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Home , Claire Danes, Dermot Mulroney

GRIEF RESOURCES

BOOKS

Widow/Widowers Loss

1. Healing A Spouse’s Grieving Heart, Alan D. Wolfelt, PhD

2. How to Survive the Loss of a Love, Colgrove, Bloomfield, & McWilliams

3. I’m Grieving as Fast As I Can, Linda Feinberg (young widow and widower)

4. When a Lifemate Dies, S. Heinlein, G. Brumett, & J. Tibbals

5. Widow to Widow, Genevieve Ginsburt (myths about grieving)

Parent Loss - Adults

1. A Mother Loss Workbook, D. Hambrook & G. Eisenberg (Coping with the death of a mother)

2. Death Benefits–How Losing a Parent Can Change an Adult’s Life–For the Better, Jeanne Safer, PhD.

3. Losing a Parent: A Guide to a New Way of Living, Alexandra Kennedy

4. Losing Your Parents, Finding Yourself, Victoria Secunda (change after the death of a parent)

5. Motherless Daughters, Hope Edelman

6. On Grieving the Death of a Father, Harold Ivan Smith

7. When Parents Die, Edward Myers

8. When Parents Die: Learning to Live with the Loss of a Parent, Rebecca Adams

Multiple forms of Loss

1. Angel Catcher: A Journal of Loss and Remembrance, Katy & Amy Eldon

2. Beyond Grief, Carol Staudacher

3. A Grief Like No Other – Surviving the Violent Death of Someone You Love, Kathleen O’Hara, M.A.

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

4. The Grief Recovery Handbook, John W. James & Russell Friedman

5. Healing Your Grieving Heart, Alan D. Wolfelt, PhD

6. How to Go on Living When Someone You Love Dies, Therese Rando (suggestions to aid in the grieving process)

7. Necessary Losses, Judith Viorst (how we grow and change through losses)

8. Tear Soup, Pat Schwelbert

Child Loss

1. Angelic Presence, Cathi Lammert and Sue Friedeck

2. Empty Arms – Coping with Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Death, Sherokee Ilse

3. Gone But Not Lost – Grieving the Death of a Child, David W. Wiersbe

4. The Grieving Garden, Suzanne Redfern and Susan K. Gilbert (22 parents share their stories about living with the death of a child [young child or adult child])

5. O Susan! – Looking Forward with Hope After the Death of a Child, James W. Angell

6. Recovering From the Loss of a Child, Katherine Fair Donnelly

Death by Suicide

1. Suicide Survivors’ Handbook - A Guide for the Bereaved and Those Who Wish to Help Them, Trudy Carlson

2. My Son…My Son…A Guide to Healing After Death, Loss, or Suicide, Iris Bolton

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

MULTIMEDIA

1. The Gifts of Grief: A by Nancee Sobonya. The Gifts of Grief asks a timely and important question - How do we transform the tragedy of our losses into a life-altering experience that deepens and enriches our lives? This 52-minute film invites the viewer to discover for themselves the possibility of true gifts emerging from their own losses. This is a unique film about the possibility of another side of suffering, told through the personal and inspiring stories with people who have confronted remarkable losses and have found a way to transform their grief into a greater appreciation of life. As we watch these people grapple with difficult emotional and spiritual pain with a mixture of grace, dignity, fear, vulnerability, soulfulness and courage, we are asked to open to our own pain honestly and directly and discover what lessons death and grief have taught us. We explore the possibility that grief while very painful, is one of the closely guarded keys to true transformation and joy.

2. A Secret Best Not Kept. A documentary film that takes a close look at everyone touched by suicide, depression, and loss. Web site: sayitoutloud.com

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

WEB SITES

1. www.growthhouse.org info and referral services; related to end of life, grief resources

2. www.widowNet.org info, resources and chat rooms for widow(er)s

3. www.dougy.org info and articles on children’s grief that can be accessed

4. www.compassionbooks.com books on many kinds of loss for all ages

5. www.agast.org for grandparents when a grandchild has died

6. www.missfoundation.org support for grieving families when a child has died

7. www.griefwatch.com information, resources, memorial products, links

8. www.goodgriefresources.com a wide variety of resources for general grieving

9. www.babysteps.com child loss

10. www.groww.com information, email to heaven, chat rooms, message boards, resources

11. www.bereavedparentsusa.org information for families, regardless of age of child

12. www.pomc.com support, education, advocacy and awareness for families of murder victims

13. www.taps.org support for families of military death

14. www.afsp.org website for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention; provides support, information, and awareness events

15. www.friendsforsurvival.org a national outreach program for survivors of suicide loss

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

Films:

Widow/ers

To Gillian on her 37th Birthday(1996) PG-13 Two years after his wife, Gillian (), died in a boating accident, David (Peter Gallagher) still fantasizes his wife is alive and talks with her "ghost" on the beach every night. Meanwhile, family problems crop up, and Gillian's sister threatens to sue for custody of David's 16-year-old daughter, Rachel (Claire Danes). Things come to a head when the family gathers on Nantucket to celebrate Gillian's birthday.

Shadowlands(1993) PG A divorced woman (Debra Winger) and well-known children's author CS Lewis (Anthony Hopkins) become romantically entwined in this story about their ill-fated May- December love affair. This big-screen adaptation of William Nicholson's play is based on Lewis's real life. [widower and test of faith]

An Unfinished Life(2005) PG-13 When her husband dies, Jean Gilkyson (Jennifer Lopez) moves herself and her daughter, Griff (Becca Gardner), into the Wyoming home of her estranged father-in-law, steely rancher Einar (Robert Redford), even though they don't get along. Buried in grief, Einar can't get over the death of his only son, while Jean struggles to make sense of her new life. Over time, though, the two learn to move on through the power of forgiveness.

Ghost(1990) PG-13 Gothamites Sam (Patrick Swayze) and Molly (Demi Moore) see their romance shattered when a street thug kills Sam during a mugging. A spectral Sam finds himself in a world where only sassy pseudopsychic Oda Mae () can hear him. He learns, with Oda Mae's help, that a rival masking a money-laundering scheme arranged Sam's death and that Molly is in jeopardy. Working through Oda Mae, Sam tries to warn Molly before she suffers his fate.

Always(1989) PG Director Steven Spielberg delivers an old-fashioned romantic adventure, as firefighting Richard Dreyfuss perishes in the line of duty and comes back from the beyond to watch over his replacement (Brad Johnson) and his true love (). Exciting, romantic and featuring Audrey Hepburn's final screen appearance, Always reaffirms the adage "What you give away, you keep forever."

P.S. I Love You(2007) PG-13 Holly Kennedy (Hilary Swank), a young widow living in New York, has just lost her beloved husband Gerry (Gerard Butler) to a brain tumor. Inconsolable, Holly finds that Gerry left for her a series of letters to help cope with the grief. As months pass, Holly discovers new messages from Gerry encouraging her to go on living. And while Holly's fear the letters will mire her in the past, they, in fact, give her strength for the future.

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

About Schmidt(2002) R When insurance actuary Warren Schmidt (Jack Nicholson) retires and his wife dies, he looks for life's meaning on a road trip to his daughter's (Hope Davis) upcoming wedding to a waterbed salesman (Dermot Mulroney). But Warren can't seem to get anything right. En route to the wedding, he shares his life through letters with a Tanzanian boy he's sponsoring for 73 cents a day … and soon, Warren discovers renewed purpose.

The Shipping News(2001) R Distraught after the disappearance of his estranged wife, Quoyle's (Kevin Spacey) long-lost aunt () convinces him to move with his daughter to their ancestral home in Newfoundland. Here, where life is rough and secrets are many, Quoyle lands a job as a reporter for the local paper. Now, a past is emerging, a mystery is unfolding and life is awakening. Based on the Pulitzer Prize-winning novel by E. Annie Proulx.

My Life(1993) PG-13 Advertising executive Michael Keaton has it all: a beautiful, pregnant wife (), a great job, a stately house … and three months to live. In this affecting drama, Keaton tries to make up for lost time and come to terms with the inevitable end of his life. Screenwriter Bruce Joel Rubin (Ghost) makes his directing debut here.

Bonneville(2006) PG , Joan Allen and star in this road trip yarn, which follows three friends on a journey across the West after one of them is widowed. Along the way, they learn a thing or two about themselves, one another and life. Powerful performances drive home the themes of friendship and female solidarity, while the awe-inspiring landscapes of the American Southwest convey a true sense of carpe diem.

Parent Loss

The Barbarian Invasions(2003) R In this Oscar-winning drama, fifty-ish Remy (Remy Girard) is divorced and hospitalized in Montreal. His ex-wife, Louise, asks their estranged son, Sebastien, to come home from London (where he now lives) as a show of support for his father. As soon as he arrives, Sebastien makes the impossible happen, using his contacts and disrupting the health care system in every way possible. [father has terminal illness; conflict with adult son]

Duma(2004) PG This family drama explores the bonds of friendship between man and beast. In this case, a young boy whose father has died, (Alexander Michaletos), befriends a cheetah named Duma and commits a true act of selfless love: He traverses the southern region of Africa, a long and difficult journey, just so he can help his pal return to his one true home -- the wild. Although he may never see Duma again, Xan discovers that love lingers in spite of distance.

Life as a House(2001) R Faced with a diagnosis of terminal cancer, George (Kevin Kline) decides to construct a beautiful new house on his land overlooking the Pacific ocean, while at the same time trying to connect with his estranged son (Hayden Christensen). Kristin Scott Thomas and Mary Steenburgen co-star in a dramedy that speaks eloquent volumes about the fragility -- and resilience -- of the human condition.

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

Brother Bear (2003) G In Disney's animated adventure, the son () of an Indian chief killed by a bear vows vengeance but is transformed by spirits into the very thing he sought to slay. Seeing the world through a bear's eyes, the young man learns valuable lessons about the cycle of life.

Finding Neverland(2004) PG Peter Pan and the denizens of Neverland have captured the hearts and minds of J.M. Barrie's readers. But how did the imaginative author ever envision a world so wondrous yet perilous? plays Barrie, a writer inspired by genius and dedicated to seeing his vision come to life onstage at the Duke of York's Theatre in 1904 London. co- stars in this magical film that nabbed seven Oscar nominations and won Best Original Score. [Mother dies and four young sons grieve.]

The Family Stone(2005) PG-13 Although their relationship works in the city, things begin to fall apart for young Manhattanites Everett (Dermot Mulroney) and Meredith () when they visit the 'burbs for the holidays. In fact, Sarah's first meeting with Everett's bohemian parents ( and Craig T. Nelson) proves so traumatic that she has to call in her sister (Claire Danes) for reinforcements -- a move that only makes Christmas more complicated. [A sub-plot concerns the mother’s death and grieving adult children.]

Two Weeks(2006) R Four grown siblings return to their North Carolina hometown to visit their mother () on her deathbed from ovarian cancer. Each handles the situation differently: Emily (Julianne Nicholson) devours self-help books; Keith (Ben Chaplin) floats through events in a Zen cloud; Barry (Thomas Cavanagh) won't stop working; and Matthew (Glenn Howerton) seems disengaged. This poignant comedy is based on writer-director Steve Stockman's personal experience.

Fly Away Home(1996) PG This delightful children's movie, inspired by a true story, serves up thrills and adventure along with subtle messages about family ties and independence. When 13-year-old Amy Alden () adopts a flock of orphaned Canada geese, she sets out to teach them survival skills. Before long, Amy and her inventor dad (Jeff Daniels) take to the skies in homemade ultralight aircraft to help the gaggle migrate 500 miles to freedom. [Sub-plot about Amy’s mother’s death.]

Ponette(1996) NR

When her mother dies in a car accident, 4-year-old Ponette (Victoire Thivisol) is left physically and emotionally scarred and in the care of her grief-stricken father. Sent to live with family for a while, Ponette sullenly navigates a world made up mostly of children's faces and slowly comes to terms with her loss. Thivisol's powerful, haunting performance earned her a Best Actress award at the Venice Film Festival in 1996.

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

Adult Child or Young Child

Surrender, Dorothy(2006) NR After her daughter Sara (Alexa Davalos) perishes in an auto accident, bereaved mother Natalie Swedlow (Diane Keaton) discovers a side of Sara that Natalie never knew. Looking for answers, healing and closure, Natalie journeys to their summer retreat, where she spends time with Sara's friends, including her childhood chum Adam (Tom Everett Scott). Peter Riegert and Lauren German provide support in this poignant made-for-TV drama.

In the Bedroom(2001) R Set in a tranquil town on the Maine coast, In the Bedroom tells the story of a couple (Sissy Spacek and Tom Wilkinson) whose teenage son () is involved in a love affair with a single mother (Marisa Tomei). When the relationship comes to a sudden and tragic end, the boy's parents must face their worst nightmare and embark on a dark, dangerous psychological journey. Spacek and Wilkinson turn in stunning performances.

In America(2002) PG-13 Academy Award-winning director Jim Sheridan brings authenticity and grit to this heartwarming drama about an Irish family whose child dies then start life anew in early- 1980s America. With their two surviving daughters in tow, Johnny (Paddy Considine) and Sarah () leave Ireland and head to New York so Johnny can pursue an acting career. What follows is a series of adventures, both comical and terrifying, as they struggle to make the most of their new life.

Terms of Endearment(1983) PG

Mothers are from Mars, and daughters are from Venus in this warm, offbeat story adapted from Larry McMurtry's novel. Director James L. Brooks seamlessly tells the story of a mother and daughter whose lives are changed by the men they love and their abiding love for each other. [Sub-plot about adult daughter’s death.]

Steel Magnolias(1989) PG

The lives of a tight-knit group of Louisiana women intersect at Truvy's (Dolly Parton) salon in this Oscar- nominated comedic tearjerker from director Herbert Ross. M'Lynn (Sally Field) survives her daughter Shelby's () wedding, only to face Shelby's risky choice to have a baby. Ouiser (Shirley MacLaine), Clairee (Olympia Dukakis) and Annelle (Daryl Hannah) round out the group that proves that with friends, you can survive anything.

Revised 4/5/2020 GRIEF RESOURCES

Elders

Cookie's Fortune(1999) PG-13 "Cookie" Orcutt (), salt of the earth and cornerstone of her small Southern town, leaves a terrible void as well as a huge fortune when she dies. As her two estranged, greedy nieces ( and ) angle for the estate, Cookie's man Friday (Charles Dutton) and grandniece (Liv Tyler) attempt to unravel the intrigue surrounding Cookie's fortune. [elder death]

Harold and Maude(1971) PG A self-absorbed, death-obsessed teen (Bud Cort) and a geriatric, high-on-life widow (Ruth Gordon) find love in this comical cult favorite. Hassled by his domineering mother (Vivian Pickles) to play the dating game, the morbid Harold would rather attend funerals, which is where he meets the feisty Maude. The seemingly mismatched pair forms a bond that turns into a highly unconventional -- but ultimately satisfying -- romance.

The Sixth Sense(1999) PG-13 Some kids have imaginary friends. Cole (Haley Joel Osment) does them one better: He lives in a world beyond imagination, filled with ghosts and madness. Bruce Willis is the empathic child psychiatrist who tries to heal the child, only to find that the poltergeists are not of this world and the problem may be his own. Tightly wound and filled with twists, M. Night Shyamalan's terrifying thriller will chill you. [child’s grandmother dies]

Teen

A Walk to Remember(2002) PG When bad boy Landon (Shane West) is cast opposite the campus bookworm (Mandy Moore) in a school play, no one expects romance to bloom. Despite peer pressure and strict parents, the newly minted lovebirds forge a heartfelt bond ... until tragedy tears them apart. An adaptation of Nicholas Sparks's best-seller. [teen death]

Revised 4/5/2020