried onion dip, or a whole out for the local art on the walls, less than ten bucks will get salads, and overstuffed sandwiches (like the roast beef breakfast and lunch joint in 2005, has grown with its neigh- wood-roasted chicken. There’s also a broad range of prices and you art on a plate, including a Picasso: chorizo, prosciutto, man- supreme, a melt with sautéed mushrooms, onion, sour borhood. It’s now open for dinner six nights a week, serving portion sizes ($4-$8 for snacks and small plates to $24-$39 for chego cheese, baby spinach, and basil on a crusty baguette. cream, and cheddar on sourdough) come with homemade Southwestern-style fare at rock-bottom prices. Dishes like extra-large plates) to encourage frequent visits from light-bite as Other artfully named and crafted edibles include salads, daily soup or other sides, plus fruit. Not full yet? The pair has piñon and pepita-crusted salmon, chipotle-drizzled endive well as pig-out diners. Michael’s Genuine also features an eclec- soups, several pastas (like the Matisse, fiocchi pouches filled recently expanded to include night hours with an authentic stuffed with lump crab, or customizable tacos average tic and affordable wine list, and a full bar, with cut-rate weekday with pears and cheese), and house-baked pastries. $ Ethiopian dinner menu, plus beer and wine selections. $5-$8. Also available: big breakfasts and salads, hearty happy hour cocktails. $$-$$$$ $-$$ soups, housemade pastries like lemon-crusted wild berry Out of the Blue Café pie, and a hip beer and wine list. $ Mike’s at Venetia 2426 NE 2nd Ave., 305-573-3800 Latin Café 2000 555 NE 15th St., 9th floor, 305-374-5731 www.outofthebluecafe.net 2501 Biscayne Blvd. Maino Churrascaria www.mikesvenetia.com Forget impersonal chain coffeehouses. This artist-friendly, 305-576-3838 2201 Biscayne Blvd. There’s no sign out front, but this family-owned Irish pub, independent neighborhood café serves a full selection www.latincafe2000.com 305-571-9044 on the pool deck of a waterfront condo building across of coffee drinks made with the award-winning beans of The menu is similar to that at many of our town’s Latin This very upscale Brazilian steakhouse has all the features from the Miami Herald, for more than 15 years has been a Intelligentsia, a roasting company that works directly with cafés, largely classic Cuban entrées and sandwiches, with one expects at a rodizio-style restaurant, including all-you- popular lunch and dinner hang-out for local journalists – and a smattering of touches from elsewhere in Latin America, can-eat meats carved tableside and a lavish buffet of salads, others who appreciate honest cheap eats and drinks (not to Continued on page 48

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 47 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings tuna) topping $20. The capper: It’s open past midnight W Wine Bistro Boteco every day but Sunday. $$ 3622 NE 2nd Ave., 305-576-7775 916 NE 79th St., 305-757-7735 Continued from page 47 Both bistro and retail wine shop, this Design District spot is This strip of 79th Street, formerly known for its live bait and Sake Room run by Florent Blanchet, an energetic young Frenchman who auto repair shops, is rapidly becoming a cool alt-culture artisan growers to encourage sustainable agriculture – and 275 NE 18th St., 305-755-0122 was previously a wine distributor. His former gig led to connec- enclave thanks to inviting hangouts like this rustic indoor/out- one helluva good cup of java. Also served: breakfast and www.sakeroom.com tions that mean if wine lovers don’t find the bottle they want door Brazilian restaurant and bar. Especially bustling on nights lunch sandwiches, imaginative salads, soups, homemade Sake takes a back seat to sushi – and sophisticated décor – at in W’s selection of roughly 200-labels (which emphasizes bou- featuring live music, it’s even more fun on Sundays, when the pastries and creamy fresh-fruit smoothies. With tables, this small but sleek restolounge, which offers South Beach tique and organic growers), Blanchet can probably get it within fenced backyard hosts an informal fair and the menu includes sofas, and lounge chairs inside an old Midtown house, plus sophistication without the prices or attitude, thanks to charm- 24 hours. Food is sophisticated light bites like a shrimp club Brazil’s national dish, feijoada, a savory stew of beans plus free wireless Internet access, the space is also just a pleas- ing proprietor Mario Cicilia. Among the seafood offerings, you sandwich with pancetta and sun-dried tomato aioli; smoked fresh and cured meats. But the everyday menu, ranging from ant place to hang out. Owner Carmen Miranda (real name) won’t find exotica or local catches, but all the usual sushi/ duck salad with goat cheese croutons and a poached egg; unique, tapas-like pasteis (shrimp and hearts of palm-stuffed says beer and wine will soon be available. $ sashimi favorites are here, but in more interesting form, thanks and chocolate fondant. At night there are tapas. $-$$ turnovers) to hefty Brazilian entrées, is also appealing – and to sauces that go beyond standard soy – spicy sriracha, garlic/ budget-priced. $$ Pacific Time ponzu oil, and many more. Especially recommended: the yuzu Zuperpollo Biztro Reztocafe 35 NE 40th St. hamachi roll (chopped Pacific yellowtail with scallions, sesame, 3050 Biscayne Blvd. Le Café 305-722-7369 roe, citrusy dressing, and refreshing shiso leaf), the lobster 305-573-8485 7295 Biscayne Blvd., 305-754-6551 www.pacifictimemiami.com tempura maki (with veggies, chive oil, and an oddly wonderful www.zuperpollo.com For anyone who can’t get over thinking of French food as intimi- Everyone knows Jonathan Eismann’s original, now-defunct tomato sauce), and panko-coated spicy shrimp with hot-and- Occasionally there’s a sign out front of the office building dating or pretentious, this cute café with a warm welcome, and Pacific Time, for many years Lincoln Road’s only serious sour mayo and a salad. $$-$$$ housing this bistro, indicating that a branch of the popular family-friendly French home cooking, is the antidote. No fancy food contemporary restaurant. The question is: How different Uruguayan eatery Zuperpollo (on Coral Way, since 1986) is (or fancy prices) here, just classic comfort food like onion soup, is its new incarnation? Very, and it’s all good, starting with S & S Diner within. Otherwise, since the restaurant opened in 2006, locals escargot, daily fresh oysters, boeuf bourguignon (think Ultimate far superior acoustics (no more voice-shredding conversa- 1757 NE 2nd Ave. have basically had to intuit its presence – way in back, past a Pot Roast), Nicoise salad, quiche, and homemade crème brûlée. tions!), an admirably green ecological policy, and a neigh- 305-373-4291 guard desk and an elevator bank, behind an unmarked door. A respectable beer and wine list is a welcome addition, as is the borhood-friendly attitude (including kid-oriented dishes, Some things never change, or so it seems at this diner, which is Once there, diners discover an extensive pan-Latin menu of housemade sangria. Top price for entrées is about $14. $-$$ plus continuous service of inventive small plates and bar so classic it verges on cliché. Open since 1938, it’s still popular breakfast food, salads, substantial meat and fish entrées, snacks). The food is also more intriguing – simultaneously enough that people line up on Saturday morning, waiting for homemade pastas and soups, desserts, and sandwiches, Canela complexly refined and accessibly clean. While the addition a seat at the horseshoe-shaped counter (there are no tables) including Uruguay’s famed chivito, sometimes called “a heart 5132 Biscayne Blvd., 305-756-3930 of Mediterranean influences to PT’s former Pacific Rim and enormous breakfasts: corned beef hash or crab cakes attack on a bun”: beef, bacon, ham, eggs, mozzarella, plus When this atmospheric little neighborhood oasis opened, the menu may sound confusing on paper, trust us: A meal and eggs with grits; fluffy pancakes; homemade biscuits with sautéed mushrooms and red peppers. And naturally, from the formula was Cuban cooking at lunch, Catalan tapas at night. that includes a butter-grilled asparagus with prosciutto, gravy and Georgia sausage – everything from oatmeal to eggs rotisserie, there’s the zignature zuper chicken. $-$$ The menu is now more uniform: contemporary Spanish and soft-cooked egg Milanese, and preserved lemon; plus an Benedict, all in mountainous portions. The lunch menu is a roll pan-Latin tapas, sandwiches, salads, sides, and entrées at all Asian-accented creamy corn/leek soup with Peeky Toe call of the usual suspects, but most regulars ignore the menu hours, just a far more elaborate selection at night. The tapas crab dumplings, coriander, and mustard oil makes perfect and go for the daily blackboard specials. $-$$ Upper Eastside list is especially impressive, with all the usual Hispanic meat sense on the tongue. $$-$$$$ and cheese favorites but also an unusually large selection of Sra. Martinez Andiamo seafood and vegetarian items such as espinaca à la catalaña Pasha’s 4000 NE 2nd Ave. 5600 Biscayne Blvd. (spinach sautéed with pine nuts and raisins). Must-not-miss 3801 N. Miami Ave. 305-573-5474 305-762-5751 items include ultra-creamy croquetas (ham, cheese, chicken, 305-573-0201 No Biscayne Corridor resident needs to be told that this lively www.andiamopizza.com spinach, or bacalao), grilled asparagus with aioli, and habit- (See Brickell/Downtown listing) tapas bar, in the historic former Buena Vista Post Office, is Sharing a building with a long-established Morningside car forming Brazilian cheese bread. $-$$$ the second restaurant that Upper Eastside homegrrrl Michelle wash, Andiamo is also part of Mark Soyka’s 55th Street Pizzafiore Bernstein has opened in the area. But know this: It’s not one Station – which means ditching the car (in the complex’s Captain Crab’s Take-Away 2905 NE 2nd Ave. of her absentee celebrity-chef gigs. She is hands-on at both free lot across the road on NE 4th Court) is no problem even 1100 NE 79th St., 305-754-2722 305-573-0900 places on any given night. Bernstein’s exuberant yet firmly if you’re not getting your vehicle cleaned while consuming The drive-through window says “fast food,” and so do Those seeking dainty designer pizzas can fuhgeddaboudit here. controlled personal touch is obvious in nearly four dozen hot the brick-oven pies (from a flaming open oven) that are this this long-lived seafood shack’s low prices. And indeed At this New York-style pizzeria (which has roughly the same and cold tapas that, except for a few conventional entrées for popular pizzeria’s specialty. Choices range from the simple there are three Captain Crab’s Take-Aways (the others menu as North Beach’s original Pizzafiore, but independent die-hards, make up the whole menu. Items are frequently rein- namesake Andiamo (actually a Margherita) to the Godfather, are in Carol City and Fort Lauderdale), all related to the ownership), it’s all about heftiness. A special slice/soda deal vented, depending on seasonal ingredients and diner feedback. a major meat monster. Extra toppings like arugula and goat sit-down Crab House restaurants. But there the resem- features two pizza triangles bigger than most Miami mini- Keepers include wild mushroom/manchego croquetas with fig cheese enable diners to create their own designer pies. Also blance to McFauxFood ends. For about the price of a skirts. Whole pies come medium (large), large (huge), and jam (different from Michy’s, but equally flawless); white bean available are salads and panini plus reasonably priced wines bucket of the Colonel’s chicken you can get a bucket of extra-large (think truck tire). And with fully loaded pizzas like stew (duck/foie gras sausage and favas in an intense port wine and beers (including a few unusually sophisticated selections the Captain’s savory garlic crabs. The King’s burger meal the Supreme Meat Lover priced only a few bucks more than reduction); crisp-coated artichokes with lemon/coriander dip; like Belgium’s Hoegaarden). $$ or the Captain’s similarly priced fried (or garlic boiled a basic tomato/ cheese, it pays to think big about toppings simple but addictive Padron-style shishito peppers; and buttery or New Orleans-spiced) shrimp meal? No contest. Also too. Other Italian-American fare is also available, notably pas- bone marrow piqued with Middle Eastern spices and balanced Anise Taverna popular: crab cakes and conch (fried or in fritters and tas and subs. $-$$ by tiny pickled salads. $$$ 620 NE 78th St. chowder). For fish haters, spicy or garlic chicken wings 305-758-2929 are an option; for kids, cut-price “first mate” meals. $-$$ Primo’s Tony Chan’s Water Club www.anisetaverna.com 1717 N. Bayshore Dr. 1717 N. Bayshore Dr. In the past 15 years this river shack has housed at least five Casa Toscana 305-371-9055 305-374-8888 different restaurants. Now new owners Liza and Gigi are bank- 7001 Biscayne Blvd., 305-758-3353 Relatively few people except hotel guests and condo resi- The décor at this upscale place, located in the Grand, a huge bay- ing on Greek food and festivity being the concept that sticks www.casatoscanamiami.com dents are familiar with the Grand’s restaurants (except for side condo/resort hotel, looks far too glitzy to serve anything but -- a good bet, judging from their wildly popular previous eatery, Tuscan-born chef/owner Sandra Stefani cooked at Norman’s Tony Chan’s). The imposing, cavernous lobby just doesn’t politely Americanized Chinese food. The presentation is indeed Ouzo. The mainly mezze menu ranges from traditional Greek (and briefly ran the Indian Creek Hotel’s restaurant) before have that “do drop in” locals’ hangout vibe. But this lively elegant, but the American dumbing-down is minimal. Many small plates like the pikilia (combo dip plate of tzatziki, tarama, opening this Upper Eastside jewel, a wine market/eatery Italian spot is actually a great addition to the neighbor- dishes are far more authentic and skillfully prepared than those hummus, and smoky eggplant purée) or tender grilled octopus whose 30 original seats have been supplemented by a wine hood. The pizzas alone – brick-oven specimens with top- found elsewhere in Miami, like delicate but flavorful yu pan quail to creative Mediterranean-inspired dishes (like anise-scented room/garden for tasting events and private dining. Stefani pings ranging from classic pepperoni to trendy prosciutto/ (minced with mushrooms in lettuce cups). Moist sea bass fillet fish croquettes with spicy aioli) that never stray too far from travels regularly to Italy to find exciting, limited-production arugula – would be draw enough. But pastas are also has a beautifully balanced topping of scallion, ginger, cilantro, the fold to remain evocative. But don’t neglect large plates like wines and inspiration for truly Tuscan-tasting daily special planned to please: diners’ choice of starch, with mix-and- and subtly sweet/salty sauce. And Peking duck is served as three whole grilled Mediterranean fish (dorade or branzino), filleted dishes with honest, authentic flavors, such as grilled wild boar match sauces and extras. And the price is right, with few traditional courses: crêpe-wrapped crispy skin, meat sautéed with tableside. The interior décor is charming, and the outdoor deck entrées (whether traditional veal piccata or seared ahi crisp veggies, savory soup to finish. $$$-$$$$ on the Little River is positively romantic. $$-$$$ Continued on page 49

Monday-Thursday 6pm-11pm “Ariston is derived from the Greek aristos, meaning 'the best,' and it just might be.”--Victoria Pesce Elliott, Miami Herald Friday 6pm-12am Saturday 12pm-12am “A restaurant that pleases its patrons. Ariston has started out doing just that.”-- Lee Klein, Miami New Times Sunday 1pm-10:30pm “Ariston continues the lucky streak with classical Greek cuisine based on recipes of owner Thanasis Barlos’s mom.”-- Biscayne Times Miami Spice is over, but our "Taste of Greece" set menus Live On! Come & tr y our $ .95 $ .95 Lunch Set Menus for 9 or 12 Dinner Set Menus offered Sunday - Thursday for $17.50, $23.50 & $27.50 940 71st Street, Miami Beach ● 305-864-9848 ● www.aristonrestaurantmiami.com

48 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings El Q-Bano Palacio de los Jugos Jimmy’s East Side Diner Though the casually cute indoor/outdoor place is only open 8650 Biscayne Blvd. 7201 Biscayne Blvd., 305-754-3692 for weekday lunches, “cantina” dinners can be ordered and Continued from page 48 305-758-2550 Open for more than 30 years, Jimmy’s respects the most picked up after hours. $ In case you were wondering if it’s too good to be true -- it isn’t. El important American diner tradition: Breakfast at any hour. sausages with lentil croquettes. Favorites that show up often Q-Bano’s owners are indeed related to the family that operates Admittedly the place closes at 4:00 p.m., but still. There are Michy’s on the menu include pear and ricotta raviolini with sage but- the original three Palacios de los Jugos -- which means no more blueberry hot cakes and pecan waffles for sweet-tooth eaters; 6927 Biscayne Blvd., 305-759-2001 ter sauce, grilled eggplant slices rolled around herbed goat schlepping way out west for the chicharrones against which all eggs any style, including omelets and open-face frittatas for Don’t even ask why Michele Bernstein, with a résumé that cheese and sun-dried tomatoes, and a light ricotta tart with others pale. Also recommended are moist tamales, tasty sand- those preferring savories; and a full range of sides: biscuits includes top-chef gigs at upscale eateries like Azul, not to lemon and rosemary. $$$ wiches (especially the drippingly wonderful pan con lechon), rich and sausage gravy, grits, hash, hash browns, even hot oat- mention regular Food Network appearances, opened a homey flan, and the fresh tropical juices that justify the aforementioned meal. Also available are traditional diner entrées (meat loaf, restaurant in an emerging (but far from fully gentrified) neigh- Che Sopranos excesses. For even heartier eaters, there’s a changing buffet of roast turkey, liver and onions), plus burgers, salad platters, borhood. Just be glad she did, as you dine on white almond 7251 Biscayne Blvd. daily specials and sides. And those ordering the combo platter of, and homemade chicken soup. $-$$ gazpacho or impossibly creamy ham and blue cheese croqu- 305-754-8282 basically, Cuba’s Greatest Hits had better take advantage of the etas. Though most full entrées also come in half-size portions This branch of a Miami Beach Italian/Argentine pizzeria, housed free delivery, since waddling home will be difficult. $-$$ Karma (at almost halved prices), the tab can add up fast. Table-to- in a charming bungalow and featuring a breezy patio, covers 7010 Biscayne Blvd., 305-759-1392 table conversations about the food are common, something multicultural bases. If the Old World Rucola pizza (a classic Europa Car Wash and Café A real car wash with meticulous detailing takes time. But kill- that only happens at exciting, if not flawless, restaurants. And Margherita topped with arugula, prosciutto, and shredded 6075 Biscayne Blvd. ing an hour is a pleasure at this stylish car wash/tapas bar, at this one, the star herse lf is usually in the kitchen. Parking in parmesan) doesn’t do the trick, the New World Especial (a Latin 305-754-2357 where the elegant light fare occasionally even outshines the the rear off 69th Street. $$$-$$$$ pie with hearts of palm and boiled eggs) just might. Also avail- Giving new meaning to the food term “fusion,” Europa serves hand-washed automobiles. Vegetarians do especially well, able are pastas, salads, sandwiches, dinner entrées (eggplant up sandwiches, salads, car washes, coffee with croissants, and with crusty baguette sandwich combos like brie, walnuts, and Moonchine parmigiana with spaghetti, lomito steak with Argentinean potato Chevron with Techron. Those who remember this former no-frills honey, or another featuring grilled artichokes and buttery St. 7100 Biscayne Blvd., 305-759-3999 salad), and desserts (tiramisu or flan). $ filling station only as one of the Boulevard’s cheapest sources of Andre cheese. Lower carb items range from an imported olive Like its Brickell-area older sibling Indochine, this friendly indoor/ brand-name gas will be astonished at the invitingly expanded interi- assortment to an antipasto platter with Spanish Cantimpalo outdoor Asian bistro serves stylish fare from three nations: Chef Creole or. Snacks match the casual chicness: sandwiches like the Renato chorizo, manchego cheese, and garbanzos. There are break- Japan, Thailand, and Vietnam. Menus are also similar, split 200 NW 54th St. (prosciutto, hot cappicola, pepper jack cheese, red peppers, fast and dessert pastries too. Beverages include organic between traditional dishes like pad Thai and East/West fusion 305-754-2223 and Romano cheese dressing); an elaborate almond-garnished coffee and soy chai lattes, as well as wines and an extensive creations like the Vampire sushi roll (shrimp tempura, tomato, Sparkling fresh Creole-style food is the star at chef/owner Chinese chicken salad; H&H bagels, the world’s best, flown in from beer list featuring Belgian brewskis. On Thursday nights the cilantro, roasted garlic). But the café also carves out its own Wilkinson Sejour’s two tiny but wildly popular establish- NYC. And the car cleanings — done by hand, not finish-scratching car wash transforms into a chic lounge until 2:00 a.m. $-$$ identity with original creations, including yellow curry-spiced ments. While some meatier Haitian classics like griot (fried machines — are equally gentrified, especially on Wednesday’s Moonchine fried rice or Popeye’s Salad (spicy tuna, avocado, pork chunks) and oxtail stew are also available – and a “Ladies Day,” when women are pampered with $10 detail washes Kingdom spinach, masago roe, sesame seeds, and a scrumptious $3.99 roast chicken special is a hard deal to resist – the and glasses of sparkling wine while they wait. $ 6708 Biscayne Blvd., 305-757-0074 sweet/hot kimchee dressing). Nearly everything is low in sodi- glistening fish display that greets diners as they walk in This newly renovated, indoor/outdoor sports bar serves um, fat, and calories – except desserts (notably the chocolate makes it clear that seafood is the specialty here: crevette Garden of Eatin’ low-priced but high-quality steaks, plus more typical bar bomb). There’s also an impressive sake list, too. Coming soon: en sauce (steamed shrimp with Creole butter sauce), lambi 136 NW 62nd St. food that’s actually far from the usual premade, processed a large rear patio for dining and entertainment. $$-$$$ fri (a mountain of perfectly tenderized fried conch), poisson 305-754-8050 stuff. Philly cheese steak sandwiches, big enough for two, gros sel (local snapper in a spicy butter sauce), garlic or Low profile would be an understatement for this place. are made from hand-sliced rib eye; sides include fries and Moshi Moshi Creole crabs. Note for ambiance-seekers: The Miami branch Housed in a yellow building that’s tucked in back of a parking beer-battered onion rings, but also lightly lemony sautéed 7232 Biscayne Blvd., 786-220-9404 has outdoor tiki-hut dining; North Miami’s outlet, a former lot behind a small grocery store, it’s nearly invisible from the spinach. And the burgers rule, particularly the Doomsday, “Spruced up” is a supreme understatement for the space, Carvel, has the same food but lacks the tropical charm. $-$$ street. Inside, though, it has the comfortable feel of a beach a cheese/ bacon/mushroom-topped two-pound monster formerly the Haitian hole-in-the-wall Fidele. Now a boutique bar, and generous servings of inexpensive Afro-Caribbean that turns dinner into a competitive sport. But even the Japanese eatery, this younger sibling of South Beach old-timer Dogma Grill vegan food. Rastafari owner Immanuel Tafari cooks up meat smallest Queenburger (a half-pounder that’s no sissy) is a Moshi Moshi is a cross between a sushi bar and an izakaya 7030 Biscayne Blvd. and dairy-free specials, like Jamaican pumpkin/chayote stew perfectly seasoned contender. No hard liquor, but the beer (Japanese tapas bar). Even more striking than the hip décor is 305-759-3433 in coconut milk, that depend on what looks good at that morn- list makes up for it. $$ the food’s unusually upscale quality. But this isn’t surprising given www.dogmagrill.com ing’s produce market. Large or small plates, with salad and the owners’ previous work: Toshi Furihata and Hiro Terada were What could induce downtown businessmen to drive to the fried sweet plantains (plus free soup for eat-in lunchers), are Luna Café executive chefs at SushiSamba and Doraku; Yani Yuhara is an Upper Eastside to eat at a few outdoor-only tables just feet from served for five or seven bucks. Also available are snacks like 4770 Biscayne Blvd., 305-573-5862 ex-Benihana manager. Sushi ranges from pristine plain individual the busy Boulevard? From the day it opened, people have been vegetarian blue corn tacos, desserts like sweet potato pie, www.lunacafemidtown.com nigiri (all the usuals plus rarer finds like toro) to over-the-top maki lining up, even in summer’s sweltering heat, for this stand’s and a breakfast menu featuring organic blueberry waffles with The ground floor of the Wachovia Bank building may not rolls like the signature Moshi Moshi (tuna, white tuna, salmon, sauce-garnished, all-beef, soy veggie, turkey, and chicken hot soy sausage patties. $ seem a particularly evocative locale for an Italian eatery, avocado, masago, tempura flakes, spicy mayo). Tapas also go dogs. The 22 varieties range from simple (the Classic, with but once inside, the charming décor and the staff’s ebul- beyond standards like edamame to intriguing dishes like arabiki ketchup, relish, and chopped onion) to the elaborate (the Gourmet Station lient welcome indeed are reminiscent of a café in Italy. The sausage, a sweet-savory pork fingerling frank with a superior Athens, topped with a Greek salad, including extra-virgin olive oil 7601 Biscayne Blvd. kitchen’s outstanding feature is a brick oven, which turns pop/spurt factor; rarely found in restaurants even in Japan, dressing) to near-unbelievable combinations like the VIP, which 305-762-7229 out designer pizzas (greater in variety, lesser in cost on the they’re popular Japanese home-cooking items. And rice-based includes parmesan cheese and crushed pineapple. $ Home-meal replacement, geared to workaholics with no time lunch menu, in effect till 4:30 p.m.) and crisp-skinned roast plates like Japanese curry (richer/sweeter than Indian types) to cook, has been trendy for years. But the Gourmet Station chickens. Otherwise the menu holds few surprises – except satisfy even the biggest appetites. $-$$$ East Side Pizza has outlasted most of the competition. Main reason: decep- the prices, surprisingly low for such a stylish place. No dish 731 NE 79th St. tive healthiness. These are meals that are good for you, yet exceeds $22. $$-$$$ Pineapple Blossom Tea Room 305-758-5351 taste good enough to be bad for you. Favorite items include 8214 Biscayne Blvd., 305-754-8328 Minestrone, sure. But a pizzeria menu with carrot ginger precision-grilled salmon with lemon-dill yogurt sauce, and lean The Lunch Room www.pineappleblossom.com soup? Similarly many Italian-American pizzerias offer entrées turkey meatloaf with homemade BBQ sauce – sin-free com- 7957 NE 2nd Ave., 305-722-0759 The interior of this pineapple-yellow building is a soothing like spaghetti and meatballs, but East Side also has pumpkin fort food. For lighter eaters, there are wraps and salads with Hidden in Little Haiti, this Thai/Japanese spot, which opened oasis offering traditional full English tea service – or a more ravioli in brown butter/sage sauce, wild mushroom ravioli, a large, interesting choice of dressings. Food is available à la in 2005, remains one of the Upper Eastside’s best-kept zingy tropical fruit-flavored Caribbean variation. Whether your and other surprisingly upscale choices. The East Side Salad carte or grouped in multimeal plans customized for individual secrets. But chef Michelle Bernstein (of Michy’s) and other chosen brew is steaming Earl Grey or pineapple-mint iced tea, includes goat cheese, walnuts, and cranberries; quaffs diner’s nutritional needs. $$ knowledgeable diners wander over from the Boulevard for the scones (with thick cream and jam), tea cakes, cookies, include imported Peroni beer. As for the pizza, they are clas- simple but perfect pad Thai, chili grouper (lightly battered fil- and desserts, are hometown treats. Owner Frances Brown is sic pies, available whole or by the slice, made with fresh plum Hiro’s Sushi Express lets in a mouthwatering tangy/sweet/hot sauce), silky Asian a pastry chef. There’s more substantial fare, too. Innovative tomato sauce and Grande mozzarella (considered the top 5140 Biscayne Blvd. eggplant slices in Thai basil sauce, and other remarkably wraps like Caribbean shrimp salad with tropical fruit salsa; American pizza cheese). Best seating for eating is at the shel- 305-759-0914 low-priced specialties of Matilda Apirukpinyo, who operated tered outdoor picnic tables. $ (See North Miami Beach listing) a critically acclaimed South Beach Thai eatery in the 1990s. Continued on page 50

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 49 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings ranging from traditional red or green curries to the inven- Biscayne Bay is priceless. Floor to ceiling picture windows well as a neighborhood eatery. And the wide range of bud- tive, such as an unconventional honey sauce. $$$ serve as the expansive indoor dining space’s rear wall, but get-friendly, homemade pastas, made daily, remains the Continued from page 49 the primo seats are outdoors, in sheltered banquettes and main draw for its large and loyal clientele. Choices range UVA 69 patio tables where the water view, and carefree tropical from homey, meaty lasagna to luxuriant crab ravioli with salads such as warm goat cheese with fresh greens, toma- 6900 Biscayne Blvd. party feel, is unimpeded. $$-$$$$ creamy lobster sauce, with occasional forays into creative toes, dried cranberries, and candied cashews. Also offered are 305-754-9022 exotica such as seaweed spaghettini (with sea scallops, tempting take-out baskets like the Tea for Two (with tea, jam, www.uva-69.com Bocados Ricos shitakes, and fresh tomatoes). For those tempted by too scones, and cookies), great for gifts or for at-home teas. $-$$ Owned by the Vega brothers (chef Michael and art- 1880 79th St. Causeway; 305-864-4889 much, ultra-accommodating servers have been known to ist Sinuhé) of Cane á Sucre – now defunct, but one of Tucked into a mall best known for housing the Happy Stork allow half orders of two pastas. $$-$$$ Red Light Midtown Miami’s first cool, contemporary cafés – this Lounge, this little luncheonette joint services big appetites. 7700 Biscayne Blvd., 305-757-7773 more ambitious yet casual outdoor/indoor Euro-café and Along with the usual grilled churrascos, there’s an especially Shuckers Bar & Grill Only in Miami: From the rustic al fresco deck of chef Kris lounge serves the same purpose on the Upper Eastside, belly-busting bandeja paisa (Colombia’s sampler platter of 1819 79th St. Causeway, 305-866-1570 Wessel’s intentionally downwardly mobile retro-cool riverfront helping to transform a commuter strip into a hip place to grilled steak, sausage, chicharron, fried egg, avocado, plantains, “Cheap eats and a million-dollar view” is the sound bite restaurant, located in a refurbished old motel, you can enjoy hang out. The menu has grown more sophisticated along rice, and beans). But do not miss marginally daintier dishes manager Philip Conklin uses to describe this outdoor beach regional wildlife like manatees (Florida’s own half mammal/ with the neighborhood. Lunch includes a variety of salads like sopa de costilla, if this rich shortrib bowl is among the daily bar, hidden in back of a bayfront motel. The joint dates from half meatloaf) while enjoying eclectic regional dishes that range and elegant sandwiches like La Minuta (beer-battered changing homemade soups. Arepas include our favorite corn South Beach’s late 1980s revival, but the kick-off-your-shoes from cutting-edge (sour-orange-marinated, sous-vide-cooked mahi-mahi with cilantro aioli and caramelized onions on cake: the hefty Aura, stuffed with chorizo, chicharron, carne vibe – not to mention the pool tables and jukebox – couldn’t Florida lobster with sweet corn sauce) to comfort (crispy- housemade foccacia). Dinner features a range of small desmechada (shredded flank steak), plantains, rice, beans, be farther from SoBe glitz. The food ranges from classic bar breaded Old South fried green tomatoes). The menu is limited, plates (poached figs with Gorgonzola cheese and honey and cheese. Garnished with even more over-the-top abandon favorites (char-grilled wings, conch fritters, raw or steamed which makes sense with a chef-driven place; and it changes balsamic drizzle) and full entrées like sake-marinated are Colombian-style hot dogs like the Perro Rico, topped with shellfish) to full dinners featuring steak, homemade pasta, daily, which also makes sense at an ingredient-driven place. But salmon with boniato mash, Ponzu butter sauce, and crispy chicharron, chorizo, cheese, a quail egg, and pineapple to can- or fresh, not frozen, fish. And since about half of the estab- several signature specialties, if they’re available, are not to be spinach. Drink specials and live music on weekends. cel out the cholesterol. Ha! But who cares? Strap on the med lishment is sheltered, the bites and bay view rock even when missed: BBQ shrimp in a tangy Worcestershire and cayenne- $$-$$$ emergency bracelet and bring it on. $-$$ the weather sucks. $-$$ spiked butter/wine sauce, irresistible mini conch fritters, and homemade ice cream. $$-$$$ Ver-Daddys Taco Shop Edy’s Chicken & Steak Sushi Siam 7501 Biscayne Blvd. 1624 79th St. Causeway 1524 NE 79th St. Causeway, 305-864-7638 Royal Bavarian Schnitzel Haus 305-303-9755 305-864-9958 (See Miami / Upper Eastside listing) 1085 NE 79th St., 305-754-8002 At this soulful taco shop, the menu descriptions are in com- It might initially seem that the steaks (sirloin, filet, or a chewy With Christmas lights perpetually twinkling and party mon English (“cinnamon puffs” drizzled with honey and lime, “marucha” top round) are what differentiate Edy’s from Miami’s noises emanating from a new outdoor biergarten, this not “buñuelos”). But taco fillings range from the commonplace many other chicken joints. But what really makes the place NORTH BEACH German restaurant is owner Alex Richter’s one-man (ground beef, shredded chicken) to more unusual pork in stand out is the signature Peruvian pollo a la brasa, char- gentrification project, transforming a formerly uninvit- chili verde, fried potato, or Baja battered fish (authentically broiled in a wood-fired rotisserie rather than simply plonked Ariston ing stretch of 79th Street one pils at a time. The fare garnished with Mexican crema and cilantro-spiked cabbage). on a grill. The rotation makes the bird self-baste, keeping even 940 71st St., 305-864-9848 includes housemade sausages (mild veal bratwurst, And all offerings can be loaded with other garnishes from the the delicate white meat juicy under its crispy, nearly fat-free It took a Greek place (Ouzo’s, which moved to bigger SoBe hearty mixed beef/pork bauernwurst, spicy garlicwurst) kitchen (refried beans, cheese, crema) or less perishable offer- skin. Spicing is also superior. The original recipe of owner Edy quarters in 2007) to break the curse of this former restaurant with homemade mustard and catsup; savory yet near- ings from a salsa bar. For the heath-minded, oils are nonhydro- Dernovsek’s secret dozen-ingredient marinade came from a jinx location. And Ariston continues the lucky streak with clas- greaseless potato pancakes; and, naturally, schnitzels, a genated, and sauces/seasonings are all housemade and free visit to Peru, but has been tweaked with typical spices from her sical Greek cuisine based on recipes of co-owner Thanasis choice of delicate pounded pork, chicken, or veal patties of preservatives. $ hometown -- Chiang Mai, Thailand. The result is subtly mouth- Barlos’s mom Noni Barlou, and executed by CIA-trained chef served with a half-dozen different sauces. $$-$$$ warming heat absent from average chain chickens. Nothing Alexia Apostolidis. Skip the menu’s puzzling Italianesque and Wine 69 leaps out at you, but there’s just enough of a taste-bud tease to generic Euro-American selections and concentrate on authentic Soyka 6909 Biscayne Blvd. make the poultry’s own flavors jump. For serious fire, green chili treats like the lightest, most savory whipped tarama (caviar 5556 NE 4th Court 305-759-0122 sauce comes with all orders. $-$$ spread) west of Athens; ultra-rich tzatziki (Greek yogurt with 305-759-3117; www.soykarestaurant.com From the name, one might think this is just a wine shop. cukes, garlic, and olive oil); bracing avgolemono (egg-thickened This expansive, contemporary hangout was often credited It’s actually about wine, food, and art, and how they work Japanese Market and Sushi Deli chicken/lemon soup); char-grilled sardines with greens and with almost single-handedly sparking the revitalization together. Wines, about 200 labels, are available retail (at 1412 79th St. Causeway; 305-861-0143 citrus dressing; or an inspired eggplant/ground beef moussaka, of the Biscayne Corridor’s Upper Eastside. Now that the 35-50 percent of their marked prices, which are for in- Inside a small market that is, nevertheless, widely consid- bound here with an almost sinfully custardy béchamel. $$-$$$ hype has calmed down, Soyka remains a solid neighbor- house drinkers), with 40 sold by the glass. But the place’s ered Miami’s premier source of Japanese foodstuffs, the hood restaurant that, like restaurateur Mark Soyka’s specialty is comparative flights of various wine types from “Sushi Deli” restaurant component is nothing more than a Café Prima Pasta previous ventures (notably Ocean Drive’s pioneering News different regions. Food, designed for pairing, includes a lunch counter to the left of the entrance. But chef Michio 414 71st St., 305-867-0106, www.primapasta.com Café and the Van Dyke on Lincoln Road) is a perfect fit new $25 three-course dinner. But the menu is mostly light Kushi, who worked for years at the Sushin, Miami’s first full- Opened in 1993 with 28 seats, this family-run North Beach for its area. Comfortably priced yuppie comfort food like bites with intriguingly inventive touches: a seared Cajun service Japanese restaurant, serves up some sushi found landmark has now taken over the block, with an outdoor ter- meatloaf with mashed potatoes, crab cakes with spicy- tuna salad with wasabi sauce; crab cakes with Asian nowhere else in town. Example: traditional Osaka-style sushi race and multi-roomed indoor space whose walls are full of sweet slaw, a wild mushroom/smoked mozzarella pizza, sriracha chili sauce; a three-cheese soufflé. Especially – layers of rice, seasoned seaweed, more rice, and marinat- photos of their clientele (including national and local celebs). or a Cobb salad may not be revolutionary fare, but Soyka impressive are some nicely priced cheese/charcuterie ed fresh mackerel, pressed into a square box, then cut into Particularly popular are homemade pastas, sauced with continues to thrive while more ambitious, nationally publi- platters, served with fig tapenade, cornichons, fresh fruits, lovely one-bite sandwich squares. While raw fish is always Argentine-Italian indulgence rather than Italian simplicity: crab- cized restaurants like OLA have come and gone. $$-$$$ bread, and multiple sauces. And the art part encompasses impeccable here, some unusual vegetarian sushi creations meat ravioletti in lobster cream sauce, black squid ink linguini revolving exhibits, plus an art lecture series featuring wines also tempt, as do daily entrées, like curried beef stew, that heaped with seafood. Veal dishes, such as piccata with white Sushi Siam picked by owner Ben Neji to compliment the art. $$ typify Japanese home cooking. $ wine-lemon-caper sauce, are also a specialty. Though romantic 5582 NE 4th Ct., 305-751-7818 enough for dates, the place is quite kid-friendly — and on the On the fairly standard menu of sushi-bar specialties plus a Mario the Baker terrace, they’ll even feed Fido. $$$ small selection of Thai and Japanese cooked dishes, there NORTH BAY VILLAGE 1700 79th St. Causeway are a few surprises, such as a unique lobster maki that’s 305-867-7882 Tamarind Thai admittedly huge in price ($25.95), but also in size: six Barchetta on the Bay (See North Miami listing) 946 Normandy Dr. ounces of crisp-fried lobster chunks, plus asparagus, avo- 1601 79th St. Causeway, 305-861-2228 305-861-6222; www.tamarindthai.us cado, lettuce, tobiko (flying fish), masago (smelt) roes, and Location, location, location. The truth of the old real estate Oggi Caffe When an eatery’s executive chef is best-selling Thai cookbook special sauces. Also popular are red and orange dragon cliché could not be better illustrated than at this reasonably 1666 79th St. Causeway author Vatcharin Bhumichitr, you’d expect major media hype, rolls, similarly sauced makis of fried shrimp plus veggies, priced Italian restaurant. While pastas like lobster ravioli in 305-866-1238; www.oggicaffe.com fancy South Beach prices, and a fancy SoBe address. Instead topped with, respectively, raw tuna and salmon. Thai tomato/cream vodka sauce are under $20, and no meat This cozy, romantic spot started back in 1989 as a pasta dishes come with a choice of more than a dozen sauces, or seafood entrée exceeds $30, the spectacular setting on factory (supplying numerous high-profile restaurants) as Continued on page 51

50 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings national dish. If it’s Saturday, it must be ajiaco. Both are thick cochinita pibil, refried beans, and pickled onions. $$ Chef Creole chicken soups, full meals in a bowl. But veggies and garnishes 13105 W. Dixie Hwy.; 305-893-4246 Continued from page 50 vary, and this modest Colombian eatery is a handy spot to Canton Café (See Miami listing) comparison-test such typical stews. Adventuresome eaters may 12749 Biscayne Blvd. Bhumichitr joined forces with Day Longsomboon (an old Thai want to try another Saturday special, mondongo (tripe soup, 305-892-2882 Chipotle Mexican Grill school pal who’d moved to Miami) at this unpretentious, similar to Mexico’s menudo). For Colombian-cuisine novices, Easily overlooked, this strip-mall spot serves mostly Cantonese- 14776 Biscayne Blvd., 305-947-2779 authentic (no sushi) neighborhood place. Some standout dishes a Bandeja Paisa (sampler including rice, beans, carne asada, based dishes, ranging from all the old Chinese-American classics www.chipotle.com here (like shrimp and corn cakes with plum sauce, deep-fried chicharron, eggs, sautéed sweet plantains, and an arepa corn (chop suey, moo goo gai pan, pu pu platters) through newer Proving that national fast-food chains don’t have to be bad sweet and sour fish, and roast duck with tamarind sauce) are cake) is available every day, as are antojitos – “little whims,” Americanized fusion favorites like honey garlic chicken, teriyaki for either diners or the environment, Chipotle serves what featured in the chef’s latest tome, Vatch’s Thai Kitchen, but smaller snacks like chorizo con arepa (a corn cake with beef, and crab Rangoon. But there are also about two dozen spic- the company calls “food with integrity.” The fare is simple, with Tamarind’s very affordable prices (especially at lunch), you Colombian sausage). And for noncarnivores there are several ier, Szechuan-style standards like kung po shrimp, ma po tofu, basically tacos and big burritos: soft flour or crisp corn might as well let the man’s impeccably trained kitchen staff do hefty seafood platters, made to order. $$ and General Tso’s chicken. And there are a few imaginative new tortillas stuffed with chipotle-marinated steak or chicken the work for you. $$-$$$ items, like the intriguingly christened “Shrimp Lost in the Forest,” chunks, bolder shredded beef barbacoa, or herb-scented Bagels & Co. Singapore curried rice noodles, crispy shrimp with honey-glazed pork carnitas, all with choice of fresh garnishes. But these MIAMI SHORES 11064 Biscayne Blvd., 305-892-2435 walnuts, and Mongolian beef (with raw chilis and fresh Oriental bites contain no evil ingredients (transfats, artificial color/ While this place is often referred to as Guns & Bagels, one basil). Delivery is available for both lunch and dinner. $$ flavor, antibiotics, growth hormones). Additionally, all pork, Iron Sushi can’t actually buy a gun here. The nickname refers to its loca- plus a large and growing percentage of the grill’s beef and 9432 NE 2nd Ave. tion next to a firearms shop. But there’s a lot of other stuff Captain Jim’s Seafood poultry, is raised via humane and ecologically sustainable 305-754-0311 aside from bagels here, including a full range of sandwiches 12950 W. Dixie Hwy. methods. And the food, while not the authentic Mex street www.ironsushi.com and wraps. Breakfast time is busy time, with banana-walnut 305-892-2812 stuff dreams are made of, is darned tasty, too. $ With three Biscayne Corridor outlets (plus several branches pancakes especially popular. But what’s most important is This market/restaurant was garnering critical acclaim elsewhere in town), this mostly take-out mini chain is fast that this is one of the area’s few sources of the real, New even when eat-in dining was confined to a few Formica D.J.’s Diner becoming the Sushi Joint That Ate Miami. And why do York-style water bagel: crunchy outside, challengingly chewy tables in front of the fish counter, owing to the fresh- 12210 Biscayne Blvd., 305-893-5250 Miamians eat here? Not ambiance. There isn’t any. But when inside. Those puffy half-donuts most places pass off as ness of its seafood (much of it from Capt. Jim Hanson’s Located in a Best Western motel, this place, run by a Chinese- friends from the Pacific Northwest, where foodies know their bagels aren’t even contenders. $ own fishing boats, which supply many of Miami’s most American family, serves mostly basic American diner fare – burg- fish, tout the seafood’s freshness, we listen. And though the upscale eateries). Now there’s a casual but pleas- ers, sandwiches, about a dozen dinner entrées, fresh-baked apple bargain prices, and many menu items, are similar to those at Bamboche antly nautical side dining room with booths, and more pie, and, oddly, a whole section of Caesar salad variations. But it’s other fast-food sushi places, there are some surprisingly imag- 13408 Biscayne Blvd, 305-947-6339 recently added, a sushi bar stocked largely with flown- also a secret source for Chinese food, mostly chow mien/chop inative makis, like the Maharaja, featuring fried shrimp and Buried in a strip mall perpendicular to the Boulevard, Bamboche in Japanese fish just as pristine as the local catch. suey-type dishes, but also a few dishes such as eggplant with garlic drizzles of curry mayo. And where else will you find a stacked is worth the hunt on one of those head-splitting Saturdays, for a Whether it’s garlicky scampi (made with sweet Key sauce and ma po tofu that are a step up in authenticity. $-$$ sushi (five assorted makis) birthday cake? $-$$ Haitian specialty not found in many area restaurants: bouillon tet West shrimp), housemade smoked fish dip, grilled yel- cabrit, a soup packed with greens (like spinach, cabbage, cress, lowtail (or some more exotic local snapper, like hog or Hanna’s Gourmet Diner Village Café string beans) and root veggies that is reputed to be a miraculous mutton), perfectly tenderized cracked conch, or conch 13951 Biscayne Blvd., 305-947-2255 9540 NE 2nd Ave. hangover remedy. Along with bouillon, weekend specials include fritters (with just enough batter to bind the big chunks When Sia and Nicole Hemmati bought the Gourmet Diner from 305-757-6453; www.villagecaferestaurant.com more unusual dishes like fritay, fried street snacks. Haitian stan- of Bahamian shellfish), everything is deftly prepared retiring original owner Jean-Pierre Lejeune in the late 1990s, There’s an official Village Hall a few blocks up the road, but a dards (griot, tassot) are available daily, as are fresh-squeezed and bargain-priced. $$ they added “Hanna’s” to the name, but changed little else popular vote would probably proclaim Village Café the commu- juices, lattes, and almost two dozen desserts. $ about this retro-looking French/American diner, a north Miami- nity center of Miami Shores. Few residents can resist starting Casa Mia Trattoria Dade institution since 1983. Customers can get a cheese- the workday with unique breakfast treats like a pressed panini Bar-B-Que Beach Sports Bar & Grill 1950 NE 123rd St. burger or garlicky escargots, meatloaf in tomato sauce or boeuf of ham, Brie, and caramelized apples. Later locals gather over a 12599 Biscayne Blvd., 305-895-3141 305-899-2770 bourguignon in red wine sauce, iceberg lettuce and tomatoes, balsamic-dressed cranberry blue chicken salad (a grilled breast On Friday nights, there’s karaoke at this expansive eatery, though Tucked away, off to the side on the approach to the Broad or a mushroom and squid salad with garlic dressing. For oysters on romaine with gorgonzola, walnuts, and dried cranberries), from the décor -- mixing Wild West rusticity with Key West flip- Causeway and the beaches, this charming indoor/outdoor Rockefeller/tuna-melt couples from Venus and Mars, it remains pan-fried blue crab cakes with beurre blanc and crisp cayenne- flops dangling from the ceiling -- it’s hard to know whether to trattoria seems to attract mostly neighborhood regulars. the ideal dinner date destination. $$-$$$ fried onions, wonton-topped salmon Oriental, or homemade brush up your Jimmy Buffett medley or “Tumbling Tumbleweeds.” But even newcomers feel like regulars after about ten pasta. As for dessert, the pastry case speaks for village resi- There are specials the other six days of the week as well, minutes here, thanks to the staff’s genuinely Italian ebul- Here Comes the Sun dents: Let them eat (fresh-baked) cake! $-$$ from early-bird discounts to open-mike nights to kids-eat-free lience. The delightful Italian accents don’t hurt, either. As 2188 NE 123rd St. Tuesdays. But don’t forget the biggest draw: the barbecue, hon- for the menu offerings, they’re mostly classic comfort foods 305-893-5711 Côte Gourmet est stuff that has been low-temperature smoked for 12 to 14 with some contemporary items as well. Housemade pastas At this friendly natural foods establishment, one of Miami’s 9999 NE 2nd Ave., #112 hours till tender yet resilient. Ribs are meaty (except for the aptly are good enough that low-carb dieters should definitely first, there’s a full stock of vitamins and nutritional supple- 305-754-9012 named, bargain-priced “bucket of bones,” and while chopped temporarily fuhgeddaboudit, especially for the tender gnoc- ments. But the place’s hearty soups, large variety of entrées If every Miami neighborhood had a neighborhood restaurant pork may not totally satisfy North Carolina pulled pork purists, chi with pesto or better yet, delicate fagottini -- “beggar’s (including fresh fish and chicken as well as vegetarian selec- like this low-priced little French jewel, it’d be one fantastic nothing within a 1000-mile drive ever does. Biggest winners: suc- purses” stuffed with pears and cheese. $$ tions), lighter bites like miso burgers with secret “sun sauce” food town. The menu is mostly simple stuff: breakfast culent sliced brisket and delightfully juicy chicken. $$ (which would probably make old sneakers taste good), and croissants, crêpe, soups, sandwiches, salads, sweets, and Chéen-huyae daily specials are a tastier way to get healthy. An under-ten- a few more substantial specials like a Tunisian-style brik Burritos Grill Café 15400 Biscayne Blvd., 305-956-2808 buck early-bird dinner is popular with the former long-hair, (buttery phyllo pastry stuffed with tuna, onions, potatoes, 11717 Biscayne Blvd., 305-891-1041 Diners can get some of the usual Tex-Mex dishes at this now blue-hair, crowd. Frozen yogurt, fresh juices, and smooth- and tomatoes) with a mesclun side salad. But everything is www.burritosgrillcafe cute spot, if they must. But the specialty is Mayan-rooted ies complete the menu. $-$$ homemade, including all breads, and prepared with impec- Originally a friendly little 125th Street hole-in-the-wall that Yucatan cuisine. So why blow bucks on burritos when one cable ingredients, classic French technique, and meticulous garnered raves for its limited menu of terrifically tasty treats, can sample Caribbean Mexico’s most typical dish: cochinita Ichi attention to detail, down to the stylish plaid ribbons that hold Mario and Karina Manzanero’s café is now in more siz- pibil? It’s currently LA’s trendiest taco filling (and morning- 13488 Biscayne Blvd. together the café’s baguette sandwiches. $-$$ able and atmospheric quarters. But the friendly, family-run after hangover remedy). But that city couldn’t have a more 305-944-9334 (and kid-friendly) ambiance remains, as do the authentic authentically succulent version of the pickle-onion-topped Half sushi/sashimi, half cooked Japanese dishes, the Yucatan-style specialties. Standouts include poc-chuc, a pork marinated pork dish than Chéen’s – earthily aromatic menu is relatively small but covers most of the traditional NORTH MIAMI loin marinated in sour orange juice and topped with pickled from achiote, tangy from bitter oranges, meltingly tender favorites and a few surprises. Popular makis include the onions and chiltomate sauce (roasted tomato/chili); tacos al from slow cooking in a banana leaf wrap. To accompany, Dream (shrimp tempura, avocado, Japanese mayo, and Los Antojos pastor, stuffed with subtly smoky steak, onion, cilantro, and try a lime/soy/chili-spiced michelada, also authentically masago), the vegetarian Popeye spicy spinach roll, and the 11099 Biscayne Blvd.; 305-892-1411 pineapple; sinful deep-fried tacos dorados (like fat flautas); Mexican, and possibly the best thing that ever happened to If it’s Sunday, it must be sancocho de gallina, Colombia’s and signature burritos, including the Maya, filled with juicy dark beer. $$-$$$ Continued on page 52

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 51 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings food. Though Lime is now franchising, the chain’s concept is “fast either soup (hearty minestrone) or a salad (mixed greens, toma- Oishi Thai casual” rather than fast food – meaning nice enough for a night toes, cukes, brined olives, and pickled peppers) that’s a dinner 14841 Biscayne Blvd. Continued from page 51 out. It also means ingredients aren’t canned-type crapola. Seafood in itself. Rustic roadhouse ambiance, notably the red leather- 305-947-4338 tacos are about as exotic as the standard menu gets, but the mahi ette booths, add to Mama’s charm. $-$$ www.oishithai.com deep-fried Crispy, a riceless salmon and veggie roll. Among mahi for fish tacos comes fresh, never frozen, from a local supplier, At this stylish, dramatically minimalist Thai/sushi spot, the cooked items, there’s a large list of teriyakis, and a few and salsas are housemade daily. Niceties include low-carb tortillas Mario the Baker regular Thai and Japanese dishes are as good as anywhere dishes prepared with a different twist – panko-breaded for dieters and many Mexican beers for partiers. $ 250 NE 25th St. in town. But the way to go is the menu of specials, many pork or chicken katsu cutlets, for instance, that eschew the 305-891-7641 of which clearly reflect the young chef’s fanatic devotion standard sweet sauce for curry. $$ Little Havana www.mariothebakerpizza.com to fresh fish, as well as the time he spent in the kitchen of 12727 Biscayne Blvd. At this North Miami institution (opened in 1969) food is Knob: broiled miso-marinated black cod; rock shrimp tem- Jerusalem Market and Deli 305-899-9069 Italian-American, not Italian-Italian: spaghetti and meatballs, pura with creamy sauce; even Nobu Matsuhisa’s “new style 16275 Biscayne Blvd. www.littlehavanarestaurant.com lasagna, eggplant parmigiana, and hot or cold subs. No sashimi” (slightly surface-seared by drizzles of hot olive and 305-948-9080 In addition to white-tablecoth ambiance that’s several steps up in ele- imported buffala, arugula, or other chichi stuff on the New sesame oil). Formerly all Japanese-influenced, the specials Specialties like shawarma, spinach pies, kebabs, hum- gance from the majority of neighborhood eateries, this place features York-style medium-thin-crusted pizzas; the top topping here menu now includes some Thai-inspired creations, too, such mus, and kibbeh (a savory mix of ground lamb and bulgur, live Latin entertainment and dancing, making it a good choice when is the savory housemade sausage. And no one leaves with- as veal massaman curry, Chilean sea bass curry, and sizzling arguably the world’s most interesting meatball) are native diners want a night out, not just a meal. It’s also a good choice for out garlic rolls, awash in warm parsley oil and smashed gar- filet mignon with basil sauce. $$$-$$$$ to many Middle East countries, but when a Lebanese diners who don’t speak Spanish, but don’t worry about authenticity. lic ($4 a dozen, $3 per half-dozen, which won’t even last the chef/owner, like this eatery’s Sam Elzoor, is at the helm, Classic Cuban home-style dishes like mojo-marinated lechon asado, ride home). New branches are now open in Miami’s Midtown La Paloma you can expect extraordinary refinement. There are elabo- topped with onions, and juicy ropa vieja are translated on the menu, neighborhood and in North Bay Village. $ 10999 Biscayne Blvd. rate daily specials here, like lemon chicken or stuffed cab- not the plate, and fancier creations like pork filet in tangy tamarind 305-891-0505 bage with a variety of sides, but even a common falafel sauce seem universal crowd-pleasers. $$$ The Melting Pot Step into La Paloma and you’ll be stepping back in time, sandwich is special when the pita is also stuffed with 15700 Biscayne Blvd. circa 1957. Adorned with antiques (some even real) and housemade cabbage and onion salads, plus unusually Maleewan Thai & Sushi 305-947-2228 chandeliers, the over-the-top plush décor was the American rich and tart tahina. For home cooks, there’s also a lim- 2224 NE 123rd St. www.meltingpot.com fine-dining ideal – half a century ago (though actually the ited selection of imported spices and staples. $-$$ 305-895-0393 For 1950s and 1960s college students, fondue pots were place only dates from the 1970s). Cuisine is similarly retro- Redecorated (tasteful bamboo-matted walls, silk flowers) since the standard dorm accessories. These days, however, branches luxe: old-fashioned upscale steaks, chops, and lobster, plus Le Griot de Madame John days — many days — this space was occupied by the kosher sushi of this chain (originating in Maitland, Florida, in 1975) are fancier Continental fare. If you have a yen for chateaubriand, 975 NE 125th St. spot Tani Guchi’s Place, Maleewan is now a cozy, neighborly nook generally the only places to go for this blast-from-the-past duck a l’orange, oysters Rockefeller, French onion soup, 305-892-9333 at which to enjoy all the standard Japanese and Thai selections. eating experience. Fondues are available à la carte or as full trout almondine, wiener schnitzel, and peach Melba, it’s the When Madame moved her base of operations from her Little Cooked sushi is the strong suit here, particularly the signature dip-it-yourself meals. Start with a wine-enriched four-cheese only place in town that can deliver them all. A huge wine list Haiti home to a real restaurant (though a very informal one, mammoth-size Maleewan roll, given zing by pickled Japanese fondue; proceed to an entrée with choice of meat or sea- fuels the fantasy. $$$$ and still mostly take-out), she began offering numerous tradi- squash and savor by a crispy yellowtail tempura topping. If you’re food, plus choice of cooking potion – herbed wine, bouillon, tional Haitian dishes, including jerked beef or goat tassot and craving more creative fare, check out the handwritten specials or oil; finish with fruits and cakes dipped in your favorite Paquito’s an impressive poisson gros sel (a whole fish rubbed with salt board on your way in. $$ melted chocolate. Fondue etiquette dictates that diners who 16265 Biscayne Blvd. before poaching with various veggies and spices). But the dish drop a skewer in the pot must kiss all other table compan- 305-947-5027 that still packs the place is the griot: marinated pork chunks Mama Jennie’s ions, so go with those you love. $$$ From the outside, this strip-mall Mexican eatery couldn’t be simmered and then fried till they’re moistly tender inside, crisp 11720 NE 2nd Ave. easier to overlook. Inside, however, its festivity is impossible and intensely flavored outside. $ 305-757-3627 North One 10 to resist. Every inch of wall space seems to be covered with For more than 35 years this beloved red-sauce joint has been 11052 Biscayne Blvd. South of the Border knickknacks. And if the kitschy décor alone Lime Fresh Mexican Grill drawing students and other starvation-budget diners with pro- 305-893-4211 doesn’t cheer you, the quickly arriving basket of fresh (not 14831 Biscayne Blvd. digious portions of lasagna, spaghetti and meatballs (the latter www.northone10.com packaged) taco chips, or the mariachi band, or the knockout 305-949-8800 savory yet light-textured), veal marsala topped with a mountain For most chefs a Miami-to-Manhattan move is generally margaritas will. Food ranges from Tex-Mex burritos and a party- Like its South Beach predecessor, this Lime was an instant hit, as of mushrooms, and other Italian-American belly-busters. All considered one of those offers you can’t refuse. But after size fajita platter to authentic Mexican moles and harder-to-find much for being a hip hangout as for its carefully crafted Tex-Mex pasta or meat entrées come with oil-drenched garlic rolls and helming several NYC restaurants for China Grill Management, traditional preparations like albóndigas – spicy, ultra-savory the homegrown married team of chef Dewey and sommelier meatballs. $$-$$$ Dale LoSasso returned to do their own thing in their own ORIGINAL BAVARIAN neighborhood. The menu is “creative comfort food”: a shrimp Pasha’s waffle with basil butter; “steak and eggs” (a grilled NY strip 14871 Biscayne Blvd. BIER GARTEN with truffled goat cheese frittata, herb demiglace, and hash 786-923-2323 OPEN DAILY FROM 5:00PM TO 11:00PM browns); a stone crab hot dog the chef invented for a Super www.pashas.com FRIDAY &SATURDAY TO MIDNIGHT Bowl party. The award-winning wine list inspires playfully (See Miami: Brickell / Downtown listing) themed pairing events like an Italian food/wine “Godfather” dinner. But it’s not South Beach, so prices are reasonable, Paul Bakery Café and parking is free. $$$-$$$$ 14861 Biscayne Blvd. 305-940-4443 Nuvo Kafe www.paulusa.com 13152 W. Dixie Hwy. From one rural shop in 1889, the French bakery known 305-892-1441 simply as Paul has grown to a worldwide chain, which for- Though the neighborhood is decidedly ungentrified, the interior tunately chose to open its first U.S. outlet in our town. One of this café is an oasis of cultivated Caribbean cool and subtly bite of the crusty peasant loaf, the olive-studded fougasse, sophisticated global fare. Haitian-born, Montreal-schooled chef or another of the signature artisan breads transports you Ivan Dorval formerly cooked at the Oasis Café in Miami Beach, right back to France. As authentic as the boulangerie as well as the Delano, and the varied background is reflected breads are, the patisserie items like flan normande (a in cuisine that’s chiefly creative Caribbean but with influences buttery-crusted, almond-topped apple-and-custard tart) from the Middle East, Asia, Greece, and Italy. Homemade, are just as evocative. For eat-in diners, quite continental TEL: 305-754-8002 www.schnitzelhausmiami.com health-oriented dishes include velvety ginger pumpkin bisque, soups, salads, and sandwiches are equally and dependably unusually refined conch fritters (light batter, monster chunks of French. $$ 1085 N.E. 79th Street/Causeway, Miami, FL 33138 conch), West Indies crab cakes with citrus aioli, and a signature lavish, but only slightly sinful, Citadel Raw Fruit Pie. $$-$$$ Continued on page 53

52 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings with a mountain of tempura flakes; the spicy/sweet sauce- reference pretty much an insider’s joke. Since opening For basic diners there are burgers and hot dogs. Entry drenched Hawaiian King Crab, containing unprecedented several years ago, the restaurant itself has been one of is directly from 163rd Street, not through the main park Continued from page 52 ingredients like tomatoes, green peppers, and pineapple. To our town’s best-kept secrets. But the perfectionist chef/ entrance. No admission fee. $ drink there are boutique wines, artisan sakes, and cocktails owner’s concentration on quality and freshness of ingre- Sara’s as exotic as the cuisine. $$$-$$$$ dients has made Zipang the pick of sushi cognoscenti like China Restaurant 2214 NE 123rd St. Loews’s executive chef Marc Ehrler, who has named the 178 NE 167th St. 305-891-3312 Tokyo Bowl unpretentious place his favorite Miami eatery, while admit- 305-947-6549 www.saraskosherpizza.com 12295 Biscayne Blvd. ting the obvious: “Nobody knows it.” $$-$$$ When you have a yen for the Americanized Chinese fusion While this mainly vegetarian kosher place is best known for its 305-892-9400 dishes you grew up with, all the purist regional Chinese pizza (New York-style medium crust or thick-crusted Sicilian, This fast-food drive-thru (unexpectedly serene inside) is cuisine in the world won’t scratch the itch. So the menu topped with veggies and/or “meat buster” imitation meats), it’s named for its feature item, big budget-priced bowls of rice NORTH MIAMI BEACH here, containing every authentically inauthentic Chinese- also offers a full range of breakfast/lunch/dinner vegetarian or noodles topped with cooked Japanese-style items like American classic you could name, is just the ticket when cuisine of all nations, with many dairy and seafood items too. teriyaki fish (fresh fish sautéed with vegetables), curried Bamboo Garden nostalgia strikes – from simple egg rolls to pressed Admittedly the cutesie names of many items – baygels, berger- chicken and veggies, spicy shrimp, or gyoza dumplings in 1232 NE 163rd St. almond duck (majorly breaded boneless chunks, with rbite, Cezarrrr salad, hammm, meat-a-ball, schmopperrr – may tangy sauce. There’s also an all-you-can-eat deal – sushi 305-945-1722 comfortingly thick gravy). $-$$ cause queasiness. But the schmopperrr itself is one helluva (individual nigiri or maki rolls) plus tempura, teriyaki, and Big enough for a banquet (up to 300 guests), this high-octane veggie burger. $-$$ other cooked items for $14; three bucks more for sashimi veteran is many diners’ favorite on the 163rd/167th Christine’s Roti Shop instead of sushi. $-$$ Street “Chinatown” strip because of its superior décor. 16721 NE 6th Ave. Scorch Grillhouse and Wine Bar But the menu also offers well-prepared, authentic 305-770-0434 13750 Biscayne Blvd. Venezia Pizza and Café dishes like peppery black bean clams, sautéed mustard Wraps are for wimps. At this small shop run by Christine 305-949-5588 13452 Biscayne Blvd. greens, and steamed whole fish with ginger and scal- Gouvela, originally from British Guyana, the wrapper is a far www.scorchgrillhouse.com 305-940-1808 lions, plus Chinese-American egg foo young. Default more substantial and tasty roti, a Caribbean mega-crepe Though some food folks were initially exasperated when No frozen pizza crusts or watery mozzarella here. No spicing is mild even in Szechuan dishes marked with made from chickpea flour. Most popular filling for the flat- yet another Latin-influenced grill replaced one of our area’s imported designer ingredients either. The pies are New red-chili icons, but don’t worry; realizing some like it bread is probably jerk chicken, bone-in pieces in a spiced few Vietnamese restaurants, it’s hard to bear a grudge at York-style, but the dough is made fresh daily, and the hot, the chefs will customize spiciness to heroic heat stew of potatoes, cabbage, carrots, onions, and more chick- a friendly, casual neighborhood place that offers monster cheese is Grande (from Wisconsin, considered America’s levels upon request. $$ peas. But there are about a dozen other curries to choose ten-ounce char-grilled burgers, with potatoes or salad, for finest pizza topper). Also on the menu are Italian-American from, including beef, goat, conch, shrimp, trout, and duck. $8.50; steaks, plus a side and a sauce or veg topper, for pastas, a large selection of hot an cold subs, simple sal- Blue Marlin Fish House Take-out packages of plain roti are also available; they trans- nine bucks at lunch, $15 to $18.75 (the menu’s top price) ads, and a few new protein adds – grilled chicken breast, 2500 NE 163rd St. form myriad leftovers into tasty, portable lunches. $ at night; and three-dollar glasses of decent house wine. fried fish, or a steak. $-$$ 305-957-8822 Many other grilled meat and seafood items are also offered, Located inside Oleta River State Park, this casual outdoor El Gran Inka plus pastas, salads, gooey desserts, and specials (events as Wong’s Chinese Restaurant eatery (which is covered, but otherwise open-air) is a rare 3155 NE 163rd St. well as food). $-$$ 12420 Biscayne Blvd. surprise for nature lovers, especially since an eager-to- 305-940-4910 305-891-4313 please young couple took over the daytime-only conces- www.graninka.com Steve’s Pizza This old-timer’s menu reads like a textbook on how to please sion, upgrading the menu, at the start of 2008. The fea- Somehow, when setting off to try Key Biscayne restau- 12101 Biscayne Blvd. everyone, with food ranging from traditional Chinese to tured item is still the house-smoked fish this historic venue rants (like Miami’s original Gran Inka), we never make it 305-891-0202 Chinese-American to just plain American. Appetizers include first started producing in 1938 – three varieties (salmon, past Jimbo’s. So luckily, the newer branch of this upscale At the end of a debauched night of excess, some paper-thin honey garlic chicken wings or Buffalo wings. A crab-claw mahi mahi, and the signature blue marlin), available in a Peruvian eatery offers the same menu. Though diners will designer pizza with wisps of smoked salmon (or similar fluff) starter comes with choice of pork fried rice or French fries. sampler, salads, sandwiches/wraps, or a delightfully mild find ceviches, a hefty fried-seafood jalea, and Peru’s other doesn’t do the trick. Open till 3:00 or 4:00 a.m., Steve’s has, Seafood lovers can get shrimp chop suey, or salty pep- smoked fish dip that may be Miami’s best. But the smoke- expected traditional specialties, all presented far more ele- since 1974, been serving the kind of comforting, retro pizzas per shrimp (authentically shell-on). And snowbirds will be house now also turns out ribs and delectable brisket. Other gantly than most in town (notably a picture-perfect causa people crave at that hour. As in Brooklyn, tomato sauce is pleased to find a number of dishes that are mainstays of new additions include roasted red pepper hummus, crab con camarones, mashed potatoes layered with shrimp), sweet, with strong oregano flavor. Mozzarella is applied with Manhattan Szechuan menus but not common in Miami: cold cakes, a delightfully light homemade Key lime chiffon pie, abandon. Toppings are stuff that give strength: pepperoni, sesame noodles, Hunan chicken, twice-cooked pork, Lake daily specials, and on weekends, fish fries (with live music). Continued on page 54 sausage, meatballs, onions, and peppers. $ Tung Ting shrimp, and peppery kung po squid. $$ Sun City Café Woody’s Famous Steak Sandwich 15400 Biscayne Blvd. 13105 Biscayne Blvd. 305-940-6955 305-891-1451 Super-stuffed crêpes, made to order from scratch, are the The griddle has been fired up since 1954 at this indie fast- main specialty here – some sweet (the Banana Split: fresh food joint, and new owners have done little to change the strawberries, sliced bananas, candied walnuts, ice cream, time-tested formula except to stretch operating hours into the and Nutella or dulce de leche), some savory (the Sun night and expand its classic griddled-or-fried-things menu to City Steak: beef, mushrooms, onions, red peppers, Swiss include a few health-conscious touches like Caesar salad, plus cheese, and A1 sauce). But there’s also a smaller selection a note proclaiming their oils are free of trans fats. Otherwise the of custom-crafted wraps, salads, sandwiches, and sides, famous steak sandwich is still a traditional Philly – thin-sliced plus smoothies, coffee drinks, even beer or wine. Free Wi-Fi beef, cheese, and onions on a buttered Italian roll (with tasty encourages long, lingering lunches. $ housemade sour cream/horseradish sauce served on the side so as not to offend purists). Extras like mushrooms are Sushi House possible, not imposed. Drippin’ good burgers, too. And unlike 15911 Biscayne Blvd. MacChain addicts, patrons here can order a cold beer with the 305-947-6002 good grease. $-$$ In terms of décor drama, this sushi spot seems to have taken its cue from Philippe Starck: Delano-like sheer floor-to- Zipang ceiling drapes, for starters. The sushi list, too, is over the top, 14316 Biscayne Blvd. featuring monster makis: the Cubbie Comfort (spicy tuna, 305-919-8844 soft-shell crab, shrimp and eel tempura, plus avocado, jala- It’s appropriate that the name of this small strip-mall sushi peños, and cilantro, topped with not one but three sauces: spot refers to Japan’s first and only sparkling sake – some- wasabi, teriyaki, and spicy mayo); the Volcano, topped thing most Americans have never heard of, making the

March 2009 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com 53 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings Iron Sushi the dining room entrance. There’s also a better-than-aver- it’s hard to get excited about yet another all-you-can-eat 16350 W. Dixie Hwy. age selection of seasonal Chinese veggies. The menu is meat spread. But Matador offers far more for the money Continued from page 53 305-945-2244 extensive, but the best ordering strategy, since the place than most. One dinner price ($24.95, $27.95 weekends) (See Miami Shores listing) is usually packed with Asians, is to see what looks good includes a salad bar of more than 30 items, unlimited the contemporary Peruvian fusion creations are unique. on nearby tables, and point. Servers will also steer you to grilled proteins (many cuts of beef, sausages, chicken, Especially recommended are two dishes adapted from JC Food the good stuff, once you convince them you’re not a chop pork, assorted veggies, and even fish upon request), recipes by Peru’s influential nikkei (Japanese/Creole) chef 1242 NE 163rd St. suey kinda person. $$ crunchy steak fries, a dessert (typically charged extra Rosita Yimura: an exquisite, delicately sauced tiradito de 305-956-5677 elsewhere), and even more fun, a bottle of quite quaf- corvina, and for those with no fear of cholesterol, pulpo de Jumbo’s regular menu offers a large percentage of hard- Laurenzo’s Market Café fable wine per person. $$$ oliva (octopus topped with rich olive sauce). $$$-$$$$ to-find traditional Chinese home-cooking specialties 16385 W. Dixie Hwy. (many using fresh and preserved Asian vegetables): pork 305-945-6381 Panya Thai Hiro Japanese Restaurant with bitter melon, beef with sour cabbage, chicken with www.laurenzosmarket.com 520 NE 167th St. 3007 NE 163rd St., 305-948-3687 mustard green, cellophane noodle with mixed-vegetable It’s just a small area blocked off by grocery shelves, buried 305-945-8566 One of Miami’s first sushi restaurants, Hiro retains an casserole. Still, most diners come for dim sum, a huge between the wines and the fridge counters – no potted palms, Unlike authentic Chinese cuisine, there’s no shortage amusing retro-glam feel, an extensive menu of both sushi selection served at all hours. These small plates include and next-to-no service in this cafeteria-style snack space. But of genuine Thai food in and around Miami. But Panya’s and cooked Japanese food, and late hours that make it chewy rice noodle rolls filled with shrimp or beef, leek when negotiating this international gourmet market’s packed chef/owner, a Bangkok native, offers numerous regional a perennially popular snack stop after a hard night at the dumplings, crisp-fried stuffed taro balls, savory pork- shelves and crowds has depleted your energies, it’s a handy and/or rare dishes not found elsewhere. Plus he doesn’t area’s movie multiplexes (or strip clubs). The sushi menu studded turnip cake, pork/peanut congee, custard crois- place to refuel with eggplant parmesan and similar Italian- automatically curtail the heat or sweetness levels to has few surprises, but quality is reliable. Most exceptional sants, and for the brave, steamed chicken feet. $$ American classics, steam-tabled but housemade from old fam- please Americans. Among the most intriguing: moo khem are the nicely priced yakitori, skewers of succulently soy- ily recipes. Just a few spoonfuls of Wednesday’s hearty pasta phad wan (chewy deep-fried seasoned pork strips with glazed and grilled meat, fish, and vegetables; the unusu- Kyung Ju fagiole, one of the daily soup specials, could keep a person fiery tamarind dip, accompanied by crisp green papaya ally large variety available of the last makes this place a 400 NE 167th St. shopping for hours. $-$$ salad, a study in sour/sweet/savory balance); broad rice good choice for vegetarians. $$ 305-947-3838 noodles stir-fried with eye-opening chili/garlic sauce and Star of the show at this long-lived Korean restaurant Lemon Fizz fresh Thai basil; and chili-topped Diamond Duck in tangy Hiro’s Sushi Express (one of only a handful in Miami-Dade County) is bulgogi. 16310 W. Dixie Hwy. tamarind sauce. $$-$$$ 17048 W. Dixie Hwy., 305-949-0776 The name translates as “fire meat,” but isn’t a refer- 305-949-6599 Tiny, true, but there’s more than just sushi at this mostly take- ence to Koreans’ love of hot chilis. Rather it refers to www.lemon-fizz.com PK Oriental Mart out spin-off of the pioneering Hiro. Makis are the mainstay Korean-style barbecue, which is really not barbecued but Like wraps? Then you’ll love this Middle Eastern café’s 255 NE 167th St. (standard stuff like California rolls, more complex creations like quickly grilled after long marination in a mix of soy sauce, version made with saj, a circular Syrian flatbread similar 305-654-9646 multi-veg futomaki, and a few unexpected treats like a spicy sesame, sugar, garlic, and more. Lovers of fiery food can to pita but much thinner, moister, and all-around better. While there are three other sizable Asian markets on Crunch & Caliente maki), available à la carte or in value-priced customize with dipping sauces, or the eatery’s many little Upon order, diners can watch the chef custom-cook their this strip between I-95 and Biscayne Boulevard, PK individual and party combo platters. But there are also bento banchan (included side dishes, some mild, others mouth- saj (on a scorching-hot, flying-saucer metal dome of the has the only prepared-food counter, serving authentic boxes featuring tempura, yakitori skewers, teriyaki, stir-fried veg- searing). Pa jun, a crispy egg/scallion-based pancake, is same name), then roll the beautifully surface-blistered Chinatown barbecue, with appropriate dipping sauces gies, and udon noodles. Another branch is now open in Miami’s a crowd-pleasing starter. And if the unfamiliarity seems bread around one of 27 stuffings, including za’atar and included. Weekends bring the biggest selection, includ- Upper Eastside. $ too scary altogether, there’s a selection of Chinese food. EVOO, brined olives and labneh (creamy yogurt cheese), ing barbecued ribs and pa pei duck (roasted, then deep- $$-$$$ falafel, steak, even dessert fillings like strawberries and fried till extra crisp and nearly free of subcutaneous Hiro’s Yakko-San Nutella. Also available: soups, salads, and substantial fat). Available every day are juicy, soy-marinated roast 17040 W. Dixie Hwy., 305-947-0064 Kebab Indian Restaurant globally topped rice bowls, plus fresh fruit juices and chickens, roast pork strips, crispy pork, and whole roast After sushi chefs close up their own restaurants for the 514 NE 167th St. smoothies. $ ducks – hanging, as tradition dictates, beaks and all. night, many come here for a bite of something different. 305-940-6309 But no worries; a counterperson will chop your purchase The specialty is Japanese home cooking, served in graz- Since the 1980s this restaurant, located in an unatmo- Little Saiwwgon into bite-size, beakless pieces. $ ing portions so diners can enjoy a wide variety of the spheric mini strip mall but surprisingly romantic inside 16752 N. Miami Ave. unusual dishes offered. Standard sushi isn’t missed when (especially if you grab one of the exotically draped booths) 305-653-3377 Roasters & Toasters glistening-fresh strips of raw tuna can be had in maguro has been a popular destination for reasonably priced This is Miami’s oldest traditional Vietnamese restaurant, 18515 NE 18th Ave. nuta – mixed with scallions and dressed with habit-forming north Indian fare. Kormas are properly soothing and but it’s still packed most weekend nights. So even the 305-830-3354 honey-miso mustard sauce. Dishes depend on the market, vindaloos are satisfactorily searing, but the kitchen will place’s biggest negative – its hole-in-the-wall atmosphere, Attention ex-New Yorkers: Is your idea of food pornogra- but other favorites include goma ae (wilted spinach, chilled adjust seasonings upon request. They aim to please. Food not encouraging of lingering visits – becomes a plus since phy one of the Carnegie Deli’s mile-high pastrami sand- and dressed in sesame sauce), garlic stem and beef (mild arrives unusually fast for an Indian eatery, too. $$ it ensures fast turnover. Chef/owner Lily Tao is typically wiches? Well, Roasters will dwarf them. Even a mouth young shoots flash-fried with tender steak bits), or perhaps in the kitchen, crafting green papaya salad, flavorful beef like Angelina Jolie’s couldn’t fit around a “Carnegie-style” just-caught grouper with hot/sweet/tangy chili sauce. Open King Buffet noodle pho (served with greens, herbs, and condiments monster containing, according to the menu, a full pound till around 3:00 a.m. $$ 316 NE 167th St. that make it not just a soup but a whole ceremony), and of succulent meat (really 1.4 pounds; we weighed it), for 305-940-8668 many other Vietnamese classics. The menu is humon- a mere 15 bucks. All the other Jewish deli classics are Heelsha In this restaurant’s parking lot, midday on Sundays, the colorful gous. $-$$ here too, including just-sour-enough pickles, just-sweet- 1550 NE 164th St., 305-919-8393 display of vivid pinks, greens, and blues worn by myriad families enough slaw, silky hand-sliced nova or lox, truly red-rare www.heelsha.com arriving for dinner in matching going-to-church outfits is equaled Mary Ann Bakery roast beef, and the cutest two-bite mini-potato pancakes If unusual Bangladeshi dishes like fiery pumpkin patey only by the eye-poppingly dyed shrimp chips and desserts dis- 1284 NE 163rd St. ever — eight per order, served with sour cream and (cooked with onion, green pepper, and pickled mango) played inside on the buffet table. Though there’s an à la carte 305-945-0333 applesauce. $$ or Heelsha curry (succulently spiced hilsa, Bangladesh’s menu, the draw here is the 100-item (according to advertise- Don’t be unduly alarmed by the American birthday cakes sweet-fleshed national fish) seem familiar, it’s because ments) all-you-can-eat spread of dishes that are mostly Chinese, in the window. At this small Chinese bakery the real finds Sang’s Chinese Restaurant chef/owner Bithi Begum and her husband Tipu Raman with some American input. It’s steam-table stuff, but the price is are the Chinatown-style baked buns and other savory 1925 NE 163rd St. once served such fare at the critically acclaimed Renaisa. right and then some: $5.95 for lunch, $8.95 for dinner. $-$$ pastries, filled with roast pork, bean sauce, and curried 305-947-7076 Their new menu’s mix-and-match option also allows din- ground beef. Prices are under a buck, making them an Open late (12:30 a.m. most nights) since 1990, ers to pair their choice of meat, poultry, fish, or vegetable King Palace exotic alternative to fast-food dollar meals. There’s one Sang’s has an owner who previously cooked in NYC’s with more than a dozen regional sauces, from familiar 330 NE 167th St. table for eat-in snackers. $ Chinatown, and three menus. The pink menu is Indian styles to exotica like satkara, flavored with a 305-949-2339 Americanized Chinese food, from chop suey to honey Bangladeshi citrus reminiscent of sour orange. Early-bird The specialties here are authentic Chinatown-style barbe- Matador Argentinean Steakhouse garlic chicken. The white menu permits the chef to dinners (5:00 to 6:30 p.m.) are a bargain, as some dishes cue (whole ducks, roast pork strips, and more, displayed 3207 NE 163rd St. are almost half-price. Lunch is served weekends only in a glass case by the door), and fresh seafood dishes, 305-944-6001 Continued on page 55 except by reservation, so call ahead. $$-$$$ the best made with the live fish swimming in two tanks by With Latin parilla places spreading here as fast as kudzu,

54 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009 DINING GUIDE

Restaurant Listings macaroni in a Fris vodka sauce with mushrooms, scal- with those impressive credentials, Fredel and his wife launched Pilar (named for Hemingway’s boat) aiming to Continued from page 54 AVENTURA / MIAMI GARDENS lions, and parmesan. The famous dessert soufflé’s flavor changes daily, but it always did. $$$$$ prove that top restaurants can be affordable. Consider Anthony’s Coal-Fired Pizza it now proven. Floribbean-style seafood is the specialty, show off his authentic Chinese fare: salt and pepper 17901 Biscayne Blvd. Il Migliore dishes fresh hearts of palm slaw and Caribbean curry prawns, rich beef/turnip casserole, tender salt-baked 305-830-2625 2576 NE Miami Gardens Dr., 305-792-2902 sauce, rock shrimp spring rolls with sweet soy glaze, and chicken, even esoterica like abalone with sea cucum- www.anthonyscoalfiredpizza.com Reminiscent of an intimate Tuscan villa, chef Neal yellowtail snapper with tomato-herb vinaigrette and a ber. The extensive third menu offers dim sum, served The last four digits of the phone number actually spell Cooper’s attractive trattoria gets the food right, as well potato/leek croqueta. Don’t let the strip-mall location fool until 4:00 p.m. A limited live tank allows seasonal sea- “COAL.” And that’s what it’s all about here -- a coal- as the ambiance. As in Italy, dishes rely on impeccable you. The restaurant itself is elegant. $$-$$$ food dishes like lobster with ginger and scallion. More fired oven (like that at Lombardi’s, Patsy’s, John’s, or ingredients and straightforward recipes that don’t over- recently installed: a Chinese barbecue case, displaying Grimaldi’s in New York) producing the intense 800-degree complicate, cover up, or otherwise muck about with Pizza Roma savory items like crispy pork with crackling attached. heat to turn out, in a mere three or four minutes, a pie that perfection. Fresh fettuccine with white truffle oil 19090 NE 29th Ave. $$$ with the classic thin, crisp-bottomed, beautifully char- and mixed wild mushrooms needs nothing else. Neither 305-937-4462 bubbled crust that fans of the above legendary pizzerias does the signature Pollo Al Mattone, marinated in herbs Despite its name, this homey hidden eatery serves not Shing Wang Vegetarian, Icee & Tea House crave -- at any cost. Expect neither bargain-chain prices, a and cooked under a brick, require pretentious fancifica- Rome’s wood-cooked, crunchy-crusted pizzas but New 237 NE 167th St. huge selection of toppings (these aren’t the kind of clunky tion. And even low-carb dieters happily go to hell in a York-style pies with medium-thick crusts pliable enough to 305-654-4008 crusts you overload), nor much else on the menu except hand basket when faced with a mound of potatoes alla fold in half for neat street eating. Unlike chains, though, this www.shingwangrestaurant.com a hefty salad and some onion-topped chicken wings that Toscana, fried herb-sprinkled French fries. Located west indie is accommodating, so if you want your crust thin and At this unique Taiwanese eatery, run by a trio of Taipei- are also coal-oven tasty. Anthony’s does just a few things, of Biscayne Boulevard in the Davis Plaza shopping mall, crisp, just ask. Also featured are Italian-American entrées trained female chefs, all seafood, poultry, and meats and does them right. $$ across from Ojus Elementary School. $$-$$$ like baked manicotti (that’s “mani-goat”, for those not from in the budget-priced entrées ($6.95) are mock – imita- NJ) big enough to share, and sub sandwiches, here called tions made from wheat gluten, tofu, and vegetables. But Bella Luna Mahogany Grille “bullets,” to put you in a Sopranos frame of mind. The neigh- don’t mock it till you try the quite beefy pepper steak, or 19575 Biscayne Blvd. Aventura Mall , 2190 NW 183rd St. borhood friendliness extends to kids, and there’s a TV, plus smokin’ duck, with slices that mimic the charcuterie item 305-792-9330 305-626-8100 coolers of beer and plonk, for sports fans. $$ down to convincing faux fat. Other main dishes feature www.bellalunaaventura.com Formerly Ruby and Jean’s Soul Food Cuisine, a popular recognizable veggies or noodles, including appealingly If the menu here looks familiar, it should. It’s identi- but strictly neighborhood cafeteria, Mahogany Grille has The Soup Man chewy curried chow fun. As for the rest of the name: icee cal to that at the Upper Eastside’s Luna Café and, drawn critical raves — and an international as well as local 20475 Biscayne Blvd. #G-8 is shaved ice, an over-the-top dessert that’s a sort of a with minor variations, at all the rest of Tom Billante’s clientele — since retired major league outfielder Andre 305-466-9033 slurpee sundae, with toppings that vary from the familiar eateries (Rosalia, Villaggio, Carpaccio), right down to Dawson and his brother Vincent Brown acquired the place The real soup man behind this franchise is Al Yeganeh, (fresh fruits) to the weird (grass jelly, sweet corn, kidney the typeface. But no argument from here. In a mall – a in early 2007. The diner décor is gone, replaced by white an antisocial Manhattan restaurant proprietor made beans, rice balls, chocolate pudding). And the bubble tea setting more accustomed to food court, steam-tabled tablecloths and, naturally, mahogany. The food is a sort notorious, on a Seinfeld episode, as “the soup Nazi.” On is a must-not-miss. Using housemade syrup (as opposed stuff – dishes like carpaccio al salmone (crudo, with of trendy yet traditional soul fusion, heaping platters from the menu: ten different premium soups each day (from to most establishments’ store-bought stuff), the cold, portobellos, capers, parmesan slices, and lemon/toma- several African diaspora regions: Carolina Low Country a rotating list of about 50). The selection is carefully refreshing boba comes in numerous flavors (mango, taro, to dressing) and linguine carbonara (in creamy sauce (buttery cheese grits with shrimp, sausage, and cream balanced among meat/poultry-based and vegetarian; even actual tea), all supplemented with signature black with pancetta and shallots) are a breath of fresh, albeit gravy), the Caribbean (conch-packed fritters or salad), and clear and creamy (like the eatery’s signature shellfish- tapioca balls that, slurped through large-diameter straws, familiar, air. $$-$$$ the Old South (lightly buttermilk-battered fried chicken). packed lobster bisque); chilled and hot; familiar (chicken are a guaranteed giggle. $ The chicken is perhaps Miami’s best, made even better noodle) and exotic (mulligatawny). All soups come with Bourbon Steak with the Grille’s waffles. $$-$$$ gourmet bread, fruit, and imported chocolate. Also available Siam Square 19999 W. Country Club Dr. are salads, sandwiches, and wraps, à la carte or in soup-plus 54 NE 167th St. (Fairmont Hotel, Turnberry Resort) Pilar combos. $-$$ 305-944-9697 786-279-0658 20475 Biscayne Blvd. Open until 1:00 a.m. every day except Sunday (when is www.michaelmina.net 305-937-2777; www.pilarrestaurant.com Sushi Siam closes at midnight), this relatively new addition to North At Bourbon Steak, a venture in the exploding restaurant Chef/owner Scott Fredel previously worked for Norman 19575 Biscayne Blvd. Miami Beach’s “Chinatown” strip has become a popu- empire of chef Michael Mina, a multiple James Beard Van Aken and Mark Militello. He has been executive chef 305-932-8955 lar late-night gathering spot for chefs from other Asian award winner, steakhouse fare is just where the fare at Rumi, and cooked at NYC’s James Beard House. Armed (See Miami / Upper Eastside listing) restaurants. And why not? The food is fresh, nicely pre- starts. There are also Mina’s ingenious signature dishes, sented, and reasonably priced. The kitchen staff is willing like an elegant deconstructed lobster/baby vegetable pot to customize dishes upon request, and the serving staff is pie, a raw bar, and enough delectable vegetable/seafood reliably fast. Perhaps most important, karaoke equipment starters and sides (duck fat fries!) for noncarnivores to is in place when the mood strikes. $-$$ assemble a happy meal. But don’t neglect the steak — flavorful dry-aged Angus, 100-percent Wagyu American Tuna’s Raw Bar and Grille “Kobe,” swoonworthy grade A5 Japanese Kobe, and but- 17850 W. Dixie Hwy. ter-poached prime rib, all cooked to perfection under the 305-932-0630 supervision of on-site executive chef Andrew Rothschild, www.tunasrawbarandgrille.com formerly of the Forge, meaning he knows his beef. (Mina When Tuna’s moved in 2006 from the marina space it himself is absentee.) $$$$$ had occupied for more than 30 years, it lost its water- front location, its old-fashioned fish-house ambiance, Chef Allen’s and its outdoor deck. But now it has gained new owners, 19088 NE 29th Ave; 305-935-2900 a new name, a dazzling outdoor bar and dining area, www.chefallens.com and a newly impressive selection of raw-bar specialties: After 20 years of success in the same location, many cold-water oysters from the Northeast, plus Blue Points, chefs would coast on their backlog of tried-and-true dish- Malpecs, Island Creeks, and more. Traditional house es. And it’s doubtful that kindly Allen Susser would freak favorites remain, and the emphasis is still on fresh fish out his many regulars by eliminating from the menu the from local waters. Open daily till 2:00 a.m., the place Bahamian lobster and crab cakes (with tropical fruit can get rather festive after midnight, but since the kitch- chutney and vanilla beurre blanc). But lobster-lovers en is open till closing, Tuna’s draws a serious late-night will find that the 20th anniversary menus also offer new dining crowd, too. $$-$$$ excitements like tandoori-spiced rock lobster, along with what might be the ultimate mac’n’cheese: lobster crab

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56 Biscayne Times • www.BiscayneTimes.com March 2009