Prayers for the Critically Ill & Dying

Prayers for the Critically Ill and Dying

Prayers for…

General Prayers Prayers for the Critically Ill Prayers for One Who Is Near Death Death After Dementia Death After Mental Illness Removal of Life Support Death of a Child Death of an Infant/Newborn Stillbirth Suicide Prayers for a Victim of Violence Sudden Death Scripture Readings Prayer at the Time of Death

Dear Friend in the Faith;

May God's peace and strength be with you.

By virtue of the fact that you are reading this pamphlet, you may well be in the difficult setting of critical health or pending death; of yourself or a loved one. In the midst of this time we are reminded that “in life and in death we belong to God.” May such trust be your companion; may God be your refuge and strength.

This collection of prayers and scripture is a gift from your church and is sent with our prayers. They may be used for private prayer or in the quiet of one person reading to a loved one. The concluding order of worship is intended for use by family and friends at a time when death is imminent. Such a service around a bed in a hospital or at home with hospice care can assist the dying and the loved ones to face the truth of the moment and also embrace the love and comfort of God. The service can be led by a pastor, deacon, or family member.

Also, please note that the church has prepared a guide entitled “Planning a Funeral or Memorial Service” that may be of assistance to you. You will find this online at www.annapolis- presbyterian.com or in print form available at church.

May the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you.

Blessings, First Presbyterian Church

3 General Prayers

Lament Psalm Seven O God, you’ve allowed death to take him away, leaving me alone in the chill dawn of unfinished love. What could you have been thinking?

Ungiven gifts pile about me. Unsung songs remain trapped in my throat. Unsaid words lie rotting in my mouth, and I sit staring down a lifetime of unlived days, for love didn’t leave when death arrived.

God, what will I do with the unfinished love? It wells up within me with nowhere to go, and I am bursting with the pain of it.

Come to me, O Comforter, come to me. Hold me against the pain for just awhile so that I might catch my breath.

Come to me, O Comforter, and give me peace.

Ann Weems

4 Death and Dying

Preparing for what may be just ahead

Tonight, as on other nights, I’m walking alone through the valley of fear. O God, I pray that You will hear me, for You alone know what is in my heart. Lift me out of the valley of despair and set my soul free. Amen. Ann Wadey

An Irish Prayer

Bright King of Friday and Father Almighty, Make a roof for me by night and guard me by day. If you are to bring me along the path I have never seen before, Make it a pathway for me to the life of glory.

Prayers from Celtic Daily Prayer: Prayers and Readings from the Northumbria Community

Death and Eternity

O God, early in the morning I cry to you. Help me to pray And to concentrate my thoughts on you: I cannot do this alone.

5 In me there is darkness, But with you there is light; I am lonely, but you do not leave me; I am feeble in heart, but with you there is help; I am restless, but with you there is peace. In me there is bitterness, but with you there is patience; I do not understand your ways, But you know the way for me . . .

Restore me to liberty, And enable me so to live now That I may answer before you and before me. Lord, whatever this day may bring, Your name be praised.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

In a Personal Crisis

Write your blessed name, O Lord, upon my heart, there to remain so indelibly engraven, that no prosperity, no adversity, shall ever move me from your love. Be to me a strong tower of defense, a comforter in tribulation, a deliverer in distress, a very present help in trouble, and a guide to heaven through the many temptations and dangers of this life. Amen.

Thomas à Kempis (c. 1380-1471)

6 A General Prayer

O Lord, support us all the day long, until the shadows lengthen and the evening comes and the busy world is hushed, and the fever of life is over, and our work is done. Then, in your mercy, grant us a safe lodging, and a holy rest, and peace at the last; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Book of Common Worship (1993)

Prayers for the Critically Ill

During an Illness

You are medicine for me when I am sick. You are my strength when I need help. You are life itself when I fear death. You are the way when I long for heaven. You are light when all is dark. You are my food when I need nourishment! Amen.

Ambrose of Milan (340-397)

After a Long Illness

Eternal God, our life is a fleeting shadow that does not endure. Our years pass quickly, our days are few and full of trouble. We thank you that (name) no longer has to suffer pain or fear, grappling with death, fighting for life; and that for him/her limitations are ended, weakness is overcome, and death itself is conquered. As he/she passes from our earthly sight, we thank you for the years of his/her presence among us. And while we feel the pain of the parting, we rejoice in the faith that he/she has gone to be with you, for in your presence is the fullness of joy, at your right hand are pleasures for evermore. Bless those who had the care of him/her, especially the doctors, nurses and technicians. Guide and prosper all who are engaged in medical research: may they never lose heart in their search to discover the way of health and healing. Grant that by their vision and courage we may advance in our understanding of the world and be better able to help those in need. Amen.

The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England

For Those in Mental Distress

Mighty God, in Jesus Christ you deal with spirits that darken our minds and set us against ourselves. Give peace to those who are torn by conflict, cast down, or lost in the world of illusion. By your power, transform our minds back to confidence and love. Tame unruly forces within us, and bring us to your truth, so that we may accept ourselves as your beloved children in Jesus Christ. Amen.

Mental Illness Worship Resources, PC(USA)

For One Newly Diagnosed with a Mental Illness

God of compassion and love, you are our present help in times of trouble. We ask that you let (name) know of your presence with him/her. Strengthen him/her that he/she may face this illness. Comfort him/her as he/she accepts the losses, rejoice with him/her as he/she finds new life and meaning. Grand (name) the course he/she will need for treatment. Lord of peace, be with us all, and give us peace at all times and in every way. Amen.

Mental Illness Worship Resources, PC(USA)

9 For One Who has Attempted Suicide

Gracious God, your Son came among us not to condemn but to save. He taught us that nothing can separate us from your love. Release us from the fear that we are worthless, and stay our hands from self-destruction. Uphold (name) with your love. Fill him/her with hope and with trust in your guidance, that your power may make her/him new through the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.

Mental Illness Worship Resources, PC(USA)

Prayers for One Who Is Near Death

Facing Death with Courage

Lord, So strange to us This doorway labeled death! – a door of darkness still closed to protect us from the brilliance of eternal life; a final obstacle to the fullness of your presence.

We stand together at the threshold, (name), and I who pray this prayer for this your child.

10 Give courage, Lord, for this uncharted journey, peacefulness at parting from all that must be left behind, and an inner vision of invitation for all that is better that awaits.

And I must also release (name) from my own flawed embrace to your precious and perfect presence. Soon enough, I too must follow, placing my footsteps in those of the Christ Himself. Amen.

Celtic Daily Prayer

At the Time of Death

Into your hands, O merciful Savior, we commend your servant (name). Acknowledge, we pray, a sheep of your own fold, a lamb of your own flock, a sinner of your own redeeming. Enfold him/her in the arms of your mercy, in the blessed rest of everlasting peace and in the glorious company of the saints in light. Amen.

The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England

11 Death After Dementia

One Who Has Died After a Dementia or Similar Condition

Loving God, we have seen this day from afar. For so many days (name) has seemed remote from us, and we have lost her as she seemed to lose us. Yet you have known us all, and you have kept us with her in your eternal love. Welcome home the one we mourn, the friend who became a stranger. Grant to her the recognition of your face and that life which never fades. These things we ask through Jesus Christ, your Son, our Lord. Amen.

Paul Sheppy

Death After Mental Illness

One Who Has Struggled with a Troubled Mind

Gracious God, in you we find the fullness of life and the ground of our hope. Give peace, we pray, to us and to those dear to us. (Name) struggled in life with a troubled mind and anguished spirit. Now, in death, we commend her/him to you. Welcome her/him and grant her/him your peace. And, in our praying, doubting, and questioning give us such confidence in your mercy that we may entrust our lives to you and embrace the gifts that you give to us. These things we pray in the name of Jesus who knows our troubles and leads us home. Amen.

William L. Hathaway

12 Removal of Life Support

For Use When a Life-Support System is Withdrawn

God of compassion and love, you have breathed into us the breath of life and have given us the exercise of our minds and wills. In our frailty we surrender all life to you from whom it came, trusting in your gracious promises; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Into your hands, O merciful Savior, we commend your servant (name). Acknowledge, we humbly beseech you, a sheep of your own fold, a lamb of your own flock, a sinner of your own redeeming. Receive him/her into the arms of your mercy, into the blessed rest of everlasting peace, and into the glorious company of the saints in light. Amen.

Book of Common Worship

Death of a Child

The Death of a Child

We had so many hopes, so many fears, there has been so much joy, so much sorrow, and now all our words seem empty.

13 What we want we cannot have; and what we thought was promised has been taken from us.

Silence

O God, do not let our pain turn to the bitterness that devours us and kills us. We thank you for all that was good. Help us to find peace in troubled times, and light in our darkness. These things we ask through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen. Paul Sheppy

Death of an Infant/Newborn

After a Short Life

Lord our God, you give and you take away. You blessed us through the gift of (name), who is now taken from us and whose loss we mourn. Help us, through our tears and pain, to glimpse your hand at work to bring blessing out of grief. To you be glory for ever. Amen.

The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England

14 Stillbirth

Liturgy for a Stillborn Child

O God, as (name of child) was cradled in the womb, cradle her/him and hold her/him so that as we let her/him go, we may know that he/she has gone from our loving presence into yours forever. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

The Pattern of Our Days: Worship in the Celtic Tradition from the Iona Community, edited by Kathy Galloway

Suicide After a Suicide

Eternal God and Father, look in mercy on those who remember (name) before you. Let not the manner of his/her death cloud the good memories of his/her life. For (name) the trials of this world are over and death is past. Accept from us all that we feel even when words fail; deliver us from despair and give us strength to meet the days to come in the faith of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England

Prayers for a Victim of Violence

After a Tragic Loss

O God, help me to live with my grief!

Death has taken my beloved, and I feel that I cannot go on. My faith is shaken; my mind keeps asking: Why? Why does joy end in sorrow? Why does love exact its price in tears? Why?

O God, help me to live with my grief!

Help me to accept the mystery of life. Help me to see that even if my questions were answered, even if I did know why, the pain would be no less, the loneliness would remain bitter beyond words. Still my heart would ache.

O God, help me to triumph over my grief! Help me to endure this night of anguish. Help me to walk through the darkness with faith in tomorrow. Give me comfort; give me courage; turn me to deeds that bless the living.

O God, help me to triumph over my grief.

Gates of Prayer: The New Union Prayerbook

16 After a Violent Death

Merciful God, hear the cries of our grief, for you know the anguish of our hearts. It is beyond our understanding and more than we can bear. Accept our prayer that as (name) has been released from this world's cruelty so may he/she be received into your safe hands and secure love. We pray that justice may be done and that we may treasure the memory of his/her life more than the manner of his/her death. For Christ's sake. Amen.

The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England

Sudden Death

One Who Has Died Suddenly

O God, we are stunned. We cannot take it in. It seems unreal and yet all too real. Save us from simply blaming ourselves and others; bear with us the pain of what has happened; and give us the healing of wounds that now run deep. We make our prayer through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen.

Paul Sheppy

17 After a Sudden Death

God of hope, we come to you in shock and grief and confusion of heart. Help us to find peace in the knowledge of your loving mercy to all your children, and give us light to guide us out of our darkness into the assurance of your love, in Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England

Scripture Reading (New Revised Standard Bible)

Psalm 23

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside still waters; he restores my soul. He leads me in right paths for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I fear no evil; for you are with me; your rod and your staff— they comfort me.

18 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord my whole life long.

Psalm 121

I lift up my eyes to the hills— from where will my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade at your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time on and for evermore.

19 Hebrews 12:1-2

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and the sin that clings so closely, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of our faith, who for the sake of the joy that was set before him endured the cross, disregarding its shame, and has taken his seat at the right hand of the throne of God.

Romans 8:31-35, 37-39

What then are we to say about these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not withhold his own Son, but gave him up for all of us, will he not with him also give us everything else? Who will bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? It is Christ Jesus, who died, yes, who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes for us. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will hardship, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? . . . No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

John 3:16-17

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. Indeed, God did not send the Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

20 Prayer at the Time of Death (Book of Common Worship, 1993)

Greeting

The pastor or an elder, deacon, family member, or other member of the community of faith greets those present:

The Lord be with you. And also with you.

Scripture Sentence

Then one of the following verses from scripture is said:

1 Romans 14:8

If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s.

2 Psalm 46:1

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

21 Prayer

This or a similar prayer is said:

Gracious God, look on (name), whom you created in your image, and claimed as your own through baptism. Comfort her/him with the promise of life eternal made sure in the death and resurrection of your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Lord’s Prayer

Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever. Amen.

Scripture Readings Choose from earlier selections (page 18-20).

Prayers of Commendation

Lord Jesus Christ, deliver your servant (name) from all evil, and set him/her free from every bond; that he/she may rest with all your saints in the joy of your eternal home for ever and ever. Amen.

22 2

Almighty God, by rising from the grave, Jesus Christ conquered death and leads us to eternal life. Watch over our brother/sister (name). Give him/her a vision of that home within your love where pain is gone and death shall be no more; through Jesus Christ the Lord of life. Amen.

Prayer for Family and Friends

One of the following, or a similar prayer, may be said for the family and friends of the dying. Those present may be invited to offer other prayers.

Almighty God, our creator and redeemer, you are our comfort and strength. You have given us our sister/brother (name) to know and to love in our pilgrimage on earth. Uphold us now as we entrust her/him to your boundless love and eternal care. Assure us that not even death can separate us from your infinite mercy. Deal graciously with us in our anguish, that we may truly know your sure consolation and learn to live in confident hope of the resurrection; through your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

23 2

Lord God, look kindly upon us in our sorrow as this life is taken from us, and gather our pain into your peace. Be with us in our grieving, and overcome all our doubts. Awaken our gratitude for your gifts of love and tenderness. As we are able to receive them, teach us the lessons of life that can be learned in death. We pray through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Blessing

A blessing, such as the following, may be given.

The Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord be kind and gracious to you. The Lord look upon you with favor and give you peace. Amen.

This pamphlet was prepared in 2010 by Deacon Edward Hester, Elder Connie MacDonald Scott, Seminary Intern Katie Cashwell, and Pastor William L. Hathaway.

Please note that the church has prepared a guide entitled, “Planning a Funeral or Memorial Service” that may be of assistance. This item is online at www.annapolis-presbyterian.com or in print form available at church.

25 Permission for use of prayers is as follows:

“Preparing for what may be just ahead,” “An Irish Prayer” and “Facing Death with Courage” from Preparing for What May be Just Ahead, Celtic Daily Prayer © The Northumbria Community, used with permission.

"After a Tragic Loss" in Gates of Prayer: The New Union Prayer Book, edited by Chaim Stern. Copyright ©1975 by Central Conference of American Rabbis. Used by permission of Central Conference of American Rabbis. All rights reserved.

“For Those in Mental Distress,” “For One Newly Diagnosed with a Mental Illness” and “For One Who has Attempted Suicide” from Mental Heath Ministries, www.MentalHealthMinistries.net. Used with permission.

Prayers by Paul Sheppy from In Sure and Certain Hope: Liturgies, Prayers and Readings for Funerals and Memorials (Abingdon Press, 2004).

“Liturgy for a Stillborn Child” from The Pattern of Our Days: Worship in the Celtic Tradition from the Iona Community, Kathy Galloway, ed.

“After a Long Illness,” “At the Time of Death,” “After a Short Life,” “After a Suicide, “After a Violent Death,” and “After a Sudden Death” are from Common Worship: Pastoral Services (2000), copyright © The Archbishops' Council of the Church of England, 2000.

FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH 171 Duke of Gloucester Street Annapolis, MD 21401

Phone 410.267.8705 www.annapolis-presbyterian.com [email protected]