The Bard Observer Is Free."

OBSERVER Vol. 8 No. 6 December 15, 1997

Page 1 Registration Card Pulling Caused Delays, Aggravation Frustration prompted questions about how to best collect fees Nate Schwartz Arts Exchange New grant will help support Bard-Red Hook arts partnership Stephanie Schneider Parking Problems Bewailed Packed lots, potholes, and towings irk drivers Abigail Rosenberg Page 3 Student Life Committee Report Janice Sandwick Theatre for a New Audience A blab session with director/professor/playwright Jeff Sichel Meredith Yayanos Witness Variety City Bard band has EP on sale at Crazy Bird Records Meredith Yayanos Page 5 In Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, Eastwood Fails to Attain Consistent Tone Effort to circumscribe the true-crime novel’s story line causes confusion in the film version Arnie’s Fatality Fest Recorded [Arnold Schwarzenegger] The Zine Scene Dress Code Angst, Biker Solidarity, Lice and More Elissa Nelson and Lauren Martin Page 7 Album Review Don’t Believe the Hype? Joel Hunt Page 8 Erotic Obsessions Stevie Nicks 4-leatha, 4-lace, and 4-eva Leah Zanoni Cartoon Page 9 Rough Waters, Smooth Sailin’ A night with jazz legend Jimmy Cobb Basil Bouris Eschew Individuality, Block it Off With the Trilogy The philosophy of television viewing in deKline Stephanie Schneider Page 10 “Too Clever by Half” Lewonczyk directing Ostrovsky makes sense, but many are curious: what’s with the schlong? Lauren Ciborski Cartoons Page 11 The Truth and Reconciliation Commission: A betrayal of the martyrs who fought for South Africa’s liberation from a racist government! Michael Canham Please Don’t Kill Yourself Andy Varyu Page 12 The Case Files Life in the Projects David Case DOSO Über Alles Diary of a Madman: The Case Filer details Bard political intrigue Page 14 Classifieds Observer Editorial Policy Page 15 Y Chromosomes are in Doubt Some male sports tend to leave out the man Jeremy Dillahunt Bard Bloodies Brooklyn Men take it hard everywhere but the hoop Jeremy Dillahunt Schedule New Record What came after was even more successful [Bard women’s basketball] Squish Squash Have ye a look at this Eva Bodula and Leila Bandar Page 16 Bot-man Seven Years in Annandale-on-Hudson (continued) Chris Van Dykeand John Holowach "News is whatever sells newspapers; The Bard Observer is free." . - . The Bard Observer ANNANDALE~ON~HUDSON, NY, 12504 DECEMBERI5, 1997 ISSUE 6, VOLUME 8 Registration Card. Pulling Caused . . Delays, Aggravation Frustration prompted questions about hOUJ to best collect fee~

By NATE SCtiWARTZ, Design Editor

Enteriri.g a dense throng in front of the Student Accounts Office (SAO) on registration -day; December 3, one encountered dozens of students whose attempts to clear their accounts before the beginning of registration proper were frustrated by confused, slow-moving lines. One-hundred-and ninety registrntion cards were withheld, pending the payment of outsta'nding charges ranging from tuition to library fines; consequently, the SAO was deluged with students seeking information and financial clearance. Many of these students then LET THERE BE LIGHT: During the Festival of Lights, on the evening of December 13. Rabbi Joanna Katz holds went to the professors without their cards and suc ceeded in gettin_g on class rosters without officially registering. Parking Formfng an undefined queue which overflowed into the main entrance of tht: Buildings and .'.,:- ,:-...-x --r- - .: -- -. :...:.::·-..!•n. he' l ------Grounds building, Sophomore II's, Juniors and · '""l.~ew grant wm p support Seniors vied -for position to see ·Bursar Viki Problems Papadimitriou, hoping to get the cards and still par :':;;;~~r4.7-~~il HOOk. a.;rts pa:rtner~hip. : ·. ....,.:.:.··v:.:;-_;;.;";~-.;·.. ;.,;:· "J'' • ;.-;:· ticipate in registration between 11 and 12:30 p.m. ,,,,·,~J4i§Ig~HJY:~tm.. §~@~P~R .. ~ .& .~~~Y¥P~m~~•f?r while students of lower sr;Hus worked towards to the·· Bewailed ubtaining their cards in time for 'their afternoon ·:· :~-~-~~-~tift)pa;triership ProJeef~arde£iaw4;ooo ~ant MNr~at&'Colles~-an.a·Rea HOOk ScliOO!biStricts I}artnersb!PiJrosrarn'tn registration at 1:30-3 p.m. -There were three lines · artietluditiO~WfliChhaS been In cilstence for twelve years and now Packed lots, potholes, which were nearly indistinguishable and it was only :rwill be able t(} invOlve agreater community, including: .&td St:uderits. and tawings irk drivers through students· p<1ssing information along that t:·:>~·~,;,,,.the program,. entitled B.R.l.O .G .E$: {Bard .Co liege .and those at what appeared to be the rear learned .....· ~e,d H9ok C~otrai Sch9ot_l.AtrQdvth)g and Deyeloping Goals By ABIGAIL ROSENBERG, whet}:1er they ought to cut ahead. · ,fqr :E;nti8!!teniJ1g ~nd ~nrich~pg Students through Aft~). is Opinions Editor After several minutes an inquisitive student ..... ·.. :CI~stgn~d ~q tnt~g~ate the -visual arts and the core curricula. ln the found her way to either the two-pronged informa ···· Red}look Scb.oois. -· · · · · · Been having trouble parking latdy? tion line where one could obtain data and submit .·. ':Til~ -~·.r{I.o.qj~:~s:·pr(}gram Is o~e oftwenty-thri!e partner~ You're not alone. The Olin and Kline payment, or to the line which led to Papadimitriou's -· ···$~ip$}ri the state to ~~ei~e such.a ~ant~hich'C•recognlie~ the lots have been filled to capacity on office across the hall from Student'Accounts. In the sllii*gih of the partnership's -program lriarts educatirif} arid its some days, forcing students to park in latter line one had to wait and report payment to ~'"'''Praml.Se'.• asa'mod:ef''farU1e sciit!wide'.edticinloi:iiililiitiailve- aevel other lots such as the one at the Fisher State of the.Arts and the State the Bursar or otherwise convince her that it was -,of)eH-h.Y" the-New-York Council Arts Center. On most days, cars arc . . :¥ducatlonDep3rhrie!1t," reported a rec~nrpress release. _. . parked two rows deep in both the dri soon to be made in order to acquire the card. It was :.:A•:.:\i.IA~rding to'afiartlcl(! published in the Fall! Winter issue of veways of the Olin lot, and some stu~ necessary to visit Papadimitriou even if one had ·• ·Adsten~. a p~bli~ation oftne D~td~es$ County Arts Council. Ann dents have taken to parking in paid one of the two staffpeople tending the infor .-;t:;:9~~~~; -~~e~, ~~~~~t~~~atit)~}!~is?~· sl!fd ~~f--W~-~~ (}f the handicapped spaces and other illegal ma.tion lines. ,_,,, Prp~~(JliS to in~&r.a.~ .. -~ .?11!> with ~ study of S()~ial .St1Jdies, spots such as the Kline loading dock. Papadimitriou attributed the back-ups to a num ::.::.. :tt!~!i?.~:}ff]!i~S!.f~~~~s; .t'J!a~~. ~I!~ ... ~£~~~-~5!. ~o. off~r:.~~den!~, , According to Director of Security ber of f<~ctors. One was the inexperience of her l'piJl~ip1e learn and shm!v they know~" . ways to what Robert Brock, this pr~rking shortage staff-both were spring registration' rookies. ·.·:············· ·.- promote -basic is not attributed to there being more Tt;l~ p~sra#tfori~l.vsthooretical th~-beii~fProfesSional th~i th~ artists "arts can the HudsOn Another was the fact that studenrs were already .. symil01jc arid skllls: from cars on campus. He explains that . -'\!alief region and, students and r.icuJty rrom Bard- College will wofk queued when she arrived in the morning and the because the parking on Ravine Road wtifi the daSsroc>m teachers inimplemllnting the new program." .. lines grew quickly so that at first she had no oppor has been suspended due to the con tunity to develop a strategy with her staff and soon , ·•····

Registratiol'}- frustration exacerbated by delays ... Arts exchange partnership ... STORY CONTINUED FROM PAGE ONE clear the way for students who cannot pro~ : _duce the monies immediately. STORY CONTINUED FROM PAGE ONE reminders to both parents and students. performers and musicians to share their talents with the Red Despite the difficulties on registre~tion "I would like to ask how I can ~t it Hook schools. The grant will also allow the school children to go d<'ly, at press time 67 registration cards were across," she said. "I'm going to send copies of on more field trips to different concerts, theater productions and possession of the Bursar. Among the bil_ls to every student." This was an idea still in the museums, including Bard's own Center for Curatorial Studies. this number some are cards of students tak she is considering ClS a respLmse to the large Though Bard students are not currently involved in the pro number of students ;vho didn't get their ing a leave of absence or going abroad. gram, the goal for next semester is to get them to participate. In acc;ounts dear before registration day. Nevertheless, many students have yet to set late January, there will be a meeting for Bard students interested -She regretted the slow movement of the de their accounts. Some are waiting as long in working in the Red Hook classrooms with the artists-in-resi line to see her on registration day but said as possible · to pay and some are even refus dence. Students who are interested can contact Ann Gabler (ext. 7434) or Maureen Forrcstal (ext. 7539) for more information. th ·'enla'tged and paved is the Fisher lot. This lot is considered Bard, she said, "l've been here a lot of years. "I would like to create an environment , _ :,. ,to' ·h~ the .main lot for the new student center since there Bard is a good place." Which is to say, she where the students affected can assist in the - ar~, ~,t:,l ~ J>I~ns for adjacent parking for the building. While refuses_ to- resort to such tactics as fines for process," said Jetto. "My highest priority is ·. BmdvJg is aware of the bad condition~ of lots such as Kline late checks (such as are used oy many col~ to make registration equitable, meaningful, · ::u\d Olin, infamoUs for their mud and New York City-sized lection otficcs) or to resort to more auto~ and as painless as possiblc ... When things P4th~_les}he says that there are no plans to pave them. TI1e mated methods. don't go well we a!! suffer." · 'v:conc(;ritr;:tdon will be on grating and laying. down new Papadimitriou pwposcd that students "My advice to students-in addition to .· : grav~i, which is taken care of by B&G. Brudvig says that might be involved in calling their peers to the institution taking more precautions \~;*l,h~r~ ar~ plans in the works for redirecting traffic through remind them of unpaid fees. is to be more proactive. It's important to be '_ _'·> ·otitthe ~ntire c3:mpus apd parking lots such a& the one at 5ome students whose cards were pulled responsible for yourself, to learn what the •. :cruger Village~ Landscape architects have already designed

did not know thnt they owed funds until the balances are-it's a difficult time to do · poS.Si~le ch<~nges for the Cruger lot 1 but the contruction morning of registratiLHI.. that. Both sides need to be informing each """ d~p.el'l:ds_op:, of course, funding. The campus-wide parking "I didn't get into one class because of it," other better." ' ..J6cus will be on organizing"the space already available so She said that the billing dates c.ould be . that less. is wasted. said junior Anron Brobw. "I registered any~ ; ·· ·~ · .. ~ ·, ...... way [without the card]. I told my teachers I moved back, or registration moved forward, would have tny card later... [at the SAO] it in order to allow a larger window of time for : ·.:~ When asked if there are plans was a lo~g time to wait in line ... it was one of collecting funds. She also proposed giving the longest lines I've ever seen there." Student Accounts _a ~pace in Olin during .,, :< .Jo.:improve the_ parking On registration day Brokaw learned spring registration so that it is more cen; ~ '¥. ' . that the reminder notices sent to one of trally located. This would also reduce the -c-qnditi9ns, .Brudvig _said that his divorced parents didn't reach the other problem of congestion which exacerbated parent who is responsible for the payment. the frustrations of those waiting in the :·i'he Ha,nly -lot scheduled to be The bill wasn't paid on time, but Brokaw cramped hallway outside the SAO. !--'.,_,.___ __ ,.,-. •._ __,, . • .. ,- en.larged and paved settled it himself within hours of learning Papadimitriou said that she "prefers to of its t

dent works for Sichel's course ranged from the Rhinecliff hotel to a moving traincar to Tivoli's Town Theatre for a New Audience ,Hall to the forests of German town. Sichel has been, to say the least, pleased with the enthusiasm of his ·A blab session with director/profe_ssor/play~right Jeff Sichel students. "[ taught

Final Exhibitions of Image and Form

SENIOR SHOWS: Three seniors presented their work in the Fisher Art Center last week. Clockwise from top left: plaster sculpture by Laura-Gail Bibb, Untitled by Augusta Anderson {one of liar many photographs). and sculptures by Ray Oglesby in the Fisher Atrium. Witness Variety City Bard band has EP on sale at Crazy Bird Records (Shoes,Boots,Ciogs] By MEREDITH YAYANOS, Co-Editor-in-Chief Dr.Martens Welcome to an abbreviated tour of Variety City, {Jopulation five. We ask only that you keep your hands and !egs f,ir\{enstoG" inside of the bus at all times, as we don't want to cause trouble with the l.\ar\(s natives. Here's one now! That grubby banshee in the fishnet bodysuit with her· legs wrapj1ed around the mic £GGO stand, is voca!ist Laurel Barday. A little further down the road, the exceedingly tall fellow with a poker Dans~o face and iron~ strong guitar riffs, that's Matthew Katz~Bohen. Barclay Saul's the curly one with the joyously p\uf> 5o other brandf> cracked~out keyboard parts. Bassist proves that Variety City is more ErinWa.tson just moved to town than simply a live spectacle: these recently, and we're certainly glad to see her baby blues. And of course, guys have really got something going on. Barclay's vocals are clear Simply the there's Tess Durand, the little drum~ mer girl with a big mean 3/4. That's and intelligible in the mix, so one Best Selection Around everybody. Stay and listen for a spell: can aqually appreciate her gleefully you'll be glad you visited ... demented lyrics. Katz-Bohen's gui Arguably the most startling Bard tar and Saul's keyboard parts are in band around this semester, Variety perfect sync, Durand's playing is City is an amalgamation of straight, concise and steady, and so on and so forward. 90's rock sensibility and forth ... oh dear, I reahze this article PEGASUS impetuous bizarrg_ mentality. Sadly, sounds more like an ad campaEgn they'll be on hiatus for a while than a music review, but really, 1 Comlorl Foohvear because front-girl Barclay i& ventur have little to say about Variety City ing off to Israel for the remainder of that isn't biased by my ensuing ado open everyday the year. However, a self-titled EP ration and a current 102-degree replete with five splendid tracks is fever. I'll be ecstatic to finish up currently available on Crazy Bird and go home, but Et's a bittersweet 679-2373 Records to tide diehard fans over departure, for I know I shall never 'til she returns frorn the Holy Land. see Variety City play again. I'm Woodstock Among other things, the CD g_oing to miss them. THE BARD OBSER_VER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT MONDAY. DECEMBER 15, 1997 5 In Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil, Eastwood Fails to Attain Consistent Tone Effort to circumscribe the true .. crime novel's story line causes' confusion in film version

By SCOTT COMMERSON, Assistant Copy Editor MTV's "Oddville" jealous. But the party is just a Unfortunately, such scene~ J:armot compensate - warin~Lip for the real spectacle. In the wee hours of for a dull plot. It seems that Eastwood is unable to Testifying in a widely-publicized murder trial, the morning, Williams kills his young gigolo boyfriend. decide which genre he is f! tip. "No was in self-defense, he is indicted on murder or a trial dramal Perhaps Eastwood was trying fur a offense, Miss," purrs the drag queen to the horrified charges anyway. Once he is "outed" by the newspa combimHiun of all three, but he never achieves a grandmother, "but blue is definitely not your color." pers, Williams is deserted by the rich socialites and consistent tone. The result is that, aside from a few This is one of the more-memorable scenes from sycophants who clamored for invitations to his disjointed scenes, Clint Eastwood's newest directing effort, Midnight the movie fnils to fully engage party only the night before. Mired in the hypocrisy the audience on any level. The plot's driving in the Garden of Good and Evil. While the film has force of small-town Southern society, journalist Kelso is the mystery oddities ~nd one-liners aplenty, its basLc storyline surrounding the murder, yet we are realizes he is onto something much fails to engage. Based on John Berendt's bigger thai). never made to care whether Williams killed his .some rinky-dink Town immensely popular true-crime novel set in and Country story. lover in self defense or in cold bk)od. As a charac While investigating the slain hustler's Georgia, the film follows a young magazin~ writ~_! back ter, Williams remains too mysterious and detached as he forages through the sunny, scandalous jun ground, journalist Kelso encounters some truly to capture our interest. gle of Savannah high society. On assignment unique personalities, including an obnoxious drag At over two-and-a-half hours, the film would fromTown and Country magazine, New York queen, a voodoo priestess, and a gun-toting have benefited from more c~diting. EastwuoJ's hesi freelance writer John Kelso (John Cusack) comes widow. This zany cast of characters really forms tancy to p

Film Human fatalities Notable$ Une$, Stat$ and Facts .Afnie's Fatality Conan the Barbarian 27 Waxes a vulture, a 20-foot snake, a horse Canan the Destroyer 39 Po!lshes off)l horse, a eame~ amonster, a demigod, and Wilt Chamberlain FeSt Re~~~d~d' Red Sonja 27 Makes pasta of a gigantic metal alligator . Red Heat 11 Two dogs olfed . . - ·.TWiJ .riiil~nas fJa:cJ:, : studmii IJc"von L~dJIJw :and Nic1c .· .·.. True Lies 75 Utters "You're Fired" before launching a missle at a chap. ;: ~;~?f£Ii§ffffi::J;n;~~;_!~f:if:i~~kes;~v;~ 'TWins DIJmps 4,000 poun<1$ of chain on a mt;m and says, "H~ had a lot on his mind." Commando 130 After impaling a victim on a steain pipe: "Let off some steam" - : Pqwer EarS Blld Por-~JNDrinlc as wen as itiii/JilbeJJs.iiJd a .. Termfnator 61 "I' be curMJar for; spol1~i1JJ(:(!USpu~nping UJ!: .4t it% /id¥,h? ZJ it~ ~ ~ ,. . ll back." dents vverepn!fent, at its low BodKin W4f:dled.easttriY whi(e. T2 0 "I'll be back." L~dfo;v [email protected]~cf ![i, Cl/1· . 't~m(cftHt li:lff!li ~ :h :ii.& :/#ii:.. : : : : · ·. Runfilng Man H) Blows guy up: 'What a hothead." Luclfow managed to .ta.!Juiate the .deat/J tolls /pi;Ji/1 ypu .· Total Recall 58 Rubs out robot litiii:ky dewtees and neophyteS alike:. &lzold t/J~ glo:y! · · · taxi driver. ... _., :- .. - .. , . ·· · -.· ·-:: ,; :":::::·::::;:· _. ;·--. Pred8tqr .. · 3S .· .• ..!~ 'a$ au_hu~~~~ri fii-$i 26 mi~~te~. Many p!MIS and bugs annihilated . Destroys Lou Ferigo and a few braincells.

The Zine Scene Dress Code Angst, Biker Solidarity, Lice & More by Elissa Nelson & Lauren Martin, Columnists

More zine reviews! More great reasons to visit the Bard Zine Library, who are good in bed! Lori, who does Hot' Snot Pot (see review), sent me located in the Root Cellar (Bard's own student-run natural food store) in three issues of this great comic compilation. We have very few comics in the basement of the Old Gym. the zine library, partly just because Lauren and l don't know much about the Matriculate (a.k.a. Sidetracked #9A). Remember how much you hated high genre--if anyone does, and wants to suggest stuff we should get, ple;u;c con school? Remember all the bullshit you had to go through, like cliques, and tact me. Anyway, this is a fabulous queer-positive, sex-positive comic, with dress codes, unreasonable rules and out-of-touch teachers? Well Menghsin a two- page paperdoll spread of The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, San tuok over a year to collect sturies from all sorts of different people all over Francisco's notorious and oft-photographed drag sisterhood; a strange little North America. There are comics, photographs, lists, newspaper clippings, piece about a man who finds Jesus, shrunk down to a tiny size, under his and tons of rants against the institution known as high school. Besides many kitchen table (Jesus tries to pass himself off as a leprechaun, but our mura angst-ridden tales of dress code violations, Matriculate also contains stories tor isn't fooled for a minute, despite tht: Irish accent); Tom Tomorrow's of sexual harassment, underground newspapers, one school's fucked-up reac Sparky with a condom on his beak; and lots of other entertaining and infor mative tion to rape, and other scary stuff. Though we can all be thankful that high stuff. . E.N. school is now but a distant memory, this is a good reminder that for m;-my, Hot Snot Pot #7. Lori and her sister are two weird and funny ladies. They each school is still a living hell. L.M. have a unique writing style. In my favorite story, about when thdr whole fam Fierce Femme #2. The subject of this zine? Women, bicycle:> and culture. No ily got lice, Lori describes the humiliations that accompany the lice check joke. l love it! Though I am no big-time biker myself, I get a kick reading and the embitrrassmcnt suffered by any child unfortunate enough to have a about tough girls biking eround the world. This zit1e reminds me of these 'little bugger in her hair. She tells how the school nurse made ten-year-old wheat-pasted signs I saw plastered all around Seattle this summer: "CARS Lamey (her sister--don't ask me) sit by herself in the hallway outside the KILL; KILL CARS." Learn about biker solidarity, "Waving Wednesdays" (a nurse's office, and everyone W<

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Happy hour everv day from 4:31 to 6 and 10 to 11 _ Santa Fe Tivoli 114 757 4111 -The Bard Papers is now accepting photographs, 'i' - __ artwork, poetry, fiction, and film stills. Deadli11e February lf 1998 Send submissions to box #799. All work must be anonymous and include box #. THE BARD OBSERVER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT MONDAY. DECEMBER 15. 1997 7

him off. However, he pulled ofT a succcssfu( tour Don't Believe L1st summer, and h;~:; ~~ _L!rcat.m.:w alhum t:ntitlcd ]O)'a (on Dmg City). Bmdc~11ly, this Cllbum seems to represent Oldham's proverbial grab-for-th~: ring. Some people I know have compbncd the Hype? about tb~..: "slick" sound, but l actue~lly enjoy it and find it aprwpriate.-But, at least it's nice tu By JOEL HUNT, Contributor know thiil this band (v,.·hich includes D-.1vid Pajo) c<~n orcr That dre.aded of words, hype, can be an interest sound quality nf t;~lrlicr lp's pr1>h<1hly had more tu ing thing. Hype, of course, permeates everything Jo with lack uf funding than an nctual choice. in late-tw~.:ntieth century culture; th;:tt is, its \XIhat~..:ver, ]oya represents OlJhs in Bard's Zinc Libmry in the Root Ccllr1r, well as some other Chicago luminaries. David Pajo is the one member of Tortoise but you'll hwatch, among inch single by Dehuosa and U-sheen on Fluid smolders, which is nice for a change. other:;, so keep those eyes peeled, kids! (No, I Ounce Records. But contained within these Another recipient of the indie-hype sweep don't mean literally!) grooves you'll find drum n' bass-oriented .stuff, stakes would be none other than Will Oldham. So for next time, I'll try to keep it brief as I get nicely executed and relatively anonymous (to You may know him better by many of his bands' away from the rock thing and explore releases the point that I don't know which Tortoise n<1mes: Palace Brothers, Palace, Palace Songs, from the wonderful genres of Minimalism and members arc actually involved). Which, for such Palace Music, etc. (you get the idea). After the Microtonality. It'll be lots of fun, .mJ I rrombe a deliberately star-less genre, is commendable. excellent first album There Is No-One What Will that yuu won't fall asleep while reading it. Well, On the ep end, there's a new one by The Sea and Take Care of You, Mr. Oldham was the receiver of mnybe that's one pr~1mise I just won't be Cake. This Chicago pop group features Tortoise much hype, but mostly well-earned. However, keep. But since this is the last issue of the drummer Jl)hn McEntire as well as occasionally after a slew of bad tours and worse albums (Viva Obser•ver for the semester, you'll just have to ol' man Doug McCombs on synthesizer duties. Last Blues, Arise Therefore), I was ready to write wait. Damn! Well, we'll see you next year.

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So, l must write of her, for she is the only per Stevie and her friends were oh so delving sharply Stevie Nicks · former left with an ounce of artistic il.1.tegrity. into personal themes effectively and beautifully. And the same can be said for her band members. More to the point, the Beatlcs didn't have They don't stand on stage and look bored for our Stevie. The Be;ltles were a pop group too, except 4, leatha, 4, lace, benefit. They provide an emotional, heartfelt they "substance" whatever that means in a capi performance for the viewer, a rare treat in an age t

0 ThE DANciNG PAp.ERclip of ToRMENTEd Souls I by MAqNvs

I 1.,-.v~...,·+ ~oJ o. C.

C Morgan Magnus Pielli 1997 THE BARD OBSERVER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT MONDAY, DECE!v!BER 15, 1997 9

Rough Waters, Eschew.lfldi viduality, Smooth Sailin' Block it qff with the Trilogy A night with jazz legend Jimmy Cobb , The phl.losophy.,of television viewing in deKline Arts & Entertallunent Editor By BASIL BOURIS, News Editor s;:,STSPHANIE SCHNEIDER, me to watch a lot of t.v. Over . Never let anyone tell you that Olin Auditorium is <1 good place to hear Working in deKUnelnthe evenings ha,s forced live jazz. Its sterile walls and lecture. hall-style seating arc immediate time, I have noticed distinct patterns in the t.v.-watching habits of Bard stu obstacles to any musician whose art thrives on the intimate and subtle , dents. f can deduce' what shows are most popular by the size of the crowd interactions bt:tween performers and audience members. Such was ~he . ., present at that time:Each year offers a new spectrum. Last ~emester, there scene this past Friday evening as legendary jazz drummer Jimmy Cobb ... '\:V(lS a Dukes of Hazziird contingency, whiCh now seems to have given way to (you might know him from such albums as John Coltrane's Giant Steps ·. t!Ighlandercrowd. And of course there are the obvious favorites: the always or Miles O,wis's Kind of Blue) took the stage alongside an all-star cast t;:las§lcally comic Simpsons, the intriguing X~FJles, and perhaps this year's including trombonist Roswell RuJJ and saxophonist extraordinaire biggest phenomenon:. South Park. Harvey Kaiser. Being forced to study these . patterns. I have also noticed a difference Despite the organizational efforts of Melanie Shaw and the Bard jazz between the way that I and many at Bard view t.v. For me, it is not the indi" Heritage Club, the sole sponwr of the ~oncert, the impersonal setting vidual show that is most important, although I do have favorites ;;~s well. proved the least of the obstacles the musicians had tl) overcome. "Ina," Rather, I like to plan my t.v. watching around the most .:::onvinient time in named Herbie Nickles, was the a song by an obscure 1950's comroser order to get maximum t.v. enjoyment. In other words, what i arn calling for is and was marked by the obvious inaudibility of first tunc of the evening a new way of viewing t.v. Instead of going for the individual show, one should Booker. However, what appeared to be a faulty amplifier bassist Walter aim to find one's o-wn personal block of t.v. time, made up of a conglomerate gave I:toswell Rudd a chance to truly show off his skills of improvisation of personally appeaHng shows. I thought that I had found that ideal block as he wrapped thl! only vocal microphone in a T-shirt and stuffed it until it was cruelly altered. I am trying to adjust to the new block, but it is the between Booker's bass strings. old one for which I still long. It was perfect. It was t.v. heaven. Two songs later the microphnne had to be unwrapped so Bard's own The block that lam talking about is what a friend of tnine has coined "The pianist Joel Bishop O'brien could sing "Shangri-la", a tune that allowed out wlth followed by Cheers, Murphy Brown. and the rhythm section to exhibit their stylistic diversity as they ripped i~to Trilogy." It started Seinfeld. so that's four shows. Sorry.) Now, a steamy Latin groove midway through the ballad. The evening the gra:fld finale: The Honeymooners. (O.k., reached its comical peak a few minutes later, however, during "Grand . .~he who~e purpose of the Trilogy was predicated on the fact that you would Central" (a song Cobb recorded originally in the mid-1960's with John watch each show with the knowledge of what came before It and what would Coltrane, Cannonball Adderley, and Paul Chambers). Booker, with . come-a.ttei it:·rii other .. words-;);ou waichea Cheers with the knowledge that it microphone now safely restored to its nook between his strings, roared was sandwiched betweenSeinfeldand Murphy Brown. You didn't watch each into a mesmerizing solo but was unfortunately now much too loud. show as an individual entity, but rather as part of the whole. The conception Harvey Kaiser quickly sent a series of hand signals up to the control of shows a~ a .block of t.v. colors how you view each show. booth, which apparently houses the mi"crophone's volume knob. Upon Th_e beal,ltyof..a block of t.v. is that you know where it is going and you the misinterpretation l)f Kaiser's downward gesticulations, the five know when it w~ll end. Your t;.v. watching is never anti-cllma.:::tk, You know musicians momentarily disappeared as the stage lights faded into dark exactly when to walk away. If you watch shows individually, you are using t.v. ness. But despite it all-faulty amp and schizophrenic microphone &s ..a momentary.dlstraction; with a block you have a conception of the alike-Booker came smokin' out of the darkness and set the stage for a future. You w.atch because there is something to look forward to and some~ near-flawless (by comparison) second set. thing that you've completed. were, it was very much As humorous as all of the evening's problems .It is very important that you flnd your own personal block, but I will tell same disorg;mization and miscommunication that all()wed the 150 this yoH why the Trilogy was such a great one. or so in attendance to bare witness to one of the things that makes live ·.. Seinfeldis a show that can very well stand on Its own two feet. It's funny, jazz. so great. That is the solving of musical problems, whether they although many times it has a painfully frustrating storyline it definitely exist structurally within the music itself or involve outside forces hooks you in. It's entertaining. It's got solid characters. And since the beyond the musici::lns' control. This is the creative process unfolding Trilogy was made up of syndicated shows. many SdnfP!d episodes were live before your very eyes. A great musician once remarked that "play ones from the glory days of the series. But I can't really get involved ing music in a studio is like building a ship in ::~ bottle, and playing prime is so great, becaus~ each show really isn't so music live is like navigating a ship on the open sea." The beauty of this In describing why each show process and of this music is in the details, the stuff th

"Too Clever By Half' Lewonczyk directing Ostrovsky makes sense But many are curious: what's with the schlong? By LAUREN CIBORSKI, Contributor sound like a spot on his resume, Ty is an. exc"eptiorially talented and funny I, the aforesigned, a somewhat horn theater artist whose ability to remain swaggled reporter, would like you to onstage almost throughout the show read this review with the understand should be lauded. Second, Caitlin ing that I do not consider myself a McDonough-Thayer (Kleopatra) and Clever critic. But hcr<.:'s what I think Danny "!?owes (Mamaev), newcomers anyway. to the Bard theatre scene, who hdd The Bard Drama Dep:utment's lat their own in a cast of primarily more est pmduction, Too Clever by Half or experienced actors and whose future Diary of a Scoundrel, by Alexander appearances are eagerly anticipated. Ostrovsky, is set in Moscow during the Applause is also due to the three foot last quarter of the nineteenth century. men (E. Corinth Briggs, Yoyssef The main character, Yegor Gloumov Kerkour, and Graham Bliss) who pro (Ty Howell), as part of a scheme to vided much-needed comic relief. replenish his family's lost fortune, Extra, applause is owed to the set manipubtes a circle of aristocrats by crew, and the costume, make-up, and playing on their sympnthies. The story hair design. It is rare to see so much serves to expose the various insecurities" attention paid to such details in a Bard and whimsicalitit:s of tht..: Russian elite production, :md all of tht: students on at the time the play was written. The the technical end deserve long overdue script lends itself well to comp::trison ' respect for a job well done. Of course i with other plays of its time; nothing cannot compliment the production particularly shucking or absurd, it has a staff without mentioning the designers, somewhat academic sense of humor, Darryl Stone (costumes) and Alexis 6vr \1111'1-f "-" n> e• h~our.·~ rcfl lllt NUT and it is more longwindcd than most Kelly {hair) in palticulnr. 1:1-SUE' D•<>•, M.t :c JVST ~oON'T 1J41Nk ~ (/'H llAAW II VIolENT 1:010 rtv Tl\e freshman seminar papers. But, a few words of admonition are ·~~11>M In fact, with <1ll due respect to the in order as this is a critical review. ~ stamina of the cast and crew, the show Though nudity in a theatre production ••• ~ (»'!'UP! 7 ~ was pretty damn long. It's asking a lot can make a very powerful statement, it $tM liP' of an audience to spend three and a is often abused by Bard's Drama half hours watching a production at Department. In this production specif this time of year, and perhaps this play ically, the opening scene showing a could have been produced earlier on in twenty-something Russian aristocrat the semester. It's a sht=lme th<'lt the waltzing around buck-naked in front of Drama Department consistently saves -his mother buck naked seemed excep- the lengthiest show of the se;1son for - tionally awkward and perhaps a little finals week, when student morale is low unnecessary. Really, what is the point? and the· audience leaves half of its All the ;.mdicncc can do is wonder, attention in the library. "Why the schlong?" Also, regarding ,,, The acting was generally pretty the ending, I don't get it. solid, but as usual there were a few our Finally, congratulations to Jeff CREft\Eb,we.ITn'N t>Rfl:1..o..N+slit>l(.etnw: Loo.se -t131NKY ~ C'*"ru."'"''"'~'.....o! standing cast members who I would Lewonczyk on his mainstage directorial 1 like to recognize. First, Ty Howell, debut. All in all the production was WE Lilt£ 10 61Ue ASI\tiUT OuTTD: O~R.I-IOHs-F'oll. m£ UAli(CUTS, AtJI,!l-'1' l:>t>lll!i(DI'wiD Cj\se)w ''l)AI1N 11te- HAN f~, E\oii'IH H.6w;.oP.-l'ot. We ITi' IN cohesive and refined. It is obvious he whose almost hypnotic stage presence \ltE t>Jt'IHe oF /, Oflll.l'tt\• rei! Ul,ft\ IN OU/1. DI\REJ1 lioiT 5\JINf'Af..L, Hf\lt'l' M(IG.M~o:t.~e·l'o!l: 1-fm~ ~!i \l~tl-l£11. l'~tiL .SI-\J\11-I'CNCA. !Ill i!l- L•vf 'flfl), :>NJF'F SNlf"F. v

Hi! rA.\ Sk.•trt·-'"'t..,. .So, Hu-IP.t.r.&, \.10\.ud •, fe, ~.U\t..t~ "ot ~~ 1 ClA4. tAi~u? -\'k,<., CA'""f 01\(.. 0' ~'{ k~A· 1 ~ l ~ I tw\.8. \ "{ • THE BARD OBSERVER OPINIONS MONDAY, DECEMBER 15, 1997 11 The Truth and Reconciliation Commission: A betrayal of the martyrs who fought for South Africa's liberation from a racist government!

By MICHAEL CANHAM, Contributor only ensured the deaths of thousands of innocent women forces -a locatilm of covert opemtions, responsible for and children, but also targeted statesmen. the maiming of innocent civilians in downtown Soweto. Immediately after signing the Truth and Reconciliation The first statesman to fall victim to this was President Mr F.W. De Klerk immediately issued a press statement, Bill into law, President Nelson Mandela n:markeJ, "now Samora Machd, the head of the first' worker and peasant denying any knowledge of De Kok. This is despite sworn that 'south African's have reached ~his historical epoch, socialist government in Mozambique who died in a mys court statements by De Kok and many others that De it is only by knowing the truth th:.H South Africans will terious plane crash in 1985. The South African govern enjoy true freedom and heal the wounds of the past." Klerk was at the head of state security and knew each men-t denied any direct involvement in his death, On December 31,1961, the African National and every activity of covert operations. despite subsequent court evidence to the contrary. And Congress (ANC), then a liberation mo~ement and the The case of De Kok cost taxpayers almt)St 3 million although some of the atrocities of the Apartheid state only true representative of the aspirations of the rand, ($1 ,034,482), and De Kok was found guilty anyway were given ample attention in the progressive black oppressed majority declared, "There comes a time in the and sentenced to 120 years imprisnnmcnt. Why did the media, the privileged white minority raised not a single life of any nation where there remains two choices: sub government spend all this money, even though each specter of objection to the tyrrany of South Africa. In mit of fight. That time has now come for South Africa. black person i~ South Africa knows that De Klerk was fact, more and more white South Africans were equipped We will not submit, but fight until we bring the indeed involved? The De Kok case proves that the TRC with firearms to "exterminate these Native terrorists." Apartheid regime to its knees." This declaration, taken is yet another extravagant waste of money that could To bring all these details to light, and as part of the after almost 50 years of passive resistance against an have been directed to essential social services, for which negotiated settlement in South Africa, the Nationalist unyielding racist regime backed by British imperialism, Black South Africans have no access. Party that had fomerly ruled finally agreed to assist and was to change the course of politics in South Africa. At the same time, P.W. Botha, former st

.. -...... -· .·..,..·: 'tifeinthe ·prOjects .-_.. . .. ·. .· ·: ...... · . . . . :... . ' . by .Davif!.: (Jase, Columnist · to do at some point between L&T and On August 6, 1994, I first came ·to Bantb~ Oeceirih~r ist, J99.7 1• I s~b; - ~ _g_ty~mea!J~~ b.~~ ~;illy people'seem It giggle mltted my project to the Dean ~~dhad - 'myproject board.lthtnk it's a good · j their serilorp!oJ~ct: Unforttmately.r am so immature that I start to project, and my board agrees. It has lots of citations, insights, footnotes, and when ·people say ''Identity." -- PC · it i.s all in black and white. In H Iiesthe . f~!,lition of!T'Y~lJ,rd experie11ces but ~ I wish that l had been a PC. According to page 19 of the .somehow I feel that something .iS m}s._$irig. Nevertheless, at the en~f of my . Handbook:· "As Pes· you are upperdass students, in. good academic and of Bard <;areer, 1 sincerely believe thati have 'had the · 6nestJiber~l arts ~duca- .. social standi~g, _~~~P.?ill,ible for promoting the safety and well-being am In favor of a class~ tlon that money can buy, and tlHlt no a,hount of money could buy the gos- students living _in residence hails... " (sic)' Although I sip whit::h rev-eals the details of student. _fa~ulty and ~dintp1~trat~on politics. . ~.: . less society, I think it w_ould be niCe to be an '' upperclass student," because IrJ had to repeat either my ptoJec~ or nry entire Bard education, there are . theri I think I would be able to oppress the proletariat. Likewise, I always as to ·· · a few things I would do slightly differently. · ·· . ._ wanted to be of "higll'soclal standing." The PC Handbook is unclear For one, there would be more fUll ff~lital nudity in my p~oject. I collld not i whether or noftQ_e Peaii.of Residence Life determines if a potential PC access· seem to work any into an economics· a~ p~iitical science project (not for hick is in high social standing, or if as PCS:, a· select few are given certain . of trying). If anyone has any ideas.ab "out this;· I would apprci:;iate a quick -~ to certain secrets td popularity. I wonder If these secrets to popularity and note, Likewise, although I have said the word$ "theot:etically:'"or .. accordipg involve ph::king people up who look iike they need a ride, as Jake Ktm to such and such a modef',ro&nyJi~w~:Iwish}could go_backt_~ _ L&T:~tand ? Chris PJ~~r did; :~-r-• trt:Jdso c~'ri;iders a little helpfulness an improper up on stage and say the uf~word" until my eyes fall out. In L&T thi$ would way t() obtai(} "high social standing.~ be considered poetry. Of course.! wo~ld. not rhyme it with truck. buck. -~ ... - But it's aU over riow. This ts my last column. and before you start accost- or wherever it is that I hang out, I w~nt to remind you duck, or suck or maybe even "Jurgen Habermas. II ing me in the library, I wish I could be oppressed. People at Bard seem to believe that Kth.ey that"U~::we _ B¥d.';To lqve. som~tl1ing you must be J1on.est with it. or you will complain enough to Leon, Stu and Dimitri (LSD) about being oppressed, soon he lov{ng yourself more than you love the object of your affections. To they will get .. special privileges." At~ll.ugh it is_ my betlef that aU of Bard's Sure. th~re are problems at Bard, but there are problems with everything. benefits should be extended to alfstt1dents~ regardless of howthey. or their that end: anyone who highlightS what .they think are problems at Bard is staff ancestors. entr~red the country.·soiri~ teil ~e . ii-l~t_oppression carries wHii it .;. · ctoing ·Bard a servke; ·1 · want to thank atr the. students, faculty, and certain benefits at Bard that that I wa{~?ware of. Perhaps the oppressed ~embers who have been strong enough to point out some of the festering are no people are the ones who the Bard S.eciidtY dispatchers are always polite to. beef h1 appan!ntly sacred cows. In fact, on the pasture of Bard, there If I had to do it allpver. Tw9U:t((Jlijve, ,t~ken.an MPZ or ~n 'lntegrat.ed . ~~~reg cow~~ ~!l~t~tlY9.ne \V)lo claims that some institutional cow Is sacred, ArtsH course. This way, I could recqrd tl1~-sound of my typing· and c.au it probably has som~thing to hide. which is profoundly anti~ Bard. If a cow .. letter. anoth'er project. While doing this. t ~ish Ulatt couHhave contemplated'mY .feels thad£ has been"\.vrorigly butchered, it can respond by writing a sexual identity. 1 don't really knoW. what ''contemplatinr5 one's. sexual idell~ and eventually the truth shall prevail, and everyone shall know the truth. DOSO Ober Alles Diary of a madman: T·he Case Filer de~ails Bard political intrigue suspicions that first What follows is a journal of things that might have hap August lOth: Newly promoted Dean of Residence Life and "asked to leave." Proving DOSO's the student complies. pened at Bard. Most of tht! journal entries are true, Unitnsity of Delaware graduate Leah LaValle declares her year student are na'ive and stupid, though some of them,did not actually happen. Anyone self to be the sole arbiter of right and wrong on campus August 22nd: A dancer is found to be thin, and one of the with half a brain should be able to tell which is which. and proceeds to tell people to pour out their beer. Leah highly qualified people at the DOSO insists that the dancer is However, for the common-sense impaired, I have itali La Valle explains th

November 4th: Dean of Forei)!TI Stu.dcnts Amy Amell asks a ravine by Leah La Valle, who was feeling rather queasy is w "go fuck November 25th: The idea of requiring sperm samples this morning, after a night of drinking with . to be Jlaid the same as a regular Dean. She is told and mixed up dropped, after many are unable tu pwvide sperm samples friend. As always, EMS is called, by an every yourself." her British after Leah LaValle walks in on them, ordering th~m ru PC.. In a freak accident, Bard EMS symbolic struggle against reality, PIE happy-to-panic November 7th: ln a "seek counseling." Rune Lind suggests that instead of the person with alcohol, and Leah LaValle Canham announces that things in South pumps Student Michael giving an actual sperm sample, he "shP\lt" technically disgust at the presence of so much oxygen in perfect. This ret'Clation shocks many. Le<1h expresses Africa arc not proficient films, tu not lmly help DOSO, but also to com Leah is heard iu comment, "I can't go in there, busts herself, after an anonymous rip from a mys the room. La Valle plete his senior prl1ject. The New York State Pnlice hilVC because _if there is t•omit, l am in there O.Jomiting with you!" terious PC known only as "Nick Gagne." <1 good laugh at thb idea, but wht.:n reminded that pns that September 16th; In an effort tu increase Bard's reputation, November 8th: In an effort to rdive the offense session of a video of a 17-year-dJ Bard student mastur- article on how the fulks at Ludlow conduct an analysis of sun!ey resJxmscs many felr after reading Michael Canham's . bating might be a crime, decide to leave Bnrd stu.dent:; by Bard freshmen and find that they have an abnormally high the new South Africa sucks, thtJusands start reading_ alone to jnk off during pnetry reading in L& T. column on clouds, time, and hugging. number of smokers in comparison to entrants at other "pres~ Shawnee Barnes's November 26th: A C•)lnposit~ ,,r Bard senil)rs announce tiKious" schools. Ludlow responds by banning the sale of cig November 9th: Dat•id Ca.se points but that after calling that they are straight once again. arettes in the campus bookstore . Abigail Rosenberg not hm•e an assurance of confidentiality, EMS, students do Nov~mber 27th: Former Associate Dean of Residence exp September 19th: Leah La Valle is officially placed on the what Brock's stance inside the black bithlcrs arc, in fact, ~cniur prpcnsMi•ll1 tu rt•lease :1 non-hn.':lthing entity, on the condition that it nnt October 5th: After feeling oppre~ed for awhile, a group of Bard stu.. and the college is released I}elegation or Russia. Although of studc~ts announce that th~!y are "very oppressed," and give birth to baby collt:ges in France liberally interpret th~.: although they cannot quite explain why, they say that this conditiun sadden:; LSD, they dents complains to Leon concdt•c colleges , thtTe shuuld be some changes at Bard. Pnpe 's words, and figure that it is okay to so lung as they don't J'ay the J'rofessurs, as Rttssian Jlrufcssors October 7th: Tlu.: changes are made. It is unknown if pater.. Botstein about the don't seem to et•er Ket jJaid, anyway . the studen.ts arc still oppressed. December 6th: The Col!t:ge is forced tu attend a meet October lOth: SaddamHussein decl.£l.res himself to be nalistic attitude of of Students Jonathan Beckl.'r. Becker says multi-disciplinary, oppressed, Jiverse, cross-discipli ing with Dean college's problems, and nary, and above all, "ethnically sensitive." A delega Security, DOSO, and the th pfeaseb·at~~g with Michael Haggerty newspaper. It is published every other Moncby and 1s dis ~ -'. two . hard-copy printouts. Send submissions via. campus Contributors DaviJ Case Jenny Erpscn tributed free . .on . campus and in nearby_ communities. ! maH to the coriesporiding sed:ion editor: Elissa Nelson Devon Ludlow Is to . . - - - ... 1 . AlU~tt~rs . 8~ -~-~.-~iJf.H!.~ , ~illl}U Robinson or Meredith Everyone welcome submit. Lauren Martin Leah Zanoni _ -phot()gtaphs .. posstbi~. The d~adline for all submissions~ be they stories, car- . Yayanes. S.~I:Jmit; d~veloped if Jnel Hunt Andy Vmyu toons. photographs. statistics. or advertising, is 2 p.m. on preferably tn the commercial 4X6 _print size. w~-~trongly Michael Canh

l•)~lll~if OOJ~I~!,~i'7 HOLIDAY EXPRESS SHUTTLE BARD COLLEGE TO STEWART AIRPORT $50.00 $30 EACH FOR 2 OR MORE BARD COLLEGE TO POUGHKEEPSIE .TRAIN $25.00 EACH $18 EACH FOR TWO OR MORE Nov. 1997 • .Jan. 1998 Thanksgiving & Christmas Break! Call Today '& Make Your Reservations! ~. 485-BBOO .; : :.: · -=:; - ·-:.:::----:-.----:------THE BARD OBSERVER SPORTS MONDAY, DECEMBER 15, 1997 15

of around ten billhm) within the next three years. AgainstVassar College, a mere 30 miles away, thl.! Y Chromosomes Bard Bloodies Bard Women's Basketball te~1m, in the full forty-eight minutes of play, scored four ( 4) pnints. TI1is t'narks a Doubt new record in the NCAA history books, making Bard are in the holder of the 1.ificious title: least amount uf points Brooklyn scored in a b;1sketball game played by n women's divi Some male sports sion 3 NCAA ream, ever. tend to leave out the man Men take it hard Fear not, intrepid sports fanatics, it's not all that bad. At Vassar the B.ud women played without either By JEREMY DILLAHUNT, Sports Editor everywhere but the hoop of their starting guards, Abby "Smurf fisLs" Rosenberg and Kalia "Jordan <1in't got nothing" Papadaki. While By JEREMY DILLAHUNT, Sports Editor "Face it, fencing is a g(ly sport. I mean as far as they the fearless Raptorettes knew that the Vassar game than it <1s

Bot-man, Issue fi Volume 2

Ll$Te N 13o7; 'f'ou CAN 'Bl:AT HIM. J.M~ /4. SuM.

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