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Vol. XVI No.12 The University Community's Feature Paper March 27, 1995 9 P ea 4a Sf a a e n A a a ca
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I ...... by Doug Vescuso something like fourteen hundred miles of stairs in two flights of stairs, got a pass, back down two the Capitol. An amazing feat of engineering when flights, across the street, back up the damn stairs, Some people come to Washington D.C. to see the you think about it. Coming at the building from the and we found ourselves tired, achy, pissed off, and monuments, others come to visit the museums, mall we climbed the half billion steps. The steps are most of all having to pee. It seems that the builders and then there are the political geeks who come to designed for midgets, if they were normal steps it of the Capitol shot their load on stairs, because see our government in action. I came to would only require about two million steps.Upon there is only one toilet in the entire building. After Washington because I'm one of those geeks. My reaching the top we discovered that you can't enter following bizarre directions and traversing hun- mission while in Washington was to witness Uncle from that side. Naturally we couldn't just walk dreds of miles of stairs we came to the lone toilet. Newt and the Republican majority ram legislation around the top of the building. That would be too There were about sixty people on line ahead of us. down the spineless liberal scum's throats. Well, fucking simple; no we had to walk down all the Being on a tight schedule and having little toler- that and I'd heard a rumor that there's a bar in D.C. stairs, circle around the nce for waiting with a hang- that has over six hundred beer selections, but that building, and climb the over we simply sauntered is an entirely different story altogether. front stairs. We were over to the sink and convert- Bright and early one morning my roommate and more then a little ed it into a urinal. I set out for the Capitol building. Actually it wasn't queasy by the time we With our bladders emptied bright and early, in fact it was already afternoon; got to the front door. and hands filled with passes we had patronized the aforementioned bar the Once inside we tried to we proceeded to the House evening before and had done our best to try every get into the House gallery. The lady at the metal last beer. So we set out for the Capitol groggy and Gallery and were told detector informed us that annoyed, suffering from a low grade hangover, in by the guy at the door that we needed passes. "Well there is no talking, cheering, reading, applauding, search of rabid Republicans. The weather was where do you get passes?" I asked. "Go to the build- writing, or hat wearing(unless your religion compels absolutely beautiful. Unfortunately the last thing I ing next door and find your Representative's office. you to wear some strange sort of head gear) allowed wanted was fucking sunlight. To make matters Then just ask them for a pass. They always give in the gallery itself. "But I can still masturbate, worse we hadn't anticipated the temperature them out. If they don't stop by any Representative's right?" I asked. I don't think she got it. Once inside being in the eighties. Wearing jeans and heavy office and they will give you a pass." The kind, if we were witnessing a heated debate. Near as we shirts we were not only groggy but sweaty and somewhat less then bright man explained. "You could tell, they were debating whether or not to smelly to boot. We decided to purchase those stu- mean I can get a pass from any representative's starve children. There was much talk from the pid Washington D.C. T-shirts from a street vendor. office, and they never say no to a request?" I asked Democratic side about starving children. The At four for ten dollars even if they fall apart after incredulously. "Yes, that's right." He replied. "Well Republicans countered with the this is the two washings it's still a value. then, just let me in and pretend I walked all the way Democrats mess, they've been in charge for forty So there we were styling in our D.C. for Statehood up and down the stairs outside and got myself a stu- years, we're merely trying to clean things up by T-shirts and three dollar sunglasses heading for the pid pass." I pleaded most sincerely. "I'm sorry I starving these children. This went on for some time. Capitol. The Capitol is a remarkable building. It is can't do that." The sadistic prick explained. The strange thing was all of the representatives who made up almost entirely of stairways. There is After hiking down the stairs, across the block up got up and made impassioned continued on page 11
by John Guiffo Boy, am I lucky I came to my senses! nition for a number o' )dos webt done. All this confusion started when I saw a flyer the Ideas tossed around at that fateful senate meeting Recently, I found out that I was a member of the College Republicans had posted around campus were things such as free admission to COCA films, aristocracy, and boy-howdy, was I relieved. This of that said, "STOP ARISTOCRACY! STOP POLITY a discount at Colours Cafe, a free soda at senate course meant that I had nothing to worry about SENATE PERKS!" Being that I was the senator meetings, maybe some goddamn cookies. Some concerning the proposed budget cuts: I was a mem- who introduced the particular piece of legislation people felt this was dangerous. The Statesman dedi- ber of the aristocracy, and as such, I would be well they were referring to into the senate, I thought cated an entire editorial to it. Why, we might set up cared-for by the powers that be. "Of course," I they must have meant that I was an aristocrat. a system of stipends pretty soon, maybe a Stony thought, "it all makes sense now." Why hadn't I Man, was I ever wrong. I didn't take into account Brook equivalent of the House bank, perhaps we'd seen it before? I am a white male, and as a member Rule #1 pertaining to Republicans: every syllable even get post-senate meeting hookers! Who knew of that groovin' club of hepcats, I am entitled to cer- that finds its way out of their Gingrich-cum laced what we were capable of? If we weren't stopped, we tain societal privileges that others aren't. "Yes!" I mouths is a bold-faced lie. How could I forget that might soon be funneling out thousands of dollars was ecstatic, let me tell you. I promptly phoned my qh-so-important rule? Silly me. from the students pockets into ours, such clever new buddy, Governor George, and told him that I had introduced the aforementioned piece of legis- aristocrats were we! DAMN YOU, TOM MASSE! there must have been a mix-up with my birth reg- lation into the Polity Senate because of two reasons. You hath thwarted our evil plans once again, you istry. I told him who I was and that I had it from a The first and most important was the fact that I felt ever-vigilant champion of the downtrodden! good source, namely the University at Stony we needed to look into ways of battling the over- Well, the legislation is still alive and well, thank Brook's College Republicans, that I was an aristo- whelming amount of apathy that has entrenched you very much, and after some discussion, the com- crat. I asked him for those aristocrat-type things itself into every dirty little comer of this campus. No mittee decided to change the focus of the incentive that I had been denied growing up, y'know, well- one gives a shit and I wanted to look into ways of proposal. We are now looking at the feasibility of off, educated parents who were active in local helping people to give a shit. Basically, I wanted to making a Polity senate position a for-credit one. social circles, some compensatory money, and a car, offer an incentive or two for people to look into Perhaps Political Science credit. The members of the because, well...aristocrats must have cars. How the becoming a representative of their building or the committee felt this would be a more effective and hell else are we supposed to attend all those cool commuter college. There are a number of unfilled just means of compensation. It makes sense: I spend cotillions? At first there was silence. Then, do you seats for the residence halls and twice as many for more time on Polity-related matters than I do on know what happened next? The Governor hung up commuters. Perhaps there was something Polity some of my classes. Hopefully, the legislation will on me! I couldn't believe it! I would still be reeling could do to attract someone to this thankless job. I pass, and maybe next semester, who knows, barring from that crushing blow if it weren't for the fact introduced legislation that would form a committee any massive protestations or Administration take- that I had a realization then and there. An to look into the different possibilities we had avail- overs from the College Republicans or The Statesman epiphany, if you will. I realized that the College able to us. The second reason I proposed the now- and their tireless, activist leader, Tom Masse, we Republicans are a small, close-knit group of amaz- controversial perks legislation, was to recognize sen- might actually get something back from the system ingly goofy-looking social outcasts, who, when ate and judiciary members for jobs well done. Yes, we have put so much into. they are not masturbating profusely over air- there may be some senators who have been lax in And if it doesn't pass, I could always join the brushed photos of Newt Gingrich and Rush doing their jobs, but many of us are very dedicated to College Republicans, I hear they are getting in a Limbaugh in tight leather bondage gear, are most what we are doing. We work hard to do many things shipment of boudoir photos of Bob Dole and Jesse likely modeling various sizes of strap-on dildos on this campus. Our free time is often taken up with Helms and boy!, if that don't make my vaseline jus' painted red,white and blue while tangoing with Polity-related duties, and the majority of us meet the get all gooey and warm. each other and singing parts of the Contract With challenge of being a senator admirably. Perhaps we America to the tune of "Deutschland Uber-Alles". deserve SOMETHING for our efforts? A little recog- The Stony Brook Press page 2 Owe Say an Your$ee by Raoul Duke charged that the Republicans only wanted the Critics of Frils' plan charge that nullifying the debt amendment so that they could cut popular pro- would result in dire international troubles for the "Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what grams like welfare and public broadcasting with- US. Frils responds that any international repercus- they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when out taking the blame for it. "Sorry," they could say, sions could be easily handled with the right tech- adults tell the government what they want- and "we had to cut it--the amendment made us!" It's a nique. While foreign investors and countries might their kids pay for it." -Richard Lamm, 1985 moot point, though, since the amendment failed to threaten to never trade with the US again if they pass through the Senate. So here we are, deep in nullify the debt, they would have no choice but to Any casual visitor to Times Square has probably debt, and without even a plan of how to bail us out. continue doing so: the United States is the center of noticed the famed 'national debt clock', an elec- But fear not, there is a way out. This Saturday all economic activity for our planet. In Frils' own tronic billboard perched atop one of the area's Representative Paolo Frils (R-NE) will officially words, "We're the only game in town. Nullification many strip clubs. Upon seeing the clock, which introduce his new debt cutting package into the might make our creditors angry, but there is nothing displays an up to the minute estimate of our House Subcommittee for Fiduciary Affairs and they could do about it. What are they going to do, national debt, two things come to mind; one, that it Analysis. It's a revolutionary, bold piece of legisla- invade us? Ooooooh, I'm shakin' in my boots!" looks bigger on TV, and two, there sure are a lot of tion, not without its flaws, but certainly better than I can find only one flaw with Frils' plan: it numbers up there. any other plan to hit the Hill in recent years. would never pass through Congress. There are The national debt is the much ballyhooed and To begin to understand Representative Frils' always groups of namby-pambys and naysayers discussed deficit incurred by years of Cold War plan, a short history lesson is in order. During the who won't vote for anything that might cause a defense spending. The United States owes trillions formative years of the United States, Andrew little conflict. of dollars to its debtors, which translates into thou- Jackson, serving as Thomas Jefferson's Secretary of What we need then is a confident, charismatic sands you will personally have to shoulder. the Treasury, came up with the concept of assum- leader who can push the legislation through Political pundits love to point this out. "The gov- ing debt. In order to help the new states grow Congress. This plan calls for a President which the ernment is less efficient financially than you are," financially, Jackson had the Federal government US hasn't seen the likes of for quite some time... an they shout gleefully. "Not only are they spending take on the debts of each individual state. This Eisenhower or a Teddy Roosevelt. What do those your money, but they're spending more than maneuver not only improved the financial situa- two leaders have in common? A glorious history of you've got!" The pundits also love to point out the tion of the states, but tied them closer to the still military history. The only leaders capable of stir- absurdity of running a deficit. "If you wrote a shaky Federal government. ring up the raw nationalism required to drive nul- check for a hundred bucks when you've only got a The first part of Frils' plan says that the Federal lification are former war heroes. dollar in your account," they cry, "you'd be hauled government should assume any debts incurred by Unfortunately, the US has been in precious few off to jail!" Pundits are an unpleasant lot. the individual states, much as Jackson did. This wars in the last couple of decades, and there is a Their point, however, is valid. The idea that our move, of course, only increases the national debt; it dearth of heroes. What we require is a new, exciting government is spending more money than it actu- is not by itself a solution. This is where part two of war to build ourselves some champions. I propose ally has is both foolish and scary. As more and Frils' plan comes into play. we invade Canada; it won't be difficult, and after- more of our elected leaders have had that concept In the second part of the plan, America takes a new wards we can turn it into a giant ski resort. pounded into their thick, sloping foreheads we've and daring stance in the world order. Having With an appropriate leader procured, the nullifi- been introduced to several anti-deficit measures. assumed the debt of the states, the Federal govern- cation legislation is sure to pass. Until we have that The newest of these measures is the Balanced ment now nullifies and voids all foreign debts and leader, though, the bill's future is grim. I encourage Budget amendment. One of the key concepts of the delinquencies. In effect, America tells those to you to call your representatives and support it Republican "Contract with America", the amend- whom it owns money, "Hey, we don't owe you after its' introduction on the first. Help your coun- ment would have forced the government to submit nothing!" By nullifying the debt, the USA removes try and help yourself! and approve a balanced budget every year. Critics all its financial problems with one simple statement. M o0S h T h s Preston by Katherine Zafiris had Live play for them as well as scheduling dents. But since the prices would be different for Sheryl Crow and Candlebox to play. I guess their non-students, wouldn't that be extra revenue for Violence is the number one problem in America students are much more civilized then us. the school? In a time of budget crisises, you would that keeps growing and growing. Federal and As a student here, this enrages me. Is he saying think the school would make decisions that would state governments has passed death penalties, gun that we are violent, uncivilized, and belligerent bring money to the school not keep it out. laws, and crime bills to help alleviate the problem. people that we couldn't handle a band coming Now, I know that there have been petitions sent Communities have banned together and have here? And if this is the position that he is taking; to Vice President Preston's office about bands play- formed coalitions to bring an end to certain crimes, why is it that the only music acts that come here are ing here. I can make a guess that he read the peti- And what is our contribution as a school to help only to one kind of music, particularly Rap music? tions and said to himself, "Let me stifle the students alleviate crime and violence, Stony Brook does not Those acts can cause violent uprisings and some and say that a band can play here and then I'll say allow any bands to play at the school that may that its too dangerous, the audience may want to have a huge turnout of students and any form of dance and our security staff is not trained for danc- dancing involved, especially Moshing. For those of ing." Gee, Vice President Preston, I didn't know we you who don't know what Moshing is, it is a form lived in Bible country. of dancing that includes bumping and shoving of Funny thing is that the school complains that a other people. It is very popular among teenagers lot of students transfer to upstate schools after and young twenty something year-olds. Rarely about a year here and that not a lot of people stay does it lead to any form of extreme violence. her on weekends. So here's news for the Stony Stony Brook has had a long tradition of bands Brook Administration; have some kind of social playing here, yet the tradition seemed to be dying outlets for students. off since the last band to play here was Phish and Let bands come back, give your students some that was about four years ago. Now it has come to kind of fun. In the immortal words of Kevin Bacon htt tfpniioof man sti~ncde amnt lndam us frnm 4h mnipic FrfnC "t LetCifhem d•anrce ancd that the band Live was to play here. That plan was have lyrics that explicitly promote violence. Why is get to know each other." This school doesn't have nixed after Vice President Preston cancelled the it that they are allowed to play and bands like Live cultural diversity. It has groups that don't know concert. The only reason that students have for aren't? I guess the only people who go to Stony each other and students who hate to live here. this cancellation is a rumor that Vice President Brook are uncivilized fools and all the straight and Grow up and trust your students, they might Preston of Student Affairs said that the band's normal people go to other schools like C.W. Post surprise you. And to the students who read this, music may prompt some students to Mosh; and and Hofstra that all sponsor popular bands, not to all students, write and call Student Affairs and that it was too dangerous of a decision to have the mention SUNY schools upstate that hold concerts. demand to have bands play here again. Tell him to band come to our school and play. What's inter- Big name bands attract a lot of outside people trust us and that he is not an expert on music or esting about this decision, is that three other to the concerts. Obviously, the people attending the behavior of the students at this school. Don't SUNY schools, including Albany and Oneonta the concert would not just be Stony Brook stu- fear us, we're not as bad as yoi think. March 27, 1995 page 3 0r, ld1ilWALnril LOA i -- , ,, , , -. Lethargic Lollygaggers "He's mean, he's wacky, his are a rare commodity these stocked dorm room; learning name is Pataki!" This chant, days, too often bought and happens in your head. perhaps even now echoing sold like some pork belly. Two Perhaps I'm mistaken, but it across the spacious cranial comments in particular really looked to me like every person cavities of New York State's got me thinking. The first is marching that day had their municipal officers, was one of the sort of catch-all criticism head with them. What's the rallying cries of Thursday's of Thursday's march which Giuliani doing with his? (3/23) march by S.U.N.Y. and flowed all too easily off the The second perplexing com- C.U.N.Y. students, faculty, oily-slick tongue of Rudy ment was a gripe from the and interested parties. Giuliani. His Honor criticized Chief of Patrol, his complaint Although one of many, this teachers for "canceling class- was that the protesters had protest at City Hall received es" saying that the students not obtained a protest permit. particular media attention due should be studying not Although I can, in principle, to the outbreak of violence. protesting. In fact, I'll wager understand his viewpoint, While reading vivid descrip- that Giuliani, Pataki, and all practically speaking, detaining tions of young academicians their Albany cronies wish you a permit would seem to go who were maced and beaten were in school studying hard, against the general spirit of with nightsticks, I had visions rather than protesting, march- civil disobedience. He didn't of third-world conflicts ing, voting, and generally pay- seem to get that these were a between angry crowds and riot ing attention to what they're lot of pissed off protesters police; I found myself wonder- doing. College life is about looking to lynch some legisla- ing. "Can the time for change learning and experience. The tion; not the lethargic legion of have really come?" last place this is going to occur lollygaggers his pompous There have been people is in the classroom; the class- Patakiness had misunderstood vehemently crying out for room is a useful place to them to be. change throughout recent access information and guid- All in all I felt good about the memory (and earlier), but ance from professors, audio- march. It showed that people given rampant conflict of inter- visual media, and whatever in my generation were commit- est and the fallen-idol apathy creative forms the art of teach- ting themselves to something, of generation X, one begins to ing is taking on these developing more of a revolu- wonder if ever again there days...what have you, tionary, rather than a con- could be such a thing as an but... learning is something sumer mentality. I only hope American Revolutionary. We accomplished by the student. that we remain a wary people, are a country borne out of The provenience of learning is and our legislators remember anger and chaos, red rockets neither in the classroom nor that the ultimate power lies, and bursting bombs, so to during office "'hours, it is not and has always lain, with the speak. Unfortunately, ideals even in a late-night caffeine- people. Let freedom ring.
Letters E&~IDla~ap~g~Brara~l·~~ Dear Press, with his dedication to the cause of nature are those that can incite a crowd to hat< It seems that some people that contribute and what must be a very demanding social something and yet all the time each persor to your fine publication are little more than life. I will not retract my statement. If one is knows exactly why they hate. mudslingers. They have to resort to slander- reduced to picking up the butt-end of private • ing the good name of other upstanding citi- conversations, then that person can hardly Gugroeous. . .. Gjeof.•••l zens of Stony Brook in order to bolster the expect to understand the full meaning of the crumbling walls of their own arguments. statements made. Yet I stray from my point. Dear Editor, It is really a shame how a perfectly reason- Mr. Crean's article actually highlighted I can't help but respond to article that was able point of view can be corrupted by the some very important topics for humanity issued regarding Humanities Cafe [Ed. Note bigotry of the author. There have been many today. We are constantly being besieged on Vol XVI No. 11]. As a former student and instances in the past of this "debate-by-hate" all sides by the media about the seriousness current staff member, I would like to write to tactic, and I have the utmost respect for The of deforestation. It is not a simple problem, give you my opinion on the employees of the Press in printing arguments that normally and one whose scope cannot be satisfactori- cafeteria. I eat at Humanities at least three would be fit for the wastebasket. Normally I ly detailed in such a short letter. times a week and have never encountered just sigh and read on, trying to ignore the Mr. Crean also mentioned the appalling the people that Katherine Zafiris was writing obvious bias and find the point of the article. mutilation of a cat that is really a very dis- about. ALL of the people who work there Though sometimes this is difficult. tressing incident. Unfortunately his argu- have ALWAYS gone out of their way to give From: [email protected] I finally read an article which really ments were lost in the morass of maniacal me what I've wanted, and if I didn't get it's To: [email protected] flipped my gourd. In the last publication, rage and fanatic drivel. I asked some of my because it was in the house( at the time), Subject: Letter to the Editor there was an article titled "Moon Rising" friends to read the article. Once they got NOT lack of effort. I agree that the ladies like written by Tommy Crean [Ed. Note - Vol over the initial fits of laughter at seeing my to chat, but they do it while they work. Dear Editors; XVI No. 11], in which I found myself the name in it, 1 asked them what they thought They all understand that customers that This letter is in response to the article "I brunt of a vicious attack. I will spare you a the point of the argument was. Most of the come to get lunch are on a tight schedule, Am Not a Femi-Nazi", written by one H. little typesetting by briefly outlining the answers came out as "Oh. Umm. Well, including faculty and staff, and do the best Rosenow. {Ed. Note - Vol XVI No. 111 What paragraph of Mr. Crean's article I am refer- don't hurt nature or something." Mr. Crean they can to help everybody. It's hard to get is the point of this article? There is nothing ring to. Mr., Crean wrote about a social had obviously convinced his audience dozens of people through one line at the new or exciting or provocative stated. It is meeting in Kelly Quad. The R.A. did an beyond any shadow of a doubt. deli section, that's why they have sand- just a re-hash of the same old tired views of ice-breaker in which the point of the exer- To wrap things up, it is a great shame that wiches that have been prepared in advance, feminism stuffed down our throats. We do cise was to add an adjective to your first such a valid argument can be drowned in a if you want something special, you have to not need to be told there is a gender gap in name, that started with the same letter as sea of verbal diarrhea. Although I make my wait on line. Maybe if one day when more the career market...it is common knowledge your name (i.e. 'crazy' Chris). He over- point specifically to the person who hides room is allocated to them, I'm sure that the that one exists. Maybe it would be more heard a "gorgeous Jeff' whom he described behind the name Tommy Crean, it applies, lines won't be as long, but the people will effective if such preachers as Miss as a "gumpy looking fuck." Geof said, to everybody. An argument can become a STILL be pleasant.Until then you can only Rosenow got off of their soap-boxes and quite passionately "Let's go trash the bam- powerful weapon by targeting specific please some of the people some of the time. actually gave some ideas for change instead boo forest." By this time you have probably individuals. Look at any political cam- of defending her right as a feminist. It must realized that was me. paign, for example. Yet, if the attack is so Richard Sallustro, be realized that whenever there is a radical Of course I resent the insult, but I fear it is vicious and narrow-minded that it obscures Data Communications Administrator movement, that there will be people who too much to demand an apology. Mr. Crean the meaning of the debate, then the weapon Computing & Communications will try to stop obviously has far too much to think about, becomes useless. The greatest demagogues ECC Bldg, Rm 211 you and demor- Icontinued on next page [ The Stony Brook Press page 4 ~B~llll~as~lAlllb~inarre~a~~cp~slrs;~r~r
By Manning Marable wide in 1994 was $4,440 a year. cies are proliferating due to welfare, or that the Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich blusters that average AFDC payment is any kind of incentive to Behind the republi- he will do whatever is "necessary to help, cajole, have more children. What is absolutely clear is that cans' policies today is a lure or force adults off welfare and into paid the majority of poor women would like to climb out strategy of class war- employment." But let's go beyond the polemics of poverty, and genuinely would prefer to work. fare, social polarization and look at the facts. Let's all agree that the guiding Policies which punish children and penalize their and division. But to jus- principle should be to move welfare recipients into mothers do nothing to reverse the cycle of poverty. tify its policy agenda, it the permanent labor force, with incomes which To restructure the welfare system for the poor manipulates prejudices could actually support families. The Department of will also require the end of "welfare for the rich." and social tensions a Health and Human Services estimated last year Last year, the Progressive Policy Institute released against racial minorities, poor people and the that it would take 2.3 million jobs to employ all the a study identifying $111 billion in preferential pro- unemployed. The clearest illustration of this is the women who have been on welfare for at least two grams to large corporations and industries, like oil Republican position on "welfare reform." years. If the government also provides day care for and gas companies, agribusinesses, private utili- Several weeks ago, Republican leaders in the children of working mothers, plus supervisors and ties, and firms which are permitted to make tax- House called for a radical restructuring of the wel- work-related materials, it would cost an estimated free profits from investments in US-held territories fare program, by abolishing individual entitle- $11,440 per person per year - seven thousand dol- such as Puerto Rico. Corporate welfare drains the ments to welfare benefits and by replacing them lars per year more than the average welfare recipi- economy of billions of dollars. with block grants to the states. Hundreds of thou- ent currently receives. The total expense for a Social divisions in our country are becoming sands of poor women with children, including national work program to replace welfare could be deeper every day. Between 1980 and 1992, the most legal and illegal immigrants, would be $15 billion. Clinton's current welfare plan, far less average family income for the top quarter of all denied benefits. Currently, more than 9.7 million ambitious, would only create jobs for 400,000 peo- households soared 16 percent above inflation, to American children receive Aid to Families with ple, or only seven percent of all AFDC recipients. $91,368. Real average incomes for families in e bot- Dependent Children (AFDC) benefits. But the Republicans claim that even Clinton's pro- tom 25 percent fell 7 percent, to only $11,530. Before we can "reform" the welfare system, we posal is "too expensive." Millions of Americans - black, Latino, Asian and need a clear understanding how and why poverty is In the final analysis, what the welfare debate is white - are trapped in poverty. By punishing the perpetuated. The recent research study of LaDonna really about is the massive polarization of affluency poor, we only drag down the productivity of A. Pavetti of the Urban Institute established that and poverty within our society, and what, if any- everyone. about two-thirds of all women on welfare leave the thing, should be done about it. The "Contract with system in less than two years, usually because they America" argues that states should not increase Dr. Manning Marable is Professor of History and are able to find work. But the jobs they get are low- cash assistance when welfare mothers that addi- Director, Institute for Research in African-American paying, often without health insurance and other tional children. Former Reagan Education studies, Columbia University, New York. "Along The benefits. If they have children, they are rarely able to Secretary William Bennett insists that by "cutting Color Line" is featured in over 275 publications and is obtain decent or affordable day care. Eventually, off" welfare benefits to unmarried teenage mothers broadcastby 80 radio stations across the U.S. and inter- three-quarters of the women return to welfare, and that the number of out of wedlock children would nationally. 45 percent are on AFDC within twelve months. The decline. But there is absolutely no scientific or average welfare grant for a mother of two nation- scholarly evidence indicating that teenage pregnan- cp
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LETTERS AND EDITORIALS SHOULD BE NO aper inthe world! MORE THAN 500 WORDS AND ARTICLES. VIEWPOINTS BETWEEN 500 TO 1200 WORDS AND NONSENSICLE RAVING SHOULD HAVE he staff has grown by 200%in the past 8weeks NO MORE THAN 20 TO 25 DIRTY WORDS. continued from previous page alize you with such terms as "femin-nazi." Get ovei it...the Rush Limbaughs of the world will keep using such and cntinues to expand daily. terms, especially if it sets of the kind of effect that is expressed in the article. For if you are wasting your time writing about how you are not a femi-nazi, you are no accomplishing the task which you seem so devout in accom Join us, have areal good time makiIng un of plishing-equal rights for women. As a side note, condescension is not a good way of gaining support-your views on why man feels threatened by the fern inways they inist movement are irrelevant and not altogether true. It is most of the other people on campus quite possible that men fell threatened by the upsurgence o female employee-quotas where better qualified men may no be hired so that a company can hire a female employee to bet ter fulfill its gender spectrum-it is something to think about will never know they're being made fun of. Its ahoot!
From: Richard Resnick
The Stony Brook Press page 6 Dear Oceansize, Dear Oceansize, Dor kVha-oteor ~bwr a&0 T1s, 9 find myself drawn to Springtime...the delicate Ti5t of Ot 0 hing i uper fbh , no ot- smell of edenberries and the cool morns that burn 9f 9 have $7.50 to my name and 9'm in a grocery hftrwjht- t-i . tarhap5 rn a -pot IFvupo boot upr off into days warm enough to shed the sweaters store and 9 can either purchase three weeks cakQJ orpntf2 too mna"and nowj upo crca-pO )ng for we wore all Winter long. We can renew our faith in worth of catfood that my cats desperately need or rt-.KatOhirog thtf+happo)5 to up0 happr 2wwitfout a life and cast away the feelings of dread that a six pack of a quality adult beverage that 9 des- rn2aon. T55ortJký tho Cathoics cro nght jhen th+) accompany the cold, depressing sunlight scarce perately need? Which should 9 buy? This is some- 1c4 gatt- trrp3 on upa. It +6 upcr faot- and upo hoQ-to days that end so quickly, extinguishing hopes and thing that comes up a lot in my house and 9 real- dcal wiit-h r. bilQoT caOl 5~2 oup a-ro kkl rod I coar dreams with the final purple rays of the dying ly need to know! 522 upu 5PQpent Itti -hi lcrning th- AAuthor'5 nae2z. sun. eut the Spring is full of hope and life, wonder mar) author'5 haip 5ttpid nas-kf"coW t-lýhou dd- n't mak2 ~i-in tho bu5inr2,5 orti, andfng up jKrd Irntro- and joy answered by the gleeful singing of all.of Cat Lover Qorttd, r2clco55 w'ohilod thQ52dK2 uosKnorwjn to a Nature's orchestras. 9 find the sunlight touches korid thQ ' Stupid Name continued from page 6 "But wait-" "Let me finish," she said as she sat on the edge of the bed. "You Top 10 Reasons Why Sprinm Sucks don't have time for me. Your life is too busy and apparently I don't fit into it. Maybe, for now...we should stop seeing each other." 10. The mini skirt and bicycle pants are 'out' "But I need you." Doug pleaded reaching for her. 9. Too damn warm "You don't need me," she answered, moving away. "You need a pair of breasts, and until you 8. Don't feel the need to pick people out of puddles are ready to spend more time with me and treat me the way I should be treated, I think a little of their own vomit, as it won't freeze their face space is best." "OK, fine. If that's how you want it," he said to the ground as he put on his sneakers. "But I just want you to know that I do care about you... a lot. And I 7. Can now smell all the sewage don't think it's fair that you punish me because of the responsibilities that I have to my life and 6. 'Cadbury's Cream Eggs' will be gone after Easter my future. Our future." "I'm not trying to punish you, Doug. I love 5. Makes people happy you. But I can't sit here and hope to see you maybe two or three hours a week. That's pun- 4. You may graduate and have to find a 'real' job ishing me and I don't deserve it either." "Well if that's how you feel, then I guess this 3. Cute and Fuzzy Bunnies is good-bye." 2. Finals, again "Yes, this is good-bye," she said as she stood up from the bed to open the door. Without a kiss, a 1. Lose an hour sleep on 4/2 because of Daylight hug or even a touch of the hand, he walked out of the door and out of her life forever. Savings Time March 27, 1995 page 7 - 111. -I- ~---- -C --~--I------Y-- ---I~-·~--C--L-~------IC-~-·IWO - IP ~RII~----·C~-·s---- IC -·C-C-. ~P~slC~Pd-~ ~L l-;-P -~Pe~ePP·-BL·lle ---- 1 ~L~b~CL--~-C-~--~~ ,- ~-s I 0n IN THIS COUNTRY STAND UP I'VE NEVERSEEN WJEHAVE A CUSTOM THAT'S IT... ANYBODY GET THAT'S WHEN MEN ASK NOW THI5S KICKED INTO GOTTA WOMEN TO FETCH WILL REALLY HIS HAT HURT. COFFEE. SURPRISE BEFORE. YOU. (0- -- THEN I WILL SCULPT OUR ELBONIAN OWNERS OURMOTTO I5S THEIR MOTTO 15 EACHOF YOUWILL URITE OUR BUSINESS THESEDISPARATE PIECE5 SOLDTHE COMPANY TO S "IF YOU CAN'TJ "AFTER YOU BEAT YOUROBJECTIVE5 AND PLAN WILL BE OF CLAY INTO AN OUR BIGGEST BEAT 'EM, 'EM, HUMILIATE GIVE THEMTO •E LIKE A CLAY ELEGANT TAPESTRY COMPETITOR JOIN 'EM. 1WONDER TAPESTRY? 8 WHAT THEIR WHCICHWILL BE OUR I ~ IT'S NOT VERY FEELFREE MOTTO IS CATCHY. S BUSINESS PLAN K"" I TO QUOTE u ccas-a ) /^ u8 - The Stony Brook Press page 8 ~ kfa4A) March 27,1995 page9 ZnA A toIy) r Isee by Louis M. Moran One of the more heavily advertised beers, taste." But in spite of that, most found the 'Best Fosters, received the worst appellations that can be Beer In America' to be the best beer at Stony Brook. If you ever graduate, if you manage to get a job tossed at a beer, "It's OK if you're drunk." Nothing "I like it, natural bubbles," "funky smell, not bad," in your field (say if a baby boomer dies), if you worse can be said about a beer. To hate a beer is "amazingly smooth," seemed to be the order of things ever make more than $30K a year you could pur- one thing, to be apathetic toward it is another. for the tasters, but one, just one taster had a disparag- chase these beers on a regular basis. In our second A beer most of the tasters had never heard of, ing remark for Samuel Adams. "A bitter cup full of ever Beer Fest, the Stony Brook Press goes upscale Saranac, did very well depite the initial confusion Rush Limbaugh's sweat," intoned one ex-Press staff in the hopes that our journalistic careers will over the name, "Doesn't Saranac make member. someday net us enough cash to drink quality baseball gloves?" New Amsterdam's beers. Anyone can get piss drunk on Miller Most tasters thought Saranac had a nasty S... New York Amber Geniune Draft, but that's no aspiration, to get piss after taste. "There's something gnarly in Beer had not only drunk on some exotic beer laden with berries, now there.", they commented. "Bad vegatable the longest name that's an aspiration! taste." Others found the "leafy" flavor to but also some of the Drinking is now the American pastime, and beer exude a "real man's beer"-flavor. nicest remarks never goes on strike. Most beer drinkers do not Pnof4allt s IA7;r,1WikdVvYILKeU AIn UauiItAdc%1^ it-i, LIh e best L nameLm i Lax7;,n h kItbr.4" ac drink beer for the taste, but instead for the effect. in beer, fleshed out to be an average beer "Good evening These beers were supposed to have flavor and no better than Geniune Draft or Stroh's (if beer," "nice aroma, larger than lager kick. At over $6.50 a six pack you're already drunk.) natural bubbles," these beers were to be the ambrosia of the beer "Oxidized metallic taste," "the Devil's "I'll be tasting that world. Not that price makes a good beer. Samuel beer, "smells of good hops, but disap- tomorro w, Adams Triple Bock works out to about $7.00 an pointing," and, "tastes like stale piss," seemed to "piquant and rosey with a hint of dark stained 8.5oz bottle and tastes like maple syrup on bread sum it up for the tasters about Pete's. wood." Although one taster described the brew as with an after taste that will curl your tongue into Another lesser known, Anchor, seemed to be the "noxoious iced tea,". a Crazy Bread knot. most innocuous of the beers, most testers stating it Harp's, made by the people who give us Guiness, Beer snobs will tell you is sort of a red headed that lagers are better Beer Ratingsf step-child of Guiness. than beers, and ports are It was flagellated by better than lagers and L,11 1.. %*iI... L0%LL..L 0% the tasters with uOcKS diare uetter 1 00 remarks like, "almost than...blah, blah, and so- gets you there," forth. Beer snobs will 90 *Key* "smells like hops but also insist that 1: Fosters don't taste them," Prohibition's Beer Law, 80 Amstesmells like puss," which made labeling the 2: Amstel Light "smells like vomit," content illegal, is 70 alcohol 3: Heinelen "the C minus of a good thing because R 4: Anchor beers," and "like a beer is to be drunk for a 60 a taste. Beer snobs be t50 5: Killian's Red homely woman with damned The Press Beer i 6: Saranac good personality." The two beers most Fest got underway. n 40 7: Brooklyn universally hated by The methods of the Beer 40 8: Harp the tasters were Fest were rather suspect 30 though. First, everyone 9: New Amsterdam Brooklyn Beer (which save for EIC Ted Swedalla 20 10: Sam Adams was likened to "greasy was on their way to ine- 11: Pete's Wicked Italians,') and Amstel, which carried the fun- briation via the Double 10 niest remark, "tastes Bock Super-Highway. like shoes." Amstel Second, the quality beer 0 I r Ir - 1 I • • U . also had "tastes like was proffered up in plas- 1 2 3I 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 Bud." tic cups that made every- Brooklyn seemed to have "visi- thing taste like credit cards. Third, there was nothing to had no flavor at all. "It's all right, it doesn't taste ble chunks," and was "icky, like Carlsburg Elephant cleanse the palette. No peanuts, no crackers, no water, like anything," and, "flirtatious little beer," were beer." Brooklyn became the brunt of so many jokes no pretzels, no nothing. And last, the tastings were the most positive things said about it. all the tasters thought it would certainly come in done in pairs which lead to a few problems. "Here try Standards like Heineken, the beer you're sup- dead last. "Just the smell tells me I'm not going this, this really sucks," leading the pack. to posed to drink with good friends, did very poorly like it." "Tastes like my grandmother's The sober EIC sat in The Press office ante-chamber, house," due to their mass produced texture and flavor. [Ed's note: No one knows what that means]. a scary little office in the back of a scary little office "Average everyday beer," "eh," "not natural, mass After the taste test we all enjoyed the leftover annexed to the past issue racks. Hiltler's bunker 1 " 4 1 t !1I " beer and although was easier to move produced, ".smells ot horrible butt ooze," the Sam Ad's was all gone the commented the tasters. But the most color- Harp's and about in. Two peo- Killian's filled the void pretty well. ful statement about Heineken was, "bad, Several ple actually got lost people went out for more beer to drink like bat urine." Perhaps Heineken is still going back there. and Bass, St. Pauli Girl, and more Sam Ad's were Anyway.... spending too much on advertising, despite quaffed with little regard for taste or bouquet. their claims to the contrary. Ted numbered Yet amazingly the staff and tasters alike left Killian's Red came in seventh even those crappy blue one beer untouched. One brand, one twelve though responses ranged from, Solo cups 1-11 and "icky berry pack, a dozen frosty brews sat unmolested by flavor," to "Shaq's jock squeezings." the taste test began. One the drunkards that flocked to The Press office taster however had "a tear in his eye," Our resident beer in a that night. One beer that spills more in a day good way though. snobs mentioned than some microbrewers make in a Beer snobs will weep when they realize year...alone...nary a pop-top pulled...the car- bubbles, and ,!I - t V ------A A Ir. I I I . . , I I .. aroma. The hard core drinkers, the ones who drink that Samuel Adams tinished in a dead tie board unbent...Budwieser, The King of beers, (no one but Ted knows how to get drunk, used more plebian adjectives to the scoring worked) eschewed by college drunks. with New Amsterdam Amber Beer. As it turns describe their likes and hates...words like bleh, out if you leave The staff did very little driving and only a couple icky and piss came up again and again. Sam Ad's in a plastic cup too long it melts the cup taking on a "weird, plastic processed of us were pregnant during this test. The Stony Brook Press page 10 MentoSl The Freshmaker You've puzzled over the commercials, now, hot off pellet of perkiness, and decrees that she and only Mutant Killer Mom' are actors from a sitcom tak- the internet, comes the explanation! she shall be the one to ride the baggage cart, and all ing place in Northern Germany. The mother, (inci- the other most unfresh patrons of the airport shall dentally, whose last name is 'Teufel', which means The Mentos FAQ V2.0 (11/2/94 update) bear the full weight of their baggage. Her friends Devil in German) is a crazy character in the show, (c)1994 Heath Doerr cheer, and dream of one day achieving a freshness and one who would be avoided normally. Anyone [email protected] such as hers. who has seen the sitcom, (i.e. Germans) would e-mail auto server: [email protected] understand this, but the American audience is 4. The Car Movers (or 'Overalls and Mentos') understandably confused. 1. The Broken Shoe (or 'High Heel Treachery') Only an unfresh person would park his car in A sassy young lady sashays past an open air such a way as to make his fellow motorist unable 6. Through the Car (or 'The 3 Second Car Jacking') French style cafe, gaining the attention of a busi- to go about her merry way, but that's just what our There is little peace in the land of Mentos, as yet ness man, and at the same time interrupting his heroine is faced with in this episode of the Mentos another teen is faced with a distressing problem. newspaper enjoyment. As she glides past, a saga. After an exchange of dirty looks, and com- While crossing the street, he is separated from his footwear malfunction occurs, leaving her sans one munication of the parkee's need for promptness, friends, and nearly from his legs by an over anx- heel. She reaches for her secret freshness inducer, the young girl contemplates her dilemma with the ious motorist. Finding himself needing to traverse Mentos. After administering a piece of the magic aid of a freshmaker. She has a revelation, and sum- the street, but without a normal means to do so, he elixir of nuttiness, she breaks off the remaining mons what looks to be the Pittsburgh Steelers again thanks his lucky stars he remembered the spike, proclaiming to the world her resourceful- offensive line from a construction site across the freshmaker. His supply is reduced by one, but his ness, and endless freshness. The man in the cafe is way. With surprisingly little convincing, the bar- freshness is increased exponentially. Opening the undoubtedly impressed. barians lift her Fiat into the road, and as she thanks rear door, he climbs through the auto, while the them she glances in the way of her nemesis, only to driver looks over his shoulder in astonishment. 2. The Fake Photographer (or 'Those Crazy Kids I') add an exclamation point to her freshness. Upon exiting, the youth shrugs at the motorist, A young lad and his pals file through a mob of Mentos in hand. Although a bit shaken, the pas- fanatics and paparazzi, in order to get a closer look 5. Evading Mom (or 'Psycho Mutant Killer Mom') senger acknowledges the care free youths with an at their favorite star. However, their adventure While enjoying a pleasant afternoon at the mall, approving glance as he speeds away. "Wait till the takes them over the legal boundaries of said activi- a teen and his companions suddenly spot one of wife hears of my brush with freshness!" ty, which is then pointed out to them by the author- their mothers. She raises her umbrella, signifying ities. After a bit of contemplation, and a hearty that she has acquired her target, and means to 7. The Backstage Crew (or 'Those Crazy Kids II') dose of freshness ala Mentos, our hero cunningly move in for the kill. Quickly searching his person, In the final episode, once again the establishment disguises himself as a member of the media, and the teen removes from his pocket the only thing to has prevented some teens from achieving their breaks through the defenses of the establishment. help him out of this bind, Mentos. Thinking quick- goal. At the backstage door to a rock concert, our ly, and now sporting fresh, clean breath, he seizes friends are star struck and must find a way back- 3. The Airport Tram Ride (or 'Baggage Claim Blues') a baseball cap from a nearby mannequin. The per- stage to meet their idols, demonstrate their fresh- A young woman finds herself in a bit of a pinch, fect disguise! Placing it on his head in a diagonal ness, and enjoy each others minty clean breath. as she discovers that she has packed too much, and pattern, he strikes a pose and avoids his pursuer. Musical paraphernalia is being unloaded, and with her bags are a most bothersome burden. But she She spots him again, but this time only after enter- the aid of a bandanna, one teen slips through the has no fear, it is a burden which is not insur- ing the escalator. Knowing she has been van- line undetected. At the last moment, a security mountable, especially, with Mentos on her side. quished, mom shakes her weapon yet again, all the guard spots him, but instead of pouncing on him She unsheathes her glimmering blue tube of fresh- while thinking, 'My son is sooo fresh!' and beating him to a bloody mess with his night- ness, and holds it out stretched, like the mighty stick, he fets him go showing an expression that Excalibur, and although shortening it by 1/14, this An explanation: Jan Setje-Eilers ([email protected] could only mean one thing, "Those crazy kids!" weapon has not lost its power. She consumes the due.edu), tells us that the characters of 'Psycho continued from page speeches were making their This weekend... Stony Brook's biggest and most loved student activity! pleas to an all but empty chamber. A handful of other reps and some cute pages. We thought this was strange. The kind usher I who had seated us explained that the reps made these speeches just so the folks at home could see them on C-Span and read their comments in the Congressional Record. It suddenly made a great deal more sense why actors go into politics. As the debate wore on, we busied ourselves by ogling pages; the gallery provides an excellent view of cleavage. "I'd like to doink that little blond one." Blurted out my roomie, pointing to a curvy young Long Island's foremost Science page. "Oh, I don't think you want to do that. Newt's nailing her." I replied. "So, I could slam her too. Not Fiction/Fantasy Conference! at the same time as Newt mind you. I love Newt and all, but I don't ever want to see him naked." He said. "You don't understand, he's hung like a horse Featuring Siddeg El Fadil, man, how do you think he became Speaker?" I said. "That's how they choose the leader?" He asked. Star "Did you ever see Tom Foley's feet?" I quipped. Trek: DS9's "Dr. Bashir"! "How come we didn't choose our editor-in-chief this way? Have you ever seen Dave's feet?" He Andrew Robinson, Star Trek: DS9's "Garak"! asked. "I don't know why we don't use that method, but it is probably for the best." Jerry Doyle, Babylon 5's "Garibaldi"! The House finally stopped debating and sum- moned the napping representatives by ringing a bell. The Republican side won by about twenty and other equally cool guests! votes. We left and went to watch the newscasts about the impending forced starvation of children. As it turns out, the vote we witnessed had nothing This Weekend, March 31- April 2, 1995, at SUNY Stony Brook to do with starving children. It was about agreeing What, you've got something better to do on a weekend at USB? to the rules for the upcoming budget debate. You The Press takes no responsibility for phaser injuries incurred during I-CON wouldn't have known that from being there. March 27, 1995 page 11 Dy rieamer Kosenow explain wny women are more ilKely to tap into commissure. the two hemispheres of the brain more than their Woman have a larger anterior commissure than Gender wars and politics aside, I found the fol- male counterparts. These new discoveries sub- men which could again be used to explain why lowing idea interesting. Not only do most men and stantiate the belief that women are far more emo- women tend to utilize both sides the brain for women behave and think differently, but there is tional than men through the studies of biology. many tasks for which men only use one hemi- new evidence that our brains differ slightly in basic Women, due to their enlarged corpus callosum, sphere. A new study led by Ruben Gur of the biological structure. There is also evidence that will tap into both the reasoning and emotional University of Pennsylvania cited the outcome of a each respective gender uses different parts of the sections of the brain while expressing opinions positron emission tomography (PET) of 37 men brain for the same tasks. Stereotypes dating back and 24 women. Each person was injected with centuries now have some Neuroscientists serious- radioactive glucose so that their brain activity ly searching for truth behind the cliches. To date could be detected. Each person was told to "go these "brain scientists" have only found a few dif- blank" and think of nothing. The brain activity of ferences in brain structures between women and both genders was monitored during of a thirty men, yet however few their numbers are, these minute period. In mens idling brains, the action new found facts are still curious and fascinating. was in the temporal-limbic system. This primitive The temporal lobe is a region of the cerebral cortex region controls highly unsubtle expressions of which controls memory, a person's sense of time, emotion, such- as fighting. 1 Women's brains and hearing. In men a region of this temporal lobe showed a lot of activity in the posterior cingulate has ten percent fewer nuerons than it does in gyrus, which is an evolutionarily event in the women. This could explain the tendency of women brains of mammals. It controls the complex expres- to be adept at language and their sometimes sion of emotions. This could explain why men tend spooky intuition in regards to the interpretation of to be more aggressive and more prone to violence peoples reactions or mood based, many times, sim- than their female counterparts. Even as I write this, ply on the intonation of a voice. Figure 241. Major landmarks of the medial portion of the loft cerorI a t.'•ia•t the studies continue. I must point out that these Secondly, the corpus callosum is a bundle of neu- differences in no way make one gender superior to rons which connects the left and right sides of the the other. Perhaps this is just nature's way of keep- brain, and aids in communication between the two ing us interested. halves or hemispheres of the brain. In men the corpus callosum is smaller than in and thoughts. Men, due to their smaller corpus women which suggests to neuroscientists that the callosum, are less likely to do this. Another "con- 1 Newsweek March 27, 1995 two halves of a male brain communicate less with necting factor" between the two sides of the brain one another than in the female brain. This helps to which differs in men and women is the anterior A Defense Of Fraternities by Fred I. DeSati Shashoua.) Of course, you'd rather have them in the time-honored theory of natural selection by one spot. The same goes for fraternities. Better to doing away with the less capable and the unintel- Before I begin my argument, I'd like to make a few have them concentrated in a tight little group at a ligent. Recent historical reports actually demon- things perfectly clear to the reader. I do not belong frat suite than in dormitories all over campus. strate that Charles Darwin was a member of Tau to a fraternity. I do not wish to join a fraternity. Were But this is assuming you dislike fraternity mem- Kappa Epsilon. I to be sought out by one of the aforesaid institu- bers, and I have to attack the reasons you might People have a tendency to forget the wonderful tions and requested to join, it would take much dislike them, as well. Perhaps it's their activities, things fraternities provide us with. They buy a coaxing to result in my yielding to their requests. Yes, they have been known to pull pranks like set- great deal of alcohol, which adds to an industry One can define coaxing however one wants. ting off fire alarms and flooding people's rooms. that employs hundreds of thousands of workers. Many of my friends and acquaintances have Now, who is to blame here? These are individual No one is avidly for unemployment, are they? expressed a less-than-approving view of fraterni- people, but of course, were there no fraternities, Well, by doing away with fraternities by continu- ties. They complain that these groups are com- odds are, this would still be happening. As a mat- ing to force negative stigma upon them, thereby prised of dense, unintellectual males whose prima- ter of fact, from a sociological/psychological making them see much less appealing to a group ry interests are sports, drinking, eating, and engag- standpoint, they might be happening even more. of people that might have joined had the stigma ing in sexual intercourse. They find them to be a The sophomoric antics of such fraternity members not initially appeared, you directly influence the scourge on the condition of campus-life as a whole. lends a certain stigma to belonging to a fraternity alcohol industry, and I don't think many of the They frown upon the Greek lettering which adorns group, which in turn shames them and makes people involved in the alcohol'industry would like rocks about the campus, they don't like to see three them do it less. Had it been a small group of hooli- you very much then. Greek symbols as graffiti on bathroom stalls, and gans with no official force bonding them together, Heavy fraternity content at a campus guarantees they sneer with derision when they enter 7-11 and there would be no place for the victims to point a that more people will seek to be admitted, thereby find a fraternity member purchasing beer at 11:30 finger, and as such, the activities would go unpun- raising the number of admissions and giving the PM on Thursday night. ished (punished as in generating stigma towards school more money, which will manifest itself in How do I know this? Not only have I heard it their brotherhood). And, ergo, the activities would other ways beneficial to all students. If we had first-hand, but a quick glance at the graffiti on be more common. The same applies to the drink- more fraternities in the SUNY system, Pataki's new bathroom stalls can show almost as many anti- ing and the derogatory comments often made budget might not be an issue, because the state Greek slogans as there are homosexual personal towards members of the opposite sex while under would be receiving much more money. ads. BAN FRATS. FUCK FRATS. FRATS SUCK. the influence of alcohol. And there is little, if no, Last but not least, fraternities are an EXCELLENT Read: IF YOU CAN'T JOIN 'EM, HATE 'EM. substantial evidence to support the theory that the source of obtaining drugs. Any group of people First and foremost, for those of you who would sociological institution of the fraternity inspires its that large with such a low tolerance quotient consider fraternity members to be "assholes," all I members to act in such a way. towaids controlled substances is bound to have have to say is that if no fraternities existed, the Other people are insulted by the hazing which some kind of receptacle filled with whatever it is same assholes would probably hang out together accompanies acceptance into such a foundation. If you are looking for. If you're going to get the drugs anyway; not to mention the fact that there are just someone decides that they want to run atop a bed anyway, I think everyone would agree that you as many assholes outside of frats as there are inside. of burning coals and then be handcuffed, beaten, buy it from the amenable fraternity brothers, Worth also mentioning is something I call the and left on the tracks of the LIRR shortly after rather than getting involved with some seedy Concentration Theory. If you accidentally spill a dawn as a means of getting people to like you, then pusher from New York City. And the fraternity boxful of iron fillings (that old metaphoric standby) that's their prerogative. They weren't forced into it, members can use your money to buy beer, which on the floor, and you wish to retrieve them, would and if they were coaxed, well, anyone foolish increases the proliferation of industry and decreas- you rather have them scattered about, or concen- enough to be coaxed into doing something like the es unemployment. trated in one spot? (Assuming, of course, that you above doesn't have very much of a productive Care for your country. Care for its people. Care have no magnet and are stumbling around with an future ahead of them anyway. In which case, we for the Greeks. open box of iron fillings like a complete and total are clearly presented with fraternities supporting The Stony Brook Press page 12 Who'll Take Oscar Home? by Chris Cartusciello particularly good performance but she has enough misprint. nominations in the past to pick up a statue. Well, its that time of the year again. Oscar time. Who?: Jessica Lange (Blue Sky); She's well known Best Picture And time for my Annual (annual for me that is, not but the film isn't. It sat on the shelf for three years Who Should Win: The Shawshank Redemption; Film you since this is the first time it's ever been print- before being released. making doesn't get any better than this. Problem is ed) Prediction List. Who should win, who will nobody saw it. win and who the hell some of these people are? Who Will Win: Forrest Gump; Its won everything else. Only chance to lose is if people are sick and Best Supporting Actor tired of hearing about it. Who Should Win: Gary Sinise (Forrest Gump); Who?: Four Weddings and a Funeral; Very funny How can you deny an award to a man who got his and well made but it has British humor which legs amputated for a part? Brilliant! many just don't get. Also only became popular Who Will Win: Martin Landau (Ed Wood); A good after it hit video. performance and a sentimental favorite. Can any- one say Jack Palance? Ofher Awards Who?: Chazz Palminteri (Bullets Over Broadway); Best Original Score A fine actor but not a chance. Lets see... a music category and Disney is nominat- Best Supporting Actress ed. I wonder who'll win? Who Should Win: Uma Thurman (Pulp Fiction); Best Original Song A vastly underrated actress who's time has come. Disney again! They have 3 nominations inrthis cat- Who Will Win: Dianrie Wiest (Bullets Over egory. Yes, Elton John is overplayed a, d run into Broadway); A Woody Allen film has to win some- the ground but people aren't sick of it yet. thing. Best Adapted Screenplay Who?: Helen Mirren (The Madness of King George); A close race between Gump and Shawshank. Gump Need I say more? was good and Shawshank was, believe it or not, Best Actor from a Stephen King story. Who Should Win: Morgan Freeman (The Best Original Screenplay Shawshank Redemption); A great performance and They'll have to give Pulp Fiction something. Here it is. not his first. Has two nominations in the past. But how many people could pronounce the title? Now before any of you start storming the office Who Will Win: Tom Hanks (ForrestGump); Just try because I didn't pick Pulp Fiction for any major and deny him. He will be only the second actor to win Best Director awards lets look at a few facts. two years in a row. Not since Spencer Tracy in 1937-38. Who Should Win: Robert Zemeckis (Forrest 1) It wasn't all that good of a movie. Tarentino has Who?: Nigel Hawthorne (The Madness of King Gump); Its Gump! He also has enough blockbusters had better. Does anybody remember Resevoir Dogs? George); 'nuff said. behind him to build a fine resume. 2) John Travolta, the comeback kid, was good but not Best Actress Who Will Win: Robert Zemeckis (Forrest Gump); even close to an award winning performance. And Who Should Win: Jodie Foster (Nell); She's talent- Same as above plus has a long association with last what was that dance he was doing? The Batusi? ed and popular. But she's already won twice and year's winner, Steven Spielberg. (3 Back To The 3) Its way too violent for the Academy to want to not many people saw the film. Futures and RoZer Rabbit). reward. They don't want this to become a trend. by Sara Weiss the report number to the Traffic Office that I is why you don't get a receipt unless you pay by wouldn't be charged for the replacement pass. credit card. I'm only a freshman here at Stony Brook but I've Believing what the person at Campus Security told At this point I can't see any solution to bus pass already experienced the horrors of being a com- me, I returned to the Traffic Office the next day, issue other then eliminating them altogether, and muter. So far I've had to walk from Main Campus report number in hand. I then explained my situa- allowing commuters to park in the lots by Admin to South P, been squished like a sardine in the com- tion to the brain trust at the window who told me and ESS. muter bus and lost my bus pass. This of course the people at Campus Security made up their own brings me to my major gripe about commuting, rules and once again asked for the $15 replacement other then the fact that the South P lot is way too fee. They then told that technically they were sup- Hand written submissions far from campus, the bus pass issue. posed to charge $20. Yeah right, as if that was sup- Recently I had the honor/horror of losing not posed to make me feel better. And they chose the will be stuffed in bottle, only my car keys, and I didn't have a spare which moment when I was turning over my $15 check thrown into the sea and even- made matters even worse, but also my sacred bus which really increased my faith in the system, Not! pass. (By the way, anyone finding a set of car keys What I don't understand is why they even charge tually appear on In Search Of, with a Megadeth key chain and a cheesy looking you to ride the bus. Considering how most of the in about 100 years as possible rope attached please contact me at the Press office.) bus drivers drive they should be paying us. I Losing my keys was Hell but that wasn't as big a decided to do a little investing so I went back maps to the lost treasure of pain in the butt as what I had to go through to get down the Traffic Office to ask exactly where our Capt. Kidd. a new bus pass. When I went down to the Traffic hard earned money went and if there was any way Office to see about getting a new pass the first we could avoid being charged for replacement thing they asked me for was my student I.D.num- passes. The answer to the first question is that it ber; the second thing was $15 to replace it. My goes toward paying the bus drivers and the staff of The others should be friend who was with me at the time asked if I had the traffic office and for maintenance of the busses. sent -to any money on me, I didn't. Then the schmuck on As for the second question, the answer was no. The Stony Brook Press the other side of the counter asked if I had any There is no way of avoiding the replacement fee, credit cards which I didn't. My next reaction was not even filing a "Lost and Found" report. What Rm 060 Student Union to leave and borrow fifty cents from a friend so I about credit cards receipts? The answer to that could get back to South P to meet my mom who question is also no. They won't accept credit card was bringing the spare key. receipts or canceled checks in order to skip having or e-mailed to: The next day I called Campus Security to see if to pay for a new pass. The reason for this is that [email protected] my keys had been found. No! Then I was told that when you purchase you bus pass you are entered if I filed a "Lost and Found" report and brought into the computer as having purchased one which March 27,1995 page 13 And A New Corvette Too! By Louis M. Moran at the check-out counter, you get taxed every time you Democrats, who love a big cushy government, should mail something (what precisely do you think a stamp have the best sense of humor in the country and they don't As you probably know, Newt Gingrich recently joked is'?), you get taxed every time you cross a toll bridge (the get Newt when he's making fun of them. If they can (that's right, joked) that the US Government should be injustice of having to pay to get into New Jersey is mon- attempt to force the teaching of anilingus, cunnilingus, fel- giving tax breaks on laptop computers. Democrats and umental), and if you are one of the unlucky ones who latio, and homosexuality to first graders (that was right here other such sundry liberal types were outraged by this claim dependents you get to pay more taxes at the end of in New York, wake up) they must be jokers. Democrats because they felt Newt Gingrich was slighting the poor. the year! I know right from wrong, and that's wrong. who must know as much about the way government runs Newt retracted his quip the same day and very much There are taxes you probably don't even know about. as anyone, have to be having the biggest laugh. Try to fuss was made over it as it was hot on the heels of Newt When you go to a restaurant you have to pay a hidden imagine the Democrats at their conventions.... Gingrich's mother recanting that Newt had once called - "food preparation" tax. There are luxury taxes on things "Wait, wait, get this...we're still making them all drive Hillary Clinton a bitch. An epitaph cast at her often, by like boats, and fast European cars. Here on Long Island fifty-five! Yeah, yeah, every time they ask to raise the people closer to her than Newt, I'm certain. we pay 8.5% sales tax. That is higher than some car limit, we threaten the states we'll take away the federal And I would love to get a tax break on the purchase of loans! That's eight and half cents on the dollar, rounded money and then we make up some statistic like 20% a laptop computer. I desperately need a laptop comput- up when necessary! more deaths occur at 65 miles per hour than at 55....I er and like most Americans cannot readily afford a lap- What on Earth do all these taxes pay for? Very impor- know, I know, cars are twenty times safer than they were top. Oh sure, I could get one...if I stopped paying the tant programs; like a way to make tape worms constipat- in the sixties...remember, remember'? They all had those rent for two months and didn't eat. A tax break would be ed at a cost of 2 million. Or how about a program that skinny Fiberglass belted tires, with the really crappy quite welcome here. made Congress more efficient that saved tax payers 136 brakes and NO seatbelts! Oh man, it's hard to believe Democrats show their inability to understand what. million at a cost of 300 million. A personal favorite is a they ever fell for that 55 miles an hour saves gas crap. Americans want again and again. In just this one exam-. 2 million dollar research program thats findings include The best part is at fifty five miles per hour all the emis- ple the Democrats show they have no sense of humor getting shot in the head will make victims stop breathing. sion controls we forced car makers to cram into the and no sense of what middle income America wants. Even local government is using tax dollars wisely; a two engine compartment-I know they can't even see their After all, if I'm not asking the government for a hand- hundred car parking garage was erected for federal sparkplugs-clogs up the exhaust system and makes the- out, getting aid or extra treatment; why can't I get a tax' employees whose numbers top twenty now and then. car run like garbage in five years! Just in time for them break on a laptop? If I am taking my forty hour plus All that and I can't get a tax break on my measly $2500 to buy a new one! Oh man 55 miles an hour is the best work week wages and heavily taxed savings money and' laptop? I really need a laptop. I swear if I get a laptop I will one we ever pulled off...." dropping it in an American store and being taxed heavi- never print out $185,000 worth of material I can't back up, I have to drive fifty five and I can't even laugh about ly on the two thousand dollar plus purchase, why like the US postal service did and then destroyed all of the it! I want a laptop. I want an IBM (American company) shouldn't I receive a tax break at the end of the year? envelopes bearing the Two Day Priority Mail slogan ThinkPad DX100, with 16 meg, a 10.5 inch active Imagine instead of just getting money handed to you because after all only 77% of the Two Day Priority Mail matrix screen, two quadruple speed CD Roms, a GIG for not working, or whatever reason, if you got tax cred- was getting there in two days. I promise not to write a 32 hard drive and a 28.8 fax modem.... I think a $7000 dol- its for your purchases. Wouldn't that be fantastic? What page pamphlet about how one should act during a bass lar purchase should get a tax break! I think spending that if you got bigger tax breaks for buying American? So fishing tournament. I will only use my laptop for good! kind of money (especially in NY...let's see that's $595 in now if I rush out and buy a Porsche, I get a tax break, With all that sort of crap going on in Washington DC, sales tax!) I should most assuredly get a tax break from but if I buy a Corvette I get a bigger tax break...hey you how can anyone there not have a sense of humor? It is the federal government. (Of course I can't afford that might rejuvenate America. What is the incentive to buy, unconscionable to take any of the things they do to us and I'll have to settle for the $800 doorstop model). If buy, buy, if all that's going to happen is I that I'll get seriously. No wonder Newt Gingrich says so many witty for no other reason than I am not stealing it, I'd have to ? taxed, taxed, taxed? things. You have to be a funny person to know what be working to afford it and it will make the country a Think about all the places you get taxed. You get taxed goes on in US Government and not laugh out loud. better (safer) place if I own one. I ,, _ _ For the wormy person who keeps calling our advertisers and forcing them to pull their ads because they are too afraid to deal with us personally; we only have one thing to say to you: YOU CAN'T BRING US DOWN!! Join the PRESS. And bask in the glow of eternal light which can't be dimmed by advertisers, who try to push their views down your throats. W E WILL NOT BE COMPROMI SED. FREEDOM UBER ALLES!! Staff meeting every Wednesday at 1:00pm, all are welcome to join us in room 060 of the Student Union. Or call us with your best intentions at 632-6451, or e-mail [email protected] _ The Stony Brook Press page 14 by Bruce Baldwin seems ridiculous, grotesque, and, too is a devise of Kellen's which media, the bluish hue, are projected perhaps, even deeply disturbing. puts him in subjective control of the upon the 'real' making poignant How often do our minds actually Ronald 0. Kellen's portraits vacil- scene, mediating between the view- commentary on our 'visual culture.' perceive all of what is visually late between being realistic and er and the painting. As the viewer, Looking, really looking, at a face received by our optic nerves? being theatrically unrealistic. His you cannot defer your attention to is not unlike repeating a word over Indeed, there always seems to be too ostensibly slap-dash manner of much information thrown at our applying the paint to the canvas minds to actually take it all in and draws attention to the hand of the deal with it intelligently. Consider artist as much as it creates an illu- the complexity of a human face. Its sionistic portrayal of his sitter. The subtle planes, imperfections, and light source he employs emanates individuality seem almost too over- from below the sitter's face which whelming to ponder. We look at the accentuates the planes of the face in faces of others most often out of a reverse order of how we are necessity, not choice (at least I do). accustomed to seeing them. This in Why is this? Is it that in our 'visual itself draws attention the sitter's culture' - where we are inundated face. This also creates a theatrical by predigested, kitsch, mass-media- mood not unlike someone retelling driven images, that place a mini- scary stories in front of a camp fire. mum of intellectual demand upon Indeed, one cannot help but feel their viewers - we are becoming that one of the portraits might say more than just ambivalent towards Boo! at any given moment. Perhaps the un-idealized? Faces on television the theatrical aura surrounding and in magazines cease to look real Kellen's portraits suggest that it is and imperfect, and real people, para- he who is telling a 'scary story.' doxically, seem too real and too With his brush and palate, Kellen imperfect to seem real to our mind's seems to not only depict the faces of eye - have they become his sitters, but also he seems to be grotesque? Its not surprising that embellishing them with his own much of modern art completely desire to make them appear more ignores the human face. In some grand, more interesting. The sitters' ways the human face has become a faces dominate their canvases so as forbidden fruit for artists; for those to fix the viewer's attention upon who can still look attentively at what the painted faces exclusively. This Alternntive Cinema at any details in the paintings except and over again until it sounds like S5tony Brook: Spring 9j either the face of the sitter or the a ridiculous utterance, pure gib- handling of the paint itself. The Alternative Cinema at Stony Brook provides a focus for student, faculty and staff cultural berish, as it were. A face, like text, and social life on campus, and a site for art and international film in the mid-Suffolk area. The However, the latter always leads to is somewhat of a symbol we read. Alternative Cinema, an activity of University Human Resources, isfunded by Student Union the former anyway. Even when When reading a text, we do not and Activities, FSA, Human Resources and the Graduate Student Organization. appreciating the seemingly incon- contemplate the shape, size, or col- gruent hues found smeared ors of the letters, rather, like faces, amongst the flesh tones, it is impos- they register almost automatically sible to fix upon the abstract shapes what they represent to our learned without reading them as keenly understanding of symbols. Two Director: Jan Svankmeyer representational. people who are said to look alike In these portraits, more informa- -- homonyms? - may actually 1989, Czechoslovakia, with English subtitles, color, 84 min. tion than just resemblance emerge look nothing alike if their faces from the canvases. For example, the were studied with thoughtful Master Czech animator (and mentor to the Brothers Quay) Jan Svankmeyer combines incongruent hues I mentioned attention. (Are people who seem techniques of animation and live action to lead us through this acclaimed surreal ver- above are not random, but, indeed, alike then synonymous?) Kellen's sion of Lewis Carroll's "Alice in Wonderland." Svankmeyer's outlandish imagination, engage the viewer in the task of looking at his subjects appears black humor, and appreciation for the surreal make this an unforgettable tour through extrapolating their significance. All emancipated from preconceived a dream labyrinth that's not meant for the kids. the faces reflect a kind of unnatural ideas of what the symbol of a face bluish hue as if the are watching or should look like. The 'gibberish' of April 11 are near television screens. Its like- Kellen's portraits - their incon- Films by the Brothers Quay & Jan Svankmeyer ly that a television placates a sitter gruent hues, abstract shapes, and and makes the process of portrai- painterly handling -signal that Jan Svankmeyer, Animator of Prague 27 min, 1990 ture less trying. Yet, Kellen does he has broken down the symbolic, Darkness, Light, Darkness 7 min, 1989, Jan Svankmeyer not omit this detail from the work. learned constructions of facial The Cabinet of Jan Svankmeyer 13 min, 1984, Brothers Quay In fact, he quite seamlessly incor- structures and 'unpacked' their porates this detail into the work. intrinsic characteristics as much as Epic of Gilgamesh 11 min, 1985, Brothers Quay This sets up an interesting dichoto- might be possible (since a com- Streets of Crocodiles 21 min, 1986, Brothers Quay my between watching and being pletely 'unlearned' depiction is Rehearsals For Extinct Anatomies 14 min, 1988, Brothers Quay watched, between the observer and impossible). the observed. The sitters are not However much Kellen's portrai- This animation programs begins with a documentary on master animator Svankmeyer, painfully posed, waiting to be ture seems a straightforward ply- followed by a claymation short of his. The dark, dreamlike and poetic images of the work released by the artist, rather, their ing of his trade, it behooves view- of the Brothers Quay cannot be described in simple summaries of their 4 short films attentions are drawn outside the ers to dismiss their preconcep- shown here. Fiercely original, their enigmatic work is both transfixing and moving. realm of the self-conscious process tions regarding portraiture and of being painted and fixed upon spend more than time actually The films will be shown in the Stony Brook Union Auditorium on another two-dimension representa- looking at the paintings than it Tuesday Evenings at 7:00 and 9:30 pm. Admission is $2.00. tion of reality. Indeed; traces of this takes to walk past them. r -- March 27,-1995 page 15 by Rachel S. Wexelbaum smash Earthworm underfoot when he is trapped The Earthworm worshippers knew where eggs for all student teachers neither hare nor there above ground baking in 'the sun, or if we rescue really came from, but as their conquerors were him from a rain puddle and put him back in the stronger, had better weapons and less intellect, it Spring has finally arrived in the Northern soil, Mother Nature will smile more warmly upon wasn't really worth arguing with them. On the Hemisphere. Humans and animals alike breathe us. Then she will see that we truly understand other hand, the children were getting all confused deeply, imagining the scent of fresh-mown grass, what spring means... about whom they should worship and the village flowers and leafy trees soon to come. Around the But now, a story. elders became concerned. One elder thought the world people will celebrate spring's fertility, cre- A long time ago, people did worship wisest thing would be to combine traditions-why ativity and bright colors to shake off the \\ . / Earthworm during the spring- couldn't you worship bunnies and worms at the doldrums of winter. For mai y asked him to fer- same time? The village elders brought this up to ebration occurs during Easte le Earth and spread their people and the majority accepted it. They holiday which stems from p through the soil so agreed to find a way to worship Earthworm and traditions commemorati e crops would grow Rabbit at the same time. rebirth, children, love and tli >lentifully in rich Eventually their wayward shaman came up with great green earth. Cute fuzzy surroundings. On a solution. He rattled his medicine stick and cack- animals like rabbits, chick- the first day of led, "Make bunnies and fill them with earthworms. ies and duckies are wor- spring each of the That's fertility! That's dreams come true, and pow- shiped as symbols of fertil- farmers in the erful medicine! The Goddess will be pleased." ity and rebirth. People village would All night the villagers worked hard, building decorate their homes with find an earth- bunnies and filling them with earthworms. They bunnies, plastic day-glo worm, pick him scattered their sculptures throughout the village, eggs and green tinsel to up, make a wish and even put one on an invading warrior's stoop. show their reverence for for a good har- Unfortunately, some people see the blending of Mother Nature. vest, kiss the traditions as blasphemy-enough reason to anni- The Great Mothei earthworm for hilate an entire people. This is why the cult of the although flattered by o ood fortune and Earthworm did not survive, but chocolate covered intentions, is disannointed id him harck to the marshmallow bunnies did. us. She wants us to contemplate Earth with a mission. the Earth on a deeper level, and rec- Then something hap- ognize some of her more humble chil- pened. Nomadic tribes con- dren for their contributions to our springtime quered new territory and subjugat- euphoria. This means going out into our gardens, ed the natives, enforcing strange new customs or a field, or a vacant lot, and thanking the lowly upon them. One of these strange customs was earthworm for aerating and fertilizing our soil. worshipping the rabbit during springtime because Without Earthworm' there would ,be no grass, of its prolific sexual nature. Rabbit, according to flowers, trees or crops of any kind and we would the invaders' folklore, was responsible for inspir- have a gray, sterile wasteland. Poor Earthworm ing other animals to get down and dirty and bear cannot see or hear what his work amounts to offspring. Eventually this belief evolved into above ground, but someone should tell him to Rabbit hiding eggs under chickens, ducks and keep up the good work. If we resist the urge to other places for people to find and ponder. Of Kings, Love and Aja: The Demented Review Of Two New Albums by Ted Swedalla a breathy whisper to a full force gale in Lil' Ennio. song on the album, Polly Jean really shines. A rock- When she claims "I'm your faith healer," in the ing acoustic tune with strings, not the strings that Recently two of my favorite three women in rock, title track, you can't keep yourself from falling to she usually includes on songs, dissident and pain who are not known heroin addicts, released new your knees and praying for Tanya to come and lick causing, but an orchestration worthy of John Paul albums. Tanya Donelly and her band Belly with your forehead. Later when she says "I'd like to see Jones. King and the incredible PJ Harvey's To Bring You you naked" you can't help tearing off your clothes She co-produced this album with Flood (the guy My Love. I was going to review them and compare and exposing yourself to your CD player. who makes U2 sound good.) Together they cut all them to Steely Dan's Aja, but I figured I would be The album only gets stronger as it goes along, hit- extraneous things and let the simplicity boil out in the only one who understood how I came up with ting its high point at Untitled and Unsung, and Judas two things. Her voice, which ranges from satanic that connection, so I decided to kill that. My Heart, is as brilliant as any closing song could to wispy breaths of life, and her guitar playing, Belly's sophomore effort King is everything that be. Not only pick up the album, but go to the con- grinding and hazy. But they don't let the two inter- their debut Star tried to be during its moments of cert. Saturday April 8th 7:30 at Roseland with fere with each other, songs are either guitar driven brilliance (Feed the Tree and Slow Dog.) Tanya com- Superchunk opening. [Ed. Note - We are trying to get or led by her voice. The exception may be Long bines the best of her two former bands, Throwing a whole lot of people to go, so if you are interestedyou Snake Moan, a typical PJ song with lyrics so full of Muses and The Breeders. This is apparent on two can leave a message with us, or stop by.] sexual double entendre, even 90 year old nuns, early songs, Seal My Fate and Red. Both songs start who only speak German, would get damp. During off with the slow tempos and restrained chaos of With To Bring You My Love, PJ Harvey's third the song PJ explodes "it's my voodoo working" Throwing Muses songs, then jump into power album, she turns away from the mind-numbing before ending with screams of "moan." chords and melodic lyrics found on Breeder riffs that built her last two discs, Rid Of Me and the The first video from the album Down By The records. Other songs on this record follow this pat- amazing Dry. She expands her range in music, but Water, has her shaking her groove thang all over tern, Superconnected and Now They'll Sleep. still keeps her distinctive growls and moans. the place. Then whispering "little fish big fish Unlike their debut, on King, Belly wastes no time The title track opens the album and it moves like swimming in the water" while a fuzzy guitar is on drippy college poetry ballads or fragments a train struggling to get up a long hill. Slow and layered by shakers and wood blocks, not the usual (songs that last under two minutes.) Here they rip deliberate, she "sings like Satan" someone com- PJ instrumentation. down the walls with their Marshall's and bash mented. That isn't to far off, she then switches into An outstanding album all the way through, so pick your skull in with catchy one liners that'll have a heavy breathing moan on Meet Ze Monsta. Which it up or miss out on what is sure to be one of the you singing along wishing to be Tanya, like "You uses an instrument too often overlooked on rock years 10 best. Now only if we could get tour dates know what shape my breathe will take before I let albums, the whistle. for her, she was on tour with REM, but their drum- it out." Her voice is also in top form, moving from When the album rolls into Come On Billy, the best mers head exploded and the tour was canceled. DYIIII·~ AIic oLuaLIy DI-UUI rrtes page io