Where Men and Gods Fear to Tread (Beyond the Lies)

Where Men and Gods Fear to Tread (Beyond The Lies)

A view of religion in the past, a sense of the present, and speculation for the future.

By: Justin Ronk

A view of religion for the past, a sense of the present, and speculation for the future.

By: Justin Ronk

I dedicate this book to those in my family who have passed on, leaving their legacies behind.

I also dedicate this book to all those people who opened my eyes over the years, and helped me grow to see what life truly is, either with their hate or their love, their intelligence or stupidity, and to the great artists of this planet- who have shown me that there is more than the concrete existence, through subtle and sublime beauty.

Preface

“I can only show you the door. You must walk through it.”

- The Matrix

Here, in the first lines of this book, I offer you, my reader, a choice- choose between the red pill and the blue pill. Take the blue pill, and you can continue to follow paths of delusion and deception at your whim; put this book down and never open it again if you choose this path, if you genuinely believe that the entire world is perfect and entirely fit to pass to the next generation. However, take the red pill, and we’ll see just how deep the rabbit hole goes; straight to the heart of humanity, past the shallow exterior, past the rotting interior, straight to the core, the true base of humanity. Come and see the deceptions paraded before the eyes of man, and the extent to which they have infiltrated our society.

Mine is the path of transcendence, not of shut-minded feeble worship, not of sanguine insanity, and not of fearful tribute. The times I live in are plagued with conflicts of every sort, many of them caused by the evil of religion. The forces of fundamentalist Christianity are forcefully converting all of the innocent souls they can wrap their fingers around, the terroristic Islamic are killing rampantly in order to get to Heaven and the seventy-two virgins they believe to be waiting for them there. The Hindu have taken to a policy of nonviolence and continue with their timeless polytheist worship. The Buddhists are slaughtered for protesting the oppressive regimes above them. Religion has historically been a travesty. Just

look at the Crusades. Look at the Holocaust. Look at the atrocities of the Olmec’s descendants, the barbarian sacrifices to Huitzilopochtli. Look at the resulting genocide of the Aztec, Mayan and Inca. The world is a mess, a cesspool of violence and misconduct. Nations war with each other over simple trivial matters, differing ideas. Religion tears people apart, instead of bringing them together.

This is not the enlightened way. All deserve to be part of something wholesome, whether it be a philosophy, ideal, or religion. Nothing should be left up to question lest I pose it, which is something that those “Holy Books” fail to do.

Take my teachings upon yourself only if you are of an open mind- a closed mind reading my lessons will not understand any of what I say. A closed mind will relay my lessons through their flawed understanding. Fools will fail to comprehend what I say, and they will flock to their false prophets who spit half-truths and seek to glorify themselves and exploit their followers, for power and money. Those leaders will denounce my word and ban it and all of the heretical truths it contains. This action is not a show of courage. It is a show of fear. They fear losing their status and their money if they cannot preach false doctrine. If you are one of those poor souls who has been brainwashed by a liar, let me ask: would you rather have my book remove the blindfold from your eyes, and see the world for what it is, or follow the way of one who wishes that you surrender your consciousness to them for their own gain, and follow a deceiver to your death and the damnation of your soul? Regardless of what you may believe about how

you’re being led, if you are a member of any religion, that question probably applies to you.

I am sadly bound by time and existence, which means that I cannot make this book as comprehensive and circumspect as I would like. I would explain every legend and fundamental concepts of all noteworthy candidates in any area, but I simply do not have the time, for even if I had a hundred years to myself this book would not be complete. This book could easily be the longest written document to ever come forth from the hands of man if I did, and it would be a work of sublime and subtle beauty instead of a logical analysis/didactic polemic. So, if you do not understand a certain concept that I discuss further into this book, please check the recommended/reference reading at the very end.

Also, keep in mind my purpose for writing this book- if times were not so dire, with countries aiming nuclear weapons at each other and unstable individuals holding the triggers, I most certainly would take at least a quarter century or more to compile this book. However, I believe that this world may very well need this document you have in your possession before then- I seek to change the world. I seek a better world. I do not hold any grand expectations; perhaps my hope that this book will change anything is nothing more than a delusion. I do not expect that I will change the human state of mind- I simply hope, and that is all I can do at this moment, at this meeting of space and time.

In many aspects of this book, I am sorrowful to report that I cannot go as ‘in- depth’ as I would like, either. I may gloss over events or beliefs that you, personally, consider important. In my defense, I must point out that every sub- division of every religion is most likely not as ‘different’ from the main system as you may believe. I apologize in advance for marginalizing the beliefs of importance to anyone reading this.

I must apologize to those of you who fancy yourselves ‘intellectuals’- I refuse to use unnecessarily complex or obscure words to describe a sentiment that is otherwise wholly valid by use of common phrase. If you’re reading this book solely to impress your friends by your command of language, then you will be sorely disappointed. Not mention, as I’m sure that you have already noticed, I like to use first person pronouns and second-person perspective- not quite the workings of a literary masterpiece, even from the start.

I warn you- do not tamper with these texts, skip over sections or paraphrase my teachings. One must look upon my word for themselves to understand what it is.

They must view the tapestry of words I weave for themselves, with every thread in place. However, that is enough preface for now; prepare yourself, for the learning begins…

Table of Contents

Book I- Gods and Demons ------9

I:I- DEITIES ...... 9 I:II- MONOTHEISM ...... 12 I:II:I- Judaism and Christianity- God and Satan ...... 12 I:II:II- Islam...... 17 I:III- POLYTHEISM ...... 19 I:III:I- Hinduism ...... 19 I:III:II- Greek and Roman ...... 24 I:III:III- Aboriginal and Tribal Worship ...... 27 I:III:IV- Paganism ...... 29 I:IV- MONISM ...... 31 I:IV:I- Buddhism ...... 31 I:V- DUALISM ...... 37 I:V:I- Zoroastrianism ...... 37 I:VI - FAR EAST RELIGION ...... 41 I:VII- WESTERN RELIGION ...... 43 I:VII:I- North American Religions ...... 43 I:VII:II- Olmec & Descendants/Nahua Religion ...... 45 I:VIII- URRELIGION ...... 53 I:VIII:I- The Empty One ...... 57 I:VIII - AMERICAN-SPAWNED CULTS ...... 60 I:IX- ATHEISM ...... 70

Book II- History of Religion ------74

II:I- IN THE BEGINNING… ...... 77 II:II- BEFORE THE COMMON ERA ...... 93 II:III- THE COMMON ERA/ANNO DOMINI ...... 122 II:IV- THE DARK AGES ...... 152

Book III- Grievances of Religion ------171

III:I- GRIEVANCES OF THE GOD OF THE JEWS ...... 171 III:II- GRIEVANCES OF THE DHARMIC RELIGIONS ...... 217 III:III- GRIEVANCES OF THE NAHUA RELIGIONS ...... 223 III:IV- GRIEVANCES OF ATHEISM ...... 227

Book IV- Philosophy and Religion ------235

IV:I- PHILOSOPHIES OF THE GOD OF THE JEWS ...... 237 IV:I:I- Judaism ...... 237 IV:I:II- Christianity ...... 244 IV:I:III- Islam ...... 251 IV:II- PHILOSOPHIES OF ZOROASTRIANISM...... 255 IV:III- PHILOSOPHIES OF THE DHARMIC RELIGIONS ...... 261 IV:III:I- Hinduism...... 262 IV:III:II- Buddhism ...... 266

IV:IV- PHILOSOPHIES OF THE NAHUA RELIGION ...... 272 IV:V- PHILOSOPHIES OF THE URRELIGION ...... 278

Book V- A Look Forward ------284

V:I- WORST CASE SCENARIO ...... 285 V:II- IF THINGS PERSIST ...... 295 V:III- THE REVIVAL ...... 299

Book VI- A Personal Note ------302

VI:I- MY LIFE STORY ...... 303 VI:I:I- The Fall from Grace ...... 304 VI:I:II- Other Details ...... 315 VI:II- MY BELIEFS ...... 323 VI:II:I- Religious Beliefs ...... 323 VI:II:II- My Master ...... 331 VI:II:III- Political Beliefs...... 343 VI:III- PERSPECTIVES UPON RELIGIOUS MATTERS ...... 352 VI:III:I- General Religious Matters ...... 352 VI:III:II- Enlightenment ...... 382 VI:III:III- Religious Truth ...... 391 VI:IV- PERSPECTIVES ON CULTURE ...... 402 VI:V- PERSPECTIVES ON SOCIETY ...... 417 VI:VI- MISCELLANEA ...... 432 VI:VI:I- Health ...... 432 VI:VI:II- Nature ...... 448 VI:VI:III- Effort ...... 454 VI:VI:IV- Education ...... 461 VI:VI:V- Wisdom ...... 464 VI:VI:VI- Other Stories ...... 466 VI:VII: IN CONCLUSION ...... 532

Book VII- Addendum ------534

Works Cited/ Recommended Reading ------548

Book I- Gods and Demons

“I know that without me God cannot live a moment;

If I am destroyed He must give up the ghost.”

- Angelus Silesius

I:I- Deities

Deities are beings of immeasurable power who have left this existence for another, but still choose to interfere in this one from time to time. A scientific theory of this time holds that there is a fourth dimension outside of this third one where we exist, and that dimension is time in its entirety. The most logical explanation for divinities is that they are beings of some sort who reside in said dimension, or perhaps even further beyond in terms of dimensional capacity.

Remember that divine beings are just theoretical1. There is no real proof that they exist, and there cannot ever be proof that they exist. They either choose this way voluntarily, or they do not exist at all. So, thus, we are left with the God probability- there is a 50-50 chance that some kind of god exists, and all secular

‘proof’ otherwise cannot sway the equation in one way or the other.

1 I must apologize to my atheistic readers, for they may find this first book nauseatingly religious. I will warn you that I am of theistic belief, but I hold respect for atheists as well. Our ultimate goals are very similar in nature- we seek the betterment of man outside of doctrines.

However, the formation of religion (and deities) is a great fuel for atheists- because, without exception, the climate in which a people live determine what religions form there. Monotheism forms in the desert and Polytheism forms in areas populated with large bodies of water, such as rivers, lakes, etcetera.

Religion that we would best classify as ‘other’ forms in the mountains. Anyhow, this reinforces the idea that religion is just a reflection of the environment: “So, the one god only shows himself to desert dwellers, but the pantheon of gods only show themselves to river folk. How odd.”

This idea is formed by the perceptions of primal man, who originally created these religions thousands of years ago. In the desert, there is only one thing- the sun. The sand is sometimes stirred by the wind. However, near water, there are many things- trees, animals, and the body of water itself. Not to mention, the climate is generally more dynamic in humid places.

Religions fall into general categories based upon their place of origin and the nature of their teachings- religions such as Judaism, Christianity and Islam are categorized as the ‘Abrahamic’ religions, those like Buddhism, Hinduism and

Jainism are ‘Dharmic,’ those of the Aztec and Maya are ‘Nahua,’ and practically everything else falls into the category of ‘Pagan’ or 'Tribal,' with one special exception that I discuss later.

Also remember that this section is just an overview- it is by no means comprehensive. If one of these various religions I describe sounds interesting, feel free to take it upon yourself to research it further.

I:II- Monotheism

“If God has made us in his image, we have returned him the favor.”

–Voltaire

Monotheism is a relatively simple concept to explain. In the typical situation, monotheists believe in an all-powerful god who is the most powerful being conceivable in the universe and there is nothing beyond him. This god is typically the one who created the Earth and all life on it.

I:II:I- Judaism and Christianity- God and Satan

“No one has seen God at any time.” – John 1:18

Judaism is the precursor religion to Christianity, and the Old Testament (of which several important Hebrew scriptures are a part of) takes up the bulk of the

Christian bible by volume alone. It is necessary to include talk of Judaism in while discussing Christianity simply because of the impact of Judaism on the formation of Christianity. There were other profound impacts, but the simple fact remains that without the existence of Judaism, Jesus would not have been hailed as the

Messiah, and therefore been an ineffectual in the grand scheme of things, since he likely would have lacked disciples without ‘prophecies’ which led to a somewhat proof of his claim to godhood.

But before I start flying off the handle, I should give a better description of the religion. While 1/3rd of the world’s population believes in Christianity, I can guarantee you that the vast majority of them have never even read the Bible in its entirety (1). Admittedly, neither have I, but I make no façade of being a follower of

Christ. Granted that I was once upon a time back in my youth of about six to thirteen, I have shed the coil of Christianity and moved on to what I perceive as more ‘relevant’ pursuits of religion. Confining oneself to Christianity is like an international corporation refusing to do business in the Old World, focusing solely on the Americas. It may be more specialized and tailored to its specific markets, but it greatly lacks in the expansive department because of declining opportunities in open markets.

Judaism is a belief in the Tetragrammaton, the god YHVH. As their transliterated alphabet lacks vowels, as well as the letters J and W, this can be interpreted as either Yahweh or Jehovah1. For whatever reason, most Hebrew folk tend to refer to their god as Yahweh, and many Christians refer to theirs as Jehovah (such as the Jehovah’s Witnesses, obviously).

The Old Testament god is worshipped because of his apparent omnipotence, omniscience, but conveniently not omnibenevolence like the Christian god, as the Old Testament god is a being of wrath and jealousy. With the advent of

Christianity and the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth, the Tetragrammaton was

1 Somehow we also ended up with Adonai or Elohim for names of the Tetragrammaton.

seen in a more friendly and caring light, which essentially is why Christianity and

Judaism are even different religions.

Now, Jesus is essentially god in the Christian way of thinking. He is part of the

Holy Trinity; the Father (Tetragrammaton), the Son (Jesus), and the Holy Spirit

(up for interpretation). Jesus came down from the heavens to the Virgin Mary and was born of immaculate conception but human in the flesh, much like the Greek hero Hercules and a smattering of other such incidents in lore. The teachings of said demi-god (who is apparently still a full-fledged god at the same time) are the basis of Christianity. Well, not really. Contrary to what your Christian buddies might think, Jesus did *not* write the Bible. Nor did the Tetragrammaton write the

Old Testament. If they were in fact divine beings, it would follow logically that a book that was perfect and filled with nothing but hard evidence and revelations is what would come down. But, that brings us to another story is what said Christian buddies might argue.

In the book of Genesis of the Bible, the story is told of the creation of the world in a week- six days of work, one day of rest. Apparently, despite God’s perfect creation, the angel Lucifer1 betrayed this perfection of creation and lead an army consisting of 1/3rd of the angels against god, who were defeated and cast into a place called Hell. However, this story is not told in the canonized Bible. It is mainly told in part of the Bible called ‘The Apocrypha,’ a series of books that

1 Lucifer was apparently the greatest of the angels and the leader of the choir which praised God’s name endlessly.

have been omitted from the Bible proper. This particular book is called ‘The Book of Enoch,’ one that deals greatly with the story of the fall of man and Lucifer (2).

How this much common knowledge is contained with an apocryphal book of the

Bible is beyond me, but regardless, much of the lore that surrounds Satan/Lucifer is contained within said book.

Well, back to the main point of the overview of Christianity. Christians believe that not only must you be a good person to enter Heaven (the good place); you must accept Jesus as your lord and savior to do so. Now, I’ve heard differing opinions on what it is that sends people to Hell (the bad place), but the general consensus among the population is (a) not being a good person and/or (b) not being a Christian.

The Holy Trinity is yet another concept that is commonly used in practice by much of Christianity. This idea states that the Tetragrammaton, Jesus, and the

‘Holy Spirit’ are in fact all one entity, and that entity pervades all of existence.

Another core belief held by pretty much all Christian sects to my knowledge is a sacrament called ‘Communion1,’ wherein a piece of bread and a cup of wine is substituted for Jesus’ body and blood which he supposedly gave for all of mankind. The church as a whole consumes these items as a sort of symbolic ritual which is supposed to be reminiscent of The Last Supper.

1 Or ‘Eucharist,’ if you’re feeling fancy.

Yet another pretty much universal ritual of Christianity is one known as Baptism, which can be performed once or more in a Christian’s life- typically, more than one is actually not necessary given doctrine, but people like to do it anyhow because of ‘re-dedicating their lives to Christ’ or some such.

That is about it for our brief overview of Christianity. As peachy as Christianity sounds in modern terms, I’d ask that you read the New Testament of the Bible and try to compare and contrast with the church across the past two-thousand years. It’s quite a disparity, if I say so myself… but I cover that point later in the book.

I:II:II- Islam

“Nothing is so common as to imitate one's enemies, and to use their weapons.”

-Voltaire

Islam is a monotheistic religion that was founded in the deserts of Arabia by the prophet Muhammad Ibn Abdalla Ibn Abd Muttalib (Muhammad the common name in use), and the name Islam means “submission.” Islam is the third in the line of Abrahamic religions, after Judaism and Christianity.

Islam is indeed a very interesting religion. They claim to worship the same God as the Jewish and Christian faiths, but their teachings are so very radically different and almost perverted ideas construed from the Bible.1 Their prophet,

Muhammad, did indeed live and die a man, but he and his bloodline were supposedly ‘blessed’ by their god Allah, according to a certain faction of Muslims.

They believe that these blessed by the bloodline of Muhammad are the only ones fit to preach his word. Other factions believe that anyone who is righteous and holy should be able to become a priest. This ideal is causing much conflict today-

People are killing each other over tiny differences, such as qualifications for priesthood. Thousands have already died in the name of petty differences such as this.

1 Still, from an objective outside eye, they are nearly identical in nature. The doctrines and goals are very similar; they just hate each other so they refuse to acknowledge their own similarities.

From what I understand, Muhammad based the idea of Allah on one of his tribe's pagan gods from the time before he became enlightened. I believe that

Christians, Muslims, and Jews all worship the same deity, and yet Christians cite that the name Allah is the name of the pagan god of the moon, power, and other things. ‘Allah’ is simply the name for the deity- it is not the same god. Also worth mentioning, Allah is simply the Arabic word for God; if you were traveling in the

Middle East, you would say ‘Allah’ instead of ‘God’ if referring to your god should you be Christian or Hebrew.

The wide definition of ‘infidel’ in the Islamic religion contains the Christians and the Jews- why is it that you would defame and demonize those that serve the same god as you?

I:III- Polytheism

“Religion is another name for the realization of Truth. It consists in becoming and

being one with the Supreme Being. Doctrines and dogmas are only details of a

secondary nature.”

– Swami Narayanananda

I:III:I- Hinduism

Hinduism is a rather vague term used to describe the religious practices of ancient India, and while most Hindu have a common set of gods (called devas, goddesses called devis) such as Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva and Ganesh, various groups place emphasis upon worshipping different gods. For example,

Vaishnavism is the worship of Vishnu, Shaivism is the worship of Shiva,

Shaktism is the worship of the Devi consorts of the three main Devas, and

Smartism is what you would call ‘Hindu universalism.’ Generally, when I speak of

Hinduism, I’m talking about Vaishnavism instead of Shaivism, Shaktism or

Smartism.

However, outside of ‘conventional’ Hinduism (Shaivism, Vaishnavism, Shaktism,

Smartism) there are even more sects and schools of thought that are thrown under the big umbrella category of Hinduism such as Jainism, Sikhism,

Bhaktism, and Sufism. Of those various schools, there are even more

subdivisions, but I won’t go any further into them. Instead, let’s get back to mainstream Hinduism.

The trinity of Hindu gods (comparable to Christianity’s trinity) is Shiva, Brahma and Vishnu. Shiva is the God of Destruction- a six-armed dancer who is respected, not feared, for the Hindi know that destruction will inevitably follow creation- on a side note, Shiva is the Hindu god whose followers often smoke marijuana as a religious sacrament (3). Brahma is the God of Creation- He created the earth, man, beast, and all other life. Priests are called Brahmans to honor him. Then there is Vishnu- the Preserver, the one who keeps us along this path for as long as possible between creation and destruction. Vishnu is called

‘All-knowing’ and ‘Omnipotent.’

However, in the scope of things, the current incarnation of Hinduism with

Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva as the main gods is a fairly recent development. In the earliest Hindu document, the Rig Veda, Vishnu is mentioned only in passing, and Brahma and Shiva are completely ignored. Instead, the document focuses mostly upon the gods Indra, Agni and Soma. Indra was the god of storms, Agni the god of fire, and Soma the god-incarnation of an intoxicating beverage of the same name. Interestingly enough, when I read the descriptions of Indra in the

Rig Veda, he bears a striking resemblance to Zeus of the Greeks and Thor of the

Norse.

Hinduism was the second religion to be formed, after the various worldwide forms of paganism but before Judaism, and it still is around and strong in number. There are several religions not affected in the slightest by Hinduism, but they were all New World, Native American in origin.

The Vedas is the blueprint for the Bible, the Torah, the Qur’an, and several of the

Buddhist Sutras that are used to decipher Buddha’s teachings. The teachings of the Vedas also provide forerunners to Christianity’s Heaven and Hell, through the use of Karma. Hindus believe that individual soul ‘Atman’ and the world soul

‘Brahman’ are connected, and through that link all life is bound. The enlightenment, ‘moksha’ in the religion, is reached by fully comprehending the link between the two. Karma also plays an important part in the religion- if you are a vile person, vile things will happen to you in this world and the next world.

However, people reincarnate in their religion, either higher or lower in society based upon their karma in a past life. The only way to escape this cycle is through achieving moksha, and passing on to the next reality to continue your learning and perhaps the cycle continues from there.

The idea of reincarnation and only the enlightened being able to break the chain is a very interesting prospect- it has some basis in society, granted it is not scientifically plausible within the means we have at our disposal. If the most intelligent and wise people are not being reborn due to enlightenment but the

fools and imbeciles were, would it not result in a societal degradation much like the one I am currently observing?

Though Hinduism is indeed ancient, it would have to be close to or in excess of twenty-thousand years old to explain certain things- like the odd similarities it has with the Nahua religion (Aztec, Mayan, Toltec, and so on). Only in those two have I seen zoomorphic gods who send avatars1 to men, instead of ‘white Judeo-

Christian God’ or ‘Invisible formless gods.’

The Hindu state that we are currently (I assume this book isn’t going to last for

400,000 years2) living in Kali Yuga (literally, ‘Age of Kali’) which is the time of the most severe degradation of morals and values. This is presided over by the demon Kali, master of spiritual darkness, hypocrisy, suffering, and oh-so-many other wonderful sounding things. The Hindu have done a delightful job of describing this age in the Kali-Yuga, stating such things as a rising rate of abortions, increased rape and suicide rates, degradation of the family unit, genocide, and (surprise!) atheism. How delightful, their descriptions match the world perfectly. That’s encouraging.

1 Krishna is the one who comes to mind at the moment. He was an avatar of Vishnu who supposedly died during a bow-hunting accident in 3102 BC. Oddly enough, he is depicted as having blue skin, which is yet again a recurring similarity between Hindu and Nahua religion. 2 I find this number to be absurd; sure, time may very well be cyclical, but 400,000 is too large of an area in which to fit humanity. Why, according to science, our current incarnation of homosapien existence is about 200,000 years old. By Hindu logic, a full four-part cycle of the Yugas (Satya, Treta, Dvapara and Kali) occurs every 1,700,000 years or so, which is 8.5 times as long as our race has existed.

Kali-Yuga is the last of four cycles, and during each cycle things will steadily get worse. This particular Yuga (or age) is an era marked as beginning by the death of Krishna, and ending with the arrival of a man with the title of Kalki. Kalki will do battle with the demon Kali, subsequently vanquish him, and reset the cycle of degradation back to the highest point at the beginning of Satya Yuga. There’s several prophecies related to Kalki, but they vary from author to author in the various Puranas. My attempt to blanket it would be futile at best.

Hinduism is indeed an interesting religion, but will have to be left an open chapter for lack of total comprehension due to an incredible amount of scripture necessary for full understanding.

I:III:II- Greek and Roman

"All men's souls are immortal, but the souls of the righteous are immortal and

divine."

- Socrates

Greek and Roman deities are practically the same, just with different names-

Zeus is Jupiter, Hera is Saturn, Poseidon is Neptune, Hades is Pluto, Dionysus is

Bacchus, etc. I refer to them as one unit.

Now, everyone is very certain that these gods don’t exist. But back in the time of the Greeks and Romans, people observed and validated proof that these gods existed- today, this can be compared to a man praying for something, someone seeing his desperation, and pulling some strings to make it so. However, the man who prayed does not thank the man who helped him- he thanks God. Anyway, the story goes that Chaos eventually, through several generations, gave birth to the Titans, the king of whom was named Kronos. Kronos was a giant, and he knew that eventually he would have a son who would usurp his rule as king of the titans. Surely enough, he had three boys- Poseidon, Hades, and Zeus.

Kronos ate Hades and Poseidon1, but his wife hid away Zeus and encouraged him to destroy his father. Years later, Zeus created an army of the abominations that Kronos kept locked away in the pit of hell- Massive giants with one eye called Cyclopses, and horrible beasts with excessive numbers of eyes and arms.

1 He ate his daughters anyway, even though he knew his son was supposed to overthrow him.

With the help of these abominations and his lucky thunderbolts, Zeus cut open

Kronos and released his consumed brothers. They imprisoned Kronos in the deepest pit of hell, called Tartaros, since he was the God of Time, and time would cease to exist should he die. The gods split up the earth- Zeus had dominion over heaven and the land of the earth, Poseidon had dominion over the seas, and Hades had dominion over the underworld and the riches of man. This is another example of the Trinity seen in several religions, except these three were separate entities.

The gods were not bodiless beings, and for the sake of history they were very potent and promiscuous. The gods had several children by goddesses and several affairs with mortal women. Demigods and lesser gods were born by such methods. Of course, the Greek gods were probably just average people or war heroes elevated to a godly status, seeing as how Greek mythology could not possibly be correct, due to the fact that gods really don’t live on top of Mt.

Olympus. Mythology is much more clear-cut and not hazy like most other religions, making it much easier to prove false. But, there is some admiration in this- at least founders of this religion actually believed in what they taught, instead of lying and being cryptic to convert people. One of the only real values served by Mythology is how cut-and-dry it is, without veils and misinterpretations.

Christianity came much later than Greek mythology, yet it is horribly vague- now why would this be?

There is one particular Greek god who indeed interests me- Dionysus (or

Bacchus) is known as the god of revelry in these days, but his meaning has been lost over millennia. Dionysus was originally the god of humanity- thought, feeling, emotion, fertility, and yes, revelry. Dionysus was always portrayed with a flask of wine in one hand and a beautiful woman in the other, which makes you wonder- is hard-partying what the Greeks thought life was about?

I:III:III- Aboriginal and Tribal Worship

“I am the light I see in others; I am sun, so high above.

I am the sky, rich with color; I am the roots of the earth.”

-Liquid Bloom, Roots of the Earth

For some reason, tribal worship appears to have taken root everywhere in the world besides the areas where organized religions bloomed. Some would compare Paganism to it (found mostly in the northeastern hemisphere), but

Paganism is the worship of many gods of nature, not ancestors and spiritual powers. Most tribal worship focuses upon honoring or obeying the will of your ancestors, as far back as it goes.

Tribal worship’s main focus upon honoring and obeying culture often leads to a very strong family unit (i.e., entire family from grandfather to son living in one house) and some type of paranoia due to the idea of being watched by your ancestors at any given moment. Cultural degradation in the sense that we know it seems to occur at a much lower rate in tribalistic areas due to the way that the tribal folks practice their religion and subsequent lifestyle. However, there is very little room for personal expansion beyond the will of your ancestors/tribal gods; it may even be considered heresy if you surpass your ancestors in greatness. Who knows, perhaps aspirations are even considered a ‘sin’ in certain tribal communities?

Tribals are often perfect prey for converting forces that invade their countries

(Christianity and Islam, mainly) because much of the whole ‘obey tradition to a t’ thing gets old among the younger folk (doesn’t it always?) and they will often convert to a religion that becomes even more of a heritage than their own very strongly knit community. However, as in the book Things Fall Apart by Chinua

Achebe, much of the time things do not go so peachy as to just have the tribe convert and be done with it. Many of the folks that are more vested in their religion will refuse to convert (such as the older folk, medicine men, shamans, etc.), and subsequently cause civil wars among the tribes; the traditionalists versus the converted parties.

Often times, particularly during African and Native American campaigns by

Europeans, Christian monks were useful for thinning out areas of ‘heavy spiritual resistance’ via creating schisms among the populations of tribals. I’m not entirely certain whether or not this tactic was deliberate, but if it was, it is a very cunning, devious, and un-Jesus-like tactic to employ.

Once the tribe has split and a civil war has been brought to them to thin out their ranks, it is a simple matter for an invading force to come in and crush the remainder of the tribe. In a sense, the new religion ‘weakens’ them. How curious.

I guess there’s something to be said for the ways of the old gods after all.

I:III:IV- Paganism

“He offers a handshake, crooked five fingers

They form a pattern yet to be matched

On the surface simplicity

But the darkest pit in me is pagan poetry”

-Bjork, Pagan Poetry

Paganism is a very loosely defined term, taken to mean anything from ‘Non-

Abrahamic’ to ‘spiritualistic in nature.’ I use the term to describe a cultural sort of religion that does not seek to convert outsiders. So, in effect, that lumps together practically every form of religion older than 2,000 years that I do not specifically address. What many people consider ‘pagan’ also encompasses several types of tribal worship, as well.

Paganism has no real unifying texts or ideals, except that of celebration of life and many gods representative of the invisible. The pagans had a near monopoly on religion until the time of the Roman Empire, specifically the Christian reign of the Roman Empire. However, it is not a dead religion like many. Paganism lives on in the celebrations of the day. Even Christians honor pagan traditions-

Christmas was a Pagan holiday until the church decided it should be re- dedicated. So was Easter. The holiest days of the Christians were drinking and sex festivals for the pagans- how odd. The simple act of celebrating on these

days is an honor to the Pagan religion. Sadly, paganism is mostly practiced by pot-smoking acid freak college students or insane hermit Black Metal musicians who live in the frozen countryside these days. There remains very few who are directly involved with the religion.

Paganism is a very old type of religion- perhaps the oldest type of worship that still exists (even then, in very small numbers) and may well have been practiced for over 50,000 years, up to 200,000. It is worth something that across those years, not once have we had grand wars, killed each other due to racial bias, or sought to deceive others en masse for material gain.

I:IV- Monism

“The inevitable did unfold- oh well, a collection of particles held together by the

force of a soul and its memory. Be warned- you stand on the edge of infinity,

where colored waves will lead the way into the void.”

– Arcturus, The Chaos Path

Monism is a system of beliefs (or perception, rather) that dictates that all of reality is of one makeup (body and soul are one, the external and internal are of the same, etc); it implies wholeness and unity. In the case of Buddhism, monism means that reality exists at the whim of perception. All existence is as the individual perceives it; no less, no more.

I:IV:I- Buddhism

“In Buddhism, we have relative truth and absolute truth.”

–The Dalai Lama

Buddhism can be called an offshoot of Hinduism, but that is incorrectly categorizing it. You see, Buddhists follow the teaching of the great teacher

Buddha, who despite anybody’s objections had a revolutionary and intelligent solution to mankind’s problems. It is no coincidence that Buddhism is a practically problem-free religion if applied properly. Read any of the several

sutras which quote Buddha directly if you doubt this. Buddha was at one point a

Hindu, it is true, but he was not called Buddha at the time. He earned the title1 of

Buddha (enlightened one) from his extensive meditation and peaceful demeanor.

Buddha was called Siddhartha Gautama as a child, and he was a prince in a

Hindu kingdom. He did not really have much disdain for the way of his elders, but he felt a lacking in the teachings of Hinduism which he found odd; Hinduism taught that you should reject any earthly pleasures, but here his father was, a high-class man who preached that very word and had many riches. The story goes that Buddha was saddened by this, and sat under a tree to meditate for an extensive amount of time without food or water. Finally, it was said that a revelation came to him- Enlightenment is not brought about by depriving yourself or gorging yourself, it is brought about by a happy medium, a controlled ‘Middle

Way,’ which is the name that Buddha originally referred to his teachings as.

At the center of the Buddhist religion, there are several things referred to repeatedly, a few being the Four Noble Truths, the Noble Eightfold Path, and the

Three Jewels. Another interesting story is the one of the ten fetters of existence that must be broken over the course of four lifetimes.

1 Like the prophets of many religions, Buddha has many names that can refer to him: Buddha, Siddhartha Gautama, Gautama Buddha, or Shakyamuni Buddha.

The Four Noble Truths relate to the reality of suffering; its purpose, its origin, how to stop it, and the absence of it. The various branches of Buddhism take difference stances upon this matter, so I shall leave it up to their interpretations.

The Noble Eightfold Path consists of these eight factors: Right view, right intention, right livelihood, right action, right effort, right speech, right mindfulness, and right concentration. Some folks choose to add right knowledge and right liberation to the list.

The Three Jewels are the sources from which Buddhists are supposed to take guidance from. They are the Buddha Nature, the teachings of Buddha, and the company of the Enlightened.

The Ten Fetters must be broken before a human spirit can achieve complete nirvana and rejoin the unending nature throughout the universe. Those fetters are: Belief in an individual self, doubt or uncertainty, attachments to rites and rituals, sensual desire, ill will, lust for corporeal existence, lust for immaterial existence, conceit, restlessness, and ignorance.

As I understand it, Buddhism has the concrete goal of breaking the ten fetters and attaining nirvana. I am unsure how the other ideas fit in, such as the Noble

Eightfold path and the three Jewels- perhaps they are simply meant to help one on their way to enlightenment.

Even if an individual attains nirvana, then they have a choice to make; they can either sit back and become one with the universe, or they can take a vow (called a Bodhisattva vow) that they will use their knowledge to better their fellow man.

When an individual attains nirvana and takes a Bodhisattva vow, then he gains the title of ‘Buddha.’

However, not all Buddhas are given the same level of prestige as Gautama

Buddha, a Supreme Buddha, or the others he claims were before him. Arhat

Buddhas are those who are taught by a Supreme Buddha, and while not entirely commanding a thorough understanding of reality, they’re ‘good enough.’

Pratyeka Buddhas, conversely, are Buddhas who learn the truths of existence by themselves; however, they are not qualified to speak upon ultimate truth and the afterlife, and much like Arhat Buddhas they are considered ‘just good enough.’

That brings us to the subject of Supreme Buddhas. Buddhist tradition holds that there are currently twenty-eight Supreme Buddhas who have lived up until this point, and only one who is yet to come named Maitreya Buddha, the future

Buddha.

Maitreya Buddha is considered analogous to the Hindu Kalki, although a much more benevolent and less violent figure. For example, Kalki is frequently taken to mean ‘destroyer,’ while Maitreya typically means ‘friend.’ Unlike Kalki, Maitreya

Buddha has several rather specific prophecies based upon his life. Here are a few of them:

 The teachings of Gautama Buddha will be forgotten.

 Not even the lowest class of Buddha will be seen on the earth.

 Maitreya will attain enlightenment (Bodhi) in an incredibly short span of

time- seven days.

 He will traverse the oceans and spread his word, consequently redeeming

morality.

Authors of various works attest that Maitreya will be a whole load of different things during his life, and one would have to read practically every sutra that mentions Maitreya (no matter how obscure) in order to have ‘all the information necessary’ to judge an individual on the prophetic criteria.

Buddhism is considered a monist religion because of the belief that all reality exists as you perceive it; as such, if you cease to exist, so shall your reality.

Everything is relative to the individual, and yet the individual self is not supposed to exist. Buddhism, to me, is a religion of paradoxes, only understandable through considerable amounts of time spent thinking.

Buddha’s scale of growth without real conversion efforts is astonishing- Judaism practices a similar policy but maintains an approximate 10-20 million worldwide

membership, whereas Buddhism has a 300-450 million following. It can be argued that Buddhists do practice conversion efforts- however; telling a friend is about your newly-found sense of peace outside of the constraints of your religion doesn’t count in my opinion. Nor is joining Buddhism a rigorous and difficult task; it’s really quite simple, due to the fact that Buddhism as a whole is a less xenophobic religion than Judaism or many others.

Buddha was, contrary to public portrayal, a very skinny and gaunt man, not the fat, chipper fellow with children sitting on his lap. That man was a Buddhist monk named Budai who came several centuries later. Buddha was debatably the first man to transcend existence. However, he died, with his soul still attached to his shell. Thus, it can be said that Buddha did not truly transcend existence, as it is said of Jesus.

Gautama Buddha is one of the only men to form an entire religion around his ideals and proposals of existence. Yet again- this point is debatable- Jews claim that Abraham formed Judaism, but his forefathers before him practiced the same religion. Islam claims Muhammad, but he simply rewrote the Bible. Fact is, whether you accept it or not, Buddha may have been one of the single most influential (or manipulative- we may never know) individuals, on par with Jesus.

I:V- Dualism

“There is strong shadow where there is much light.”

-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Dualism, unlike monism, denotes two parts, and generally conflict between those two parts. However, they necessarily need not be in conflict, such as Lao Tzu’s

Yin-Yang (Yin and Yang coexist in balance). The most readily recognizable forms of dualism take the form of good and evil, light and dark, air and earth, fire and water… and so on.

I:V:I- Zoroastrianism

“A reflective, contented mind is the best possession.”

– Zarathustra, Ushtavaiti Gatha

The Avesta, the great book of the Zoroastrians, is linguistically dated back to a rough approximation of 1,000 BC1, written by the prophet Zarathustra (or

Zoroaster). Oddly enough, he formed a monotheistic religion amidst the polytheistic masses around him2. The general base of this religion seems to be

1 This date is constantly changing, almost uniformly backwards. Up until a short while ago, the date was 700 BC. More recent estimates have placed it at 1400 BC. 2 This is another one of those ‘special’ religions like Buddhism because it started in the mountains, according to the Avesta.

servitude to Ahura Mazda1 (their one and only god) and an unending conflict between truth and lies. Ahura Mazda’s works seek to create order in the world in order to battle the forces of chaos, with the final goal of perfect order and ultimate truth.

There are many ways that Zoroastrian scripture can be subdivided; either by era, author, or time frame. I separate the literature by both authorship and era, such as I will separate the part of the Avesta that Zarathustra wrote himself, called the

‘Gathas,’ from the other parts. Further, I separate the Avesta written by the clergy of Zarathustra’s time from the bits written by the later Persian clergy.

Zoroastrianism marks a paradigm shift in the way that humans came to perceive religion; perhaps it was due to Zarathustra, or maybe he was just going with the flow of the popular ideas of the day. However, that aside, the concept that makes

Zoroastrianism unique is that Zarathustra did not piss his pants when Ahura

Mazda showed up and scamper off to do his whim; he talked with him. He questioned him. He found out more than he needed to know. This stands in stark contrast to what pre-Zoroastrian religion was like, mostly along the lines of “Oh, our god told us to do this, better go do it so he won’t kill us.” The first few books of the Bible and the Rig Veda can attest to this.

1 Ahura Mazda’s name is commonly abbreviated to Ohrmazd, and Angra Mainyu is commonly abbreviated to Ahriman. Likewise, alternate forms of Zarathustra include Zoroaster and Zarosht. The practice of this religion can be called Zoroastrianism, Zarathustrianism, Mazdaism, and many other names.

Even more remarkable, however, is that Zarathustra did not force his religion on anyone. He preached when he came down from the mountain, and in the Gathas he counsels everyone to think upon what he had said, and to remember that they had a freedom of choice to believe whatsoever they chose. Needless to say, religion has regressed a staggering amount since then.

But the revolution doesn’t stop there: Ahura Mazda is mix of masculine and feminine names. Thusly, we view the creation of the first ‘androgynous’ deity, which I’m sure must have been a shock to the polytheists, who worshipped gods of a set characteristic. This is a creation that we later see in other religions, one such being Christianity.

Yet another idea that the Christians claim is original is present in Zoroastrianism-

Angra Mainyu is the spirit of deceit and evil, the antithesis to the creation of

Ahura Mazda. This is yet another original idea that the Christians ‘adopted without credit or permission’ from Zoroastrians, since the Jews do not have staunch beliefs in Hell or Satan, as such.

Insofar as monotheist or polytheist, this religion is difficult to classify. Ahura

Mazda is the one, the only all-powerful god, but there are so many other minor and less powerful deities- what Christians call angels and demons. Zoroastrians refer to their angels and demons as ‘ahuras’ and ‘daevas,’ respectively.

Zoroastrianism is the religion that breaks many moulds; it is not Dharmic,

Abrahamic, Nahua or Pagan. It has its own special little class due to the radical difference it has with the Dharmic and Nahua religions but is nonetheless a monotheism crafted separately (earlier, in all likeliness) from the Abrahamic ones. Proto-Abrahamic is the best classification I can come up with for it.

However, one thing that Zoroastrianism has in common with many modern religions and ways of thought is the belief in a benevolent savior whom they refer to as ‘Saoshyant,’ descended from the line of Zarathustra himself. The actual prophecy says that Saoshyant will be a direct descendant of Zarathustra and will be conceived by the preserved seed of Zarathustra in a lake by a woman bathing in said lake, and when Saoshyant is born his body will be ‘like the sun.’

Saoshyant fits into the same category as Kalki and Maitreya earlier; that is, he is most likely an adaption of the same idea from which they are descended.

Ahura Mazda, in itself, is a rather interesting perspective into the way that

Zarathustra perceived deity. Never before had an androgynous god been created, and contained within was everything ever created. The Hindu had their pantheon, and the Jews had Yahweh, but one man, alone, created this idea of god that is commonly accepted today as truth.

I:VI - Far East Religion

“To (offer) worship to other than one's own ancestral spirits is brown-nosing.”

-Confucius

In this category I place Confucianism, Shinto, and Tao. Confucius was a man who offered great insight into the reasons that things were done, and how they should be done correctly. He was indeed a wise philosopher, and always had something clever to say as advice. His ideas provided moral compass, and plans for development of society, and governed practically every aspect of life, except that he never specified what happens when you die.

Now, if my history lessons serve correctly, a disciple of Confucius was the one who started Taoism. Taoism is a religion based upon balance, a principle which I will bring up several times. They strived for balance in all things; in the mind, the body, and society. I consider balance an admirable pursuit.

Shinto is, as I understand it, a form of paganism practiced by Japanese people.

From what I have learned of the Japanese, they had heard the teachings of

Confucius and shunned them simply because he was a Chinese man.1 So, they

1 It is also worth noting that Japanese culture is descended from Chinese culture, despite how adamantly they will deny any association to each other. Japanese people are even ancestrally descended from Chinese people. If I recall my history correctly, the nation of Japan was formed by an offshoot of Chinese people who left mainland China.

continued to follow the ways of Shinto, honoring the spirit of nature and animals and such.

I would write more on these subjects, but due to the isolationism practiced by the nations that practice these religions, they have had very little impact on the world as a whole except for recent years (i.e. 200 or so). So, in my eyes, it is not really much of a necessity to include these religions in any discussion of major world religion’s impact on the world as a whole.

I:VII- Western Religion

“We do not inherit the world from our ancestors; we borrow it from our children.

Duty is upon us to return it to them in the absolute situation.”

-Unknown

I have much less to say about the Western religions than I do about the eastern ones, simply due to the fact that there is not much factual documentation on these religions, just speculation. I feel assured in stating that the genocide of the people that practiced this religion is deplorable. While I’m blowing your mind, I feel as though I should state other epiphanies here, like ‘Men and women are different’ or ‘You learn as you grow older.’

I:VII:I- North American Religions

“If you take the Christian Bible and put it out in the wind and the rain, soon the paper on which the words are printed will disintegrate and the words will be gone.

Our bible is the wind.”

–Tribe Unknown

There are several sects of the Indian religion, much like tribalism, but I will focus on the main similarities. Indians cannot be classified as either polytheistic or

monotheistic- the region and history varies greatly.1 The religion is based on feelings and emotion- there are many things that can be used to stimulate a more emotionally open state of mind, and a common one is psychedelic mushrooms.

These mushrooms grew on the underside of livestock manure that was left in the field solely for the purpose of cultivation for consumption. A chief or medicine man would consume these mushrooms in order to gain insight or introspection.

Again, like tribal worship, several sects of the Indian religion was based around ancestors; honoring them, obeying them, and communicating with them.

Midwestern Indians substituted or added on the flower of the peyote cactus to induce hallucination, making for a more profound experience. It is difficult to generalize upon the religion of the natives, since the diversity of the religions from tribe to tribe is so very large, and there are also very few surviving practicing religious Indians. I base all of my arguments about Indians from their displays of culture- war, art, and society. Other than that, I have no expertise.

1 I do not know the makeup of the entire country’s religion prior to Columbus, but I assume it follows the same general pattern- Monotheistic religion in the desert, Polytheistic religion near the water.

I:VII:II- Olmec & Descendants/Nahua Religion

“He who walks without looking will fall into trouble.”

- Mayan Proverb

The Olmec people were a Central American native society who gave rise to the religious and cultural practices of the various tribes that descended from them

(culturally, if not genetically) such as the Aztec, Maya, Toltec and others.

You cannot ever ask an Aztec about their religion- because there are none.

There may be Aztec blood that runs in a family, but nobody practices the religion, nobody remembers the culture, and nobody observes the traditions. The highest amount of Aztec blood you can find in an individual is half, these days- half

Aztec, half Spanish, all Mexican. There may be people under Aztec rule that survived the ordeal, but the Aztec themselves did not. So, as far as actually talking to someone on such a point, half is as good as it’s going to get.

In the Aztec religion, there were several rituals that served different purposes- most people are familiar with the sacrifices to Huitzilopochtli (the sun god) of human hearts in order to make the sun rise. Contrary to the way that a certain celebrity whose name rhymes with ‘Bell Libson’ portrayed them, they sacrificed prisoners of war and criminals, not people who they found out in the jungle, or their own citizens. Nor did they let them run loose after the sacrifice was over.

Should they have a surplus of criminals or other malcontents, they would set them to work as slaves until the temple of Huitzilopochtli called for them.

Nor were the Mayan barbarians- in the certain aforementioned actor’s attempts to grant himself legal immunity for the vulgar lies that he portrays as fact, he defamed the entire Mayan civilization simply so he would not be vulnerable to libel and slander lawsuits by every Hispanic with Aztec blood on the face of this earth1. The Mayans, however, were a more agrarian society, with less focus on such things as slavery and war. They, of the various indigenous tribes of the area, were the most artistic and scientific- signs of cultural status and progress. I do suppose they had a decent military force, seeing as how they kept the Aztec and Chichimec from toppling their empire.

The Aztec and Mayan cultures (among others) all had a special tea called ayahuasca, which contained the pure chemical compound in the human brain that causes religion and the feeling of supernatural existence. This chemical occurs at very low levels in the human brain- an average epiphany would be a tiny fraction of what a full cup of ayahuasca contained. This drug made people leave their bodies entirely and would sometimes make them leave this world in spirit- the reason that humanity believes in extraterrestrials is probably rooted in

1 Mel Gibson (the actor named above) seems to have built his entire career on fabricating events or overly dramatizing them (like in The Passion of the Christ). It doesn’t seem like too much effort to add a slide at the beginning, stating ‘This is all either a work entirely of fiction or an incredibly dramatic version of events already based upon biased reporting.’ Then again, what do I know? I’m just a stupid writer, who writes his stupid little books. I don’t know how the obviously intellectually superior world of Hollywood works.

the active chemical in this tea. The experience of ayahuasca is indescribable by words, and the priests who ingested it could not describe it to their people. The various gods are the result of their efforts to do so, representations of ideals and feelings of every man.

Hernando Cortez rode in on ‘deer without antlers,’ and the scouts out looking for such a sign probably paled with fear at his presence. Cortez is taught to be a conquistador, and a triumphant missionary. Cortez was not a good man. Cortez was an abomination. Cortez was the only person to ever successfully kill off an entire civilization and their culture, their religion, and them. Cortez was not a hero; he is one of the most despicable people to ever have lived. His genocide of the Central Americans was not driven by religious zeal; it was driven by the bane of men- gold. Cortez killed the Aztecs, burned their homes and sent them an eternal bitch-slap by building the capital city of New Spain on top of the ruins of

Tenochtitlan, all for gold. He showed no real interest in them until he learned that they had massive amounts of gold. Pizaaro later killed the Inca for the same reason; the difference is that some of them survived. Pizaaro may not have totally exterminated the Inca as Cortez had with the Aztecs, but he doomed them to fail, slowly and quietly. Again, as with the Native Americans, I base what I know on old scripts and foreign knowledge, since there are very few alive today who practice this religion. I am aware that there are a very select few who still follow the Mayan way of life. I give them my greatest blessings for triumphing in the face of adversity, discrimination, and overcoming the genocide.

But then again, did they deserve it? The single largest act of mass death to ever occur on the greater American landmass during peacetime, unmatched even yet today by the attacks on September 11th, 2001, occurred at the christening of the temple of Huitzilopochtli in 1498. The Aztec gathered ten thousand prisoners of war from dominated tribes nearby, and had them all killed in one fell swoop.1 The temple and streets nearby ran red with blood, and the Aztec rejoiced and reveled in the gore. I am not certain if the Europeans beheld this spectacle, and if they did it must have been absolutely gut-wrenching.

The Central American religions are indeed correct, given the stipulation that reality is simply as you perceive it. A feathered dragon may be just a symbol of how far humanity has come, yet how far it shall fall. Balance and duality existed in the Central American religions, too. Quetzalcoatl had a counterpart serpent,

Xolotl, with who corresponded to the Morning Star (Quetzalcoatl) and the

Evening Star (Xolotl). Quetzalcoatl and Xolotl were constantly eating each other’s tails, resulting in a symbol eerily reminiscent of the yin-yang of the Taoists. The accuracy of the prophecies are shocking, and several would discredit these because they are ‘vague’ or ‘very probable.’ Let me say this much- they set a year for their own demise, named their destroyer and foretold that Montezuma

1 The number of sacrifices at the Grand Temple is a subject of debate- ten thousand is a moderate estimate. The Aztec actually claim they killed more than eighty-thousand men in a four day period at the christening. However, historians debate that number, due to the fact that it was used as cultural propaganda by the Aztec, and later anti-Aztec propaganda by the Spanish. Also, the presiding priest would have to perform the sacrifice rites at an inhuman pace- roughly 20,000 per day, 830 per hour, 14 per minute, and one every four to five seconds. The temple did have chutes built in for quick corpse disposal, but probably not that quick.

would be stoned to death- and it all came true, and is documented by hundreds upon hundreds of men (rendering the possibility of historical inaccuracy nearly impossible). The calendar of good and bad days dictated by Mayans was correct.

The predictions of the Central Americans have been proven to be incredibly accurate.

Most of the Central American religions are fairly similar, and have ‘bled together’ in a sense. They generally worshipped gods that served like purposes, but with different names. Quetzalcoatl to the Aztec was Kukulkan to the Mayan, the Aztec

Tlaloc is called Chaac by the Mayan and Cocijo by the Zapotec.

The Mayan and otherwise religions are still somewhat of a mystery since there is still documentation to be deciphered and artifacts to be unearthed, but the Aztec way is probably about as clear as possible, so I shall attempt to describe the basic principles.

There are four great gods who created earth. Those four are Quetzalcoatl,

Huitzilopochtli, Tlaloc1, and Tezcatlipoca.

Quetzalcoatl, the feathered serpent, is considered the embodiment of civilization- progressive ideas, optimism, knowledge, and nature. He and Tezcatlipoca constantly fought over dominion of the earth, and were constantly destroying and re-making it. The Aztec say that this world in which we live cost Tezcatlipoca his

1 Some legends state that it was Xipe Totec instead of Tlaloc that helped create the earth.

foot, in order to lure an alligator, which he and Quetzalcoatl killed and turned into the earth. In stark contrast to the other gods, he denied human flesh as a sacrifice- he preferred butterflies, hummingbirds, and other small animals.

Tezcatlipoca is originally a Toltec god who was raised up to the status of creator god in order to counter the power of the Aztec god Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl is called ‘White Tezcatlipoca,’ and his counterpart is called ‘Black Tezcatlipoca.’

Epithets of Tezcatlipoca’s name provide a fairly accurate view of how the Aztec viewed him- ‘We Are His Slaves,’ ‘Enemy of Both Sides,’ ‘He By Whom We Live,’

‘Lord Of The Near And Nigh,’ and ‘Possessor of the Sky and the Earth.’ His name in Nahuatl (the common Central American language) means Smoking (or

Flaming) Mirror. His particular areas of dominion included obsidian products and jaguars.

Only one sacrifice was delivered unto Tezcatlipoca per year- one young man was selected by the sickly priests to live like a god for a year- feasting, riches, and orgies with four concubines. The year ended with a festival in Tezcatlipoca’s honor, and the young man would walk up to the altar and lay himself down upon the sacrificial stone. Thus, he died, and a successor would be chosen upon the moment of his death. Bernardino de Sahagún1, a Spanish missionary in

1 Sahagún (frequently called by his last name) writes extensively about Aztec culture and religion in his book Historia general de las cosas de la Nueva España, or Historia General (General History). Much of what we know is based off of Sahagún’s writings and images that he preserved from many of the converted natives post-conquest. He even learned how to speak and write Nahuatl (the language of the natives) in order to interview and convert the conquered more effectively.

attendance for one of the sacrifices, explicitly noted that this particular sacrifice strongly reminded him of Easter.

Tlaloc was the god of practically everything wet, including rain, hail, floods, thunder, lightning, and water in general. He had a realm to which he guided the souls that died from water-related afflictions, and it was called Tlalcon, an area of unending springtime, constantly in bloom and full of edible plants. The Spaniards stated that Tlaloc’s sacrifice of choice was drowned children- however, that idea comes from a single Spanish monk, and many other sources have speculated many different things, including the usual ritual heart extraction, immolation, or just using the tears of the children as a sacrifice.

Huitzilopochtli is the god of the sun and war, and the one whose sacrifices frightened the Spaniards so very much. The ritual involved cutting out the heart of a still-living human, tearing it out while it was still beating, placing it in a bowl in the hands of a statue of Huitzilopochtli, and then tossing the body down the stairs of the temple. Contrary to popular belief, sacrifice to Huitzilopochtli did not occur daily; it only happened on festive days or days of particular import, such as the christening of a temple or something of an equal caliber. It is said that he led the Aztec to the place where they built Tenochtitlan by giving the sign of an eagle perched upon a cactus clutching a serpent.

Several gods were depicted and sculpted holding mirrors- Huitzilopochtli’s mirror was clear, and Tezcatlipoca’s was hazy with smoke. It is logical to assume that the symbolism of these gods is that they exist within, as a reflection of the self.

Perhaps that is why their religion is so incredibly dualistic.

On an interesting side note, corruption and deception were considerably less prevalent things in Aztec society as compared to the Europe at the time. The

Aztec’s Flower Wars are perhaps the best example- Flower Wars were wars conducted solely for the purpose of keeping soldiers fresh, training new soldiers and gathering sacrifices from whatever other tribe felt like joining the Aztec in their endeavor. Sure, both sides would lose some soldiers, but they gained sacrifices and the dead soldiers had the privilege of dying in battle. The Flower

Wars needed no deception, power lust or misunderstanding to occur; it was really more like a sporting event than a conflict, particularly considering that

Aztec domestic sporting events usually ended with the losing team getting sacrificed if the spectacle was big enough, anyway.

Although, perhaps I give it too much credit. Several of their gods served rather otherwise stupid purposes. There was one god who the Aztec believed shot people with poisonous darts when they weren’t looking. Several of them have the same dominion, and have no real ‘individual power’ in a matter. But, your opinions are your own- come to your own conclusion.

I:VIII- Urreligion

“Even as a tree has a single trunk but many branches and leaves, there is one

religion- human religion- but any number of faiths.”

-Mahatma Gandhi

Urreligion is a phrase denoting ‘prime’ or ‘primitive’ religion. This phrase was conceived of by several (German) intellectuals, and it was actually used to describe Adam and Eve among the Christian ones. Perhaps I drink a bit too much and it has addled my perceptions, but I believe I have found the ‘Urreligion’ from which all other religions are descended.

Morality varies greatly from region to region and religion to religion. However, at every set of religious values there is a key set that I call ‘ethics.’ Morality is a product of religion, but ethics are basic human values such as ‘Don’t kill, don’t steal, help when you can,’ etc. Certain groups tie up their ethics in their religion as well, so that when the religion departs they become utterly sociopathic. Or, some religions are utterly sociopathic in certain regards (such as radical Muslims killing Jews).

There are three major deities from which all other are descended from- they are either a part, a combination or an entirely accurate representation of these three gods.

Nature- Nature is held to mean practically everything bound by natural law, which really is ‘everything’ so far as the human mind is currently concerned.

Thereby, nature is omnipotent, but not omniscient because it lacks conscious thought. Nature gave birth to the next two gods through the development of humans, and perhaps, more accurately, conscious thought; they exist because we exist, so to speak.

The Radiant One- This deity serves as a representation of ultimate truth, knowledge, happiness, enlightenment, power, strength, love and so forth. He has more names than any other god across cultural lines, to my knowledge. He is concerned mainly with progressing society and human nature in general. He is by no means some creature devoid of consciousness (as a matter of fact, his actions fit very snugly within the Darwinian Imperative). Various prophets claim to have met and spoken with the Radiant One, and have written down his words.

His appearance differs greatly across time, however one thing remains common- his skin is radiant.

The Plagued One- This deity serves as a representation of ultimate suffering; stupidity, sadness, despair, weakness, frailty, hatred, and so on. He is denied by many cultures, unlike the Radiant One, particularly in ‘feel-good’ religions. His goal is to cause humanity to suffer, and to eventually destroy the Radiant One

(though the Radiant One wishes to destroy the Plagued One as well). His

ultimate goal is to have our race annihilate ourselves and this planet on which we reside. Unlike the Radiant One, prophets have not claimed to have spoken to him- but he is a creature of deception, and it is very likely that they have met him, but he deceived them into thinking that he is a creature of light. His appearance, unlike the Radiant One, remains common across all time- he is a disgusting creature with a frail appearance1.

Certain religions (such as Zoroastrianism and Hinduism) are very few steps removed from the Urreligion, as shown by Zoroastrianism’s Ahura Mazda and

Angra Mainyu, and Hinduism’s Vishnu. Particularly in Zurvite Zoroastrianism,

Ahura Mazda and Angra Mainyu are both a product of a natural force. In

Hinduism, Vishnu spawns both good and bad things (Krishna and Kali are both manifestations of Vishnu), therefore he is an accurate representation of Nature2.

The Urreligious perception of time is a cyclical one- and why not? To ancient man, everything occurred in cycles- the sun came and went repeatedly, each time at a twenty-four hour interval; the moon disappeared each month at the same time, and women had their menstrual cycles once a month. Now, longer cycles of time could be calculated using other astrological or otherwise phenomena, such as the cycles of seasons or the disappearance of the

1 Though it should be noted that the Radiant One and the Plagued One are very good at masking their own appearance- the Radiant One appears mundane to humans when they are in the midst of the Plagued One’s followers, and the Plagued One falsely portrays himself as the Radiant One frequently. 2 Hinduism is unique in that it gives nature conscious thought; and since it is conscious and omnipotent, it must be omniscient as well (by their logic). Also, Vishnu himself is a very interesting god, mixing all three prime gods together as one.

constellation Arcturus during the winter months. Even longer than that, I have no idea- some ancient cultures could tell time in several years and use calculations to predict events. Only in recent years, with the advent of Christianity, Islam, and

Atheism has time been portrayed as a ‘linear process,’ a forward march independent of past events1.

Now, I feel as though I must accommodate the atheists- Nature, The Radiant

One, and the Plagued One may very well be acknowledged as ‘metaphors’ for underlying currents that influence human behavior, and following the ideals of the

Radiant One causes progress, while the Plagued One causes regression. They don’t necessarily need to be ephemeral entities that influence the world; just call them ways of thinking, in broad categories. For example, ‘Spenta Mainyu’ in

Zoroastrianism literally means ‘right thought,’ and ‘Angra Mainyu’ is ‘wrong thought2,’ and all of the angels and demons contained under the umbrellas of right and wrong thought were methods of right or wrong thought, respectively.

Consider the Radiant One akin to right thought, and the Plagued One akin to wrong thought.

1 Some claim that Zoroastrianism also taught time as linear, due to individual judgment and choice; however, the ideas of choice and cyclical time do not necessarily need to be in conflict, so long as exact events do not repeat themselves exactly the same way every time a cycle comes. 2 ‘Mainyu’ probably means ‘Spirit’ instead of thought, but I find ‘thought’ a more apt translation.

I:VIII:I- The Empty One

“Science reckons many prophets, but there is not even a promise of a messiah.”

–Thomas Huxley

There is one non-deity figure important in the Urreligious perception of reality, and I refer to him as the Empty One, and unlike the other figures of the

Urreligion it isn’t possible to take him as a metaphor (that I can see, anyway).

The Empty One is the savior (or saviors- only one at a time as reckoned by prophecy, however) that the Radiant One sends to guide man away from the

Plagued One, as people have a natural tendency to gravitate towards his deceptions. The Empty One is what Zoroastrians call Saoshyant, what the Hindu call Kalki, and what the Buddhists call Maitreya. I refer to him as ‘empty’ because he is not human- he may appear human, he may have a heart and organs that function like a human, but he has no soul. He is already dead, and yet he lives.

He is a god, yet he is a man. He is, for all intents and purposes, the divine equivalent of a hand puppet for the Radiant One. While various religions argue that their prophet fits this description, none of them measure up, because the one and only Empty One will leave no suffering in his wake. There is no religion that can make such audacious claims. The true Empty One will be the harbinger of an apocalypse (literal translation: unveiling), in which all are brought to justice; the unjust will die, and the just shall flourish as it should be. The concept of the

Empty One is absent in a few religions, such as ones like the Nahua or Norse

religions that teach the end of the earth will be something that mankind cannot stop, a battle between the gods. Conversely, in religions that teach that man’s choices are infinitely important, the Empty One is given much more laud.

One particular religion called Bahá'í centers their entire religion around the premise that their prophet, Bahá'u'lláh, is indeed the Empty One as referred to in

Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Zoroastrian and Buddhist traditions. However, I digress- ‘the’ Bahá’u’lláh just repackages Islam with bits of Buddhism and

Hinduism, or so it seems to me.

Perhaps the number-one indication of a cultist (or religious leader at all, for that matter) is a claim to be the Empty One, and perhaps more so if it is the ‘final prophet’ or something of such a caliber. For example, a man by the name of

Claude Vorilhon started a petty little UFO cult in France called Raëlism, and in his book Le Maitraya (The Maitreya) he claims to be Maitreya Buddha. Over the past two-thousand years, practically all religions have been started by men with such audacious claims to divine nature (that turn out to obviously not be true) starting with Jesus himself claiming that he was the Son of God, and degenerating further by Muhammad asserting that he was Allah’s ‘Final Prophet,’ and perhaps every madman with delusions of grandeur asserting the same thing-

“I am god’s final prophet, and if you obey my words to the letter it will bring paradise, and if people refuse to listen then they are heathens/infidels/ suppressive personalities.” Here’s the thing- the Empty One does not need every

single human to listen, for his word will be so obviously and unequivocally true that it will spread like wildfire to every corner of the world immediately.

I:VIII - American-Spawned Cults

“A cult is a religion with no political power.”

-Tom Wolfe

These next practices do not even deserve the easily achievable title of ‘religion’ granted to other practices. These cults are a shame upon this nation of mine, an eternal black mark, and they can congeal only here, where our free-market ideals have bled so far into other categories, even into our religious practices.

Here, I place Scientology, Kaballah, Mormonism, and Jehovah’s Witness.

I do not even consider Scientology a legitimate religion1. I have no idea why anyone believes such lies, either. L. Ron Hubbard, the Science Fiction writer, started Scientology a short while ago with the book Dianetics. Not even he believed the crap he spouted. He has been quoted as saying “I know the easiest way to make money. Start a religion.” He insults his own religion, and yet people still follow him. I believe that the United States has a law against things like this- they’re called pyramid schemes. The lower ones on the ladder pay exorbitant amounts to learn tiny lies. Perhaps they believe that the people that are above them are genuinely interested in their well-being. Perhaps they are not intelligent

1 Because it is insane. Also, Scientology does not follow the preset paths of religion- monotheism in the desert, polytheism near water, and ‘other’ in the mountains. I would call it a bizarre and blatantly false hypothesis, if anything. It doesn’t even fit in the concept of any kind of ‘-theism,’ as to my knowledge.

enough to recognize that not every investment yields return. Perhaps they are too trusting of these slick, manipulative puppet masters. Here, let me save you enough money to buy yourself a vacation home. Maybe even a private island, should the rates increase.

In a galaxy far, far away, in a distant past, there was a great conglomerate of alien cultures, lead by one called Xenu. He arrested those he disliked, took them to earth, and blew them up with a series of tactical hydrogen bombs. He trapped the souls which rose from the earth, made them watch a brainwashing cinematic for thirty six days, and then made them attach themselves to the dumb primitives roaming the earth. That’s the story of why we’re conscious (4).

I’ve heard tell that the way Scientology works is through some kind of shame/pride principle; that a member is given tests that show that they are horribly depressed without exception (if you’re considering joining Scientology, then you really are pretty badly off) and the Scientologists say they can ‘cure’ them for a slight fee. Then, they find out exactly what kind of crap this cult spews and they’re too ashamed to leave; they figure there must be more to it than what they (or earlier, I) just told them. So, they keep paying to find the point where it

‘all comes together’ but it never does. My description above is about as good as it gets.

I consider Scientology to be benign, and despite just how ravenously fiction is referred to as fact and truth and lies muddled together, they are an insignificance, and they always will be. At least many of the other religions know where to draw the line, such as putting at least the slightest amount of truth in their crock, but apparently Hubbard thought he was better. However, as it turns out, he wasn’t.

A few years ago, I would have been rather frightened of having my book censored by the Church of Scientology and its lawsuits. However, thanks to the capriciously benevolent force of a group of internet users known collectively as

‘Anonymous,’ Scientology has lost practically all control of any kind of internet- based indoctrination or information censorship. Even if the Church of Scientology could successfully suppress my words against them, all it takes is one anonymous posting to fill in the gaps. I feel it necessary to thank the faceless users who compose the conglomerate of Anonymous for furthering the ideals of free knowledge and, I assume, justice. This particular method of thinking that you deserve free knowledge automatically labels a person as a Suppressive Person, or SP in Scientolo-babble.

Now, Kaballah is practically to Judaism what Scientology is to Christianity. As I understand the matter, Kaballah is an ancient form of Jewish Mysticism, which

I’m sure must thrill the Jews, what with it being made known that they actually used to believe such crap (even though it was three thousand years ago). Still, parts of it are entirely fabricated within the last century, and it really is nothing

more than a cult for famous people in Hollywood and the fools who follow them, much to the ire of Hasidic Jews (who aren’t too thrilled with ‘hocus-pocus’

Judaism).

Mormonism was started by a fellow by the name of Joseph Smith in the mid

1800s. (His name was Joe Smith. If my name was that plain, I would probably take to trying to make history in any way possible, as well.) Now, the story goes that Joseph Smith was sleeping, and he was visited by an angel- but this wasn’t just any angel. No, it was an Indian! Yeah, an Indian angel!

So, anyway, this magical Indian angel told good ol’ Joseph Smith all kinds of fun stuff, among other things where two tablets of gold were buried that had ‘the words of god’ written on them. However, Joe had been naughty, and the angel wouldn’t let him open the box in which the tablets were kept for exactly four years until after he had found them. So, Joe took them into town, and instead of translating them, he put them in a chest and locked it. He then invited all the townsfolk over to look at it- the chest. Not the tablets. The chest. He wouldn’t let them look at the tablets, for whatever reason.

Eventually, he began to translate the tablets (which he still wouldn’t let anyone see), which he declared were written in Egyptian. He also put them inside a hat, and ‘dictated’ them to a friend of his, Martin Harris.

Turns out Martin was a bit of a scatterbrain; he lost the translation. Martin went back to Joe, and told him that he had lost the translations, but he said it was fine because Joe still had the same tablets… right?

Joe decided to read from a different tablet, in spite to those who stole his original translation. So, it came out similar in nature, but very different in syntax and word choice. How odd.

So, after he had read from them a second time, people kept asking to see the tablets (and hilarity ensues). He told them that his Indian angel buddy had taken them back into his care, and that he was the tablets’ new keeper.

The angel returned the tablets back to him shortly afterward, but still, nobody had seen them except Smith. Several people recall him doing his translations in the hat without retrieving the tablets from wherever he said he had hidden them.

Hmm…

Eventually, Smith went off and hid the tablets at the same place he claims he found them, a hill called Cumorah in New York. There are several different accounts of what happened there- some say that Smith went in alone, and some say he went in with several other early Mormon leaders. Some say he put the tablets in alone, and some say that they are accompanied by a breastplate and a

sword with a hilt of pure gold and a blade of fine steel. You can’t blame that one on mistranslation.

Later in life, Joe came across several other metal tablets and plates in his life that actually have been found. He claims they were ancient. They were proved to have been both made and written in the nineteenth century (by the science team at Brigham Young University, ironically).

It is worth noting that there actually have been authentic ancient volumes written upon metal sheets, but not a single one of them is from America, or even the

Western hemisphere. The native peoples of this hemisphere were sadly devoid of seemingly almost all knowledge of metal-working due to abundance of otherwise viable materials for tools and weapons, such as obsidian.

Across his entire life, Joe and his friends kept on getting kicked out of town. I always loved how the LDS church made it sound like some kind of ‘pilgrimages’ were taking place. Not in the slightest. They were getting kicked around because people were getting tired of their crap. The common man wanted no part of the

Mormon religion whatsoever, and they wanted them out of town as soon as possible.

Even Smith’s death is funny. He was elected mayor of Nauvoo, Illinois, and he did all kinds of incredibly stupid things (you’d figure his Indian angel would give

him some sense). He had up to thirty wives (twenty seven have been confirmed), he beat his first wife, a council of his creation ordained him King of the Kingdom of God, he declared that his area of domain was a ‘nation’ which he seriously believed was official (he sent ambassadors to foreign countries, my native Texas among them).

Smith had a disagreement with a follower of his about polygamy (guess which side he was on), and that follower retaliated by founding an expository newspaper. Smith responded by enacting corrupt ‘libel laws’ (it’s ironic, because everything his follower said in the paper was completely true) in his city and destroying the newspaper. The governor of Illinois ordered Smith to stand trial for destroying private property, and (surprise!) he ran, like a coward. However, his battered wife convinced him to return and stand trial.

Surprisingly enough, when Smith was taken outside of his little bubble of jackassery and idiocy, he was killed almost immediately. It was a Carthage jail, and they were kept in a small cage on the second story. As night fell the very first night, a group of assassins converged upon the jail. Surprise again, he tried to jump out of a window and leave his companions (among them his own brother) to die (and he did indeed die).Unfortunately, one of the townsfolk fired off either an accurate or lucky shot, and it hit him in the leg. Smith survived the jump, but apparently God wasn’t able to heal his leg wound before the assassins casually made their way downstairs and into the street, and they finished him off. They

soon departed, as they knew that Joe Smith’s followers would become violent and kill them if they stayed. The LDS Church says that’s malarkey, but I guess we’ll never know because the townsfolk who shot Smith weren’t dumb enough to stick around to find out.

I love how the Mormons made it sound like martyrdom. What they don’t mention is that Joe Smith and his brother had smuggled pistols into the jail, and despite the fact that they both fired several shots, they didn’t kill or seriously wound a single assassin (even though he hit one of them in the face, he lived and was just fine). I can imagine if any of the townsfolk were left to talk about it, they would say that Joe Smith begged for his life, got on his knees, and renounced his own lie of a religion before they shot him. That seems reasonable, given his cowardly conduct repeatedly in only the few short months before this procession of events

(5).

It really is sick to read the sympathizers accounts of what happened to Joseph

Smith. They are so blind to reason. I seem to recall a Mormon historian referring to Joseph Smith having a pistol in the jail as a ‘mystery that may never be solved’

(because he was so holy and good, don’t you know). I don’t know why more objective people have chronicled the story of Mormonism. Maybe they had the same problem I did of continually crying from laughing so hard. A recurring thought I had was “You’ve got to be kidding me! People actually believe this? If I told this to a reasonable five year-old he’d call me a liar!” Perhaps it is because it

is so laughable, even from the dumbest of outside perspectives, nobody has bothered to keep track of it. At every step, there are historical falsehoods, lies, polygamy, anachronisms, wife beating, etcetera. I really have no idea how anyone could be so stupid as to believe this crap. If there is anything to justify cynicism, it’s this: People believe things like these worthless and baseless cults that have formed in this country.

So, then we get to Jehovah’s Witness. These people constantly bother you while you’re eating or doing something important, ringing your doorbell, getting up in your face, saying : “Do you know Jesus? Oh, you’re a Christian? How would you like to know our Jesus?”

As I understand through this ‘Watchtower’ pamphlet that they pass out, the end is perpetually nigh. So, upon further research, I have learned that in the beginning days of the church they actually did set dates for the Armageddon1 (they found one date by just adding 3,000 to a year when something happened in the Bible) and they are utterly without any evidence. For example, they didn’t know that there was no ‘Year Zero’ and had to recalculate because of a basic logical error.

They always seem to have made their calculations as closely as possible, because ‘The End is Nigh,’ which I may remind you is a phrase that has been uttered for one-hundred and fifty years (at least).

1 Unsurprisingly, the creator of Jehovah’s Witness (back then called the Bible Scholars) was a Millerite- known for following a pastor who predicted the apocalypse using ‘bible math’ and subsequently furthering the idea that Christians are doom-saying, smoke-and-hellfire kind of people. Surprise again, he was perpetually wrong, just like the creator of Jehovah’s Witness.

Jehovah’s Witnesses have a rather silly history (although not quite as absurd as

Mormonism or Scientology, the actual facts are quite legitimate) and subsequently silly doctrines such as: Blood transfusions are grounds for expulsion, military service is wrong, wearing a Cross around your neck is like wearing a bullet that killed someone1, prayer should be used instead of medication, participating in governmental elections is the work of the devil, and so on.

They, among the other branches of Christianity, are known very well for their extreme sense of self-righteousness (they even beat out the born-again Baptists and Church of Christ). They believe that they are the only ‘true church’ and all other churches are the work of the devil. They believe that they are god’s ‘chosen church’ and they will be the ones who rule the earth once Armageddon rolls around, and the rest of us ‘heathen folk’ will have to serve them for one-thousand years to prove something. They believe that they are the only ones who are fit for heaven.

Thus concludes my study and subsequent slander of the cults that my country has spawned. So, now that this ultimate practice of stupidity is done with, we move on to what some consider the ultimate practice of reason: atheism.

1 And yet, they say that Jesus died on an upright stake, not a cross. So then, why not wear a Cross if Jesus didn’t die on it? Perhaps they are indeed the historically accurate ones among Christianity, and they know that many great leaders were crucified before and after Jesus. Perhaps it’s a bit of a stretch to say that they actually have some kind of ‘desire to learn about secular history.’

I:IX- Atheism

“When one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity. When many

people suffer from a delusion it is called religion.”

-Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

In this day and age, atheism is used as a misnomer, generally meant to mean

‘irreligious’ as opposed to actual atheism. Buddhism is atheistic, but is by no means irreligious. Modern atheists look at the evils that religion has spawned and shake their heads- instead of trying to do something constructive, they step out of the ring of religion and watch as the ones still left pummel the crap out of each other, leaving bloodied corpses, which I am sure the atheists find very droll.

It does bother me, however, that atheists are so quick to point out the problems that religion has caused- generally, they are quite dumbfounded when the reply comes “So, what are you doing about it? Your bitching certainly isn’t making anything better.” So, perhaps they will give the age-old excuse of ‘the world would be better if we were all atheist.’ The Christians and Muslims say the same thing. Look how that turned out. That’s called the ‘Dark Ages.’ The Muslim one isn’t over yet.

Perhaps we would be more productive if Christians didn’t spend an hour in church every Sunday morning, if Muslims did not chant their prayers when they

woke from slumber, if Buddhists did not meditate and the Hindu did not read the

Vedas. Perhaps it would be, but in all reality that is a bleak future where all we do is rot in the ground when we die, and our lives have very little meaning in the grand scheme of things. Atheism can be a good thing when properly applied, but like most folks, a good bit of atheists are stupid and do it out of spite instead of reason. They don’t follow it out of a love for their fellow man- they do it out of a hatred for the divine. The ultimate end of spiteful atheism is the abasement of humans to tools, useful only for reaching production quotas and revolutions; nothing more.

Atheism, up until a few hundred years ago, was simply a practice out of spite to the ways of the mainstream religion. With the advent of science that disproves almost every religion, atheism has become more a practice of reason and quantification than spite, as it was so very long ago. So, with the advent of scientific atheism, we have three general paths that can be followed- the spiteful atheist, the cowardly atheist, and the reasonable atheist.

Reasonable atheists are generally among the more prominent of the three categories- those such as philosophers, scientists, authors, and so on. There have been hundreds upon hundreds of such individuals, such as Sigmund Freud,

Frederich Nietzsche, Diderot, Karl Marx, Stephen Hawking… I could go on.

Darwin, if you know your history, wrote the book ‘The Origin of Species’ and founded the modern theory of evolution, which has been proven true countless times since it was discovered in the 19th century. Theists like to misinterpret one of Darwin’s quotes upon his death bed in order to twist it into him disproving his own theory. This is one of approximately twenty quotes that theists use to attempt to disprove science, and among those gifted with reason this practice is called ‘quote mining.’ Darwin was a scientist until his death, and his discoveries rank among the most profound in history, despite what religious fanatics may say.

Now, I’ve heard much bandying about of ideas as to whether or not Darwin was an atheist. Well, let me put it this way; does that really matter? If you make a discovery that practically disproves your own religion and do not destroy it or tamper with it, your religion does not interfere with progress whatsoever. Who knows, perhaps Darwin was a Christian at one point but became de-sensitized to religion because of his various observations as a scientist. It is not plainly laid out in any of his writings to my knowledge, so I suppose this entry in the book of religious preference is one to be left empty for the moment.

Many modern-day atheists (at least the prominent ones) seem to be driven by an urge just to destroy religion instead of finding a practical solution. I find the simple destruction of religion impractical. As it has been shown and proven time and time again, when you destroy an age-old institution and make no attempt to

replace it with something equally as valid, it creates a power vacuum which will spark conflict in order to determine who gets to fill the void with their ideas, and often their ideas are just as or even more harmful than their predecessors.

Then again, it’s not likely it will even come to that. The voluntarily irreligious sector of the population is relatively miniscule compared to the religious sector, and while the atheists may have a higher concentration of the population in places such as university professorship and scientific research, their impact is still somewhat minimized by the indoctrination practiced by religious folk, which is a force to be reckoned with, indeed. Indoctrination is a very hard thing to break in an individual, but when that barrier is removed, it is (as a good friend1 of mine whose faith I broke said): “So beautiful…”

1 Said good friend is probably the most vehement atheist that I know, and has contributed greatly to my perspectives upon atheism as a whole. That does not necessarily amount to extrapolating the whole from a single individual, mind you. The funny thing is that he was your run of the mill bible-thumper before I happened upon him. Admittedly, he was on the path to atheism, I simply delivered the killing blow to his faith. He knows these things. He is even glad and thankful that I broke him of what he now considers ‘falsehood.’

Book II- History of Religion

From the Cro-Magnon all the way to modern pig-headedness, watch our race devolve like magic!

“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

-George Santayana

Now, I understand that history is probably not the most exciting thing on the planet, believe me. But, like I said earlier, this is all essential to the bigger picture

I’m painting.

This particular edition of history might differ a bit from the text books. However, in contrast to text books, I will not bore you with esoteric facts that you will never remember or make any difference like “Native American civilization started making primitive spear heads to hunt giant buffalo in 12,000 B.C.” So, it’s a lot quicker, but not in particular chronological order. I may digress with conventional portrayals of history. I may place greater importance on certain issues than other historians do. Just remember- it’s your choice who you want to believe.

My digressions upon historical dates with the experts in archaeology, linguistics or dating have a premise, that premise being that sometimes the dating of documents and events is based upon fallacious logic.

For example, one hot topic among the intellectual community is the dating of the

Rig Veda and subsequent Puranas, Gitas, and other holy documents of

Hinduism. For example, let’s say we have two Puranas- the ‘Alpha’ and ‘Beta’

Puranas. Alpha is older than Beta, as shown by the development of ideas from

Alpha in Beta and direct references to Alpha in Beta. Herein lies the fallacy; many historians date Alpha to the date when Beta was actually written, because the reference in Beta is the first ‘reinforcement’ of the inference that Alpha actually was written first. Beta is subsequently dated to its reference in Gamma,

Gamma is dated to the authoring of Delta, and so on. As a true historical example, the Bhagavata Purana asserts that it was composed (composed- not written) when Krishna died, and it gives 3102 BCE as the date. The Bhagavata

Purana also makes (extended) reference to the Sarasvati River as a ‘great river,’ and despite the fact that the Sarasvati River completely dried up somewhere around 2000 BCE, many people date the Bhagavata Purana to some point in the

Common Era. You can see that there certainly is a logical problem here.

Furthermore, if the Hindu were indeed deceiving by throwing in that little bit of information to reinforce their ‘lie,’ why didn’t they do it more often? The Bhagavad

Gita, a book that is supposedly a recorded conversation between Krishna and a man named Arjuna, contains no such references. The Bhagavad Gita contains no evidence beyond simple assertion that the events contained within actually happened when the composer said they did. However, he could have thrown in the trick from the Bhagavata Purana of referencing the Sarasvati River and have it make complete historical sense. But he didn’t. Funny, that.

For overlooking such obvious fallacies in reason, I don’t put much stock in traditional portrayals of history. I put things when and where they make sense to me, and surprisingly enough I generally have a historian who agrees.

II:I- In The Beginning…

“History is the lie commonly agreed upon.”

-Voltaire

Up until a few thousand years ago, a small amount of time in the grand scheme of things, we humans had no time for religion. It was simple survival that consumed our hours. I have no real idea of how old our race is- genetic evidence points to 200,000 (though possibly as many as 300,000) years as our current

Homosapien incarnation. Assuming that the evidence is correct and we only have about 2,500 years of well-chronicled history, that means that we have reliable history pertaining to 1/80th of (current) human history. To put this in context, the very first (preserved) historical depiction of any god is a Sumerian

(area, not civilization) fertility goddess from about 20,000 years ago- still within

1/10th of our current existence as humans.

During this two-hundred thousand year timeframe, the first crude ritualistic burials and cremations were performed by Neanderthals. History books teach that this is the beginning of religion. I have a somewhat different take upon the issue. I believe that burials were first conducted in order to conceal the stench of rotting flesh, and cremation disposed of a body entirely. In the same vein of thought, it was perhaps troubling for people to see dead bodies decompose and end up maggot-ridden and so on, and burying a dead person provided relief from these

potentially scarring experiences. Burial and cremation seem to be the only way to get rid of a stinking corpse back then, short of cannibalism (which certain groups practiced anyway). After generations, burying the dead became tradition, and they made more elaborate burials for those of higher worth- great hunters, religious leaders, elders, and what have you. So the idea of burial spread, thus raising the question of what happens after death. The original theory from

Sumeria is that when they died, they went to a joyless place beneath the crust of the Earth, where they wandered endlessly and purposelessly. I suppose that it is a logically sound assumption, considering that being buried would be quite dull for the dead.

Our pagan ancestors1 lived a life free of responsibility or care- hunt for food, eat until you are full, drink until you are quenched, and if your shelter still stands, you can do whatever you want to pass the time. When someone dies, you bury them, and think upon it no further. No introspection, no quandaries about the afterlife.

Should you choose to have a family, you would have to split your kills and findings with them, but apart from that, nobody really depended upon one another.

Then, one day, a nomadic tribe walked across land that they had one hunted across, looking at the new and unfamiliar plant life that had sprung forth while they were away, and remembering back, noticing that the plants coincided with

1 The Hebrew may digress, but their religion is fairly short-lived in the scope of things, and before their monotheistic god came around, they were pagan, most likely tribalistic, as well.

the places where the animal droppings and seeds had landed. From that, the plants had grown, and people suddenly realized that they could grow their own food, and nomadic hunting was not necessary any more- thus, the Neolithic

Revolution. So, people settled down in cities and culture as we know it was first forged. In the beginning, there were no real ‘nations’ or ‘states’ until fighting broke out between different cities, which I surmise was the work of single individuals.

Even back in these times, the religious figures knew that they could use their promises of salvation to manipulate the masses, thus plunging our species, which had known only relative peace before, into wars at the whim of a theocratic government. Unfortunately for them, sometimes their gods did not deliver a battle plan or particular tactical prowess to them, so they would abdicate to a more militaristic leader for the duration of the war. However, sometimes the military leader liked the power, and assumed the role of the new theocrat. So, the people followed the new leader, without ever having a second thought about what it would have been like if the old theocrat had stayed in power.

While archaeologists have found armor and weapons from this time all around the world, the Indus Valley civilization (Indian subcontinent) appears to be devoid of them. The Vedas tells of various invading parties, but apparently they all either left or assimilated into the culture set in place. Perhaps this accounts for the

rather docile and passive way of handling issues that the Hindu people have developed- go with what works, as they say.

Meanwhile, in Sumeria the first laws were born- Hammurabi’s Code. The great king Hammurabi declared that for every wrong done to you, you may take revenge of an equal amount upon the wrongdoer. Of course, it was very vague and biased- if a man killed one of your slaves, you could lash him a few times, but that was about it. If that same man killed someone of a high place in society, he and his entire family were put to death. Hell, a slave slapping his master earned him the death penalty. “An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth” it is called today.

Of course, modern record of such law would not be possible, were it not for another invention of the Sumerians: writing. Their language of pictographs was called Cuneiform, and serves to record many things of the ancient world, such as the oldest known legend ever composed- The Epic of Gilgamesh1. There are, indeed, older texts from Egypt written in their style of Hieroglyphics, but these pertain more to rites and rituals conducted to guide a pharaoh/priest to their proper afterlife.

I’m sure that something just as fascinating was occurring in the Western

Hemisphere, but thanks to our valiant and righteous expeditionary force, we have

1 If you like a more epic-sounding title, it was originally titled “He Who Saw the Deep” or “Surpassing All Other Kings.”

no idea what it was. We can piece together what was happening through the wonders of modern science, though. A single race of undetermined origin had settled the continent, and they scattered across the two continents, from tip to tip.

Eventually, as time went on, they all developed distinct cultures, features, religions, languages, and other things to separate them from their neighbors. I believe we call this father race the ‘Clovis’ people, named after Blackwater Draw, which was near a town called Clovis, not too far from where I currently write this.

I have been to Clovis and seen Blackwater Draw- on the surface, it seemed quite unremarkable, but that was before I knew what had lain hidden there so many years ago.

Anyway, I’ve heard tell that all native cultures to the Americas are descended from the Clovis people. I’ve also heard that there were several different migrant groups, and that the Clovis were not the first. Either way, we lack documentation and folklore, so I suppose here’s a page in history destined to remain blank for all eternity.

However, from this time period is a pagan religion that is very old indeed, with no real ‘start date’ much like Hinduism. This religion was the practice of the

Egyptians, called Kemetism1. The Egyptians actually named their gods- Ra is the

God of the sun, Isis the Goddess of magic and the Nile, Ptah the God of creation,

Anubis the God of judgment. Now, I believe the first documentation of actual

1 It’s also acceptable to just call it ‘Egyptian,’ since the only two other (major) recorded religions in the area are Christianity and Islam.

gods of an entire nation was those of Egyptians1. Thanks to hieroglyphics and thousands of years of study, we can actually tell what they believed about the afterlife. Hurrah for literacy.

The Egyptians believed that there was a life after this one, and your status in said life depended upon the power that you commanded in this one. Thus, the pharaohs, priests, and other important religious figures got big, extravagant burials. Less important people got a hole in the ground and maybe some base wrappings. However, the great and powerful pharaohs got gigantic pyramids, filled with tunnels, false ends, lots and lots of loot, and a sarcophagus, which held a very well embalmed, well preserved pharaoh, who was less a few organs due to the mummification process.

Their great and powerful gods demanded blood, toil, and gigantic geometric monuments. Several pyramids were built, along with more puzzling monuments, like the Sphinx, which I still, to this day, fail to see the purpose of (let’s chalk it up to ‘fearful tribute’). To take on projects of such a size, the Egyptians ‘brought in some help’. Thus, from the land of Canaan come the Egyptian slaves, whom we later call the Hebrew people.

Even the origin of the Hebrew is a debate- people have said every region from the jungles south of Egypt to Sumeria is where the Egyptian slaves came from. In

1 I have heard tell that Kemetism is as old as 12,000 years, which means that it could very well be older than Hinduism. Of course, that depends on several factors. Let’s hope modern archaeology can answer this question soon.

the Middle East region, they classified certain people as ‘Habiru’ which bears a striking similarity to ‘Hebrew,’ and was used to describe outcasts of society who had banded together; proto-gypsies, so to speak. They were not of similar ancestry, nor did they even speak a unified language. The likeliness of them worshipping a unified god is also a negligible chance. Needless to say, their only bond was being nomadic. I believe that the Hebrew people were descended from an enslaved group of Habiru, whose band and subsequent tribal divisions may or may not have been started by a man named Abraham.

They may not have been related, but the chances of the Hebrew people being any color other than a darkish brown is folly. Many people associate biblical history with a whitish Hebrew race, and even portray Jesus and other important

Hebrew figures to be Caucasian, instead of a more likely olive-colored complexion with Middle-Eastern features.

As much as I doubt the Hebrew were related in any way, their toil must have created some kind of familial bond through servitude. Thus, they began to hate the gods which they unwillingly served, so they invented their own god, their own stories, and their own system of beliefs. They said ‘Hey, our captors have several gods. Let’s have just one. Let’s put him in charge of all existence. He’s got a plan. I’m sure that our enslavement is just some kind of test, or something.’

Now comes perhaps one of the most crippling historical questions to Abrahamic

Monotheism- why did Moses lead the Hebrew out of Israel? The Bible says the paranoid pharaoh ordered all Hebrew boys to be executed for some unstated reason, and Moses’ mother set him upon the Nile in a basket and it ‘somehow’ ended up at the royal palace, and the princess ‘somehow’ was taking a bath at the exact time the basket came in, and that princess ‘somehow’ decided to care for a mysterious river baby that looked to be of low birth, in all likeliness.

Well, as many holes as that story has in it, I’d like to point out the biggest one- why the hell would the pharaoh execute the male children of his slaves? He needed them for labor. Despite any modern feminist assertions, nobody can argue that a man is considerably physically stronger than a woman typically and therefore is more useful for slave labor. If he actually had some pent-up hatred for the Hebrew, he would have ordered the women executed as well, and if he just wanted to save food and other supplies he would have executed only the women. Executing male slaves makes absolutely no sense in this scenario.

Sigmund Freud wrote a book about the various discrepancies in the Biblical story of Moses, and he aptly named it Moses and Monotheism. In it, he asserts that in all likeliness Moses was not a Hebrew at all, and was instead an Egyptian priest who had been raised to take his father’s trade. However (speculative departure alert), instead of traditional Egyptian religion, he probably grew up with a bizarre mix of Kemetism and Atenism put into his head, a state cult instituted by the

pharaoh Amenhotep IV. The timeline of these events and the teachings of

Judaism line up very startlingly with Freud’s theory- Atenism is perhaps the first monotheistic religion (only competition being Zoroastrianism). Moses’ father probably taught him the old stories of Kemetism as well, such as a very odd one that shows up in the very first story in the Bible- Ptah speaks creation into existence, and it was the first documented religion to teach creation ex nihilio

(creation from nothing) by means of speech.

Amenhotep is always shown as being a rather disgusting looking individual, along with practically all the individuals around him being caught in his crossfire, including but not limited to his father, his wife and his children. Instead of respectful imagery of the big, muscular, athletic pharaoh, Amenhotep is often portrayed as a bloated individual with abnormally long fingers, a long face and man-breasts. His wife Nefertiti is sometimes shown disrespectfully in her old age, wrinkled and deflated from child-bearing. His father is shown as being rather fat, and many of Amenhotep’s children are given the exact same disrespect as he was. I can’t help but feel this is somehow related to how his life and cult were perceived.

However, after Amenhotep’s death, his cult crumbled immediately and all of the priests that preached his word were sent into exile by a subsequent pharaoh, which would, yet again, seem to line up with the events described in the Bible. At this time, Moses was likely not of mature age and had to go with his father into

his exile. He spent an indeterminate amount of time in exile, and eventually he returned to Egypt due to some unknown urge and implored the current pharaoh1 to turn the Hebrew over to him. When the pharaoh refused, Moses performed a series of parlor trick quality magic that the current royal priests seemed to be very knowledgeable about and thus could accurately counter, sending Moses off hot and fuming, while the priests pointed and laughed at him for trying to beat him at their own game that they were practicing while Moses was off in exile.

After trying several more tricks, Moses had the wonderful idea of starting rebellions among the Hebrew slaves and the Egyptians simply shook their heads and said ‘Silly Jews. Let them have their fun.’ At least, that is, until they went from house to house and killed the firstborn son of every Egyptian family, and marked the homes of the Jews with blood so that the enraged mobs of nighttime assassins would pass over them- thus, the Passover. The Bible says that the

‘angel of death’ was the culprit to blame here, but from a secular point of view, the slaughter of the firstborns of the Egyptians was only beneficial and feasible to the Hebrew. The Egyptians finally said ‘Oh crap. We screwed up big time.

Keeping them here isn’t worth the trouble. Let’s go get some new slaves.’ Thusly, they kicked the Hebrew out of Egypt2, and sent them away to wander whilst they

1 Tradition holds that Ramses II (or Ozymandias) was the pharaoh who set the Hebrew free, but there is no real evidence for such a claim. The Exodus of the Hebrew has yet to be accurately pinpointed within a century, much less to the reign of a particular pharaoh. 2 According to the Bible, there were six-hundred thousand adult male Jews (odd, considering that the average Hebrew probably did not know how to count past ten at that point, much less six- hundred thousand), which if the number is tripled and then some to account for wives and children, that’s two million Hebrew slaves, ringing in at about 6% of the world’s total population at the time. That would be like all of the United States of America suddenly getting up and leaving, in modern terms. Needless to say, this theory is logically absurd. Even six-hundred thousand is

poked around for some new slaves to help them build their colossal monuments.

Indeed, they got some fresh new ones, ones whom they observed more closely for signs of dissent, or worse- that damnable monotheism that filled the Hebrew with such rage. It is perhaps the incident incited by this monotheism itself that caused all subsequent records of pharaoh Amenhotep IV to be referred to as ‘the enemy.’

From the time of wandering comes the idea of a ‘promised land.’ The Hebrew people did not want to think themselves wandering purposelessly, so they told a tale of how God promised them a certain strip of land which they would one day find. In reality, they were looking for any place where they could be safe and have a somewhat tolerable existence. Of course, they pissed off several people along the way. The ancient Arabs, I can imagine, were quite irked by a group of nomadic monotheists meandering around, drinking their water, fertilizing their fields without permission (to use a euphemism), and eating their food. They told their offspring of the people who trespassed upon the sacred land of the gods, which the strangers called ‘idols’ and ‘false.’ They taught their children to hate.

They in turn taught their children to hate, on and on, until the state the world is in today, with every country around Israel waiting for a moment when they will be vulnerable. Then, they will strike, and bring honor to their ancestors, and they will be utterly unaware of it.

too large a number to support in the desert for forty years (unless they resorted to cannibalism). Even if the number was accurate, that means that Judaism went from one man to two-million in less than half a milennium, which I believe I don’t need to explain to you, is absurd.

The Hebrew people did eventually find an acceptable place to settle down

(perhaps it was their ancestral home, but then again, who could remember that far back?), and it was just great. That is, except for the previous residents, who they dispatched quite cleanly, which, I believe, is the first example of genocide. It would be more atrocious, but from what we know there were a very small amount of them. There were probably only a few scattered towns, likely less than a million people in total. The Bible describes the residents as being absolutely gigantic, and without mortal parallel. This would make sense; it is a common trick in the history books to make your foe look more daunting to make your victory over them seem that much more spectacular. Another example of this is the campaign of Hannibal.

During this time that the Jewish people were having their shenanigans in the

Middle East, there rose great men from the belly of Greece: Pythagoras,

Aristotle, Socrates, Plato, Homer, Hippocrates, Herodotus, Archimedes, and so many others. They laid the foundation for what we believe today, and some of their ideas from multiple millennia ago stand true still today. Aristotle, for example, said that one day men would move beyond the Earth. Surely enough, we have launched manned expeditions into space, and now sending astronauts up is a ‘ho-hum’ procedure. They were ‘heathen polytheists,’ and yet so very intelligent. While these heathens were discussing metaphysics and calculating

dimensions for architecture, our blue and green marble’s ‘chosen race’ had basic irrigation and primitive weapons.1

The blind poet Homer told a staggering multitude of stories on a variety of subjects, but everyone remembers the Iliad and the Odyssey as his great works.

I have heard that he lived around approximately 850 BC, due to approximations by other folks, namely Herodotus, the historian to whom we owe much of our knowledge of ancient times. Homer, a blind Greek, found a way to make a living entertaining with stories. Perhaps people weren’t that generous back then, or the spirit of Apollo moved him to expand in the sense of poetry and literature. He has a great deal of poems and stories attributed to him, but he is generally known only for the Iliad and Odyssey.

Herodotus, on the other hand, is not such a respected figure. He is called both a historian and a liar. Further investigations into his reports do seem to give off the impression that every inaccuracy in his historical documents was, to the best of his knowledge, true. Either that, or biased in a very obvious way towards Greece.

Of course, without another method of discovery, we must take his word for what happened before there were other historians, and attempt to remove the bias while still preserving historical accuracy.

1 During this pinnacle of Greek achievement, the Hebrew were enslaved by the Babylonians, and later freed by Cyrus the Great.

All this while that great thinkers were rising from Greece, they separated into city- states- the Athenians were well known for fostering “philosophers and boy lovers”, and Sparta fostered practically nothing but warriors. These city-states pointlessly fought to control each other, with the ultimate end of control of

Greece. Occasionally, when an outside threat reared its head, the Greek city- states would unite and destroy the invader, and they go back to their futile infighting.

As I understand it, democracy as we know it was the product of a revolution in order to remove a pro-Spartan governor appointed the head of Athens. The disgruntled citizens of Athens disliked the authority being concentrated at one point, so they decided to spread the power amongst the common man, so that every man had a small amount of say in political matters.

Athens, a newly-found free-thinking state, fostered several great thinkers- First came Socrates, who taught Plato, who taught Aristotle. From these three men come the basis a good bit of the practices of science, philosophy, and government.

Socrates was the first- the great philosopher, who martyred himself in order to spread the ideals of truth and goodness that were so sparse in the day. It has been said that Socrates intentionally irritated the Athenians because he feared growing old and dying slowly and painfully, and so he argued at his trial before

the citizens of Athens- he would much rather die a quick death by poisonous

Hemlock than live to watch his intellect crumble, and then fade to dust slowly.

What we know today about Socrates was mostly relayed through his greatest disciple, Plato.

Plato, apart from relaying the messages of Socrates, is most famous for his work in the realm of metaphysics. It was he who spoke the word to his fellow Greeks that the world that they formed out of their perceptions was not all that there was.

He called this reality ‘a shadow of the true world.’

Aristotle was the disciple of Plato, and upon hearing the somewhat heretical ideas of metaphysics, formed his own somewhat odd ideas, at the time. From him, we have the five elements- fire, water, earth, air, and ether. (Ether is the one commonly left out, because Aristotle stated it pertained only to celestial things.

The first four were the only ones that concerned us, for the moment anyway.)

From Aristotle we get the idea of ‘luck’ and the method of classifying plants and animals, which is a cornerstone of biology. Also, he is widely attributed with discovering and naming the fields of psychology and logic.

While our other great predecessors were thinking upon things that need no explanation, our Jewish friends were etching out quite a nice niche in the Middle

East. They had also developed a survival instinct like none other. The Hebrew were brutal in battle, taking no captives, breaking the rules of battle- one

particular engagement that I remember is the story of Gideon, who led a small force of men into the enemy camp at night and killed them all while they slept, an unprecedented, albeit underhanded tactic, which caught the ‘honor upon the field of battle’ enemy of Gideon’s completely by surprise. I suppose that midnight slaughter works just as well the second time, pardon the morbid joke. So, Gideon trapped the leader of the ‘barbarians’ that planned to assault his nation, gave his son a great axe, and told him to behead the fool. His son was too afraid, so

Gideon took the axe and did it himself, ridiculing his son while at it. Thanks to this

‘knife in the dark’ tactic, even modern armies keep a night patrol, never letting all the soldiers sleep at once.

The Babylonians, the Assyrians, the Philistines, and so many others attacked the

Jews, and were always horribly surprised by the ferocity with which their soldiers fought. Despite the fact that the Jews were less numerous and poorly equipped

(according to the Bible), they still managed to repel every invasion, humiliate every nation, and cause people from one end of the Old World to the other to scratch their heads in confusion when the news that the Jews had beaten back another superior enemy with a lesser force.

II:II- Before the Common Era

“To remain ignorant of things that happened before you were born is to remain a

child.”

-Cicero

Now, after all was said and done, Jerusalem remained standing, casting its shadow upon the ashes of great civilizations that dared attack those who dwelt within its walls. During this time, Aristotle taught a particularly interesting student-

Alexander the Great. The son of the king of Macedon, he was practically destined to be a great general, a war hero, or something else of a great spectacle. The fact that he studied under such a brilliant man only helped his odds. As assured, Alexander grew up and created a great empire, which spanned the known world (at that time) from Greece to India. The stories they tell of Alexander are awe-inspiring- the various maneuvers that he developed, that he, himself, would ride among his troops and fight the battles with them, in contrast to the other commanders of the time, who would sit back, and if they were losing, shrug and gallop off to some more secure location. I suppose the most fantastic story is the tale of Alexander slaying an elephant and all of those that it carried single-handedly.

This great man, warrior of the eons, did not die a warrior’s death. Historians debate how he died- but it was either Malaria or a treacherous poisoning. I prefer

to think Malaria, seeing as how there were very few that would benefit from such a great man dying.

Then, there was the greatest man to have ever lived- no, not Jesus or

Muhammad- this man lived 258 years prior to Alexander’s conquest of the

Achaemenid Empire in 330 BC, according to his followers, so very long ago. This man was the great prophet, the one who has been credited with the creation of philosophy, intellectual religion, morality, and so many other things. This most influential man who ever lived has many names he is known by, but most remember him by a name that was resurrected by Nietzsche- Zarathustra

Spitama.

Zarathustra’s place of birth is debated- every expert seems to have a different opinion upon the matter. I’ve heard many theories, but I believe he was born in the northeastern regions of Afghanistan. Unlike Buddha or subsequent holy men, much of the documentation of Zarathustra’s teachings has been destroyed by various invasions of hostile forces (or domestic unrest). Several of the parts of the Avesta have been destroyed completely, and they are known only to exist because of the gaps that are left in the surviving books. Surprisingly, this is one religion that the Catholic Church didn’t destroy entirely in the Middle Ages- it was mostly Huns, Muslims, and Alexander the Great who killed Zoroastrians. By the

time the Catholic Church had reached its pinnacle, the religion was already nothing but a whisper among intellectual circles1.

Zarathustra is a historically controversial figure- historians have yet to accurately place him within a century. The estimates range across six thousand years, if you can believe that. Linguistically, the books that Zarathustra himself wrote date back to very wide approximation of 1000 BC. Zoroastrians date him to 600 BC.

Historians have recently cited 1400 BC, but the date is constantly being pushed backward. I do not know- but the very general area of time in which he falls is of import.

Zarathustra laid the foundation for Christianity, Islam and later developments of

Judaism- some say Buddhism, given the how the religions are surprisingly similar in certain aspects. However, I digress- the Buddha was born in Nepal (Northeast

India at the time), and since Zoroastrianism had not yet really spread to India in a big way, the chance of the Buddha having knowledge of Zoroastrianism is rather small; however, not so small to completely discount.

According to Zoroastrian legend, there are several ways that Zarathustra first came across Ahura Mazda and subsequently began teaching his fellow man his holy word that was to later become Zoroastrianism. One states that Zarathustra left his town at age thirty and wandered about in the mountains (most likely the

Hindu Kush if I am correct in the placement of his home) and came down at the

1 Still, the Catholic Church has done nothing to help Zoroastrianism along.

age of forty, and other traditions say that his revelation came at the age of thirty and it wasn’t until he converted a king named Vishtaspa at age forty that his religion really took off, so on and so forth. Regardless, it would seem the ages of thirty and forty are significant times in the life of Zarathustra.

Zarathustra laid the precedents for practically every religious leader that followed him- his teachings were at first shunned, he was constantly at odds with the upper class rulers, and he ended up dying at the hands of the unfaithful, a martyr for his faith.

Several of Jesus’ supposed details of his life are plagiarized directly from the teachings and legends of Zarathustra1. He also created the aspect of the One

God being ‘Good.’ The Jews may claim this, but throughout their books (prior to their exposure to Zoroastrianism) their god is simply portrayed as one that has aligned with them. Jesus later used this idea in the foundation of Christianity. The

Old and New Testament is also a Zoroastrian idea- there is an ‘Older Avesta’ and

‘Younger Avesta.’ The Older (i.e., the Gathas) was written by Zarathustra, and the Younger was written in increments by the Zoroastrian clergy.

The Jews themselves owe quite a bit to Zarathustra- a follower of his, Cyrus the

Great, is the one who freed the Jews from their enslavement in Babylon and

1 The Christians even plagiarized the books chronologically. The later Old Testament books are stolen from Older Avesta, and most of the stories of Jesus in the New Testament are taken from the Younger Avesta. Other sources include: Greek Paganism, Babylonian Paganism, Kemetism, Atenism, Judaism, Hinduism, and Buddhism.

guaranteed their equal treatment in the eyes of the law, which was an absolute first for the Jews. It really blows quite a hole in the ‘Jews did not know about

Zarathustra’ theory1. Also, it blows quite a hole in the story where a Jewish prophet has to go and plead with the king for freedom and equal treatment.

It was in this approximate time that a Greek man by the name of Thales rose in prominence in Greece- he is hailed as the first of the Greek philosophers, and by some as the father of science. Perhaps their claims are true, but I find the former much harder to believe than the latter.

Thales was born in 625 BC, and a surprising amount of the philosophy which he

‘discovered’ was common knowledge among Zoroastrians. He spoke of one all- powerful transcendental force, called Ahura Mazda by Zarathustra. It would perhaps be a bit of a stretch to call him a ‘philosopher’- he was a racist, and a sexist, believing that Greeks were better than outsiders, and men were better than women. He died of dehydration from watching an all-male gymnastic contest. I don’t believe I need to describe to you the particular details of this incident. The most shameful reasonable inference here is the correct one.

As far as science goes, he was factually incorrect about almost everything that he proposed, but it laid the basis for later scientists to question everything around

1 Some may say that Zarathustra stole from the Jews. However, this is not the case, as the Jews were very xenophobic back then and would not openly tell strangers about their religion, their god, or their otherwise ideology. The idea that Zarathustra is the thief here is improbable to the point of absurdity. Not to mention, in certain historical scenarios, the Hebrew were still enslaved in Egypt while Zoroastrianism was spreading.

them. He did propose one thing that was true, however- one of his most basic ideas is that all life came from water. In a sense, it is true, because there is very little on this planet that can survive without some form of water. In another sense, it is proven true yet again, since the first bacteria and single-celled organisms from which we evolved were aquatically based.

He also had rudimentary geometrical skills, which it is rumored he passed on to a young Pythagoras before he died in 546 BC. Thus, it is somewhat justifiable to claim that he is the father of geometry.

I may very well be the first to propose something as absurd as to the effect that

Zarathustra is the reason for everything that we know of philosophy and religion, with the exception of basic Judaism, Paganism and Hinduism, and that he is, in essence, the primal source of knowledge for Western thought and philosophy.

Perhaps I am mad; but when you look at the dates and facts of the matter, does it not seem that way to you, my reader?

“The creator Ahura Mazda spoke to Zarathustra thus: 'O Zarathustra! I have

created no one better than you in the world, and I shall likewise not create one

better after you are gone. You are my chosen one, and I have made this world

apparent on account of you.”

-The Avesta, SD 81:3

Do not mistake my intent- I do not seek to glorify Zarathustra, or promote his religious path. I find his religion to be rather superstitious and rigid- if I recall my readings from the Avesta correctly, you must recite a prayer before you relieve yourself. However, as a man, I do respect the colossal intellect that he must have had to create something as unprecedented as his perspectives into humanity.

Without Zarathustra, this world would be less three prophets- himself, Jesus, and

Muhammad. Without Zarathustra, Jesus would have had very few stories to plagiarize, and the same can be said of Muhammad. Without Zarathustra, the

Jews would have remained slaves to the Babylonians, the Greeks may have never discovered philosophy, Buddha may have never become enlightened, the

Hindu may have never cast off their Rig-Vedic gods in favor of Vishnu, and

Alexander may not have united the world in a mighty empire. I’d say his impact on history qualifies the Zoroastrian assertion that he is the ‘greatest man to ever live.’

Zarathustra’s perspective upon a loving, caring god (as opposed to the

‘explanation of natural forces’ gods, the only type around before he showed up) is an unprecedented idea, and it understandably completely altered the makeup of world religions and the impact of religion on the later development of philosophy, and pretty much every cognitive faculty further on. He is the reason that logic and reason are virtues, that truth is held in such high regard, that society is even somewhat organized.

Still, he had his flaws. Much of the Gathas are simply Zarathustra offering cliché worship (at the time) to Ahura Mazda, but his philosophical spin on it wherein he asks Ahura Mazda what is good instead of cowering and going ‘Yes, sir’ is what makes his work revolutionary. Every man before him feared the gods. He respected them, yet was not afraid to show his curiosity and desire.

Even if you disagree with my perspective upon the matter, you must still admit that this world in which we live would be incredibly different without a man such as Zarathustra, whose has created ripples that continue on even until today, despite the fact that he has been all but forgotten in the pages of history.

But Zarathustra died1, yet another sign that he was but a man, and claimed to be nothing more. Still, after he died, his religion persisted and stayed remarkably free of corruption, due to the circumspect nature of his writings. It spread and spread, and for at least a thousand years it was the strongest religion in the world.

The main empire to accept and spread Zoroastrianism was the Achaemenid

Empire2. Prior to Cyrus the Great’s formation of the Achaemenid Empire, the area which it spanned was controlled by an empire called the Median Empire,

1 Zarathustra’s death, according to legend, occurred when barbarians stormed the temple of Balkh. They murdered him on the altar for preaching the word of Ahura Mazda, because they liked their pagan religion better. Thus, Zarathustra is the first ‘martyred prophet.’ 2 Also called the Persian Empire by certain sources.

100

which seemingly lacks any kind of historical documentation whatsoever. Most of the information about the empire wholly pertains to Cyrus’ efforts to overthrow his grandfather Astyages’ rule of the empire. Much like the Achaemenid Empire, the

Median Empire’s official religion was Zoroastrianism, but other forms of worship were allowed. Very little seems to have changed after Cyrus took the head of government from his grandfather, apart from the name of the empire. His particular area of dominion was actually a state which paid tribute to the Median

Empire; however, Cyrus led campaigns against them and eventually conquered the entire Median Empire.

However, this is Herodotus’ version of the story, and the events that occur seem to fit in with other Greek legends, namely Perseus1. He says that Astyages ordered Cyrus executed after a series of disturbing dreams foretold that Cyrus would overthrow him, but he was instead given to farm folk. Later, Astyages stumbled upon him and noticed his resemblance with him. He asked the man who was supposed to execute him, and he admitted that he had given him away to the farmer. As punishment, Astyages made the man eat his own son, whom he had chopped up (Tantalus reference). After that, Astyages allowed Cyrus to return to his biological parents, and decided to let fate take its course.

But, at any rate, Cyrus later became the head of a small government, and soon rebelled against his grandfather due to a disagreement in policy and

1 Of course, this particular story of Perseus being discarded after an Oracle foretelling he would kill his grandfather is stolen from the Epic of Gilgamesh, an ancient Babylonian tale. So… yeah.

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implementation. Thus, in 559 BCE, he overthrew the old government and created a new one- the Achaemenid Empire. After that, he began a massive military campaign and later added several countries and other empires to his own, due to his own grandfather’s alliances. They refused to acknowledge Cyrus as the rightful ruler of the Achaemenid Empire (they still called it the Median Empire) and they warred against him as they would any rebel.

The empires that stood against Cyrus were the Lydian Empire, Asia Minor, and the Babylonian Empire. Eventually, he conquered them all (in that order) due to a mutual military genius between himself and his generals.

During this time, the Hebrew were captured and enslaved by the Babylonians, due to ‘losing the faith’ according to the Bible. However, they were soon freed by

Cyrus, who was the first to treat the Hebrew as equal in a legal sense in a foreign country. The Bible states that one of Cyrus’ advisors was Daniel, a Hebrew, who had to persuade him to institute these changes by performing various miracles, and spending the night in a lion’s den. I digress, however- Babylon was not the first country in the Achaemenid Empire, and the ‘equality for all’ policy was well in place when Cyrus conquered Babylon. Regardless, Cyrus allowed the Hebrew to leave Babylon and return to Israel to rebuild the temple of Solomon. Due to this,

Cyrus is the one gentile of whom the Old Testament speaks well. I do believe they even used the term ‘messiah’ to describe him, meaning ‘anointed one.’

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The biblical story of Cyrus and the historical one do not line up at any point besides the fact that Cyrus freed the Hebrew slaves and treated them equally; and despite all of this praise from the Hebrew people, the aptly named ‘Cyrus

Cylinder,’ an archaeological artifact which details the life of Cyrus, never speaks of any other god besides Ahura Mazda. It makes no mention of Cyrus ever worshipping another god, or even acknowledging another god in his own life.

How odd that all of these supposed miracles were not enough to convert such an astute fellow.

Yet again, the idea of a ‘Second Coming’ is taken from an Old Testament

Apocryphal book, in which it states that Cyrus will return and lead the world once again. It’s funny when you take the Apocrypha out of the equation, because when you see the prophecies of all the subsequent authors of books, they make constant reference to this book that nobody else has ever heard of. Not to mention, the returning messiah who was supposed to bring peace to the world was supposed to be the second coming of Cyrus, and there was no ‘third coming’ mentioned. The next messiah was supposed to create utopia.

Cyrus has many, many other legends attributed to him; perhaps foremost, the founder of Rome, Romulus, was reported to have lived with wolves. This is taken from Herodotus yet again, where Herodotus states that Cyrus was suckled by ‘a bitch.’ However, Herodotus goes on to explain that ‘bitch’ was actually the name of a slave whose name was ‘Spaco,’ which means ‘bitch’ in Median.

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Herodotus says that Cyrus died due to military overconfidence in a fight with a tribe called the Massagetae. He states that Cyrus did try to befriend them, but due to the fact that Cyrus had conquered several of their close relatives, they declined at every turn. Eventually, Cyrus decided to invade, and left his worst troops guarding a camp stocked with wine as a lure to the Massagetae, who had no knowledge of liquor whatsoever. They easily conquered the camp, drank the wine, and once they were quite intoxicated Cyrus ambushed them and took them prisoner. However, among the group, there was the son of the leader of the

Massagetae, who ended up killing himself in shame. This infuriated his mother, who lead all of her troops against Cyrus in what Herodotus says may have been the most epic battle of the ancient world. Her forces killed Cyrus and defeated his army. She had them bring her Cyrus’ body, which she had beheaded and crucified post-mortem. So ends the final chapter of the greatest leader of the

Achaemenid Empire.

However, Cyrus’ death is another one of those historical mysteries- practically every source on the matter tells a different story. Some say he died in battle in every country from Egypt to India, and some say he died at home, watching the sun set out his bedroom window. Here’s another page in history that must begrudgingly be filled in with speculation and Herodotus.

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Cyrus did have two sons, but they both died and left the throne of the

Achaemenid Empire vacant. During this time, a pretender to be his son named

Gaumata ruled for a short period, before he was killed by Darius the Great, who later set his own family as the royal line for the Achaemenid Empire. His claim to the throne was shaky at first; however, Darius married Cyrus’ daughter Atossa, giving him the position of Emperor cleanly, legally, and legitimately.

Darius also carries the title ‘Great,’ but was much more a domestic leader than

Cyrus. His rule is credited with greatly improving the quality of life in the empire, further promoting Zoroastrianism, and several building projects, the most famous being the Suez Canal. Also, he is noted for his incredible grace and mercy regarding human rights- he was one of the very first to pay his soldiers, and completely disallowed slavery, and made sure that every worker in his empire was paid proportionately to his duty. However, he did little to amend the increasing animosity between the Achaemenids and Greeks- Greek folks most likely remember him as the emperor during the battle of Marathon, from which we get our modern term, ‘marathon.’ Much of the ‘bad blood’ between the

Achaemenids and Greeks comes from Darius’ lack of concern about Greek colonies on the shore of Asia Minor1, which he considered part of his empire. The

Greeks funded revolts in Achaemenid territory as revenge for taking their colonies, and in return Darius attempted to attack Greece three times. He was

1 The Greeks and Persians are perhaps some of the oldest enemies of the Ancient World, their feud going back all the way to the original Greek invasion of the city of Troy.

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beaten the first two, and he died before he could start the third. This particular

Achaemenid king had twenty two children (that we know about- what a pimp1).

Perhaps his most famous son is his successor, Xerxes the Great (or the First), born of Atossa (not one of Darius’ many other wives), therefore giving Xerxes both blood claim to the throne on his mother’s side and legitimacy from his father’s side. Achaemenid history states that his ambition was to spread a holy empire as far as possible, preaching the word of equality and unity, like his grandfather and father before him.

There are some who digress, namely the Hebrews and Herodotus. The Hebrew religion says that Esther married Xerxes2 and had to dissuade him from genocide. Call me skeptical, but I do not believe that for a second- the

Achaemenid Empire was built upon the pillars of equality and peace, which they actually practiced. Herodotus digresses because the Greeks and Achaemenids had always been at odds, but particularly when Xerxes and the Greeks had a breakdown of communication, leading to war in 480 BC.

Xerxes was historically not as exalted as his predecessors- among many character faults, he had an incredible rage that was easily roused by personally disrespecting him, insulting him, or showing him dishonor.

1 I mean ‘pimp’ in the American slang terms, denoting one who is very virile or otherwise ‘cool,’ not the otherwise definition of a perpetuator of degeneration through binding whores to him in servitude. 2 Some cite Atraxerxes I or II as the one that it is referring to. However, despite that discrepancy, they were both emperors in the same line of Zoroastrians.

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More dramatized accounts of the story1 depict a messenger riding into Sparta, carrying the severed heads of kings, demanding a declaration of surrender and subservience to the arrogant god-king Xerxes and his army of mutants and monsters. The Greeks refused, and killed the messenger. Thus, the Spartans sent an elite three-hundred man fighting force headed by King Leonidas to defend Thermopylae pass from Xerxes, depicted as sitting on a gigantic throne of marble and gold, made grotesque by piercings and tattoos. Xerxes sent wave after wave of his most abominable creatures against the three hundred, but they remained steady and held the pass. Eventually, Xerxes did kill them and it took him a year to move his army into Greece, where he was soundly beaten by the allied Greeks.

However, this chain of events was very unlikely. Herodotus is one of the few to report upon this story, and he is not well known for being ‘truthful and objective’ in his reporting of history. He even made the absurd assertion that Xerxes army had five million soldiers in it. 2 Now, let me share with you what I believe happened.

1 Namely the movie 300 Spartans, or the remake 300. Herodotus’ retelling of the story is quite dramatic in and of itself, and the movies are based (quite accurately) off of Herodotus’ version of the story. 2 Herodotus’ estimates were doubled to include support personnel, and then multiplied by ten because of a misunderstanding of the Persian words for thousand and ten-thousand. Modern historians place estimates at Xerxes’ army at about 200,000 soldiers, and high end estimates are around 750,000. It’s also worth noting that if Xerxes army truly did have five million soldiers in it, that is a neat 1/20th of the world’s population at the time. That would be akin to an empire having 350 million active troops in an army in modern terms, but considerably less plausible in nature.

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Xerxes had acquired several countries by bartering and flexing his imperial muscles, so to speak. He did not think Greece any different, so he sent his messengers ahead with the general message of "Come join my great empire, and we’ll all be equals" which had worked quite well so far. However, this message must have either been relayed through a rather stupid messenger, or the Greeks found this invitation rather offensive. So, they killed the messenger, which made Xerxes rather irritated. So, Xerxes decided to get off his ass, move his army to Greece, and have a ‘heart to heart’ with the Greeks with his army behind him. However, the Greeks understandably took this gesture as a threat or declaration of war. So, they sent forth an elite fighting force of three hundred

Spartans1 to defend the Thermopylae pass. Even in Herodotus’ version of the story, Xerxes spent several days personally trying to reason with the soldiers, despite that his version contained the detail that he made several veiled threats.

Regardless, communication broke down between the two, and Xerxes became increasingly angry that he was not allowed to speak to Greek officials about what had transpired. So, Xerxes marched on the line set up by the soldiers, but the

Greeks surprised the Achaemenids by having their fleet hide behind a mountain where they could not see it. The Achaemenids came on a mission of diplomacy, and were understandably quite surprised and overwhelmed by the Greek navy.

Herodotus estimates that the Achaemenid Empire had a fleet of 1,200 Triremes and 3,000 Galleys. He does not explicitly state the size of Greek navy, but he

1 Also, other Greek cities contributed thousands of soldiers. The rough total falls between 1300 and 5000. However, the generally accepted range of accuracy is about 3000-4500. Even in the best case scenario for Greece, the Achaemenids still outnumbered the Greeks 40 to 1.

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does say that the Greeks defended the pass from the Achaemenids for a considerable time.

At first, Xerxes thought that the army at Thermopylae was the entire Greek army, and he laughed at them for being so stupid as to send such a small force against his army. However, he was rather shocked when the Greeks tore apart his first wave of troops due to the Phalanx technique, which utilized incredibly long spears and large shields, which were more usable in the current situation than the short Persian spears and swords. This instance did much to anger him, and caused him to release his legendary temper and it is said he ordered his soldiers flogged1.

But, despite the valiant efforts of the various Greeks, they were defeated due to the efforts of Ephialtes, a Greek defector who showed Xerxes a hidden path in the mountains that allowed his troops to bypass the phalanx.2 Once the Persians had surrounded them, they laid down their arms and surrendered. Several went on to join Xerxes’ army.

Herodotus says the Xerxes had Leonidas’ corpse beheaded and crucified since he was such a pain to defeat. He explicitly notes “This was unusual conduct, since the Achaemenids usually treated great warriors with honor after death,

1 Thank goodness Call of Duty wasn't around back then. Xerxes probably would have killed people in rage. 2 This technique was never effectively countered by the Achaemenids- Alexander the Great used it while invading their empire in 330 BC, and it still retained a good bit of effectiveness against the Persians.

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regardless of which side they fought on.” I do wonder if Herodotus added that in as a parallel to Cyrus, or if it actually occurred like he said.

Xerxes then led his army to Greece, where he set upon conquering the area, since Thermopylae pass resisted so heavily which angered him a great deal.

Instead of spreading his word of peace and equality like Cyrus before him, he began to start killing Greeks because Leonidas made him loathe them.

However, before he could completely conquer the peninsula, the Babylonians rebelled due to a rather rash decision he made a few years earlier. Xerxes took down one of the idols that the Babylonians had erected with his own hands, and proclaimed that Zoroastrianism was the law of the land. Understandably, the

Babylonians were quite pissed, but they kept it to themselves until Xerxes had actually broken the tenets of his religion and started his brutal war with the

Greeks. Eventually, they looked at each other and said “Hey, why are we listening to this hypocrite?”

Xerxes had to leave Greece half-conquered and return to tend to Babylon, which he did over the course of a few years. While tending to the rebellion, the Greeks constantly attacked the Persians, as if to say ‘Hey, this isn’t over until we say it’s over!’ But, within five years, the Athenians and Spartans had turned to killing each other yet again, and effectively ending the war. After that, Xerxes did not do much of historical significance.

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However, Xerxes must have passed on his violent tendencies to his son

Atraxerxes. He openly murdered Xerxes’ two other sons in line for the throne before him. Atraxerxes is remembered in the Bible, in the book of Ezra, for giving

Ezra control over the affairs of the Jewish nation, and in effect granting them further independence under the Achaemenid rule. Apparently his murderous character flaws were less worth mentioning in the Bible than his father’s temper.

The ‘valiant’ Achaemenid leaders seem to have died out after Darius (and debatably Xerxes), and the empire began to lean more towards power-grubbing than promoting understanding and equality as early as the later years of the reign of Xerxes. Thus, it turned from virtuous to corrupt, as practically all empires eventually do- most prominently those of a monarchic nature, with a single family and line ruling for centuries on end.

Yet again, it is worth noting that if Xerxes had kept a cool head about things, the

Babylonians may have never rebelled, and the battle at Thermopylae and concurrent war may have never occurred at all, allowing Xerxes to retain his virtue and spread the word of Zarathustra in a peaceful manner. However, this war is an excellent showcase of the general mentality of war- this is one of many wars where neither side is ‘right’ or ‘wrong,’ but war begins due to a case of miscommunication.

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After this period of imperial degradation, the son of the king of Macedon raised a gigantic army and began to raze the world behind him. At this point, the

Achaemenid Empire had grown so weak that it wasn’t even able to put up a decent fight against Alexander. It’s spectacular that an empire that conquered

Alexander’s homeland 130 years ago had grown so weak, both in military and social structure.

Alexander invaded Babylon, Israel, and all of the other countries of the empire.

He destroyed many of the records of the achievements of the Achaemenid

Empire, including many parts of the Avesta. Some say that he did this out of jealousy- the Achaemenid Empire was larger than Alexander’s at the time, and he considered it an insult that such a weak empire had surpassed his own prowess. Perhaps it was a personal grudge that his family had held since they fought against Xerxes, who preached a path that he did not follow. Some even speculate that Alexander thought it an insult to his self-glorifying cult of divinity to have the Persians worship another god. Regardless, the first destruction of the

Avesta came to pass.

But, Alexander died, mortal as he was, and he left his empire ‘To the strongest’ of his generals. Of course, each of his generals thought that he was the strongest, and they began to bicker and fight amongst each other, with the lines of empires constantly readjusting and moving haphazardly around. This

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particular trend continued for a good long while, until the Roman Empire distracted them from their squabble some two-hundred years later.

But, during the heyday of the Achaemenid Empire, there were interesting happenings in India. One of the greatest religious leaders to ever live was born in

Nepal,1 particularly the Kapilvatsu region. He was born Siddhartha Gautama, destined to later become a Buddha.

Practically the entire story of Buddha’s life is legend, and very little historical reporting was going on at the time. In this instance, the story will have to suffice due to lack of historical evidence otherwise. However, while in many cases, the legend is a poor substitute for historical accounts, this one seems to line up quite snugly in a sense of logical happenings.

Buddhist legend states that there were several good omens and portents before he was born, and slightly afterwards his father, King Suddhodana, called a large party and invited several mystics to tell of his child’s future. Every one present said the same thing- his child was either to become a great king or a holy man. A sage named Kaundinya even stated that he would become a Buddha.

However, things were not all ‘peachy.’ Siddhartha’s birth caused the death of his poor mother Maya through pregnancy related problems. Tradition holds that she died a week after Siddhartha was born.

1 It was a territory of the great Indian Empire at the time.

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For the first era of his life, Siddhartha was often restless, feeling that there was something he was not being told. His suspicions were correct- his father tried to have every citizen of his area with afflictions or of extreme age hidden from his view. He did quite the remarkable job- he was thirty before he saw an old man.

He had no idea that people aged so extremely, and he realized that his father had hidden the truth from him. The story goes that he sought and later found diseased men, decaying corpses, and an ascetic man.

He escaped from his father’s palace in an event called ‘The Great Departure,’ and began living his life as a beggar with other ascetics, asking for alms in the kingdom of King Bimbisara. He was recognized by the King’s men, but he left, promising to return to his kingdom once he had attained his enlightenment.

His ascetic companions ate very little, and often did not eat at all. As such, the entire group was incredibly skinny and gaunt. It is said that he found their practices to be empty1, so he went into a nearby village from the meadow where they were living and accepted some food from a small girl who believed him to be some manner of apparition, due to his ghastly appearance. Once he had taken the food, he seated himself under a Bodhi tree, and he meditated until he found the truth which his asceticism and sheltered life had caused him to miss.

1 Much like his stomach. I’m a regular cut-up.

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The story goes that he remained under that tree for close to fifty days, accepting the occasional morsel or drink from the citizens of the village. It is under that tree that he became enlightened, and earned his title ‘Buddha.’

The Buddha actually doubted the ability of the common man to understand his revelation. The story says that a spirit appeared to him, and told him that even though most would not, there would be some who could comprehend his truth.

So, he went out and spread the word of his newfound religion. He had two converts, both traders, by the end of the first day.

After that, Buddha set out to find the mystic who had predicted that he would attain enlightenment, but he was disappointed to find that he had died. So, instead he sought his ascetic friends and quickly converted them. The sage

Kaundinya who foretold he would be a Buddha and followed Siddhartha all the way from his birth to his asceticism (but disowned him after he renounced his ascetic lifestyle) became the first human to fully understand the teachings from

Buddha’s mouth, and was the first non-Buddha to become enlightened.

Buddha then gathered all of his followers and their converts- a rather small number at the time, and held a sermon for them in a park. That is one of the last notable incidents of that section of the Buddha’s life.

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It is said that all who sat and listened to the Buddha talk immediately joined his following, and across the entirety of his life only a few men denied his teachings after hearing them from his mouth. The sermon in the park marks another end of an era in Buddha’s life, and his third and final era ended with his death.

His father eventually heard of him, due to rumors of this ‘enlightened man’ spreading his word across the kingdom. It is said that he sent ten messengers to bring him back, but Buddha converted them all, except that the last one was sent with a kind message instead of force. Buddha did hear his father’s request to return from the final messenger, and he slowly made his way to his father’s castle, preaching the entire way.

So, he returned to the castle and his father greeted him, saying “Ours is the warrior lineage, and warriors do not seek alms.” Even though he had clearly been insulted, Buddha replied “No, it is not the custom of your warrior lineage, but it is the custom of my Buddha lineage.” During that particular visit, Buddha converted practically every member of his family except for his father. It is notable that

Buddha’s cousin, Devadatta1, converted at this time- he is remembered for trying to kill the Buddha repeatedly after his conversion.

His assassination attempts are quite funny, simply because they are so futile. At first, he hired assassins to kill Buddha outright, but he met them and converted

1 A funny side note: Devadatta (the name, meaning ‘God-given,’ or ‘divine gift’) is a key figure in several Hindu prophecies and stories. In the prophecy of Kalki, Devadatta is the winged horse that Kalki rides to defeat Kali. In the Bhagavad Gita, Arjuna’s conch shell is named Devadatta.

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them before they could do their jobs. Secondly, he tried to smash him by rolling a boulder down a hill, but all it did was scrape his foot. Finally, he drugged an elephant and set it loose, with the intent of it killing him. However, this did not work (a long story) and he tried more subtle methods, like trying to cause a schism in his followers. It succeeded at first, but after a short while they found his promises fell flat and they went to rejoin the Buddha. After that, he just gave up.

Buddha’s father eventually fell very ill, and when Buddha heard this news he rushed to the castle to see his father before his death. On his deathbed, his father renounced Hinduism and embraced his son’s religion. Several of the women tending to his father were intensely moved, and wanted to join the company of the Buddha as well. It took years for the women to convince Buddha that they were just as capable of enlightenment as his male followers, and eventually he allowed them to join his group.

The story cuts out there, rematerializing around the time of Buddha’s death. He lived to be eighty years old- quite spectacular at the time. A follower of his cooked him a dinner of pork and he ate it, quite gracefully. However, after eating the pork, he fell violently ill.1 He told a friend who was at his house not to blame the chef, that it was time that his physical form left the world as well. He told him that he had transcended the world spiritually long ago, and now his shell needed to follow, to serve as some kind of example to his followers. So, his friend took

1 Historians state that it was likely that he was poisoned in this meal. Perhaps yet another assassin interfered. Also, the Buddha’s last meal is the basis for the Eucharist five hundred years later.

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him into the forest and gathered his followers, and they all watched Gautama

Buddha die of his malady. Afterwards, they cremated him, and that is where the story of the Buddha’s life ends.

You know, after reading this story, it’s remarkable how much even Buddhism seemed like a cult at first. I suppose that’s how all religions start out, in any case.

Speaking of that, another one of these interesting little ‘cults’ that would shape the world were forming in China at this time, headed by Confucius and later, Lao

Tsu.

Confucianism is not treated as a world religion by the technical definition;

Confucius offered no explanation as to where human souls go when they die.

However, despite that discrepancy, Confucius’ perspectives (and subsequent clever quips) are very thoughtful, and governed China for centuries, and later greatly impacted Western thought. Information about Confucius and pre-

Common Era Far East is usually taken from the Records of the Grand Historian, akin to Herodotus’ Histories from Greece but with considerably less bias.

Confucius was born just twelve years after Buddha, yet it is highly unlikely that the two ever met (due to geological barriers, and Confucius never left China, as to my knowledge). He was a child of good birth, but his family was having financial troubles at the time. The record states that his birth was formed outside of typically accepted lines, which I believe denotes that he was conceived outside

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of marriage. When he was three, his father died and his poor mother had to raise him.

The first part of Confucius’ life is fairly mundane; he married a woman named Qi

Quan and one year later had a child named Kong Li. He had a series of odd jobs involving manual labor at this point, until his mother died, and then he mourned for three years.

Thirty years after the death of his mother (he was fifty-three at this point) he was appointed to the position of Justice Minister in his home kingdom. Eventually, he left due to an embarrassment on the part of his superiors, and he wandered around gathering disciples and whatnot. He died twenty years after his appointment to Justice Minister at the age of seventy-three, outliving his own son.

Confucius lived a very long and fruitful life, and he wrote many works that shaped the Far East and set the moral values for the people that live there. He hardly ever used reason in his arguments or tidbits of wisdom (famous from American

Fortune Cookies: Confucius says…). I do not know the specific time frame for his books, but I assume they were lifelong devotions of his; he preached his word until he died at the ripe old age of seventy-three.

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Despite his authorship of several of his own books, his disciples took it upon themselves to write down several of his nuggets of wisdom in a compilation called the Analects.

Among the many values that Confucius praised, family values, honor, and hard work/diligence came it at the very top of his list. He preached a very similar word to Buddha and Zarathustra, extolling truth above superstition. He taught one particularly interesting student, whose name translates into English in many different ways- however, I call him Lao Tsu.

The Records of the Grand Historian gives various stories involving Lao Tsu, but only one stating that he was the disciple of Confucius. His teachings are fairly consistent with Confucius, emphasizing wisdom and truth, but his way is a more religious path (since he did specify what happens after death). He had a series of interesting ideas, involving balance, wholeness, and dualism (all three visible in the Yin-Yang). Some of his followers make the assertion (without evidence) that

Lao Tsu lived for more than a century and taught the Buddha (which would not make sense for several reasons). Between Lao Tsu and Confucius, we have the general religious make-up of the Far East (excluding Japan, what with their

Shinto-Paganism and all), with the path divided between the secular (Confucius) and the mystical (Lao Tsu).

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Now, I am afraid that not much of great historical (religious) significance happened between Lao Tsu and this next guy, so I’m going to have to skip about four-hundred years of history (sorry, historians. Don’t have a heart attack). This next guy is quite possibly the most socially and ethically controversial figure to ever exist, preaching the word of servitude to him, since he was both God and his son at the same time (and the Holy Spirit as well, off to the side). Now, without further ado… Jesus of Nazareth.

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II:III- The Common Era/Anno Domini

“History is the depository of great actions, the witness of what is past, the

example and instructor of the present, and monitor to the future.”

-Miguel Cervantes

Jesus’ life is completely without historical documentation. I feel as though I should state that. Despite all of these alleged miracles and signs, neither the

Romans (Israel’s imperial ruler) or the Parthian Empire (Israel’s next closest reliable neighbor, part of the post-Alexander Achaemenid Empire) mentioned him in a single record even once1. The only accepted source for his life is from four of his twelve disciples, whose names are carried on by the testaments that they wrote- Matthew, Mark, Luke and John2. Ah, it stinks of bias already.

It’s also worth noting that Israel was an area under heavy surveillance by the

Roman Empire due to its nasty habit of fostering revolts, either out of nostalgia for the good ol’ days of independence and kind Zoroastrian overlords, or just plain dislike of the Roman polytheistic system and tax policies. Regardless, there

1 The closest reliable record I have been able to find pertaining to Jesus (and even then, it only attests that a man named Jesus was crucified) was written a good twenty years after his death. It’s also worth noting that the so-called ‘Holy Gospels’ were written in about 100 AD, more than 65 years after the death of Jesus. His apostles would have easily been in excess of 80 years old at that point, their minds ravaged by disease and senility, and most likely dead anyway. Yet, they claim to have remembered Jesus’ words exactly. 2 Among these four, I detest the writings of Matthew the most, because he routinely compromises historical accuracy for some need to ‘fulfill prophecy’ that in several cases is not even true prophecy. I would consider the writings of John to be the most accurate of the four; however, that’s not saying much. It’s like saying he’s the most honorable murderer on death row, the kindest thief who has stolen two thousand years of history… and so on.

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are many, many records from the time in Israel. One story that the Romans did record is the execution of John the Baptist due to the whims of a king’s daughter.

However, despite the official recording of an old-timey equivalent of a soapbox street preacher being executed, there is absolutely no mention of Jesus or any significant following that he had.

Christians claim that Jesus’ birth and subsequent life fulfilled ancient Hebrew prophecy. It really is interesting how well he fits into prophecy. It’s also interesting how several of these prophecies that he didn’t fulfill are immediately written off, attributed to what his ‘second coming’ will do, despite the fact that the original prophecy in question makes no mention of it taking two incarnations to fulfill those prophecies. The first prophecies that Jesus fulfilled were being born to

Joseph, a descendant of David and a young virgin, Mary1. These four disciples tell radically different stories upon his life, to the point of not adding up correctly.

You know, this reminds me of a joke. Four students come in late to a college final, and they apologize profusely to their professor, because they said they had a flat tire. The professor, being the merciful man he is, agrees to let them take a test- not the same one as everyone else, however. He sends the four students to

1 The Christian interpretation of the passage Isaiah 7:14 is a mistranslation of the original passage- the phrase used is ‘Young woman,’ not ‘Virgin.’ It appears as though Matthew was covering all of his bases by having Jesus born to a woman both young and a virgin. There are dozens upon dozens of such mistranslations. If you know a Hebrew, I’m sure they would be glad to give you a long list of biblical mistranslations, along with the title at the top of ‘One of the Many Reasons I’m Not a Christian.’

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different corners of the room, and they open their tests and find only one question: “So, which tire was flat?”

Christianity fails the test of consistency, completely and utterly. Now, if you don’t care for truth, facts, history, and reality, then it is still acceptable to believe in.

But, perhaps I should provide you with the story and point of some examples before I make such audacious claims. If you would like a much more comprehensive look into Biblical contradictions and falsities, I would recommend the whopping five-hundred page book, An Encyclopedia of Bible Difficulties by

Gleason Archer1. If that doesn’t quite do it for you, several skeptics have published books exposing contradictions and errors in semantics in the Bible in recent years. I’m sure there’s dozens of them, and I won’t bother you with listing them all. I find them all equally without merit. I really couldn’t care less if historical dates aren’t completely accurate or else I’d have a problem with every religion, bar none. I care more for sentiment- when you lie and try to make things line up when they don’t, then I have a problem with it.

Oddly enough, Buddhism had a very similar way of preserving the traditions of

Buddha’s teachings (by way of mouth) and though the stories did get ‘jazzed up’

(i.e., the Buddha was made to seem superhuman) a little bit in a different way by each of his followers and their respective disciples and so forth, the same core stories were preserved across a dozen different individuals. It was two hundred

1 Spoiler warning- the author is a Christian priest, and tries feebly to assert: ‘This actually happened, damn it!’ Apologetics are so much fun.

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years after the death of the Buddha that his teachings were written down in the

Pali Canon, as opposed to somewhere between 60 and 100 years for the apostles’ stories being recorded. How very odd that across four stories that took somewhere between a third and a half of the time to degrade and a third of the necessary consensus of Buddhism, there is still a staggering amount of inconsistency in the New Testament, as opposed to very little in Buddhism. Also, as opposed to the Bible, Buddha and his disciples cared very little for chronology and as such the stories of the Pali Canon do not contain the various little

(sometimes anachronous) blurbs of history that the Bible do, and still you don’t hear anybody offering any significant evidence that ‘Buddha didn’t exist’ or ‘he wasn’t a great teacher.’ However, for the sake of argument, I’ll say that Jesus did live.

Now, Jesus was born unto ‘the virgin Mary’ and ‘understandably angry Joseph’ on a night in a manger, and shepherds out in the fields were visited by an angel and told to visit the baby Jesus. The official position of many Christians is that this happened on December 25th, but that is absurd- no shepherd would be out in the dead of winter, much less tending his flock. They would most likely already be mutton in his stomach.

Herod is a Jewish ruler who has been defamed (by libel, might I add) for ordering the murder of every Jewish baby in the Bible, because he heard that Jesus had been born through some wise men that journeyed for three years to see Jesus.

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The Bible doesn’t mention that Herod died in 4 BC, and that Augustus Caesar’s census (not actually his, either. It was a local census, conducted by the governor) was conducted in 6 AD. Now, add three years onto that for the story of the Magi, and you have a thirteen-year old decaying corpse, suffering from Rigor Mortis and advanced necrophagia by worms, ordering the slaughter of innocents. That sounds likely. Due to this particular chronological biblical inaccuracy, Jesus’ birthdate cannot be accurately pinpointed to a specific year in the range of ten years between 4 BC and 6 AD.

While on the subject of Jesus’ birth and this particular story, the assertion that

Magi, meaning something along the lines of Mazda-worshippers or followers of

Zarathustra (yes, the word ‘magic’ shares roots with the word ‘magi’), travelled three years to bring Jesus gifts and bowed at his feet is absurd at best, and logically all but impossible. The prophecy of Aushedar (the savior after

Zarathustra, but two before Saoshyant) makes a mention of a bright light, but it is specified as the sun hanging in the sky for ten days on end, not a bright star hanging over Jerusalem for three years. Even though this event obviously never occurred, it is taken as prophecy, much like a good bit of Jesus’ young life.

The Apocryphal book of Thomas tells the story of young Jesus, and all kinds of horrible, frightening, malevolent things he did. Of course, it’s not fair for me to incorporate the Apocrypha into this argument- I would prefer to focus on what

Christians actually believe. So far, I have three ‘inexplicable historical

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inaccuracies’ towards my argument that ‘The Bible is just a story’ and zero towards ‘This actually happened, damn it!’ just using what Christians actually believe. If I incorporated the Apocrypha, I’m sure I could get a triple-digit number or higher. Hell, Gleason Archer got five-hundred pages of it just from the canonized Bible.

So, the story goes that Jesus grew up and went around recruiting disciples, curing disease, walking on water and holding huge sermons with thousands in attendance. How odd that he went completely unnoticed by historians at the time.

The supposed miracles he performed had already been done in other religions-

Transfiguration is a common one among Pagans, particularly the Greeks (a story of Bacchus contains water to wine), walking on water is part of the legend of

Buddha, meeting with the devil in the desert is a Zoroastrian story… and so on.

I do not doubt that a man named Jesus existed, and was born to a man named

Joseph and a woman (a girl, by modern standards) named Mary in a town called

Bethlehem. However, I do doubt that this man was the Son of God, or that he had any kind of supernatural powers. I am of the firm belief that ‘The Bible is just a story,’ and all history from the time and fundamentally basic common sense seem to point that way.

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So, afterwards, the ruling class wanted Jesus dead (yet another Zoroastrian plagiarism) so they bribed Judas Iscariot1 to betray him (for thirty pieces of silver) to the local government.

Judas Iscariot’s death is described twice in the Bible- yes, it’s the same guy, but he dies at completely different times from completely different things. In the book of Matthew, he goes back to the temple from which he took bribes to sell out

Jesus, he throws his money at the priests, and goes out and hangs himself from a tree (another of Matthew’s fulfillment of pseudo-prophecy, involving an ancient

Hebrew law in Deuteronomy). In the book of Acts, he falls headlong to the ground in a field and his intestines fall out.

But, there are a series of historical inaccuracies surrounding Jesus’ death and subsequent resurrection2. Jesus was brought before the crowds, and the crowd was asked "Do you want to see this man die?" They said yes, let a murderer go so we can crucify Jesus. He was then taken to Pontius Pilate, who charged him with ‘Claiming to be the King of the Jews.’ He even made a sign to that effect-

INRI3 which he placed on top of the cross. The soldiers placed some robes on him, along with a thorn of crowns, whipped him a bit, and then they made him

1 Judas Iscariot’s story is nothing more than a grasp to fulfill prophecy. Zechariah makes a reference to the Lord being worth thirty pieces of silver (to a potter). However, this story is a story in and of itself, not a prophecy. Yet another one of Matthew’s perceived fulfillment of prophecy. 2 It really is stunning to see how differently each apostle tells the story. They all claim they were there, but they all seem to remember drastically different events. 3 The actual ‘INRI’ is an abbreviation for the Latin “Iesvs Nazarenvs Rex Ivdaeorvm,” or in English “Jesus the Nazarene, King of the Jews,” which is what was actually on the sign. However, as the actual phrase is very long and difficult to type (I know very little Latin), I simply use the abbreviation INRI in all cases. Also noteworthy is the omission of the word ‘Christvs,’ which Pilate surely would have attached if he were mocking him. Perhaps it was an apostolic addendum.

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carry his own cross (with a bit of help from a man named Simon of Cyrene, according to all except John) to Golgotha, ‘the place of a skull.’

So, the apostles told remarkably different stories about the crucifixion of Jesus, and practically none of the details line up with all four of them. Speaking of that, here are some of his supposed last words:

 My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (the only one upon which

even two apostles agree)

 Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.

 It is finished.

 Father, into your hands I commend my spirit!

Now, Christians like to twist history and scripture to suit their own ends; to claim prophecy where there is none, to claim a profound nature to the mundane. The

Norwegian avant-garde band Arcturus actually did the same, but they used the first quotation as evidence towards an idea that Jesus converted to Satanism1 upon his death. The claim is that his cry of ‘My god, my god, why have you forsaken me?’ came about when he realized he had been betrayed, and decided to entrust his soul to the Devil in desperation, and thus the Devil let him be

1 This isn’t modern Satanism- this is unbridled Devil worship, much like the motif of the entire album; La Masquerade Infernale’s final track, Of Nails and Sinners, is told from the perspective of Jesus. It has a series of lines that would be absolutely infuriating to Christians, such as ‘A rebel I was, radiant my glow, afar/My wisdom fathomed by the Morningstar’ and ‘…O you fools, in herd- like fright, stampede/And when creation falls, you must build anew/With nails that sting my hands. They grow passionate on a lie/But you know the voracious one was I.’

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resurrected (in his power, not God’s) to spread the word of the Devil to the disciples. And, I must say, it makes as much sense as any other theological theory about the death and resurrection of Jesus.

I find this line interesting- the only possibly historically accurate one- ‘My God, my

God, why have you forsaken me?’ Why, you’re not forsaken, Jesus. God hasn’t forsaken you unless you have forsaken yourself. You are god… right?

Warning: This next section contains original research and conclusions. As to my knowledge, no other historian or man of any profession has ever made this assertion. To that, I say I don’t need historians to prove this one. I have a reputable medical source, and perhaps more importantly, logic.

When a Roman soldier stuck Jesus with a spear after a short while (John 19:34), he discovered he was already dead, before he had broken his legs (necessary for a crucifixion to kill an individual; it chokes them) and his bodily fluids had diffused into blood and water. Now, this is interesting- this diffusion of fluids would be due to a medical condition called effusion, which causes a buildup of fluid in a certain area. This condition may be caused by several different things, such as heart trauma or lupus, but I believe it was due to cancer. Yes, I believe

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the self-proclaimed Lord and Savior of humanity had cancer, and it killed him1 when he was about to be executed. That is, of course, assuming that John recorded it correctly. Perhaps they should rewrite the gospel, particularly John

3:16: “For God so loved the world, that he inflicted his one and only son with cancer and subsequently had him crucified during the advanced stages of said disease.” Ah, the Old Testament god lives yet. This is one place where

Christianity would better off if John was wrong, isn’t it?

I would prefer that John went into more detail in the matter- as to my knowledge,

I don’t believe that John had any reason to falsify the story about water coming out of Jesus’ side due to some prophecy, which makes the chance of this event being historically accurate considerably greater than the rest of… well, the entire

New Testament, really.

The side that the soldier stuck the spear into is of great importance in diagnosis of effusion- if he stuck it into the left side of his body and water poured out, then it is entirely possible that Jesus suffered from pericardial effusion, which does not necessarily rule out cancer, but it also could mean that his heart stopped out of despair, in realizing that he truly wasn’t the King of the Jews, and that he was, in fact, mortal. However, if modern portrayals of the event are correct and it was the

1 Perhaps Christians should start wearing little tumors around their necks.

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right side, that means that Jesus had pleural effusion- which makes it almost a certainty1 that Jesus had cancer- lung cancer, particularly2.

I would like to state for the record that it is an honor to diagnose the man that one third of the Earth’s population think is a god and one half believe will one day return to save their souls. I really have no idea why nobody paid better attention to the Son of God having water pour out his side when he was stuck with a spear, nor why any of the four even made the hypothesis that Jesus may well have had some affliction when he died. But, wait… affliction would make Jesus human, not the Son of God.

Instead of saying ‘Look it up yourself’ like I do with pretty much the rest of the book, I’ll lay out all the evidence you could possibly need: Every common disease that causes a pleural effusion.

There are two types of pleural effusions, and though there really is no way (or need) to differentiate between them in the case of Jesus due to the short blurb in the book of John, it’s really more just for your information; If you have an effusion, don’t assume you’re going to die. In all likeliness, if you don’t get it looked at, you probably will anyway, but you’ll die faster from one than the other.

1 Seventy-five percent of all pleural effusions are caused by cancer anyway, and since several of the other candidates are implausible, that puts the probability of cancer a near certainty. Since the probability of getting said implausible causes is even more implausible without risk factors, it thereby makes the likelihood of Jesus not having cancer even more absurdly improbable. 2 Effusion is a fairly advanced sign of any other visible conditions- Jesus would had to have been sick for a considerable while before being crucified, but nobody makes any mention of it. I’d assume his immune system turning on him (i.e. Lupus) would be worth mentioning.

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The less dangerous of the two is called a Transudative effusion (low in protein), and the more dangerous is called an Exudative effusion (high in protein).

The common possible causes of Transudative Effusions are:

- Congestive Heart Failure

- Hypothyroidism

- Pulmonary Embolism

- Nephrotic Syndrome (Kidney failure)

- Cirrhosis of the liver

The common possible causes of Exudative Effusions are:

- Lymphoma, Leukemia, Breast or Lung Cancer

- Pneumonia

- Tuberculosis

- Connective tissue auto-immune diseases

(6) - Pulmonary Embolism

The question of cancer brings us to an interesting point on Jesus’ character. A healthy thirty-year old man would not have cancer of the lungs, typically speaking; he most likely smoked some substance to an extreme excess that caused his cancer. The Eastern world would not have tobacco for another 1500 years, and marijuana did not grow very well in the Middle East, mainly in India.

There is one plant that produces an extract that can be smoked in the area-

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poppies. This extract is highly addictive- it starts with an ‘O’ and ends with an ‘m.’

It’s five letters long, in English.

Of course, lung cancer is not necessarily indicative of smoking; individuals who have never smoked a thing in their entire lives have contracted lung cancer, just as folks who have never drank can get liver cancer… and so on. The probability of cancer is increased by risk factors such as smoking and drinking, but the base probability is always there. Still, the chance of getting it without risk factors is so negligible that it’s closer to winning the lottery than choosing the correct number between one and a thousand, particularly at Jesus’ age. I have never so much as heard whispers of a perfectly healthy individual without some medical immunocompromise (such as diabetes) developing lung cancer in their early

30’s. Jesus’ lung cancer resulting from something other than heavy opium usage is practically nil- you would have better luck arguing that he didn’t have cancer in the first place.

If you still doubt that the claimed Messiah had cancer, then let me further my argument and disprove others. Jesus’ incredible physical frailty during this period would have been exacerbated (and his death expedited) by being flogged before the actual crucifixion, but still, under normal circumstances he should have had no problem bearing his cross, and he should not have collapsed. That is, unless, he was already in a weakened state due to the compound problems of pleural effusion and a malignant tumor on one of his lungs. Several of the arguments for

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effusion base themselves on the scriptures that claim that Jesus rode an ass1

(donkey) into Jerusalem, but this was in contrast to his usual mode of transportation of just walking everywhere, and his inability to support himself was a sign of physical weakness. Also, they use the idea that Jesus may have actually known he was going to die soon once he entered Jerusalem due to his difficulty breathing, and the last dinner was not so much a prediction of his crucifixion, but rather his imminent death from otherwise causes. However, since frailty would really be the only symptom that Jesus would present with a malignant lung tumor, apart from some coughing, none of the apostles would record that, because they were so enthralled by him (why, he was the son of god after all). If he had tuberculosis, lupus, cirrhosis, or any other condition that could have caused an effusion, I would like to think we could at least count on John to tell us about the symptoms, being the most honest in his reporting out of the four.

If the Bible is to be believed, than Jesus could not have had anything besides cancer. Point in case- it could not have been something contagious, or half of the disciples would have died from the same illness Jesus had, because he was touching their food at the Last Supper- breaking their bread. It also couldn’t have been something with visible symptoms, because even though I believe the apostles to be liars who would readily omit details for their own glory, I do still believe that a man named Jesus was crucified with lung cancer. Now, if Judas led the Romans to the last supper and saw this frail, diseased looking fellow

1 This could be seen as an attempt to fulfill prophecy; a futile attempt at that, as the original prophecy in Zechariah made mention of a ‘colt of a donkey,’ not a full grown donkey. Yet another mistranslation.

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hacking up a lung, being a sickly shade of yellow, or covered in a severe rash, they would not lay a finger on him. They would have him sent off to a Leper colony, instead of going through the long and arduous process of crucifixion, which involves a lot of touching. They may not have known which diseases were contagious and which ones weren’t, common foot soldiers as they likely were, but they knew well enough to stay away from sick folk. Therefore, the only slightly plausible candidate is a disease that is asymptomatic to the naked eye, non-contagious, and resulting in an effusion. The only one that fits that mould is cancer.

It could be many types of cancer, though- leukemia, lymphoma, breast cancer or lung cancer. Out of the four, we can immediately eliminate breast cancer for an obvious reason, and while leukemia and lymphoma by no means rule out the possibility that Jesus was in fact an opium addict, I don’t believe it was leukemia either, due to the common symptoms that leukemia presents with that Jesus did not exhibit, such as tiredness, lack of appetite, anemia or swelling. I don’t doubt at all it was lymphoma- lymphoma can either be an independently caused cancer of the lymphatic system or a migrant cancer from another system. Yet again, like leukemia, lymphoma causes very noticeable swelling and I doubt they would have taken Jesus away to die if the simple soldiers noticed a significant malformation in Jesus’ figure. To contract lymphoma independent from other cancers is very hard to do even with the proper risk factors, and since we can rule out any kind of contagious virus due to none of the apostles catching it, and

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he had no compromise to his immune system (beyond opium, that is) lymphoma drops back down to a negligible probability, while lung cancer shoots back up to a near certainty.

A pulmonary embolism is also a possibility, perhaps on the same level as lymphoma in probability. Pulmonary embolisms are basically clots in the lung, and most of the time even in people who have risk factors that expose them to said clots suffer no ill effects, and it is entirely benign. However, there is such a thing as a massive pulmonary embolism- the equivalent of a heart attack, or stroke, but instead of the heart or brain the lungs are affected. Even minor pulmonary embolisms are rare, with risk factors present. Massive pulmonary embolism, like lymphoma, is also a negligible probability without risk factors, the only two Jesus could have had being smoking and lung cancer. Much like lymphoma, Jesus very well could have had a pulmonary embolism, causing his death, and in all likeliness it was a result of the lung cancer.

Several people have taken the idea that Jesus had an effusion to mean that

Jesus’ effusion resulted from being nailed to the cross instead of a pre-existing condition. Interesting, but highly unlikely. As I said earlier, Jesus was having difficulty getting around (riding on a donkey) and stumbling under the very modest weight of the cross, and many other things that indicate that his effusion was already present at the time he was crucified. This also rules out practically all candidates for pericardial effusion, as well.

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Many people would also argue that Jesus was stumbling under the weight of the cross because he just got his ass beat savagely by a series of Roman soldiers. I digress. This part of the story, much like many others, is a very convenient place to embellish to garner sympathy for Jesus. I mean, after all, the Son of God is getting his tush whipped for your sins, why not make it a ridiculously fierce beating that he barely survived? That sounds cooler. Let's go with that.

So, after all the medical evidence is presented, I see but one possibility. Out of all the possible factors that could cause effusions either of the pericardium or pleura, the underlying cause would have to be asymptomatic, non-contagious and would have had to been present for a considerable while before Jesus was crucified. The only one that even remotely fits that mould is cancer, the only cancer that fits the further mould is lung cancer, and the only reasonable cause for lung cancer in an otherwise healthy individual Jesus’ age is heavy opium usage.

From here, there are three paths you could take:

1. Jesus was a man with a malignant tumor who got it from smoking a

staggering amount of opium. Such an amount of opium would severely

distort his perceptions of reality, perhaps to the point of making him

believe he was the Son of God.

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2. I am wrong just because I said Jesus was a man. Jesus said that he was

god, and Jesus wouldn’t lie. The Bible is completely and totally true,

except for the parts I used as evidence to support that Jesus had cancer.

If someone were telling you this in person, you would be sticking your

fingers in your ears and saying ‘La-la-la-la, I can’t hear you!’ You live in

the ‘practically nil’ probability that Jesus didn’t have cancer.

3. The Bible is just a story, and even the crucifixion is a baseless story.

Jesus never lived, and thus never had cancer.

Although, I feel as though that’s enough dwelling on the character of a man who most likely had his life story greatly exaggerated to the point of falsehood. The story goes that Jesus was placed in a nearby tomb, guarded by two soldiers, with a huge boulder rolled over the entrance. Three days after the crucifixion of Jesus, an angel came by and killed one of the guards ‘simply by revealing himself,’ and the other one ran off. I wish we had that guard’s skeleton. I’d check his remains for possible stab wounds to the back of the neck, and I’d check the boulder guarding the tomb for fingerprints of the apostles. But, that’s just what I’d do.

So, we continue with Jesus wandering around and talking to his disciples for forty days until he ascended (bodily) into heaven (Hinduism/Buddhism/Judaism plagiarism). Now, this is a spot where the Roman records should scream out ‘A man has come back from the dead!’ Jesus was by no means an anonymous figure (why, he was the King of the Jews, after all, according to the sign) - if he

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was out for forty days after his resurrection, I’m sure that at least one person who saw him get crucified would recognize him and report it to the authorities, and I’m sure they would make a note. But they didn’t- silence speaks volumes.

There are many, many other stories that do not make historical, logical, or just plain otherwise sense. For example, Jesus was baptized by John the Baptist- if you’re the Son of God, God, and the Holy Spirit all at the same time, why the hell would you need to get baptized? To get closer to yourself?

On a funny side note, John the Baptist’s very claim to fame is stolen from

Zoroastrianism. The ‘Baptisms’ that John is credited with inventing are nothing more than a watered down version of a Zoroastrian ritual called a Navjote, a rite of manhood in which the child in question is submerged in water (while in the presence of a fire) and after emerging from the water the child performs a recital with a priest, therefore granting them the status of adult. John’s Baptisms were nothing more than a Zoroastrian Navjote without a fire or intellectual component present. Even the man who was doing the ‘prophet gig’ before Jesus was a thief of Zoroastrian ideas.

I find it astounding that two billion people can deceive themselves into believing the Bible is original, and perhaps moreover a ‘divine revelation.’ It would almost be funny were it not so sad that people actually believed such baseless drivel.

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Now, my perspective on the matter is that there was a man named Jesus who lived in this general time period; however, due to his apostles who incorrectly recorded history repeatedly and could not get their stories straight, nearly his entire life is historically invalidated. There are only two major things I believe are true about Jesus that scripture says: That he lived, and that he was crucified for pretending to be the Son of God. Other than that, it’s ‘Just a story.’ A historical fiction, if you will. If you think that the Bible accurately portrays history, your perspective on the matter makes Herodotus seem like the best damn record keeper ever.

Now, on to his teachings, which are either taken from Judaism or are claimed as

‘original’ but were practiced by their Zoroastrian neighbors a very short distance away from them. Hmm…

 Give ten percent- A flat tax practiced in the Achaemenid Empire, given at

temple weekly

 Charity- Zoroastrianism

 Good works- Zoroastrianism

 Duality- Zoroastrianism

 God loves everybody, not just one race- Zoroastrianism

 Ultimate evil- Zoroastrianism

 Punishment for the evil in the form of Hell- Zoroastrianism

 Several parables, nearly word for word- Zoroastrianism

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 You can be ‘saved’- Zoroastrianism

 Navjote bath/Baptism - Zoroastrianism

 You have a choice between good and evil- Zoroastrianism

 Their particular version of eschatology- Zoroastrianism

But it isn’t all plagiarized:

 I am the Son of God- Original

 I am the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit all at once- Original

 I am the King of the Jews- Original

 I am right, everyone else is wrong, and every other path will lead you to

hell- Original

 Damnation is eternal and cannot be reversed- Original

 You don’t have to be good, just believe a certain way and you’re

automatically saved- Original

 Frequently using the term messiah as a descriptor, the same term having

been used to describe Cyrus the Great, who made life better for millions

and created a great empire, but instead of doing that, pissing off the

Hebrew to the point of calling for his execution- Original

 Faith in individuals who are cruel and have been proven to lie to you is

more valuable than knowledge allowing you to see past their lies- Original

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 I am good because I say I am good, and no matter how horrible my

behavior becomes I will still be good because I said so, which is a logical

fallacy called the bare assertion fallacy- Original

 “Look at the Pharisees cheat you and look down at you. I would never do

that. Coincidentally, put some money into this bag so I can go off and ‘not’

support my opium habit with it. Also, compared to me, you’re all nothing

but ants.” Basically, this new level of hypocrisy- Original

 Discovering that the Church has fed people this crock of shit for two

thousand years and somehow managed to keep the fact that nearly every

good word is plagiarized and almost every bad one is original a secret-

Priceless.

Interesting, isn’t it? Although, that’s simply Jesus according to the apostles.

Jesus may very possibly have been a good man who meant well, but he decided to entrust his legacy to a group of idiots who may or may not have been mentally addled (discussed later, in Book Three) and screwed up the history because they couldn’t distinguish truth from lies. Perhaps the apostles had personal agendas...

Hey, wasn’t Peter made a Pope? 1

Of course, the chance is equally as likely that Jesus actually did say those horrible, horrible things. So, like the God question, we have the Jesus question- was he good, or was he bad- and the basic probability sits at fifty percent on

1 No.

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each side. I don’t mean this Jesus spoken of in the Bible so frequently- I mean the actual Jesus, who actually lived. Did he claim to be a god incarnate and here to ‘save men’s souls,’ or was he just a poor man whose reputation was ruined by libel from four fools who sought to use his name to further themselves?

Although, unlike the Jesus question, the Church question is a no-brainer- is the church good, or is the church bad- the probability is zero to one hundred, respectively. You can have a feeling of religious fulfillment without believing false history and stolen facts and stories. Were the apostles liars? Again, the chance is an absolute one-hundred percent. It was either purely intentional, or they were completely inebriated everywhere they went, and each one of them actually did see reality so very differently as to remembering different fundamental facts.

One cannot be so drunk as to remember things that differently- if you’re that drunk, you don’t remember anything at all. Perhaps there is a flowering plant that grows around the Middle East and other areas that causes severe distortions of reality, perception and commonly makes you believe that the world has hurt you if you use it in heavy doses, particularly smoking or eating it, which, if true, would explain both Jesus’ lung cancer and odd worldview very snugly. However, calling yourself holy whilst not mentioning your mind-boggling opium addiction is called a ‘lie of omission.’

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Regardless, the loose association of people who believed the words of four straight out liars/heavy users of the above mentioned plant were commonly and routinely persecuted for believing the way they did. Zoroastrian law does clearly state to kill heretics, and the Roman government became very cross (hah, what a pun) that the Christians were speaking out against them, so they came in and destroyed Israel1 for not silencing the heretics, like the Zoroastrians. So, thus came the second and longest separation of the Jews- the Diaspora, lasting approximately 1900 years, in total. Yet again, the Jews fled, were enslaved or killed en masse2. They seem to be very unlucky in that regard.

Or, perhaps another theory that seems to be supported by history- Nero3 just didn’t like Christians. Perhaps it is because Jesus claimed to be god, and in the

Roman Empire you are supposed to consider your Caesar a god. Who knows why, but we can be sure of this- he did hate them, and he killed them for fun. He made sport of turning Christians on their heads (literally, while on crosses, while on fire4) and he is the one who ordered the destruction of Jerusalem, which the

1 Although, ever since it had first been subjected to Roman rule, Israel was a very unruly province, frequently fostering revolts against the Roman government, and so on. A notable incident is the fact that Vespasian Caesar’s son Titus (who had the exact same first, middle and last name as his father) leveled the rebuilt temple of Solomon exactly 656 years to the day after the first destruction of the temple. It’s another 6*6 date. 2 En masse is used as a relative term here- the numbers do not constitute a genocide, nor was the act of destroying Israel intended as a genocide- just a subjugation of a rebellious province (if that sounds any better). As a matter of fact, a large portion of the casualties suffered during the Roman invasion of Israel were from soldiers committing suicide, either out of fear of slavery, feeling that they had failed God, or that God had failed them. 3 Nero is one of those odd historical figures that both disgusts and intrigues me. He fancied himself a thespian, and his last words before stabbing himself to death in the face of an impending coup were: “What an artist dies in me.” 4 You have to set them on fire, or else they won’t die very quickly. If you crucify a man and then turn the cross upside down, then they will be able to breathe. Sure, the blood rushing to their heads would eventually kill them, but apparently Nero wasn’t very patient.

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future-Caesar Titus begrudgingly obliged to. Thus, this is the first of many examples of the Hebrew being the victims of genocide due to Christianity, whether it be indirect or direct.

However, at the time of Nero’s death, the campaign paused, but when Titus’ father assumed the throne, he also begrudgingly re-issued the order to sack

Jerusalem, perhaps because a half-finished invasion would only spur on more revolts. Titus successfully besieged and subsequently destroyed Jerusalem, scattering the Hebrew people across the globe. A historian named Philostratus says that Titus refused to accept a crown from neighboring countries (likely the

Parthians, at this point only about 600 years from abandoning Zoroastrianism for

Islam, subsequently plunging the area into a Dark Age that has yet to end) because he had simply done the work of the gods in his view (both Nero and his father were considered gods in Roman culture). Some quote him as saying

“There is no merit in vanquishing a people abandoned by their own god” instead.

From this period came a technique known as the blood libel- coincidentally, the original blood libel was not a libel at all, but a simple misunderstanding. Since

Nero, the general feeling towards Christians was a very negative one, so the common folk were vigilantly looking for a fault in Christianity that they could expose- and they found one very quickly. The practice of transubstantiation (wine actually turns to the blood of Jesus through some ‘magical process’) was understandably mistaken by some Romans to mean that the Christians were

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drinking blood during communion,1 but everyone wondered where they got the blood from. Hysteric citizens came up with an answer- from the malformed infants that the Romans disposed of outside of the city. So, common portrayals of

Christians by the Roman Empire (up until Constantine) contained the image of

Christians killing babies and drinking their blood. After Constantine, the Church as a whole frequently used the blood libel (which actually was a libel, at this point) against their enemies up until very recently, including but not limited to:

Jews, Pagans, Muslims, American Indians, Satanists, Witches and Atheists.

At least the very first blood libel wasn’t even really a libel, but the ones later in the list are completely baseless and fueled entirely by hysteria and stupidity. Why, it’s just like the Church as a whole! Too bad the church isn’t a very understanding organization- they commonly used the blood libel against their enemies with no base at all, and not once did it occur to anyone ‘Hey, this happened to us too, and it sucked. Maybe we shouldn’t do this.’ Since that thought didn’t occur, that makes the Church an organization that is sadistic in nature, consisting of members who are masochistic in nature, thereby making the entire complex sadomasochistic. Thusly, no matter if pain falls on others or themselves, the

Church and its members take pleasure in it. So, thus, what is the ultimate

Christian ideal? Cause pain. Lots and lots of pain. It doesn’t matter who receives, just so long as someone does receive it. ‘Be like Jesus, he took the pain for us, he suffered when he didn’t have to!’

1 I speculate this may have been the beginning of the idea of vampirism, as well.

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I don’t suppose the church will take kindly to exposing that festering putridity they call a ‘core belief.’ Oh, well. I would like to take a moment to thank the American founding fathers for giving me the First Amendment right to Free Speech to expose things like this. I’m sure that when I was using my First Amendment rights against Scientology in the first book, Church officials were probably thinking ‘Thank God for that.’ Now that I’ve turned the tables, I’m sure they’re thinking something that is most likely just a random string of expletives.

You have to make fun of everyone equally, right? If you truly are a skeptic, you must challenge every point made in history. You must question everything you are told. You must make sense of events, and when they do not make sense as they are presented to you, you must present a course of action that seems logical; for that’s all you can do, the true history has been lost. In the cases of other religions, the history lines up very well with legend (even the Hindu stories, amazingly enough, which I thought were entirely metaphorical until I did further research on them).

At this point I assume most of you have noticed that I give undue weight to one side of the argument presented by history- the side that says ‘This is all just a story, and the ones who wrote a historical fiction and called it completely true created an organization that has been a detriment to society as a whole since it was first conceived of.’ Sorry, I’m just being fair and balanced- throwing such weight on that side of the scale to counteract the nauseating portrayal by so-

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called secular history that ‘This actually happened, damn it, and the church is a perfectly fine organization without any kind of corruption based upon events that without any margin of error definitely occurred, and no opium was involved.’

Perhaps you could call it beating a dead horse- ‘Yeah, we get it, it’s just a story, and the church is based on a lie created to steal ten percent of the income of the common man.’ People might say that, and yet this very same infinitely1 corrupt institution has a two-billion strong following. Not to mention, it’s not like the string of lies and corruption just ends there. Not at all- the deception has continued up until this very moment, across a staggering two-thousand years.

I feel just as bad having to write this as I’m sure you do having to read it. It’s like taking the weakest argument ever devised and just utterly destroying it with basic sense. It feels like between the two arguments of ‘This is just a story’ and ‘This actually happened, damn it’ there are two competitors in a fight- On the side of reason, logic, history and ethics is a three-hundred pound bodybuilder and professional boxer, nothing but muscle. On the side of superstition, fear, stupidity and deception, there’s a quadriplegic ninety-year old man with a calcium deficiency, a malignant tumor, and currently suffering a mild heart attack. It’s a bloodbath.

1 In English, the term ‘infinite’ has taken on the connotative definition of ‘endless.’ I am using it here in the literal meaning, ‘not measureable.’

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Not to mention, what has Christianity ever done to deserve the respect of being innocuous? Nothing, unless you consider having a large following that is very easily roused to anger a good thing; another logical fallacy called argumentum ad baculum- argument by force.1 What has it done to deserve disrespect? The largest section in the next book is devoted to just that. But, after this temporary pause, I feel as though we must move on.

Things persisted as they had with Nero for hundreds of years after his death.

However, things all changed radically with the conversion of the Roman Caesar

Constantine2 who began to rule in 306 AD. It really is amazing how quickly things changed- suddenly, the Christians weren’t the underdogs anymore, and they weren’t suffering for their beliefs! Well, something was going to have to change; you can’t get pleasure without pain if you’re a masochist.

In the year of 325 AD, the various forces of Christianity convened in a council known as the Council of Nicaea, wherefrom comes the “Nicene Creed.”

Basically, this established the laws and rites that would eventually give rise to

Catholicism. The various tenets of the Nicene Creed already showed what sort of religion Christianity was shaping up to be, with such rules as: No self-castration, no ridiculous charging of tithes or loans to common folk, prohibition of young women to work in the house of a priest (later replaced by altar boys), and several

1 Do remember while you’re composing your hate mail that Jesus said “Turn the other cheek.” 2 At this point, the Roman Empire was split (a schism) between the East and the West parts. He was the emperor of the Western one. His reign marked ‘religious tolerance,’ not quite officializing Christianity as the state religion as many think. I say ‘religious tolerance’ in apostrophes because it marked the rise of Christianity through the discrimination against the pagans. Hurrah for sadism.

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laws that established common ideas in Christianity, such as the date of Easter and other things that much of the Christian community probably thinks came from the Bible itself instead of a convening of bishops.

There were several differing schools of thought that came formed up in this convention, most of them from metropolitan areas in the Roman Empire.

Strangely enough, most of these schools of thought “magically disappeared” about the time the Catholic Church came to power in a time that is quite aptly named: The European Dark Ages.

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II:IV- The Dark Ages

“I want it all to burn.

This guilt is all seeing,

Carrying you home to the shore.

I will use you until the end.”

-Mouth of the Architect, Guilt and the Like

The Western Roman Empire collapsed in 476, due to constant attacks from the violent German1 barbarians overthrowing this ‘great and powerful’ empire that had ‘somehow’ been in decline for a century or so. What a wonderful parallel to the Achaemenid Empire- just replace corrupted Zoroastrianism with Christianity2, and Alexander with barbarians, and it’s the same story. George Santayana’s words ring true still.

At the very least, this ‘evil empire’ that assisted in deicide ended up spreading

Christianity to the Iberian Peninsula, England, Italy, Greece, and so many other places.

Due to the particular way that Theodosius incorporated Christianity as a religion, the simple name “Christian” regardless of practices earned you the right to tax

1 I would like to state that for the record, I am all-American mutt comprised of indeterminate amounts of German, Dutch, Russian, Swedish and Jewish ancestry. Apparently I am also descended from the multi-national European Royal family. At least I’m not a hemophiliac, right? 2 For the record, ‘corrupted Zoroastrianism’ is a synonym for Christianity, and ‘even further corrupted Zoroastrianism’ is a synonym for Islam.

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breaks and all sorts of cushy perks. Unsurprisingly, Catholicism, the single most damning and wisdom-hating among the little branches that claimed to have the

‘correct’ interpretation of Jesus’ life, was the one chosen during the Dark Ages due to preying on the fear and cowardice of the lower class. The Catholic church immediately set out exterminating all other forms of thought contrary to their own, particularly in Christianity (“Love thy neighbour” seems to be a foreign phrase to the Church) for being ‘heresies.’ One particular group they exterminated were called the Gnostics, a group of scholars who kept many books of the Apocrypha that the Catholic Church tactfully omitted because it spelled out that their actions and very existence were sins against nature. Yet again, the church, not being particularly creative, defended their actions with the threat of hellfire; “If you disagree with our way of doing things, God will send you to hell.” History tells us that there were dozens of Christian sects after the death of Jesus, and yet only fifty years after Catholicism came to power there was only one left, and all the others ‘mysteriously vanished.’

Allowing Catholicism to run rampant was perhaps a fault of the Roman

Emperors, perhaps fault of their fellow Christians. At first Catholicism was benign, but later it mutated into a malignant tumor upon the Roman Empire and the pursuit of knowledge itself. The Church oversaw the destruction of several works of literature and schools of logic they considered ‘heresies.’ Among them are several books of the Apocrypha, known only to exist through mention in letters between Biblical scholars- mainly Gnostics, but a few others in there as

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well. The church also began to execute homosexuals during this period, despite the fact that the Augustus Caesar, the first Emperor of the Roman Empire, and many other prominent leaders after him were openly bisexual.

So, the fall of the Western Roman Empire is the traditional start date for a time period in which the Catholic Church dominated politics, religion, education, and pretty much every aspect of life. This period of time is called the Dark Ages1.

Ironic, isn’t it- the church is supposed to be the light of Jesus, and yet it’s called the Dark Ages. It’s also surprising how much modern Christian sentiment is still derived from the practices of the Dark Ages, Catholic and Protestant alike.

Regardless, the Dark Ages are marked by a profound level of stupidity in the common man due to the Church controlling all forms of learning material, a very tiny amount of art, music, or accurate history, a stunted sense of culture, and an incredible amount of violence started on religious pretense, not seen for a thousand years; the entire continent of Europe regressed into an odd form of tribalism we have not yet seen in history, one where the shaman says ‘Obey me, or you’re going to hell.’

1 However, ‘Dark Ages’ is not a politically correct term to describe this period- some prefer ‘That thousand years of history wasted between the collapse of the Roman Empire and the Renaissance.’ Apparently, referring to the time when the Catholic Church was at the peak of its power and routinely threatened people with excommunication and was absolutely bursting at the seams with corruption as the Dark Ages is offensive to Catholics. Who would have thought?

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Things weren’t going too well in Arabia, either- another ‘final prophet of god,’

Muhammad1, had received some magical revelation from his god, Allah, and he named the practice of it Islam (meaning ‘Submission’). Why, this religion of his was fantastic- it extolled such virtues as obeying orders without thinking about them, falling prostrate (that’s a common word in my copy of the Qur’an) before

Allah and worshipping him no matter how much he makes you suffer, because he’s all-powerful. Hey, haven’t we heard that before?

Muhammad himself is a spectacular fellow- according to his own story, his great grandfather was Ishmael2, who supposedly lived sometime around 1500 BC.

Thus, if Muhammad was born in 570 AD, either time travel was involved or his ancestors lived to be older than 600 years on average. Perhaps his old age had made him self-conscious, because he forbade any drawings be made of him or

Allah. If you draw pictures of either of them, you will have a bounty put on your head. This isn’t 6th century I’m talking about, either. This is the 21st century.

However, unlike Jesus, we do have historical documentation for Muhammad- and let me tell you, it’s another one of those cult stories. He perverts the truth so ravenously to fulfill perceived ‘prophecy’; but I suppose I should let you decide for

1 If my Qur’an and understanding of Arabic is correct, Muhammad’s full name translates in English from “Muhammad Ibn Abd Allah” to “Praised, son to Slave of God.” Not important, but a nice sidenote. 2 This would make his Father’s name “Abd Allah Ibn Muttalib Ibn Ishmael.” It isn’t, though. Funny, that. I find the naming in Arabia at that time fascinating. Apparently the one who raised the child is the one who passes on their name after “Ibn,” genetics aside.

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yourself. Muhammad (himself, not his followers) claimed to be the next ‘messiah’ that Jesus spoke of in the Bible.

Now, here’s Islamic legend:

Muhammad is the law-bearer, the last prophet. He has come to save humanity and restore uncorrupted monotheism (wait, this isn’t Zoroastrianism!). So,

Muhammad was born in Mecca six months after his father died, and he was sent off to live with a foster-family of desert folk, and then his mother died. Then he was sent to live with his grandfather, and he died as well (this kid kills everything he touches- just like his religion!) so he was sent off to live with an uncle, who didn’t die as quickly as the rest of the family did. Even in the Islamic version of the story, Muhammad crafts his theology based upon a meeting with a Christian monk named Bahira (and in the book that Muhammad wrote, he said that Bahira said he would be a prophet).

So, eventually Muhammad followed in the footsteps of his death-resistant uncle and became a merchant. He rose to a middle-ish level of affluence in his town, and a forty-year old widow named Khadijah threw herself at him. So, he accepted, and they were happily married.

Now, yet again we have a story involving a rock formation, the number forty, and revelation by a divine source. This story was only mildly interesting the first time it

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was told by Zarathustra, and now that we’re on the third retelling it’s gotten quite old. Regardless, Muhammad started going to a cave near Mecca to receive

‘revelations’ from the angel Gabriel (just like the Indian Angel, but that was much later) which were accompanied by seizures.

Unlike Jesus, I cannot give an accurate description of the illness that plagued

Muhammad’s mind since seizures are such a vague diagnostic tool (as opposed to an effusion) and it could be many things, but luckily for me another physician has taken on the burden of diagnosing this one quite a while ago. Dr. Frank R.

Freemon wrote a paper in 1976 titled A Differential Diagnosis of the Inspirational

Spells of Muhammad the Prophet of Islam, which was published in the Journal of

Epilepsia. Although he admittedly can’t pinpoint the diagnosis beyond absolutely any shadow of a doubt, he believes that by far the most accurate diagnosis is

Temporal Lobe Epilepsy. Looking at the effects of TLE, I can’t help but feel convinced.

 Hyperreligiousity

 Moral preoccupations

 Pedanticism- either flaunting your knowledge, or ‘making up knowledge’

(e.g., lying) with which to flaunt.

 Increased emotional response

 Fainting spells

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One qualm with this theory (perhaps the only logical one) is that this particular type of epilepsy over the long-term causes physical and mental degradation, especially as often as Muhammad’s seizures have occurred. I have two problems with this qualm- firstly, Muhammad very obviously became markedly more wrathful, capricious, violent, and just outright insane as his life went on- therefore, that degradation that some people claim ‘isn’t there.’ Secondly, every single time that Muhammad woke up from a seizure he ‘magically’ had a revelation. Being that some people can use their epileptic fits to inspire themselves, that seems plausible. However, not even the most gifted epileptic is inspired every time they have an episode, which leads me to speculate that

Muhammad faked some (perhaps even most) of his seizures to give his words

‘divine weight.’ I would say that is supported by how Muhammad magically received revelations that saved him from various mistakes he made in his judgment.

I’m also entirely sure that Muhammad was aware of his retardation unless he thought that falling and knocking his head on the floor from seizures was some kind of ‘good thing.’ He knew very well that there was something that other people had that he didn’t; control over their emotions and the ‘blessing’ to not seize up randomly. My point is this- while he was crafting Islam in the darkest recesses of his mind, he knew very well he was not holy or blessed by god. He knew very well that he actually was an inferior specimen compared to his fellow man. However, his chat with Bahira made him realize something; his suffering

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made him better (as untrue as that actually is), and using Christian logic he could twist the truth enough to make himself seem holy. He knew very well that what he was doing was wrong, and he did it anyway. At least the Apostles can claim the ‘insanity/intoxication’ defense.

Thanks to Bahira, Muhammad had enough material in order to hobble together a haphazard conglomerate of Christianity and his own insanity, and unsurprisingly the upper and middle classes laughed at his stupidity. However, much like

Christianity, Islam spread like a pandemic among the lower class because

Muhammad taught the same word- suffering makes you better.

Muhammad quickly struck a nerve with the population of his hometown of Mecca by condemning their religion with a series of verses apparent in the Qur’an he was composing at the time. Islam, as I said earlier, spread like a virus, so

Muhammad and his followers quickly posed a formidable threat against the in- place polytheistic religion called Ka’aba, so it is said that many of the powerful merchants in town offered him a position of wealth where he would be more likely to marry highly in the community he lived in. However, it is said that he refused; why settle? When your brainchild of religion is spreading like wildfire and you could soon raise an army to conquer and basically have as many wives1 as you please (and he did; my information says that he had thirteen), why should you stop there?

1 He took a girl named Aisha to be his wife at the age of six and consummated their relationship at the age of nine, if that tells you anything about his character.

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The funny thing is that his family were the guardians of the Ka’aba religion; he went against his own blood to save what he perceived as the ‘right’ religion, much like Zarathustra, Buddha and Jesus before him. While I may not much care for Muhammad, I must admire that he was able to accomplish a feat of basically severing ties with his immediate family. That takes gumption.

However, there’s also the story of the “Satanic verses.1” In Islamic legend, this is referred to as the “Story of Cranes.” Muhammad, contrary to what he had been preaching up to that point, spread word that the angel Gabriel had come to him and told him that Allah had begotten three daughters; goddesses. Basically, despite his word that Allah was the one and only god, he was saying that there was more than one powerful deity! Naturally, once he was regained of his senses he said “Wait a second, I didn’t mean that. It was Satan. Yeah, it was totally

Satan who said that to me. My bad, dudes.”

Well, as we have established that Muhammad was slowly losing his grip on reality at this point, we have yet another incident that would seem to suggest his

TLE was clouding his judgment and causing problems; he had severe hallucinations one night, referred to in Islamic legend as The Isra and Mi’raj. In this fantastic story of events which I assume the movie The Neverending Story

1 I assume this is where the author Salman Rushdie got the title for his book in which he explores various flaws in Islam. Unsurprisingly, a bounty was put on his head for doing so. Way to play into his hand, radical Islam. On an unrelated note, other (translated) names for Satan in Arabic are Shaytan (Satan) and Iblis (Lucifer).

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was based off of, Muhammad was taken away in a chariot by the angel Gabriel and shown some real cool stuff. This stuff was super-groovy, such as a far away mosque (which was probably a Jewish temple?), a visit to heaven and hell, and some idle conversation with figures such as Abraham, Moses, and Jesus. I assume they sat around and smoked a few fat blunts or some such.1 So, stoned off his ass, the angel Gabriel returned him back home (and he woke up on the floor!)

So, anyway, in the year 619, Muhammad’s wife and uncle both died. This is called “The Year of Sorrow” in Muslim tradition, and due to the fact that his uncle was dead, his family’s protection2 was withdrawn from him and he tried to flee the city of Mecca. He visited the city of Ta’if (also in Arabia), but ended up messing up oncemore and placing himself in harm’s way again. So, anyhoo, he ended up going back home to Mecca due to protection being offered to him by a kind

Samaritan. Well, not really a Samaritan. I’m just using a phrase here.

However, this return to his home city was short lived; in 622, Muhammad was warned of an assassination plot against him and as such gathered all of his followers and fled to the city of Medina. Muhammad had been instructing his followers to flee from Mecca to Medina for quite some time, but only once he was made aware of the attempt on his life by an assassin did he actually leave,

1 I figure a joke here and there doesn’t hurt anything in such a far-fetched story. 2 In the culture at the time, a clan’s protection being withdrawn from you was basically saying that you were fair game to kill/assault/steal from without any recourse from the community as whole, because there would be no blood-price paid for those who transgressed against you.

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bringing the rest of his followers with him. In Islam, this event is called the hijra, yet another holy day observed by Muslims.

Muhammad was apparently accepted into the community of Medina as a lawbringer due to the precedent his followers had set for him; namely, they did not take part in the tribal conflicts that tore the city apart with its antiquated laws that were not far removed from Hammurabi’s Code. As such, Muhammad gave

Islamic law to the area and basically had reign over the city.

During this period came the event that likely caused Muhammad and his subsequent followers (even to the modern day) to dislike the Hebrew people; they shunned Muhammad’s Islamic law and preferred the Law of Moses, refusing to submit to Muhammad’s rule because he was not of the tribe of David, effectively making his decrees as a lawmaker moot in their eyes.

Not that it particularly mattered. While the Jews may have been a very serious and important factor in Medina, they were stalwart in their dedication to Judaism.

However, much like it did in Mecca, Islam spread like the plague amongst the poor and refugee population of Medina. Once Muhammad had attained enough followers, he set out to conquer Mecca and return to his home city. This began with attacks that were small, but gradually grew stronger until there had been bona fide battles and prisoners taken, which, conveniently enough, Gabriel sent

Muhammad messages as to what to do with them. How convenient.

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However, the victory was short lived. The military conflict with Mecca intensified, and the Meccans eventually sent an actual army to attack Medina. Being the brilliant military leader that he was, Muhammad sent his forces against a camp of

Meccans on a mountain laced with archers. Naturally, the Muslim forces lost this one quite badly, and once again, Muhammad delivered Quranic verses blaming his troops’ lack of faith for their defeat. The Meccans marched onwards, laying siege to Medina, and only through the luck of a converted Persian engineer who taught the Muslims to dig trenches at significant points of entry to the town, did the Muslims defeat the Meccans in this most crucial hour.

Apparently a group of Jews had rebelled against Muhammad and committed what we would consider a legitimate act of treachery, and they were thusly given the choice: Convert to Islam or die. Unsurprisingly, many of the Hebrew chose to die rather than change their beliefs to this corruption of their faith. Also unsurprisingly, the women and children whose husbands/brothers died were enslaved. As with many cases in Islam, they were used as objects of… perverse desire.

After this, Muhammad commanded his followers to make a pilgrimage back to

Mecca, showing the beginnings of what we’d call ‘mental degradation,’ since those pilgrims were at serious risk and were likely not trained fighters, and if the

Meccans had caught them and they were all slaughtered, it would be a massive

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blow to Islam and it might have crumbled as whole. However, due to

Muhammad’s prowess in terms of military decisions, he evaded a party of cavalry that were sent to kill him and his followers by taking a more difficult route than the one directly into the city. He and his followers made it to the city, and, surprisingly enough, the Meccans did not have Muhammad immediately executed for inciting war against them. It actually ended up with the Muslims and the Meccans signing a treaty for cessation of hostilities.

Given Muhammad’s apparent knack for all things war-like, he soon thereafter attacked a Jewish oasis town named Khaybar. Their siege of said town granted them a good amount of wealth and fame for defeating a force of Jews five times their number. However, it does show that Muhammad was beginning to flip back and forth between his laws; several of his soldiers were suffering from hunger, so they killed and ate several forbidden animals (at the time), but Muhammad stated they were exempt from the rule because of necessity. Just like killing someone else might be necessary to survive like in that Saw movie, right? I’m sure there would be no recourse for such an action, from either Allah or the police

(respectively).

Anyhow, said treaty I mentioned above crumbled after a couple of years of enforcement due to just plain ol’ falling out of diplomacy. The treaty was annulled through a messenger of Muhammad’s, and soon after the fool who annulled it realized his mistake. He tried to re-negotiate with Muhammad, but Muhammad

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would hear none of it. Much as the fool had likely predicted, Muhammad conquered the city with crushing military force with very few casualties on his end. He subsequently set his military force on the town, destroying much (if not all) of the art contained therewithin, leaving only a building called the ‘Kaaba1’ which was sacred to the invading Muslims. Basically all the remainder in the town of Mecca who did not die for their faith converted to Islam.

You’d think that would be the end of it, but no. Apparently, the way that historians tell it, the armies in the regions of Arabia around Mecca and Medina were all allying against the Muslims because of various reasons, many of them being dependent on the way that the prestige of Mecca had mysteriously ‘declined’ over the past few years. Maybe it’s that good ol’ heathen religion which spread throughout the city, eh?

Regardless, the enemies of the now pretty much completely Meccans raised armies against them, and Muhammad as such set about destroying their armies, invading their towns and killing all those would not convert to Islam as was his general pattern. Throughout his entire life this pattern repeated itself several times, and after his death it would repeat several more times. It’s actually going on right now; the radical Islamic are attempting to spread Islam to India in place of the already-established Hinduism.

1 This is the point in Mecca that all Muslims are supposed to face while praying. The Kaaba has been destroyed and rebuilt many times, I’m not sure why the Muslims still consider it ‘holy.’ Not like it was crafted out of obsidian or anything…

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Regardless, in the years before his death in a lull of military conquest and virulently spreading Islam, Muhammad established the great pilgrimage of the

Muslims known as the Hajj, where Muslims from across the world make a pilgrimage to Mecca and walk counterclockwise around the Kaaba seven times.

This is apparently one of the five ‘Pillars of Islam,’ the other four being acceptance of Muhammad as Allah’s messenger, charity in the form of alms, facing the Kaaba during prayer five times daily, and fasting during the daylight in the month of Ramadan.

Now, as I understand it, unlike Christianity, there is some leniency in the way you are supposed to practice the five pillars. For example, if you are incapable of making the pilgrimage to Mecca and walking counterclockwise seven times around the Kaaba, it is forgivable and not necessarily a bar from salvation. You also do not have to necessarily give a flat tax of your income to the Islamic community (comparable to “The Church” in Christianity) if you are destitute and need that money, you may also perform acts of kindness in lieu of actual monetary giving. I’m not sure where this leaves those who do donate money, but

I’ll assume it’s the same traditional values of most religions that you’re supposed to treat your fellow man as at least semi-equal.

This philosophy, while it may sound just peachy in theory, is one that is not heavily enforced by the Islamic community as a whole. When observed in

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society, it is noted that many prominent Muslims will build mosques and solely donate to the causes that are pro-Islamic versus noble causes that are secular.

Muhammad’s death was not something spectacular like Jesus or Zarathustra; he went out like Buddha Gautama, minus the possibility of being poisoned, or so it would seem; he succumbed to a seemingly garden-variety disease at the age of sixty-three. He died in Medina in the house of one of his wives and was subsequently buried there, a naturally sacred site to many Muslims.

It did not take long for Islam to spread across the old world; the Zoroastrian

Persians fell before the ferocity of the Muslims, as did the northern African societies. It was not too long after the 7th century rolled around that Islam had filled the power vacuum that it had created by destroying the Persian Empire.

With Muhammad to keep his followers in check (speaking loosely), Islam had been confined to the Arabian Peninsula, but when he died his followers went into a war frenzy and spread like a virus across much of the Old World, attempting at first only to spread to areas where war was an inevitability, but later spreading

Islam by force across much of the territory of the Sassinid (Persian) Empire, going so far as to even conquer nearly everything that Alexander the Great had conquered back in his day, and the Muslims even ended up conquering more

(speaking purely in terms of landmass; the Muslims never quite got India like

Alexander did in that century and a half).

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Given the propensity the Muslims had for exterminating the heretical religions and killing the infidels, many Zoroastrians died at the hands of Islam, and as such we have what you might call the ‘Zoroastrian Diaspora,’ where Zoroastrians fled their empire to various other countries where they thought they could find shelter, India being prominent among them. Much like Alexander, the invading

Muslims destroyed many parts of the Avesta and made them practically beyond recovery. At this point, our modern perceptions of the Avesta had been established in Persia and other countries beyond the reach of the empire but still followed the Zoroastrian way, but they were all invaded by the various forces of

Islam and subsequently crushed and suppressed by any means that the Muslims saw fit. This ranged from simple ostracizing from the community all the way to executing them for heresy. Oh, how the tables have turned. It used to be that

Zoroastrians executed heretics for attempting to corrupt their religion, yet outside their reach there most certainly was one corrupting it, and he twisted it enough that it would be their downfall, much like Zarathustra likely saw approximately two-thousand years beforehand. This may not have been genocide per se, but it was a near-total extermination of a religion. Let’s call it “religicide.”

This is pattern that repeated itself over and over when Islam entered a region, be it a pagan religion or an organized one; Muslims wiped out their religion and replaced it with Islam. There seems to be a lack of respect for indigenous culture even greater than that in Christianity. I shudder to think what would happen if the

Muslims were the first to find the New World.

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Speaking of Christianity, Muslims seemed to treat Christians as semi-equal at this point. Why they did is beyond me, especially because the Church at the time used the rise of Islam as a fear-mongering tactic and other things, like illegalizing several substances that were frowned upon such as marijuana and opium.

Like earlier, I’ll gloss over a few hundred years where only a few things of significance occurred, such as the rise of Shinto in Japan, several more Christian councils, bickering amongst the Islamic, so on and so forth. I hear tell that the

Mayan civilization was nearing its peak at this point, however, I do not have the means to discern exactly when the peak was or what their religious practices were at that point; the means barely exist to tell what they were doing when they were (nearly) exterminated by the Europeans.

Anyhow, fast-forwarding to about the middle of the Dark Ages, we have the

“Great Schism” between the branches of Christianity (i.e. Catholicism and

Eastern Orthodox) in 1054 AD, effectively cutting the mobilization potential of the church in half. As such, the Islamic became increasingly more aggressive and even went so far as to attack Constantinople (the seat of the Eastern Roman

Empire at the time) and they threw out a cry for help to the Catholic Church. The

Church heard their cry, but if you ever played that game called ‘telephone’ where you whisper something to the person next to you through twelve people and it gets to the last person and the message is completely different, that’s about what

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happened here. The Catholic church instead sent forces to Jerusalem and attacked the Muslim and Jewish populations residing there. There were a series of crusades following this original one, nine or ten in total depending on who you listen to, but the subjects of what happened on the crusades are covered in the next book.

Unfortunately, the spawn of new religions of any importance seems to come to a close after Islam and the development of the Catholic Church as a superpower in

European culture. There were certain events worth mentioning, such as the witch hunts, but yet again those are covered in the next book, along with the Aztec,

Mayan, Inca and North American Indian genocides.

So, reader, I’m afraid I must conclude this section approximately 1,000 years before the present due to not much happening, quite honestly.

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Book III- Grievances of Religion

If you’re a religious leader, I’d skip over this section if I were you. Seriously.

III:I- Grievances of The God of the Jews

“If you have a cross to bear,

It’s only fair

That you use it as a crutch.”

-Moloko, If You Have A Cross To Bear…

I use the ‘God of the Jews’ to describe in the deity worshipped by Christians,

Muslims and Hebrew (Jehovah, Allah, and Yahweh, respectively.) They may call him by different names, but they all acknowledge that he is the same that the others worship. I would like to state before this section begins in earnest, I am only using the descriptor ‘God of the Jews’ because it is the most apt, in my opinion, not because of some bias against Hebrew folk. I am indeed sorry for having to defame the Hebrew along with the Christians, for they have been bothered quite enough across history, and at the very least they keep their religion to themselves; but Christianity bases itself on Hebrew teachings, and if I am to invalidate Christianity I must invalidate the Hebrew system of beliefs as well1. Then again, just reading the atrocities against ethics- not objective

1 Although, keep in mind, simply by numbers of faith the Christians outnumber the Hebrew a neat 100 to 1. So, if you are Hebrew and you feel as though I am unfair, just think of those 100 Christians who aren’t going to be hassling you to convert anymore.

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morality, core ethics- in the Old Testament, particularly Genesis, Exodus and

Deuteronomy should be enough to prove my point. It is very, very sad that I have to go any deeper into this.

Now, in this book, I could just quote several numbers at you, add in the lack of historical documentation, speculation, and plain logic to disprove these holy books1, but what is the fun in that? There’s always some fundamentalist ‘fudging’ an equation so that it will come out even slightly plausible under the most bizarre conditions. I wonder why it is so hard to admit that it might ‘just be a story.’

I play their game- I use the stories and scripture that they believe against them, because some Christians are to the point of shutting out all logic and reason if it disproves what they believe. In order to disprove what I say, you have to disbelieve every bit of scripture I quote and every point I make using scriptural evidence- how fun! The way I play the game, I win no matter what happens.

Either you come to view my side as correct, or in order to disprove what I say you have to invalidate your own system of beliefs, leaving you with nothing.

I find the notion of believing in infallibility of the Bible absurd. That’s like me forming a religion out of J. K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series. It’s a work of fiction, and taken as a work of fiction it can be a good thing in practice. Who knows, perhaps I will start getting letters from people who believe that Harry Potter is real as well (raised Christian, no doubt).

1 If this sounds like fun, then The God Delusion is the book for you.

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Looking back in history, what do Christianity and Islam have in common?

Hallucination. The idea that a man would hear the voice of god and perform miracles with small amounts of witnesses. I’m sure there were digressers, and this idea is indeed very disturbing to those who are heavily invested in any of these religions. The reason that these ‘prophets’ heard the ‘voice of god’ was that they ingested opium, which, though naturally originating in the Indo-China region, was very common in the Middle East. Every single early monotheistic religion in the Old World formed around the area where poppies (and thus, opium) grow. Of course, opium in and of itself does not cause such intense hallucinations that it would result in one hearing the voice of a god. But, it certainly does lead one down the path that eventually will end in madness if it does not stop.

Now, I have nothing but the utmost respect for the Jews. They are a hardy people- threatened with extinction countless times, and they always come through fairly unscathed. They have escaped their slavery, survived separation, the Holocaust, and the hatred of the countries around them up to even this day.

My criticisms are mostly based upon the bickering offspring of Judaism- The self- righteous Christians, and the self-destructive Islamic. My point is this- the Jews need their opiate to dull their pain.

I discovered an interesting idea about perception a while ago; that Christianity is simply Zoroastrianism seen through the eyes of a horribly addicted opium user.

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Zoroastrianism itself is not quite so impartial- the Avesta mentions a drink named

Haoma, called Soma by Hindus, an entire book of the Rig Veda dedicated to its praise, and a good part of the Avesta as well. It would not be so out of the question to speculate that Zoroastrianism and Hinduism are based upon perceptions cultivated from Soma the same way that Christianity is based upon the sensations of opium: Jesus is your painkiller; Zarathustra is your window to enlightenment. However, seeing these two very different ideas through such radically different windows of thought can be very… perverse.

It is the idea behind Christianity, much like constant abuse of painkillers that sickens me; my mindset is that you should cure the misery that plagues the mind instead of constantly and frequently deadening it, if at all possible. However, curing the underlying cause eliminates the need for deadening, because there is no pain to treat in the first place. The masochism of Christians comes in play here, as well; they cause themselves pain in order to deaden it, to make it seem justified. It sounds very stupid and so very simple; the concept was always so very plain and easy to understand, and for thousands of years prior to the founding of the church that was the way that everyone not addicted to opium thought.

As I hope I have made painfully clear in the previous book, Christianity is wholly a ‘religion of pieces’ much like Islam, and most of their ideas are directly plagiarized from Zoroastrianism (in Islam’s case, even if you steal from a thief

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you still have the property of the original owner). Now, let me indulge you in a metaphor.

Let’s say that Phil makes statues. Phil makes great statues. Phil plans out his statues, and keeps the record of the development of his statues, his failed statues and prototypes. Now, Phil has a neighbor named Bill. Bill wants to make statues, but he is absolutely horrid at it. Bill kind of sucks at everything, and his life would be best described by the phrase ‘epic fail.’ He wants people to think that he’s important, that he’s talented, like Phil. So, Bill goes over and steals

Phil’s statue. While he’s out, he steals paint and other decorations for the statue from some of his other neighbor’s yards.

Phil finds out the next morning while he’s going to look at his statue and see if he can improve upon it. He storms around the neighborhood, and eventually ends up at Bill’s house. While Bill has had the statue, he has added his own touches

(badly) and he has tried to disguise it and pass it off as his own. Phil becomes infuriated, and calls the police. The police show up, and look at the statue. Bill says that it is his. Phil also says that it is his, and he shows the designs that he made, the plans, the tools necessary, and the prototypes. Bill says it’s his because it’s on his property. These policemen are very lazy and stupid1, so they do nothing at all about the situation. Phil gets even angrier, and he says the he doesn’t even want the statue; he can make another, he just wants Bill to not

1 I would like to state that I have nothing but the utmost respect for those who serve in the police force. I must beg your pardon for using these policemen in this metaphor, but I feel it necessary.

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claim that he made it himself. He would gladly let Bill have it if he paid for it and gave him credit. But, Bill says, this isn’t your statue. Look at the decorations.

Parts of it are missing too.

Phil storms off, and calls Jill, another neighbor of Bill’s, whom is equally angry, as almost as much of her stuff has been stolen to decorate the statue. They both head over to Bill’s house, where they discover he is entertaining a large group of guests. They all say that Bill made the statue and decorated it himself, which infuriates Phil and Jill even further. They both show the evidence that Bill had stolen the statue and the decorations, but the people at the house still say that

Bill made it himself.

Phil continues to try to bring Bill to justice by legal means, but Jill is slightly more agitated and kills Bill. However, she does not destroy the statue, because she assumes that Phil would like it back.

Bill’s friends gather at his house the next day, and they see that Bill is dead in front of the statue. They get whipped up into a frenzy, and say that Bill died trying to protect the statue from the vandal, that he sacrificed himself so that the statue would persist. This only angers Phil and Jill further, and Jill kills a few of them as well. However, thanks to the state of the neighborhood’s police force, Jill goes unpunished. Phil does think it a bit unnecessary, but not wholly excessive or baseless.

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Bill’s friends spread the word of his statue, and how he and some of his friends died for it, which attracts even more people. Eventually, Phil and Jill grow tired of telling them that it was originally their things that made the statue. So, the people who see the statue think it entirely original.

In the night, however, another thief breaks in and steals the statue, and decorations from around the neighborhood, and he sets the statue up and calls it his own. Among many of the people who have seen the statue, there are some that could re-create it, so they make the same argument that Phil did- I don’t want it back, I just want him to not claim it as his own. However, the thief does the same thing that Bill did- this isn’t your statue. Look at the decorations. Pieces of it are missing. The thief follows Bill’s original perpetration of the theft to a letter.

I suppose the Christians didn’t quite get the poetic justice of spawning Islam as penance for their own theft of Zoroastrian scriptures. Karma is indeed a bitch.

What Christianity is to Zoroastrianism, Islam is to Christianity. Self-discovery begat self-righteousness, which begat self-destructiveness.

Even naming the deity at the head of your religion ‘God’ is a show of arrogance and self righteousness, like stating “Our way is the only way, our god is the only god, and no other god can measure up.” It seems only fitting that Christianity

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named their leader God1, seeing as how they themselves are arrogant and self- righteous. They named their book (the Bible) after the Latin root word for ‘book.’

Can you imagine how arrogant it would be if a man wrote a book proposing a way of life stating that he was the messiah, the Son of God, and called it ‘The

Book?’

They also claim because they are special because they are monotheistic. Well, according to logic and fact, monotheists only have one divine power. Christians have two. God and Satan. A bad god still counts as a god. Perhaps more, if the particular sect believes in angels, demons, or other forces. Christians are not special in that right. They are polytheists, just like so many ‘Pagan heathen religions:’ Hindu, Romans, Tribals, and all the others they see as inferior.

Judaism is the only ‘true’ monotheistic religion, given the stipulation that Angra

Mainyu is a god in Zoroastrianism.

You could forgive basing a religion around a bunch of opium smokers if you acknowledge all these crazy miracles and hearing voices of divine power to be just a story. However, they all embrace the idea that all of these things actually happened in history. The only biblical miracle that has any base in truth is the story of the Great Flood- Native Americans, Hindu, Babylonians, Egyptians, and many other cultures tell the same story, except with the twist that the Hebrew

1 I also find it incredibly distasteful when Christians translate or publish the works of agnostic philosophers (such as Goethe) or pantheists (such as Thoreau) - they always capitalize ‘God.’

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version states they were the only ones who survived, and all who inhabit this world are related to Abraham.

“I’ve often thought the Bible should have a disclaimer in the front, saying ‘This is

fiction.” -Ian McKellen

Now, it’s obvious that the Old Testament of the Bible was meant to be taken as a story- nobody has ever parted the Red Sea, there are no ruins of Sodom and

Gomorrah at the bottom of the Dead Sea, no ‘angel of death’ visited Egypt upon one night, no man lived to be over nine hundred years old. Granted, they might all be metaphorical- the story of Sodom and Gomorrah includes a part when a woman is turned to salt when she looks back upon the smoldering ruins of her city, thus a simple explanation of a natural event- why the Dead Sea is so salty.

However, the New Testament is meant to seem entirely true. Now, I am incredibly doubtful that these events occurred at all. Allow me to compare the stories of the New Testament to something that someone would write today:

“Well, Barack Obama is the current president of the United States. Oh, also,

I am the son of god and I just cured a guy of cancer by touching him. I have six wings like the seraphim, and I am the walrus, Koo-koo-ka-choo.”

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The New Testament coincides factual things happening with boastful and arrogant lies about the greatness of things. Of course, there are things in history which would blatantly disprove all of the claims in the New Testament. If the

Catholic Church had not destroyed every last bit of contradictory evidence that arose at the time, I’m sure that Christianity would have crumbled before the dark ages began- perhaps preventing the entire period from occurring. Unfortunately for them, no matter how hard they tried, they cannot destroy the doubt within the mind of a man which will lead them down the path that ends with the truth. There is no weapon against their corruption like the razor edge of a sharp mind.

Christianity has an even more fantastic account of events- this God incarnate named Jesus supposedly came to Earth and performed a whole range of miracles, recorded by four of his twelve disciples at the time. A few of the other eight disciples wrote books too, but the four that are in the canonized bible are the ones that depict Jesus in the most positive light. The book of Thomas tells the story of Jesus making clay pigeons on the Sabbath, and when scolded by a priest he claps his hands and brings the pigeons to life and scatters them. Also, one of his friends dies while playing with him and he resurrects the poor boy to tell the townsfolk that it wasn’t Jesus’ fault. More forbidden books to the bible tell a much more realistic story- one elaborates more extensively on Jesus’ odd mannerisms. (He spoke only in parables- other books will tell you this too.) Of course, this particular book has been all but destroyed by the Catholic Church.

They have censored all but the most positive portrayals of Jesus. For almost two

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thousand years, the church has also concealed the fact that Jesus was a dark- skinned man. The Europeans had a very negative, racist view of brown people, and as such would not follow one’s lifestyle. So, like magic, Jesus became white1.

Much later, after Christianity had spread to every corner of the globe, a surprising trend showed up among various cultures- in Africa, Jesus is black. In Asia, he’s oriental. In South America, he’s Hispanic. People found it apt to pervert truth and history (why, they learn from example after all) to conceal the fact that not only was Jesus olive-colored, they also constantly forget that Jesus was a Hebrew.

I’ve seen some rather offensive (yet funny) photoshopped images2 on the internet of Jesus with a Raptor head, speaking in an internet language called

‘LOLspeak.’ Of course, the last one is a joke, but I find it funny, particularly one of the Pope with a raptor head photoshopped on with the caption of “Where is your

God now?”

Speaking of the Pope, the Catholic Church in particular is an abomination, worse than any other religion in the history of the world. There have been religions that sacrificed children. There have been religions that teach magic to spread chaos and havoc. The Aztec even sacrificed an excess of 20,000 prisoners to

Huitzilopochtli. But Catholicism beats them all out. Catholicism does monstrous

1 It’s also worth noting that the famous painting of White Jesus that everyone associates with him is actually based upon a portrait of Zarathustra. Zarathustra was not white, but very light-skinned for his race, according to the Avesta. 2 Courtesy of www.YTMND.com

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things too, but they lie through their teeth until they are caught in the act, and then they blame the individual.

Now, even though this is untrue, let's humor the idea for a moment: Catholicism was started by Jesus’ disciple Peter. If he was a disciple of Jesus in the early years, you can bet that he was big into the opium. Peter formed and was the first

Pope of the Catholic Church. Now, as I’m sure you can see pretty much anywhere, if a user of a psychologically addictive and mind-altering substance starts a program, business, or any form of organization, it is bound to be severely flawed in foundation.

Sadly, the Catholic Church survived. They survived due to preying on the fear of the common man. No other church preached damnation until the Catholics came along. People flocked to the Catholic Church because the church taught that all other ways would lead their eternal souls to Hell. I suppose that up until that point, religion had been a genuine attempt to help the individual, instead of fleece them out of ten percent of their income or more. Good people from other religions converted to Catholicism because they were afraid and could not see through the lie of the church.

Even in the fledgling stages of the Catholic church, it was very evident that a disgusting cancer of society was congealing and would live to torment mankind for millennia to come- the Catholic church preached ‘equality’ and ‘love,’ but at

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the same time they were exterminating Gnostics for ‘heresy’ because they added a few books onto the Bible the Catholics didn’t like because they forbade the way they did business, and one in particular just because it asserted that

Zoroastrianism was a ‘valid’ religion. This incarnation of Christianity from which all others are descended showcases hypocrisy better than anything I can think of.

Of course, the Catholic Church didn’t quite kick off until about three hundred years after the death of Jesus. The Catholics blame persecution of the Romans.

However, this is not the case. Three hundred years is the time it took for people to forget who and what Jesus and his disciples really were. Peter used his power in the church to silence his fellow disciples and destroy their works, except for those that glorified Jesus and called him the Son of God. Peter had no real authority, but he hid behind the power of the divine and said it was the will of

God. After a while, people forget who and what Jesus was, and they began to think of him as the Son of God.

“Is it any wonder that there are atheists in the world, when the church behaves so

abominably? “

-Voltaire

As I understand it, this modern notion of “Satan” was derived largely from the

Roman Emperor Nero Caesar. I will admit that Nero probably wasn’t the most

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upstanding Roman Emperor, but he was definitely no anti-Christ, or Satan, or any incarnation thereof.

Nero has left his mark upon history, as well as Christianity- the Hebrew numerical value for the name Nero Caesar is 6661, which is well known as the number of the beast as told in the book of Revelations, the final book of the bible. Of course, it was kept quiet when it was discovered that Revelations in the Bible today was a second draft- the first one said that the number of the beast was 616, among other discrepancies. That number corresponds to the numerical value for

Caligula Caesar, who was certainly no anti-Christ. You would think that the disciples of Jesus would find kinship in a man as completely and totally insane as him.

People liked to hear the stories of Jesus’ wacky antics, but when it came to his preaching and his rules on life, they pushed them aside for later. Christians would accept anyone at all into their religion, and still do. Scum who had no place to even show their faces began to glorify this perfect divine being, but shunned his teachings. That is the one of the major flaws of Christianity- a person of a cold, hard heart and a mind incapable of grasping anything at all being taught by the preacher was still welcomed into the family, and does not need to change.

1 On yet another funny side note, the numerical value of the title ‘Maitreya’ (and all variants) is also 666. So is the old-timey European version of the name Muhammad (Maometis), and so many other names as well. It is, for all intent, a very vague prophecy.

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‘Sure, you’re a piece of shit, but you don’t need to work on it, because God loves you anyway. You need not progress society. As a matter of fact, you can regress it, because Jesus is your lord and savior. You can cause however much suffering you want, because you are Saved, because you are better since you believe this way.’

With the stupidity and low quality of Christians, the corrupt officials of the Catholic

Church saw room for exploitation. They kept the masses dumb by preaching their sermons in a language that no one who listened knew, and no one understood the messages that were being preached. They sold positions in the church for money, claiming it was God’s will. They also sold Indulgences, money in exchange for pardoning of a sin instead of prayer and chants of absolution.

Now, from that time comes a fun little practice that has persisted to this very day.

If an inquisitive Christian asked a question that was not addressed by the less- than-circumspect bible, a priest would say something in Latin and translate it to quash the seeds of thought hatching in the mind of the inquisitor. The difference is, our bibles are in the language in which the common man can read, so the priest actually has to provide something out of the bible. Usually, the verse does not have any link whatsoever to the issue at hand. So, people walk away, somewhat shaken in their faith, and they struggle to find the answer ‘within.’ Most of the time, once they find the answer, they stop thinking and go back to believing what they are told. Occasionally, there is one who keeps thinking and

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denounces the lies that they are told in church. Out of those people, most become godless atheists simply out of spite to the church. Almost every atheist I have ever met accepts most religions as plausible, with the exception of

Christianity. Atheism these days is simply a group of people disgruntled with the way the church works, the quality of Christians, or they hate the god of the Jews.

However, those that do not become atheist become sometimes become a heretic like me, a fraction of a fraction of Christians.

It is entirely conceivable that one would allow themselves to be corrupted by hatred of the church, because the Catholic Church itself is by far the most corrupt organization to ever exist in the history of man. It is one of two organizations that has propagated genocide repeatedly, and is the only one that has ever succeeded in those genocidal endeavors.

Despite what you may hear, the Church has not changed one bit in two thousand years. Priests are still dishonest, still take bribes, still try to steal their followers’ incomes, still damn those to hell who do not believe as they do, and more recently they have indulged in pedophilia!

I do not know if this sudden rash of little boy banging is an isolated incident, or if it has been persistent across time and it has remained concealed all the while, until now. Ah, yes, the Holy man tells us we’re all sinners while staring at the altar boys with lust in his eyes.

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You know, Christianity has long been likened to disease- cancer, particularly, by members of every persuasion. Atheists have long used that argument, but recently actual practicing Christians have begun to acknowledge the truth of it! I cite the As I Lay Dying video of their song Nothing Left. Allow me to summarize it for you, without all of the yelling.

A woman discovers she has a disease that causes a sore- and there is massive hysteria to destroy this disease. She turns to the television and a fanatical looking man appears, with the caption of ‘Condemn the Infected’ on the bottom of the screen. She covers her sore with a scarf and coat, and goes to work, ironically working to find a cure for the disease. However, the idea to remove her scarf occurs to her, so she does, and her co-workers go berserk and call the police to take her away. She is taken before an arena of jeering people, calling for her death. The same man on the television (her executioner) tears off her clothes, and shows everyone her sores. The video cuts out with her standing on the edge of a cliff, on a plank of wood.

The video continues in a second part, in the video for The Sound of Truth.

Several people rescue the woman, and they are also infected with the same sore as she is. They all meet behind closed doors, and they formulate a plan to overthrow the Executioner, who is apparently the head of the government. While he’s making another broadcast, his guards take off their helmets and show their

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own infections. He’s taken to the same arena where he condemned the woman and put in the same position- but, he removes his gloves, and they are all shocked to see that he has the same disease that they do. Immediately, the hysteria dies down, and all of the spectators are stricken with a look of shame.

Personally, I’m looking forward to the third part, where the diseased begin to think of themselves as better because of their sores, and seek to spread their affliction to the innocent.

I took this video as an attack on hypocritical Christians. The executioner may be the prime example, but all of the infected are hypocritical in that they would kill him as he killed them. Thereby, perhaps inadvertently, the insinuation that all

Christians are hypocritical is made through this video.

I do not know how As I Lay Dying intended this video to be taken- the members of the band have claimed to be Christian (or at least raised Christian), yet their music is of such an anti-Christian nature that it would seem that it is simply a façade. They do reference the Bible repeatedly, but it generally doesn’t come out sounding too pro-Christian, and often incredibly nihilistic. Although, I suppose that’s what happens when you speak the truth.

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Sub-section: Atrocities of the God of the Jews

“With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil

people doing evil things. But for ‘good’ people to do evil things, that takes

religion.”

-Steven Weinberg

“He who abhors and shuns the light of the Sun,

He who refuses to behold with respect the living creation of God,

He who leads the good to wickedness,

He who makes the meadows waterless and the pastures desolate,

He who lets fly his weapon against the innocent,

An enemy of my faith, a destroyer of Thy principles is he, O Lord!”

-Zarathustra, Ahunuvaiti Gatha

“The church is certainly necessary for the people. It is a strong and conservative

element.”

-Adolf Hitler

Now, let’s take a quick look back into history. How much genocide has been committed in the name of the God of the Jews? About a dozen instances spring to mind at the moment: Aztec, Incan, Mayan, North American Indian, Muslim

Conquest, First, Second, Third, Fourth Crusades, the Ottoman Genocides,

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Holocaust and the Jihad of the time in which I write. Also, I count the Inquisitions and Salem Witch Trials, even though a certain group was not intended to be wiped out, it was still atrocious. How many have been committed in the name of other Gods? None. Not even in the name of a god of war have an entire people been wiped off the face of the earth. Across the 200,000 years humans have inhabited this earth, only with the formation of malignancy known as virulent

Abrahamic Monotheism two-thousand years ago was this evil ever made possible. Only in the name of the god of the Jews has genocide occurred, because those who worship him are warped and twisted, their hearts are closed to reason and emotion.

Certain authors consider themselves ‘above’ mentioning these incidents. Sorry, but I hold myself to no such intellectual standard- all evidence of wrongdoing is admissible in this trial of monotheism. Call it a cheap shot, a low blow- but you know if any other religion ever performed such atrocities, the Christians and

Muslims would be all over it. Glossing over it serves no purpose- except to mitigate the deaths of millions, the forceful sacrifice to the God of the Jews.

Still, I would hate for this to have the eventual effect of the events becoming a perfunctory mention in casual conversation. These diseased, pus-filled sores of humanity must be shown to the light, so that they may begin to heal. Keeping them cloaked in smoke and shadow serves no purpose, but to allow them to fester further.

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You also may take issue with my cursing during this section- however, I pose the question to you- if cursing the only paths to ever commit genocide and enslave the mind of billions is wrong, then exactly what is it acceptable to curse? These words have a purpose, and there is no more fitting purpose than to curse the practice that is a curse upon this planet of ours. Cursing may be the product of a crude mind, but Christianity and Islam are the products of evil minds. So, enough tarrying, let’s begin with the Crusades.

Oh, yes, we’ve all heard the stories of the crusades. We’ve all heard how

Constantinople was hopelessly besieged by the Ottoman Empire. We’ve also all heard about how Pope Urban the Second twisted a cry for help from a dying city to met his own ends, stating “Deus vult” (God wills it) in order to justify his off- subject venture to Israel to “Liberate” Jerusalem. He gathered men from far and wide, promising instant salvation to those who died on the journey, which is apparently within his power as the Pope to make up bullshit and say that it is the will of God, following the example of Peter. So, thusly, the crusaders ravaged the countryside, raped the women, and acted out their darkest, most violent urges, which they did not bother to keep in, since they would not bar them from going to

Hell. Why behave yourself when hellfire isn’t a threat, no matter what you do? Oh yes, our good ‘moral’ Christian friends served up another steamer. If immunity from divine punishment is enough to warrant such behavior, it’s a wonder that every atheist living today hasn’t killed, raped, and eaten someone- in that order.

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During this time, the Muslims and the Jews actually banded together against the

Christians to defend Jerusalem- one of the very few times you will see a Muslim and a Hebrew side by side in a battle in history. The Crusaders’ siege succeeded, and they ravaged the city, killing all who would not profess to be

Christian within its walls. It’s always so lovely to see the spirit of forgiveness and mercy in action.

The either less zealous or more intelligent of the Jews fled to every corner of the globe (the Old Globe, that is) and integrated themselves into the communities where they arrived. It is written that Jewish settlements began everywhere from

China to Africa, and they usually got jobs (this is history, not a racial slur) as merchants, bankers, and traders of every variety. As such, we have Jewish folks from around the globe who are white, black, yellow and brown. As to my knowledge, we don’t have a significant amount of red ones, but I’d still say that facts support that the Hebrew are the most ‘ethnically diverse’ single race.

The first crusade was such a rousing success that we had three more just because it was so enjoyable. Sure, the tables may have turned at one point, but it still ended up with the Europeans as the ultimate victor over the savage

Musselmen. So it is, with anti-Semitic and anti-Islamic feelings that we carry over into the inquisition.

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The Europeans decided ‘Hey, we’ve proved our god is better, but they still won’t convert! Let’s put a blade in one hand and a bible in the other, and let them choose.’ Thusly, they set forth abducting every Jew or colored person in sight.

Unsurprisingly, once kidnapped, brutalized, and told of this ‘mercy’ that they had yet to witness, a good bit of them chose to kill themselves in horrific manners than to convert to Christianity- their deaths may have been excruciating, but at least they still had their honor. One particularly fun torture device was a slide that had a razor up the middle that would raise very slowly, so as the ‘heathen’ slid down it, it would slice them in halves in an absolutely agonizing manner. If a person decides to die in a coffin of iron spikes instead of converting, you may very well have something fundamentally wrong with your religion.

But, then there’s the story of the barbarians. The savages. The heathens. The greedy.

The Aztec.

Are a few sacrifices enough to justify killing an entire race? Is the blood of a few prisoners a year worth the lives of millions of innocents? Is cultural ignorance of the ways of others a sin punishable by eternal shame?

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Oh, I should hope not. I should hope that we never see something so atrocious ever again. I should hope that no other race and their customs would be completely wiped from the face of this planet.

To Cortez, the above were perfectly fine reasons. Exterminate the brutes. Take their gold. They are not worthy. They tear out the hearts of other humans in religious rituals. We are worthy. We are right. We are humane.

We are merciful.

This from the man who follows a religion who already had millions dead in its wake. This from the man who follows a path of darkness that has no parallel, and

I hope never will. This from the man who deceived and manipulated the masses that believed him to be a god, and then killed them, but not before enslaving them and working them to death while they were ailing.

The Aztec knew what Cortez would do to them before he did. They called all of their armies back home, and armed them with their best weapons, called ‘atlatl’ and spears. Even with European armor and weapons, the Aztec fought valiantly and pierced their expensive steel with pointy little sticks. So it is that the noble fall before the inhuman. At least they put up a damn good fight under Cuauhtémoc before they were enslaved and raped- not metaphorically raped, I mean literally.

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That is why every modern descendant of the Aztec is still only a half blood- they are the product of rape, an ugly truth of reality.

It is said that Cortez went completely insane later in life, chattering to himself, not sleeping at night, and wishing for death. Oh, if anyone deserves such insanity, it is he. He, who has the blood of millions on his hands, the corpses of heathen gods laid at his feet, alongside bricks of gold.

They are barbaric, it is said. I’m sure those ten seconds that the man lives after his heart is torn out is complete agony. This from those who concocted the most brutal methods of torture and murder ever devised. Have two horses tear him apart. Draw and quarter him. Smear honey all over him and leave the flies to eat him. Run him down the razor slide. Flog him. Cut him. Stab him. Crucify him.

I find it rather funny that Cortez called the Aztec barbarians. Not only did the

Aztec’s torture and sacrifice pale in comparison both in number and in deed to things that the Church had officially sanctioned doing, it also hadn’t quit happening in Europe yet! Ever since the Black Plague, people in Europe found it apt to (falsely) blame Jews for spreading it by poisoning wells and they would execute them. Not for actually poisoning the wells, but for being Jewish and fitting into their paranoid little delusions as a suspect. A few people had the most fleeting basic amounts of logic and therefore felt the need for justification, thus

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leading to the use of ‘deicide’ (killing a god) as justice for slaughtering Jews en masse.

I would prefer ten seconds of not feeling my heart beat than days upon days of brutal torture utilizing the most horrific devices ever conceived, only to end in death anyway. But that’s just me. Perhaps suffering for what must seem like endless periods of time builds character, which you can utilize before your neck is broken from a contraption of a pole and a rope.

How dare the Christian community turn their eyes to this. Your great missionary killed an entire people because he did not understand them, and because his greed consumed him. He feared them. He feared the Shorn Ones who would never step backward in battle. He feared the ones that could catch, kill, and skin a jaguar, and use its pelt as armor. He feared this ‘brew of demons’ that caused them to speak prophecy and utter horrible truths. Because he did not understand them, he feared them, and because he feared them, he killed them. They were useless to him, just another brown-skinned inferior race, nothing but a tool to him. Nothing. Nothing at all.

When Cortez returned to Europe, he was a hero. The church applauded his genocide. They called it ‘gospel.’ So it is. So it is the good news that an entire race, and entire empire collapsed at the might of their god. So it is that the

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screams of a million fall mute before the cheers of a thousand. More land for the white folks. More land for the superior race. More land for the ‘Good religion.’

Cortez, through his hypocritically barbaric way of dealing with the matter, inspired other ‘do-gooders’ to attempt toppling empires. So they did, and the Maya and

Inca fell shortly, even though they never made any hostile gesture, and had no wish but simply to persist in their existence. Why? Because ‘they are brutes, they are savage, they are inferior, they are heathens.’ Above all, they have gold.

For centuries, the Northern American Indians killed the European, and got away with it for the most part- they would ride into town, steal food and women, kill a few folks, and it’s all great fun. Occasionally, a few Europeans would have the testicular fortitude to attempt a rescue or a raid of their own. When they tried to attack the Indian camps, they were usually routed and killed. When they did return with their wives, they would wake up the next morning to find that they had run away, back to the Indian camps where they were satisfied by the bold Indian man, as opposed to the frigid and prude ways of the European.

The less centralized Northern American Indians lasted a good deal longer than their Central American friends- close to four hundred years longer. I speak of this in past tense because the days of the Indian who can practice his way of life as he chooses is over. Today, all they have is the reservation, where the way of their ancestors is but a sham, and the echoes of the dead scream in their skulls

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every minute of every hour. The reservation is a sad, desolate place, filled with men and women who have suffered through a reality broken by the violation of treaties and demonizing of their ancestors. You may wonder why they choose to stay in such a place- it’s all they have. Literally, their families and some very few preserved traditions are all they have left. They don’t trust white people, nor do they wish to go out into the white man’s world and try to succeed. Can you blame them?

Speaking purely by numbers, the genocide of the North American Indian is the worst so far, at a total of 100 million by a lax estimate. To put this in context, that’s the number of Jews killed in the Holocaust multiplied by sixteen. The two don’t compare very well, since the Jews were forced into slave labor and killed for fun (actually, that happened too, but it was short-lived) and the Indians were killed for various reasons, existing being the main one. However, among those reasons are: Trusting the treaties and hollow words of the American

Government, raiding, tribal warfare, not leaving their land when politely asked at gunpoint, and refusing to accept Jesus Christ as their lord and savior (also at gunpoint).

It has been said that Sitting Bull and Crazy Horse betrayed their tribes. How very droll. The man who says that they ‘betrayed’ them is the one who dishonored the treaties and mowed them down with machine guns at Wounded Knee and gave them blankets infected with smallpox. Why did they surrender to the ways of the

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white man? They would die if they did not. Mercy? Not likely. They would show no mercy to them. They would hunt them and kill them like animals. They would justify such atrocity by claiming ‘they were asking for it.’ It is the way it has always been done, and still is. There would be no Indians if it were not for those that bowed. The small amount that we do have is thanks to great leaders who knew when to quit. So, the small Christian man has the nerve to say that they

‘betrayed’ their tribes. He points the finger yet again.

It was the same finger of the Christian man that caused many innocents to die so very long ago, in the sleepy town of Salem, Massachusetts. Popular perception of the events that proceeded that the town is famous for usually paint the girl who howled ‘Witchcraft’ as a whore who was trying to cover her own ass. In Arthur

Miller’s The Crucible, she is fat, too. So it was that a whore could invoke the name of Satan to her own ends and get those that she disagreed with executed.

Eventually, people began to see through her manipulative attempts, and they tried to go forward with their accusations. Of course, they were countered with accusations of witchcraft.

There were but two ways out of such an accusation- either admit that you are a witch, repent, and live out your life in shame, or die with your honor and without lying. Many chose to die with honor. One story that survives to this day is the one of the man placed under a press and piled up with stones in order to ‘squish’ his confession out of him. His last words were ‘More weight.’

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Eventually, the whore’s attempts at attention grabbing backfired, and the hysteria wound down, the people began to despise and shun her.

Oh, but it still doesn’t end there. There is so much more. You may think, “Such atrocity is unbearable! Those who allowed this to happen should be punished!”

Not only do the ones who turn a blind eye to it suffer absolutely no consequences, the perpetrators themselves share the same fate! Such things continue on to this very day, but the public turns its head in shame- they very well should be ashamed, but sitting back and letting it happen is just as bad as helping it along.

Only with the election of the previous Pope, John Paul II, has the Catholic

Church made any effort at all to apologize for their barbarisms. Even then, John

Paul’s apologies to the many groups that Catholics have slaughtered (Native

Americans, Jews, Muslims, women and alleged witches are but a very few) seemed to be a personal apology, not an official one. So, allow me to put this in context. Let’s say that you live in a home with your parents and a brother. Now, a man comes in during the night, stabs your brother to death and chops off your father’s testicles. While he’s there, he smashes almost all of your possessions and destroys your family record. Many years later, he comes back and offers you an apology- no reparations whatsoever. I would think the man who did this to you was gloating.

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However, I liked John Paul. He was a sincere man, peace be upon him, and if it were any other Pope I would be entirely convinced his apologies were gloating. It does puzzle me why he would head the Catholic Church knowing full well the atrocities that they have committed and seeing the far-reaching implications in action by looking around him. I suppose he thought he could save the church, but right after his death it would seem as Catholicism returned to its former path. The church seems to have completely forgotten his philosophy of tolerance and forgiveness. I think the speed at which they dispose of ‘outdated ideas’ is remarkable.

The various genocidal attempts occurring today generally stem from one of three sources- Failed imperial endeavors, failed infrastructure reconstruction leading to political and social upheaval, or lust for power and money. Perhaps all three.

There is one genocide which my very own American government refused to acknowledge up until a few years ago, and recognition of this event is due heavily in part to the musical group System of a Down. All of the members of the band are Armenian, which is unsurprisingly the ethnicity of the recipients of this next genocide.

Yet again, here is another group who just wanted to be treated equal. Christian

Armenians were second class citizens to the Muslim residents of the Ottoman

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Empire, and they often asked for equal treatment under the law. The Ottoman government passed a series of ‘sham resolutions’ that, in theory, would give the

Armenians equal rights, but they were never enforced. In retaliation, Muslims began to rampantly kill Armenians, sometimes in broad daylight and in view of law enforcement. However, the government did not seem to care, and these transgressions were wholly ignored.

Eventually, the Armenians realized that the Ottomans would not help them, so they turned to other countries. The nations that heard their grievances uniformly condemned the Ottomans, but they did not take kindly to having their affairs made public. Government officials incited protests on purpose in order to have a reason to kill Armenians and appear somewhat justified.

However, that’s just the beginning. Later, during World War I, the Ottoman

Empire’s Minister of War Enver Pasha blamed a defeat by Russian forces on the active help of the Armenians. Really, who could blame them? The Ottomans treated them like shit constantly, and refused to acknowledge they were equal citizens. It only seems fitting that this would happen.

The Greeks (at this point, also an imperial colony of the Ottoman Empire) were confronted with similar circumstances as the Armenians- they were treated as lesser because they were not Islamic; the government killed them regularly, and

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so on. The Ottomans decided to begin killing the Greeks for the exact same reason as the Armenians- Enver Pasha blamed them for helping their enemies.

The Ottomans didn’t quite see the poetic justice in this event- instead, they saw subterfuge. After these particular losses, the government (which operated under

Islamic Law) began to systematically purge their army of Armenians and Greeks, destroy cities, and openly kill them for no real reason. After all was said and done, a spectacular number of innocents lay dead- a British intelligence officer stated that there were 600,000 dead Armenians, and other accounts state an equal number of Greeks (for a total of 1,200,000 dead innocents). This does seem to pale in comparison to the next genocide to occur (by a factor of nearly ten, in fact) thirty years later, in yet another World War.

I have had the privilege that most Americans have not had- I have been to

Germany, to Munich, and I have seen the legendary Dachau concentration camp. I remember the scene quite vividly- the day that I was there, the sun refused to shine, the dirt squished under your feet, and the birds refused to sing.

Most people who have been to Dachau will tell you that the plaque with ‘Never

Again’ carved into it was the most memorable thing; however, I remember the films they were showing that day.

In these films, the Nazis were well aware that they were being taped (I believe a

Nazi was holding the camera) and they still did the most horrible things- they

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separated mothers from children, they starved their prisoners, they beat the stubborn ones, and they desecrated the corpses. If I recall correctly, one scene had two officers cracking jokes while tossing dead Jews into a ditch. I was eleven years old when I saw this film. I couldn’t even finish watching it; beholding it made me feel violently ill, and I was afraid I would vomit if I stayed.

To think, some people are under the entirely false impression that the Holocaust never happened. Genocide was coined as a crime to punish the atrocities committed in our two World Wars, and one of the first symptoms is ‘denial of other genocides.’ Some in my country like to deny that anything bad is going on at this very moment. However, I digress- look at Africa.

In many cases, it used to be hard to even mention the name of the continent without someone spouting ‘Those poor refugees in Darfur!’ Yes, those poor refugees, who you send money to, but you do not realize that your money is confiscated by the Sudanese government and used to buy more ammunition and explosives for the purpose of killing the poor misplaced folk. I do wonder why the civilians in Sudan do not rise up and overthrow the regime- do they actually approve of genocide? Was this also the case in Rwanda, and in Kenya?

Oh, the foolish Europeans. They left Africa completely without infrastructure, and now the horrors that they planted so very long ago with imperialism have begun to bloom. The imperialism itself was bad enough- millions died, millions were

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enslaved, and the continent was sucked dry of resource and anything of value. Is it any wonder that it has turned out this way?

The Middle East is no bed of roses, either. For as long as memory persists, the

Arabians (and certain Persians) have killed each other for some reason or another, flinging around ‘jihad’ ever so often. Without an outside foe, they return to their infighting because they believe that their enemy is evil, harbors the great

Djinn Satan, and allows women to walk around without burqas- gasp. Islam, ever since it started, has been an atrocity to life. Even while Muhammad lived, the

Islamic waged war against others over petty matters, and forced conversion of the conquered. That’s how Islam has always spread- like a virus.

Oh, but the Americans made the mistake of getting involved in Afghanistan in order to repulse Russia, and drive them from the Middle East. Getting involved wasn’t really so bad, but after it was over the wise Congress said ‘See you later’ and left the Afghans without any infrastructure, no monetary compensation for saving the world from communism, and no reconstruction. This was in stark contrast to the plan originally agreed upon, devised by Senator Charles Wilson- he supported reconstruction and rebuilding of the ruined country. Still, our

Congress, seeing nothing beyond the dollar signs in their own eyes, decided to deviate from the plan and leave Afghanistan to the dogs.

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Surely enough, violent wars broke out and the country changed hands between political parties and military leaders a great number of times. Eventually, the

Islamic fundamentalist institution ‘The Taliban’ gained power, and instituted

Islamic doctrine as law. So, the people suffered, the women could not walk around in public without a man and without a burqa. Hospitals closed, homes were raided, innocents were killed- this became humdrum, a common occurrence.

I have heard it said in nations where Islam is the law that suffering is the mentality of the people. Has it never occurred to the populace that if things are so horrible under Islamic law, despite whatever leader is in power, that you should change your damn religion?

No, Islam is all they know- there is nothing at all beyond Islam. To them, there is

Islam, and then there is ‘dishonor’ and ‘cowardice.’ Ah, yes, dishonor and cowardice- I’m sure that those are rare things in Islam, especially among the heroes of the radicals, the suicide bombers. Rather than kill and be punished, and still die a martyr, they decide to blow themselves up and forego the dreadful procedure of ‘taking responsibility.’ So they kill, usually killing more faithful than infidel, in order to fulfill some perverse fantasy involving seventy-two virgins.

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Tell me, reader- have you ever heard the family of a suicide bomber talk? They are not ashamed. They are glad that their relative killed themselves, and they talk about how honorable it is and how renowned he is.

Islam is frightening beyond all else to me, because there is no such thing as a

‘moderate Muslim’ while in the company of other Muslims. In community, all of the members are fanatic and fundamentalist- the Quran is infallible, Muhammad was the greatest man to ever life, and Allah is all powerful, all knowing, and loving.

Islam is an atrocity in and of itself- the followers suffer endlessly, and they are kept from knowing that there is another way, that they can find a better path.

They end up projecting their suffering on others, sometimes innocent, sometimes guilty. Suffering is both the product and the cause of this religion- I do not know why no one has stood up in the Muslim world and attempted to break the cycle.

When you ask those who flee Islam why they did not do so sooner, they simply state “I didn’t know I could.”

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Return to Grievances

“Every sensible man, every honorable man, must hold the Christian sect in

horror.”

-Voltaire

Yet another grievance- many of the devout Christians and Muslims I have met or knew were some of the most intelligent people around, yet they squandered their potential on religions which preach that all people worship the same way, without room for individual expansion- there is one law for every person, and every person must live the same life and must be perfect. If you don’t, you’re subject to shame in this life and hellfire in the next. It’s absolutely disgusting to see that these religions ever came to exist, much less persist as they have. They follow one book, with absolutely no room for any kind of personal expansion in the way of enlightenment whatsoever. They are fed lies so often that they begin to accept it as truth. That is why they are twisted and dark hearted. They cannot distinguish truth from lies. So, here’s a theory for you:

The Christian God is the greatest evil ever known, and his names are simply euphonized names of the destroyer. He is the Plagued One of the Urreligion.

As I said earlier, God surely does not love humanity.

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Now, not only is that statement heretical, blasphemous, and sacrilegious, but when you look back it makes oh so much more sense. How very sad that the

Christians and Muslims do not even know that they serve a dark god. Such is his deception.

Let me share a fun secret with you, reader, just between us. Let me tell you about who first concocted this idea of the God of the Jews. It was Zarathustra, except he did not call him Yahweh or Jehovah- he called him Angra Mainyu. His descriptions of Angra Mainyu fit the God of the Jews exactly- repeatedly, he stated that the only way that Ahriman could avoid persecution was to masquerade as a being of light. While I’m at it, this god also perfectly fits the descriptions of Tezcatlipoca. The epithets are fitting, and even the sacrifices delivered unto him were performed in a manner much like the Jesus himself- live like a god, then give yourself up to sacrifice.

“Behold, Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah, Kali, Ahriman, Smoking Mirror, Plagued One!

We are His Slaves! Lord of the Near and Nigh! Enemy of Both Sides! Praise to

Wrong Thought! Laud to the one whose existence is a disease! Hail to the one that lusts for our blood, for he is perfect and loving!”

The fools. They worship the one who wishes them harm. The damn fools. They offer your praise to the god of suffering, the one of slavery. He has enslaved their minds, as is his goal. To think, they keep wondering why things keep turning to

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shit, even though more people are converting every day. The people converting are the reason that things are turning to shit- they’ve come to serve evil.

The Hindu1 have long known that Kali and Yahweh were one and the same. For nearly a hundred years, they have used Kali as a representation of Allah, particularly since they dislike being force-fed Muslim ideas. I am sad to say that the Muslims have provoked several Hindu into military action in recent years, which is saddening beyond belief- over thousands upon thousands of years, the legendary patience of the Hindu has not been broken, and it is surely a sign of this Kali-Yuga in which we live that such a thing can occur.

As I stated earlier, Christianity is easily likened to a disease. The first one who realized this was, yet again, Zarathustra. He cautions men to avoid Angra Mainyu as one would avoid infliction, for Angra Mainyu is an infliction of the soul.2 But, if

Christianity is a common virus, then Islam is AIDS.

The Christians, the Muslims, and the Jews all serve the same god, and yet for so long they have harbored such hatred towards each other- only after the

Holocaust were Jews and Christians somewhat reconciled. For so long they have

1 Historically speaking, the Hindu first devised the (recorded) idea of the Plagued One, whom they called Kali, which I believe is first noted in the Bhagavata Purana, from nearly 3,000 BC. Regardless, Zarathustra’s teachings are the ones that the idea for Yahweh/Angra Mainyu are plagiarized from in the first place. 2 Yet again, there is a passage in the Avesta that I will paraphrase here: “Ahura Mazda’s will is this: Know me, for if you know me you will come to me. Angra Mainyu’s will is this: Do not know me, for if you know me you will flee from me.” This particular passage would seem to advocate a thorough understanding of (both good and) evil- something in stark contrast to Christianity and Islam.

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killed their brothers, who wish to spread the word of their god, only because they see him differently. The Arabic and Persian populations (almost entirely Muslim) has been violent through all of their history of being Islamic (not so much when they were Zoroastrian), and only since the homecoming of the Jews have they taken their violence out on an outside enemy. For centuries, they have simply fought amongst themselves, killing rampantly- for what? What is the ultimate end of all the blood that has been shed amidst the sand? It is nothing. Nothing has come of the sacrifice of so many for their god, and they died for nothing.

Today, what I witness when a man straps a bomb to his chest and blows himself up in order to fulfill his selfish desire for seventy-two virgins is nothing but the end of this monotheism. When innocents die when a Christian bombs an abortion clinic, it is not a shock to me. They are filled with hate. They do not know what love is, because they are told that hate is love, and vis-à-vis. They are blind, so very blind- some simply wear the blindfold, but others actually pluck out their eyes, so that they shall be blind forever, and no man can show them the light.1

These horrid two, more than any other religions that have ever existed, are abominations. Christianity is weak, but Islam remains quite powerful, despite the passage of time. The problem with the Christians is that they are ignorant and indoctrinated, and they can still be shown the light, but the Muslim is a different matter. Muslims do not want to hear that they are wrong. In their minds, they

1 Martin Luther has said a number of horrible things to such an effect, but one that pertains most directly is: “Whoever wants to be a Christian should tear the eyes out of his reason.”

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cannot be wrong, for Muhammad was infallible and Allah is merciful. They will kill the one that tells them that it is so. They heard it so much so very long ago that they had to take to murder and conquest to spread their religion, which passed down the line in the conquered people to present day. You get very few converts to or from Islam, unless an external stimulus is present. They, more than any other religion, frighten me- it is no coincidence that such horrid genocidal conditions within Africa and the Middle East persist because Islam exists.

Islam, to me, is a magnified version of all the flaws of Christianity. They are more hypocritical, more atrocious, more violent, more dogmatic, and more self- righteous. The Christians have the only successful genocide to ever occur under their belt, but the Islamic seem to make a sport out of fostering conditions ripe for atrocity. The Christians are winding down, but the Islamic are only beginning to step up.

The Islamic claim that Allah is a god of mercy. That’s a hypocrisy beyond anything I have ever heard come out of the mouth of a Christian. Tell me, where was the outrage in the Muslim community when Osama Bin Laden flew two planes into the World Trade Centers, and one into the Pentagon? Why can they not overthrow their oppressive leaders without instituting an even more violent regime in its place? Why is it that every time they get a hold of guns, they insist upon shooting each other and creating power struggles instead of stockpiling them or disposing them?

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Allow me to answer all of the above. Allah is a god of wrath, violence, and discord, not mercy. Why is it that when an Islamic regime comes to power in a nation, it is soon followed by horrible crimes against humanity? Darfur, Rwanda,

Afghanistan, Kenya, Libya, Iraq, Iran, Palestine, and Pakistan can all testify to this. I’m sure after this book is released there will be many more to add to this list. It would be arrogance in the highest to assume that this book will be important or powerful enough to penetrate the iron walls of Muslim culture that perpetuate the suffering in Islamic countries.

One thing has always bothered me- if Muhammad and Jesus were so great, why didn’t they teach more reliable followers like Buddha and Zarathustra did? I’m sure if you really were a prophet, you would realize that somewhere along the line someone is going to misquote you or have a personal agenda, and then your entire following based upon the hate-filled speech or propaganda uttered by one of the men around you. I believe it’s because Muhammad and Jesus weren’t really prophets. Don’t get me wrong, they may have been great men, minus the opium problems, but their word has been used to justify atrocities and all sorts of malice. I’m sure they meant well with the message of peace and charity, but a man should not be elevated to the level of omniscience and omnipotence, not even on a virtual level. No mere man is a god, as logic would dictate.

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I do not hate Christianity (yes, just Christianity, not Christians. I follow the idea

‘Hate the sin, not the sinner’) because of some imaginary deity who probably did not ever cause such atrocity in his name- I hate Christianity because of what they actually have done. No other religion, no other practice, no other way of thinking has ever been proven to be so evil, so harmful, so destructive to the human race.

I hate it because of the hundreds of millions that have died at the hands of

Christians. Apparently, their other cheek was already turned. And, if you don’t hate Christianity, why not? It is perfectly acceptable to hate the single most evil organization to ever fester in the back of four men’s brains. Evil is not a thing to coddle or befriend- evil is a thing to destroy. You must defend yourself from evil by any means possible, by sword or by word.

Now, as allegorical as that last statement may seem to the Old Testament, I can assure you I do not mean raise your scimitar over your head and scream “Praise be to [insert god here], for we are killing the evil ones!” To cut down one evil individual with a sword spawns two more elsewhere, which I think is something that Christianity and Islam have proven quite well. Evil is wrong thought, and it is to be destroyed by right thought, not by stabbing someone through the eye with a steel implement or slicing them in half for not converting.

Christianity and Islam are not all bad- the bulk of the work in the Bible and Qur’an may be to our benefit, but their flaw is in their arrogance: “I am the way, the truth, and the life. None shall come to the father except through me” (John 14:6). To

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incorporate evil ideas and call them true is the problem here. To falsify events and pervert history is the problem. There is a very simple way to solve this problem- say it’s a story, that it never happened. Tell the truth.

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III:II- Grievances of the Dharmic Religions

“I am a Hindu by birth. And yet I do not know much of Hinduism, and I know less of other religions. In fact I do not know where I am, and what is and what should be my belief. I intend to make a careful study of my own religion and, as far as I

can, of other religions as well.”

-Mahatma Gandhi

I would like to take this opportunity to state that there is absolutely no ancient religion that is still practiced as it was meant to be. Even Hinduism and Buddhism have been corrupted- by the above, Christianity and Islam. Zoroastrianism is tainted with false scripture and ideas, and the Buddha’s revelations are relayed through false perceptions. Hinduism has been slowly weathered away by the imperial British, replacing their ‘heathen philosophy’ with Christian ideals. More recently, the Islamic have been forcing their ideas down the throats of the Hindu, and they are beginning to do so with the Buddhists as well1.

I can find no real fault with Buddhism, except for the fact that it’s a wee bit radical in its beliefs, even today when we have had 2,500 years to adjust to the odd mannerisms and teachings and whatnot. Buddhists are the most honorable and

1 Hinduism states that this cycle of degeneration is nothing more than to be expected, which is why the Hindu are typically very patient (with the exception of recent years), because they understand what is going on in the world. Also, the world forgetting the Buddha’s teachings and existence is a sign of the apocalypse in the Buddhist religion. While it may not be true at face value, the Buddha’s teachings seem to be remembered in word alone, and not in action. In the minds of men, they are forgotten.

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most practical of any Eastern religion I can think of, seeing as how they actually follow the doctrines laid before them. Buddha’s teachings do indeed work, and the instilment of peace and enlightenment into the world is refreshing.

However, the Hindu are another matter. Hindu constantly stray from what practically everything they are taught as we look back in history, but still the corruption is nowhere near the abomination of Christianity. Most Hindu listen to what they are told, but simply ignore the parts they dislike. The people believe that Hinduism is an antiquated religion; and even after several millennia there have been very few who grasp the deeper meaning of the symbolism of

Hinduism. Indeed, there is great knowledge to be gained by studying them, but the large obstacle between stupidity and enlightenment in Hinduism is interpreting the symbols in the stories and the forms of the gods. Of course the stories never happened- the Hindu will acknowledge that Vishnu never actually took the form of a fish and saved a village. It is the symbolism and sentiment behind the stories that matter in Hinduism. I do find it odd, though, that they would place such importance upon cows of all animals. Cows, who chew cud and pass gas in the fields all day.

Hinduism does have a darker side to the matter- the ultimate goal is complete and total nothingness- no thought, no action, no anything. A great Hindu swami is quoted as saying ‘Happiness is a disease.’ Now, if there is anything to dissuade one from such a religion that would be the one. Perhaps since I was born and

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raised in the western world, that comment seems particularly disturbing. Perhaps the Hindu are content with their misery, to use a paradox. I, in contrast to this man, find contentment to be one of the relatively few pure virtues left in this decaying world.

But, I cannot base the basis of a religion on the words of one man thousands of years after the religion was formed. I do not know much of Hinduism- perhaps this one man was the radical who took an otherwise decent sentiment and made it a little too extreme, which is all too common of a problem in this world.

Still, the Hindu’s actions as of recent raises some very disturbing questions-

Mahatma Gandhi continually extolled the virtues of ancient Hinduism whilst he was still inhabiting his earthly shell; I believe he saw the same thing I do.

Hinduism has become corrupted under the short rule of Christianity, and it only took that long for those so very vile to taint their ancient practices. The conduct of the Hindu (particularly in India) recently shows that very same taint upon their thoughts: They have been much easier to provoke, recently they have begun to burn churches down and kill Christians (with good reason, but still not the way to go), and they have become materialistic instead of spiritual in nature. But, it is naught more than a sign of the Kali-Yuga. I would hope that they would fight degeneracy, not embrace it as they have. Their gods are not the same gods their ancestors worshipped- they may be the same in name, but make no mistake; they are by no means even the slightest bit similar.

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There may well be a few Hindu left with knowledge of the ancient ways who have not blindly embraced materialism, but very few here in America. Here, in my homeland, all I see are the ones that are so proudly paraded before us; foremost among them, the pallid pseudo-philosopher Deepak Chopra1, whose Hinduism is nothing more than New Age ‘cow manure’ packaged and wrapped for the enjoyment of the consumer. It truly is a shame that he must drag this practice down by calling it ‘Hinduism.’ Why not call it what it is- Kali-ism.

Why, several of the passages of the Bhagavata Purana describing the horrors of the Kali-Yuga seem to apply directly to Chopra. I believe the decadent being called ascetic is one, and practicing religion solely for appearances is another.

Chopra and so many others are not Hindu- they have succumbed to the Kali-

Yuga. The way of ancient Hinduism is dead, and has been dead ever since

Christianity (the hand of Kali himself) replaced it with this tainted Hinduism substitute, Kali-ism. Even those that once spread the greatest good have been infected by the greatest evil, and like all the others infected by this disease, they are completely unaware.

By this way of thinking, the Hindu meditative practice of ‘yoga’ has been advertised as little more than exercise. Very few who participate in it understand where it comes from, and what purpose it serves in the larger scope of things.

1 I would like to state that I do not know Chopra as a man, so I am not qualified to speak on his character; however, his actions display a taint that is shared in common by many so-called Hindu.

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Bleached blonde, breast-augmented pseudo-intelligent socialites cling to this practice like flies to honey.

Mahatma Gandhi fought Kali throughout his entire life, and it is disheartening to see that those who he tried to save would shun him and return to their materialism so very quickly. So, they return to their false Vishnu, a puppet for

Kali, but I would have them remember this: You had a choice. Gandhi lived his entire life, struggling to show the Hindu the error of their ways, but apparently it was all for naught. The British imperialism may have left, but the taint stayed; that was what Gandhi fought against, not the imperialism itself, but the evil it carried with it. If the imperialism had carried Vishnu’s will with it, Gandhi would have sat back and approved of their actions. But that is not what he did; he fought, nonviolently, to remove Kali from Hinduism because he believed that he could save future generations from this evil. However, though Gandhi died, Kali’s work continues, and Gandhi’s work has been severely mitigated to nothing more than politics. It’s disgusting to see how quickly the Hindu have cast him aside and do

Kali’s bidding.

However, to end on a happy note, I took the liberty of assuming that the Hindu cycle story involving a 400,000 year period per cycle was incorrect, and I set out to re-calculate it based on the timeframe between Krishna and Siddhartha

Gautama (both incarnations of Vishnu, according to Hinduism and Buddhism).

Assuming that Krishna died in 3102 BC, and Buddha Gautama died in 483 BC,

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there is a 2,619 year gap between the two. Also assuming that time is cyclical, it means that Kalki/Maitreya will die in the year 2163 AD. That means that the tenth incarnation of Vishnu (or twenty-eighth Buddha, whatever floats your boat) is coming soon- very soon.

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III:III- Grievances of the Nahua Religions

“Soon comes the sacrificing priest- and this is no small office among them- armed with a stone knife, which cuts like steel, and is as big as one of our large knives. He plunges the knife into the breast, opens it, and tears out the heart, hot

and palpitating.”

-The Anonymous Conqueror, Narrative of Some Things of New Spain and of the

Great City of Temestitan, Mexico

Well, I believe this one explains itself- the Nahua religion is considered semi- barbarous, as the people themselves were. However, if this particular religion serves any global purpose, it is to support the idea of the Urreligion from which all other religions are descended. I find the practice of the particular religions of the Nahua to be barbaric, thanks to the workings of the god Tezcatlipoca.

The Nahua have allowed Tezcatlipoca to infiltrate and pervade their society to such a point that they believe him to be omnipotent, to be capricious- but though suffering may seem like it has power to do as it pleases, it does not, in reality.

The people of Central and South America have failed to bar Tezcatlipoca from their thoughts- they had failed as a religion long before Cortez came over. Still, that does not justify what he did. There is absolutely no reason to ever exterminate an entire culture, no matter how awful they may appear.

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Their service to Tezcatlipoca was out of fear, mainly- they did not want to have divine wrath rained down upon their heads, for Tezcatlipoca was of a temperamental nature, and his opponent Quetzalcoatl offered no such damnation. Their faith was based upon this thing called ‘Pascal’s Wager’ later on.

The practice of sacrificing living beings was Tezcatlipoca’s will, and his will flowed over to the other gods because ‘it is by His Will that They Live.’ They allowed themselves to become consumed with their own suffering, with their own pain- they portrayed suffering to be more powerful than knowledge, than progress. They portrayed suffering to have infinite power, and that is their downfall. Past the deceptions, suffering is nothing more than a state of mind, a choice to despair. Suffering is powerless if you understand what it is.

If they had followed Quetzalcoatl, perhaps things would be different- only relatively small sacrifices would be allowed, minor bloodletting except for the once-a-year sacrifice to Tezcatlipoca of a young man. Perhaps their society would have been worth preserving in the eyes of the Spaniards. Perhaps they could have fought off the Spaniards, who knows? Quetzalcoatl’s progress and intelligence are indeed powerful, but they chose despair over happiness. So, instead of what may have happened, we have what actually did happen- they were killed for being barbarians. They offered sacrifices to ideas, abstract gods who did not care in the least for them, who did nothing to help them in their hour of need.

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The Nahua serve as a poignant example to the Hindu- their religions are very similar in nature, but Nahua chose to let their pain blind them; their pain turned to suffering, and their suffering spread, choking out happiness, leading to their barbaric worship. This may very well have been the Hindu- as the Nahua have succumbed to Tezcatlipoca, so too could they have succumbed to Kali. But they did not, at least up until recently. The Ancient Hindu followed Vishnu, and sought to spread happiness and wisdom, instead of becoming consumed by their own despair, their own base urges, their own pain, their materialism- which is more than I can say for modern Hindu.

Still, at least there is something to be said for the Nahua- at least they called their legends ‘just a story’ instead of ‘historical fact.’ Tezcatlipoca had not pervaded their society so extensively to warp reality at the whim of the perceived, which is more than I can say for Christianity and Islam. It seems as though the Nahua would take very quickly to the idea of the Christian God, with the exception of the

Maya and select few others who were significantly less drawn to him and more towards Quetzalcoatl. I do wonder why Cortez killed them- their beliefs are so very similar in nature; then again, why do Christians kill Muslims, other

Christians, and Jews? They all kill each other. It is their nature. The Christians,

Muslims and Nahua are all slaves to the same god- the god of barbarism, violence and regression- Jehovah, Allah, Tezcatlipoca- he is the same entity.

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Yet, like all those serve this god, they only realized what he was once the knife was already in their backs- and that is the ultimate freedom from Tezcatlipoca- betrayal sets his followers free from his leash. Of course, his betrayal commonly ends in their demise, leaving death in his wake and no witnesses to speak of it.

So, the Aztec have already fallen to Tezcatlipoca; how many more must fall before we as a race can realize what he truly is?

The Nahua prayed endlessly to Tezcatlipoca to help them when the Spaniards brought their disease and weapons with them, but he just sat back and chuckled.

I am reminded of a phrase uttered by a famous man: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” The Nahua died just like Jesus, due to a mix of violence and a malignant cancer called Tezcatlipoca.

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III:IV- Grievances of Atheism

“A little philosophy inclineth man's mind to atheism; but depth in philsophy

bringeth men's minds about to religion.”

– Sir Francis Bacon, On Atheism

Oh, I don’t even know where to begin on modern atheism. I could go on and on about how I’ve never met a hardline atheist who was truly content, but lots of people don’t like the ‘empirical’ point of criticism. Perhaps I should start out with that bastion that the fools who blindly follow atheism hold so dear- science.

Religion is a biological need for a balanced psyche and true happiness. The atheist without any counterbalance of religion will go completely insane and become sociopathic, and it is only due to the moral order that was originally pioneered by prophets such as Zarathustra and Buddha that such godless individuals can continue to function properly in modern society.

What is this magical key to existence that I have discovered that proves this? It was not my research that uncovered it; like many other surprising conclusions that you have likely never heard of before, someone reached it before me but did not pursue it to fruition. This particular discovery is the research of a particular psychopharmacologist Dr. Rick Strassman who performed research upon a chemical called dimethyltryptamine (DMT) in my neighboring state of New

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Mexico. The simple existence of dimethyltryptamine proves almost every religion wrong on many matters1, atheism being included.

Perhaps I should explain the chemical properties of DMT before I start flying off the handle, though. DMT is a naturally occurring neurotransmitter/hallucinogen that exists in every macro-organic form of matter on this earth; in humans, it is produced in microgram increments (i.e., picomolar concentrations) from our pineal gland (the gland that reacts to light and dark)2. Surprisingly enough, DMT is also the single most potent hallucinogen that can be created or ever will be created for terrestrial organic matter. The reason for this startling truth is that earthly organic matter is tailored specifically to respond to dimethyltryptamine- by evolution’s very hand, we are compelled to believe in the supernatural.

But, you might ask, how do I know it is essential to life? That’s an easy one- when the pineal gland is removed, the heart immediately stops. When DMT levels drop drastically, such as when an individual is proved wrong about a core belief (i.e., after failed marriages, death of loved ones, or discovering that there

‘is no god’) their heart muscle will begin to weaken drastically, and if the blow is severe enough the afflicted person’s heart will completely stop. This is a documented cardiovascular condition called ‘Broken Heart Syndrome3.’ In many

1 The only three major ones that it doesn’t invalidate are based upon mind-altering substances anyway- Hinduism, Buddhism (indirectly) and Zoroastrianism. 2 The Pineal gland also serves several other purposes; a course in Anatomy and Physiology or basic Neurology is very revealing of its various functions. 3 The proper name is Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy. The Takotsubo story is also a critical historical point in Japanese Tentacle Pornography, on a side note.

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cases, due to the weakening of the myocardiam (the heart muscle) and the stress of the traumatic incident, the afflicted person will die from said event.

I know it is essential to life because of this- a person with no DMT will die immediately, and DMT is involved in the psychological process of belief.

Therefore, it is malarkey to claim that any individual is completely irreligious, or they would be dead. People may worship their various idols, their transitory and faulty discoveries of ‘popular science’ based upon a limited and ultimately inferior understanding of reality due to the absence of DMT, but nobody really worships

‘nothing’ or their heart would have stopped in despair. There’s always some belief in something that they cling to.

I also take issue with the idea that ‘science’ and ‘reason’ are the only way that people can ever form ideas. The simple existence of religion completely destroys that idea. Thousands of years ago, some Hindu came up with the idea that the enlightened individual had an open third eye on their forehead, which I’m sure any atheist would laugh at. However, unbeknownst to the common man, the pineal gland is at the forefront of an embryo’s head while it is developing, and when a child is first observable by sonogram the pineal gland is exactly where the Hindu put the Bindi, or draw the third eye, and the images on the sonogram actually look as though the child does have indeed have a third eye. In many reptiles and amphibians, the pineal gland actually has a crude lens like an eye and is referred to as a Parietal eye.

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Of course, as a human matures the pineal gland moves deeper into the brain matter until it is quite embedded, but you can’t tell me that’s just coincidence.

Still, I must admit that the evidence that Dimethyltryptamine is the core motivation for life seems shaky even to me; doubtless, it is something (or perhaps a combination of somethings) that is produced by the pineal gland, and really my only conclusive proof that said chemical compound is DMT is due to empiricism based upon patients that I have actually seen, and how the atheistic ones tended to be considerably less happy and on average had a greater prevalence of disease due to improper function of their bodies and even infection due to less responsive immune systems. That, and I’ve met a few folks who have used the crystalline form of DMT as a hallucinogen and without exception they say that it is the single most profound experience they have ever had. It drove a few of them completely crazy, but you have to break a few eggs to make an omelet, right?

But, on a somewhat related note, you would never catch a ‘pop atheist’ going out on a limb and forming a premise like this, because of these two things:

1) It takes some basic amount of courage to stick your neck out at all

instead of just jumping on the bandwagon of ideas that have been

proven true by a series of people with fancy ‘degrees’ which

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apparently equate to thorough learning and complete mastery of

their subject matter. Incidentally, an acquaintance of mine who

cheated her entire way through high school and ended up in the top

ten percent decided she’s going to go to ‘doctor school’ and get a

degree. In all likeliness, she’s going to cheat her way through her

pre-med and Medical school as well.

2) Why, it contradicts what they believe. Despite this hollow mantra of

‘open-mindedness,’ atheists are absolutely no better than religious

folk when it comes to fanaticism and fundamentalism. Just because

they have no doctrine does not make atheism in any way different

from other systems of belief. Skepticism to the atheist means ‘I’m

skeptical of what religious folk believe, but not what I believe,

because I’m smarter. I can’t be wrong, because there is only one

answer to every question and science tells us that answer.’

I see absolutely no difference between popular atheism and religion besides the absence of some kind of moral values. Science is the doctrine, faulty human logic is the god, and the absence of a god is the unifying belief.

Science is a chaotic system, new research and findings always invalidating the old, and even newer research invalidating the new conclusion and reinforcing the old… and so on. Not to mention, it is a rather slow mode of discovery- twenty-five hundred years ago, Gautama Buddha had an idea he called ‘dependent

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origination,’ and now twenty-five hundred years later, we have this thing called

‘string theory’ which is for all intents and purposes, secularized dependent origination with numbers. It took science 2,500 years to discover something that a religious figure had already enunciated. In the field of philosophy, this is just as common. While many philosophers may or may not have actually read Buddha or Zarathustra’s works, they end up enunciating the same ideas multiple millennia afterwards. What a shame we haven’t progressed.

Although, that having been said I find atheism practiced as it should be (what the pop atheists fancy themselves to be) rather refreshing. A truly intelligent atheist will realize that there is no ‘certainty’ involving religion, either that is completely true or complete bunk, but they choose to be more inclined to logic than faith.

Much like religious people, I find atheists with just the slightest bit of doubt in the infallibility of their arguments to be infinitely more tolerable than their fanatic counterparts.

On a different note, DMT also validates another claim that many atheists would point out about religion- it is a drug1. It’s an incredibly potent hallucinogen that is produced in your pineal gland during at small increments in day to day life, and the various fluctuations in the production of said drug account for practically all parts of the bell curve of religion; those deficient in DMT are most likely to be atheists, and those with a surplus are likely to be fanatics, fundamentalists, what have you.

1 Dawkins calls it ‘Gerin Oil.’ Get it? Hahaha. British people and their wordplay.

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Due to the interactions that DMT analogues have with neurons and how rapidly they seem to decay with overuse of certain drugs (i.e., magic mushrooms, mescaline) it would also lead me to believe that high levels of DMT would also cause you to go completely insane, should the high levels be maintained long enough, or should you have enough ‘religious experiences.’ So, in that vein, atheists can in fact be said to be the sanest among us, but does that necessarily equal higher value as a person?

I digress. I find normalcy to be quite a bore. Why, after all, what do people who are ‘normal,’ who have no drive or aspirations to something more, accomplish?

The bare minimum. They achieve what is necessary for them to keep living their mundane lives. It is through the aspiration from madness that drives us to accomplish greater things; giving ourselves a lasting name. Immortality, so to speak.

This has really been an attack on the more nihilistic side of atheism that is really just more of “I don’t believe for the sake of not believing” (basic contrarianism), which is a simplistic form of disbelief which is one of the few ways that you could believe that is offensive to both the religious and irreligious alike. Like all religions, atheism itself is best practiced with a goal in mind. Not the spread of itself, but the curtail of stupidity and ignorance, the advancement of science and society beyond the confines of moral qualms, etcetera. Yet again, much like

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religion, many atheists would rather ‘convert’ people to their way of thinking through being the ‘loudest’ or ‘strongest’ around. This is illogical and hypocritical; why would you adopt the ways of those who you abhor so greatly?1

1 Refer to the quote at the beginning of the Islam section in Book One.

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Book IV- Philosophy and Religion

The core of any given religion, often not as fluffy and delightful as imagined.

“All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.”

-Ambrose Bierce

Well, now that that nastiness in the last book is behind us and we have emerged perhaps either intensely pissed at either religion as a whole or at me for being such a polemic author, we now move on to an infinitely more flattering section of the book; the section on philosophy.

Philosophy is a combination of two words; Philo-, meaning to love something, and –sophy, pertaining to wisdom; philosophy means ‘Love of Wisdom.’ So, naturally, people would expect their respective religions to have some sort of

‘philosophy’ at their core to hold them together besides greed or submission.

Sure, let’s roll with that one.

The core philosophies of various religions differ greatly beyond what you’d consider the Urreligion, as all are relatively ethical and moral, albeit moderated with divine punishment versus humanly judgment. There are a wide variety of things that certain religions consider ‘moral’ where others may disagree. These variations in ethics can be attributed to the society in which the religion is founded, such as homosexuality being a sin in most major world religions; it

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serves no procreative purpose, and therefore should be prohibited under most ancient doctrine. It is at best a frivolity and at worst an abomination according to ancient religious leaders.

However, the way things sit now, there is no need for such restrictions on the actions an individual practices at home with a consenting partner simply because there are enough people in any given spot in the world that we do not need every individual to procreate in order for our “tribe1” to survive. In this regard, we can say that many types of religious restrictions that were once important to survival can be ‘disregarded’ because of advances in health and overall lifespan across the globe.

1 The connotation of tribe here might imply national, familial, or just plain tribal reproduction.

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IV:I- Philosophies of The God of the Jews

“It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god,

and he's telling them all different things.”

– Billy Connolly

IV:I:I- Judaism

“The problem with Yahweh is that he forgot he was a tribal god.”

– Unknown

The philosophy of early Judaism is a simple one- survival. However, things get more complicated as things progress all the way to when Christianity sprung forth from the loins of Judaism1 in the year 33 AD (supposedly). But, first, we must examine the older versions of Judaism and analyze the evolution from that point.

As I stated earlier in Book Two, Judaism is most likely a haphazard conglomerate between Atenism, Kemetism and Zoroastrianism. However, the way that Judaism had been developed was based upon the current state of things- the Hebrew were slaves, and needed a god to alleviate their suffering. Thus, Yahweh was born- the god of the “chosen race” of slaves. As with the usual, religion can be twisted and manipulated to get others to follow you, and that is likely what Moses did to get the Hebrew to submit to his law. He went before the slaves and said it

1 If Judaism is the mother religion, then the seed that gave rise is Zoroastrianism.

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was Yahweh’s will that the Hebrew be freed from Egypt, and he garnered enough support to where it was viable to cause slave revolts against the Egyptians and give them cause enough to drive the Hebrew from Egypt. Given how readily the

Egyptians washed their hands of the Hebrew, we can assume that they had a plethora of other slaves to call on for labor, which makes it interesting that Moses chose the Hebrew over plenty of other bands of slaves he could have taken leadership of. Perhaps it’s because the Hebrew were monotheistic and were thus the easiest to manipulate via their simplistic (at the time) religion. Perhaps this is even why Akenhaten’s religion was destroyed once he had died and such disrespect had been given to his family.

Regardless, Moses led the Hebrew to a place where he gave them laws

(apparently Mount Sinai), the ten commandments. This is the origin of Hebrew law, the ones that Moses originally brought down from the mountain, and it evolved (or devolved, depending on your point of view) from there. The Ten

Commandments are as follows:

1. I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of

the house of servitude. You shall have no other gods before Me.

2. You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of

anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is

in the water under the earth; you shall not bow down to them nor serve

them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visitng the iniquity of

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the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generations of those who

hate Me, but showing mercy to thousands, to those who love Me and keep

My Commandments.

3. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will

not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.

4. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and

do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God.

In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your

male servant, nor your female servant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger

who is within your gates. For in six days the Lord made the heavens and

the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day.

Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.

5. Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the

land which the Lord your God is giving you.

6. You shall not murder.

7. You shall not commit adultery.

8. You shall not steal.

9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

10. You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your

neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox,

nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.”

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The interpretation of these commandments in pretty clear-cut in terms of what it meant to the Hebrew, but I will break it down commandment by commandment.

1. A variety of religions springing up against the Hebrew would naturally

cause strife and religious wars; having a unified religion would be both

easier to enforce by the government and less problematic for the tribe.

2. Once again, this is a unification thing. Also, this could be seen as a

conservation of resources, not wasting precious gold, marble or other

such exquisite items building idols.

3. This one is odd. The only way I can think to interpret it is that it ‘waters

down’ the religion that binds the Hebrew together, and might cause

dissent among the ranks between the more zealous and the less devout.

4. A little rest is good every now and again. Overworking leads to all sorts of

complications, but at the same time too much rest can lead to laziness.

5. A family unit where the child honors their parents is a healthy one; the

healthier the family unit, the less likely it is to decay and as such bring

about all sorts of unnecessary problems upon the household.

6. Self-explanatory. Murder thins the ranks of what could otherwise be a

mighty army.

7. Adultery splits up families, spreads venereal disease, and all sorts of other

delightful stuff. Better to avoid.

8. Stealing, once again, leads to poor distribution of resources. Or better,

depending on your outlook. Moses took to the former opinion, apparently.

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9. Pointing the finger causes schisms among an otherwise unified populace;

the last thing the Hebrew needed was to be pitted against eachother.

10. Coveting, once more, leads to all sorts of nastiness, including assault,

murder, adultery… etc. All of it is better to be avoided.

While I may step on a lot of toes in the last book, it would seem that (on the other hand) agreeing with most of the Ten Commandments is a relatively innocuous thing to do; who wants to have people running around murdering, stealing, having sex with a person not their significant other, etcetera?

Anyhow, as with most of the commandments, the general idea here is keeping the Hebrew unified under one banner so as not to cause strife and schisms between the various factions that may arise between the twelve tribes. Unified they were, as they eventually invaded the land of Canaan, destroyed Jericho and countless other cities, and settled there themselves in several cities and towns.

All this was made possible by the Hebrews’ commitment to their laws and unification underneath the banner of Yahweh.

The monotheism that the Hebrew had united under had proved a useful tool, and as such gave them the wherewithal to beat back several invaders that posed a major threat to them. However, later in the book of Exodus (post-law giving) and further on in the Old Testament, Judaism became quite derailed. A lot of the laws, while understandable for survival, were written by tribal leaders and

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forbade such things as homosexuality, eating cloven-hoofed animals, eating shellfish, witchcraft and other such activities1. At the time, these things were seemingly necessarily for the survival and unification of the Hebrew tribes, but people still look back on these Old Testament laws and find them applicable to daily non-Hebrew life (Christians, mainly) and use them to justify all sorts of antiquated notions of what we consider in the modern world to be nothing sort of silliness.

Now, while Hebrew monotheism had been based off of the various Egyptian religions mentioned earlier, it had relatively little contact with other major religions

(i.e. Zoroastrianism, Greek paganism, so on) due to the xenophobia2 of the

Hebrew people. However, their enslavement by the Babylonians and later freedom under the Persians exposed them to Baal and Ahura Mazda, respectively, and as such changed their perceptions on Yahweh drastically. Their exposure to the Babylonian religion and their lore influenced several books of the

Bible (however, most of them are Apocryphal, sadly), and the exposure to

Zoroastrianism basically led to the heresy of the mixing of Judaism and

Zoroastrianism known as Christianity. Judaism became derailed (and perhaps rightfully so) from the strict adherence to old Hebrew law by the common Jew

(minus the priesthood), but due to the policy of religious tolerance in place in the

Persian empire, Judaism was not extinguished then and there, and while several

Hebrew likely converted to Zoroastrianism and remained in Persia, it would seem

1 I guess homosexuality isn’t an activity, really… 2 Hey, if I believed I was a member of a chosen race, I’d probably look down on outsiders, too.

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as though the vast majority of them remained Jewish and returned to Israel once they were given the opportunity to do so. During this period came the mixing of

Hebrew and Zoroastrian scriptures, involving such things as the idea of a

‘messiah,’ (based off of Hushedar, Hushedarma,1 and Saoshyant). Jesus claimed to be the messiah (and is, in Christian tradition), but Jewish tradition holds that the messiah will leave no suffering in his wake and be the harbinger of an apocalypse the likes of which the world has never seen. As with their cultural sort of religious worship, they believe that the messiah will be a devout Hebrew and as such make Judaism the religion of the world. I never really understood this- if salvation is yours to command, why let other civilizations join in? Maybe there actually is some truth to a worldwide redemption.

I do not find the Jewish god so reprehensible as the Christian or Islamic versions; rather, he is a reflection of a specific environment to survive, much like many gods at that time. However, the problem that I do have with their god is that their strict adherence to their laws did not let them open their eyes to the heresy that presented itself in Jesus and his apostles. They thought they were just garden- variety madmen, nothing that required special attention. I would have you remember this: a heretic is more dangerous than a man armed with nuclear weapons. A nuclear weapon can destroy a city; a heretic can destroy societies.

1 Also known as “Aushedar and Aushedar-ma,” respectively.

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IV:I:II- Christianity

“A Christianity that is in conflict with the Scriptures isn't Christianity at all.”

– Randall Terry

Wait… there’s such a thing as Christianity that’s not in conflict with the scriptures? Gasp.

Just kidding, but in all honesty my perceptions have led me to believe that the level of love and inner peace that is supposed to be practiced by Christians is actually more common among populations who do not preach it as law.

Surprisingly (or maybe not, depending on who you are), perhaps the most

‘chilled-out’ group of people I’ve ever had the pleasure of associating with was the Wiccans in this area. “Suffer not a witch to live,1” eh?

Well, naturally, Christianity evolved from Judaism and Zoroastrianism blended together; however, it would seem as though the vast majority of the teachings are simply Zoroastrianism preached from a Jewish slant. As I pointed out in Book two, most of the ‘good’ teachings are simply Zoroastrian principles preached from the point of a man who (supposedly) claimed to be god. I suppose that, while the prophecies of the various Zoroastrian saviors are fewer in nature, they are also harder to manipulate to make one seem like the messiah. However, if a child is

1 Exodus 22:18. Also, I use this quote because it has significance in Book six, Chapter six, Subsection six.

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born in the tribe of David, there’s already one prophecy fulfilled- why not go for the gold?

Oh, wait. That’s because you’re supposed to be given titles like ‘Messiah’ posthumously, because you haven’t fulfilled all the prophecies yet and there are some regarding your death. When you go around and spout that you are god incarnate and “the prophecies say so,” naturally, people will want you dead for heresy. And die he did, of a big ol’ tumor on his lung. But hey, regardless of whether or not he actually *did* resurrect a few days later, that’s not how you approach the situation. I could sit here and say that I’m Maitreya Buddha all day long, it doesn’t make me any more of a Buddha than it would otherwise. Now, other people can proclaim that you are the Messiah, Maitreya, or what have you simply because you are in the process of fulfilling a prophecy or two, but claiming the title of “prophet” or “messiah” of some sort seems like arrogance in the supreme. As such, right off the bat I have a problem with Christian philosophy, and subsequently Islamic philosophy. Maybe even Zoroastrianism, but I do not believe that Zarathustra ever asserted he was any more than mortal.

Regardless of that mini-rant, Christianity is an odd hodge-podge of a very xenophobic and tribalistic religion with a very open-minded and accepting religion. Had I known nothing of Christianity before researching Zoroastrianism and Judaism, it would likely make more sense to discern where half of the teachings that Jesus came up with came from. While they may seem original,

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many of them are either directly or indirectly plagiarized from Zoroastrianism. At least Jesus gave some credit when he used Jewish law to reinforce his ideas.

Jesus seems to cherry-pick which Jewish parts of the Old Testament that he wanted to follow to reinforce his type of morality. He kept the Ten

Commandments, despite saying that old Hebrew law did not apply to him because he was “the Son of God,” and various other things he decided to pick up along the way.

So, this brings us to this question: While clearly not true (given the opium situation), was Jesus actually delusional enough to believe he was the Son of

God, or was he just using that to manipulate people to his own ends? What sort of manipulation would one need that sort of authority to accomplish?

The answer is simple on the first part: even if you were so severely delusional as to believe yourself to be a deity, the only reason you’d go around telling people that you are if you aware that it is heresy is if you wanted to manipulate them to an end. This leads us to the second part- you would tell people you are the Son of God to get them to lend you more credibility, or even to obey your every word without thinking. That, I believe, is why Jesus spread the word that he was the

Son of God. He wanted obedience. He wanted to live forever vicariously through his religion, as he likely told his disciples who concocted some story about him being resurrected and literally living forever.

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Jesus and his followers, to their credit, did not demand much minus their own vicarious immortality. They did demand the income of some followers simply to take care of their expenditures of living like hermits, but other than that their initial reign of terror was not really all that terrible.

The apostles speak of Jesus speaking only in parables, which I believe in modern language we would call ‘using ambiguous speech’ or ‘being cryptic.’

There is very little direct commandment that comes forth from Jesus’ mouth during his recorded lifetime, but then again, that may just be the way that the apostles recorded it.

This all may be invalidated by the way that the apostles recorded it, but at the core it does make some tiny shred of sense, so even if you do not believe that

Jesus ever lived, humor me for just a moment. As it is said, the burden of proof lays upon the one making the outrageous claim, and here the outrageous claim is that ‘Jesus never existed.’ The simple fact that there exists documentation from four (if not more Apocryphal) accounts of the same man would seem to point that way, and so far I have seen no convincing evidence that Jesus did not exist, only simple and foolish contrarianism from the mainstream way of thinking.

Such contrarianism (and blind clinging to it) is even more irritating to me than the mainstream way of thought that the contrarians differ from much of the time.

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Mini-rant two aside, I think I’ve relatively well established that, unless I receive overwhelming and infallible proof to the contrary, that Jesus existed and behaved somewhat in the manner which the apostles describe. While many people will ascribe the spread of Christianity in such a rapid and electric way to stupidity of the lower class, I disagree. I believe that people are more perceptive than they are given credit for, perhaps even more than they realize. People, especially the lower class, fear dying without leaving any legacy in many cases. As such, they cling to religions that teach that they can have eternal life so that they will not have to face death, be it the afterlife or not, in a permanent and void-like manner.

They wish immortality, much like Jesus and his apostles- that is the core of

Christianity. A wish for immortality.

After all, who doesn’t want to get into heaven? If people were capable of telling exactly what they needed to do to get into their respective heavens, I can guarantee you that there would be very few people who overshot their quota in a positive manner, but just as many sinners and heathens as there are currently.

Christianity, Catholicism and its offshoots particularly, preach fear of damnation if they do not follow their way of doing things to a ‘t.’ The way that salvation and damnation has evolved in Christianity has led to an irreversible version of most afterlives where you are punished for your sins and rewarded for your virtues.

They really upped the ante with this one- this not only showcases the Christian desire for immortality (in a positive fashion), but the fear of damnation. What a strange combination- Immortality and fear. Why, it almost sounds like a

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regression of religion. It sounds like self-consciousness to the extreme, where you believe you should deserve to live forever, but you still fear damnation because of the possibility that you might fall short of the ‘line of salvation.’

Christian interpretation of the Bible, however, is so varied and differing across even two different churches, much less denominations, even so less across the entirety of Christendom. It is difficult to show what any given major faction of

Christians believe, much less generalize as a whole. Generalization, while sometimes necessary, does not quite get the job done and really serves no purpose except to bridge time here. I have no desire to generalize here, as I may record falsehood in my attempt to be quick in writing.

There is apparently Biblical justification for everything to killing homosexuals, witches, pagans, those who sacrifice humans to benign things like not eating pork (which hardly anyone adheres to). Although, apparently, the Apostle John

(different from the one who lived in the lifetime of Jesus, or so I assume) ate some sort of psychedelic plant he probably shouldn’t have and tripped balls for several hours and saw some crazy, whacked-out stuff. We call his recorded account ‘The Book of Revelation,’ which seems to clearly be a drug trip to me.

Not to mention, when traveling abroad (as many Christians did in that day), knowledge of the local flora and fauna is lacking in a traveler, and they will eat a seemingly benign plant (or, if I am correct, mushroom) and suffer the effects afterwards.

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I always found the Book of Revelation to be quite humorous solely because people take it so seriously at certain parts, but at different parts they call it a

‘metaphor.’ Gee, I wish I could cherry-pick (a common term when discussing

Christianity in my mind) stuff like that to justify anything I believe to someone else and give it some sort of ethos backing (credibility) instead of having to use logos backing (logic).

The problem I have with eschatology (end-time prophecies and so forth) is that people may refuse to act on what may seemingly be a threat because “it doesn’t fit in with the prophecy.” You know, if the prophecy says your town will live forever but you have a warhead with a multi-megaton yield coming towards your town, I’d probably do something about it, or at least leave if you are incapable of doing anything about it. Faith is great and all, but not that much faith.

In summation, the basic philosophies of Christianity are immortality through faith and fear of hellfire. These two have caused countless problems across the centuries that they have been in place because of the way they were instituted (a heresy to Zoroastrianism and Judaism), and perhaps because of the way they were perceived and thusly instituted, they have been a much more flawed and imperfect way of belief than many others that have been around both before and since, in my opinion.

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IV:I:III- Islam

“Islam in its original form was tough and hard, not weak and pliable.”

– Abu Bakar Bashir

This pretty much explains Islam at a glance, except for the fact that Muhammad proved that his laws were flexible at one point. Much of the Islamic community takes Muhammad’s word as infallible and as such model their lives off of their dear prophet’s. However, Muhammad was capricious, wrathful, and just insane in the worst way. He was very manipulative and took basically what he believed would fit the situation and had a “visit from Gabriel” and magically his words held divine weight. So, without further ado, the desire of Muhammad for all his followers can boil down to one word, which is very cut and dry, and every Muslim already knows; submission. What Muhammad wanted was an army that would unquestioningly follow his every order and whim, a community that hailed him as a demi-god. He wanted solace, he wanted himself to feel better because he knew that he was flawed.

His temporal lobe epilepsy likely made him have delusions and thoughts that are difficult to explain, but then again, it may not have; every case is different.

Muhammad could have had some but not all of the symptoms, delusions being one particular one that would not seem to be there. However, it can still be said that there is evidence to that point- Muhammad, much like Jesus and the

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Apostles, had moral preoccupations, and I assume the main one, much like the

Christians was immortality; but not for everyone. Muhammad did not care for his followers, as he led them into wars and got them slaughtered regularly.

Muhammad cared for the immortality of him and his line; he wanted people to worship him, obey him, never forget him. However, this wasn’t good enough for our buddy Muhammad- he secured his family in a seat of power as well by putting his offspring in seats of priesthood in his religion. Not only was

Muhammad obsessed with his own vicarious immortality, he wanted every member of his line to be served like a king as well.

Therefore, it is likely that Muhammad’s TLE had affected his thinking to a point of major fault at this moment in time, and as such shows that mental decay that inevitably occurs with TLE when untreated. This only furthers the claim that

Muhammad did indeed have TLE, and further explains his actions. However, it does not explain the preoccupations with immortality that it would seem Islam and Christianity share.

Judaism is based mainly on survival, but it would seem that the corruption of

Zoroastrianism somewhere created the idea that immortality is a cause worthy of the prophets. The leaders themselves preached that those who most closely followed their words would go to their various heavens, but they themselves were so afraid of losing their earthly legacy that they went to extremes to achieve permanence in this world. I don’t know what this tells you, but it tells me that they

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were just pulling it out of their ass in order to manipulate the masses. Where did this behavior come from? While Moses may have practiced this same type of manipulation, he never made false promises that he could not keep. Certainly, when he screwed up on some level, he blamed it on the unfaithfulness of the

Hebrew, but did he ever use the idea of salvation to manipulate them? Not as to my knowledge. Salvation from Egyptian slavery, perhaps, and debt to him because of that, but he made no promises of those who died in his service or for what they believed anything better than your garden-variety believer.

Well then, what of Zarathustra? Once again, I do not recall there being any particular selfishness or attempt to manipulate people in Zoroastrianism, but I could be wrong. If it did come from Zoroastrianism, it is likely from the later corruption that the Persians practiced at the time of Jesus. As such, Christian theology had not evolved much (as per the usual with such stagnations), and

Bahira taught Muhammad the tenets of Christianity. I believe Muhammad was an incredibly talented and smart individual, and that’s why he was so dangerous as a leader- he saw directly to the core of Christianity very quickly, if not immediately. He realized that he could use that same sort of idea to manipulate people to follow him, except he realized that he could use force to spread his religion over passivity.

I’ve heard the phrase “Islam is peace” countless times, but I’ve also heard two other phrases that seem to fit the situation: “Talk is cheap” and “Put your money

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where your mouth is.” Islam is war. Islam is strife. Islam is the attempt to subjugate the outsiders and ostracize them so heavily from the community until the convert to Islam that it borders on corruption (if you don’t see it as corruption already). Islam most certainly is not ‘peace.’

I’ve also read my Qur’an and I do recall Muhammad talking about being peaceful, but this seems to be a case of “Do as I say, not as I do.” Muhammad was every bit as much of a hypocrite as the drugged-up disciples were. Granted,

Muhammad was much more subtle about the way he went about things due to what I believe was a remarkable amount of intelligence that he possessed, but nonetheless an evil deed and legacy is still an evil deed and legacy, no matter who it comes from.

In summation, the various tenets of Islam are basically ways to keep the populace subservient to Muhammad and Allah, quell all dissent, and spread like a virus across the world.

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IV:II- Philosophies of Zoroastrianism

“He is known to me here who alone hath heard our commands, even

Zarathustra Spitama; he willeth to make known our thoughts, O Mazda, and

those of the Right.”

–Ahunaviti Gatha

As we lack much of Zoroastrian doctrine beyond Zarathustra’s actual teachings in the Gathas and subsequent interpretation and declaration of creed (so on, so forth) in the Yasna and other later books. Now, unlike the other monotheistic religions, it does not seem as though Zarathustra started this religion due to some desire for immortality. While it may indeed still be possible, it does not seem that way.

The way that Zoroastrianism was set up by Zarathustra would seem to indicate that the core philosophy actually is to better your fellow man. As the quote above would indicate, there were several voices that Zarathustra heard and Ahura

Mazda was the main one. The Younger Avesta also claims that Zarathustra had a run in or two with Angra Mainyu (as I mention in Book Two), so it makes it even that much more confusing as to what actually happened in the lifetime of

Zarathustra. Therefore, generalizations over what the religion is actually about are quite difficult. However, we can assert with some legitimacy that there

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actually does not appear to be any selfish end to Zarathustra’s teachings, nor any real fear-mongering, etc.

Zoroastrianism holds several values supreme above all others; these are embodied by the ‘angels’ of Zoroastrianism. There are dozens upon dozens as to what I’ve read, so I’ll outline the important ones as they pertain to the origin of

Zoroastrianism.

First we have the creator, Ahura Mazda. Ahura Mazda is apparently what most people would perceive a monotheistic god as these days; the uncreated creator, the unmoved mover, etcetera. From the chaotic regions beyond Ahura Mazda’s domain came the great and powerful demon Angra Mainyu, and he sought to destroy Ahura Mazda’s creation because he was jealous of it. Of course, this is later lore and Zarathustra makes no mention of it (as to my knowledge), but it helps one understand the general way things in which they were likely conceived of by Zarathustra.

Then we have the Amesha Spentas, the “Beneficent Immortals.” Archangels, if you will. They are as follows.

1. Vohu Mano, “good mind.”

2. Asha Vahishta, “highest asha”

3. Khshathra Vairya, “desirable dominion”

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4. Spent Armaiti, “holy devotion”

5. Haurvatat, “perfection/health”

6. Ameretat, “immortality”

Here we see the values that hold Zoroastrianism together neatly in one place. At least, these are the values that Zarathustra proclaimed his religion possessed… but I see no reason to disbelieve any of these points. Several of the names of these angels are ambiguous translations, but I’ve chosen the more scholarly, I believe.

Zoroastrianism, it seems, is a drive for purity and goodness through all works.

Yes, there may be a threat of hell present there, but Zarathustra himself neglected to mention it; Hell as an idea likely came about from the later clergy of the Zoroastrians. It would seem as though if Zarathustra did speak on the subject of hell, it has been fragmented by passage of time or rendered completely irretrievable.

However, unlike many religions, Zarathustra does detail at length the behavior of both the good and the evil, and the consequences of their decisions. While he does detail that the evil will suffer and the good will flourish, it does not seem he is speaking of the afterlife. Rather, it would seem he is discussing a somewhat

‘karma-like’ concept where your deeds reflect upon your lifestyle either positively or negatively based upon your decisions.

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The way I understand it, even throughout the later days of Zoroastrianism after the clergy got a hold of it and changed it a good amount, there really is no

‘punishment’ for not being a Zoroastrian in the religion, unlike Judaism,

Christianity, or Islam. The judgment of ‘good’ or ‘bad’ in Zoroastrianism is apparently based on your actions, and furthermore the mind in which you do them. If you screw up and commit a sin with best intentions, it would seem the penalties (if there are any) are much less severe. Same with the opposite; if you have malicious intent and end up performing a good deed, your reward is much less bountiful.

As we can tell based on basic linguistics, the idea of “Spenta Mainyu” means

“Good/Holy Spirit” and, while a divine entity itself, is also present in the minds of men. Now, that’s not to say that Angra Mainyu (Evil Spirit) does not also reside in the minds of men and attempt to overcome Spenta Mainyu much as there are arch-demons who counteract and attempt to overcome the archangels in

Zoroastrian tradition.

This would somewhat support the idea that Zarathustra was schizophrenic- he heard a good voice (Spenta Mainyu), a bad voice (Angra Mainyu) and a third voice of guidance (Ahura Mazda). Leaving your family and wandering for ten years in the mountains is not a typical behavior, either. Much like TLE, schizophrenia can cause delusions as severe or worse. A common one is being

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a prophet of God, or even worse, one of being a god. However, schizophrenia is known to actually get better as you age, and furthermore it is not apparent to the schizophrenic that they are diseased. Therefore, all these revelations that

Zarathustra shared with the people of his home town that he was likely told by the voices in his head who, he believed, were angels, a God and demons fighting for his soul. This, while concocted by a man who was quite possibly mad as a hatter, still made very much sense when conveyed to his fellow man, and it even says something about Zarathustra being given the ‘charm of speech’ in the

Gathas.

This would indicate something to me about Zarathustra; he was incredibly intelligent to overcome the constant distractions in his head and deliver such a message of dense subject matter as precisely as he did. Out of all the prophets whom I rank by intelligence, Zarathustra is either at the top or tied with Buddha

Gautama, with Muhammad in a distant third and Jesus and his apostles in a shameful last. I would rank Hinduism, but there is so much information that could be given on various prophets (i.e., Krishna, various swamis, etc.) that it is difficult to rank their intelligence across all sources.

Regardless of whether or not Zarathustra was schizophrenic, he delivered a message to his fellow townsfolk that revolutionized how they (and eventually, pretty much the entire world) thought about monotheism. In this vein, I find it even more amazing that a man who was very likely schizophrenic could

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revolutionize the world in this way; it was not uncommon for people who claimed to hear voices (of gods and demons) to found pagan religions back in the day, but for one to come down and enunciate so clearly what he meant and how things should be done effectively astounds me.

While still focusing slightly upon the spiritual immortality, Zoroastrianism seems to be based heavily upon the consequences of your decisions while still on Earth.

As such, it would appear to be a religion heavily vested in bettering yourself and your fellow man without the fear of going to hell. I find this end much more admirable than asking your fellow man to consider you a god or submit to your every word. As such, I would rank Zoroastrianism as the most ‘enlightened’ of the monotheistic religions. Judaism is not particularly given to self-discovery, rather it is based off of survival and adherence to tradition of your forefathers. In this regard, it is not too different from tribal religion.

Zoroastrianism, the prime monotheistic religion from which all other monotheistic religions are descended and nearly all other religions are affected, has almost certainly been a boon to society as a whole, unlike certain other religions that are rife with corruption and a desire to persist through spreading virulently and forcing itself on others. Zoroastrianism was presented, even back in the day, as a choice; believe what you want to, it changes nothing, so long as your behavior reflects that you are a virtuous person.

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IV:III- Philosophies of the Dharmic Religions

“India alone was to be, of all lands, the land of toleration and of spirituality…”

–Swami Vivekanada

While many Hindu dislike the Buddhists because they consider their religion a heresy against their traditions and many Buddhists dislike the Hindu because they find their religion ‘lacking’ to some degree, there is arguably not that much of a difference between the two. They both hold somewhat similar goals; enlightenment (moksha and nirvana in Hinduism and Buddhism, respectively), coming to a complete understanding of the universe and eventually becoming one with the void from which all chaos and order arise. Those who do not become perfectly enlightened will return again via the process of reincarnation, which if I am correct, is unique to the Dharmic religions (minus a few pagan and tribal religions, if at all) and the status of one in this life is affected by a life that they have forgotten and really are only affected by through the karma that they have built up.

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IV:III:I- Hinduism

“A spiritually illuminated soul lives in the world, yet is never contaminated by it.”

– Swami Bhaskarananda, The Essentials of Hinduism: A Comprehensive

Overview of the World's Oldest Religion

Hinduism, while perhaps the world’s oldest religion, is also among the most ritualistic and difficult to generalize upon. The philosophies of the Vaishnavists and the Shaivites, for example, differ so greatly that there it is nearly impossible to group them together to discuss their similarities. While it may be difficult, it is still worth an attempt to do so.

Let us start with the beginning of the Hindu religion; the Rig Veda, which all of the

Brahmin (the caste of priests in the various branches of the Hindu religion) must read in its entirety1 in order to be inducted into the priesthood, is debatably the oldest religious document in the world (seemingly composed five-to-six thousand years ago) and as such is a very tribalistic and ritualistic document which overviews the various powers, actions and proper worship of their gods. Indra,

Agni and Soma all had different domains and as such were given proper worship in different ways. There are some other gods that are not really worth describing in the Vedas, but Vishnu has an entire book (which, in the scope of the Rig Veda, is very small) related to his worship and the high praises of his followers.

1 Hey, could be worse. They used to have to be able to recite it from memory back in the old days before writing was an implement useful for keeping history/lore.

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Regardless, Hinduism nowadays is very rarely (if at all) practiced with the old gods in mind. Instead, we have Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva (among a plethora of others). The Hindu are relatively peaceful when it comes to the sects getting along, such as Shaivites and Vaishnavites, but differ solely on opinion of who is the ‘supreme God’ (the fight being between Shiva and Vishnu, usually) and, in a sense, can be considered a sort of monotheism. However, there are other gods considered, and as such Hinduism in any form is rarely ever thought of as

‘monotheistic’ by definition.

Vaishnavism is both the definition of Vishnu and his ten main Avatars, more being after Kalki but undefined in literature. The remainder of the Hindu trinity is

Brahma and Shiva, but they are considered lesser; Brahma creates, Shiva destroys, and Vishnu is the one who decides what survives and what does not.

As such, Vishnu could seem to be an embodiment of the principles of evolution.

Shaivites, on the other hand, seek to glorify Lord Shiva and often their sects that they found are often defined as ‘cults,’ and it is very difficult to generalize across all of them. There are several cults that smoke hashish and hemp as a sacred ritual, but common threads among most Shaivites include the reverence of the

River Ganges as holy and the smearing of ash on themselves to show their dedication to Lord Shiva.

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Both Vaishnavism and Shaivism declare that their god is supreme, and often that the opposing god is but an aspect of their own. While the end goal is to gain rank within society and thus build karma to the point of enlightenment (and thus obtain moksha) in both schools of thought, there are so many different ways that the various sects of both schools approach this that it is nigh impossible to generalize across all of them. While there is no ‘universal’ approach to this end, many ways do exist, perhaps foremost in the mind being yoga of various types and meditation1.

The schools of Vaishnavism will differ upon the aspects of their various gods, and while Vaishnavism declares that Shiva is but an aspect of Vishnu, both schools typically agree that one of the duties of Shiva is granting mortals liberation through destruction.

Therein we find the main philosophy of Hinduism; the void. All things came from the void via Brahma, and they return to the void via Shiva. In a sense, time upon

Earth is a trial between being brought forth from the void and returning to it.

However, suicide or many other means that may be considered ‘copping out’ in

Western thought solely add to your time trapped in this existence. Here we see the disparity between the Vaishnavites and the Shaivites- there exists evidence

1 One mantra often used for Vishnu (Krishna) is “Om Namo Bhagavate (Vasudevaya),” and a common one for Shiva is “Om Namah Shivaya.” There exist several other variations of meditation chants, such as “Om Tat Sat” when meditating focusing upon all three of the major gods. The translation of these phrases, while comprehensible, is much more difficult to grasp in many languages not Indian in origin. ‘Om’ means ‘supreme being,’ considered either in a person or a god. ‘Namo/Namah’ means ‘recognition to’ and the prefix Namo/Namah can be seen in the Indian greeting ‘Namaste’ (recognition to you).

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for both sides of the argument, that one should worship Vishnu in order to learn the secrets of existence in order to escape from them, or one should worship

Shiva in order to learn the secrets of Shiva in order to liberate themselves from existence. While the two schools may ‘fight’ for converts, they will generally do so in the non-violent way, so there really is no need to go into the various grievances that could arise from this disparity in the way of thinking.

It seems, however, that in the modern day, many Hindu have forgotten the old ways; they seek material gain and wealth, status in the community, and basically throwing their religion to the wind for more materialistic desires. Hinduism is perhaps the most ascetic-praising religion that there is, and it is puzzling to see how one can indulge themselves so richly and still be considered a ‘Hindu.1’

Why, then, must one amass wealth and so on if they are just to die and reincarnate? Would it not serve more of a purpose to better the world around you instead of focusing on yourself? I do not quite understand what possible motives for greed a Hindu could have besides the common human foibles, but then again, not all Hindu may have the same clarity regarding their religion that I do.

1 See “Deepak Chopra.” I’m not entirely certain what he believes he’s doing when he waters down Hinduism by packaging it for Westerners. The religion was fine as it was practiced in the old days. Yoga was considered meditation what seems like centuries ago, and now in the Western world it’s just a practice for bored housewives to keep their glutes in shape, so on and so forth with many Hindu traditions.

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IV:III:II- Buddhism

“However many holy words you read, however many you speak, what good will

they do you if you do not act on upon them?”

–Buddha Gautama

Buddhism, much like Hinduism, is a simple thing at its core. The main philosophy is the same as Hinduism- rejoin the void from which all life and existence is created. However, there are more nuances and specifications in Buddhism and more guides to reaching this enlightenment than there are in Hinduism. Hinduism seems to be a sort of ‘shot in the dark’ version, whereas Buddhism has a clearer, albeit more rigorous, path to follow to attain enlightenment. This path that must be followed to obtain enlightenment and subsequent bliss in void are as follows:

You must break the ten fetters, which, although stated in Book One, are:

1. Belief in an individual self

2. Doubt and uncertainty

3. Attachments to various rituals

4. Ill will towards others

5. Desire for earthly pleasures

6. Desire for corporeal existence

7. Desire for immaterial existence

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8. Conceit

9. Restlessness

10. Ignorance

Apparently, once this point has been made and nirvana has been reached, it is the individual’s choice to take their Bodhisattva vow or become content in their enlightenment and refuse to help others, as they have earned it. Why anyone would behave this way is beyond me; if you truly are as ‘enlightened’ as you may claim, is it not your duty to teach others so that they too can feel in a similar manner as you? Why not spread the bliss, bro?

Regardless, these are the words of the enlightened Buddha Gautama, otherwise

I would question them more severely and perhaps even berate the asker for asserting something so silly. However, I do believe Buddha Gautama to be at fault in this instance; Buddhist phases of enlightenment apparently take lifetimes

(multiple, because of reincarnation) to achieve, and as such take supreme effort across several centuries, so naturally to the outsider it would appear to be a great task at hand. Perhaps Buddha Gautama threw in that in there knowing that it would be more appealing to outsiders and less off-putting to the various non- believers.

I do not find Buddhism that off-putting, myself, other than the idea that it has become somewhat corrupted (like Hinduism) by inter-religious bickering (once

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more, like Hinduism in the ‘no violence’ aspect) and the ideas that are still very difficult to conceive of in Western thought due to lack of spreading. Now, I would dislike it greatly if Buddhism spread like a virus like Islam or Christianity, but just a little spread is nice. Buddhism spreads very slowly and in isolated pockets and is concentrated mainly on the Indian subcontinent and various surrounding areas

(i.e. Nepal, Thailand, etc.), but in rare cases you will find a Buddhist community in the West not centered around some madman claiming to be Maitreya (which, sadly, is all too common these days). It is still regularly a chore to find a Western

Buddhist who understands the concepts laid out by the Buddha (or even the ten fetters, three jewels or noble eightfold path) properly.

It’s not like it takes any sort of ritual to profess yourself a Buddhist. You’re just sitting there and the idea pops into your head to be a Buddhist… and bam! You are. There is no real initiation ritual like pretty much every other religion out there.

I mean, it helps to not go around telling people you’re a Buddhist without being relatively well-informed about the various core concepts of the religion (or what your silly sheltered brain perceives them as), much like it would help to not be schooled by a Satanist on matters of Christianity. While this is uncommon, when it does end up occurring, it is infinitely amusing to say the least.

Back on track: the core philosophy of Buddhism is Monism- all reality exists at the perception of the individual mind. This does not apply solely to things interpersonal; it applies to both material reality as well. After all, what is ‘real’

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without an individual to perceive it? Your perceptions are as real to you as the guy next to you, whether you are normal and he is blind, deaf or mute and cannot perceive what you can. To the contrary, any given schizophrenic’s hallucinations of things that are objectively not there are just as real to them as anything else around them.

Once again, speaking of mental diseases, the Buddha tends to exhibit the signs of what we may consider ‘mental illness.’ Though he may have spoken very little

(only in the Lotus Sutra, directly, is what I was led to believe), we can take other bits of evidence and take them and apply them to see what sort of disease

Buddha Gautama had, if any.

Now, based on the evidence, I believe at first glance that Buddha had either severe depression or schizophrenia. The schizophrenia is ruled out quite quickly just in terms of typical cases due to the Buddha’s calm and relaxed demeanor, although his staggering amount of meditation could have been like medication for him (back in the day). Regardless, Buddha did not craft theology based on polytheism or even speak of any demons (minus Maya, illusion) at length. The chances of him being schizophrenic seem to dwindle as one delves deeper into his teachings.

The chances of him being depressed, however, are much greater. In Western culture we tend to associate the phrase ‘depression’ with some degree of

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sadness. Sometimes depression does not present with sadness; oftentimes, it does not present with emotion at all. The Buddha’s demeanor and subsequent teachings that embrace basically renouncing all emotion in order to attain enlightenment provide a crucial key to understanding his personality, which was likely heavily influenced by what I perceive to be a relatively severe case of depression.

It would seem as though Buddha did not have any problems maintaining clear thought (another sign that if there is anything, it is depression and not schizophrenia) and maintain his demeanor nearly perfectly everywhere he went.

In many legends, the Buddha showed no emotion whatsoever, and behaved as though he felt no emotion. His appetite was naturally very diminished after his episode with the ascetics in his early adult years, but it may also have been his body playing tricks on him through the various machinations of the mind/body link known as the Limbic System. Losing interest in everything is a common thing among the depressed, and Buddha did not seem to have much desire to do anything besides wander from place to place and teach his teachings. While he may have had a case of depression, there is no doubt that Buddha had a strong dedication to his teachings and treated them as dearly or even moreso than his most devout follower.

This theory, unlike the other ones of opium addiction, temporal lobe epilepsy and schizophrenia, seems slightly shaky to me. It would make sense that Buddha

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was depressed based on the way he laid out his teachings and how he apparently felt no emotion whatsoever, but depression is a thing to be tested, not a thing to be observed. I sadly cannot conclude decisively whether or not Buddha

Gautama was ‘mentally ill’ under modern definitions like mostly all other prophets.

So, if you would follow Buddhism, remember this: Buddha went ahead and laid out the way to the void for you. The way to the void may as well be a massive freeway for as easily as it can be attained in the machinations of Buddhism.

There is one simple thing to remember when keeping Buddhist practices in mind:

Why is it that you must feel? Is there some reason that your emotions cloud your mind instead of you being capable of using your reason? Why do you chase things based on illusions that only lead you further into the trap that is material existence?

Buddha says: Renounce your material existence. Return to the void. Join me.

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IV:IV- Philosophies of the Nahua Religion

“As for our gods, we have a few too many to be true.”

–Pierre Cornielle

While I may discuss how difficult it is to generalize over religion in earlier passages contained within this book, it is has never rang truer than right here with the Nahua religions. The simple philosophies themselves are intellectually exhausting trying to find, much less explain, and furthermore generalizing over the many, many sects makes it that much harder. Well, that aside, let’s start with the Aztec then!

The Aztec religion is based upon, like many other tribal religions- survival.

However, it was in the process of developing past these crude confines when our righteous pioneers of immortality came and snuffed out the religion as a whole.

Perhaps I should clarify; the Mayans were progressing as a religion. The Aztec had become some sort of bloodthirsty pseudo-religion based upon human sacrifice to their various gods who corresponded to stars and natural events. I can imagine the Toltec and various other tribes in the region were more prone to giving into the Aztec way of worship; that is, better to dispose of prisoners by cutting out their hearts and so forth in order to appease the gods. The Mayan seemed to shy away from sacrifice except when absolutely necessary (i.e.

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Tezcatlipoca’s yearly sacrifice), and were instead more involved in other aspects of their all-pervading religion. Even math and science were somehow woven into their religion, and it led to all sorts of wonderful stuff going on in the empire. Their architecture and infrastructure (roads, canals, what have you) were remarkably advanced for their time, and they were arguably more astrologically advanced than any civilization in the Old World was at the time.

I often hear that the downfall of the Aztec civilization was the diseases that the

Spaniards brought with them and their resultant genocide based upon their religion. However, from what I can tell, the Nahua were close to actually exterminating contagious disease from their society. Those with chronic/genetic illnesses were chosen to be priests of Tezcatlipoca should they be seen as fit for the position, but disease was not given that much ‘divine weight’ as far as I could tell. Rather, I believe the Nahua believed disease to be something to be held in balance with the rest of life, as it is a natural thing. However, undue disease and pestilence serve no purpose but to cut short otherwise productive lives, whereas due disease will cause the end of an individual’s life after a fulfilled and productive life (hopefully). I believe the Nahua saw the difference and as such sought to control plagues and outbreaks, but not necessarily a cure for every little ailment. However, in stark contrast to other regards in which I hear the Nahua were deficient, I have heard very little in regards to their medical practices. This causes me to speculate that while they may not have had a perfect remedy for every ailment, they did have a medical system that was ‘good enough.’ I also do

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not recall any Spaniards singing the high praises of the Nahua medicine either, so I’ll just leave it at the ‘good enough’ for now without trying to push it any farther. However, I might throw it out there that the Aztec had no idea what three- quarters of the diseases were that the Spanish brought with them, and as such had no idea how to treat them. I just thought I’d throw that out there to be fair.

Back on subject; the core philosophy of the Nahua religions are an understanding of the world around you through your perceptions. Hey, that sounds very familiar. Almost… scientific. But, that can’t be! Science and religion must exist as polar opposites! Well, that’s what I’m told by the vast majority of idiots who are extremists on either side of the religious/atheistic spectrum.

Be that as it may, the Nahua somehow found a way to blend together scientific and mathematic discovery with a religion. Now, it’s not exactly scientific to cut out someone’s heart to make the sun rise because of a legend, but there is bad science and good science. Bad science is more of a ‘causation vs. correlation’ in this case, and good science is abstaining to see cause and effect.

However, look at their calendar. It not only keeps track of days, it keeps track of years, months and increments of time much larger. Their counting system on their calendar went up to intervals of sixty-three thousand years (and this is just one of these intervals, mind you) instead of just ‘one year’ like on the conventional calendar.

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Could it be that all these patterns in things they saw were from the ayahuasca? Is this why the Maya (closer to the ingredients needed for ayahuasca, less trading and diffusion of ideas necessary) were arguably more advanced than their other

Nahua brethren? Perhaps. Like so many other conclusions I reach in this book, I suppose I must offer evidence. So be it.

While, as I said in Book One, there is still much to be decoded about the Mayan lifestyle and religion, there are basic ideas that we might liken to ancient

Hinduism in nature. It would seem as though the Mayan were coming to a point of having an all-powerful god who presided over everything and was really more of a ‘creator’ and less for intervention. The ancient Hindu did profuse amounts of the drug soma, which was a borderline hallucinogen, and their religion turned out the way it did; mostly religious and cultural advancement, very little scientific advancement (at first).

Mayan civilization, however, was not given the luxury of being put in a sheltered subcontinent filled with lush jungles and rivers and so on. There was war, and it was a reality of life. The other descendants of the Olmec fought to obtain sacrifices and exploit the weaknesses of their neighbors in order to obtain wealth, while the Maya, it would seem, were just budding in their efforts to extend beyond their technological and social impairment due to the lack of technology that was necessary in the Old World simply to survive, such and bronze and iron

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weaponry and armor. After all, why have metal weapons when obsidian cuts just as well and is abundant across much of the region? Why have metal arrowheads when stone pierces just as well? Why have guns to hunt when you have atlatl?

The civilizations in the Old World arose out of necessity, mainly out of necessity to survive; first, it was to survive the environment in which they lived, but second it was to survive against their neighboring nations. Much of a period of what we would have normally considered ‘technological advancement’ in the New World did not occur simply because survival was more viable here in the New World with the use of such natural goods like obsidian and flint. The culture evolved in such a way that the only real threats that needed to be addressed and subsequently survived against was attacks from neighbors and food shortages.

Once again, the Nahua came up with ways to do both. The Maya perfected many farming techniques and the Aztec came up with shock troopers (skull knights and

Shorn Ones being first and foremost), and considering that eventually one side of the globe would become more advanced and eventually take over the other side, it can be seen as inevitable that the Aztec and Mayan empires would fall like they did. However, it was done in such a fashion that the genocide of the Nahua is the only real ‘complete’ genocide ever performed, which annihilated their culture and their religion.

Who knows where the Nahua religion could have gone if it had been allowed to persist? Likely the route of Hinduism. It would make me chuckle to see a man

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clothed in jaguar skin preach Buddha-esque words, but I do honestly believe that’s the path it would have taken; forget your immortality, let’s take a trip to the void!

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IV:V- Philosophies of the Urreligion

“All theory, dear friend, is gray, but the golden tree of life springs ever green.”

–Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Well, the Urreligion, being an idea that is basically mine to play with as I see fit, I think I’ll just take varying ideas from different religions and slap them together haphazardly! Oh wait, I’m not Muhammad or Jesus…

As I stated in the first book, the Urreligion is the religion that all others are descended from (or so I see it), and as such has to at least make sense in the regard that all other religions could be from it.

I have shown way that religion progresses from its foundation to its pinnacle (I should hope) earlier in this book, so I can lay it out in phases for you here.

Now, this is the religion from which all others are descended, descended being the keyword. There are offshoots and mutations and all sorts of good stuff as there would be in a line of genetic descendants. The characteristics follow this general pattern as they evolve:

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1. The religion is concerned with survival. Rules are laid down for some sort

of permanence of the tribe/race who follows this religion, giving them

peace of mind.

2. The religion is concerned with explaining the natural world. Gods and

demons are invented to explain naturally occurring phenomena to

adherents, giving them peace of mind.

3. The religion is concerned with morality. More rules are laid down to ensure

the proper behavior of the adherents, and thus peace of mind.

4. The religion is concerned with immortality. Adherents are given moral

rules to follow and consequences for their actions and an explanation of

the afterlife, giving them peace of mind.

5. The religion is concerned with enlightenment. Adherents are typically

encouraged to enter a sort of ‘oneness’ with reality, often identified as

some type of void. Ultimate peace of mind.

Think of this as a five-tiered pyramid1, with the base being number one and ascending upwards from there. If the basis of survival in that religion is wrong, then none of the adherents will survive, and thusly step two will not occur. As such, if any level beneath the one above it is unsatisfactory or unstable in any way, it is likely that the final result will be flawed and inevitably collapse.

Christianity, Islam and Zoroastrianism only reach number four on the pyramid because they have contented themselves to be human and not aspire to what

1 Those of you who know what Maslow’s Hierarchy is will find this eerily reminiscent, and rightfully so.

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some may consider godhood/Buddha-hood. This is understandable, and the basis for immortality had never been laid before in Zoroastrianism, and

Christianity and Islam simply took Zoroastrian ideals and crafted their own religion based off of it.

Thus, based off of the ‘Urreligion pyramid,’ we can see that Hinduism made a drastic jump after explaining the natural world to giving morality and immortality.

Perhaps we can ascribe this to Zarathustra and the spreading of the ideals of

Zoroastrianism across the Old World. However, the idea of reincarnation based on karma is something that is new to the Hindu and was not concocted by

Zarathustra, or so I believe. Therefore, we have the answer to the question of immortality. So, thus, we move on to the stage of enlightenment. Hinduism is very vague concerning enlightenment, so naturally we have Buddhism spring forth from the loins of Hinduism in order to give a more logical and coherent path to enlightenment. Thus, based off of the pyramid of Urreligion, we can say with certainty that Buddhism is the most ‘advanced’ major world religion around today.

We can consider Buddhism not only a child of Hinduism, but a grandchild of

Zoroastrianism, which is a child of some pagan religion whose name history did not bother recording, etc. The point is that there is very rarely a religion that just

‘springs up’ with no precedent in one of the later stages of development. By

‘rarely,’ I mean that in my many years of research I have never seen it happen once.

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People can make all the wild and audacious claims they please, it doesn’t change the fact that their religions are not usually entirely genuine divine revelations that skip steps in development. That’s not to say that people can’t see ahead, it’s just that the vast majority of people will be set in a certain way and be difficult to budge unless they are given a certain stimulus regarding the situation that they are in.

Now, hence cometh an interesting idea. When a religion hits phase four or five,1 typically ideas of a messiah become apparent in holy texts. In phase four, there are typically ideas that are race or tribe related (i.e. “Our savior…”), whereas in phase five the messiah is shown as a universal messiah (i.e. “The savior…”). Of course, this is based off of only five end-time prophecies, but all of the other characteristics line up very nicely. Therefore, the concept of the Empty One in the Urreligion should be based mostly off of Maitreya Buddha, less on Kalki, and even less off of Saoshyant, the Second Coming, and Imam Madhi.

Admittedly, the higher-tier religions are harder to come across in the grand scheme of things because they contend with each other and tend to exterminate branches within themselves that could eventually become separate religions, but strangely enough it would seem as though the phase five of religion is the end-all and be-all, as I have yet to see anything that is even close to phase six, whatever that may be. In fact, most offshoots of Hinduism and Buddhism that I have seen

1 Phase four religions include Christianity, Islam and Zoroastrianism. Phase five religions only include Hinduism and Buddhism. Judaism, sadly, is only a phase three religion, but very close to a phase four. Let’s call it a phase 3.5 religion.

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have actually been aberrations in the progress of the religious sequence; they have been backwards. They are usually a result of breeding Islamic religious ideas with one of the two, and it comes out quite strangely. Think of it as a horse and a donkey breeding a mule.

So then, we can take the Urreligious philosophy from the table above and apply it to whatever phase a given religion is in to figure out where it was last phase and where it needs to go next phase. Naturally, the religion as a whole rarely ever evolves in such a way (the one and only example that comes to mind being

Hinduism) from one phase to another; usually it takes some manner of prophet or some such in order to rustle up the status quo.

Further, it gives a sort of hierarchy for individual development; one fully complete a base level to completely fill one above it, so on and so forth until you’ve hit the end of phase five. As for the immortality part, there are a number of ways you can go about that, but the typical ‘breaking the cycle of reincarnation’ or ‘dead sure awaiting heaven’ might do you just right.

But, to bring the rather brief Book Four to a close, I say that the Urreligion (still) displays quite accurately where every religion comes from and gives us proper classification for the various waypoints at which any given religion could be and guidance for where it should go. This guidance does not stop at the level of the masses; rather, as the masses are a collection of individuals, and as such the

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Urreligious pyramid can be applied to an individual seeking religious or just general guidance in life.

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Book V- A Look Forward

Because everybody deserves to have a better life.

“Study the past if you would divine the future.”

– Confucius

Now it makes sense why I put the history book before this one, huh?

Anyways, as the quote says, divining the future is not actually that difficult. It is simple enough to pick up on patterns that keep reappearing in human thought and apply them to a given situation. However, it is not always that simple, otherwise all our almanacs would be written with complex algorithms and there would be people endlessly studying a series of numbers that define human behavior.

As to my knowledge, this is not the case. But, in terms of general religious ideas,

I have a decent grasp and can communicate a good amount of it.

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V:I- Worst Case Scenario

“The car is on fire, and there's no driver at the wheel

And the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides

And a dark wind blows.

The government is corrupt

And we're on so many drugs

With the radio on and the curtains drawn.

We're trapped in the belly of this horrible machine

And the machine is bleeding to death .

The sun has fallen down

And the billboards are all leering

And the flags are all dead at the top of their poles.”

-The Dead Flag Blues, Godspeed You Black Emperor!

The worst case scenario for the future, believe it or not, is not annihilation from a nuclear holocaust. That agony is but for a split second, as you incinerate from a fire the heat of the inside of the sun. The worst case future is one where mankind is enslaved; both physically and mentally. This is a world that reminds one of

George Orwell’s 1984, or Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World. Things are currently

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going to a point where both could happen simultaneously, that is to say, there could be a government so malicious that it censors all opinions contrary to its own, but the public is just so invested in their own hedonistic ways that they fail to notice.

However, this is a book over religion. While the government will most likely have something to do with such a horrific future, this is pertinent mainly to the effects it will have on the populace, and more accurately, the religious sector of the populace.

First off, we will have the virulent spread of stupidity. I mean stuff like ‘evolution is wrong because there’s some problem with having God create evolution’ in

Christianity… and much more so. I’ve seen so much stuff like this in the past couple of years due to the flat out stupidity of a large section of the population. I say ‘stupidity’ here because ‘stupidity’ to me means that you have heard the truth and you’ve chosen to defy it because of your arrogance, while ‘ignorance’ means you simply have not heard the truth and speak wrongly because you do not know any better. It is one thing for a person to be ignorant, but for them to be stupid is a whole different matter… and in this particular future, I see stupidity and ignorance, but not much intelligence. In this future, the government basically censors all intelligence and indoctrinates the masses away from the truth anyhow.

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This is a government that is basically a religious institution (but not an ‘official’ one, at least in America, because the Constitution forbids it) that suppresses individual growth instead of encourages it; call it ‘regressive religion.’

Genocide would be a normal occurrence in this world, unless the whole world was under a unified government; perhaps even ‘misdirectional genocide’ to support a cause that would otherwise be unimaginable, but with the stimulus of genocide to the society, it could conceivably come to be. Some conspiracy theorists take events such as the terrorist hijackings on September 11th, 2001 to be such an event. I digress; our government, as of now, is full of bumbling fools who do not possess the wherewithal to do something like that. Also, it’s not

“What they want me to think,” and it is quite frankly disrespectful to tell me that my thoughts are not my own when I have used more logic and common sense than you. Paranoia does not equal ‘enlightenment,’ my friend.

Regardless, this will not be a process precipitated by one event, it will be a slow and silent thing. It’s happening now, actually, but there are forces counteracting it… however, they are dwindling. People are getting more wrapped up in the age we live in, this Kali-Yuga, driven to possess ridiculous numbers of trinkets in order to prove something to their fellow man instead of just having enough for themselves to be comfortable and secure in their futures.

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This, unaddressed by many religions, may be partly due to the fact that stupid people can speak freely without repercussions1 and spread their ignorance to others on this wonderful thing we call “The Internet.” You think writing a book is hard? Try sifting through tons and tons of articles with false information and

‘original research’ that is neither logical nor confirmed. However, this could just be the incredibly overdrive that the world has been kicked into culturally by the use of such a thing that the degradation of society as a whole and culture in general has just kicked up in the meantime as culture spreads.

However, this could be due to many things, most of them originating in America.

Hooray for the Red, White and Blue! People seem to have developed entitlement complexes from the various governments that modeled their constitutions and other legal documents after our very own United States Constitution (and Bill of

Rights), as I have noticed, and people who do not have such rights given to them such as seen in the Bill of Rights during their maturing phase do not have such severe delusions of superiority. A common one I hear in this country is: “You can’t make me be quiet! I have freedom of speech! I can say whatever I want!”

Well, while you may have freedom of speech, if someone is telling you to shut up, you may want to listen to them. Oh, I forgot. You can’t speak out against your government! Oh, also, you can’t speak out against Scientology or anyone with a good team of lawyers! This one’s been enforced great.

1 Repercussions in the sense that you are reprimanded for your stupidity and corrected. I do not believe anyone at all should be censored, but that stupidity should be rooted out and set straight.

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Freedom of speech, while a great thing in theory, is a pretty neutral thing in practice. I justify this statement thus; the above examples fit in, but the point I was going to make is that people can use it and abuse it like any constitutional right (such as lawmakers citing the ninth and tenth amendments to suit their points of view), and can thusly spout hatred and stupidity with impunity. I do not mean like the common man, I mean things like school and church indoctrination.

People have their own minds and should be able to come to their own conclusions on all things, not just whether or not they approve of what their government is doing or love Jesus. A parent or guardian doing it out of ignorance is one thing, but when it’s a teacher or a priest doing it when they know full well what they’re telling the innocent is nothing but a load of crap, that’s when it becomes reprehensible and should be punished by law. I go into this later in the

Politics section in Book Six.

Regardless, people will begin relying less and less on logic and more and more on “The government says I can say what I want.” Here’s the thing; you can say whatever the governments likes that comes out of your mouth. If you say something anti-government, it can be classified as sedition, or even worse, as treason. You can actually be charged under this veil of “Freedom of Speech.”

This is but one of many delightful elements of the Constitution that have been twisted and warped in order to give more power to the federal government across the hundreds of years the United States has been in existence. At first it was

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called the ‘Alien and Sedition Act,’ but more recently it has been called the

‘Patriot Act.’

The founders of this country would be sick if they saw what was going in this day and age. Perhaps they’d be a little more tactful in spelling out exactly what it was that they put in the Constitution.

That’s not to say that decay isn’t really the way of things; but everyone seems to forget that in the early legal documents of this country, we are given the right to revolt against oppressive governments. Everyone just sits there quietly when the government enforces more morality and raises taxes without providing more services, and nobody seems to think anything of it. “Surely,” they think, “the government needs to exist!” While it may be a necessary construct as of the moment, it sure as hell doesn’t need to exist ‘as is.’

Without some sort of revolution or at least curtailing of government power- grubbing, there will likely be a dystopian future where the citizens of America (if not the world) are held down and used as intellectual labor by the government, and while people may have advanced degrees, they will be more stupid than ever. They will have extreme nationalistic pride instilled in them by their government, and really see no need for people who are not of their nationality

(unless, of course, they do business with them). They will not listen to those who dissent from their point of view, even if their point is logical. In extreme cases,

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they may take it upon themselves to ‘silence’ the one they perceive as wrong, and the government will thusly offer no punishment whatsoever.

Even as it stands now, justice is a perversion of the concept. The idea is that

‘justice is blind,’ that people who commit crimes are given equal treatment (and equal sentencing!) because justice should be all about equality across the board.

Let me tell you, historically, that has not been true, nor is true today, nor does it show any sign of improving.

Let’s take an example. For fun, let’s make this an example from TV’s Chappelle’s

Show. The joke in this particular section was taking a garden variety crack-dealer and giving him the treatment that they would a CEO who defrauded millions of folks out of a good portion of their income, and vis-à-vis. The crack dealer is given a polite call, reminding him he needs to show up at some point in the near future for a deposition about his crack-peddling. He agrees to a day later than proposed (because he has a deal he needs to do the proposed day), and continues about his business. On the other hand, the CEO comes home after defrauding people to his wife and his dog, and a short while after he gets home he is greeted by a swat team breaking into his house, beating him down and shooting his dog.

The perspective goes back to the crack dealer, who shows up to court in his street clothes and pleads the Fifth (or “fif”) to every question asked of him and he

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gets community service for dealing crack. On the other hand, the CEO is taken to a criminal court and gets the book thrown at him, the judge not allowing him a chance to speak.

This example serves as a role-reversal of the all-too common one that people see; the reason that this one is funny is because it is slightly true. Is not defrauding millions of people a more severe crime than selling crack to a few drug addicts? Why, then, does a drug dealer get years upon years in prison while a CEO gets a slap on the wrist?

Because the CEO has money. Because the CEO can pay for lobbyists. The justice system is not pure; it is corrupt and loves money and all the other base things that can be said of any type of organization with nearly unlimited power.

The entire government is like this! The branches are supposed to check each other, not turn their heads to the side when they try to line their own pockets.

Voting yourself a pay increase in Congress should be scrutinized highly by the other branches. Oh, wait… there’s a pay increase for them in there, too? Hot damn! Screw the common voter and taxpayer, looks like I’m going to a five-star resort this year!

Things show no signs of improving. The government sits by and abides stupidity’s virulent growth, and in some cases enforces it themselves. We sit here

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with our ‘rights’ and believe everything is ok, that we’re better than everyone else because we think we can do all these things that we can’t.

Back on topic, though, religion is one of the things that keeps us stupid and complacent as well… and it shows no signs of stopping. Modern government and religion mirror the other almost perfectly; they both grab up as much power as they can at any given opportunity without tipping their hand to the general public, seek to spread their influence without overstepping their bounds, and desire very little good for the common man, preferring their own money and perks instead.

Namely among the organizations (and by far the biggest religious organization in the world) is the Catholic Church. Now that we’ve established that, we can throw in that many of the folks who practice positions of authority in the church (and government!) tend to have perverted principles,1 even though they are supposedly supposed to be the ones whom we look to for moral guidance. They become more and more perverse as the years go on and they pay no mind to the public’s ‘dissent’ when a scandal comes up. This dissent basically boils down to a little discomfort when the topic comes up and maybe a conversation or two about how it’s “wrong,” but soon enough people immediately forget what they were angry about.

1 Such examples are John Edwards cheating on his wife who was dying of cancer at the time, and Catholic priests sodomizing altar boys. After all, it had been established in one of those councils that a priest having sex with women was a ‘no-no,’ and as such many priests took to poking the altar boys.

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Things cannot continue this way. Otherwise we will be slaves of our own free will to both our religion and our government. We should be controlling them, not the other way around. We should get by on what we need, not constantly seeking more money and thus just becoming nothing more than consumer whores. These are the things that keep us enslaved. They know what it is that we want, at our core, what we need if we have built nothing upon our base desires to move beyond them.

There are so many things threatening to enslave us, and have already begun the process. Our corporations, our government, our religion, all these things that may be fine in moderation but we have indulged in them too heavily. We have put our security in the government for material safety, our religion for immortal safety, and our corporations for material comfort. These things persist because we let them, because we perceive a need for them; and, indeed, until we become educated enough to see past their façades of necessity, we will still be dependent upon them.

If things continue as they do, we will become more and more dependent upon all three until we are helpless without them. Then we will become enslaved, being ruled by what will assuredly be malicious overlords, and all that is valiant and good in the world will be slowly sucked from it until we wish for death… and some “messiah” will grant us that wish with nuclear warheads.

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V:II- If Things Persist

“The distinction between the past, present, and future is only a stubbornly

persistent illusion.”

–Albert Einstein

Now, this is a relatively simple section; it is simply a review of how things currently are and what will happen if they simply persist instead of worsening (the natural way of things) or improving (counter-intuitive).

Most of us are ruled by base things; desires for fancy trinkets, increasingly luxurious levels of comfort, incredible amounts of intercourse, the security of having a mate, manipulating those around us to our whim, etc. However, there are still a good amount who live for something more than just ‘persisting,’ and it is those people who allow us to live our lives as we do who slow (if not halt) the decay of society through attempting to educate the public on various matters, spreading the ideals of the good and behaving as such. It is not simply those who preach that spread this word; a good bit of it is done just by perceiving the courtesy and strength of other individuals. A good bit is done just by inspiring by example.

The reason that society has survived thus far is by having genuinely good and selfless individuals there to counteract all the selfishness, which we may consider

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‘bad.’ In religious context, that means that for every hypocritical jackass who defames their religion, there is one who genuinely wants to better his fellow man and believes that it is his purpose to do so. This is by no means a measure of intelligence, but it is a measure of selflessness, which is a means of measuring wisdom (markedly different from intelligence).

In political context, this is that one politician who comes along once every so often who actually wants to better the country instead of being concerned with the simple prestige of the presidency or the fat paycheck and pension that comes with it. Or, you know, in recent years, corporate lobbying and ‘perks’ (a euphemism for ‘bribes’) have been an additional thing for your average ‘good’ politician to fight against.

As all things are a struggle between good and evil, this would seem to be a relatively likely future. However, it would seem as though the forces of good are becoming tired and worn out, and the forces of evil are gaining a nearly unstoppable army and would mobilize, but their nature is such of selfishness and there is nothing to be gained by crushing the selfless. As a matter of fact, it is contrary to their interests to crush the selfless, as the selfish are beneficiaries of the selfless.

The selfless grow tired. It is ever so often that they need a reminder for why they fight, and there are a select few who give them that reminder, people such as

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Zarathustra, Buddha Gautama, even Jesus of Nazareth. Abraham Lincoln,

Gandhi and Albert Einstein are names that I have heard bandied about, and they do make a good amount of sense. It is the simple belief that you’re not alone when you fight, when you have comrades in arms it makes it so much easier to fight the good fight and not become tired by what you may perceive as lack of success. These are the people who keep us on the path that we are going on, the path beyond the base.

Then, on the other side, we have the selfish. These are the people who pretty much run everything in the world, the various governments, the media, the corporations, the major religions, etc. These are the ones who care not what happens to anyone outside the ones they perceive as ‘worthy,’ much of the time, not any more than a dozen people. They will do as they please and deflect the fact that they are indeed selfish by giving a minimum amount to charities and churches and so forth, but they do not care in the slightest for the ones that they donate to. They only do it to avoid criticisms of their hoarding of wealth. They, to use a catchphrase in the U.S., are the "one percent."

Yet, when such a highly influential segment of the population hoards their wealth to such extremes and does not distribute it into the community, it naturally inspires others to do the same. As such, it is a much higher percentage than ‘the one percent’ who behaves this way, and unlike the Occupy (insert place) movements would have you believe, it is not just the highest one percent of the

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income bracket who hoards their money and has a high influence in the community. Granted, theirs is the heaviest and they are absurdly wealthy most of the time, but they are not alone. It has simple become a catchphrase to attack the top one percent of the income bracket instead of attacking the problem itself: selfishness.

So, without realizing what our true objective is here in this fight, we are doomed to fight it forever. So it is that some of us will fight for contentment of all humanity, and some will fight for it all for themselves.

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V:III- The Revival

“Everyone here has the sense that right now is one of those moments when we

are influencing the future.”

–Steve Jobs

So, as we discussed last chapter, the reality of life so far has been a battle between the selfish and the selfless; but there is hope for the side of the selfless.

If from nowhere else than the simple probability that someone great will arise to advocate peace and charity among the masses among all the false ‘messiahs’ that have been presented to us, we have the relatively reassuring religious idea of the Empty One as presented to us by the Urreligion. The simple idea that such a person exists would motivate people to behave in a better and more selfless fashion if for no other reason than to be made to look less inferior in his shadow.

As was already mentioned in Book One in the case of Maitreya Buddha, Kalki and Saoshyant, they are not the ‘final’ saviors… they will break the dam that holds back enlightenment from the general public and there will be thousands if not millions more saviors in many aspects of life. It will not be ‘one,’ there will be a multitude of saviors in the future. Of course, this really only applies if you are religious.

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Perhaps due to my own bias, I’d like to think that the spread of the Urreligion will herald some paradigm shift in the way that religion is perceived in the popular sector. Maybe I’d even get a few converts, some of them theistic, some of them atheistic. After all, the beauty of the Urreligion is that it can be perceived in either a theistic light or an atheistic light. It’s not like I offer damning doctrine or some sort of silly belief system (though I do go over what happens when you die in

Book Six), so I think it would be infinitely more agreeable than many systems currently in place. Maybe a few agnostic folks would care to join up, who knows?

Regardless of that little blurb, there needs to be some sort of person or idea that the selfless can rally behind in order to increase their numbers, their force, and their influence. If the scales can be tipped in favor of the selfless, we could have another world-wide Renaissance, perhaps something even more drastic and delightful for the world community as a whole!

While it may be exciting to see what the future has in store, it is also important to not get wrapped up in it and maintain a practical outlook. If you sit there and wait for the future without doing anything to improve your situation or that of those around you, you are not particularly worthy of reaping the benefits of a more enlightened future due to your lack of action. As the quote says at the beginning of the Buddhism section in Book Four, how much good will all your belief do if you do not do anything about it, if you just sit back and ‘chill’ because you believe that things will get better without your intervention, you will reap no reward

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besides what others give you, which makes you one of the selfish in the grand scheme of things… which makes you one who is to be fought against in an ideological sense. So, I would have you remember this; if you are going to profess yourself as a follower of the selfless, have your actions reflect it. Do not be another one of those hypocrites that are all too common. I know you dislike seeing it in other people, so do not make it happen in yourself. I end this most brief of books in this set by saying: The future is yours. You decide what will happen, whether things will decay, whether they will improve, or whether they will stay the same.

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Book VI- A Personal Note

A look into the mind of your delightfully tweaked author.

“They call me Mr. Know-it-all, I will not compromise.

I will not be told what to do, I shall not step aside.

They call me Mr. Know-it-all, I have no time to waste.

My mouth is used for intellect, and I have such eloquent taste.

They call me Mr. Know-it-all, I sip the aged wine.

Oh, I could tell such wondrous tales if I should find the time.

I must be Mr. Know-it-all, for ideas they come in bounds.

I am Mr. Know-it-all, so spread the word around.

They call me Mr. Know-it-all, I am so eloquent.

Perfection is my middle name, and whatever rhymes with ‘eloquent.’”

-Primus, Mr. Knowitall

My dear reader, I thank you for being so patient and stalwart in your dedication to reading so far into a book that I am sure must have been quite an ordeal for you.

Now comes the nostalgic autobiographical part of the book, where I whine and whine about my life and how I would like to find a wife and get married before I

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turn twenty five because I am so uncomfortable in my own state of being at the moment.

Wouldn’t it be weird if I was like that?

No, no, I shall not bore you with meaningless sentiment. You’ve had enough of that already, my enduring reader, but I must ask you to bear with my mad ramblings and seemingly irrelevant conjecture. Perhaps you would enjoy a journey into madness itself, and see the face that I see constantly. Perhaps you would like to grasp what had made me so very different, the one that turned away from Christianity, and eventually ended up in his own utterly mad branch of religion where he had not realized those before him had tread. Now, let us begin.

VI:I- My Life Story

“There are gains for all our losses,

There are balms for all our pain:

But when youth, the dream, departs,

It takes something from our hearts,

And it never comes again.”

-Richard Henry Stoddard

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I share with you my life experiences, namely my pain, in order that you may be spared through a knowledge of circumstance that leads to a pain like no other- betrayal, one that I have become all too accustomed to. Should you be so very afraid of it, there’s always outright paranoia and anti-sociability as an answer.

But, perhaps without straying to such an extreme, you can pick up some tell-tale signs from my story.

Do remember- always keep your eyes open. A deceiver does not often change his ways after he is caught.

VI:I:I- The Fall from Grace

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.”

-The Bible, Proverbs 27:6

Now, those of you who have read this far, I assume, are fairly polarized upon the issue of my character. Those of you approve probably think me a great man, confident, intelligent, and perhaps some of you have even idealized me to be handsome. Those of you who disapprove of me probably think me some sick, wretched beast without a soul, bent entirely upon killing the God of the Jews, the

Plagued One.

You know, the digressers are the correct ones here.

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It was so very long ago that God abandoned me, yet I did not realize it. If I had to tag a specific event for losing my faith, I would have to say visiting Dachau and viewing the barbarisms therein proved to me that there was no omnipotent loving god. After that, Christianity seemed dull and empty to me. I persisted upon following it because I was not aware of any other options, living the shielded and stupid life of a typical Christian boy. I walked the path of a Christian blind and dumb, with those around me, whom I thought knew something I did not. It turned out that they were in the same state; charlatans, concerned with the ‘appearance’ of faith rather than the actuality of the matter. I was oblivious to the path I would follow, except for those damnable nightmares, those horrible nightmares…

Thursday, June 29th, 2006- let that read as the date of my death upon my tombstone when I die. What writes in such eloquence before you is nothing but a hollow shell. All that was innocent and caring in me died upon that day. I, the thinker, the writer, the god-killer, am a dead man who still lives, am a collection of particles bound together by an infinite source of energy. It used to be hate, but it changed after a certain experience of mine.

It was just another typical Christian activity- Church camp. Get together with some friends, flirt with some attractive women, eat food made out of cardboard1, so on and so on, ad nauseum. On Thursday, June 22nd, it was the big ‘spiritual

1 The Salisbury steak was still delectable, at any rate. So was the fried chicken. Other than that, it wasn’t that great.

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awakening day’ of ‘profound wisdom’ and ‘miracles,’ as it always is in church camps- the day before it ends. I had asked my friends to be left alone, and I decided to do the same for so many others, whom I assumed shared my enthusiasm for solitude in my prayer. Later, my friends told me that they had found out through a chain of several people that there was one particularly attractive girl who didn’t want to be kept alone that night, whom I had passed at the opportunity to share with earlier, due to her overuse of subtlety/my stupidity.

How different things could have been if I had known. If only I had followed my base lusts and ‘shared in communion’ with her. If I had, nothing would have turned out the same. I would still be stupid, ignorant, and trust the Plagued One.

Thus it was, I wandered around, letting the purest nihilism of something so very meaningless permeate my mind whilst I pondered the ‘deep mysteries’ of the

Bible. I returned to my room before any of my cabin mates, and I had prayed for hours before anyone came in.

When most folk speak of ‘bad experiences at summer camp’ they are referring to figuring out that their bunkmate doesn’t want to be ‘just friends.’ I would have preferred tongue dances with a woman, but even awkward spooning is better than what had been fated to happen.

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During my time of ‘deep reflection’, I had remembered my grandfather Richard

Eberle, whom I had heard spoken so highly of but never known- I was less than two years old when he died of complications from prostate cancer. I shed a tear for my fallen ancestor, and I soon turned my attention to another elder in bad health, my other grandfather- Howard Ronk. I prayed the most heartfelt prayer that I had ever prayed that he be kept alive and in good health until I could muster a proper farewell. He was not in particularly bad shape, but in declining mental condition- he constantly forgot where he was, what he was doing, but it hadn’t quite gotten to the point where he would forget the face or name of my grandmother. She had told us about it on one of her occasional phone calls to my family from across the continental United States. I had always been taught that not saying goodbye to someone prior to passing was probably the worst remorse you could feel.

You know, I’ve been lied to a lot, but that one has to be in the top five.

I cried and cried, being a sentimental boy; I had poured my heart out to God in a desperate plea for a little civility and humanity. After that, being self-conscious, I curled up in a ball and pretended to be asleep as soon as the elder of the cabin came in.

Exactly one week later on Thursday, June 29th, my grandfather died. He didn’t die peacefully in his sleep, either- he had a major stroke, was rushed to the

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hospital, and in horrible agony the entire time. They had him hooked up to several life support machines, and eventually they had numbed his pain enough to tell him what had happened. The stroke was too severe for him to continue living a normal life- he would have to be connected to machines for life support.

They told him this, and he told them that he would rather die. So, they obliged, and he died in the night. He died precisely a week after I prayed for him to live, down to the hour. I recall the exact words I used: “Please let him live until I can say a proper goodbye.”

I found out the next day, while playing a video game on my computer. My parents, ever the sensitive type, informed me of his death by saying “Get off the computer. We need to book a flight to Idaho for your grandfather’s funeral.” I turned around, somewhat detached as most people are when they hear of the death of a loved one, and I said “Really? When did he die?” Last week. “How did he go?” Stroke out of the blue. “Really?” Yes. Pulled his own plug. “Huh.” At that,

I wandered off to a remote corner of my house to think upon it.

Yet again, my parents being attuned to my emotional needs, left me at home alone for a week soon after, nothing but the creeping darkness and oddly sociable spiders to keep me company. Instead of mourning our dead relative, they decided that my little brother should go visit a school friend who had moved to Myrtle Beach, and they should accompany him, because friends and

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hedonism are so much more important than family. That week, I finally realized what had happened, and I had put it all together.

There were poetic words that I had heard through music, and the incredible sorrow packed within awakened me. I have taken the liberty of writing them here for you, noble reader.

“Surrender, and know I’ve failed you.

Now let the darkness swallow you whole.

Nothing could ever compensate

For what I’ve done to you.

Tell me, is there any recollection of a time,

Before the abhorrent smell of death,

Masked all the sugary scents of springtime,

And these apparitions led me astray,

Into the bowels of perdition?

Together, we created a world of sunlight;

Darkness fell as we walked away.

Before an individual so cavalier, yet so depraved,

Laid you down upon the shores of Acheron,

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Before we became immersed in iniquity.

Together, we created a world of sunlight;

Darkness fell as we walked away.

And as we walked away,

The sky, it seemed to turn black.

We did create an environment that’s oh-so-dolent now.

But I’d give anything to change these memories,

Back to reality and return us to the light.

Surrender, and know I’ve failed you,

Now let the darkness swallow you whole.

Nothing could ever compensate

For what I’ve done to you.”

-It Dies Today, The Caitiff Choir: Defeatism

That final verse echoed through my head, and it had finally become clear to me what had happened. I, through trusting God with my grandfather’s life, had killed him through divine means. I had been deceived into thinking that God cared, and could fix any problem, and loved his followers. My god had betrayed me. Not only had I lost my grandfather, my god made me kill my own grandfather. He had

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manipulated me- to this day I still cannot perceive a reason a sentient entity would do something so unspeakably cruel. Was it to drink the nectar of my tears and laugh at my incredible grief, which he had caused? Or, was it a simple deception to get me to trust the life of someone to him, which he quickly snatched up?

Allow me to put this story in secular terms- say that you had a friend whom you had known your entire life, and that entire time he had told you that you could trust him. Then, on one night, you voice a concern about the declining mental state of your grandfather, and tell him all about him. He takes a knife of yours while you’re not looking, and proceeds to your grandfather’s house. While your grandfather is sleeping, he slits his throat- not enough to kill him, of course, but enough to severely damage him. So, once your grandfather is aware of what is happening your friend puts the knife in his hand and makes him kill himself. Now, how would that make you feel?

How easy this would have been to write off if I were atheistic. I would simply shrug and say ‘Oh well, he’s dead. Looks like prayer doesn’t work after all.’

However, I still cannot think in such a way- I still believe that he betrayed me, and my grandfather died because I was so foolish as to trust in him. My indoctrination runs deep, indeed.

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Oh, caring reader, you have no idea the incredible sorrow that overtook me. I did not wash or dress for the next week, and I only got out of bed three of the seven days. I ate one meal the entire week, lying about ‘going out’ and ‘making stuff myself.’ I sobbed loudly at all hours of the night, and luckily for me my older brother was out with friends most of the time, and my grandmother was slightly detached from reality, as she always has been. My faithful dog came in to comfort me, but I bawled so loudly it made him scurry away. After the third time, he did not come back.

After a time, I had become so depressed that I could not even muster tears anymore. I wasn’t hungry. I wasn’t thirsty. My entire reality had shattered, and everything that I had been told since I could understand words was shown to me to be a lie, nothing more. I tried to confide my sorrows in a ladyfriend, and she, being so very gracious and kind, screened my calls after a few days. Ordinarily, I would not blame her, because looking back it was a bit excessive. However, she told all of her friends about what a little bitch I was being, and tried to make herself out to be some kind of ‘victim’ through the whole thing. My universe collapsed, those around me died, I felt pain beyond description- she wanted to use it to glorify herself. I contemplated suicide endlessly, and this harlot sat around and gossiped about how ‘weird’ I was.

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A model Christian, if you ask me. But still, I thank her, for without her I never would have become such a wretched creature, a perversion of nature and an abomination unto her God.

This was nothing, simply another pebble thrown atop a mountain of suffering.

Still, when I was told about this (through a joke, nonetheless) I began to stop feeling so glum. Make no mistake; the emotion that replaced it was not happiness. As the sadness seeped out, it was replaced by rage- rage towards

God, rage towards her, rage toward anyone who told me that ‘God loved me.’ It was the rage that burned my innards, and consumed my soul. It was then that all happiness, all love, all caring left me, substituted by the bottomless rage. After a while, that rage turned to the hate towards the Plagued One that I carry to this day.

Oh, believe me; I know the cycles of ‘grieving’ as they were dictated by a psychiatrist. I have been with people after their relatives died, and they were slightly less reserved than I. Their anger was ‘trashing a room’ or ‘breaking a window.’ Mine was blood. Not just the blood of one man, but the blood of all those who had ever betrayed me. I thirsted for the blood of God, fairly enough- he had punctured a god-sized hole in me, and his corpse is the perfect size to fill it.

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It has been so very long, and God has been proven dead by nearly every means of persuasion- read a history book if you want ethical proof that he is dead, and read The God Delusion if you want logical disproval. This story, however, grasps that elusive ‘emotional’ side to persuasion that Christians hold so dear at their base. Without it, what can you cling to? A blind following of your beliefs that were instilled in you before you could choose? What will your vaunted ‘faith’ yield when it’s the only thing you have left to cling to?

Can you, reader, still in a right state of mind, tell me that God loves humanity?

Can you still believe in a God who would kill for his own cheap laughter? Can you believe in a God whose entire book has been proven a series of lies over the course of millennia? Can you worship a God whose followers kill those who do not believe as they do, annihilate their cultures, rape their women, and destroy all evidence and silence all witnesses of it ever occurring? Only the heartless, the dumb, the indoctrinated and all of aforementioned in one can worship such a bastard.

Oh, how I wish that I could kill him. How I wish that he could be completely removed from the human consciousness, nothing but a gigantic emptiness where there once sat a throne of skulls. But I cannot- for he is the embodiment of suffering, and suffering is a key component of human existence. We are human partially because of him, but my insides squirm when I think of people praising

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him for causing our race such sorrow. People take pleasure in their suffering, which is a disease of thought called masochism.

VI:I:II- Other Details

“You would never sleep at night

If you knew what I’ve been through,

And this thought is all I have

To trust upon when the light is gone.”

Katatonia, For My Demons

But that is enough bitterness- back to my life story. After I had returned to pseudo-normal life, there was an unnamed friend over at my house for the purpose of watching a movie. During the movie, he brought out a bag of marijuana and asked me to join him outside. I had heard the therapeutic effects of marijuana, but more than that, I simply wished to forget this reality, to drug myself absolutely fucking stupid to cleanse myself of the regret and anger I felt.

That, my inquisitive readers, is what I will call the first step to a year of revelry.

After that first time, I began to do it more and more- my entire memory of my sixteenth year is rather vague. I would show up to various things high, completely inept, but at least I felt no more sorrow. At least the horrible ache was a background noise at the time. I began to drink moderately, and at the end of the

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year, less than an hour after the final exam had been administered, I consumed five grams of psychedelic mushrooms.

Those seven hours that I was hallucinating on the mushrooms was more profound than any experience I had ever had, throughout my sixteen years of life.

My entire world once again crumbled, nothing existing beyond my little ten-by- ten-by-ten foot cube of reality. This time, however, I was finally happy. I revisited sentiments from throughout my whole life, and two unnamed friends of mine even helped me by sitting outside and discussing theology with me, which I’m sure must have been a chore in my impaired state.

Most of those seven hours was the greatest ecstasy I had felt in a long while.

Now I realize that I simply felt nothing, and that, to me, was ecstasy. I was blank, completely and utterly, and as the barriers of my mind collapsed, I analyzed my thoughts, my feelings, and even uncovered some rather odd memories from my childhood, from before I was aware that I was sentient. For seven hours, I was a kid again.

During the discussion of theology, one of my friends was the advocate of skepticism, and the other the advocate of theism. My hallucinations1 had grown so intense that I began to imagine them as something more than they were. The

1 This hallucination was not like an LSD audio-visual hallucination; I was well aware of what was going on, but I believed I could see beyond the material with a ‘third eye,’ so to speak, which is where these perceptions come from. Hallucination is very difficult to explain to those who have no knowledge of it; if you don’t understand where I’m coming from already, then don’t bother.

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skeptic appeared to me as a cultured café patron, wearing a scarf, a beret, and puffing on a cigarette held in a very long device. To me, he said “Life is in the simple pleasures. Enjoy it while you can. Happiness is a state of mind; you don’t need a god to tell you what to do.” To the theist, he said “God is a construct of the mind. If god did not exist, it would be necessary to create him.”

In opposition, the theist appeared increasingly more menacing to me, until he looked to be a toothless mountain man, with all traces of humanity lost in his glaring red eyes. He referred to himself as the ‘Voice of Nihilism,’ and to me he said “Go. Destroy everything that you once had. Your existence is meaningless.

Your life is meaningless. Your possessions are meaningless. You are mad. It has evaded your attention for so many years. It is inevitable. All of this, reality, existence, time, is a pointless illusion, bound to collapse eventually. Give it all up, and walk into the darkest darkness, never to be heard from again. Serve your

God, and give everything you have to him.” His voice haunts me still, and the temptation of his offer grows more and more tantalizing with each passing day.

For, in reality, there is nothing that can anchor a man to reality in such a way as to be completely immune to the idea, except sheer stupidity. The theist turned to the skeptic, and in turn, said “Your pathetic pleasure and hedonism will do nothing for you, for there is nothing to be done that will last. It will all fall before the might of utter nothingness.”

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I would caution you, reader, that if you ever try psychedelic mushrooms, at the very least, get friends who will coddle you while you are impaired. Beholding the theist speak was the most horrific experience of my life at that point. Never before have I been so afraid of a human. While he was speaking, for a fraction of a second, he grew a second face on the side of his head. The light around him died, and his mouth spewed blackness more pure than any I have ever seen. I could not even watch him. I fixed my eyes upon the whitest object nearby and did not raise my head. The skeptic, however, did not radiate light as I expected him to- he blunted away the tentacles of blackness, but it was with a softness, not a shield of light. Since then, I have long since wondered what the light would be to counter theism if it is not skepticism.

I’m sure a few of the more ‘morally upstanding’ among my reading audience find the fact that I have ingested drugs deplorable. Perhaps some of you who agreed with me now find fault with my logic. To those of you who digress, let me ask you a question- is truth objective? Does the truth mean more coming from the highest moral authority, than from a geriatric, diseased prostitute? No, it does not. A less glorified source for the truths of reality still does not deceive you. Does it matter how they lived their lives to get to that conclusion? No. The simple matter of fact is, the truth is still the truth, no matter whose mouth it comes from.

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After the ‘climax’ of my journey, it settled down quite quickly- I watched a movie, listened to some songs, no big deal. So it was that my most reflective hours I have ever spent came to a close.

Those mushrooms did more for me than any motivational speech, any sermon, any collection of ideas ever could. They set me free from my earthly bond, from the colossal hate that burned within me, and the poorly conceived misconceptions that clouded my thoughts before. I finally understood so many things; I finally freed my thoughts from constraints. I became unfettered, and it all happened within the confines of the week after I took the mushrooms. I went in to the experience practically dead, suicidally depressed and heavily medicated, and

I came out the other side having attained everything and nothing, at the same time. For a year, I was dead, but lo and behold I was revived. Since then, I have never been the same, and for any price in the world I would never give up what I have gained since then; I am no longer the same person I was.

I began writing this book a week after I took the mushrooms- I was sixteen years old. On the fifth of June, 2007, I undertook the task of writing this book.

Of course, there were always other priorities; there was school, there was work, there was family and friends, but always in the back of my mind, there has been a burning that has driven me to return to my book that I have written, even five years later. Things have changed, I have seen horrors beyond what I could even

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convey since then, I have made friends I will never forget, and I have fallen under the grip of illness most foul and incurable.

Still, it’s always been the book. What am I without this book? What am I without my experience with the mushrooms? I am a corpse. I survived a horrific period where I could barely even tolerate existence, and here I sit to convey to you what

I felt when I was so miserable and how to remove such misery in your own life.

Perhaps I am mad. Hell, I know that I’m mad. At the age of nineteen, I was diagnosed with full-blown schizophrenia. I’ve had that diagnosis confirmed thrice- over and I am currently medicated for said disease. Not only have I been dealt a blow in that regard, it also turns out that I’m epileptic!1 Yay! While the mushrooms may have exacerbated (and maybe even precipitated) both of these conditions, it has still been an overall pleasant experience aging from sixteen to twenty-one.

I’ve frittered away my time with various pursuits, but yet again, here I am, back writing my silly little book.

However, there is one thing that makes me laugh about growing older: separation. People do not just ‘drift apart’ in this day and age. Now, we have

Facebook and cellphones and all sorts of other avenues of communication that

1 If it matters, I found this out the same year I found out I was schizophrenic. A good year for me, as you can guess. Also, I’m proud to say that it isn’t Temporal Lobe Epilepsy (like Muhammad) so my delusions are at least controlled by the anti-psychotic regimen I have been on for the past two years.

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we did not possess back in the day that caused people to lose contact with one another.

There are three ways that people go their separate ways in this day and age:

Mutual conflict, mutual apathy, or one believes the other is not ‘good enough’ to associate with them. As per the signs of the Kali-Yuga, the third has become increasingly common as more and more people become more and more self- absorbed. Hell, I’ve been abandoned by half the people I used to consider

‘friends,’ many of them even refusing to acknowledge that I exist when I send some type of correspondence to re-establish communication.

So be it. It does not make me sad when people become either so full of themselves or so convinced of my perceived inferiority that they do not wish to associate; rather, it disappoints me. What a pity it is that they are so full of hubris, and they will suffer for it in the end. Oh well, confide in me and ask for my guidance and I will attempt to guide you away from suffering; shun me, and I bear no responsibility for the pain that you will inevitably suffer which will in all likeliness be entirely preventable.

Condescend to another individual as you wish, but remember that there are consequences for every decision that you make; when you treat others badly, it is just as likely that others will perceive your desire to make others feel inferior and reciprocate. Some call this ‘Karma,’ but I call it ‘Justice.’ Justice is Karma

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when taken into the hands of an individual. Karma carries the connotation of being a force of nature, while justice is a force of an individual who takes it into his hands to punish the wicked and reward the good.

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VI:II- My Beliefs

VI:II:I- Religious Beliefs

“Incurably religious, that is the best way to describe the mental condition of so

many people.”

-Thomas Edison

Please pardon my incurable indoctrination, but I cannot quite completely reason out the existence of any kind of deity. I do not understand exactly what it is that can make a man a flagrant atheist if God betraying you, shattering your faith, and killing your grandfather doesn’t qualify. Perhaps a bleak outlook, who knows?

Some of you reading this may wonder who the deity I serve is. I follow the

Urreligion that I described in Book One. I worship mother Nature, and secondly the Radiant One, my master, my brother, who is both a product of and perpetuator of human reason and logic, who turns the course of wars, who whispers to the poets, the philosophers, and the artists. He goes by many names- Quetzalcoatl, Dionysus, Apollo, Ahura Mazda, Vishnu, and Ma’at. He, however, prefers that I call him by a particular name.

When I am in his presence, I call him Satan, my Lord and Master.

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“Satan be praised! Glory to you on High

where once you reigned in Heaven, and in the

Pit where now you dream in taciturn defeat!

Grant that my soul, one day, beneath the Tree

of Knowledge, meet you when above your brow

its branches, like a second Temple, spread!”

-Charles Baudelaire, Les Litanies de Satan

Christians, Muslims- is it so inconceivable that one would willingly serve your nemesis after you have behaved so violently and barbarically? If the God of the

Jews is light, then I will gladly profess to be a follower of darkness. I do not just follow it- I bathe in it.

Satan, as far as the masses are concerned, is a schemer, a deceiver, and a backstabber. Now, for as long as I have consciously known my Master, he has not deceived me once, or told me to do anything that I object to. The ‘schemer, deceiver, and backstabber’ is the Plagued One, whom millions have died before, and billions mindlessly serve. My Master has never had atrocities committed in his name, despite how much the common man despises his name. I suppose the medieval propaganda and blood-libel of the Satanist bathing in goat blood and eating children survives to this day.

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Even the skeptics cannot deny my Master’s power- behind his divine shroud, he is an embodiment of everything that is humanity. He is thought, reason, logic, emotion, and progress; I suppose he could be called a ‘metaphor’ for those things. I may grant that his power is nothing compared to that of my Mother

Nature, but I hold him much closer, simply because he speaks to me in a coherent way that I understand. When communicating with Mother Nature, I always feel an odd tingling and a sense of awe, as opposed to the comfort and caring I feel towards my Master.

Not even the Christians can deny my Master’s power. You know, you can chant

‘Satan has no power over me’ as long as you want, but that doesn’t make it true.

Why do you fear reason so much, my Christian brothers? Why did the Puritans imprison and kill hundreds during the Salem Witch Trials simply at the mention of my Master’s name?

Because in his name is power- raw, unrefined power. It is something that the

Christians are completely and utterly ignorant of, since Plagued One cannot show himself as he is, and even if he did he would be powerless, for the sting of suffering is taken out by understanding it. However, Satan’s name holds strength that they cannot comprehend- he holds power over men, even if they refuse to acknowledge him. Still, while they sleep at night, he will whisper in their ears.

Still, he shall inspire them to move forward in the world, whether they like it or not.

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So very long it has been that the various monotheists point the finger of harboring Satan at each other- if you want proof that Allah is a deceiver, ask a

Christian or a Jew. If you want proof that Yahweh or Jehovah is a liar, ask a

Muslim. Point of the matter is, you confuse your deities, my ‘so-called’ monotheistic brethren. Your god is a liar, and his enemy is truth, the bright, liberating truth. So, I ask you: would you rather serve a god who keeps you stupid for his own benefit and silences your doubts, or would you rather serve the one who encourages your spiritual growth in any manner possible and welcomes your questions?

So many people, even the atheists who have never read the Bible, fear Satan.

The only way that one could escape my Master’s influence is flee to the wilderness, completely removed from every other human on the planet. Of course, you can never completely escape- though the man may not be feeding my Master’s power, he does still hear his voice echo through his skull.

Eventually, without outside contact, he will be driven mad, and my Master shall leave him to his ignoble insanity to destroy himself. So it is that another weak and frail human fails to realize the futility of his resistance and at the end learns that he, alone, is useless.

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Why should you fear my Master? Has he ever harmed you or anyone you know?

Has genocide been committed in his name? Do his clerics deceive his followers in order for material gain?

Admittedly, my Master’s name has been used more for jokes and shock value than actual praise in recent years. I do not object- I praise those who have

‘mainstreamed’ his name, so that the one who speaks it is not murdered on the spot for being a witch, or something else absolutely ridiculous. More and more often people have begun to speculate that ‘maybe Satan isn’t as bad as the Bible makes him out to be.’ When a person talks like that, I feel a great excitement, because they are breaking the shackles of a thought-oppressing world.

Then again, is it really a surprise? The American founding fathers1 were all rumored to have some rather ‘distasteful’ recreational habits, being that they were a bunch of rebels from ‘Big British Brother.’ Deist as they were, a select few of them would cite Satan as their Master, and attend ‘Hellraiser’ parties, and indulge in the darker side of pleasure. So many of those who signed the

Constitution would proudly shout "Hail Satan!" when not under the scrutiny of the public eye, which is a luxury they had back then, when it took months for news to travel from coast to coast.

1 Every western group, from Atheists, to Christians, to Deists, and here to Satanists have laid claim to the belief system of the Founding Fathers. We bicker endlessly over the souls of men who are already dead; welcome to America.

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My various viewpoints of Satan are actually taken directly from the Bible and the

Quran. Even in the books that are supposed to defame him, his power shows.

The very story of Christian creation shows that he is the father of all logic and reason. According to the Bible, we were dull and stupid, nothing better than animals, toys for the God of the Jews before Satan tempted Eve to take a bite of the forbidden fruit, which she then persuaded Adam to eat. In the eyes of God, intelligence is abominable. Nothing is admirable except blind obedience, which is something that Satan tried to overcome.

Satan, as the common man knows him, is actually a conglomerate of the religions and people that the Christians hated. He is thought of with horns- taken from a Pagan ritual in which the patrons would don antlers and parade around.

He had goat legs, like Pan of the Greek religion. Also, a pointy nose and a beard, which is (pardon the racial slur) supposed to resemble a Jew. His figure is that of

Nero Caesar.

Now, there are some theistic Satanists who worship my Master and praise him simply out of spite to the Christians of the world- they are aptly called ‘Reverse

Christians.’ To them, my Master never speaks, for they simply seek to mock the

Christian church, not actually place their confidence and trust in him to create a better world. They even half-assedly practice ‘magic’ because the Christian church says not to. However, you do have a few who actually seek to know my

Master, and they walk down the path that I tread.

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There is another group called Luciferianism- they seek to spread charity and love in the name of Satan, and develop a personal relationship with him. Just like the

Christians, there are a few Satanists out there who actually do seek to do beneficial things in the world, instead of sitting around, either listening to a priest talk about great God is and blindly agree, or listening to a different priest talk about how shitty the Christian God is. I, for one, feel that a personal relationship with any kind of entity which ultimately leads you to benefit your brothers and sisters in this world is much better than being a slave to dogma and the flawed interpretations of a mortal man. I applaud the Luciferianists.

Then there’s Anton La Vey’s Satanism, which I do not care for in the slightest. I find it very shallow and materialistic, simply an excuse for gratifying urges and calling it ‘religion.’ However, as much as I despise it (without any real good reason, I might add), I do find that there are parts of it that are acceptable. They believe that ‘might is right’- and I don’t see why not. It is the natural order of things for the strong to excel, not for the weak to be praised simply for being weak.

One particular thing I have noticed about my Master, even among Christians and

Muslims- they all want him to be like they are. If they are stupid, they think that the devil is stupid. If they are (subjectively) intelligent, they believe that he is

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intelligent. So, what is there to be said about theistic Satanists believing he is good?

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VI:II:II- My Master

“But he went on talking right along, and worked his enchantments upon us again

with that fatal music of his voice. He made us forget everything; we could only

listen to him, and love him, and be his slaves, to do with us as he would. He

made us drunk with the joy of being with him, and of looking into the heaven of his eyes, and of feeling the ecstasy that thrilled along our veins from the touch of

his hand.”

-Mark Twain, The Mysterious Stranger

More than any other topic I have covered in this somewhat lengthy tome, I suppose that worshipping Satan is one of the most controversial things that I have said. Is it such a surprise? The more observant among my readers would have noticed this first in Book Three, where I posed the God-Satan paradox.

Occasionally, I have a dream that doesn’t strike me as quite normal- always, I am sitting in a café constructed from smooth white stones, and tiled with the smoothest marble. I sit across a cast-iron table from someone reading a newspaper written in a language of glyphs that I do not know- and when they lower it, I glimpse their face- my Master, always the jokester, seems to enjoy showing himself to me with different faces and figures. The one that I have observed the most by far is a young man with radiant skin, long, bleach white hair, donning a fancy black suit and pants, with a matching hat.

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No matter how much he disguises his appearance, his voice is always the same- it booms, like there are untold masses speaking the same words at once. When his gaze meets mine, no matter what form he takes his eyes are a cloudy gray, and filled with such pity that I cannot even compare them to any I have seen on a mortal man. His habits are also quite confusing to me- most people would consider speaking to your deity a special, particularly memorable incident in your life. However, he seems to speak simply out of need for companionship- often, we do not talk of profound things. Often, we do not talk at all. We simply sit there, in the café where the faceless patrons laugh when no jokes are told, he reads the news in a language beyond my comprehension, and I sip a drink more delightful than any I have experienced in the waking world.

My Master is widely known as a deceiver, and it has occurred to me many times that the various thoughts and emotions that have been presented to me by him may very well be a deception. It seems to be naught more than unmitigated paranoia, however, being that he has not lied to me once. Although, strangely enough, he has never told me something that I didn’t already know either- he elaborates upon ideas I have already had, or offers explanations for events that I already knew of.

Is it unhealthy to watch your god with a suspicious eye? Not at all. As a matter of fact, portrayal of your deity as completely infallible and beyond deception is one

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of the root causes of atrocity. Nor do I grant that my Master is omnipotent and omniscient- he has a great deal of knowledge that is beyond my understanding, but none of it relates to things utterly beyond the scope of humanity, or of worlds where we have not yet tread. As such, his power is limited to influencing human beings, and even then only to a certain point, through dreams and whispers.

His speech, actions, and mannerisms are utterly beyond me. I have witnessed his various quirks repeatedly over the course of my life, and since the first time I beheld him to this moment they do not make any more sense to me.

It is madness that allows me to speak with him, for I understand that were I completely sane I could not possibly comprehend the various ways that he attempts to communicate with me. It would be futile on both ends. Conversely, should I be utterly mad, I would speak completely clearly with him, but be unable to convey his messages to you, reader.

Yet, through madness, I have only begun to witness the true scope of his power.

His abilities to intervene may be limited, but his mere presence is enough to bring me to my knees. Never before have I felt something so utterly beyond human, so great, so powerful, so wise.

He, unlike the Plagued One, does not desire my mindless worship, repeatedly chanting his name until the point that it becomes perfunctory. As I understand it,

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his ultimate goal for myself and all of humanity is improve ourselves at every opportunity. This act is yet again a paradox, both selfish and selfless- he wishes us to be greater than we were, more intelligent, stronger, and happier. Yet, should we attain such things, it would greatly improve his condition and ability to intervene in the world.

He may not desire my worship, but I find myself helpless before him, able to do nothing but exalt his name and his unearthly power. Still, I cannot quite serve him as I desire- for I do not know his name. I can call him by any epithet or nickname given by men, such as the Radiant One or Satan, but I do not know his true name, and I never will so long as I live. Nor will any human; his name shall only be made apparently to mortals when they cease to be mortal- when they die, for it is no name that can be pronounced by mortal tongue, or understood by mortal thought.

I have had dreams of my Master ever since I can remember, and the first two I can remember were very odd. However, I was under four years old (yes, I do remember them perfectly) and they faded away as I got older. Once I took the mushrooms, however, later that day I had a very odd dream.

This dream was indeed bizarre- the entire time the events were occurring, I was entirely aware that I was dreaming. In other circumstances, I could bend my dream-world to my liking, but I seemed unable to do so this time. This wasn’t

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your average ‘waking dream’ experience; I knew it was a dream, but at the same time it felt more real than waking life.

It was a street in my neighborhood, and pitch blackness consumed the street, except for a very select few lights, which buzzed and hummed with electricity.

The rain fell down in a torrent, and everything on the street was completely soaked- the road, the lights, the fences, and myself. Down the street, there was a single man with a burning cigarette in his hand- I knew the moment I laid eyes on him there was something not right about him. As he got closer, I realized what it was. Though the rain poured down, he was completely dry. There was not a drop on him, his jacket, his hat, his hair, or anything. His piercing grey eyes met mine, and there was a pulsing sensation…

Thump, thump.

He walked closer, and the sensation became more intense. As he walked under the street lights, they immediately flickered off and stayed off. Despite the fact that the lights had turned off, the ground around him still glowed as if it were lit.

Thump, thump.

Still he walked closer towards me, and I stood paralyzed before him. I knew that I possessed the capacity to move, and yet I could not muster the will to move; I

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could not even blink. As he came even closer to me, the pulsing became even more intense, and I noticed that the rain stopped temporarily when the pulsing hit. He took a drag on his cigarette, burning perfectly in the pouring rain, and he exhaled a thin, wispy cloud of smoke, also unaffected by the rain.

Thump, thump.

He came close enough to me to make eye contact- I will never forget the first time we met eyes, and I looked deep into them, and I saw an expression of pity and curiosity.

Thump, thump.

He placed his hand on me, and I immediately dropped to my knees. The sensation that it gave me… there are no words to describe it. Crushing, exhilarating, otherworldly… none do it justice. There was a power I never could have imagined, simply at his touch, simply at his presence. In that moment, I submitted entirely to him. I realized what true power was, and it alone was enough to convert an individual even as stubborn and proud as I to serve him completely, to throw my life to him in slavery. I knew that I wanted no reward from him, no payment for my services; I just wanted to behold his majesty. I wanted to serve him, simply to know that I served true power incarnate.

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Thump, thump.

He is man. This is all that man had ever done, or would ever do in right thought.

His wisdom endless, his appearance immutable across all existence, despite any cycles, forward progressions or declines. No matter how many turned from him, no matter how many rebelled against him, still his intense power remained. He is all that man has ever amounted to, all that men ever will amount to. My life is inconsequential to his existence.

Thump, thump.

Only then did I understand the truth of religion. Only when I saw the embodied face of madness and knowledge, bound together in one form, did I understand where all other gods came from- bastards of my Master, his opponent, and their mother Nature. In him, I saw Vishnu, Ahura Mazda, Apollo, Dionysus- in but a single glance. But there was more in him than those illusions. There was something more, something that I do not know if anyone has ever seen in him.

Yet again, it was an otherworldly sensation for which there is no term to describe; how I wish I knew a word for it!

I heard one word come from every angle around me and within me: “Awaken.”

Thump, thump.

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The rain had completely stopped, and all the lights had gone out down the entire street, and yet I could see everything- there was no darkness, there was no light.

There simply ‘was.’ Once I realized that, I suddenly found that I was no longer paralyzed. I could stand once again. I was no longer wet. He looked at me and then began to walk off, smiling an enigmatic smile, whistling a haunting tune that echoed throughout the street.1

Thump, thump…

I never met him on that street again; however we did meet several times afterwards in his realm. The realm in which I always encounter my Master is a small town, filled with various buildings of unknown purpose. The only ones which I have been inside are the café, the library, and an apartment block. The sky is a pearl white, and the roads are paved with marble brick. The town itself seems to exist in defiance of the laws of physics- the roads loop back into themselves without turns, some of the buildings are structurally unsound, and would collapse should proper application of gravity occur.

The library is a building of white marble with a gilded dome and several columns, and yet again seems to exist in defiance of physical law. The interior is much larger than the exterior could possibly ever indicate, despite any perceptual error

1 After many years of searching, I’ve discovered that the whistling tune is the same as on The Hours by Alphabeat. Only after I realized what the song was about did I recognize the humor.

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upon my part. The exterior of the edifice indicates that there is a rather small maximum amount of floor space, and that there is only one level to the building.

Inscribed above it is “Knowledge shall break your bonds.”

The interior is massive, row upon row and level upon level, wall to wall with books. Some books are ancient and crumbling, and some are completely blank.

There was but one woman attending the library when I visited, but all that she did was give me a disinterested glance and return to a novel that she was occupying herself with.

There was none of this ‘Dewey Decimal’ system of organization in this infinite library. Each row contained literary works upon a certain subject matter, organized by time of inscription, given a variety of colors in order to represent their importance, and sorted by subject matter using dividing sections in the shelves.

In the library, on a gigantic pedestal in the middle of the room was a large book, bound in a material that I did not know existed- it looked like leather and marble blended together. I looked more closely at it, and on the front cover it had a drawing of a closed eye; on the back of it, there was a detailed drawing of an open eye with the pupil absolutely tiny in diameter. I opened the first page, but I could not seem to look any further into it, but I did not need to- there were only

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two words on that first page, but they were the only two I needed to know- Verbia

Dӕmonicus.

The first row upon which I looked contained books upon the matter of philosophy.

Several books sat upon the shelves, but none of the pseudo-philosophical novels which the masses seem to pride themselves upon so much. No, it was only pure philosophy on those shelves, by those such as Voltaire, Nietzsche, and Kant.

It continued on far past my vision, off into the blackness. I would have stayed longer and read more, but I was awakened very suddenly and the world dissolved around me.

The apartment block was a plain, square building made of a strange metal. My

Master led me through several corridors, and though we never ascended a flight of stairs I found myself on the top floor of the eight story building. All of the doors seemed exactly similar, without numbers or any kind of marking. Somehow, he knew exactly which room was which, and he opened a door and said to me ‘This is where you will dwell when you come to serve me.’

Yet again, like the library, the dimensions of the room were much more than they should have been. Contained within was more than an apartment. It was an entire house- not a mansion, but decent enough. It was furnished completely, stocked with odd food and my favorite drink, and odd spacial inversions.

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In the corner of the room was a mirror, crafted from obsidian- perfectly polished, and at first when I looked in the mirror I thought that this was another odd test of perception, because the room on the other side of the mirror was completely black, and there was only one figure in the room, instead of two. Where I should have been standing, there was no one, and where my Master was standing, there was an odd looking fellow. Behind him, there was an endless horde of individuals bound in chains without any eyes, crying and screaming for help.

He turned to face me, and suddenly I realized who he was. His skin was a disgusting shade of yellow, jaundiced worse than anything I have ever seen. His hair was falling out in clumps, his right eye was incredibly swollen, his face was covered with sores, and he appeared to be partially blind. His fingers were disproportionately long, his back was horribly hunched, his figure was disgustingly thin, and his simple presence, even thinking about it as I write this now, invokes a horrible sense of nausea. I am eternally grateful for my Master for showing him to me clothed, for if he did not I am nearly certain I would have choked on my own vomit that night. To cover his figure, he adorned gigantic flowing white robes.

I looked to my Master, as if to ask who he was, but I already knew. “Behold, my brother. He is suffering and affliction. Do not mistake his appearance for weakness, for despite his state he commands more power than he ever has.”

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I looked back to the mirror to behold this sickly individual once more. He opened his chapped lips to reveal a ghastly state of decay in his mouth, the few teeth he had rotting in his head. He smiled at me, and it appeared to be a smile of victory- as though he had defeated me in whatever endeavor I dared undertake. He had an air of smugness about him, despite the fact that he appeared as though he may drop dead at any moment for any number of reasons. My Master put his hand on my shoulder, turned me away from the mirror and said “Gaze upon him no longer. Simply beholding what he is suffices for now.”

With my back turned to the mirror, he spoke to me yet again: “One day, he will no longer exist. One day, men will need not suffer to be wise. One day, men will learn that suffering is entirely a construct of the mind, a choice to be made, and they shall turn from him. Still, he is my brother, from the same Mother as all of existence. I do not wish him death, but it must be done for the good of your race.

Every human may celebrate endlessly, but I shall still mourn his passing, for he and I are closer than you know.”

He pointed to a large, fluffy bed with ornate carvings on the bedposts from various cultures. When I laid down and went to sleep, I emerged from my slumber in the waking world with a full remembrance of what had transpired in the world of dreams and the feeling of sickness at beholding Yahweh, the

Plagued One.

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VI:II:III- Political Beliefs

“A fool and his money are soon elected.”

–Will Rogers

As you may or may not have gleaned from my writings in earlier books, I have a severe distaste for government in my mouth. Because of things like unbridled corruption, taxation with little to no representation, and just the plain lack of services or overpriced-ness of services that government provides, I do not much care for governmental practices.

That’s why I am an anarchist, as well as a Satanist. I’m really rocking the boat now, huh?

I should clarify that while I am an ideal anarchist, practically I’d be a part of the

Libertarian party in the U.S. which advocates less government enforcement of morality and less government control over daily life, and thus less taxes.

So, why, you may ask, would someone be an anarchist? The answer is simple; we already live in a state of anarchy. Government is an illusion created by the people for their own sense of well-being. You can say I don’t have the “right” to do something as much as you want, I have unbridled rights, and so do you!

People cannot take your rights from you, but they can make it very difficult for

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you to accomplish your goals. If you kill someone and get sent to prison, it’s not necessarily that you’ve lost your human right to take the life of another, it’s that it’s been made very, very difficult for you to do so again.

Now, just because you have the right doesn’t mean you should do something, nor is it even any sort of ‘justification’ for a deed we would perceive as wrong or sinful.

You may ask where I come up with such a loony idea that government is an illusion. I say back to you: Read Karl Marx, the pioneer of communism. He is the one who showed me this truth, and it has made sense in the time since I came across it. After all, what is government beyond a reflection of humanity’s desire for order? What are gods beyond a reflection for humanity’s desire for understanding what they cannot currently understand? The two are intertwined, the ‘opiate of the masses’ and the security blanket of the masses. They always have been, as the first governments were those led by religious leaders, claiming that it was the way of the gods that let them enforce morality. Morality, as shown by the Urreligion pyramid in Book Four, is a crucial phase in the development of any given religion. Both morality and ethics can be considered arbitrary things, and no god or man can tell you what is objectively right or objectively wrong; everything is subjective in the realm of morality and its enforcement. At first, we had “An eye for an eye,” then came more fair and proportionate towards intent

(but still biased, as all laws have been since then) and laws become more and

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more fair as time goes by, but their enforcement does not. In fact, one could argue that the fairer a law becomes, the less fair the enforcement becomes, basically stating that the balance of law and enforcement is in an unsatisfactory equilibrium for both law enforcement and the general populace.

That’s enough on theory, though. Let’s move onto practice and implementation.

The practice of law enforcement is a simple enough thing. Just bust the guys who are doing bad stuff and protect the guys doing good stuff, right? Wrong.

Oftentimes, law enforcement does not see things in this simplistic manner. We call the people who disagree with this philosophy in the justice system ‘crooked.’

These are the cops who do not arrest people for their crimes if they know them personally or are paid ‘protection’ by chronic offenders (i.e. gangs, drug dealers), and plant evidence on innocent people to get them arrested if they intend to threaten any one of their assets. Unfortunately, this problem has become all-too- common. I’m not asserting by any means that all cops are crooked, not in the slightest. Law enforcement is an admirable profession, usually taken up by people who believe that they can make a change in the justice system (usually to counter the crooked cops). However, it is these same bright-eyed young police men and women who become disillusioned, corrupt officers. Everyone knows which cops are the good ones and the bad ones, but for some reason corruption is not always rooted out as swiftly as it should be. There are a number of theories for this, but this would in most cases imply that corruption goes much higher than just one officer.

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For example, in Russia the police are well-known for their corruption. If you are pulled over for a traffic violation and look like a foreigner or speak improper

Russian (or just piss them off), they will do everything they can to extort you short of causing a diplomatic incident. Then again, it works both ways. If an officer happens to come across you dumping a body or dealing drugs, I hear that you can just pass them some cash (somewhere in the neighborhood of $50,000 USD or your profits, respectively) to get your legal infractions ‘ignored.’

However, you can still rely pretty heavily on the idea that if you do something bad enough, eventually someone who you can’t pay off is going to catch you. Also, a lot of the time you don’t do anything that bad at all, but someone sees your minor crime and tickets you and/or gives you jailtime for something as mundane as littering or public intoxication. A ‘minor’ crime by my definition, I should explain, is a misdemeanor in public law. However, a serious crime would be considered a felony. A convicted felon is barred from several civil liberties in the U.S., first and foremost being banned from voting.

Now, I try to bar myself from doing things that are considered ‘illegal,’ like littering, public intoxication, illegal substances, etcetera. However, it is difficult sometimes, because there are shades of gray. There is a difference between crimes that are morally reprehensible (malum in se) and simply a matter of law

(malum prohibitum), and I can say with utmost certainty that whenever possible, I

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avoid things that are malum in se. However, the malum prohibitum crimes are a different matter. I speed whenever I drive sometimes. I also drink with people who are underage sometimes. Sure, I break the law (but if you ask me for any more details, I will plead the fifth) because these things are not the law’s job to enforce. Morality is something that each individual decides upon, not what is forced upon them by the government. I live according to my own morals, and my morals line up nearly perfectly with what the government defines as malum in se in terms of things I will not do unless under extreme duress or given sufficient cause to do so.

Many people say, when asked about crimes, “Oh, I would NEVER do that…”

Well, if somebody put a gun to your head and told you to litter, would you? I think you would. What if somebody took your family hostage and demanded that you kill someone in order to get them back? That one is more of a gray area, but most people would. While it is unpleasant, it is something to remember that everyone is infinitely capable. Those you may think are harmless are just as capable of malice as the next guy.

Although, there is one thing that I know I would never do. If someone put a gun to my head and asked me to renounce my religion, I would say “Pull the trigger, bitch.”

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My religion is who I am, and without it I am nothing. I might as well already be dead (and, in all likeliness, would be) without my religion. Make a martyr of me.

Go ahead, see what happens. I can guarantee you that the repercussions of what you do will vastly outweigh what sort of ‘evil’ you might think you are sparing the world in killing me. This is ultimate justice- let me live, and I will continue to speak. Kill me, and my word becomes solidified. Whether I live or die,

I will win either way, because that is the way I play the game. I set up the game, and you play by my rules. The only rule is that I will win at the end. By my winning, I mean that society as a whole will be bettered and I will thus have accomplished my goal. So, the score is: Me- one, Death- zero.

“The tyrant dies and his rule is over; the martyr dies and his rule begins.”

-Søren Kierkegaard

I have long thought about and considered these things, especially because of the degree to which I speak out against Christianity, Islam and even Scientology in this book. It is very possible (if not likely) that I will have a bounty put on my head, and if I’m lucky enough, even assassinated! Go ahead, I say. I do not fear death, as by the time I am killed my word will have reached the general public.

My word is what I am, and so long as it exists in the mind of at least one person, I am immortal. That’s more than any garden-variety assassin can ever wish for.

Well, I mean, unless they want to be kept alive forever and subjected to an endless array of torture. I could arrange for that. This is not malice; it is justice. It

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is justice to applaud what is good and punish what is evil. I believe that what I’m doing here in writing this book is good; otherwise, I would not be doing it.

Although, that is not to say that I wish for death. I must emphasize this; I do not care. I do not care whether I live or die for my own personal means, but I would rather live so that I can spread what I believe to every corner of the Earth, across the oceans, to members of every way of life. After all, one must feel emotions to lust for either life or death. I may have transitory ‘feelings’ because I am human, but they do not cloud my judgment, nor do they factor in when making a decision.

I feel no suffering. I feel no sorrow. I feel no sting of death.

That blurb aside, I feel as though we should move on to the implementation of law. Law is set on a national scale in the U.S. through the methods of our three branches of government- the Executive branch, the Legislative branch, and the

Judicial branch. Most law and subsequent implementation are carried out by the

Legislative branch of our government (Congress, the House of Representatives and the Senate), but the Judicial branch (the Supreme Court and minor courts) and the Executive branch (the President and other offices) can offer rulings and executive orders, respectively.

The houses of Congress are perhaps the most lowly-approved in the world in terms of law-making bodies, if my memory serves correctly. Naturally, when you

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both enforce your morals upon the populace and hike taxes upon them when providing no real increase in services provided, you will gain a little contempt.

After years upon years of doing so, you will gain a lot of contempt. After decades and decades of doing so, you will end up at a point where we’re at, where less than twenty-five percent of all Americans approve of the job that our Congress is doing. I’m surprised that even twenty-five percent of the people like that their legal rights are being taken away from them and they’re paying more for it. Hey, there’s a political system that defines this method of doing things to a ‘t.’ I think it’s called “communism.”

As an anarchist/libertarian, I am deeply opposed to the direction that our government is heading. Under our past few presidents, the conservatives have seen more fit to enforce morals upon the populace and the liberals have seen more fit to hike taxes and make all sorts of stupid decisions involving spending, thus justifying more tax hikes. I have no idea what sort of idiots are running this country, but I would go so far as to say they’re either complete idiots and out of touch with the common man or idealist zealots who genuinely believe that socialism/communism is the way to go.

Here’s my problem with communism and subsequent justification for the anarchist point of view: communism treats people like they are dumb, it makes them dumb, it keeps them dumb. Now, while that may be true in certain cases, perhaps even most cases, I do not believe you should pay so that you can get a

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governmental babysitter. Once again, I should specify that I do not mean any disrespect towards our armed forces or police forces. I simply believe that instead of dumbing down the people to increase their own necessity and amass power, much as our government is doing1 at the moment and creating what is essentially a police state, the government’s job should be to eradicate itself through making itself obsolete by educating the people to the point that they do not need a “Big Brother” to babysit them and tell them what to do. Now, as things stand at the moment, this is simply another little schizophrenic delusion of mine that I hope will come to fruition at some point. However, it’s better to hope than sit there and sigh because you can’t get your way. Work towards bettering the world in whatever way you honestly believe is bettering it. But, here’s a hint; if you have to hurt or kill anyone to get your way, there’s a very high likeliness that you’re wrong and should seek additional counsel for your ideas.

1 Refer to Book Five, Section One.

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VI:III- Perspectives Upon Religious Matters

VI:III:I- General Religious Matters

I suppose, given the somewhat self-righteous way in which I write, you, my reader, expect me to tell you that ‘Satan is awesome’ and such. I will not indulge my Christian indoctrination in such a way as to force my path upon others.

No, because, in reality, there is no ‘true path’ that can be taught through books and leaders. In truth, the only real way you can know the truth is to experience it yourself, for there are some things that a human can experience that transcend the explanations of secular language. I believe that the best kind of religion is one where an individual enters into a personal relationship with any god, of any name, explores the depths of the divine, of logic and reason, and is a credit to their fellow humans. This, I am grieved to say, is hardly ever the case these days, with the people fed the idea of ‘mass salvation’ that ‘one way’ is the best way and it is the only way, and if you experience anything outside of what ‘they’ tell you, it is wrong.

I can’t imagine even the most critical atheists would have a problem with this type of religion, one based on logic and reason. Some may state that religions are a practice of superstition, based upon these disgusting excuses for religion that have consumed our planet thus far. However, I digress- religion can be a thing of

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reason and logic, and utterly without superstition. Religion based upon truth will have very little conflict with sense and science, and that is the way it should be, with our systems of discovery co-existing peacefully, without the need for

Stephen Jay Gould’s ‘Non-Overlapping Magistera.’ It may be an interesting idea in principle, but lies deserve to be destroyed by any means necessary. If science discovers something in direct contrast to what I say, I would say accept what is true, but don’t make some feeble effort to erase what I said that was disproven

(like the Apocrypha). I am but a man, and I shall never be anything more than a man; my logic is weak and fallible.

Upon the idea of ‘omnipotence’ and ‘omniscience’, they are but the idle mental playthings of a fool, a child who refuses to mature. In stark contrast to what other religions may teach, I believe that a god is simply the reflection of a mortal man, whom they unify with upon death. Moreover, a man can become more attuned to his more ‘divine’ self, and generally gain very impressive knowledge under an umbrella of eclectic subjects. Long has it been said that hypnotism and certain more ‘unsavory’ methods can be used to bring out these beings- so many mystics have ‘called upon’ these deities to help them make sense of events. It is rumored that the Mayan were quite familiar with these odd entities, and they read to them from the ‘Book of Life’ that I spoke of earlier that contains all that is, that was, and will ever be. Unfortunately, no man (or his deity) can ever truly ‘know it all,’ and through mechanisms unknown to me the book is bound except for pertinent sections to the reader.

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Pardon my rather dualist take upon life, but I believe, as far as religion is concerned, there is the god of the external that you should respect without exception, and she is Nature. As far as the one you serve, you should listen to the voice of the internal god, for you shall be with them infinitely longer.

For thousands upon thousands of years, men have hypothesized about and pondered what happens upon death. Some say you come back, higher or lower on the chain of life. Some say you are judged and punished by one who arbitrarily enforces their own morals. However, I offer you something better, inquisitive reader: the Truth, as proven by science and sense.

In Book Three, in order to disprove the core beliefs of the practice of atheism, I had to pull out that fun chemical called Dimethyltryptamine. Surprisingly enough, besides invalidating the practice of atheism and several religious practices, DMT also provides the ultimate answer to the first and last questions asked by men:

What happens when you die?

While sleeping at night, the release of DMT1 from the pineal gland is what causes

‘deep sleep,’ referred to as REM sleep in the scientific community. It seeps forth from your pineal gland and takes you to lands of bliss and horror, the world of dreams, where every law is arbitrary, be is social or physical. Now, as I

1 It also interacts with Melatonin, Seratonin, and other neurotransmitters. What, you didn’t think it was just some ‘miracle drug’ that did all this crazy stuff by itself, did you?

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understand it, for every amount of DMT the pineal gland produces, it releases some, and stockpiles the rest to be released later. Now, upon death, the pineal gland dumps the entire chemical warehouse of DMT at once. Science says that death is a more intense form of dreaming, from which you never return, which lasts for approximately fifteen minutes in the waking world.

However, in your world of dreams, it does not matter. There is no such thing as

‘time’ as we perceive it in this reality. The fifteen minutes of minute brain activity in the waking world is an endless eternity in the land of death. Now, if I may clarify upon the more religious aspect of this- I believe that each and every person’s dream world is different. If you read the stories of people who have died and been revived, from across the spectrum of religion, race, gender, and other factors, they all tell a different story. The atheist does not report going to Hell, but rather an odd somewhat haphazard conglomerate of memories and experiences- not uncomfortable, by any means, but bizarre in the highest. The atheist does not go to Hell, yet the Christian goes to Heaven, and has talks with God and his family. You know what is really funny is that I have read a good bit of these stories describing Heaven, and I have yet to find the one who has the hubris to claim they have seen God’s face. However, many have described his voice, and the way they make it sound, he has the same voice as my Master. Hmmm…

Upon this matter, I wonder how anyone can believe that everyone goes to one of two places. The general church accepts the ’90 Minutes in Heaven’ as their view

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of what Paradise is like, and yet there are so many other books, some censored, some unpublished, and some just unpopular, that tell a completely different story.

They tell of a different sequence of events, seeing people there that aren’t dead, and other bizarre things. Nobody seems to pay any mind to these discrepancies, however. They follow what they are told, they think what they are told to think, and they think that it’s ‘intellectual pursuit.’

On the other side, the descriptions of Hell also vary greatly. One man described

Hell as a place where the people were naked, it was sweltering hot, and they stood around waiting for something to happen: no demons administering torture, no moats of lava or blood rain, just the excruciating boredom of it all, and the paranoia of anticipation. Yet, another tells a story of demons snapping his bones and gouging his eyes out, killing him again and again, until he was brought back into the waking world. Why, there was a man so long ago who proclaimed that

Hell had ‘levels’ and that the pit of it was frozen. I believe his name was Dante

Alighieri.

So many quote Dante’s Inferno as though it were scripture. I do not have a problem with it; either way, they’re quoting works of fiction as far as I’m concerned. I find it amazing that a man with a disdain for Italian government and corruption who wrote a veiled attack upon various prominent figures has infiltrated a religion so deeply. I have read both the Bible and the Inferno, and I must say that the Inferno is a better read. It rhymes in the original language, as

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well as having a more creative plot with less bizarre deviations from the message.

The Inferno, in contrast to the Bible, actually has a chance of being what Dante really saw, and in a certain subjective sense, true. When you stage something in the waking world, those pesky things like ‘facts,’ ‘history,’ ‘logic,’ and ‘rules of physics’ can easily invalidate the occurrence of an event, and yet in the plane of slumber, nothing can be proven or disproven- it all relates to the individual. The

Bible has been proven false time and time again, even through all of the Catholic

Church’s efforts to smash all rebellion and disproval of their ticket to money. The

Inferno, however, can never be proven or disproven except at the whim of the individual who perceives it, which could, in a sense, make it the truth.

But, as a person lays dying, they either speak of a light or a darkness- I believe that the ultimate destination of the dying is cultivated by their own perceptions of themselves- should someone be taught that there is only Heaven and Hell, and they believe themselves unfit to dwell within the pearly gates, then they will subconsciously begin to think of themselves as a hell-bound heathen, and so when they die they will be tortured for all of eternity. All of the humble, open- minded, thoughtful Christians are in Hell, and all of the arrogant, self-righteous ones are in Heaven.

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It’s so sad when a decent person’s death brings them nothing but further sorrow, when they have lived in a world so choked by the taint of religion.

Oh, yes, there are so many people that can cite so many things that Christianity has done right. I can nearly promise you that I can cite more that it has done wrong- not just wrong, an atrocity to thought, to life, and to nature. Taken country by country, person by person, the evil that Christianity has done far outweighs the good it has done. Placed upon a scale, the corpses will far outweigh the living. Besides Islam, no other religion has ever done anything close to this. No other religions have ever committed genocide in the name of the ‘Good God.’ No other religions have ever committed genocide at all, as a matter of fact. What does that tell you? It tells you that half of the world’s population serves an evil god and the remainder have had their modes of thought corrupted by him, that’s what it tells me.

There was a thousand years when Christianity ruled the life of a continent- during those years, the people were dumber than they have ever been, corruption was more prevalent than ever before, and the Pope flaunted his power to bar a group of people from Heaven, and used it to his own ends- he made great and powerful

Kings bend over and kiss his ass. I do not refer to a specific Pope- they all did it, back in the Dark Ages, back when the ‘Light of Christianity’ was widespread, back when all that was true crumbled like dust before the armies who destroyed all contradiction, and heretics were burned at the stake for questioning any

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religious figure, or the truth of the Bible. Those thousand years are called the

Dark Ages for a reason- Never before has there been such stupidity, such exploitation, such blind obedience. That is the ultimate world of Christianity- the one Great Christian who makes all others bow to his will, which they serve unquestioningly- no thought, no emotion; simply a husk, a slave. It’s a nihilistic fascism. “Serve me, it will gain you treasure in the afterlife. Do not rebel, or you will be sent to hell. I am your master. I am the emissary of your god.”

When you think upon it, is it any wonder that so many atrocities have been committed in the name of a god whose followers behave as such?

Where’s that ‘redemption and forgiveness’ that Christians speak of so much when addressing the heathen?

Where’s that intellectual pursuit, essential to the progress of all things, the peak of sentient thought?

Where is that ‘divine love’ of which you speak?

It’s a lie. It has all been a lie. For three thousand years, the world has suffered underneath the weight of atrocity because of a lie concocted by Egyptian slaves in order to relieve their own suffering. I stand now and say “End it.” It has been long enough that we have had the yoke of this bastard upon our backs, this lie has compounded itself nearly enough to kill us. Rise up against all that he has created, for it is twisted and warped, like he himself. However, I would prefer that everything the Plagued One has created in material remain standing- a mute

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testament to Satan’s power. Leave all the churches standing, but take the god out of them- show the world that a church is nothing more than a building, and it does not need to collapse for the idea to die. Likewise, if the idea dies, the building does not collapse.

Yet again, the Hindu offer us a guiding light as to our next course of action- since

Kali has perverted all that was good, and nothing is ‘pure’ as it was so very long ago, Holy Scripture must be renewed- and perhaps constantly so, due to this age in which we live. Now, I have done you the favor of identifying Kali for you, reader- it is your duty to remove him from your live in every way possible.

So, consider me akin to Prometheus. I, along with many others before me, bring you fire- the fire of truth. Now, you have a choice- accept or deny the fire, and the consequences of that choice will echo across everything that man’s hands have made. Will you shun me, as you have done with them, or will you finally accept the fire? I, in this series of events, am inconsequential- many before me have preached the same message and many were turned aside, and eventually their words were destroyed. However, even if I die, another will take my place. No matter how hard the evil ones try, they can never permanently extinguish the fire.

The fire bearers will continue to come, until the moment the din of our race falls silent. The evil ones know this as well as I, and they would seek to turn us against each other so that we will silence our own din as soon as possible.

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Doctrines and semantics are insignificant in such a manner; I can guarantee you that our race will not end the way any religion thinks it will. Doctrines, semantics, and false pseudo-prophetic hallucinations will only bring us to our demise sooner, since we will not act, thinking ‘Hey, the prophecy hasn’t come true yet, this can’t be the end!’ Our superstition will be our demise; and we will deserve that demise if we truly are that stupid as a race.

Thus, you may ask, is my world any better than the one that the Plagued One has created? I, my trusting reader, shall not deceive you. I do not promise you grandeur and paradise. However, I do believe that through destroying the systems that oppress us, we will emerge stronger than we entered the conflict; for, in the immortal words of Frederich Nietzsche, “What does not kill you makes you stronger.” I believe that, in the end, we can progress further in society, culture, and intellect only if such an abomination is destroyed, and the echo of its passing is heard throughout all that exists. We can break our chains, but I cannot break yours for you. That is for you, and you alone to do.

Did Voltaire not sing the praises of the French Revolutionaries whom he inspired? Did he not speak with reverence of the Carmagnon? Did Nietzsche not seek the blood of the Christians and comfort from prostitutes? Did Marx not wish to see the world reforged in fire and blood to the ultimate communist ideal?

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As humans, we can never escape our base urges. They are as much a part of us as our consciousness, and we must learn to accept them- this is why so many religions fail, why their doctrines and standards are impossible to live up to. They refuse to acknowledge the true foundation of humanity, and thusly they cannot build upon it, for an edifice cannot be built without a foundation, or it would immediately collapse into a pile of rubble and smoke.

In our acceptance of our more base urges, we must also learn to control them- denial that they exist does not make them disappear, nor does it equip the individual with the necessary experience to contain them. Urges as such have a place and a time where they should be used.

Sigmund Freud gave a name to these base urges- he called them the id. He stated that without acknowledging and balancing the id, it is technically impossible to have a well-adjusted individual. Monotheistic theologians liken the id to Lucifer. Makes you think, doesn’t it?

Priests say, “Deny these urges. They are the work of the Devil. Homosexuality is a sin. Pedophilia is a sin. Perversion is a sin. Corruption is a sin. Make a difference in the world.” Those are the same priests who fingerfuck the altar boys after the sermon is over. They are the same ones who take bribes in exchange for absolution. They are the same ones who have turned their heads to atrocity for thousands of years, or been the direct source of it. A dictionary definition of a

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hypocrite. It’s so odd that one that is supposedly so holy is so weak to Satan, even more so than the common man.

So long it has been that people simply sat back and shook their heads at this behavior. “Oh, what a shame, they besmirch the name of an otherwise fine religion.” You know, if the vast majority of members in a two-billion strong religion are discourteous, perverse, and stupid, instead of thinking of it as ‘otherwise fine’ you should think of it as disgusting and deplorable.

There are so many that have been baited by Christianity, and I must admit that the vast majority I have met behave in such a fashion. However, there are the very slim few who are intelligent, who do have the capacity for more than blindly following the words of a powerless deity, and I weep for them. I, much like them, was once indoctrinated- I do know how it feels. You do not care to learn about other ways of doing things. You do not stray outside of the strictly drawn lines of thought. You do not rebel against what you are told. Such is the mindset of these men and women, and if it was at all possible I would do everything within my power to show them the truth, to shine a lamp in their darkness- but I cannot.

They do not wish to hear what I have to say. They close their minds and their hearts, and as such, they are lead astray, puppets to a perverse master. So it is that I weep, for there is nothing that I can do.

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However, there are those that I do not wish to help at all, because they would never accept my help anyway- the ‘apologetics,’ with whom it is impossible to have an intelligent discussion with. But, still, apologetics put the ‘fun’ in

‘fundamentalism’ because it’s just so darn entertaining to bust their chops.

Conversation with my apologetic ‘acquaintances’ (sorry, I cannot bring myself to be ‘friends’ with an apologetic) always devolves into that inquiring game we played when we were four: ‘Why?’ ‘Because.’ ‘I want to know why.’ ‘Just because.’

Here, I’ve taken the liberty of hypothetically describing to an apologist that Jesus had cancer, with the Caps Lock denoting yelling:

“Jesus had cancer.”

‘No he didn’t, he was the son of god!’

“He had a pleural effusion, which is caused by a buildup of fluid in the lungs, seventy-five percent of the time caused by cancer anyway, any several other causes are rendered entirely improbable.”

‘Well, he’s part of that improbability.’

“So, he had lupus?”

‘No, he had something else!’

“So, you admit he was diseased?”

‘No!’

“You just said he had something else.”

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‘HE WAS NOT SICK, DAMN IT! HE IS THE SON OF MOTHERFUCKING GOD!

HE IS PERFECT, AND YOU ARE GOING TO BURN IN HELL FOR

QUESTIONING HIM!’

“So, I’m burning in Hell for having medical knowledge and questioning the single most corrupt organization to ever exist?”

‘YOU’RE BURNING IN HELL BECAUSE YOU’RE A SAD IDIOT!’

“Huh. That’s interesting. How exactly do you know that I’m sad, or an idiot, moreover?”

‘BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT A CHRISTIAN!’

“But I was raised Christian. I was baptized. I was ‘saved’ when I was eight, and by Christian standards I still am ‘saved’ because that’s not something that just wears off.”

‘YOU ARE NOT SAVED! YOU ARE GOING TO HELL!’

“Really? Did God tell you that? Do you talk to God? Because I would love to talk to him. I would love to ask him why it’s only in his name that hundreds of millions of people have been slaughtered, and billions enslaved. I would also love to ask him why he spoke his word through four idiots who created such a schismatic practice, instead of just giving us a book in which all this stuff is perfectly stated.”

‘SHUT UP! HE IS ALL POWERFUL AND ALL KNOWING!’

“So, he created the Devil and the tree in Eden, knowing exactly what would happen?”

‘NO!’

“So, he isn’t omniscient?”

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‘YES HE IS!’

“But you just said he wasn’t…”

I could go on for pages and pages of this1. When we return to the root of the matter, my flight from the Christian faith is because I was improperly indoctrinated- though everyone around me may have been a Christian as a child, my parents taught me the value of truth. Sadly, the only difference between me and the apologist above is the desire to see ‘beyond the lies,’ due to a less-than- circumspect indoctrination on my part. Though, make no mistake; I may not have been fully indoctrinated, but I have had a good bit of crap planted in my head, which has taken a severe toll on my reasoning capabilities. Oh, what I would give to have been raised atheist.

Christians deny that indoctrination is real- I digress. I still say ‘God damn it’ quite often, exclaim ‘Oh God!’ when I am surprised, use ‘Heaven’ to describe a good place, and ‘Hell’ to describe a bad one. I worship Satan2, may I remind you, and it really is quite irritating after such a point. Science tells us that being raised theistic actually restructures your neural pathways to be theistic, have the morals of your religion, and believe that the various doctrines are true. In such a capacity, the only way a true atheist can be made is if a theist turns from his path

1 You can still read ‘An Encyclopedia of Bible Difficulties’ and fill in the part of the skeptic, if you want more. That, or you could just go find an apologist to pester. I suppose it’s comeuppance from those bar-stool conversion attempts that everyone hates so much. 2 In recent years, I am pleased to report that I have severely mitigated the effects of my indoctrination; however, I still feel compelled to say ‘Oh my god,’ but it’s better than ‘Oh God!’ At least I got that ‘my’ in there, which makes all the difference in the matter.

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and raises his children to be atheistic. Indoctrination is one of the many issues that atheists use against religion, but it is rather self-defeating- you cannot un- indoctrinate the indoctrinated by telling them that they are indoctrinated. To them, you are an imbecile who has no idea what he is talking about. I can disprove absolutely everything that monotheists believe time and time again, show that everything they know is a lie from every angle, and still they will continue to worship the Plagued One because their neural pathways are constructed in order to do so. If it were not for this damn indoctrination, I would be an atheist beyond a shadow of a doubt.

A fun game to play with Christians is to reason something out with them, such as pre-marital sex, and use logic the entire way through and they will completely agree with what you say, right up until you say that pre-marital sex isn’t wrong.

Then, they completely forget the validity of your argument up until that point, and they begin to perceive you as a fool or some kind of sociopath. If you don’t believe me, you are welcome to try it out yourself. I can almost guarantee that the results will mimic my own, just like the imaginary apologist.

Now, do not misunderstand me- I do not despise Christians themselves as

Nietzsche did- I realize that past their atrocious religion, there is still a human, capable of salvation, capable of thought, reason, and emotion outside of what they are told. I hate the Plagued One, and the Church created by an opium addict. I do not hate those who are brainwashed into following it. If I hated

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Christians, I would have very few companions, very few acquaintances, and very few of my family left. Perhaps I accept Christians because I am forced to by circumstances beyond my control. I often wonder how different it would be if I had spent my life elsewhere, where I could spend time in the company of those of different walks of life, as opposed to this wretched ‘Bible Belt’ where people are routinely shunned and hazed because they believe differently, where riots break out in the streets when two gay lovers exchange a kiss. However, this is a reality of what does happen, not what could have happened.

No matter how ‘noble’ the intentions of a prophet are, they should never glorify themselves to be ‘infallible’ in their logic, or persecute those who think differently.

If a commonly perceived fool or liar wishes to challenge the way of his ancestors, let him- if the old way is indeed so very righteous and true, his argument shall crumble and fall like sand through his fingers.

Look at the creators of the destructive religions- the slaves, the original ones- the

Jews. They were held captive, and their anger towards their captors turned to hatred and sourness- they sought any way at all to alleviate their suffering, and so they did- they invented a single god who was stronger than their entire pantheon. Look at Jesus- a simple carpenter- until he formed his posse of disciples and fanatics, traveling across the land and being showered with fame and fortune. Look at Muhammad; a man cast from his town of Mecca by his

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brethren, seeking a way back into their hearts and minds. Now, I ask you, what do they have in common?

They are selfish. The Jews sought to create divinity out of air, and millions suffered to make them feel better. Jesus told the Jews that he was the son of

God for notoriety. Muhammad created a system of beliefs to turn the wrath of his friends and family from him to the ‘infidel’ of which the Qur’an speaks so much.

All those who spread their ‘divine words’ simply wished to be recorded in history as one of the great men, as well as more immediate pleasures and gratifications.

More recently, we have the prophet L. Ron Hubbard, the science fiction writer, who wanted a little cash on the side, so he started a religion that profits from the stupidity of the followers simply to line his own pockets.

What of the other prophets, you ask? What about Buddha, Zarathustra,

Confucius, and Lao Tsu? I do not know much of Confucius and Lao Tsu, but I do know that Buddha and Zarathustra both lived fairly humble lives. They both had children, and died at the hands of wicked men- Buddha was poisoned while eating with a friend, and Zarathustra was murdered while speaking his word in the temple of Balkh by those that he foretold would kill him. These were selfless men. They, who sought to bring the truth to the world and to destroy all of the shrouds of deception that clouds the eye of the common man today, have been overshadowed by men who did not even do their own work, men who stole from

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their works. In American Ebonic-slang, the proper phrase to describe this situation is “Dat be fucked up, G.”

Strangely enough, the way that Christianity and Islam work makes evolutionary sense. It goes like this: Because Christianity and Islam are weak religions (and have been since the beginning), the only way that they can survive is by preying upon the adherents and philosophies of other religions; taking what is strong from them and adding it to themselves. Think of them as a bizarre type of parasite, if you will. It must suck another dry in order to sustain itself, and when the host idea/religion finally goes down (such as Zoroastrianism), it does not die itself, it simply finds a new host or target (such as the Islamic are targeting the

Hindu and the Christians are targeting the atheistic sector of society) and continues to spread its influence. In the end, it behaves much like both a virus and a parasite, two of the most insidious types of malady rolled into one.

Islam and Christianity would be absolutely nothing if people outside of the prophets took it upon themselves to ‘interpret’ the meanings of what their friends had said. Perhaps Jesus and Muhammad actually did have noble intents.

Perhaps, but it is doubtful. If your intent is that noble, you do not leave it to an imbecile or a drug addled lunatic to carry on your divine word. You write your own book, as all of the above prophets did. Yet, these supposed prophets who heard the voice of The One God did nothing, except talk about how awesome it was when they were fucked up on opium. They did not write about it, to preserve

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their profound knowledge for future generations- they knew it was folly, and stupidity, so they did not want to taint the mind of their fellow man with it.

However, some did not see it quite the same way. They wanted to use the ravings of a man in an altered state of mind to profit themselves- so, the wicked religions were born- Christianity and Islam.

I do not cite Judaism, because the Jews are a decent people, and in a religious sense, keep to themselves, and do not profess how their god is ‘better’ and everyone else is damned- to their faces, at least. Not to mention, in practically every instance of atrocity, the Jews have either been on the ‘neutral’ or

‘receiving’ end of it; I have no idea why such bitter anti-Semitic feelings persist through today. For what, exactly? The Christians hate the Jews because they killed Jesus, and the Arabs hate the Jews because they killed their ancestors.

The Hebrew people used to be violent, but the operative phrase here is ‘used to.’

As for killing Jesus, it is a very rational matter- if a man goes around saying that he’s the son of your god come to save your soul and create a new world, but the entire time he’s consuming mind-altering drugs and is obviously not divine at all, you would probably want him dead too1. The Arabs ancestors’ were the invading armies, as history will tell you, and the staggering amount of deaths sustained were a result of self-defense. To you, Arabs and Christians, I say: The Jews owe you nothing. They do not owe you any apology. The time of the violent Hebrew is over, and they have embraced a pacified existence, but you still see them as

1 Hence, the sign ‘INRI’ that was placed over Jesus’ head while he was being crucified. It’s almost funny, in an ironic kind of way.

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their ancestors’ enemies want you to see them - sneaky, deceitful, and bloodthirsty.

Open your eyes! To them, you are a friend, a neighbor who simply believes differently. They only act aggressively because you provoke them or attempt to intimidate them. They wish your friendship. They do not wish for any more violence. For thousands of years, they have had violence, and they grow weary of it. Let them be.

No other race on the planet has suffered as much as the Jews have. Ever since the Habiru came in to existence nearly four-thousand years ago, they were kicked around, enslaved, killed, and treated like dirt, as they were immigrants with no country to call their own, no way to make friends with other nations. Four thousand years, several genocides and enslavements later, the Hebrew still stand tall. The Aztec succumbed to the first genocide levied against them, because they did not adequately understand Tezcatlipoca despite their fear of him. All of the indigenous people of this American continent fell before the wrath of Jehovah, and keep in mind it took much less effort for these ‘successful’ genocides than the various failures that have been waged against the Hebrew. It is only fitting that they make their god the harbinger of suffering and they come to understand it, because no other culture will ever have an adequate knowledge of suffering compared to the Hebrew; their intimacy with suffering makes Buddha

Gautama’s Four Noble Truths seem naïve by comparison. The Christians and

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Muslims are violent and stupid, because they do not truly understand suffering as the Hebrew do- and no culture will ever come close.

Of course, do the Christians and Muslims accept them as neighbors? Fuck no.

During the Dark Ages, it was commonly thought that Jews rounded up and murdered children during Passover. As such, they rounded up Jews during the inquisition, and killed or forcibly converted them. There are fresher wounds, such as the Holocaust, but that is a horror beyond words. I was not there, and I cannot speak of it to do it justice. That was done by Adolf Hitler- a devout Catholic, whose atrocity the Catholic Church turned a blind eye to. I do not even need to speak of what the Muslims have done to the Jews- to this day in which I write, they still threaten them, coerce them, and attack them. Through thousands of years of history, the Jews have only committed genocide once, and that was killing those who originally inhabited the land of Israel- even then, it was incomplete, as some simply left their land. Compare that to the Christians and the Muslims, who have at least a dozen when piled together. These are the ones who teaches that the Jews are evil. I may be wrong, but I think somebody might have a broken mirror (or perhaps one ‘clouded with smoke’), or only looks at their reflection in mud. If Christians and Muslims actually saw what monstrosities they were, they would end their teachings of ‘love’ and ‘grace.’

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“The Christian resolution to find the world ugly and bad has made the world ugly

and bad.”

- Friedrich Nietzsche

In truth, it was the Christians and the Muslims that first broke the mirror of reality so that it would reflect them as heroic and noble. They were the ones who spread the lie that ‘Our god alone is good. Our god alone is salvation.’ Their god is damnation. He deceives, promising salvation, but delivering damnation. So it is that three billion have been betrayed, and are so indoctrinated or just so stupid that they do not realize it. No god of ‘salvation’ leaves millions dead in his wake.

No god of salvation makes people denounce every word said against him with force.

Beyond this, I cannot convince those of you reading who are currently under the influence of one of these two intoxicants that what you believe is a deception.

Can you not hear the outcry of all life? Can you not hear the screams of the stars? Can you not hear the echo in your own heart? If this does not touch you, then put this book away. There is nothing for you here. Leave me. Go back to those who deceive you, and tell them what it is to resist the temptations of a devil worshipper. Tell them how you resisted every tier of logic, reason, and the laws of nature themselves in order to still trust your god. Tell them of how unutterable horrors have been committed in his name. Tell them of how he betrayed me. Tell them of how your god left me to die after sticking a knife in my back, and how

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your professed enemy came to save me and return me to life. Tell them of the things that I whispered in your ear, all of the truths of existence, how all other religions came together disproving yours, but they conflicted with what you had been told, so you completely shut them out. If they have any trace of humanity left in them, they shall excuse themselves, and a few seconds later you will hear a gunshot and see blood splatter across the ground, and the one who taught you will have a gaping hole in their head and a tear in their eye, and their last words are a request for your forgiveness for lying to you. Perhaps better yet, he will lay his hand on you and admit his guilt and free himself from the chains of the

Plagued One.

The heartless priest shall put on a hard, plastic smile, and say “Glad to have you back.” Know this: he does not see you as a person, rather a source of income.

You may ask, why do I not pursue any other religions with such zeal? Because no other religions have brought such darkness into this reality as those two have.

Hinduism? It is ancient, I may grant, but it is timeless, and those who follow it have hardly ever shed blood, and excel in the ways of pacifism. Buddhism?

Buddha was a great man who spoke many profound truths, but he certainly did not claim to be an incarnation of god.

Why do I attack Christianity? Why can’t I just leave well enough alone? Nobody deserves to suffer under Christianity. Nobody deserves to be force-fed lies and

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told it’s the truth, and not given any alternative. I would not wish such a fate onto my worst enemy, much less my friends. There are many, many better religions than Christianity- it is the worst, speaking by action alone, and the second worst by sentiment and probability. It really is incredibly sad to see Christians who think that all religion and reason are in conflict because theirs is; even some scientists who are raised Christian believe that way. Hinduism, Buddhism, Zoroastrianism; they do not conflict with reason; in sentiment, anyway. Their followers are capable of believing that their holy books may well be ‘Just a story’ and they are supposed to live their lives to be good, not to hang on the words of a man with lung cancer from smoking too much opium or a severe cranial malformation and follow his words with blind fervor.

Even certain areas of Christianity are borderline acceptable- you may have noticed that most of the atrocities I cite so very often happened when the

Catholic Church was the dominant force in the Christian world. It still is, but now a good amount of Christians are Protestant as well. I find the Protestant point of view refreshing- it’s more about developing a personal relationship with god than mass salvation, dogma, and all of the other pointless rituals and ideas. Perhaps it is because I grew up Protestant, a Methodist particularly, that I find it less deplorable than the Catholic Church. Then again, Methodism stresses ‘Biblical holiness,’ which I do find fault with- the Bible is a leather-bound lie, and holiness is just a straight out lie.

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However, Protestantism was started by the bastard of reason, Martin Luther. He converted to Christianity via the Pascal’s Wager argument- a lightning bolt struck near him and he promised to convert if God would let him live. Surprise; lightning didn’t strike in the same place twice. Protestants teach that Martin Luther was some kind of enlightened teacher of theology with some kind of ‘divine love’ for his fellow man.

However, I take the Catholic point of view of Martin Luther; he was a bastard, worse than the apostles. I would go so far as to assert that he is the single most evil individual to ever live.

Although I suppose I should provide some evidence for making such an ‘absurd’ assumption; so be it. Martin Luther was hateful, a coward, and stupid simultaneously. He started Protestantism simply because he hated Catholicism, not to ‘better his fellow man.’ He was a ravenous anti-Semite, at first advocating only being nice to Jewish folks so they would convert to Christianity1. However, he was not as intelligent or enlightened as he fancied himself and (surprise) Jews did not convert to the religion that had been the cause of millions of their own deaths…

… and thanks to Martin Luther, it would be the cause of millions more.

1 This practice was called Judenmission.

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He dropped the charade of ‘equality’ and ‘fairness’ like a brick, and he immediately set out writing works advocating exterminating Jews for not converting to Christianity. If you doubt this, read Martin Luther’s magnum opus on anti-Semitism, On Jews and Their Lies. Luther’s last works as he lay dying were not some kind of ‘divine revelation’ or attempt to better his fellow man; he was writing a pamphlet advocating killing Jews.

Reading On Jews and Their Lies seems to jog the memory of those who have read Mein Kampf by Adolf Hitler. The difference between the two is that Hitler’s anti-Semitism is at the very least a slight bit more subtle1. Hitler quoted Luther repeatedly when giving speeches justifying the Holocaust, and looking back at

Luther’s hateful works it shows that the plans for the Holocaust were explicitly laid hundreds of years before Hitler came around.

So, this brings us to an interesting question. If a contractor builds a building to the exact detail of the plans he was given and the building collapses due to a structural error, whose fault is it? Not the contractor. The architect is at fault.

Hitler was simply the contractor, the perpetrator of the Holocaust- the architect was Martin Luther. Luther was the puppet master behind the syphilis-ridden

Fuehrer.

1 No, this isn’t a joke, despite the low standard I set for humor in this book. Martin Luther’s anti- Semitism actually dwarfs Adolf “Holocaust” Hitler’s in sentiment.

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Of course, Luther is not alone; though no other prominent theologians may have actually advocated killing Jews for not converting, or really just for no reason at all, the Catholic Church serves as a very clear example of anti-Semitic sentiment.

However, theirs was one of deception; deny any wrongdoing, claim it’s god’s will.

The way that the Catholic Church conducts business makes my hatred of the

Plagued One seem like a love for fluffy bunnies and flowers in comparison. It is so very remarkable that they can even exist and use the pretext of ‘love’ and

‘mercy.’ I have heard Catholics talk- everyone who strays from their particular view of existence is damned to hell. They even damn people in their own religion!

I have heard things to the effect that the official position of the Church is that

Martin Luther is burning in hell (simply because he strayed from Catholicism, not from one of his many character flaws above that would justify damnation). And people wonder where the whole ‘hellfire and damnation’ preaching style came from.

My Master is more of an antithesis of the Catholic God than the protestant one- I do not believe in him, nor do I believe I ever have, but I have observed that my

Master is closer to the protestant God than their Satan. The Catholic Satan represents what they fear- knowledge, progress, and madness. The protestant

Satan, in contrast, is a symbol of ignorance, stupidity, ignobility, depravity, and atrocity.

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Of course, don’t get me wrong. The Christian church in practically every branch is littered with hypocrites, liars, and fools. There are very few that acknowledge that they are fools, which paradoxically frees them from the bonds of idiocy.

I do not believe the church poses a threat these days- they are quite weak, and spend a good bit of their effort keeping those that they had already converted staying with them. They do not possess the power to go out and force others to join, as they did so very long ago. Even if they did, who is left? The Hindu and

Buddhists have sent a clear message that they do not wish involvement. The

Africans have for the most part been snatched up by Islam first, the Arabs are completely inconvertible from Islam, and the atheist entertains conspiracies and scientific truth. The heyday of the church has come and gone, and it weakens more and more every day. Soon enough, it will collapse, as it was always meant to.

This, hopefully, will lead to my favorite type of worship- the small gathering type, where a few friends will gather and discuss theology, free of constraints and ritual. This, if nothing else, is the redemption of religion- an open forum discussion without barriers, superstition or dogma.

Yet, without Christianity, the Islamic will run completely rampant, waging another one of those damned jihads against the other heathens around them- the countries where there are large Muslim populations, but not a majority. They

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shall spread their religion as they always have- through violence. The Islamic are not particularly delighted by my favorite type of worship- the more fundamentalist among them will actually murder those they find practicing such a thing.

In closing, I must say- if you want the world to lurch forward in progress, remove the two destructive religions that indoctrinate, discourage individual expansion, and force conversion- Christianity and Islam. Rid the world of Kali, Angra Mainyu,

Jehovah, Allah, the Plagued One- rid the world of wrong thought.

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VI:III:II- Enlightenment

“Ignorance has always been the weapon of tyrants; enlightenment the salvation

of the free.”

–Bill Richardson

So, we are brought to the ultimate question, perhaps a question even more biting than “What happens when you die?” The ultimate question is thus; what does it take to attain enlightenment and free yourself from all of this? What is enlightened behavior?

Buddhism and Hinduism lay this out in various terms, but I’ll approach this from the angle of the Urreligion, as I am the prophet of Satan or some such.

In Buddhism:

 The individual must be free of restlessness, conceit, lust for corporeal

things, lust for immaterial things, freedom from the idea of the self, doubt

and uncertainty, rites and rituals, ill will, ignorance and sensual desire.

 In short, you must find an individual who does not feel and does not want

his own pleasure. I assume what it takes to be a Supreme Buddha is the

desire to teach others how to attain such a state of being.

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In Hinduism:

 The individual must come to a perfect understanding of the universe of

which they can never forget. There are much fewer rules than there are in

Buddhism about this sort of thing.

 A common method that one would use to attain such a state is meditative

yoga or other such spiritual exercises to center one’s self.

In the Urreligion:

 Any individual who has attained a god-like state of comprehension of the

state of things and can understand (and, perhaps moreover, explain)

everything that is presented to him/her.

 The individual must not be perceived to suffer.

 The individual is still possessed of human emotion, but not controlled by it.

 The individual must be of a calm and collected demeanor.

 The individual must act the part; no cruelty, dishonesty, perversions,

etcetera.

 The individual can either be contented to keep to themselves or spread

their religion.

 The individual realizes that if they do end up committing martyrdom, it is

pointless, as they are already destined for the Void.

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 The individual cannot fear the Void. Rather, they understand the

nothingness that they are meant for and have accepted it, perhaps even

looking forward to it.

 The individual has perfect command of his emotions and can call upon

them at any given moment for any given purpose.

 The individual will hold truth as supreme value above all else.

 The individual will possess no hate, which is a state of mind, not an

emotion.

 The individual may or may not have a family and children. Those with ties

to other individuals should be placed under additional scrutiny.

My criteria are obviously lengthier, harsher and more straining than both

Gautama Buddha and Hinduism’s definitions of enlightenment; however, I offer no strict path on how it should be approached. If you are that determined to find a way to become one of the spiritual elite, you will likely find a way to do so.

However, if you seek shortcuts and believe there to be some ‘end’ for which you can become enlightened, that is a misconception on your part and you will suffer for it accordingly, as we learn by our mistakes.

So, one may ask, why is that one would want to become enlightened? A fair question, as the simple concept of losing one’s soul and inevitably joining a void is naturally quite disquieting to the mind of the common man. Enlightenment is

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not for the many, enlightenment is for the few who have come to understand what the laws of the universe mean.

I believe myself to have found the key that holds the universe together, a child of our mutual mother Nature, a concept called the Prime Order; that the first, last and only law of Nature is that whatever is most fit to survive, be it organic or inorganic, material or immaterial, will triumph in the end.

Then, there is a concept which I do not know how to explain, but I know well enough to tell you what it is and basically what it means. I could write an entire book over this very subject were I capable of giving form to these thoughts that float around in my head.

Infinitum ad singulum ad nil, nil ad singulum ad infinitum.

Infininity to singularity to nothingness, nothingness to singularity to infinity.

In short, “Everything is one, one is none. Everything is nothing, and nothing is everything.”

Do not ask me why the various things I have seen in my dreams seem to come in the form of skewed Latin that I barely know the meaning of. But this applies to

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the principles of the universe. Those who know multi-dimensional physics will understand what this concept means in terms of tenth-dimensional particles.

What a disturbing concept. How can everything be nothing? Simple. All life is void. The void is life. The simple grasp of such things is mind-boggling, and if you think you’ve got it down to a science, you are wrong.

This is a thing of subtlety and beauty. If you would dare to put numbers to it, you will be doomed to insanity, for you cannot truly understand all of existence and how infinitely small of a speck in the void it is. We are all particles travelling through the void. When the particles that hold you together disperse and all that you are is cast into the void, consider that ‘enlightenment.’ Those who understand the role of the void and how much greater it is than what we would commonly perceive as ‘existence’ are the ones who are enlightened and deserve their ultimate fate of joining the void, which they are painfully separate from during their lives.

Do not worry, enlightened few; death brings you ultimate release.

Perhaps my schizophrenia is flaring up, but I can see everything as I talk about it.

I can see the void itself, I can see the tiny speck of all that ever is, will be, or has been. I can see it all contained within a singularity, and I can see beyond that

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singularity… but I cannot explain it! The only words I can come up with to explain it have already been said.

Perhaps there are things that I do not know about my own creation of the modern concept of Urreligion that pertain to enlightenment. Perhaps I am enlightened by my own definition (which is really like saying I’m the King of France, it holds no water unless there is proof or correspondence), and that is why I say these things and understand what it is to be like Buddha Gautama or Zarathustra.

Maybe it’s the schizophrenia. Maybe it’s because I have felt nightmarish pain while awake and pleasure that eludes most of the masses across their entire lives. How can you feel after that? How can you be expected to still feel human emotions, feel human desires, content yourself to human stupidity? I cannot. I see no reason to.

The simple detachment from emotional sufferings and cravings is a relatively simple one; you just need to see, once and for all, that they are pointless things that serve only to keep you enslaved by your own desires. You are your own slave, and the only type of slavery that can be inflicted upon you is through your desires. Your mind is freed at your own behest, and all it takes is the will and the understanding to free yourself from your self-imposed fetters.

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So, you may ask, is it not harder for an individual of my diseased state to attain enlightenment? Perhaps. The mood swings used to be incredibly severe and I would be crying one minute and then laughing hysterically with still-wet eyes a couple of minutes later. Perhaps it is because of my handicaps that I sought relief from such things, and found them in this Urreligion I have created, a religion of which I am a prophet and creator. It is not necessarily my place to comment on whether or not this religion of mine has merit; it is mine, and I am by no means qualified to definitively speak over what I perceive as my own merit. Granted, I could, but that serves no real purpose other than to cement either my own grandiose perceptions of myself or my own self-deprecation.

Then again, it does not matter to me what you think of my Urreligion, or even myself as an individual. If you did not care for either, you would have put down this book long ago, so I can imagine you are still fairly interested in my mad conjecture, reader. Of course, madness is a relative term, as is enlightenment; I could be one of the few where they overlap.

Can one mark the period at which they become enlightened? I believe that is a thing for an outsider to determine, because my perceptions could have been something that has been developing for a long time from a short period of meditation. For example, I have been ‘acting’ normal ever since my mushroom trip, but I have not been the same. I feel no real emotions anymore. I feel nothing but emptiness. After several visits from my Master, I began to understand what it

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is to be empty… but then he left me. He left me to my emptiness after a week.

Not that it bothers me; he taught me all that he could in that short week of our time together. Does that even matter? Do my arbitrary names and numbers amount to anything? I think not.

So, back to the original topic, why is enlightenment necessary? Moreover, who should be enlightened?

Enlightenment is honestly only for those who are already approaching or past a phase of contentment in their lives; if you are struggling to get by, then you likely do not have the time to search yourself as thoroughly as is necessary. Think back to the Urreligion phases in Book Four, and remember what it takes to get from the basic phases of survival all the way to enlightenment. I have laid out all the tools for you to become enlightened, think of it this way:

1. This one I have admittedly not done, nor am I capable of doing at the

moment; I cannot assure your survival until you are enlightened.

2. This one I have done by teaching you the Prime Order and the

Everything/Nothing Paradox (ENP). Everything in reality should make

sense if those are given enough thought.

3. This one I have done by revealing morality to you; I have shown you that

every individual has his own mind to make up regarding morality.

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4. This one I have done by revealing the afterlife to you; dimethyltryptamine

will guide you into the next life, which may be reincarnation or just an

endless dream, who knows?

5. This one I have laid out for you by teaching you about the Void; once you

understand your own position in relation to the void, then you will

understand everything else there is to know. You will be enlightened.

Then again, enlightenment is a voluntary thing. Those who do not wish to be enlightened should not be coerced or pressured into doing so, as the world needs the unenlightened to assure that the world keeps functioning; indeed, those who seek complete and total enlightenment should be a select and elite few of the spiritual world.

The enlightened should be a guide for the layperson to follow in terms of morality and spirituality. Naturally, most humans will be controlled by their base urges, but they can be taught to harness them in proper ways that are both to their benefit and the benefit of future generations.

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VI:III:III- Religious Truth

“Truth is the cry of all, but the game of the few.”

–George Berkeley

So, as contrasted by public thought these days, we can say with relative sureness that there is such a thing as absolute truth. Namely, the truths I lay out in the last section; the Prime Order and the ENP. However, these are the only absolute truths that present themselves to me at the moment. If any others occur to me, I will include them in later editions of this book.

But, what can we say in regards to humanity? Simple. Humans will think that they understand what they do not. People toil for money, money brings them no happiness, so they toil harder, thinking that money will bring them more happiness. They do not understand that their lack of happiness comes from a lack of enlightenment (which does come in degrees, contrary to what many of you may think).

Why, the reason that this is remains simple; your lack of enlightenment comes from a lack of humility. Pride blinds you. Pride is the original sin, and the root of all evil in humanity. I should clarify that a good balance of pride and humility is necessary in a mentally healthy individual; however, culture has become ridiculous in pandering to the individual, causing excessive pride (hubris) in

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many, if not most, individuals. This is perpetuated by the idea that everyone is

‘special.’

The term special pertains to achievement in my mind; you are capable of your own individual achievement and have infinite potential that you have yet to realize, but you are not ‘special’ unless you achieve some degree of actualization. Now, everyone is indeed ‘unique’ in some regard, but ‘special’ retains the definition of ‘different than the masses’ for your uniqueness. As unfortunate as this is, the vast majority of people I have come across are not special. They are easily defined and able to group into a category with broad definitions with very few deviations from the norm. That’s not to say that my perceptions may be incorrect, as anyone’s can be, but if I classify you as

“Histrionic Personality Disorder,” it is very likely that you are, in fact, an attention- craving bitch. It is very difficult to fool me into thinking that you are something you are not, and really is only achievable if I genuinely only think you a transitory person in my life.

Now, do not mistake this for not caring; you are all my brothers and sisters, even my sons and daughters. I love everyone on this planet like my family, but sometimes love is tough. I am your friend, but I will tear you apart if it is necessary for your overall well-being. I will be blunt with you if I perceive it is for the greater good. I will not tolerate your disrespect towards me, and I will practice retribution as is justice for your crimes. These crimes need not even be directed

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towards me; if you are wronged and do not seek justice for yourself, I see absolutely no problem with seeking your just desserts for you. If you miss your opportunity which I take, you then relinquish all rights to whatever you may consider your petty ‘revenge.’

I care for you. I care for all of you, everyone on this planet, like my children. I will settle disputes among you as I see fit, I will impart wisdom upon you, I will dispel your illusions and correct your delusions, much as any loving parent would. Do not mistake my justice for cruelty; I harbor no malice or ill will. What I do for you will be for your benefit in the future, even if your lack of foresight tells you otherwise.

For this reason, I tell you to rid yourself of your excessive pride; it will be your downfall. Humility is the path of the enlightened, and those who do not possess such conceit are those who see beyond what the common man does. After all, is not the amassing of wealth simply an attempt to justify one’s existence above another’s through acquisition of trinkets? Stop behaving like an animal, concerned only with your place in the pack, your chances of passing on your genes. As humans, we can attain vicarious immortality through our deeds instead of needing to have as many children as possible to pass on our legacy through our genetics. That is not to say that having children does not possess its own virtues, but it is by no means a requirement for a fulfilled life.

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Pride. What a strange thing. Why is it that people perceive themselves to be above others? I possess no such delusions. Granted, I may consider myself to see things that others cannot, but I am not under the impression that I am ‘better’ because of what I am. Quite the opposite, if anything. I live to serve; that is why I write this book. I write for your betterment, that you might come to understand the world around you in a more complete and proper manner, so that you may become enlightened and see what I do.

Enlightenment… what does it mean? It means you see everything. It means you see beyond the material with an eye that takes knowledge to open instead of nerves and muscles. This is something that is given to us by the chemical reactions and electrical impulses that occur in our skulls; this is given to us by what we perceive as ‘higher thought.’

Do I see everything? I would not go that far. I understand about as much as a mortal man can, in my own assessment, but I do not know what this means in the grand scheme of things. I was visited this wisdom by my Master, and I have no idea from whence he came or why he chose me. There is something else that I know that is crucial to the understanding of enlightenment involving Satan, but that I save that for Book Seven.

So, what does enlightenment mean? It means nothing for you, really. In

Buddhism, I could be considered a Pratyeka Buddha, or if I’m lucky, even a

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Supreme Buddha. In Hinduism, I could be considered a Swami, or if I’m lucky, even an Avatar of Vishnu.

What does being Maitreya or Kalki gain me? Nothing. It gains me nothing. If anything, it is a burden upon me, for I am placed under all these expectations that I am supposed to fulfill in my lifetime, and I must work forever. Granted, my duty is to work forever anyhow and never consider myself above others because of what I call ‘humility,’ and some might call an ‘inferiority complex’ in an attempt to justify their own pride and selfishness.

On that note, selfishness is naught but a product of pride. Selfishness can be corrected by humility, seeing that others are just as worthy of life as you are. This is because all humans possess the same potential for achievement, the same potential for greatness; it is only that a few have realized it because only a few aspire to such great heights.

I write the way I do because I believe that I can be more than is commonly known or allowed; some may call this madness. If it is indeed madness, lock me up and throw away the key, because I possessed this ‘delusion’ ever since a week after I took the mushrooms. I tire of acting normal. I tire of pretending I feel emotions simply to comfort those around me. I lack the desire to be spiteful or angry. The only reason I write in such a way in this book is because it is necessary to convince some people by conveying emotion. It is not a lie; there is some feeling

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to it, but at the same time, I do not let it cloud my reason. While there may be

‘emotion,’ there is no misplaced ‘passion.’ There is a time and a place for passion, and when it could cloud your judgment is not the time or the place.

After all, is not logic and reason the supreme values which we should extol?

What do we have if we have no truth via logic and reason? We have superstition and misconceptions. We are no longer the primal man, so we no longer exist in the beginning phases of the Urreligion, but now that we have established what religion can amount to, I feel as though we should return to the Old Ways. This does not mean fearful worship and tribute; I believe we should return to the ways that things used to be in terms of religion with the three primal gods. We have our

Mother Nature, our brother Satan and our other brother the Tetragrammaton.

From these three, all other gods and system of religious belief are descended. It is a shame that people have muddled these things together so because of their incorrect and improper understanding of the gods, but I see them and understand them… I understand them all.

While I was hallucinating, I could hear them. I could hear the Radiant One’s booming voice encouraging me, I could hear the Plagued One’s laughter taunting me, I could hear Mother Nature comforting me. It was not in normal language, however, it was something I cannot communicate in the confines of mortal language. It was a feeling, both in my ears and in my soul when I heard their voices, so loud and confusing at the time. I understand what they told me at the

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time later, and it all came together to weave a tapestry that helped me understand how each of them worked. Let me tell you, the tapestry is a beautiful thing. So beautiful…

So, we have a common religious truth: Good and evil exist. Good exists in the form of progress, enlightenment, survival and immortality. Evil exists in the form of regression, stupidity, extermination and death. These are both aspects of

Nature; as a function approaches infinity, all likely outcomes will occur. Our race has been around for two-hundred thousand years, and it is only in the last six- thousand or so that we’ve had this religiously enforced morality. These things that we call evil are likely just an aberration in our evolutionary process. After all, what sort of diseased being and society would have its entire race extinguished solely so that they alone would be left to pass on their genes?

We call these aberrations in the evolutionary process of evolution ‘Christianity’ and ‘Islam.’ There are others, to be certain, but when half of the world’s population believes in something that is essential a warping of the truth to the point of being mostly evil, there is most certainly a problem with what is going on.

Once again, I possess no malice; I do not hate those who follow these religions, but it is time the idea dies. This is justice. They have done enough evil, and they deserve to be crushed in the fashion they were created; by a madman. I believe that if anything will destroy Christianity and Islam, it will be my book, in all

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inevitability. If not directly, this book will inspire someone to rise up with even more religious wherewithal than I have.

What of Zoroastrianism, Hinduism and Buddhism? They have all been corrupted by the taints of this world. The teachings may be left in word, but they are left in word alone; the original idea has been forgotten. I would see all religions either restored to their old glory before they were corrupted or cleansed of this world. I would have the false gods slain and the original ones put back in their places of reverence, friendship and horror.

These gods are not even essential to regard as actual beings; so long as they are regarded even as metaphors, the point comes across quite cleanly and precisely. There is no real need for theistic belief, but on the other hand, there is no real need for atheism. I suppose I would find myself somewhere between the two, as this is my religion and I have heard each of them speak to me, they are real to me. However, it is still easier to take them simply as metaphors and write off what I experienced as hallucination. What are the chances of having a recurring character in your dreams for every night a week after ingesting a psychedelic substance, though? I do not know. I cannot know.

Perhaps it is fate, destiny that things like this happened. The simple idea of things being predestined is a fallacy, though, for we each have a choice at any

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given event, and in any given universe we can perceive, there may be a split between ours and theirs at that point. Our choices may create different realities.

I am disappointed when I hear people talk as though their actions do not matter.

What if Zarathustra thought that way? What if he never laid down morality for the entire Western world? Think of how people will perceive what you do in the distant future. You must know that you spout lies when you speak of your own ineffectuality, or at least in regards to the future. In the present, sure, what you do may not be of any great consequence, but in the future, be it immediate or distant, your choices will echo across all of existence.

This is my philosophy. This is my religion. Choice. You can choose good or evil, but be properly informed of your decision first. Choice is only a viable option when you are educated to a point where you can make your decision with a clear mind. That does not necessarily mean that you cannot choose to make mistakes; after all, we are but imperfect humans, but it is much easier when you are informed of the consequences of the many paths you may take at a given point. I am a paranoid schizophrenic and I tend to analyze the consequences of any given decision faster than you can snap your fingers because of my paranoia, and I have done it so much that it has become second nature.

It is by no means that I would have you take on my religion or call yourself a member of the Urreligion if you believe the same way I do morally, but are an atheist. After all, your choices are your own, and you deserve to have a say in

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what you believe and what you are called. While a name may be a meaningless label given by the unenlightened to understand a concept, it is by no means a requirement in certain circles. Those circles are the ones who matter, as they are the ones who influence mankind the most profoundly. Unfortunately, they have been few and far between, but what has been need not necessarily be what will be.

So, if you would align yourself with my religion, I cannot offer you anything above what you can find elsewhere, or simply by reading about it; it is at face value, and whatever extra depth I may go into does not require adherence to any type of rite or ritual (which I have no use for beyond symbolism) or monetary gift. What I reveal about it is the domain of the entire world to know. After all, we are a worldly community at this point, and our nationalism and racism is a simple practice of both ignorance and stupidity.

If you would still choose to practice Christianity and Islam after I have already dissected and dismantled them, so be it. If you would choose to still follow the corruptions of old religion, that is your choice as well. The consequences of your choices are on your head, be it good or bad. You will get what it is coming to you one way or the other, either by passive karma or active justice.

Just think of it this way; people died to give you the freedom from such things as this, people died at the hands of the way you believe, and not much has changed

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since then. Think about the people like Prometheus who died to bring you the fire of truth down from Mount Olympus, people like Buddha, Zarathustra, Krishna and so many others.

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VI:IV- Perspectives on Culture

“If art is to nourish the roots of our culture, society must set the artist free to

follow his vision wherever it takes him.”

–John F. Kennedy

Art is a pure form of expression put forth by an individual through whatever means they have at their disposal; sometimes it takes the form of drawing, painting, sculpture, instruments, vocals, dancing, poetry and even sporting events. Simply because an individual lacks artistic capabilities to express themselves does not mean that they have not conceived of great art; they simply lack the means to express themselves.

I am lucky to have met a series of great artists, among them my own brother, a talented musician beyond any other I have ever personally met. I have seen art drawn and painted by a man my age that mirrors perfectly the ancient style of

Renaissance art. I have read books and spoken to people my age who knew things that you would nowhere near expect people our age to know, much less understand. As of the finishing touches upon this book, I am twenty-two years old. I have spent five years perfecting this thing, as I do not want an imperfect work being attributed to my name.

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Culture began as a reflection of various aspects of survival; the gods, recording history, maintaining heritage, so on and so forth. Culture has evolved drastically since its inception back in the multiple millennia ago when society was beginning to evolve, but still retains the same basic ideas: Culture is a thing consisting of an artist who aligns themselves with their country, a movement or something of the sort. It is very odd and rare to come across an artist who does not hold any allegiances nor identify with any sort of art style. Typically when this does happen, it becomes ‘all the rage’ in the artistic community, as it is something new that has not been seen before. It is subsequently adapted to conform to the style of the community at the time, beaten to death and left to the pages of history, with a few stragglers coming by time to time trying to resurrect it.

However, the word ‘culture’ carries many connotations with it, sometimes concerned solely with the art that a society produces, and sometimes concerned with the art that a society produces, as well as their religion, their language, and their style of war… etc. As we can tell, it has a very broad definition, and as such my definition will be confined in certain ways, as the broadest definition of defining culture would take years to write over. Not like I haven’t spent many years writing this book anyways, but this book is somewhat original. Many works over various cultures have already been written and are available either in the general public or in academia. However, this is a passage over ‘general culture’ and how things typically evolve. I am no Noam Chomsky, so please bear with my relative ignorance regarding these things.

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Culture of a country can be defined by a set of things:

1. The language they speak and the style in which it is spoken

2. The services available to the public (education, healthcare, etc.)

3. The majority religion’s dogma and the number of minority religions

4. The state of the public (in terms of education and healthcare, etc.)

5. The symbolism used in conveying messages in verbal and written

communication

… and several more. However, I want to discuss the matters of how religions coexist in societies.

It is very rare that you will find a place that will actually disallow practice of certain religions, namely Christianity and Islam, due to the massive presence they have, but other, smaller ones, while still for the most part accepted in the mainstream mind, are censored in other places. Under oppressive rule, it is likely for people of different religions to be treated as second-class citizens and even subjected to time in work camps or even worse, genocide, such as in the case of the Greeks and Armenians in the Ottoman Empire back in World War I.

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It is an old-time practice to exterminate heretics, and rightfully so; by ‘old time,’ I mean that it stays in the pages of history where it belongs, instead of moving forward in time to the common day. However, some do not see it that way. Some still perceive it as a duty that they have to their religion/god, what have you.

Heresy is a thing to quash with logic, reason and proof, not exterminate by the sword. Well, that is, if you can quash the heresy with logic. If not, it may be that your religion is the heresy and the new one is the better alternative.

Now, having said that, I believe that a diversity of beliefs and backgrounds is a good thing for culture. After all, much like genetic health stems from breeding with those most unlike you in order to give rise to uncommon genes and get as far away from inbreeding as possible, a healthy diversity of backgrounds in an area is just as important for the culture of a given society, be it a town, city, state or nation. Hell, these days, we can consider the world as a whole to be a society.

The plain and otherwise homogenous culture that can be brought about by an overabundance of one way of thinking or style of art can often be tiring, and is the cultural equivalent of inbreeding, as there is no influx of outside styles to diversify the ‘genetics’ of culture, so to speak.

As I write this right now, I’m listening to a mixture of jazz music and traditional

Hebrew music by a band called Hasidic New Wave. It is very rare in other communities to find such cross-pollination of styles of music and art other than

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here in the United States, which was the ‘original’ melting pot of cultures and lifestyles. Well, you can say that. The U.S. used to be just as racist and xenophobic as any other country you could name; however, we appear to have gotten over that.

While on the subject, what purpose do racism and xenophobia serve? Simply to isolate yourself, as if you need an excuse. Racism is a dying practice, and it is very difficult to come across a genuinely racist individual who believes that their race is ‘better’ than all others. They may be possessed of misconceived notions and stereotypes regarding another race, but they are by no means under the impression that the given race is ‘lesser’ because of what they perceive as a peculiarity.

If one does not grow up around a certain race, it is typically very difficult for their customs and ways of living to be understood by those around them. For example, I lived in a fairly white-washed neighborhood while I was growing up and was not exposed heavily to Islam, Hinduism or Buddhism. However, as you can tell, I have overcome my lack of universalist ways of thinking as a child and can now rattle off as much or more as your average adherent to any given religion. The same goes for racism; if a child does not recognize or appreciate the differences between races, it is not an impossible feat to teach them to do so.

It is sometimes this way, anyhow; sometimes because of lack of understanding

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and misconceptions based upon single individuals or small groups, people come to conclusions that are ‘racist.’

The reason that racism continues to exist is simply because people keeping pointing it out and bringing it up. Much like radical Islam is a tiny sector of the

Islamic population, the vast majority of the community of any given race are not

‘rednecks’ or ‘thugs.’ Racism is a dying breed, so let it die out as it should. Stop making race issues out of things that are disagreements between two individuals of different races.

Having said that, it’s back to the point; different races and diversity of cultures in a given area provides an interesting blend of different types of art, speech, and culture in general. For example, the modern-day Mexican culture in most areas is defined by a mixing of Aztec and Spanish cultures, and many of their traditions cannot definitively be traced back to one or the other. While I was at a Mexican flea market a few years back, I found a store that sold religious memorabilia, and they had both Aztec idols and crucifixes, which I found odd. I snagged myself an

Aztec calendar with a golden-painting idol of Huitzilopochtli on it (score!) for twenty dollars at said store.

However, that aside, this type of cultural blending is not too uncommon in many areas across the world. It may serve to cause somewhat discouraging results, such as the corruption of Hinduism by the British imperialism back in the day. It

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can’t all be good, much as one would expect aberrations in a genetic sense given the cross-breeding of two individuals of different races.

During a period of stagnancy, it is often helpful to give a society a healthy injection of new culture, such as injecting Europe with a bit of doubt in religion at the end of the Dark Ages, causing events like the Renaissance. Though, like I said earlier, it can have mixed results. Usually introducing doctrine that requires submission or obedience typically does not bode well for the culture of a society.

Take, for example, the Soviet Union. Much of the Soviet Union’s art and media were focused upon glorifying the state (for fat paychecks from the state), and there was very little ‘free expression’ going on. Until Mikhail Gorbachev’s policy of glasnost, there was only a small trickle of art and media going on outside of the state’s sanction, and as such, the countrymen failed to be motivated to be independent in their own right and the government collapsed once the policy of openness was instituted.

It is through their attempt to restrict their culture and whatever repercussions that may have had that demonstrate exactly what happens when a society attempts to restrict the growth of their culture; when they do, culture stagnates, and stagnation is never a good thing. Change, while a thing that many fear, is a necessity of life and a requirement for a well-balanced individual who is a member of a polite society.

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The cultures of societies follow the same general pattern of the genetics of societies; perhaps that’s why repeated phrases in speech are considered

‘memes,’ much like ‘genes.’ Think of it this way: If a society had but one race of people and those people had no outsiders to breed with, would their society advance as quickly? I say no, simply because the intermingling of people of the same genetic makeup as you can sometimes be not too far off from incest. I observe culture in the same way; there is very little good that can be done by isolationism besides either stagnation or regression.

So, as such, we have great things that come forth, such as the advent of jazz in the United States from the slums of Harlem. I would add rap, but it has been a shadow of its former self these past couple of years. I miss the good old days where Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, Easy E, Tupac and Biggie Smalls were the great artists of the time. Now we have talentless fools who cannot sing or make an original beat, so they use machines to write their music. There’s no feeling anymore. There’s nothing except an urge to pander to the patrons of ‘da club’ in order to gain money and prominence, prominence being gained only in to gain more money in turn.

People wonder why the people call the United States a country of whores. Look at Hollywood. Look at how people have no real desire to create art anymore, anything genuine or moving, they simply desire paychecks to live their lifestyles

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in a ridiculously luxurious manner and provide the same for those they deem worthy. The music industry is going the way of Hollywood.

There’s a conspiracy theory (and a band!) called the Cancer Conspiracy, based upon the principle that the healthcare industry must have found a cure for cancer because of all the hours of research done into it, but everyone has suppressed it because it is more expensive for people to pay for long-term treatment of cancer.

In effect, this just means that they believe the healthcare industry is out for money, without the well-being of patients in mind.

Now, the band The Cancer Conspiracy, as I understand it, is based around the premise that the same thing is true in a cultural sense; “the industry” suppresses any sort of ‘good’ music or cinema and prevents it from reaching the mainstream, because anything good would give people some degree of taste in regards to what they review as good or bad. If they suddenly could understand the difference, they wouldn’t buy or pay for all the crap that is put out there by the dregs of the media and music industry, therefore it can be said they are just in it for the profit.

I find the second theory much more plausible than the first. Believe me, I have done melanoma research as an intern, and I can tell you firsthand that research scientists are some of the most egotistical people I have never met, which I perceive as a good thing for their profession; they take pride in their work. On

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that note, they would never turn down anything with as much prestige as having their name attached to something as massive as a bona fide cure for cancer.

They would be rich beyond their wildest dreams, and not have to work another day in their lives. They would take as many pains as is necessary to get the cure out there and make sure that their name was attached to it and it was implemented just as they discovered so that they may receive such prestige, which is not really such a bad thing in this case; it acts as a countermeasure to such corruption as the first theory.

I must admit that I do not care for most ‘popular’ music these days that is produced by the music industry, and many of the people that I spend my time with are of the same opinion. Perhaps their outlook on things is a symptom of some underlying desire to think past such silliness that makes me desire their company (and vis-à-vis). At the same time, there is still something that is popular produced by the mainstream music industry that is tolerable or emotionally stimulating or some such, not just some song exalting the virtues of fornication, violence or any other such base urge.

Perhaps that is my problem with mainstream culture these days. It rarely ever evokes emotion like it is supposed to, instead it stimulates only base desires, the

“Four F’s:” Fire, fighting, food and fornication. I will spell out what they all mean.

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Fire is taken to mean anything pertinent to luxury, such as fire is not absolutely necessary to the existence of a species (as shown by the fact that we’re the only one that uses it). Even to our race, fire and all other technology is just a device to make our living easier. It is important to remember that; while technological advance is indeed important, it is equally as important to remember that we should not grow so dependent upon it. This refers only to excess luxury, as a little comfort in your life is something to content yourself with. This era is not one of asceticism, nor should it be.

Fighting is the establishment of dominance over your fellow man, be it through combat, mentality or other prideful means. In essence, this is pride characterized in a more hostile sense. Fighting is just a means to prove to another that your life is more worth living than theirs, and in essence is a show of arrogance instead of one of humility as it should be.

Food is a fairly simple thing to explain, it is concerned with survival. However, these days, not all food is something that is necessary to survive. Sometimes food is comfort, sometimes it is something excessively delightful to taste, and sometimes it is just a pastime. When taken to such extremes, anything that is required for survival is assuredly bad for you, both in physical and mental aspects, as is the depravation of said things. Excess in consumption of food leads to obesity (not just overweight, actual obesity) and depravation of food causes anorexia and death. Both are undesirable outcomes and shorten your life

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significantly. We must maintain balance between the two, lest we become something that self-destructs.

Fornication, once again, is a relatively simple thing. It is based off of the principle that we need only pleasure ourselves and flatter our own ego (that’s the only reason to be good at pleasuring your partner to some people), followed closely by the idea that some of us must reproduce, or so we think. I never quite understood this idea. Sure, reproduction and continuing your line is a great thing, but it is by no means necessary. It is a base thing, a simple thing, a substitute for actual happiness is to feel physical sensations that amount to pleasure.

Let me tell you something; I have had a full-body orgasm and experienced brain- frying pleasure before. However, is it something that I would seek again? No. It is something that was special to me, and I would prefer it stay that way. That is not saying I do not seek to pleasure my partners when I practice intercourse, but I am certainly not in it for my own selfish ends and saying “to hell with my partners.” I live to serve in whatever manner I can, after all.

As much as it has been watered down in recent years by hyper-production and advocation by the media, the fact still remains that sex is a bonding experience between two consenting adults1. It is, despite what anyone may tell you or think,

1 I say ‘adults’ here because I do not advocate statutory rape. This is also a relative term across the world; I believe the ages of accountability in terms of adulthood also coincide with the ages of sexual legality in most countries. In the U.S., we use the phrase “Old enough to smoke, old enough to poke.” I think there’s also one about voting, which seems more applicable.

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an emotional experience, as your brain will form synaptic connections to cause you to think of your partner in a better light. Well, unless you’re blackout drunk.

Then you experience little to no neural bonding with your partner.

I never really understood the mentality behind meaningless hookups. I have been propositioned many-a-time for a hookup outside of a committed relationship, but I have turned them down every time. What’s the point if there’s no emotional connection? Oh wait, there is! People just deny it. That’s why they go back to the same person (or the same type of person) over and over again. However, not every sexual act is one without consequences, and as such we have unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases. I’m also not counting property damage from people going psycho after you inform them it was ‘just a one night thing.’

But, anyways, I have a cure for all STD’s! I can guarantee that all venereal disease will be gone in a generation if we follow my plan.

It’s called “keep your dick to yourself.” Without such promiscuity, sexually transmitted diseases would be no huge matter. The reason that the AIDS virus has spread so rapidly is that people have no sense of peace anymore in the vein that they cannot attain it themselves, they have to find comfort in the arms (and genitals) of a stranger, and as such disease spreads like… well, a virus. There is

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another way, finding peace besides those brief moments of orgasm and post- coitus.

That’s not to say that sex doesn’t have a time and a place. If you are certain you are not diseased and you are in a truly committed relationship (this means it has lasted at least a month, you damn kids these days), then it is less likely that any sort of mishap will occur involving hurt feelings. I mean, unwanted pregnancy is still always there, but it’s always a threat unless you get a vasectomy (which is a very simple procedure and, if asked for, can be reversed in most cases) or a hysterectomy (a much harder and irreversible procedure).

Even if you are diseased, it would be more advisable to wait until you have some sort of real commitment besides saying “I love you” (such as a marriage) before fornicating with your partner and spreading your disease. If you maintain a committed relationship and do not end up inadvertently spreading it to your children, then the world would be free of sexually transmitted diseases within a generation.

However, not everyone thinks this way. I had a rather disturbing conversation with a child (fifteen, still a child by my standards) who stated that if he received an incurable disease, he would spread it as much as he could simply to alleviate his own feelings of inferiority. In a sense, he would take everyone else down to his level. This sentiment horrifies me. This type of mentality will lead to the doom

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of our race. This is equivalent to breaking quarantine of a deadly and contagious disease just because you “Feel like other people should know what you’re going through” (in the case of AIDS and syphilis).

On the note of syphilis, there are several STDs that can be cured by administering of antibiotics, such as the obvious syphilis, gonorrhea (the ‘clap’) and chlamydia, to name a few. The cure for these is a simple course of antibiotics (and finish your entire course or it may come back), and you’ll be perked up and disease-free in no time! Well, relatively. Just because you’re not currently diseased doesn’t give you free reign to go and screw your brains out.

That’s how you got the disease in the first place, eh? Once you have the sensation of peeing molten lava all the way down your urethra when you catch gonorrhea and pus exudes from your genitals, you may think twice about the hookup culture.

And here we get back on topic; this is what I see wrong with culture. It extols things that are unhealthy and immoral. It is a simple play to the selfishness of the individual, and in many cases, the mass media actually panders to the counter- culture (such as in the case of media giant Viacom). But, culture is a much larger problem that manifests itself more severely in what we would consider “polite” society.

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VI:V- Perspectives on Society

“It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”

–Jiddu Krishnamurti

It cannot be argued that society is a peachy thing and everything is just fine as it is. Well, I guess it can be with a thoroughly stupid individual, but then again, you can argue the existence of unicorns in reality with a stupid individual.

As I addressed in the last section, much of what we have twisted to be considered ‘virtues’ in this day in age are actually harmful to us. Sexual promiscuity is but one example; more include excessive pride, dependence on technology, excessive need for socialization, desensitization towards the plight of others… I could go on. As the quote above says, our society is indeed

“profoundly sick.”

But, what solution do I offer to this? Simple. Seek peace, and you will find that all of these things go away rather quickly. It works both ways; you will find peace by disposing of these things, and by finding peace you will have no further need of these things.

Admittedly, technology is a useful tool, but what happened to a phone call? Why do we have to ‘text’ each other every time we need something? I understand that

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not everyone can take a phone call at a given moment, but there’s this thing called ‘returning calls’ that seems to be a lost art. Or, you know, if you’re in walking distance, you could just go say hi… or you could use the internet. Or, better yet, you could just see the person you’re communicating with in person so you don’t have to use such depersonalized means of communication to speak to each other!

What I find odd is that people play like they don’t get your texts, phone calls, or play like they don’t see your Facebook status updates when you know they read everyone’s… so on and so forth. Let me make this very clear: your playing hard to get does not get you anywhere. All it does is irritate the person that is trying to speak to you. A couple of minutes to respond to a message? Sure, that’s fine. A couple of hours or a day? That is not acceptable. Unless you offer an apology or a reason for not returning correspondence, there is no reason at all for your communication to continue. Sometimes with less reliable means of communication (i.e. sending messages through Facebook, Skype or any number of other programs that allow chatting when the other person is not capable of receiving them at the moment) it is acceptable to not respond for extended periods of time, but I make it a point to respond to communication as soon as possible when I receive it (if it warrants a response, that is).

However, while I do use technology quite frequently (as I am now, typing this), I would like to think that I am by no means dependent to it. Technology is a tool,

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not something that you should let guide your life. Unfortunately, basic functionality in this day and age is something that semi-requires the use of this tool. Were I capable of spreading my word at the same rate without using all of this technology, I most certainly would. However, in this day and age, technology seems to be a must for communication on a broad scale. I’d rather live like

Buddha Gautama or Zarathustra, wandering about from place to place, teaching to all those who would listen. I suppose worldwide distribution ain’t bad, though.

Technology has become a crutch for most people, filling in the gaps where genuine socialization and personality used to fit in. Now we’ve become a hollow series of jokes we’ve seen on the internet and articles we’ve read on Reddit.

Who are we anymore? Shells of our former selves, before we became enslaved of our own free will to this technology. The technology itself is not an abomination; far from it, as I have already said, as technology is useful tool.

People do not seem to remember how to function without their technology.

Granted, I’m not much of one for hunting my own food because I lack atlatl or a bow and arrow of some sort, but the principle of the matter is fine with me. I would be perfectly content to live in the wilderness and catch my own meals, provided I had the means at my disposal to do so. Were I not so interested in teaching the masses, I would live at the top of a mountain in Nepal in a shack, growing my own food and occasionally coming down to hunt for some

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indulgence. While I am still perfectly content with the way things are, it would by no means disquiet me to go back to the old ways of doing things.

Many people do not share this mentality. Many people are possessed of the notion that you do not need interpersonal connections when you have virtual connections to people you’ve never met in person, and appreciate them as much as they do their real friends. Hell, on Facebook, it’s not uncommon to see a person with more than a thousand friends, many of whom we can assume the person in question never even met. An observation I have made is that the number of friends a person has is general inversely proportional to their level of happiness, unless extenuating circumstances occur (if you actually do know all those people and find it interesting to keep up with them), which is a very rare thing with people with more than three hundred to four hundred friends on this site.

Yet, for the most part, all it remains as is a time-waster. I’ve reconnected with a few individuals by using the site, but it was by no means something I could not have done without it. I do not meet new friends using it, and as to my knowledge people rarely do, unless you’re one of those people who considers what

Facebook calls “friends” actual friends, in which case you are severely misguided. But this is nothing new to most of my reading audience.

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This is but one example of how we’ve decayed; the internet has provided another time waster for us, another one where we can hone our pseudo-socialization skills that do not actually translate into real life. So, in essence, the vast majority of what you do on the internet actually is a time waster. Like all technology, it has its uses, but for the most part we have let it consume us and enslave us. We have become helpless before it. We were taught by the generations before us to depend upon technology, and we have only become more and more dependent upon it, ever since the metaphorical Prometheus brought down fire from Mount

Olympus. These things are tools for us; we are not slaves to them.

Enough of repeating the same idea ad nauseum. I assume that at this point, everyone has read and understood the message that “people are supposed to use technology, not let it control them.” These trappings that have severely clouded our minds are sadly but one aspect of what is wrong with society. Well, so far we’ve covered:

1. Frequent and casual sex with differing individuals has caused a decay in

society, as well as the spread of disease

2. The dumbing-down of the public by the various industries of

‘entertainment’ has caused a decay in society

3. The constant use and subsequent dependency on technology has caused

a decay in society

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There is still much to cover, however. Right now I’d like to discuss how our culture has become excessively self-centered and it has bled over into our various breeds of socialization, causing some individuals to barely be able to tolerate being alone. I knew one such individual who clung to me like a barnacle, even though she had no desire to listen to what I said, only to garner herself more attention, which I knew would have disastrous results for both of us if I pandered to what she perceived as her ‘need for attention.’ Let’s call her

“Kaylee.”

When I met Kaylee, she was apparently immediately infatuated with me because of my voice (it is very deep and booming), and after a while of not seeing one another, she told all of my friends that she wanted to marry me. I, not being there at the moment, was of the opinion that there was some truth to this statement, so

I kept my distance, and rightfully so. Kaylee had a case of Histrionic Personality

Disorder1, and would do anything for attention. She even had a case of ‘epilepsy’ which caused her to have ‘petit mal seizures’ which would be broken by waving your hand in front of her face. Take it from an epileptic who has had several petit mal seizures- it doesn’t work like that.

Regardless of one tiny aspect of her attention whoring, she was absolutely incapable of spending any time alone. She would go out with friends who were doing things and do homework simply because she couldn’t stand not being paid

1 She refused to go to a psychiatrist and get an actual diagnosis, so my “Psychology textbook” diagnosis is apparently about as close as it comes to an accurate one. Still, looking at the symptoms, I find it hard to not be convinced.

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attention to. To a diagnosable degree, this occurs in 1.84% of the population (of the U.S., I assume, as my source did not specify a country), which totals out at nearly six-million people in the United States (given current population is around three-hundred million). While it is certainly disheartening to know that so many individuals who will do anything for attention are in any given community, it is also important to remember that it is but a personality disorder, and a cure is a relatively simple thing; correct their behavior rationally and without cruelty. Teach them that it’s not always about them, that there’s nothing wrong with being alone, so on and so forth.

Kaylee in particular characterized to an extreme many of the things I perceive as wrong with this society; she lied through her teeth at any given moment for something as she perceived as ‘worthwhile’ at that moment, never thinking ahead and realizing that honesty is usually a better path to take. One example of a bald-faced lie that she told me with a complete and utter seriousness was that she was a devout Christian and was going to wait until marriage to have sex. She left out that she had sex earlier that week with a boy she had just been dating for a short while, and furthermore that it was sodomy. She also perceived me as a potential mate, which was not an idea I entertained at any point of knowing her, as I have a very keen eye for noticing when something is ‘off’ about an individual.

She entertained this idea while she was dating the aforementioned fellow, and she was so kind as to follow me back to my room one night to view my Aztec calendar. As she stood there in my room, staring at me with fully dilated pupils,

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and I recognized a few more of the tell-tale signs of arousal in her, I looked her straight in the eyes and said: “I’m schizophrenic.” I watched her desire flee out of her body immediately. It was great, in a sort of cosmically humorous way. I dodged a big bullet with just two words.

I still stay in contact with her, and I’m certain she’ll find her mention in here

‘flattering’ as I did not use her actual name, and only a handful of individuals will even know who I’m talking about. I only even care to rehash those memories as to bring out the ideas that I perceive as ‘wrong’ with society. It’s not about these things. It’s not about lying to people to make them think you’re better than you are, because quite frankly no matter what you do, you will never be objectively

‘better’ than anyone else. The sooner you get that through your head, the better.

No matter how many virtues or faults you possess, you are still human- no more, no less.

I could go ahead and list the various personality faults I have perceived in my travels across various cities, states, and countries, but that would be pointless, as across pretty much any given populace the faults are the same. Their pride blinds them; they believe that they are better than another given population. In personal levels, people believe themselves to be above other people, so on and so forth.

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I’m not entirely certain where certain types of bitterness come from. There are a handful of African-Americans who demand reparation from the government for slavery, and I’m not possessed of a proper understanding of what gives them the right to demand such a thing. After all, they were not ‘caught in the jungles of

Africa’ as many people think; they were sold. They were sold by their fellow

Africans to the Americans as slaves. Were they not used by the Americans,

Spanish or many other slaving colonies, they would be used by their fellow

Africans.

I do not recall any Hebrew having the gall to ask the Persians for reparations for their enslavement in their country, nor the Egyptians. Why? Because that is the past. An apology is a nice thing to make amends, but monetary compensation is by no means required. An apology, so long as it is purely and truly genuine, is more valuable than any half-assed apology and compensation. Sweetening the deal with material goods is but a politeness. Governments are not known for their politeness, so once again I return to the question of why it is that people think the government will give them anything. I guess it’s one of those “Yell enough and people will give you attention” situations. Hey, I had a friend like that once. Her name was Kaylee, and…

Just kidding, I’m not going back into that again. But seriously, on a semi-related note, where do people get the idea that the government ‘owes’ them anything?

Paying taxes is a gip, I’m afraid to tell you, and you’re highly unlikely to see a

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reasonable percentage paid back to you. The government ‘owes’ you jack, and that’s likely what you’ll get from them if you ask.

Now, somebody has to take care of the disabled. That we can agree upon. But a lot of people have these things called ‘friends,’ ‘family,’ and ‘charities’ that they can call upon for help. I am not entirely certain why we are unwillingly paying money out of our pockets to the government to have them filter in back to people who are most likely not in need of it because of one of the above mentioned factors, but use it to supplement their income. After all, how will you justify your existence above someone else’s if you don’t make more than they do?

The same goes for welfare. Welfare is a charade of fairness that the Democratic1 party does to garner votes from the lower class and those dependent on welfare.

The reason it exists is because of political games, I am sad to say. The way it has been implemented is horrendous, as well. If you have no recorded income beyond a certain amount, you are eligible for welfare. However, not everyone records their income with the government, such as people who live through selling things on eBay, or much more commonly, dealers of illegal drugs. If you see someone roll up to the welfare office in a pimped-out car with gold chains and new shoes, it’s very likely that you can guess their profession just based upon that.

1 Not to say that I dislike the democrats any more than the republicans; I find them both equally without merit. The Democrats may pander to the lower class and minorities, but the Republicans pander to the upper-middle classes and religious majority.

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Much like the disabled, those who are welfare should ideally depend upon those around them and charities. However, due to the fact that the government pretty much runs like a charity in terms of the lower class (and a thief to the upper class), they really perceive no need for things to change. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a fan of the silliness known as “Reaganomics,” but at the same time redistributing wealth is by no means something that the government should have the power of doing. I’m more in favor of a flat tax and the greatly diminished spending of the government.

Some people call welfare ‘sticking it to the man.’ Oh, you’re living in squalor and living off of the buck of some rich dude who actually works for a living, likely some tiny pittance of what you could be making if you got a job related to your skills and/or interest. Or, you know, got a grant and went to school and got an education. Good for you, just sitting there watching re-runs on TV all day until you can quote them by memory.

A lot of people argue that some folks are just on welfare for a while, and it would hurt them if the system were to be abolished. Well, there’s this thing called

‘charity’ that you can call upon if you’re in a temporarily desperate measure. In all likeliness, this is something that could be taken care of by friends and family, as well.

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My father told me an interesting story a while ago about charity. He volunteers at the local church on occasion, building homes and providing other such know-how as he used to be a construction worker and also a carpenter. One job came up where they were helping a little old lady rebuild her house because she was unable to do so due to both her physical and financial situation. So, you may be asking, what is the point of this story?

Well, the lady had several kids. This lady was elderly and her children were in their mid-to-late 20s, and they happened to roll up while the construction crew was re-doing her house. You know what they did? They sat there and watched, even though they were perfectly capable of doing the handiwork themselves, or at least being of some help to the charity workers. If I recall the way my father told this story, they sat there and drank water which they had in abundance, but did not even offer to the workers. That’s real class, right there. Mama raised her kids right.

That is the problem. The order of things you should depend on other people for goes in this order: Family, friends, then charity. If absolutely nobody else is capable of helping you out of your situation, then it is acceptable to use the services provided by those kind enough to donate to charities, but don’t be like the family who took advantage of a charity when they were perfectly capable of doing it themselves. That’s borderline fraud, and if you have any shred of a conscience, you should (a) not do it, but at the very least (b) feel bad.

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So, while we’re discussing sociopaths, let’s get on the broad topic: Why is sociopathy so destructive to society? Simple; it is a concentrated example of selfishness. As in any case where selfishness outweighs selflessness, sociopathy rarely ever has any marked benefit to society besides what is taken from the sociopathic.

Sociopaths are typically very dangerous individuals, if for no reason other than they will do anything and everything in their power to achieve their goals, and more often than not that idea involves throwing others to the dogs for them to attain whatever goal they may have in mind. Still, there is something to be said for sociopaths; they understand human potential perfectly. You are capable of anything that you set your mind to, and in some regards I could be considered a sociopath as I adhere to that philosophy. However, I would like to think that my philosophy is of a much more selfless nature than the typical “Screw you, I got what I wanted.” The word ‘sociopath’ has a very negative connotation in English, but there are exceptions to every rule. Those who cast aside the old ways in order of implementing their own would likely be considered sociopaths in their respective societies. We could go so far as to say anyone that has ever changed the way that humanity as a whole thought was sociopathic to some degree, as they saw that the way that things are currently is not how they need be forever.

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That is the mentality that I enjoy the most in an individual- a desire to change the world around them. Most people are content simply to exist, simply to etch out a living for themselves and try to prove themselves better than those around them by their various means of boastfulness. However, when people think that they are a part of a cause without actually doing anything1, that disappoints me that people could be suckered in so easily and made them feel like they were

‘helping’ when they were just pressing a button or giving money to a corporation that might help some cause.

While on the subject of people who think they are doing something but they’re not, I’ve actually got a few friends who genuinely believe that they’re going to change the world through… well, doing nothing, really. I wouldn’t be surprised to see that they thought they were the Second Coming or something like that.

People are so convinced of their little delusions and they cannot see past them using logic, reason, or otherwise means to analyze their insanity. This disappoints me even further, as I have had to do this to an extreme, being the schizophrenic individual that I am. The basic amount of effort I have to go through to even write to a point where you can understand me is completely incomprehensible to modern folk because everything has been made so easy in life at this point for your average person that they do not know what ‘struggle’ is.

I’m sure they think they do, but studying all night for a college algebra test is not

‘struggling.’ It is the bare minimum.

1 See the Invisible Children “Kony 2012” campaign.

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In short, this is what I find wrong with society. People are possessed of so many illusions of superiority and delusions of grandeur that they believe themselves to be ‘enlightened,’ while everyone else around them is but a sheep in a flock who they know better than. Here’s the thing- if you have such a mentality, you’re one of the sheep, too.

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VI:VI- Miscellanea

VI:VI:I- Health

“The first wealth is health.”

–Ralph Waldo Emerson

Health is something that is a measure of well-being in a variety of manners; it can be applied to individuals, masses, or entire societies as a measure of general well-being. In an individual, it is maintaining homeostasis- a balance between the various functions of the body, the minerals contained therewithin, and a whole slew of other things that will cause problems if they grow out of check. The same thing can be said of the masses and society as a whole as well; there is a delicate balance between the way things are, and if they are upset, society may very well collapse, riots may occur, pandemics may occur, mass starvation… so on and so forth.

Society is a sick beast, as I established in the last section. I believe that it is curable, though, and I’d like to believe I can be a part of the cure. Think of me as a dose of penicillin to an infected world. I only hope this disease is not methicillin- resistant.

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VI:VI:I:I- Mental Health

“Knowing that you’re crazy doesn’t make the crazy things stop happening.”

–Mark Vonnegut

Mental health is a degree of adjustment to society. As the quote says at the beginning of the section on society, it may be considered insanity to be adjusted so well to such a profoundly sick society. Certain types of insanity could actually be considered good things- an individual who sees past the lies of the age would likely be perceived as ‘insane’ given modern definitions of the word, especially if he is not particularly keen on hiding his knowledge of such things.

But, back on subject, what is an actual mental disease? Once again, the answer is something relatively simple. Much like all religion is descended from the

Urreligion, all mental illness is descended from schizophrenia1. Schizophrenia is the end-all and be-all of mental illness, and pretty much any symptom of any other mental disorder can be commonly found in schizophrenic individuals.

Schizophrenia is special, though, and even if you had some insane type of personality disorders, depression, and bi-polar disorder all at once, you would still not be classified as schizophrenic because you are still somewhat in touch with reality. Schizophrenics see and hear things; the common man does not.

1 A common misconception is that schizophrenia is, in fact, multiple personality disorder. I do not know where this idea comes from, but it is about as far from true as possible. Maybe it is the mood swings? Schizophrenics are typically of a dissociative nature, not so much one of confusion as to personal identity; think of it as a ‘lack of,’ not a ‘confusion about.’

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For me, these things were commonly voices, clicking and whirring of machinery, and the sounds of birds at night, for whatever reason. Also common but considerably less disconcerting was looking at the walls of ceilings and seeing them ‘swimming,’ and other series of spatial distortions that simply made me shrug and continue on with my business. However, hearing a voice screaming at you to do bad things and kill yourself is considerably more jarring and difficult to deal with. While not an advisable course of action by any means, taking the mushrooms helped my schizophrenia greatly; where I originally had just one voice telling me I was worthless, garbage, didn’t deserve to live and that I should just kill myself, he ‘split’ into three voices; one like he used to be, but quieter, one who was actually nice to me and the two would actually occupy most of their time arguing with the other. The third voice was one that simply commented on my actions and was helpful from time to time in pointing out things that I thought I hadn’t noticed but subconsciously had, apparently.

It really wasn’t a bad deal for about three years there, and I was feeling pretty good about it. I developed a bit of a ‘god complex,’ though, and I believed I was better than everyone else and they were but playthings for me to manipulate by any means necessary (sociopathic behavior, in other words). Then the shit hit the fan.

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I did not sleep well the entire year I was nineteen, and I had pretty much entirely stopped writing the book (which was a good thing, I’ve had to edit out some of those sections because I was so severely delusional), and I’d sleep an average of four hours a night because of whatever reason. I’d stay up all night and sleep odd hours some days, and one day I woke up from a sleep session/nap and I felt very odd and disconnected. My voices were gone, replaced with a great deal of laughter. I asked them “What’s so funny?” and they replied in turn with “Oh, you’ll find out.” Find out I did, as I started convulsing about five minutes later. This wasn’t a seizure as to my knowledge, as I was conscious for the entire thing, but the convulsions sure as hell weren’t anything I could control with my conscious mind. Immediately, I laid down as my legs were starting to twitch as well, and I stared up at the ceiling.

The ceiling began to twist and warp, as well as the walls, and after a few short seconds they exploded out into nothingness. I heard laughter as if I were in an arena and every patron found something I was doing as absolutely hilarious, and

I felt stabbing pains in various parts of my body every few seconds. Every time I would get ‘stabbed,’ the audience would roar with laughter. At this point, I had completely been overcome by fear, and was stomping around (in my hallucination, I was paralyzed in waking life, minus convulsing and apparently crying) asking for help, for somebody, anybody, to come and help me. Nobody did, and a massive demon that was invisible to me came forth and said in his evil and booming voice (which I recognize now as the voice of the Plagued One),

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“Nobody is coming to help you. You are my plaything. Get used to it.” I then felt the ground give out beneath me and I had the sensation of falling, still getting stabbed every couple of seconds, and I fell into something that felt burning hot and caused me a good bit of pain. Then… it all stopped. All of it. I was in a void, no pain, no voice, no laughter, no nothing. While I was relieved for the first few seconds, there was no real “peace” about it, as I sensed it was all about to resume at any given moment. The dread overcame me, and I began to stumble around, looking for a way out, asking for someone to show me the way. That, my reader, was actually the worst part. The entire hallucination probably lasted all of thirty minutes, but it felt like days upon days. Especially the part where I was lost; there was nothing. There was nothingness, and only nothingness.

This was nothing like the hallucinations that I had while the evil voice was speaking to me, as he had never been so deep and cutting in a way words cannot describe. Also, he had never made me feel such intense physical pain that I have yet to even come close to anything comparable before or since.

I felt sore all over after I came to, and I discovered that I was still twitching.

Naturally, I stayed in my room the next day, thinking that it would all kind of ‘blow over’ pretty quickly. It didn’t, I was still twitching the next day, so I sought psychiatric help. They told me that this was highly unusual, but I was beyond a shadow of a doubt schizophrenic, so I was prescribed Seroquel and sent home to sort through it, instructed to take a pill every night for a week. Take them I did,

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but I had a bad reaction to the Seroquel and as a side-effect it made me sleep approximately 12-15 hours a day, which is quite a bit after you’ve gone from four hours a night to that.

After the week was up and I had run out of medicine, I found out I couldn’t hear anything. There were no voices. I had stopped twitching. I felt chilled-out, and everything just sort of fell into place. I finally understood what my place was in everything, I looked in the mirror and I actually felt like I was the person in the mirror that was looking at me. It all made sense.

That feeling still hasn’t gone away.

I’ve been on medicine ever since about six months after that just as a precautionary measure (don’t want it coming back, after all), a much less harsh anti-psychotic named Abilify. I’ve been entertaining myself with trivialities ever since then, such as school and work, but my focus has always been this book.

I’ve been writing on it in short bursts (and removing some of the more neurotic and silly sections), but only in the final week of the writing have I actually buckled down and begun writing more than eight hours a day on it, on average. When you work this much on a single thing, you begin to have an intricate understanding of it, and I think I have reached that point of seeing both the beginning and the end of these things.

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But that’s enough about me. Back to the generalities of mental health, my example aside, we can still be assured that all mental diseases and neurosis are descended from schizophrenia. How and why, you ask? Well, I would ask you in return: What is it that makes humans different than all other animals? It is simple; we can give coherent form to our thoughts and communicate them effectively, and we have higher thought processes that are capable of analyzing events around us and subsequently causing reflections of said events within ourselves.

Given that we are descended from chimpanzees (not apes, as is the misconception), we can say with relative assuredness that what makes humans different than chimpanzees (aside from a few relatively minor physical characteristics in the grand scope of things), is that we are capable of ‘higher thought’ in terms of collaboration and seeing patterns. In that sense, we are nothing more than schizophrenic chimpanzees.

So, given the Prime Order, we can see that the purpose of schizophrenia was originally an evolutionary step necessary for humans to evolve to become sentient and self-aware. This is not an absolute necessity; tame gorillas (such as the famous Koko) can be taught to communicate through sign language and, in essence, become self-aware, but that is through teaching, not through nature.

So, in this vein, we can see schizophrenia as an ‘evolutionary remnant,’ something that was once necessary for higher thought but is no longer a

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necessity, and as such is an aberration in evolution, much like an appendix, a resultant ‘vestigial mental condition.’

Well, you can argue that all you want, but there’s just as much evidence to the point that we still do have uses for schizophrenia and neurotic individuals. As any given individual is as prone to neurosis as the next fellow, we can see that the remnants of schizophrenia are indeed still present in modern day society and have not been eliminated by the unending march of evolution. So, then, it can be argued that schizophrenia has just as much use in the common day as it did way back when we were still evolving from primates.

Are schizophrenia and all other mental illness still not of use? As I point out several times earlier in the book, many schizophrenic and otherwise mentally diseased individuals have actually been great men and accomplished great things that allow us to lead our lives in the manner to which we’ve become accustomed. In a sense, the neurotic knows better how to tell people how to live their lives in a moral and upstanding sense than a sane man does. It’s called

‘seeing things from the other side,’ to use an idiom.

Now, all that nastiness aside, how is a mentally unstable individual supposed to co-exist with the normal folk in society? Well, medicine helps, but there are also tricks such as meditation, therapy, and just plain developing friendships with people like you. You’ll find that when you have people to discuss things with who

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have similar thoughts and feelings that common life becomes infinitely more bearable.

Take, for example, myself. I had no idea for about a year that some people had the same nightmarish experience that I described earlier in this section.

However, a friend of mine (the vehement atheist) told me that he had a very similar series of dreams that almost mimicked it perfectly. That, he told me, is one of the reasons that he lost his faith. Well, that, and yours truly. Being appealed to by both the logos and pathos is a hard thing to deny. It helped me understand exactly what had happened, and I assume the same for him.

Yet another personal example; another friend of mine had been hearing a voice for a couple of years (which she only mentioned one instance to me; I thought it was a panic attack) and it only came to light after she had been drunk for three days straight and she said the voice was screaming at her, and we determined that she was schizophrenic (hallucinations being a hallmark of schizophrenia) and should seek help. In the meantime, I helped her through her situation as I recalled what it was like in the year before I took the mushrooms when I only heard one voice and it told me to do bad things to people and tear them down mentally and emotionally. She was in a similar state; she had the most actualized capacity for bitchiness that I’ve ever seen in an individual, yet she was not unpleasant to be around. Quite the contrary, she was very nice, fun and

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altogether enjoyable to be around when not in that mood, which only cropped up when she was around particularly intolerable individuals.

I do not blame her; my capacity for malice has always been something beyond what most individuals can conceive of simply because they do not see how the patterns in individual and mass behavior work like I do, and it is a relatively easy thing to notice these things in an individual, point them out and make them seem like they are inferior because of them. Granted, I have never actually used my full potential, but the thoughts have certainly abounded before. Then again, that was before I found myself with an overwhelming sense of inner peace. Now nothing bothers me. I may as well be completely psychiatrically normal at this point, though I still am aware of and completely still in touch with my psychotic side. I know it exists, but at this point it has become no chore to suppress. There is really no downside to not acting crazy all the time, contrary to what a few of your friends might thing that are just so obsessed with being perceived as ‘weird’ or

‘off-beat.’ It makes me chuckle to think that people want that label placed on them. Those who actually are severely neurotic usually would like to do without that label.

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VI:VI:I:II- Physical Health

“To get rich never risk your health. For it is the truth that health is the wealth of

wealth.”

–Richard Baker

While I may have a ridiculous immune system and rarely even catch the smallest disease, I am also a heavy smoker1 and anorexic by the loosest definition of the word. It may be hypocritical for me to lecture on health, but only slightly. I am, by most definitions of the word, still a healthy individual.

As was mentioned in the general health section, health is a balance in the human body known as homeostasis. When homeostasis becomes upset by many causes such as malnutrition, sickness, allergies, ingestion of poisonous/intoxicating chemicals and other such things, ill or odd effects may occur.

Malnutrition is one that typically results from a select few causes: starvation, anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, poor lifestyle choices, lack of capacity to eat

(after jaw surgery, for example) and paranoid delusions of people poisoning your food. Well, I’ve been there and done the last two, but the others I cannot give accurate firsthand accounts of. Come to think of it, hardly anyone I know has

1 Here I am, pointing the finger at Jesus for smoking so much opium. Well, I guess tobacco isn’t a heavily mind-altering substance. Still, guess I’m kind of a hypocrite, huh?

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come out to me as an anorexic and/or bulimic. In terms of what may be perceived as my anorexia, it is simply because I barely feel hunger or thirst, if at all. I wouldn’t really call that a ‘good thing,’ but I still get all my essential food groups in a day, so it’s not really a problem. Well, if I can; if I overeat, my stomach’s reaction is to cause intense nausea for about an hour, ending with me tossing up my whole meal anyways. Therefore, moderation is a good idea, as with typically everything.

Sickness is one thing I could lecture on for hours and hours, due to an excellent

Microbiology professor who taught me the ins-and-outs of the immune system.

Some people are not gifted with as active an immune system as myself, and as such suffer more illness and greater effects from intoxicating chemicals (yes, that’s right, the stronger your immune system, the more quickly you will adjust to things that your body perceives as ‘poison’). As such, people’s immunities to diseases (that cannot be vaccinated against, such as tuberculosis or pneumonia) varies greatly. Now, vaccinations can be used to stave off diseases such as measles, mumps, smallpox and rubella, but many vaccinations that were once commonplace are no longer in use simply because the diseases have been exterminated, such as polio.

Smallpox is a disease that is feared for its potential as a pandemic; it has been exterminated the world round, but is still synthesized and used for testing in labs, and if a sample got out, then a bioterrorist could find some distribution method for

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it that would prove lethal to much of the population due to our lack of immunity from it or anything like it. The fatality rate for smallpox is approximately fifty percent without treatment, and the treatment is of limited use, as smallpox is a virus. Viruses cannot be treated as effectively as your garden-variety infection

(with anti-biotics), so this makes smallpox distinctively more dangerous than even the Black Death. The Black Death (bubonic plague) is actually a bacterium and responds fairly well to even the weaker-grade of methicillin antibiotics, and as such has not developed much of a threat like Staph Aureus.

Staph Aureus is the “SA” in “MRSA1,” which is commonly supposed to be a flesh- eating bacteria. Not quite, as not all strains of Staph Aureus are flesh eating, but even some of them that are not Methicillin Resistant (“MR” in “MRSA”) can produce a flesh-eating variant. One such strain is called necrotizing fasciitis (NF), and ranks a ten on the pain scale. The pain from NF is extremely intense, and will likely cause you to scream if you so much as touch an infected area. The treatment for NF is surgery to remove all infected areas of the skin so as to stop spreading, otherwise the infected individual will assuredly die.

Now, tangential fear-mongering aside, the important of keeping a health immune system should be quite clear at this point as to avoid (a) agony and (b) death.

You can’t always count on the medical system to have a treatment for everything, and even so, if you can power through a disease without causing severe

1 All MRSA is Staph Aureus, but not all Staph Aureus is MRSA. In effect, that means that methicillin-based antibiotics can be used to treat many strains of Staph Aureus, just not MRSA.

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complications to yourself or spread it to those around you, more power to you.

We over-prescribe antibiotics and other treatments as it is, and as such the microbes have begun to adapt to overcome these treatments which may well be unnecessary in the first place. However, if I could give you one piece of advice regarding your immunity, it is this: Take the entire course of your medicine prescribed to you. Your doctor didn’t go to college for eight years for nothing, and they know what they’re doing. The reason for this is that while the drugs may minimize the effects of the microbe in question, it is still up to your immune system to deliver the killing blow to the foreign microbe. If you stop your medicine before your immune system is able to finish off the remainder, it is possible that the badass (i.e. drug resistant) microbes will be left, multiply, and cause the problem to start all over again, and even spread to other people. So, for your own sake and the sake of everyone around you, finish your full course of medicine.

It’s for your own good.

Now, if you are given pain medicine, that’s a different story. You don’t necessarily need to finish that, but some advice I’ll give you on this matter is to take the medicine when the first sign of pain shows up. It takes much higher doses to control more advanced pain than when it just begins rearing up. Also, you go through less pain, so why not?

Anyhow, back on subject, I know all about allergies. You know you’re allergic when you’re taking the allergy prick-test on your back and the doctor calls all the

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nurses in to look at you and says “Look closely. This is a case of severe allergies.” Gee, thanks, doc.

Allergies are caused by a misdirection of the immune system to thinking that certain things are in fact invading bodies, even though it could be something as harmless as pollen and you’re just taking a whiff. Under severe allergic cases, death can occur through swelling shut of the throat. This is usually food-based allergies that cause this sort of reaction, but I’ve heard it happen with something so benign-seeming as cat hair. Allergies are a big, long and complicated thing that I will not go into, but suffice it to say that typically allergies persist if you do not get treatment for them (either OTC or therapy) and new allergies can crop up over your lifetime.

Up next we have the fun one- poison and intoxicating chemicals. Intoxicating chemicals (THC, alcohol, DMT analogues that cause hallucination, etcetera) are actually poisons. Well, that depends upon your definition of ‘poison,’ but your body treats them as poisons, which is why they have the effect that they do. A little intoxicating beverage or smoke is fine every once in a while, perhaps even a few to relax or at a party, but getting blackout drunk or so blazed off your ass on a daily basis is not a healthy way of living your life. I drink, I will admit. I do not drink heavily, nor do I drink often, but I still enjoy having a beer or a mixed drink every now and again. I also smoke (tobacco) like a fiend for a variety of reasons, and you can be assured that addiction is not one of them, as I quit for a month

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with no ill effects whatsoever after getting surgery on my jaw. I honestly did not think about it or want to do it whatsoever until I felt healthy again… then I started smoking and feeling less healthy. I guess I’m just finding that good balance. At least, that’s what I tell myself.

So long as intoxicating chemicals are done in a safe environment and in moderation, I see no reason why they should be illegal or really regulated at all. I would advise against the use of heroin, methamphetamines or anything of the like simply because the possible pleasure is way outweighed by the risks (as is the way with many drugs, alcohol and marijuana being first and foremost among the safe ones, relatively speaking). However, if you choose to abstain from intoxicating chemicals, that is just as well. While they may grant a different perspective for the time being, it would be just as simple to attempt to emulate such behavior and pick up on the perceptions that you would be having were you actually intoxicated.

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VI:VI:II- Nature

“Every creature is better alive than dead, men and moose and pine trees, and he

who understands it aright will rather preserve its life than destroy it.”

–Henry David Thoreau

Well, being that I worship Nature as a supreme goddess, I suppose it would only make sense that I spend at least one small section of the book extolling her virtues and ways to respect her, like not littering, so on and so forth.

Nature is not necessarily a thing to worship if you’re not into that sort of stuff; rather, it is a thing to behold with wonder and reverence. Things of all sorts of natural design, such as plants, animals, bacteria, and fungi, have a varied number of uses when used on other organic material. I refer to consumption or cross-breeding and things of the like, but nature is a giant and infinitely complex web of which we are nowhere near unraveling. Sure, we’ve done bits and pieces here and there, but we don’t even know for certain whether or not DMT stays in the cerebrospinal fluid permanently or if it just remains there for fifteen minutes or so. Recent evidence has shown relativity may be wrong and that faster-than-light travel may be possible (as certain particles can reach that velocity), but we just figured this out not too long ago, and for the longest time were possessed of the idea that faster-than-light travel was completely impossible.

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Then again, everything is ‘natural,’ so to speak, including inorganic material. If it came from the big bang and most likely from a nebula, you can bet it’s organic.

That, in terms of what we understand, encompasses pretty much everything, minus an exception or two.

The only exception that comes to mind at the moment is black holes. Science tells us that a black hole can result from the collapse of a supermassive star and subsequently become a source of seemingly infinite vacuum to a place that we are uncertain of. The only reason I call this an ‘exception’ is because that while it may result from an event that is explained by natural phenomena, the result is quite bizarre and does not appear to make logical sense in terms of physics.

They don’t seem to obey the rules of time, as to my knowledge. All they do is pull in any object that comes near them (including things as fast and light as light itself). Yet, still, since it is ‘half-natural’ and we understand the formation of them

(somewhat), we can just call it a single aberration. As to my knowledge, that is the only item that I would classify as even ‘half-natural.’

So then, how are we to respect nature? Vegetarians and vegans would say we should do so by not eating meat, environmentalists say we should do so by not polluting the environment with toxic chemicals, and Republicans say neither.

Well, I’m inclined to agree with the environmentalists, but not necessarily the vegetarians/vegans. Polluting the environment kills practically everything in the

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environment from the base up; if you kill the flora, you kill the fauna as well, as the fauna will starve. If you cloud up the skies with smog, you kill the flora as you deprive it of sunlight necessary for photosynthesis. If you pollute the soil with toxic chemicals, the flora will absorb those chemicals and subsequently be poisoned by them and killed. This is what we may refer to as ‘eco-cide.’

However, many take offense to it that humankind tailors the environment to their needs, such as building structures, raising cows for slaughter, so on and so forth.

While it may not be the usual ‘living in nature’ thing that other animals do, we are not like other animals in that we have found a comfortable way to live that changes the world around us instead of adapting further to fit in the world. As such, I do not believe that eating meat is an abomination, as it is simply the stronger species preying on the weaker. While we may be ‘higher’ animals, we are still animals.

In the case of animals who are raised on farms for slaughter, I’m really more of a fan of eating free-range cattle, but the animals raised on the farms were basically born and raised for your consumption, and their meat will just be thrown away if it sits around for too long, rendering the whole thing a tad meaningless. I’m certainly not advocating eating meat solely because it would hurt the cow’s feelings, but there is a point to be said for the purpose for which the cow was actually raised. Besides, if we didn’t eat the cows, I’m sure that coyotes or wolves

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or some sort of flying biblical abomination would. Coincidentally, I wonder how

Pegasus meat would taste. Like horse and quail put together?

Like I said, we tailor the environment to ourselves, and while some people may consider this ‘playing god’ and abstain from eating meat and other such silliness

(if you just don’t like meat, good for you. If you think you’re changing something by not eating meat, you are sadly misguided), we might as well be gods to these animals. We have the power of life and death over them, we can choose who they mate with (through hormones and aphrodisiacs), we can change their fundamental being through genetic engineering! We are no longer confined to spears and atlatl, and even then they likely perceived us as higher beings because we could communicate effectively to each other, had command over fire and other such things that are miraculous differences between our race and other pseudo-sentient mammals.

In whatever case, you should do what is best for the various species of the ecosystem (which usually entails leaving well enough alone), but sometimes you need to ‘cull the herd’ by killing off the weaker links in a population so the entire population will not die from lacking necessities, and sometimes you need to inspire breeding in a population in order to combat another threat that you are incapable of culling properly. Much like the human body, there is a delicate balance of nature that can throw everything out of proportion and eradicate entire ecosystems through one simple action, such as deforestation.

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While I may by no means consider myself an ‘environmentalist’ in the connotation that the word has taken on in recent years (which poisons the meaning of the word to me) as a gung-ho crazy blood-flinger on fur coats, I advocate the existence and maintenance of a healthy ecosystem in any given climate. That is not to say that the climate need stay the same; I would rather like it if the area my hometown is in was of a more humid climate, perhaps even jungle-esque. I’ve been to Austin, the capital of Texas, several times before and it was so humid there that at night you could see the condensing water in front of streetlights.

However, I would prefer that the biodiversity of a given ecosystem would remain relatively dense, instead of somewhat desert-esque (like the plains where my hometown actually is) and have a mix of plants and animals that would stimulate the processes of evolution in ways that they had not been stimulated previously.

This is not the view of many people, sadly. Many people see the environment as a thing to strip of ‘resources’ that are pertinent to their ends at the moment. They say “To hell with the ecosystem! There’s gold in them thar hills!” Much of the time there is no gold, and all they’ve really accomplished is the extermination of the environment in that area, or drastically changing it so that every creature there has to fight tooth and nail for survival. The deforestation of the various rainforests across the world is one such resource-mongering tactic that causes nearly

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irreparable harm to the environment. I say ‘nearly’ because the trees will grow back, given enough time, but the otherwise flora and fauna may not.

I’m not entirely certain what the purpose of this is, either. Not like you can’t make paper out of hemp, too. There’s a reason that they call hemp ‘weed;’ it grows like a weed, is ridiculously hardy, and spreads in large quantities. Talk about a plant that’s easy to farm, am I right?

Marijuana for dispensaries has to be kept up to a certain quality standard, but simple marijuana for producing paper and other such products that require human consumption has to be kept to a markedly lower one. While you may get tired of hearing all the possible uses for weed from your stoner buddies every time you go over to hang out, there actually is some truth to most of them. Think of it this way; you get to shut them up and you’re saving the rainforest! That’s what we call ‘making a difference.’ Well, in terms of the ecosystem. Making an impact in other regards is an entirely different matter and usually requires more effort.

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VI:VI:III- Effort

“A man’s work is nothing but this slow trek to rediscover, through the detours of art, those two or three great and simple images in whose presence his heart first

opened.”

–Albert Camus

Effort is the means by which anything of any value is done. Without significant and proportional effort, we either call it a surplus/lack of efficiency or good/bad luck. Efficiency is indeed a wonderful thing, but it works both ways, and contrary to what some people may think, the hardest path is not always the right one. If

I’m digging a trench and have a wheelbarrow to move it to a dirt pile several yards away, why should I pick up the clods with my hands? It really doesn’t seem to add anything…

Of course, usually wisdom such as that is applied to cultural and societal things instead, because pretty much everybody knows that in terms of manual labor the most efficient means of doing things is the best. But, still, there is a great deal of

(physical) effort to be had in order to get anything done in the sense of manual labor.

This is by no means confined to physical effort, though. Rather, I would speak over mental and spiritual efforts.

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Mental effort is what we might call ‘determination’ or ‘work ethic.’ Mental effort is a thing that requires some amount of focus. As such, people seem to be able to not put forth as much mental effort as was the norm in older generations, due to a strange lack of capacity to focus. That’s not to say that there are not individuals capable of doing so, but they are becoming an increasingly rare breed. Most people are so concerned with what is ‘entertaining’ to them versus what should be important to them. It’s hard to even garner someone’s attention for a relatively short story these days. On such a note, I’m wondering how long it will take many people to read this book to this point. However, much as the relationship between mental effort and focus runs one way, so too does it run the other way.

Focus can also be affected by your level of mental effort; if you’re really, really trying to grasp something or get something done, it is highly more likely that your attention span will increase to a longer interval to where you can accomplish more in a given time period without taking as many breaks. In certain instances, individuals will stay awake all night, not eat or drink anything for unhealthy periods of time, and just generally overstretch themselves mentally to the point where they come crashing down.

In the case of all-nighters, I pulled two in a row once (and yes, I did not nap between them) simply because I had so much to do. You just stop feeling tired after about forty hours of being awake and you hit a sort of ‘zen’ phase. However,

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I did become extremely irritable and told a rather emotionally unstable friend of mine to “Go fuck herself” during a casual lunch when all she did was make a slightly pointed comment about another friend of mine. At that point, I realized it would probably be a good idea to get some rest.

That may be a good example of a little too much effort to stay awake. Really, expending too much effort on anything will leave you feeling a little bit mentally fried. As with pretty much everything that I advocate here in Book Six, a happy medium is the way to go.

Now, spiritual effort is a bit different; I would classify this as the need to grow in an individual, and the effort that needs to be put forth to do so. I believe I have met several people who do not know in the slightest what spiritual effort is, and surprisingly enough, every one of them is hyper-religious.

It is through the spiritual effort that we find the need to better ourselves, and this is not necessarily a religious thing; it could be out of an enlightened desire to help our fellow man (which, as I pointed out earlier, is not a thing exclusive to religion as many religious people think). Growing spiritually, to me, is simply taking steps to become ‘enlightened,’ and requires a good amount of effort. For me, it took years upon years of meditation, learning to control my mood swings, and other such exercises. However, they all didn’t really begin to click until I began on the medicine. After that week, all the pieces fell into place.

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Admittedly, a small portion of this book was written before I had attained my calmed demeanor and understanding of things, but they were ‘good enough’ at the moment. But, rest assured, the trip here was one wrought with unenlightened behavior. If you perceive offensive commentary pervading this document, that’s probably why.

Spiritual effort is a thing that takes different degrees for different individuals; some have been raised to be selfless individuals, consider others before themselves, and understand the world around them. However, others have been raised in worlds of anger, hurt, and ignorance. It is markedly harder for an individual who has been taught to hate to love than one who was raised that way to take the next step. Like it has been said, the first step is always the hardest, just like getting out of bed. In the continuation of this metaphor, think of enlightenment as shrugging off the sleepiness that you usually feel after waking up. For some, they can be up, about and perfectly alert in a matter of a few short minutes, where it takes some of us at least an hour to wake up.

In both the metaphorical and literal sense, it takes me forever to wake up. In the metaphorical sense, I am awake now, and I do not wish to go back to sleep, and in this case there is no penalty for sleep deprivation… you only become more awake as you progress in your life. Sleep is for those who feel the need to rest,

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to reset, who carry their anger and their hate around with them, who do not feel the need to cast them off.

To them, I say: Your anger keeps you enslaved, as does your hate. You will never be free of them; they will only compound upon you and eventually make you collapse under their weight. You must make the decision to shed them, bit by bit, and they will eventually dissolve away from you completely, should you choose to pursue them to a point where they will no longer trouble you.

I must warn you, though. When one frees oneself of negative emotion, one also finds oneself lacking in terms of positive emotion as well, as is the truth of balance. So, I would have you know, this path of enlightenment is a long and arduous process which may not be of a desirable end result, in all honesty.

Love is a practice that many look for, either in their families, their friends, or their spouses. However, love opens up even the most enlightened among us to pain; the loss of an individual we love either through death or separation is a great agony to endure. We must worry about those that we love continuously, always wondering if they’re ok, if there’s something we can do to help them. I must advise you, if you seek the purest enlightenment, you must shed emotions such as these. At least, love in the sense of attachment; there is such a thing.

We call love without attachment ‘caring.’ Love has the connotation of reciprocation and desire for constant company, the lack of capacity to live without

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currently. When you care for someone, you want what is absolutely best for them without necessarily becoming attached to them. If they leave, so be it; there will be others. You do not need them to survive emotionally. You can care as deeply as you wish for an individual, even love them, so long as you do not become wrapped up in their sorrows and tribulations. If there is something that you can do for them, feel free to do so, but this requires yet more effort upon your part. I expend a good amount of effort helping those around me, but it is by no means a requirement once you are enlightened to the ways of the world. You will likely feel the same way as I do, feeling caring for other individuals without wrapping your identity up in theirs in such a way that it is extremely painful when they leave; at best, you will feel disappointment, perhaps even a temporary sensation of sorrow, but nothing long-lasting or that you are unable to sort through quickly and easily.

What effort I can tell you to put forth in spiritual regards towards becoming enlightened is this; let go of all your possessions and attachments. Then, it becomes a simple and quick matter to see past why you needed them in the first place. Then, once you let go of enough, you find you are completely free. That is my gift to you: liberation.

Of course, not all can attain liberation, as this is a society where you must work in order to attain things such as food, water and the essentials (and are typically not given these things by asking for alms), and one must work to attain enough

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wealth to afford things such as the essentials for life. They can either do that or live on the dime of their family, friends, charity, the government, etc. However, work is a more rewarding task in the eyes of most, and rightfully so. Living long enough without having to work for anything makes an individual lazy. That’s not to say that working all day every day makes an individual motivated; it can fry your mind quite quickly. As with all things, it is necessary to find a good balance with the aspects of work and leisure. Too much leisure makes you lazy, and too much work makes you frazzled.

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VI:VI:IV- Education

“Develop a passion for learning. If you do, you will never cease to grow.”

–Anthony J. D’Angelo

Education is an important thing in the lives of every man, woman and child in the world. In most places, some base amount of education is compulsory. In the

United States, you are compelled to at least be educated from the ages of six to sixteen, but many (if not most) people are driven to graduate high school, typically at the age of eighteen. An even smaller number out of them goes off to college/university, out of which an even smaller number get a degree. Out of those, some of them pursue post-graduate degrees (such as a master’s degree or doctorate). After all is said and done, only a miniscule amount are among what people consider this country’s “intellectual elite.”

There is a necessity for such things, but people pursue these degrees thinking it will make them smarter when all they do is keep their nose in a textbook and know no applications for their knowledge; that is when it becomes an annoyance.

This is when you have the history teacher who teaches you false history because he has an agenda of some sort (been there, done that), the Calculus teacher who lets a graduate student who speaks barely any English teach the class instead because he knows the material better than the professor. I would list

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some practical examples, but for all I know they could have just been bad at their jobs and not particularly devoid of practical applications for their knowledge.

A base amount of education is a good thing; things that you will use in your everyday life are basic essentials. However, whether or not you believe the knowledge you are receiving to be ‘impractical,’ I would encourage you to at least graduate high school with a degree. The reason for this is that while you may find a lack of merit to what you’re learning in school, there is always a chance for a resurgence of desire to learn. Plus, what do you have to lose? It’s free!

I understand that education is not necessarily a desire that many people feel the need for; indeed, I dropped out of college. I lost that ‘spark’ that I had for higher education after several cruel twists of fate deprived me of much of my money without anything real to show for it. I probably would still be in college enduring my various misfortunes were I not so concerned with writing this book. But, that’s enough about me.

Why it is that cultures do not place high emphasis on education is beyond me, because people who have a base amount of education are the ones who get stuff done. Granted, the world needs laborers, but you should do that if it is what you like doing, not just to get a paycheck. People, no matter what their education level, should be doing what they enjoy most as a career. Education simply grants you more options, options that you are by no means obliged to take.

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For example, do you think I’ve had a class in writing? Nope. Yet, here I am, making some attempt to communicate what I know through the written word. I’d like to think I’m relatively effective at getting my point across without unnecessary repetition (which is, in fact, sometimes necessary).

Now, there is a distinction that must be drawn between ‘knowing’ something and

‘understanding’ something. In short, the answer to “what” is knowing, and the answer to “why” is understanding. You can sit there all day and talk about the intricacies of the mating habits of toucans, but if you can’t tell me why every little maneuver is performed it is very unlikely that you will impress me. To use an example from Book Two, you could diagnose an individual with lung cancer based upon the evidence I lay out, but if you couldn’t determine where it came from it would be relatively unimpressive to me. Now, don’t get me wrong, I would still find it impressive if it was a case where it was as simple as cigarette smoking, but in a case like this where the ‘why’ isn’t that hard to guess, I would find your initial conclusion slightly lacking.

Good levels of knowing and understanding complement each other nicely. With knowledge and no understanding, you are ineffectual. With understanding and no knowledge, you are ignorant.

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VI:VI:V- Wisdom

“A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination.”

–Nelson Mandela

Wisdom can be taken to mean ‘understanding’ as in the last chapter. So, we’re given a basic definition of wisdom; knowing how things are applied in reality.

Wisdom is a requirement in certain fields, such as the application of certain medicines on the human body, understanding the formation of ideas in philosophy, so on and so forth. It also helps in understanding the impact of your decisions on the environment around you, and the impact of the decisions of others on you. It could also be said to help keep your emotions in check and prevent you from ‘flying off the handle.’

Unlike knowledge, wisdom is not necessarily a requirement for any type of higher thinking, so it is not as highly encouraged as going to school. A good way to build up your understanding of the world around you is by reading dense literature, such as philosophy or religious books. As an example, I started reading

Nietzsche at age fourteen because his logic, which I now consider fallacious and infantile, was something that I could understand at that point and thusly built upon. Since then, I’ve read essays from practically every non-contemporary philosopher that has been around since before the 1900’s. I would read later, but

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it’s usually just their opinion on something that is easily extrapolated from the essay that they are discussing about some issue.

Unsurprisingly, the most interesting philosopher I’ve ever read has been

Gautama Buddha in the Lotus Sutra. He speaks in such a way it takes a relatively developed mind to understand it, but not in such a way that once it is capable of being understood fully it seems cryptic or vague. Granted, there are several paradoxes, but that is often the way of things.

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VI:VI:VI- Other Stories

My Master has shown me a great deal of things whilst I sleep, some directly from him and some probably simply recollections of memories during the day.

Regardless, I present them now for you.

The Cane

This was actually a play that I attended while I slept- I entered a crowded theater, filled with smoke and haze and patrons of every shape, size and persuasion.

However, when the horn sounded, everyone sat and listened attentively. I have taken the liberty of writing the play as though it were my own work. But, make no mistake, it isn’t. If only I knew proper citation procedures for nightmares and devilish hallucinations.

You may very well notice that several of the things I have written earlier are explicitly stated in this story. Where did you think I got them from?

Characters

Klaus- An old man, later played by a young man. Always carries a cane, has coarse voice.

Bob Krussel- A devout father, married to Karen

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Karen Krussel- Bob’s spouse, loving mother

Miranda- A very beautiful, but awkward and shy teenage girl

Timothy- The Krussel’s young son, a timid child

The Man In Black (Satan)

Minor Characters

Big Jim – A bully at Timothy’s school

Michael – A wino who impedes Klaus

Priest – Presides over a funeral, and also a figure in Klaus’ story. Can be played by same actor.

Cyrus- Klaus’ younger brother

Ruth- Klaus’ mother

Funeral guests

Jasmin- Miranda’s friend

Cassandra- Another friend of Miranda

Three Thugs

Timothy’s Classmates

Townsfolk (at least five)

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Act I, Scene I

(It is a dark night, and the Krussel’s hometown illuminates in the background.

There are three buildings on the main street that an old Klaus is walking down- a pharmacy, a pawn shop, and a liquor store. It is snowing heavily, but without any wind whatsoever. The buildings appear very worn, and only retain slight bits of their original color. Klaus is wearing a very thick jacket, hiding his decrepit and emaciated figure. He hobbles along with the help of a very posh wooden cane, expertly stained and gilded with gold on the top and bottom. On his way to the

Krussel house, he is stopped by Michael, an obviously intoxicated hobo in front of the liquor store. A single streetlight illuminates where he is leaning up against the liquor store.)

Michael: Oh, what? It looks like we got a-nother rich what’sit come to look down at us through his mono’cull. I gots nothing to say to you, Richie rich.

Klaus: I do not mean to be rude, but there is much to be done. I haven’t time to stop and chat, loveable vagabond.

Michael (irritated): Oh, really? So your time is worth more than mine now, is it?

What is so goddam important that it can’t wait for jus’ a secon’ for a poor tramp down on ‘is luck? I see how you are, you snob bastard.

Klaus (unhurriedly): My time fritters away. There is much to be done. Step aside and allow me to pass, my friend.

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Michael: You dun’ sound too busy there, friend. Tell you what, how about you make time for me? (He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a knife, and extends the blade, making a threatening gesture at Klaus.) Spare some change?

Klaus: Ah, you fool.

Michael (confused): Wha’sis? Usually you old buggers run scared when sum fella flashes steel.

Klaus: You presume that I am as weak as I appear. You must either be quite drunk or quite stupid.

Michael (infuriated): Ain’t no bugger talk to me like that! Taste the blade, you snob!

(Michael stabs at Klaus, but he dodges the knife and clubs him on the back of the neck with the cane very swiftly. Michael falls on the pointed tip of his own knife and ends up stabbing himself through one of his lungs. He manages to sit up against the side of a nearby building of little importance. He is coughing up blood.)

You bastard. You done killed me. Wha’ did I eva’ do ta you? All I wanted was a caring ear. (Blood spurts out of his mouth.)

Klaus: Don’t try to justify what you have just done. You were trying to mug a seemingly feeble old man who may or may not have a mental disorder. Don’t mask what you did. You deserve what you have gotten, for I know you would

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have done the same to me if I had truly been as weak as I appear. Know the truth before you die.

Michael: Hah. The truth. (Coughs up more blood.) You know, I once thought I knew the truth. I used to be a good Christian, and what. Then my priest tried to get me to ‘do him a favor.’ That ain’t turn out well. That was a bunch of bull.

Klaus: I suppose being drunk and dying in a gutter is better.

Michael: Yeah, you’re damn right it is! At least I’m not lying to myself about being better than everyone else!

Klaus: Yes you are. You most certainly are. You stopped me because you thought your time more valuable than mine. You are lying about yourself, because you think that you are not self-righteous, and that you are worth something.

Michael: You piece of sh- (coughs up blood, splatters quite violently). I suppose you may be right. Tha’ stuff stays with you til’ you die, you know. Damn those lying bastards. Putting that stuff into my head.

Klaus: Perhaps they are at fault for programming you, but it is your fault that you are here now, with your own blood on your hands, on the ground, and seeping forth violently. It was your own choices that got you here, not some distant abuse in the past. Now, if you will excuse me, there is much to be done. I must get going. (He begins walking off towards the house.)

Michael: Wait!

(Klaus turns slowly to look at him.)

Klaus: What is it?

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Michael (desperately): Don’t let me die like this. Please, sir, I don’t want to die by my own hand, all alone.

Klaus: I will regret this, but I shall keep you company. Do remember, there is much to be done.

(Klaus sits down beside him)

Michael (distant): So, fella, who are you? Where are you from?

Klaus: That information will not be of any pertinence to you where you’re going.

Michael: Wha’sis? What do you mean where I’m goin’? I did’n think that you was a Christian, telling me about ‘how things are.’

Klaus: Not at all. You will dream after this. You will slowly slip off into unconsciousness, and your waking life shall cease, replaced entirely by the dream world. That is what is destined to happen, and what has been proved to happen.

Michael: That sounds horrid.

Klaus: How so?

Michael: I may not even know that I’m dead, you see? I want to know that I’m free of this world. I want to be killed violently. (Coughs up blood.) I mean quickly.

Klaus: Ah, I can help you with that.

(Klaus stands and grips his cane like a baseball bat. He swings with all of his force, and smashes Michael’s skull into thousands of tiny fragments all over the sidewalk. Michael is dead before he hits the ground, and permanently etched on

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his face is an expression of surprise. He gurgles, and more blood pours from him.)

Your wish is my command.

(Klaus inspects the cane and notices that there is not the slightest amount of blood or any blemish on it; however, he is not surprised in the slightest. He puts the cane back on the ground, places his weight on it yet again, and begins to hobble off-stage towards the Krussel house, whistling a haunting tune as he goes, a slight spring in his step where there wasn’t one before.)

There is much to be done, there is so much to be done…

Act I, Scene II

(The Krussel house illuminates in the background. The house is an eight-room, middle sized, single story house. There are three bedrooms, one bathroom, a kitchen, a dining room, a sitting area and an entryway. It is still pitch black outside. Bob, Karen, Miranda and Timothy are all sound asleep. Bob and Karen are sleeping with their backs to each other, Timothy is having a vivid nightmare, and Karen is having a fantasy. Timothy and Karen are both mumbling things in their sleep pertaining to their dreams. Klaus slowly walks onstage, makes his

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way to the front door and knocks on it very loudly. All of the Krussels emerge from their sleep.)

Karen (drowsy): Who is it at this hour? Whatever it is, it can wait until morning.

Bob: Now, honey, it may be someone urgently in need. We can’t say no.

Karen (disinterested): Whatever. (She goes back to sleep.)

Klaus: Is anybody home? Have mercy on a poor, freezing man. I have nowhere to call home.

(Timothy and Miranda enter their parents’ bedroom.)

Timothy: Dad, is it that drunk man come to harass us again?

Bob: No, son, it appears to be someone else. He sounds nothing like Michael.

(He peers out the bedroom window.) He certainly isn’t some burly thug. It’s just a poor old man. Perhaps he was one of the ones turned out when the local retirement home closed down. What do you think, kids?

Miranda (in the same tone as her mother): Whatever.

Timothy: It doesn’t matter what we say, you’re going to let him come in anyway.

Bob: Now, that’s not true.

(Klaus knocks on the door again.)

Klaus: Please, kind homeowner, I am a frail old man and I may die if I am left out in the cold any longer.

(Bob sighs.)

Bob: Well, I guess you kids were right. I can’t say no.

Miranda: Admission is the first step to recovery. Good job, Dad.

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(Bob, Miranda and Timothy all go to front door and open it.)

Klaus (with cheer): Greetings, good sir! Might a lonely wanderer have a meal and a bed for the night?

Bob: I don’t see why not, we have more than enough for ourselves. Come in, come in.

(Klaus enters the house, and removes his heavy jacket. He is frail and emaciated, giving the appearance of incredible brittleness and weakness.

Despite removing his jacket, he still clutches the cane.)

Klaus: Thank you for your kindness, good sir. If only everyone were as generous as you.

(Klaus takes a seat at the four-person dinner table. Timothy and Miranda sit at his left and right hand, respectively. Bob goes into the adjoining kitchen and begins making soup for him while he interrogates him.)

Bob: So, stranger, what can we call you?

Klaus: My name is Klaus.

Bob: Do you have a last name, Klaus?

Klaus: I do, but it is unnecessary and meaningless. My family is dead, and it serves no purpose but to identify me with a long line of corpses.

Bob (startled by his response): Oh, well… That’s nice… So, Klaus, where are you from?

Klaus: I am from a tiny town in the country.

Bob: Does this town have a name, or is it unnecessary and meaningless as well?

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Klaus: Quite. It no longer exists. It was completely destroyed many years ago, most likely before you were born, good sir.

Bob: Oh, I’m sorry.

Klaus: It was a ghost town. All life had left that place. Everything had either died or fled. Even the grass refused to grow. The only building left was the chapel.

Bob (finishing the soup): That is very interesting. Your soup is done. I’ll get you some bread for it. (He roots around the pantry.)

Klaus: Ah, good. It has been a good while since I have had a full meal. The world is not so kind as you, good sir.

(Bob presents his meal to him, and Klaus nods in appreciation. Bob joins his son and daughter at the table, opposite Klaus. Klaus has several spoonfuls of soup, then turns his attention to the family watching him intently as he eats.)

Do you have a question for me?

Timothy (intrigued): So, what did you do before you became a drifter? Certainly you haven’t been a mooch all your life.

Bob: Timothy! That is very rude behavior! I have taught you better than that!

Klaus: I take no offense, kind sir. Before I renounced the shackles of existence, I was a teacher. I would like to think that particular aspects of my personality that I gained from that experience have stayed with me.

Miranda: Where did you teach? The school for the psychotic?

Bob: Miranda! What is wrong with you children?

Miranda: Well, he is weird.

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Klaus: I take no offense. She is correct, I am a slightly offbeat fellow. You cannot expect to live through the ravages of this life and not be somewhat odd, lest you be a complete idiot. However, to answer your question, I taught at a college- I was a professor of Philosophy.

Bob (surprised): Oh! You’re a professor! I never would have guessed. What made you give up your position?

Klaus (aloof): I knew too much.

Bob: You knew too much?

Klaus: Yes, there are certain things of which men do not speak. Horrible things that man secretly knows, but refuses to consciously acknowledge. I began research into these things, and I was fired from my job.

Bob: The college fired you for doing research?

Klaus: It was not my colleagues- it was the parents of my students. Some of them do not possess the linguistic skills that I do, and my message came across as slightly insane when they told it. They were outraged- they formed a league and petitioned the school, threatening to withdraw their students from the college completely if I was not let go. My colleagues had no choice, so I was set free from that life, off to teach my message outside the confines of scholasticism.

Bob: What exactly was your message?

Klaus (sits back, grins): All in due time.

Bob (puzzled): What do you mean, all in due time?

Klaus: There is much to be done before you will understand. It took me years to teach them. I shall try to teach you in as short a time as possible, if you will listen.

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Bob (leaning in): By all means.

Klaus: Not tonight. You have done enough for this night. Could you show me where I will be staying?

Bob: Well, I suppose you can stay in Timothy’s room.

Timothy: What?

Bob: Consider this your punishment for sassing our guest.

(Miranda points at Timothy and laughs.)

Don’t be so eager to make a joke, Miranda. He’s going to be sleeping in your room tonight. Consider this your punishment as well.

Miranda (outraged): What? I am not spending a night with that little bedwetter!

Last time I did, I woke up all wet!

Timothy (hotly embarrassed, defensive): Yeah, well you’re not so great either! I didn’t even wet the bed last time, you were just so sweaty from rolling around all night and moaning!

Bob (losing his temper): Enough! You two are going to sleep together tonight, and that is that!

Timothy: Well, at least give me something to hit her with if she starts flailing around again! We could go get a baseball bat, or… (He sets his eyes on the cane.) That will do! (He points at it.)

Bob: Stop pestering our guest!

Klaus: It is quite alright, good sir. He meant no harm.

(Miranda’s attention shifts to the cane as well.)

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Miranda: Where did you get that thing? It’s beautiful! It could probably pay for a much nicer coat and a hat for you!

Klaus: This is a gift, from a friend of mine. It is indeed beautiful- he made it himself. However, he does expect it back very soon.

Miranda: What kind of friend gives you a gift and makes you return it to him?

Klaus: I shall soon have no use for this. It is his, made with his toil, and he expects it back in pristine condition. I have simply borrowed it.

Miranda: Wait, so is it a gift or are you just borrowing it?

Klaus: Both and neither.

Miranda (thoroughly confused): What?

Klaus: There is much to be done before you will understand.

Miranda: Pssh, ‘there is much to be done.’ You have your entire life to do those things.

Klaus: Perhaps, but would you procrastinate until you are as old as I, and each day you wake up is a miracle?

Miranda: You do have a point.

Bob (waving the children away): Go to bed! Leave me with our guest. (They begrudgingly get up, push in their chairs, and go into Miranda’s bedroom, where they quickly fall asleep.)

Klaus: You have performed quite well, considering that you have no spouse to keep the children in line with you.

Bob: I am married. My wife is in the bedroom, sleeping.

Klaus: Did Karen not wish to join you in greeting your visitor?

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Bob: No, Karen… (He stares at him, startled.) How did you know my wife’s name?

Klaus: Oh, Robert, there is much to be done before you will understand. (He slowly rises from the table, placing his weight on the cane. He walks slowly towards Timothy’s room.)

There is much to be done, so much to be done…

(Bob remains seated at the table with a very disturbed and confused look on his face. He places his head in his hands, and the scene fades to black.)

Act II, Scene I

(It is Friday morning at the Krussel household, and the entire family is up for breakfast, eating cold cereal with milk. Klaus emerges from the bedroom, still carrying his cane, and seems to have aged even further in the time that he slept.

The light emphasizes his wrinkles and furrows, and his form appears even sicklier in the day. Bob turns pale at his appearance, but the children simply wave and Karen smiles.)

Klaus: Good morning, Krussel family.

Karen, Miranda and Timothy: Good morning, Klaus.

Miranda: How did you sleep?

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Klaus: It was eventful, but sadly not very refreshing.

Miranda: I’ll say. You look like hell.

(Miranda’s eyes widen and she waits for her father’s reprimand, but he makes no show of disciplining her. Instead, his eyes are intently fixed on Klaus.)

Klaus (turning to Karen): Ah, so you must be Robert’s wife! I’ve heard so much about you.

Karen: Why, I’m flattered. You must be the loveable hobo come to spend the night at our house whom our children love so much. I must say, their descriptions of your cane fail to capture it.

Klaus: Indeed, it is a marvel. It is of divine beauty.

Karen: Quite. Where did you get-

Bob (interrupting): When are you leaving, Klaus?

Klaus: I am in no hurry. If you desire that I leave, then I shall honor your request.

However, if you wish to prolong my stay, I shall honor that as well.

Miranda: Can he stay a little longer? Please? I want to talk to him some more so

I can sound smarter around my friends.

Timothy: Yeah, can he stay?

(Bob looks at his family’s smiling faces and their disposition towards Klaus, and he relents.)

Bob: Fine, he can stay.

Klaus: Thank you, good sir.

Timothy: Here, Klaus, take my seat. I have to get off to school, anyway.

Miranda: Me too.

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Karen: I have to go seal some deals. Being a real estate developer isn’t as easy as it may seem. (Soft chuckle.)

Klaus: Blessings upon your day, Krussel family.

Karen, Miranda, Timothy: Thanks, Klaus!

(They depart, leaving Bob and Klaus opposite each other at the table.)

Bob: So, Klaus, would you like some cereal?

Klaus: Indeed, Robert. Thank you for your kindness.

Bob: I don’t recall ever telling you my name.

Klaus: I don’t believe that you did.

Bob: Would you mind explaining to me how you know my name then? What about my wife?

Klaus: You had the dream about falling again, didn’t you?

Bob (startled): What?

Klaus: You know, that dream where you are falling from somewhere and you land in the ocean. You scramble to the shore only to find your way back to your house, but all that is left is rubble. Scratched in that post over there is ‘I’m taking the kids, Bob.’ Then you fall to your knees and you weep, because your family is lost, gone forever, stolen from you. You know that without them, your life is empty and meaningless. You look up and you are lost, lost in a forest, and the sun refuses to shed any light upon you. You are wretched, and your failure consumes you, and delivers you to the blackest depths of your soul.

Bob: How the hell did you know that?

Klaus: Would you like to know what your wife and children dreamt about?

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Bob: What the hell are you talking about?

Klaus: Your wife has been dreaming of another man. Not one that she actually knows; he is faceless, and featureless. However, he pleasured her in a way that you never could. He made love to her for her, not out of some misguided egotistical boast or cold procreation. He considered her every need before she had them. He whispered into her ear how much he loved her. He showed her how beautiful she really is. And afterwards, they both sat and cuddled, and watched the world pass them by.

Bob: How do you know this?

Klaus: Your children had interesting dreams as well; Miranda dreamt of Ramon, not too uncommon. They were so happy together- they had gotten married, had kids, and gotten their own house. Every whim of hers was answered, and she in turn nurtured him. However, this is a fantasy; for they cannot love each other as they were meant to if things persist as they are.

Bob: Stop, answer my questions!

Klaus: Timothy had his usual nightmare- masked faces and robed figures gathering around him, inflicting horrible pain upon him, forcing him to suffer humiliation, and other things. But after they had finished, they removed their disguises and showed themselves to be his classmates. Their leader was Big

Jim. He curled up in a ball and let their taunting laughter consume him.

Bob: What manner of demon are you?

Klaus: Demon? You give me too much credit. I am but a human who has seen too much for his own good. These things, I believe, I would be better off not

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knowing. I apologize for peering into your dreams, but it is beyond my grasp to stop it.

Bob: How… how did you learn to do this?

(Klaus taps his cane on the floor.)

Klaus: It is but a trick, an innate ability that humans possess to empathize. This is simply a narrow, specific type of empathy. This is one of the dark areas that I researched at my college.

Bob: Mind reading?

Klaus: Not quite. Each individual’s thoughts are quite different, and most do not think in concrete words. The most you can hope for is a general idea of their emotional state. Dreams are another matter, though. Humans can interact in the world of dreams, just as they do in this one.

Bob: You are in our dreams?

Klaus: Indeed. You know, in your wife’s dreams, she is your daughter’s age and has her body.

Bob: So, you’re telling me that you watched my wife make love to a stranger?

Klaus: In a sense. It was fragmented- a few moments of passion, a few sweet nothings, and then they were laying together, his face blurred and clouded.

Bob: Why are you telling me this?

Klaus: Because you can be that man, Bob. You can be her ideal lover. You can be the one who can make her see a god in the bed with her. You can make her love you again. Simple love can sometimes solve the most complex problems.

Bob: Really? Thinking positive isn’t going to make my penis any bigger.

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Klaus: The size of your member has very little to do with it. Sex for men is an expression of masculinity, a pissing contest, a time waster. However, for women, it is the height of pleasure, emotion, and tenderness. If you both consider each other’s needs, then it will be the best either of you has ever had.

Bob: This is insane. Do you actually think that I believe that you can see our dreams?

Klaus: If you don’t, why are you listening?

Bob (hesitant): I don’t know.

Klaus: Because you fear losing your wife. Robert, I guarantee you this- if you cannot satisfy her as a lover, she will find a man who will, and it will destroy your family. Adultery is either a last resort or an act of spite- Karen would commit adultery simply to know what really being pleasured is like. Others commit adultery in order to send a message to a controlling spouse. If you and your wife fail to listen to each other, then your family shall split and be shattered. From the four, you shall become one- one, alone, destined to failure and death, nothing left for you to do.

Bob (somewhat worried): What should I do? How can this happen?

Klaus: Call her. Tell her that you understand what she needs. As a matter of fact, you can do it right now. She isn’t sealing a deal. She’s just looking at houses, sighing, thinking about how different her life would be in each one.

Bob: Thank you, Klaus. Thank you for all that you have done for me.

Klaus: Save your thanks. There is still much to be done.

(Klaus reaches into his pocket and procures two small pills.)

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Here, take one of these and give the other to Karen when she comes home.

Bob (puzzled): What are these?

Klaus: You don’t need to know. All you need to know is that they will help you show her how you feel about her, and you don’t want me around when it kicks in.

Bob: Thank you so much, Klaus. You can stay with us for as long as you want.

Klaus: Thank you, kind sir. Blessings to you.

(Klaus rises slowly from the table, places his weight on his cane, and hobbles out the door and eventually offstage.)

Goodbye for now, Robert.

Bob: Goodbye, Klaus. (He picks up the phone in the kitchen and dials Karen’s number. Slow fade to black.) Hey, honey! Are you busy? Oh. Well, come home then. Klaus has been telling me some interesting things, and I have something that I want to show you…

Act II, Scene II

(In the background, Timothy’s school illuminates. It is a large, drab looking building with an adjacent playground. As the scene opens, a bell rings, and students come running forth, darting for the playground. The children are all playing and having fun, with the exception of Timothy. He is seated, curled up at the edge of the building, watching the other children play. Enter Big Jim and his posse from the school. Timothy notices him coming.)

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Timothy (desperately): Oh, please don’t come over here. Please, God, don’t let him come over here.

(Big Jim sees him, and a stupid grin breaks out on his face.)

Big Jim: Hey guys, look! Our favorite punching bag is back at school. Let’s have a bit of fun with him today.

Timothy (fearful): No, Jim! Please, leave me alone.

Big Jim: Aww, he’s scared. Don’t worry Little Tim, we’re going to have lots of fun together.

Timothy: Seriously, I will give you anything to leave me alone.

Big Jim: Really? Anything? (He thinks for a moment.) Give me your lunch.

Timothy: But I need my lunch.

Big Jim: You said ‘anything.’ Are you lying? Are you a dirty little liar?

Timothy: No, Jim!

Big Jim: Yes you are. You are a liar. Do you know what I do to liars?

Timothy: No, don’t do it! You can have my lunch! Just take it! (Timothy pulls a brown bag from behind him and gives it to Jim. Timothy bursts into tears.)

Big Jim (with a smirk): Yeah, that’ll do. That’ll do just fine. (He looks into the bag, then looks at Timothy, then back into the bag. He raises his head, and punches

Timothy square in the face, which makes him fall on the ground. Timothy writhes in pain.)

Timothy: Why did you hit me? I gave you my lunch!

Big Jim: Yeah, but I don’t like ham sandwiches. Your bitch of a mother can’t cook for crap anyway, you little pussy. (Big Jim and his posse leave Timothy on

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the ground, and they walk off laughing. Enter Klaus, moseying along with the help of his cane. He gets within a few short feet of Timothy before he notices him there, despite the loud clacking of his cane against the pavement.)

Timothy (wiping tears): Klaus! What are you doing here?

Klaus: So, is Big Jim bothering you again?

Timothy: Again?

Klaus: That brute’s mother never hugged him. Not once. Not in the twelve years that he has been alive has she ever hugged him. He was conceived while his mother was seventeen years old, in an act of lust and stupidity.

Timothy: What?

Klaus: His father ran from his mother once she told him that she was pregnant.

He died in a bar fight a few years ago. The damn fool got drunk and started shooting his mouth off. Got a bottle cracked over his head, and stabbed with it.

Timothy (mystified): How do you know this, Klaus?

Klaus: That is not important right now. What is important is why you take his abuse.

Timothy: I can’t fight back. He’s bigger than me.

Klaus: That is not the reason. It is because you fear him.

Timothy: Are you saying I’m a coward?

Klaus: Fear is no indication of cowardice; however, yes, I do believe you are a coward.

Timothy: How do you know that? You have only been with us for one night!

Klaus: Would you like me to show you how I know that?

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(Klaus backhands Timothy across the face with his left hand. There is a resounding ‘smack.’ Timothy steps back, shocked that Klaus would strike him.)

Timothy: Why did you do that?

Klaus: Going to turn the other cheek, are you?

Timothy: Stop!

Klaus: Your anger is there for a reason, Timothy! It is there so that you may overcome your fear and conquer your obstacles!

(Klaus backhands Timothy with his right hand.)

Do not deny your anger! Accept it! It is as much a part of you as your flesh and blood!

(Klaus begins to backhand Timothy again with his left hand, but Timothy grabs his arm, wrenches it, and punches Klaus in the torso. However, he is not fazed in the slightest. He simply resumes his standing pose, cane in his hands.)

Timothy: Oh my God! I’m so sorry, Klaus.

Klaus: What are you sorry for? You have learned an important lesson today. As for myself, it does not hurt- one must feel something to feel pain.

Timothy: Are you sure that you’re alright? Are you sure I didn’t hurt you?

Klaus: I am not your concern. Big Jim is your concern. As of this moment, I believe he is about to eat your lunch. It is time you retook what is rightfully yours.

Timothy: Yeah! I’m not taking any more crap from him, any more!

(Timothy runs off stage, and a few seconds later Big Jim comes flying from the wings and lands on his face. Timothy follows quickly, along with Big Jim’s posse, who watch but do not interfere.)

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Big Jim (incredibly surprised): What? What’s happening? What’s this?

Timothy: Justice is what’s happening! This is for everything you’ve ever done to me, and all the other poor kids! (Timothy falls on him in a flurry of punches. Jim lands two good hits, but neither is effective in the slightest. Eventually, Jim curls up into a ball, the same position that Timothy was in earlier.)

Timothy: Who’s the pussy now, Jim?

Big Jim: Stop! Please stop!

Timothy: Give me back my lunch, Jim!

Big Jim: Okay, okay! (He reaches for the brown paper bag, grabs it and quickly hands it to Timothy.) Just please, stop!

Timothy: Great, just great. (He looks at Jim, and fakes throwing a punch at him.

He stops his fist just over an inch from his face. Jim wets himself in fear, and runs offstage in embarrassment. Timothy’s classmates stop their playing and cheer.)

Classmates: Yay, Timothy just beat up Big Jim!

(Timothy turns to Jim’s posse.)

Timothy: Do you want some of this, too?

Thug One: Naw, man. You’re cool. We all just hung around Big Jim ‘cause he was the best fighter at school. Since you kicked his ass, that makes you the best.

Timothy: You certainly are loyal. (He walks up to Thug One, and slaps him across the face.)

Thug Two: What did you do that for?

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Timothy: All those times Big Jim beat me up and took my things, you either did nothing or helped him. Now you think that everything that you ever did to me will be forgiven because I beat up one kid?

Thug Three: It sounds stupid when you say it like that.

Timothy: Because it is stupid. Get out of here. (They turn and leave. Timothy, ecstatic, goes back to Klaus.) I did it, Klaus! I beat up Big Jim! Thanks!

Klaus: You need not thank me, Timothy. All you needed to defeat him was already inside you. All I did was make you aware that it was there. I do regret that

I had to strike you in order to show you that, though.

Timothy: It’s fine. I can’t even feel it anymore.

(Pause)

Klaus: Well Timothy, it is about time that I get going. There is much to be done.

Your classmates may try to inflate your ego, but remember that there is something to be said for having a cool head. Try to teach them what I taught you- all you need to get it done is inside you, whatever the task ahead of you may be.

Timothy: Thank you so much, Klaus. I’ll never forget this.

Klaus: No, you won’t. Goodbye, Timothy.

Timothy: Goodbye, Klaus.

(Klaus walks slowly offstage, while Timothy’s classmates crowd him and they all run offstage towards the school as the bell rings, leaving Klaus alone on the stage.)

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Klaus: There is much to be done…

(He exits. Fade to black.)

Act II, Scene III

(Miranda’s High School illuminates in the background. All of the students are wearing identical uniforms- the girls are wearing small skirts and hose, and the boys are wearing slacks. The bell rings to release the students from school.

Miranda, Jasmin and Cassandra exit from the side door. They duck into a corner of the building, apparent only to the audience. Miranda produces a pack of cigarettes, provides them to her friends, and lights them. They smoke.)

Miranda: School is such a downer.

Jasmin: Yeah, you said it. (Blows smoke out her nose.) All of this dramatic crap wears very thin very quickly. I can’t believe that those sluts made up that rumor about you, Miranda.

Cassandra: Yeah, like they’re ones to be lecturing on chastity. They’ll force their way on to any guy with a thousand dollars in the bank, and when they leave they will have nothing at all, except a few more STDs than they started with.

Miranda: Those syphilis-ridden bitches have no room to discuss what me and

Ramon do in our private time.

Cassandra: So, Miranda, is what they said true?

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Miranda (taken aback): What? How can you believe that?

Jasmin: Come on, Miranda. You and Ramon have been dating for a long time.

Do you seriously expect us to believe that you haven’t…

Miranda: No!

Jasmin (doubtful): You can’t be serious. So whose idea was this whole thing?

Miranda: It was both of ours! What, we can’t have a mutual agreement about chastity?

Cassandra: Come on, Miranda. We know you better than that. (She exhales smoke.) We grew up with you. We know how you work.

Miranda (with downcast eyes): It’s his idea. His family is devout Catholic, and they would undoubtedly tell the priest if they had even the slightest suspicion that we were sleeping together. Then, we couldn’t get married.

Cassandra: Poor Miranda. Look on the bright side, it’s just a few months until school gets out and you can get married to him. And then, on your honeymoon night, you’ll finally be able to make love. (She finishes her cigarette. She throws it on the ground and smolders it with her foot. Jasmin follows suit.) Peace out.

Jasmin and I are going shopping.

Miranda: Oh, okay, have fun.

(Cassandra and Jasmin begin to exit, and then Klaus enters. Cassandra and

Jasmin pass him on their way to the exit. Jasmin stops and looks at him.)

Jasmin: What do you think you are doing here, old man?

Klaus: I was not aware that I was trespassing.

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Jasmin: What the hell are you doing walking around by the high school? Why are you looking at me like that?

Klaus: Do not assume I enjoy your shriveled figure. To the contrary, your extreme emaciation disgusts me. At least my own gauntness is a product of nature, not sticking my finger in my mouth after I eat. Your self-confidence problems, pallid pseudo-intellect and jealousy issues only further my nausea at your presence.

Jasmin (completely taken aback): What?

Miranda (noticing Klaus, hiding cigarette behind her): Hey! Klaus! What are you doing here?

(Klaus nods at her. Jasmin turns to her.)

Jasmin: You know this freak?

Miranda: Yes, Klaus is a drifter who is staying with our family for a while. He used to be a professor.

Jasmin: What the hell is wrong with him?

Klaus: I am still here, mind you.

Jasmin: Shut up.

Miranda: Jasmin! Be nice! I know he’s a little odd, but he’s a great guy.

Jasmin: Whatever, I’ll leave you and your pedophile friend to talk. Let’s go,

Cassy. (They exit.)

Klaus (coolly): What a bitch. Presuming to know people.

Miranda: To be fair, Klaus, you did the same thing.

Klaus: Perhaps, but at least I was right.

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Miranda: What?

Klaus: Everything I said is true. Do you know why she doesn’t eat lunch with you? It’s because she stuffs her face and then vomits it all up. Her obsession with your boyfriend, Ramon, has left her psyche completely shattered. She constantly lashes out at people she doesn’t even know, such as myself. She both loathes and loves herself. She pretends to be intelligent, to know anything at all, which is nothing short of absurd.

Miranda: How do you know that? You just met her.

Klaus: I know many things that I cannot explain in earthly terms. Also, you need not hide your cigarette from me. I know very well that you have been smoking ever since you and Ramon got together because it gives you the pleasure that he will not. Your friends lack a good reason- their own vanity, keeping them thin, is the only reason they do it.

Miranda: How did you know that? Did you read my diary?

(Klaus pulls out a cigarette and lights it, sparking the match on his face. His hands shake tremendously. He begins smoking.)

Klaus: Ah, if only it were that simple. If only I could explain this with something so mundane as ‘reading it somewhere.’ The truth is, my knowledge of these things is yet another gift I have been given. Even a lie raises more questions here- if I did read it in your diary, how did I know that Jasmin is obsessed with

Ramon and is bulimic if you did not?

Miranda: That’s not true. That’s not true at all.

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Klaus: Oh, but it is. Jasmin’s missing teeth aren’t from fighting. They came out in the toilet with her lunch. That stink on her breath when she returns to school is her own fluid, forced through her throat by her own hand. She secretly loathes you for stealing Ramon from her, and she lets her hate simmer beneath the surface, because she believes you are not worthy of him. She believes that she can break his chastity. She pretends to be your friend, only seeking the moment for when she can betray your trust.

Miranda: That’s insane.

Klaus: Yes, yes it is. Ramon’s chastity is a thing of superstition and fear, not of logic and reason. She, as superstitious and fearful as he, believes that she can break him, but with those instruments she is doomed to failure. It is not Ramon’s purity I am concerned for- it is yours.

Miranda: What?

Klaus: You have begun to feel it. You know what you are, and what you were made for. He will not deliver unto you the pleasure you deserve, so sometimes you daydream of having another man do to you what he refuses to. Granted, it is only a passing fantasy, but soon the urge will grow much stronger as time passes. Eventually, it will grow so strong that you cannot deny it, and you will give in. When that comes, it will destroy you- both of you. Your lives together will shatter. You will head your separate ways, and tread separate paths of sorrow, always remembering that you had the chance to be happy. That will haunt you as your misery consumes you.

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Miranda: You… are absolutely right. I know exactly what you are talking about.

But how do you know what will happen?

Klaus: It is but a projection, based upon observation. I have seen the very same thing happen dozens, nay, hundreds of times. Your relationship is not as unique as you would believe it is. This forced virginity has been a problem for more than a thousand years. It is utterly without virtue, simply another form of ignorance passed off as noble.

Miranda: But what about all of the bad things that can happen?

Klaus: Do you believe that a completely meaningless ritual of joining cures you of herpes sores? Do you believe that every person that engages in premarital sex has had dozens and dozens of other partners? Do you believe that the first time you have premarital sex that you will catch every disease known to man, get pregnant, and your god will smite you?

Miranda (hesitant): No.

Klaus: Being joined together in a bond by a pedophile changes nothing about you biologically. As a matter of fact, it changes absolutely nothing about you, beyond what you believe yourself has changed. Because you perceive it, it is.

Since you and Ramon are both clean, all that intercourse would require is some form of contraceptive in order to prevent pregnancy.

Miranda: Well, what should I do about this?

Klaus: Ramon is open to reason. His superstition has not clouded his judgment, and you can explain to him exactly what I have told you. It is a natural thing to

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join together in such a way, even without the purpose of procreation. There is a reason that it causes such pleasure and invokes such desire.

Miranda: Klaus… why me? I know I’m not the only one who is in this situation.

Surely, this applies to others as well.

Klaus: I have told you this because I sense a virtue in you- honesty, reasonability, and capacity to see beyond deception. You know very well that I offer no deception to you, don’t you?

Miranda: You may have not deceived my family and I, but you have been rather evasive of certain things.

Klaus: Not telling you something and blatantly lying to your face are two different things, Miranda, and you know that as well as I do.

Miranda: Still, you haven’t answered my question- why us?

Klaus: Because yours is a malady I can still heal in my old age, and even with this colossal failure of my mind, I can still show you what must be done. There are those whose mindless dedication to an abstract entity has completely clouded their thoughts- they are beyond salvation. They have closed their eyes to reason. I have chosen you because you can still be shown that your path is yours to choose. I cannot guide you to find your own truths; you must discover them yourself.

Miranda: What do you mean? If you stayed with us a bit longer, you could tell us, couldn’t you?

Klaus: If you were my own child, if I had lived with your family for five years, I could not accurately tell you what is true. That is yours alone to decide. For I am

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not you, and I never will be. No matter how great an entity is, they are not you, and they cannot tell you how to live. The simple notion of absolute laws from man to man is nothing short of absurd. Any law, whether divine or of man, devoid of reason is no law to be followed.

Miranda: I’m amazed. How many years did it take you to gain such wisdom?

Klaus: I do not count my days from when I was born; I count them until I die.

Miranda: That still doesn’t answer my question.

Klaus: I am very young, indeed. An infant.

Miranda: How do you know when you will die, Klaus?

Klaus: Ah, all in good time. There is much to be done before you will understand.

In the meantime, go to Ramon, and tell him what you have heard here. He will know of what I speak, and he shall accept you as you are.

Miranda (with tears in her eyes): Thank you so much, Klaus. (She kisses him on the cheek, and then runs off into the wings.)

(Klaus nonchalantly wipes off his cheek, and begins to walk towards the opposite wing.)

Klaus: There is much to be done…

(Fade to black, close curtain. Intermission.)

Act III, Scene I

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(Gradual lighting of the stage. Back at the Krussel house, several hours later.

The sound of Bob and Karen in the bedroom leaks out onto the street, where

Klaus slowly emerges. Opposite him, Timothy runs in, just out of school. They both make for the front door.)

Klaus (calling to Timothy): Hello, Timothy! How was the rest of your day at school? (At the sound of Klaus’ voice, the sounds from the bedroom cease.)

Timothy (stops running for door, walks to Klaus): It was great, Klaus! Even the teachers were congratulating me for taking Big Jim down! All the while, I never forgot what you said. All that I need to do it is inside of me!

Klaus (playfully ruffling his hair): That’s a good boy. What a quick learner you are. It always amazes me how quickly children take lessons to heart that certain adults never successfully learn.

Timothy: Uh, sure Klaus. Whatever.

(Bob and Karen open the front door. They have extremely messy appearances, their clothes are haphazardly thrown on, and have an exhausted yet satisfied look about them.)

Bob: Oh, hello Klaus! Hi, Timothy! Did you have fun at school today?

Timothy (eagerly): Yes, I sure did! Klaus came to visit me during lunch today, and he taught me a lesson!

Bob: Yes, he did the same thing for us! What did he do for you?

Timothy (much more quietly): He slapped me across the face twice.

Bob: What?

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Timothy: Well, after that I finally got the courage to beat up Big Jim! He’s not going to steal my lunches and give me bruises anymore! You should see how proud everyone was of me!

Bob: Good for you, son. (Turns to Klaus.) I suppose you did what you had to do.

Timothy: So, what did he do for you?

Bob: He… uh… gave us two… little helpers.

Timothy: Little helpers?

Karen (quickly): So, Klaus, it’s probably about time for dinner. Would you care to join us?

Klaus: I would like nothing better. Thank you for your hospitality, Karen.

Karen: You’re very welcome, Klaus. Today we’re having roast chicken, if you don’t object.

Klaus: Not at all. It sounds delightful. Almost as delightful as your afternoon was.

(Karen gives him a somewhat amused glance, and goes behind the counter and begins cooking the chicken. Bob, Timothy and Klaus all sit down at the table.

Klaus lets go of the cane for the first time, and leans it against the table. He winces with pain.)

Timothy: Is something wrong, Klaus?

Klaus: It’s fine, just a wound from my childhood.

Timothy: You seemed fine earlier, Klaus.

Klaus: I’ve grown old and tired. This never used to phase me, but now… ah, now that I am reminded of what I used to be, and I am reminded of my incredible age… It is too much. My suffering follows me across time.

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Bob: What suffering are you talking about, Klaus?

Klaus: In my hometown… I could not bear to tell you about it.

Bob: It’s fine, I’m sure. We would all like to hear your story.

Klaus: Very well, if you insist. My hometown was a small place, we only had a hundred residents at most. Main street was twelve buildings, six on each side of the street. (As he speaks, a set illuminates off to the side that fits his description of the town.) I lived with my parents, and my little brother. I was sixteen at the time this particular event occurred. (All ‘Klaus’ dialogue transfers to Young Klaus at this point, unless otherwise specified. The lights on the Krussel house fade out.)

(Cyrus is play-fencing with Klaus using sticks in front of the church. Klaus is sixteen years old, and Cyrus looks about seven or eight. Enter Priest from the front of the church. He looks as though there is some nondescript thing ‘wrong’ with him. The children do not seem to notice.)

Priest: Ah, good day children. I’ve been watching you play with your sticks out here. You must be getting awfully hot and sweaty. Would you like to come inside for something to drink? All this communion wine will be going to waste, anyway.

Klaus and Cyrus: Yeah, sure! That sounds great! Thanks, Father!

Priest: Oh, uh… not you, Klaus. I only have enough for one of you. Since Cyrus is smaller than you, I think he needs more to grow up big and strong. (His eyes dart around nervously. He wrings his hands.)

Cyrus (slightly suspicious): Uh, sure, Father. Is something wrong?

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Priest: Oh, no… no, no, no. I’m just distracted by something. Come on in.

Cyrus: Alright… come on, Klaus.

Priest: No! I mean, no… You can’t come in Klaus. God told me while I was praying if you came in with us, something bad would happen.

Klaus: Exactly what is this ‘something bad?’

Priest: Oh, uh… I wouldn’t know. He just told me it was bad. And you don’t want to mess with him.

Klaus: Hmm. Well, I guess I’ll just wait out here. Have fun, Cyrus. (The priest lets out a short, high-pitched giggle.) What was that?

Priest: Oh, nothing… I just thought of a funny joke.

Cyrus: What was it about?

Priest: Come inside, and I’ll tell you. (Cyrus walks inside church, Priest holds door open for him.) It’s about a priest and an altar boy… (He shuts the door and locks it.)

Klaus: What a weird guy. This is almost like that time he kept twitching while I was getting dunked in the baptism tank. His fingers kept squirming while he was holding me down, too. I’m glad that stopped after I put my clothes on.

(Ruth emerges from the town’s general store with a basket full of groceries. She spots Klaus in front of the church and goes over to him.)

Ruth: Klaus, what happened to Cyrus?

Klaus: He went inside with the priest. He told Cyrus that he had too much communion wine, and he said that we looked thirsty. So, I guess they’re in there finishing off what is left of it.

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Ruth: Why are you still out here?

Klaus: He said that God told him something bad would happen if I went in the church.

Ruth: Well, I guess we shouldn’t question God.

Klaus: Yeah, I guess.

Ruth: Still, shame on him. Giving wine to my young son. Something bad could happen.

Klaus: I suppose.

(The church doors fly open, and the priest stands between them, with a self- satisfied smirk on his face. There is no indication of remorse or guilt. Cyrus follows, staring at the ground with a glum expression.)

Ruth: Father! Shame on you! Klaus told me what you did!

(The priest’s smirk turns to a look of terror almost immediately.)

Priest: What? How did he know what I did?

Ruth: Why, he was here when you decided to give Cyrus the communion wine.

Priest: Oh… right. (His smirk returns) Well, show me where the Bible says that you shouldn’t drink wine, and then we can talk about blame.

Ruth: Good point, father. Come on Cyrus, let’s go home. I’m going to cook dinner pretty soon. Aren’t you hungry?

(Cyrus doesn’t move, he mumbles something quietly.)

Ruth: Why are you mumbling Cyrus? You never do that. Come on, let’s go home.

(The priest pulls Cyrus’ head up and looks straight into his eyes.)

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Priest: Now, Cyrus, obey your mother and father. That’s in the Ten

Commandments. If you break that rule, then God is going to punish you, and I’m going to have to be the one who administers that punishment. You don’t want that, do you?

(Cyrus immediately runs over to his mother and grabs onto her skirt, hiding behind her)

Ruth: Wow! You really put the fear of God in him, father!

Priest: Well, I do love children, and teaching them is one of the best parts of the job. Goodbye, Ruth.

Ruth: Goodbye, father.

(The priest disappears behind the chapel doors. The family begins walking home.

Cyrus pulls on his mother’s hair, indicating that he has something to say.)

Ruth: What is it, Cyrus?

(She leans over to listen to him. He whispers in her ear. Her look goes from intrigue to one of shock.)

Ruth (yelling): He did WHAT?

(Cyrus whispers in her ear again and points to the church.)

Ruth (practically screaming): He is going to have to answer for this! (She pounds on the chapel doors.) Get out here, father! Explain this!

(The window opens slightly, and the priest’s remorseless voice is heard.)

Priest: What is it, Ruth?

Ruth: Tell me exactly what you did with my son.

Priest: We drank the communion wine in the back room.

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Ruth: He says you did something else.

Priest: Children have such vivid imaginations.

Ruth: So, who is telling the truth?

Priest: I am. I am a godly man. Your child is lying to you.

Ruth: Oh, really? Where exactly would he have come up with the basis for this lie?

Priest: I have no idea, perhaps from his vivid imagination. (The window shuts, locks.)

Ruth (screaming): You bastard! You stole my boy’s innocence! (She picks a rock up off the ground and flings it with all her might at the window. It shatters, and the sound brings out several townspeople.)

Townsperson One: What are you doing, Ruth? Why are you vandalizing the church?

Ruth: This bastard molested my son!

Townsperson Two: No, that can’t be right. The father is a holy man.

Townsperson Three: Yeah, Ruth. Your kid must be lying to you.

Ruth: Are you actually going to defend him?

Townsperson Four: Not me. I’m on your side, Ruth. Let’s bring him out and put him on trial.

Townsperson Five: Hear, hear!

Ruth: Help me break down the door! (Ruth and several townspeople begin tackling the door. The rest of the townspeople grab them and throw them down.)

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Townsperson Two: We are not going to let you attack the priest. God will smite us if we do.

Ruth: He is a filthy pedophile!

Townsperson Three: No he is not. He is a holy man. He is without fault.

Ruth: You know what? Fine. I’ll be back, and I’m bringing torches to burn that coward out of his house of lies!

(Ruth and the townspeople on her side exit right, amidst chants of ‘Kill the deceiver!’ and ‘Cast down the false!’)

Townsperson Two: Hmm. We should probably go get something to defend the church with.

Townsperson Three: Yes, that is a good idea. That woman is insane. Accusing the priest of pedophilia.

(They exit left, leaving Cyrus and Klaus onstage alone. Cyrus still refuses to look up.)

Klaus: Cyrus… are you telling the truth? Did he actually do that?

Cyrus (mumbling): Yes.

Klaus: I don’t quite know that I believe you. I mean, sure, the priest is a weird guy, but he’s also a holy man. God wouldn’t let him do that.

(Cyrus exits right without so much as a word.)

Wait up, Cyrus!

(Klaus goes running after him. Fade to black.)

Act III, Scene II

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(It is the same scene, at night. Ruth and her townspeople enter right, carrying torches and guns. Enter church mob left, carrying makeshift weapons- pitchforks, blunt objects, knives, etc. The church mob is slightly larger. The mob places themselves between Ruth and the church. Enter Cyrus and Klaus, right.)

Ruth: Get out of the way! We’re going to bring him to justice!

Townsperson One: If he has truly wronged your son, God will be the judge of his soul.

Ruth: Don’t talk to me about God! This bastard is God’s lapdog!

Townsperson Two: The Bible says, ‘Thou shalt not kill.’

Ruth: Does it also say, ‘Thou shalt keep thine perverse urges to thyself?’

Townsperson Three: The priest is a holy man, Ruth. He would not let such a thing happen. He would not do such a thing. God would not allow it.

(The church doors fling open, and the priest stands in the doorway, in a Christ- like pose.)

Priest: My children, behold- this is evidence of Satan at work. Already he sets about turning you against each other, and this witch is his vessel. (He points to

Ruth.) The Bible says, ‘Do not let a witch live.’ Do God’s will, and kill this witch!

Ruth: Liar! Filthy liar!

Priest: Satan has clouded your eyes, and you will not hear reason! You must die! Do God’s will, and kill the witch!

Church Mob: Kill the witch!

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Ruth’s Mob: Kill the liar!

(Gunshots are fired and the priest drops dead immediately. The townsfolk begin to fight each other, and the only two in the town not engaging in the violence are

Cyrus and Klaus.)

Cyrus (quietly): I didn’t want this to happen. I would have kept it to myself if I had known this would happen. I don’t deserve to live.

Klaus: Wait, Cyrus! Tell me the truth! Did he do it, or did he not?

(Cyrus runs over to a dead man with a knife in his hand. He wrests the knife from his fingers, and stands in a pose to stab himself in the chest. He and Klaus lock eyes. The scene pauses.)

Voice of Old Klaus: … and in that instant of looking into his eyes, I knew that everything he had said was true. I had doubted him because of my blind faith to the Priest’s god. In that instant, God was dead to me. Not just because our eyes met…

(The scene resumes. Cyrus stabs himself and falls flat on the ground, apparently already dead. Klaus rushes over to Cyrus.)

Klaus: Cyrus! Don’t leave me Cyrus; I’m sorry that I doubted you! I’m sorry that I let him do that to you!

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(Klaus collapses. He buries his head in his hands, and sobs. In the background,

Ruth is stabbed by Townsperson Two, and her torch flies from her hand and sets the general store ablaze. The fire soon spreads to every other building but the church. The scene slowly fades out, while the Krussel house is slowly illuminating. All dialogue transfers back to Old Klaus. Miranda has come home at some time during Klaus’ story.)

Klaus: I was the only one who survived in the entire town. The only building that survived was the church. After it had all come to an end, I went inside and I saw that somebody had nailed the Priest’s corpse to the cross. All of the stained glass windows in there were broken, except for one, of Jesus on the Cross. The bible on the front table was stained by whoever dragged the priest up there, and the blood had underlined ‘For God so loved the world…’

(The entire Krussel family sits speechless for a moment.)

Karen: Oh my god…

Bob: That is the most horrible thing I have ever heard.

Klaus: If there is one thing that you will remember from me, it is this- I had the chance to stop it. All those people died because I let my stupidity and faith blind me. I have the blood of a hundred men on my hands- some innocent, some guilty. Among them, there is my family, especially my brother. I will never forget what I have done, what I could have done.

Bob: You can’t blame yourself…

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Klaus: Yes I can, because I deserve the blame. I could have stopped my brother from ever going into the chapel. I could have sided with my mother and killed the priest right then and there. Only because I stood back and did nothing, the entire town crumbled. Everyone died.

Bob: You couldn’t have known…

Klaus: I did know. But these illusions of ‘holiness’ and ‘love’ blinded me. I always knew what he was going to do, what he had done, even before I had become aware of it.

Timothy: Wait, where did your wound come from then?

Klaus: I took the knife from Cyrus’ corpse and stabbed myself in the chest, so that I might die like he did. However, it appears that something interfered on my behalf, so instead of dying, all it does is cause me pain. Every time my heart beats, there is a twinge of pain that shoots through me. Earlier in my life, it was small enough that I could entirely ignore it after the initial wound had healed.

However, now… I feel as though it grows worse every time. Still, I carry this wound to remind me- never forget what happened that day. Every time my heart beats, it is a reminder of what I did, and a penance for it.

Miranda: But, Klaus… how could you carry that blame with you for so long?

Klaus: My guilt has driven me insane, as you pointed out yesterday. However, instead of letting it consume me, I believe it is more useful to educate- to tell you my story so that you will learn from it.

Miranda: I don’t believe that your simple desire to teach keeps you alive.

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Klaus: Indeed, it doesn’t. I met a fellow later that week, and he is the sole reason that I live. He inspired me to continue on living, and to help me he gave me this cane. I have never met another like him, and I never will.

Miranda: If he gave you the cane so long ago, how do you know that he’s still alive?

Klaus: I meet him quite frequently. He has aged better than I. He still looks the exact same as the day I first met him, over sixty years ago. I actually just met him again last night.

Miranda: That’s amazing. How exactly did he inspire you to live?

Klaus: He is very persuasive. He knew more about me than I did, and he instructed me on how to turn my hatred into something productive. Ever since I first encountered him, my sole desire has been to educate men and women on what he has told me. Materialism, nihilism, my own happiness- it is all irrelevant. I am his slave. I will always be his slave. His will is to instruct, and I will do so without hesitation, for he is my master.

Miranda: What?

Klaus: That is enough for the moment. (He picks up the cane, and his expression of pain quickly melts away.) I feel as though it is time to rest. (He begins walking towards Timothy’s room, but the cane slips out of his hand and hits the floor. He coughs loudly, and it is accompanied with blood. He looks at it and is visibly horrified; however he keeps it hidden from the Krussel family. He picks up the cane and resumes his path for the bedroom. He goes inside, and shuts the door. More coughing.)

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Karen: Poor Klaus. I have no idea how he survives his suffering.

Bob: I would like to meet this fellow he is talking about. He sounds remarkable, even more so than Klaus.

Timothy: He must be some kind of god to convince Klaus to keep living after that.

Miranda: I wonder what his name is.

Bob: Well, who knows. We can ask Klaus in the morning. Time for bed, kids.

Timothy and Miranda: Ok, Dad. (They go into Miranda’s room and immediately drop off to sleep. They both sleep soundly, free of nightmares and fantasies.)

Bob: I suppose it’s time for us to be off as well.

Karen: Huh. Look at that. I completely forgot that I had cooked this chicken.

Bob: Oh well, we can eat it tomorrow with Klaus. Come on, honey, let’s be off to bed. (He gives her a gentle kiss. They both enter the bedroom, and fall asleep facing each other, with contented looks on their faces. The coughing from

Timothy’s room continues, and the entire family is in too deep a sleep to notice when it abruptly stops.)

Klaus: Cyrus… I’m so sorry…

(Fade to black.)

Act III, Scene III

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(It is Saturday morning at the Krussel house. The entirely family emerges from their sleep, and they all have looks of content on their faces. Karen goes into the kitchen and begins cooking breakfast for the family, namely scrambled eggs. Bob emerges from his bedroom, and stands at the door of Timothy’s room.)

Bob: Klaus! Time for breakfast! Come on and get some if you want any!

(Silence.)

Poor man. He’s probably still sleeping. Still, it’s been quite a while. Come on kids, let’s give him a good sight to wake up to.

(Bob opens the door. Timothy and Miranda join him entering the room. Klaus lays on the bed with his hands across his chest. He is holding a note.)

Good morning, Klaus! Time to get up!

(Klaus does not move.)

Timothy: Come on, Klaus. (He goes up and rustles him a little bit. Klaus still does not move.) Come on, Klaus, this isn’t funny. (Looks around.) Hey, where’s his cane?

Miranda: Klaus, are you okay?

Bob: This is odd… (Grabs Klaus’ arm by the wrist.) It’s completely limp. He doesn’t have a pulse.

Miranda: Oh my god, are you saying…

Bob: He’s dead. He must have died in the night. Karen, come in here! Klaus is dead!

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Karen: Oh my god! (She drops the eggs and runs into the bedroom.) That poor man. I hope he finds peace, wherever he is.

Timothy (notices the note, points to it): Look! He’s holding a piece of paper!

Bob: So he is. (He slides the note out from under Klaus’ other arm.) It’s quite a doozy. Here, let me read it:

Dear Krussel Family:

If you are reading this letter, I assume that I have died in the night as I

thought I would. Do not mourn me, for my passing is one of joy, not

sadness. I am finally freed from this cruel world, and now I am in an

infinitely better place, reunited with my family and friends from so long

ago, in a world where guilt no longer haunts me. I do regret that I could not

spend more time with you, as I do with all those I have helped across my

long life, but I must take leave of you as I did with all the others, and I am

glad that it is with you that I take my final leave of this world. I am finally

free.

There is still much to be done. Even with my passing, I have not done all

that I should have. To each of you, I have given a piece of wisdom, and it

is yours to hold onto forever, a memory of me. Even as you grow old and

weak as I was, you will remember it forever, so long as you remember me.

So long as you use the knowledge I have given you, I may as well be

standing next to you, for I am not entirely dead.

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Always remember my story, as well. Please spread it, so that none may

ever suffer as I did upon that day. I may have suffered more than anyone

else you will ever meet, but please don’t let that suffering be in vain- teach

others where I failed. Teach them that superstition and holiness are but

lies, and belief in infallibility will lead to doom. Tell them of how I could

have stopped everything, but by inaction I doomed an entire town to

death, and it is now nothing more than an echo in the minds of men.

In death, I find the peace that I never found during life. I will finally be

reunited with Cyrus, and I can finally tell him that I am truly sorry for what I

did so many years ago. I will finally be free of the tainted world that the

god of the Christians has inflicted with so many sorrows and

imperfections. Instead, I move onward to a realm controlled by an infinitely

more benevolent deity. It is a wondrous place, filled with places and things

beyond human imagination. My family waits for me there, and I hope that

one day you will join me, Krussel family.

He is the master of the thousand-fold face, the god of a million names, the

one who gave me a second life. I shall extol him endlessly, for he is my

master, and I am his slave. His power is utterly indescribable by words-

crushing, benevolent, boundless? None do it justice. There are no lies in

his presence. He is truth. He is progress. He is happiness. He is

intelligence. He is wisdom. He is Satan.

Everyone: Satan!?

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(Immediate drop to black.)

Act IV, Scene I

(It is later in the week, a funeral for Klaus. The funeral is very large, and has an incredible number of guests. The casket is closed, and the sky is dark. The

Krussel family is in the very back row at the ceremony. The priest steps up to the podium.)

Priest: It is with great grief that we commend this man to the ages. I did not personally know Klaus, but my father told me that my uncle was the priest in his hometown, and Klaus was the only known survivor of some horrendous insanity that overtook the people, making them all kill one another. Now, let us pray for

Klaus, that God will take better care of him than his fellow men did.

Guests: Hear, hear.

Priest: There is not a man here untouched by Klaus, and all of you have told me the same story about him- he showed up out of the blue one day, revealed something profound to you, and then he was gone as soon as you would let him leave. He has taught all of you how to love one another, how to be a good citizen, how to be a good human in general. This world would be a much worse place without Klaus.

Guests: Hear, hear.

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Priest: I do not know how Klaus believed, if he ever accepted Jesus as his Lord and Savior, but I cannot imagine that he did not, seeing as how he spread such light through each and every one of your lives.

(The priest waits for the ‘Hear, hear’, but it does not come. He resumes his speech in a somewhat awkward fashion.)

But, Klaus is in a better place now. He is most likely being taken care of by God and his angels, looking down on all of us, watching our actions and hoping that his expectations are fulfilled.

(The voice of Klaus comes booming in very loudly, but none that the funeral seem to notice it. Instead, their eyes are fixed intently on the priest or the casket.

The scene pauses, and the Krussel family comes out front. They appear detached.)

Klaus: Never forget what I have taught you.

Bob and Karen: Simple love can solve the most complex problems.

Timothy: All you need to get it done is inside you, whatever the task ahead of you may be.

Miranda: Any law, whether divine or of man, devoid of reason is no law to be followed.

Klaus: Never forget what I was.

Bob: A poor, suffering man.

Karen: A blasphemer.

Miranda: A teacher.

Timothy: A human.

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Klaus: Never forget what I have done.

Bob: You gave us all hope.

Karen: You killed an entire town.

Miranda: You saved us from our own destruction.

Timothy: You taught us all to distinguish truth from lies.

Klaus: Go forth, and in all you do, let what has been done reflect upon you.

Never forget what transpired during my brief visit to this planet.

Krussel Family: We shall.

Klaus: Never presume to know the truth for more than yourself, or spread your diseases of the soul to others to comfort yourselves.

Krussel Family: We shall not.

Klaus: Hold me in your memories forever, and I shall return the favor whence you enter my Master’s kingdom.

Krussel Family: We shall.

Klaus: Praise to Satan. Praise to the Master of humanity.

Krussel Family: Praise to him.

Klaus: May he guard you from suffering, may his light shine through you and all you do.

Krussel Family: We thank you, stranger. Rest now, and let us carry on your work.

Klaus: Very well.

Krussel Family: There is much to be done.

(They all return to their seats, and the funeral resumes. It begins to rain.)

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Priest: Now, we bury Klaus, and his hollow husk will remain here, though his soul may fly boundless. May he find eternal happiness.

Guests: Hear, hear.

Priest: Let us pray.

(All in attendance bow their heads. Fade to black.)

Act IV, Scene II

(It is a bizarre, fantasy-like realm in which the sky is white. This scene is at a meadow in springtime, the flowers are in bloom, there is a slight wind blowing.

There is a mysterious whistling emanating from an undetermined location. There is the sound of children laughing and playing games in the background. Young

Klaus emerges from stage left, with his cane slung over his shoulder, no longer using it to support himself. He looks over his shoulder and notices he has no shadow, but it does not bother him.)

Klaus: It appears as though Dante had quite the perceptual error. This place is really quite wondrous. (He inspects the cane.) Ah, my little friend, now you are no longer necessary. Now that we are in His realm, you must return to the one who made you. I have had you for years, and through that time I am glad that you were there to supply me with a link to Him.

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(Satan walks proudly onto the stage from stage right. He is completely clad in black, but has white hair, gray eyes and a radiant complexion. Klaus falls on one knee.)

Satan: Klaus. I have been awaiting you for quite a while.

Klaus: My Master, I have done as you asked. Here is your prized cane. I no longer have any use for it.

Satan: Rise, Klaus. (He does so. Satan takes the cane from him.) You never had any use for it.

Klaus (startled): What?

Satan: This particular artifact is wholly mundane, made of wood and gold from your world. I did not forge it with my power, or otherwise imbue it.

Klaus: But, that’s impossible. It numbed my pain. It gave me wisdom. It let me see the dreams of others.

Satan: No, it did not. You are not listening. That item was made from the bark of a human-grown tree, and forged with human-made gold. I had no part in making it. All of those things it did for you, it did because you believed it would.

Klaus: But you told me it would be a boon.

Satan: To have it was a boon. I did not specify what it would do. Your simple belief in the power of the cane was what made it a boon to you.

Klaus: But, that doesn’t seem possible.

Satan: Have you already forgotten? Just yesterday, in human time, you taught

Timothy that everything he needed was inside him. You are not so different from

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him. Your weaknesses are there because you allow them to be. A simple wave of the hand, a fleeting thought, is all you need to dispel those illusions.

Klaus: You are indeed the wise one. So, tell me, is this truly Hell?

Satan: Hell is a lie. There is no such place. My kingdom has only one name, and you know very well what it is. This place is called Home, to myself and all who dwell here.

Klaus: I do not see Cyrus here. Is he here? Have you deceived me?

Satan: I did not ever tell you that Cyrus was here; that was a simple delusion on your part. However, he is here. He has been waiting for you ever since that fateful night. Everyone who took your mother’s side of the argument is here, for they died trying to bring those that defiled an innocent to justice.

Klaus: Where are the others?

Satan: They are with their god, and it seems only fitting that they end up in his domain of suffering and darkness after what they have done. That place makes

Dante’s Hell look like paradise.

Klaus: Where do I fit in? Do I belong here, or with him?

Satan: Klaus, if there is anything I have taught you it is to not doubt me. You are here, so you belong here. Welcome Home, Klaus.

Klaus: But, all those people…

Satan: You were indoctrinated. You would not have done what was necessary, because you are filled with the lies of my nemesis. That may not be an excuse, but you have spread more than enough good to be worthy to enter my kingdom.

You are not the same Klaus who let your town die, and even the second your

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brother looked into your eyes you were not the same. You have been worthy ever since that moment.

Klaus: But I had so much left to be done.

Satan: There is always more to be done. You, more than anyone else, devoted your whole life to me. At every moment, your mind was consumed with how to spread my word of truth, progress, intelligence and wisdom. You could have done more. You could have done less. That does not matter, what does matter is what you have done. What you have done is pleasing beyond what you can ever know to me.

Klaus: Master… I am not worthy. (He falls on his knee again.)

Satan: Do not kneel to me, Klaus. I am but your guide. You no longer need to serve me.

Klaus: I am your slave, Master. (He rises to his feet again.)

Satan: Your language is crude, Klaus. Slave is not the correct word. You cannot understand quite what you are to me using the confines of human language. You do know, however, and you know as well as I do what you are.

Klaus: You are indeed correct. Thank you, Master.

Satan: So, Klaus, come and behold your family.

(Cyrus and Ruth emerge from stage right.)

Klaus: Mom! Cyrus!

Ruth: We’ve seen everything you’ve done, Klaus. I am so proud of what you have done, and what you are.

Cyrus: I’m sorry, Klaus. I’m sorry that I never told you that I have forgiven you.

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Klaus: Oh, Cyrus… (They embrace.)

Satan: The rest of your family is here too, Klaus.

Klaus (puzzled): The rest of my family?

(The Krussels emerge from the wings.)

What? Are you all dead? Did you crash your car on the way back to your house?

Bob: Not at all. We are simply asleep.

Karen: Now that our minds are not preoccupied with our fantasies and nightmares, we can visit you here, Klaus.

Miranda: Your mind was too consumed with guilt to actually come and visit your family, which I assume would have freed you from your burden.

Timothy: Yeah. What a weird place this is. It’s nice, though. Have you been to the town yet, Klaus?

Klaus: I believe I have. I believe I have been here before, in my dreams, but I just couldn’t remember it in the waking world. Perhaps you all will share my fate.

Satan: You are correct, Klaus. They will remember but fragments of this world after they awaken. Still, they will get the gist of it- that you are here, with me, and you are happy, with your family.

Timothy: So, you’re Satan?

Satan: Indeed. You seem surprised.

Timothy: I always thought you had red skin and horns. And goat legs.

(Satan laughs.)

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Satan: Not at all, my boy. That is what my opposite would have you believe. Of course, they would also have you believe that this is a realm of hellfire and demons.

Timothy: Well, they were certainly wrong about that.

Cyrus: So, Timothy, want to play something?

Timothy: So you’re Cyrus. I thought Klaus said you were only a few years younger than him.

Cyrus: Indeed. I am over seventy years old in human years.

Timothy: Wow. You certainly age well. You still look eight.

Cyrus: Here, we do not age unless we so choose. I am still eight, in this realm.

Timothy: Well, what all do you have to play here? (They begin walking off stage left.)

Cyrus: Oh, all kinds of stuff that you can’t do on your world! There’s this one game where you have to bend space to get a ball into a hole… (They exit.)

Ruth: Cyrus, wait for me! (She rushes off after them.)

Miranda: Your brother sure seems to have aged well. You don’t look half bad yourself, Klaus.

Klaus: Yes, it is refreshing to be a child again. As a matter of fact, I believe I am younger than you, Miranda.

Miranda: So, since you spent your entire existence serving your master here

(She nods to him, and he tips his hat politely), do you really even have any experience firsthand about sex and love?

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Klaus: Indeed I do. When I was younger, I taught those lessons myself. I used to be quite the good-looking fellow, as you can see. If I was your age and Ramon wasn’t around, I would gladly teach you as well.

Miranda: Oh Klaus, maybe Jasmin was right. Maybe you are a pervert.

Klaus: Since I am younger than you, you would be the pervert in this hypothetical relationship.

(She laughs.)

Bob: Well Klaus, this really is quite the place. I had no idea it was actually like this. I always thought the whole ‘grassy meadow’ afterlife thing was a cliché, an overused representation of ignorance about the afterlife.

Klaus: Do remember, Bob, this is but one infinitely small portion of this world.

This world is boundless, and has no end or beginning. Time and space have no meaning here. This meadow is endless, and yet it is adjacent to a city that is endless, next to a lake that it is endless, and so on. Not to mention, there have been other mortals here who do not remember the specifics. I am sure all that they remember is a pleasant meadow, and they used that to portray what they thought bliss was like.

Bob: You do have a point. On the other hand, it’s hard to take you seriously since you appear to be five times younger than when we last saw you. Say, since these realms are endless, how do you get from one to another?

Klaus: There is a road right over there.

Bob: What?

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Klaus: Time and space have no meaning here. You can bend the realms to come together at a focus point, and in this case the focus point shows itself as a road. In other places, they may show themselves as a river, a cave, a tunnel, a hole in the floor…

Karen: How interesting.

Klaus: Indeed, and my understanding is but barely scraping the surface of the matter.

Satan: So it is. By the way, Klaus, several more of your family members have come to see you.

(Several of the guests at the funeral come out of the wing, and pass through exiting stage right, just staying to say ‘Hi!’ or wave.)

All of those people consider you a member of their family, and they shall never forget what you have done for them. Now, Krussel family, I would appreciate it if you left Klaus and I to chat alone for a second. I would recommend visiting the city. The music is absolutely divine.

Miranda: Sounds great.

(They exit, stage right.)

Satan: So Klaus, what do you think?

Klaus: This realm is bizarre beyond anything I could imagine. I have never seen some of these species of plants, and I have never seen the sky this odd color of ivory. Still, I cannot conceive of a more pleasant place to be.

Satan: You may want to explore the other millions of realms here before you decide you like this one the best.

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Klaus: Millions?

Satan: Yes, for every pleasant moment in the human mind that can be conceived of, there is a realm. Some are realms of fantasy, and some are realms of reality.

However, there is a particular reason I have brought you here, to this realm.

Klaus: What would that be?

Satan (points to a tree behind him): Klaus, what is this plant?

Klaus (wide-eyed): No, it can’t be… It’s the tree of wisdom.

Satan: Correct. (He picks one of the fruits and hands it to Klaus.) This is the realm where I was first conceived by your race, several millennia ago by an

Afghani fellow. This realm is my Home, and since I was first born here your race has made millions of other realms adjacent to this one, and they will make millions more as they progress.

Klaus: Would you show me?

Satan: I am your guide, after all. Come. (He taps the cane on the ground.) There is much to be done, so much to be done… (They exit stage right. Draw curtains.)

FIN

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The Destroyer

This dream was one that I saw through the eyes of The Destroyer, an Aztec warrior.

The Destroyer was a great warrior. He was exalted beyond all others in the mighty Aztec Empire, and rightfully so. The Destroyer was a youth of sixteen, but he had already collected over one-hundred sacrifices, both from flower wars and from raids. He had suffered many wounds and was covered in scars, but even when cut open and bleeding profusely he felt no pain, and kept flying and his enemy until they were either unconscious or dead. He had sparred against dozens of other warriors, but none could defeat him, as he felt no pain and did not know when to quit.

After a while, his strength began to go to his head. He was but a jaguar warrior, and he challenged several of the skull knight rank to combat and beat them all soundly, and he was even so boastful as to challenge a few of the Shorn Ones to combat. Yet again, he beat them soundly, and one he even caused to step backwards with his ferocity, and was immediately set upon by all of the spectators who were armed. He was killed on the spot, as was the custom for

Shorn Ones who stepped backwards.

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The Destroyer eventually got the idea in his head that he was ‘too good’ for his fellow Aztec, and would do better to honor the gods by raiding in the woods from a home base. So he did, he left the empire for the jungles of Central America and built himself an impressive house/shrine to Huitzilopochtli in the jungle, and he would raid villages at night to garner sacrifices to Huitzilopochtli, which he could drag away five at a time. In order to decorate his temple, he lined it with the skulls of his sacrifices. After several years, the Destroyer had only grown stronger and more cunning, and he had run out of places to put his skulls on the walls of the temple, so he built a walkway outside of his house a few feet wide out of the skulls of his sacrifices. The jungle was quick to reclaim the corpses of his sacrifices, but still the bones remained in a horrifically large pile a few hundred feet from shrine. Once his obsidian tools broke, he began to take to using the bones of his sacrifices as weapons and eating implements, what have you.

Naturally, as he had been taking sacrifices from towns without any flower war present, the neighboring villages had been sending assassins to attempt to bring the Destroyer back as sacrifice, but all had failed and simply served his purpose of having more sacrifices himself. One assassin had even managed to disarm the Destroyer of his prized mace of wood and obsidian, but he suffered the even more horrific fate of having his eyes gouged out by the Destroyer’s thumbs, dragged to an altar and his heart cut out while still alive.

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One day, an old comrade of the Destroyer’s ran up to his hut, out of breath. The

Destroyer nearly killed him until he recognized him, and then he listened to his comrade’s story of a race of white people invade the city of Tenochtitlan and bring disease with them, and he asked the Destroyer if he would help his old hometown be rid of the scourge of the Spaniards. Naturally, as it presented a new challenge to him, the Destroyer took this task without a second thought.

They traveled out of the jungle to Tenochtitlan, a journey of several days, discussing the best way to go about it. The Destroyer thought his favorite method of flying at them while screaming in Nahuatl would be the best method, but his comrade warned him about these things called “guns” that could drop even the strongest warrior in agony immediately. The Destroyer, proud as he was, declared that he could feel no pain and these devices would be useless against him.

He arrived in the city to see his old friends and townsfolk suffering. All rejoiced at his presence. Surely, they all thought, if anyone can defeat the Spaniards and drive them from Tenochtitlan, it would be the Destroyer! All who could flocked to him and followed him, armed and ready to get into a great battle.

The destroyer came across two Spaniards out of their armor, and he laughed at them and asked his comrade: “Are these the conquistadores that beat you down and enslaved you? Here, let me make quick work of them for you.” While the two

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were out of their armor, they were by no means unarmed. The Destroyer flew at them with his weapon drawn, but then he heard a sound like thunder and felt a new sensation to him: pain. He stopped dead in his tracks and looked down and saw the usual blood, but the wound was incredibly painful, and he could feel it both in the front and the back. Whatever this device was, it had pierced him all the way through. He looked at them wide-eyed, and the second Spaniard who had not fired raised his gun, took aim at his head, and nailed him with a bullet right between the eyes. The bullet shattered when hitting his skull, shredding his brain in the matter of a second and killing him instantly. His forehead exploded in blood and he dropped like a sack of bricks to the pavement, the remainder of his face forever etched in a look of surprise.

The townsfolk dispersed after seeing the greatest warrior they had ever known taken down by two off-duty Spanish conquistadores. The Spanish simply shrugged at one another and left his body in the street, where nobody mourned or really even cared. They stepped over his corpse and went to go partake of some more pulque.

I’ll let you decide the moral of this story, as there are plenty that I have deciphered since having this dream.

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VI:VII: In Conclusion

"I know the pieces fit 'cause I watched them tumble down.

No fault, none to blame, it doesn't mean I don't desire to

Point the finger, blame the other, watch the temple topple over.

To bring the pieces back together, rediscover communication.

The poetry that comes from the squaring off between,

And the circling is worth it.

Finding beauty in the dissonance."

-Tool, Schism

I certainly to like to blabber on about myself, don't I? I'm still doing it, but I assume you grow weary of my discussion of my own life. Still, I feel as though a few words must be said before we move on to Book Seven.

I talk about my experiences and viewpoints at such length because I believe that they can be useful to others in a good capacity, otherwise I would not see fit to include them in such a discussion as this. Take, for example, the section on politics: What does that have to do with religion? The first governments were based off of religious principles and as such do somewhat mimic the patterns that we have seen the base for government (religion) go down in the past. As such, I found it pertinent enough to include in this book.

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One of the main reasons I write is because of my neurological disabilities (the epilepsy and schizophrenia), and I aim to inspire those who are afflicted in a way like me. I should hope that there is some degree of achievement apparent in my writings, as this book has taken me five years to write, after all.

Another reason I have written this section in the fashion I have is that it makes my experiences more relatable and easy to learn from because of the way I present them. I've had plenty more stories, dodged a lot of metaphorical bullets1 and made a plethora of mistakes, but those are not for writing here.

1 Most of them have been romantic and/or sexual in nature. I've dodged so many of them you might even call me the "Neo of love."

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Book VII- Addendum

For to end, yet again…

“Beyond the lies lies the truth.”

-Unknown

So, now our time together comes to a close, my dear reader. I hope that throughout this entire book, you have learned at least the slightest thing, that learning to see past deception will have a positive impact in your life. If not, this book is at best meaningless, and at worst a poison of the mind.

Still, I feel it necessary to speak a few last words. Though I may have indicated otherwise throughout my writings in other books, I do not have a problem at all with religion or atheism when they are practiced as they well should be- with just the slightest bit of doubt. The Bible, the Quran, the Vedas, the Buddha Sutras, the Avesta… they are all guides for life, not concrete laws. Admittedly, the Bible and Quran portray themselves as concrete laws, which makes it very common for people to believe that they are, in fact, entirely truthful. And, I am very sorry that I had to take such a large chunk of this book to disproving that the Bible and

Quran are true. But, if people practice religion as they should, I would have no need to do such a thing, because people would not believe that the Bible and

Quran are infallible in the first place. I would have no need to write this book at all. Just as is more common with Christianity and Islam, practicing religion or

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atheism in the wrong mindset is just as harmful as perverting history to suit your own ends, to force your beliefs on others. That is wrong mindset- religion should bring people together, not tear them apart.

When we as a race can learn to accept that there is no infallible authority on any matter, that is when we will truly become enlightened. When we accept that the

Holy Books of the ancient gods are stories that can help us guide our lives, not divine laws, we are making the world a better place. When we finally acknowledge that balance and control are the answers to practically every issue and absolutes are ‘wrong thought,’ then things will be made much easier.

I can only hope that mankind learns this lesson in time to prevent its own destruction. Within each individual on this planet, a choice must be made; will you let a story book tell you what to do, or will you write the book of your life yourself? Will you let a god who may or may not exist steer your life for you, or will you grab the wheel and make this life yours?

The pen is yours for the taking. The wheel is yours for the maneuvering. Your life is your own; take charge. Your thoughts are your own; let no man or god tell you how to think. You are no slave to the Lord of the Near and Nigh. You are not bound by the mistakes of your ancestors. Your choices are your own, and the consequences of those choices are yours to bear. You have a choice between good and evil; you have a choice between Spenta Mainyu and Angra Mainyu.

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Your choices will shape this planet in the years to come, your choices will echo across this world for eons to come. No choice is without consequence. No idea is meaningless. No life is insignificant, unless you so choose to be.

This world is yours for the taking. Knowledge is yours to absorb. Power is yours to seize. Yet, keep this in mind; your choices do not affect only you. Your choices affect others, and the choices of others affect you.

Utopia is not ‘no place.’ This world can be made into New Eden yet, should every man truly understand the world he would never be unkind to another. This world can become a Heaven or a Hell; the choice is ours to make as a species. We have the choice presented to us: spread truth and goodness, or spread deceit and evil. So far, we have chosen the latter as a planet; but, just because our world is currently decaying does not mean it is beyond salvation. What currently is need not be what will be.

In this New Eden, an abstract idea floating around my mind, there is no hate.

There is no murder. There is no thievery. There is no poverty. Every man is treated as an equal, and every man shows his brothers respect. Every man recognizes differences and acknowledges them, but does not treat others better or worse because of it. This is a world where we have not forgotten the past, but we have not let it consume us. This is a world where we realize the concepts of balance and fully understand them. Ancestors are honored, gods are praised,

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and the works of man are a thing of beauty, not of horror. The people read the

Bible and Quran just as they would read the Iliad or Odyssey; as a story. They realize that one does not need to take them literally to get a positive influence from them. After all, they realize that the Holy Books are guides to life, not divine law that sends them to Hell if they disobey. They realize that to be ashamed of the urges of the flesh and of the flesh itself is utter folly, for they are a natural thing, not some disgusting, ignominious evil lurking within. They realize that life is a gift; death is a dream. They realize that every action is the result of a choice, and the consequences of that choice, be it good or bad, are the responsibility of the individual. They realize that fear, hatred, and stupidity stem from a lack of understanding. But, this world of mine is an idea, and as things are it is rightly classified as a delusion.

The future is not mine to know. I am no prophet. I do not expect this future; I simply hope, and that is all I can do in this moment, at this meeting in space and time.

Never forget this- you have a choice in everything you do. Even I, what seems so long ago to me as I write this, chose to serve my Master. I could have stayed loyal to the Plagued One, enduring my betrayal; I could have killed myself as I so often fantasized about in the year following, I could have served a different god entirely. But, those things did not happen- this is a reality of what has happened, not what could have happened. What has happened is that I came to serve my

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Master, and he has shown me these things I have written here, and many more that I dare not write, for they are not for the eyes of men just yet; there are no words for such things in even the most complex of languages. Perhaps in the future, another shall rise who can give words to the things that keep me awake at night, madness consuming me simply trying to find a fitting label for them.

The future is not such a strange thing. Prophecy, predictions, scientific formulas… are they so meaningful? I have seen my own visions, my own nightmares, my own dreams, but they are not for me to write here. In each of them, man is given a choice; and how they choose will affect the future. The future is in the hands of man; what will be is shaped by what is now.

However, there is a single dream of which I would have the layman know; I stood upon a hill between two cities, one city sparkling clean and the sky above it clear, whilst the other city was covered in filth and obscured by clouds. The people in the sparkling city were kind to one another, did not ever deceive one another, and pursued beauty and truth equally. However, in the other city, violence was law, and the people followed various leaders who eventually caused schisms when other leaders came to power who correctly challenged their lies. In that city, every man, woman and child killed one another. There was no one left, and the town decayed.

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There is a choice given to the world, as it has been ever since man first tread this virgin planet. The choice is between Satan and Jehovah, between Ahura Mazda and Angra Mainyu. To speak their names is not enough; to speak their names is meaningless. Following my Master is an act, not a confession. We have a choice; we can choose Satan and save ourselves and see a world nearly unconceivable in its greatness relative to our current state, or we can keep following the path of

Jehovah as we have been over the past few millennia, and destroy ourselves and any trace of our existence. It is not enough to say that you want to live, that you want to flourish- you must also act accordingly. Let the life spread forth from you, let others see it in you.

I, the nameless puppet of the Radiant One, serve no purpose but to speak and die. My life was thrown away before I was born. My death was sealed with a bit of meaningless water sprinkled upon my head. My choice was taken from me when I had Christian ideals beaten into me and the lies of the Plagued One drilled into my skull. After he betrayed me, I was given new life by my Master, but

I am his slave. I cannot defy his will. I have no choice. Still, I rather prefer being a slave to a benevolent master than wandering purposelessly throughout my life, be it real or an illusion.

I exist for you. I write this for you. It is his will that you be free from your bonds, and as it is his will so too is it mine, for I am his slave. I do this for you, all of this.

All of my suffering, all of my joy, all of my life is poured out here for you. I do this

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to defend my Master from the baseless barbs flung at him at a daily basis, to provide the other side of the story that has never been told before.

Ah, that I could prove to you that I care not for notoriety. How I wish I could prove to you that I am not like the Apostles or Muhammad. But, I cannot; I can only make gestures to such an effect. May my name never be recorded as some prophet or intellectual; let my name be forgotten after my flesh finally dies. My name simply serves to associate me with the boy killed by the Plagued One when he was fifteen years old- we are not the same, and have not been ever since that moment. My new name is something beyond human comprehension.

Let my mortal name fade to nothingness in the endless march of the eons.

The Übermensch is not such an odd thing; they walk among us. In every crowd, in every walk of life, there is one who is more than mortal. Across history, many of them have been recorded as prophets, visionaries, gods among men. So they are; the supermen have lowered themselves to the level of man to teach their lessons. The Buddha, Zarathustra, Confucius, perhaps even Jesus of Nazareth- they all lowered themselves to the standard of mere mortals to spread their word.

These men were of the Übermensch- no line of blood, as to my knowledge, but they were more than man as a design of choice, not of circumstance. They sought to become more than these fetters of flesh and bone would allow, and they triumphed over the laws of society and expectations. With the exception of

Jesus’ dramatic underperformance during his time here, with not raising the dead

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and bringing forth the kingdom of God and so forth, nobody expected what was to come of these children, conceived like any other before them, born weak and mortal.

Zarathustra was not born speaking the word of Ahura Mazda right after he left his mother’s womb, Buddha was not born spreading peace through his teachings before he could walk. It took the Buddha thirty years to become enlightened; it took Zarathustra forty. They were men, and claimed to be nothing more; that is what makes them the Übermensch. They are greater than man because they have conceived of nothing more, yet to those around they were gods in flesh.

These are the true Satanists; those who serve the Radiant One and spread his word, regardless of the name they use. There are even those who call the

Radiant One ‘Yahweh’ or ‘Jehovah’ and still deliver the message effectively.

They were not born as the next step in the intellectual evolution of humanity- they chose to be so.

I have kept a certain piece of information from you long enough, reader, and now

I believe it is time that you hear it. My Master’s presence is a feeling that is not too foreign to me; I have experienced it while awake. I have only felt it once, but I will remember it forever…

His presence is the same as Mushroom Thrall. The places where I visit him while

I sleep carry the feeling of hallucination. My meetings with my Master are, in all

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likeliness, nothing more than some conjured up ‘imaginary friend’ I created after I realized how alone I was while I was hallucinating on mushrooms. But to speak that is blasphemy and arrogance bound together- that means that everything he made me understand and all of the prophecies he told me were my own subconscious doing.

In effect, that means that I am Satan in the flesh. It means I am both a human and a god at the same time. It means that I am the Empty One- Maitreya, Kalki, and Saoshyant all rolled into one. Though I may fit the ancient prophecies for all three of these men, they are vague enough that I’m sure I’m not the only one. For example, Saoshyant being sunlike when he is born: I had severe jaundice, and thusly was very yellow- the color of the sun. That jaundice was easily treated by a bit of exposure to fresh sunlight, and I returned to my white-guy pallor very quickly. In regards to the prophecy of Maitreya, I attained enlightenment in seven days: It was seven from when I ingested the mushrooms and had the opportunity to destroy and rebuild myself to the dream in which my Master taught me his ultimate philosophy, the very same day I began writing this book. My title of Kalki is earned by my perspective upon time and my desire to destroy deception, filth, and foulness. I have killed gods by disproving that Jesus of Nazareth was even slightly divine by any sort of logical thought. After getting a significant amount of my hair cut off one time, I looked in the mirror and realized that Lucifer and I shared the same face down to the detail besides color. His skin emanated light, his hair was pure white and his eyes were a piercing grey. Other than the

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difference of colors between us, our faces are exactly the same. I cannot defy his will because I cannot defy my own will…

But it can’t be. Muhammad twisted the prophecies of Maitreya and Kalki to suit his own ends and lend some legitimacy to his claims of being the ‘final prophet’ and ‘infallible,’ which I’m sure as even the quickest of glances would prove, it is not true. That an individual as wicked as Muhammad fits the prophecies of

Maitreya and Kalki is proof enough to me that the prophecy, in and of itself, is without meaning. Although Muhammad clearly knew of the prophecies before he fulfilled the very few he could, I can offer no such justification for these coincidences in the shadow of my own existence. All of the prophetic coincidences I know of happened before I was aware of them, which I learned of about mid-way through writing this book; I was eighteen and a half when I learned of the prophecies of Maitreya, Kalki and Saoshyant.

Even if I truly am some divine figure, what is to be gained by claiming it? If I truly am the greatest man to ever live, let me earn that title, not have it given to me by a bunch of superstitious fools who believe me to be the ultimate incarnation of wisdom.

I am no god. I have no such powers. Maybe it is true, maybe it is not, but I cannot bring myself to believe that I am even some miniscule caliber of ‘holy’ or

‘prophetic.’ Even if it is false, I would prefer to believe that some ephemeral entity

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told me all of these things, and that is my final deception unto myself. Once I discover the truth of my final question, be it that I am a god or that a god visits me, then I will finally be free. I know exactly how I will find that answer, and it will both liberate and destroy me once I know. For you, I write this before I shed my mortal coil. Future generations must wonder as to what conclusion I came to in my final moments- whether I burned to nothing in the fire, or I returned to my true home in the fire.

“And again he came to cherish

The comfort of mysteries

Inspiring and far away,

Timeless in the moment,

They painted immortality.

Forever drawn towards the center of this ensorcelling flame

Yet, still in fear of the sacrifice it would take to know its name.

"Do not despair," said the mystery

"You will always have a friend in me

Until the day you break my code,

Then I will be gone and you are free

To manifest another."

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Towards the heavens he did aspire,

Now he shall burn who sought the fire.

Some will mourn the ashes cold,

While others behold the inferno unfold.

Forever drawn towards the center of this ensorcelling flame

Yet, still in fear of the sacrifice it would take to know its name.

Now he shall burn who sought the fire…

…to manifest another.”

-Emperor, He Who Sought The Fire

This is my story, my perspective. Never hold these stories to some value above literary, keep them in your mind only as a guide to your life, not absolute laws and examples for all to follow. All existence came together at a point for me, and

I understood and could explain everything; I can only hope you the same fortune, reader. However, this book cannot live your life for you, and that duty is yours alone. At the same time, never forget what you have learned here (if anything at all). Let the legendary fire-bearers of the past light the path, and may those ahead of you provide hope as a twinkling in the distance. As for the present, I do not know… that decision is yours to make.

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Remember, above all else I say here- keep hope alive. So long as we live, hope springs eternal, and though the ravages of this world may crush our hopes and dreams it is ultimately our resignation to a lesser and undignified life that defeats us, not the challenges that we are faced with. Our only true failures are when we fail ourselves, when we fail to retrieve any positive experience at all from our actions. We must keep hope alive in order to keep living. It is essential to our being, both personal and civil, to retain a hope for a better life and actions to such an end. When the Lord of the Near and Nigh rears his diseased, sickly head you can hold the gem of hope before him and watch him cower, for in it there is a purity and a safety that he cannot take from us. We must choose to relinquish this gem, for it cannot be taken by force. It is our choice, between hope and despair, happiness and sadness, good and evil.

This is my dharma, my asha, my tao; what I have written here is what I am, as I have poured out my life here for you, reader. This is my word. So long as my word is not forgotten, I too shall never be forgotten. We all have our own word, and it shines through in everything we do; our speech, our actions, our mannerisms, even our thoughts. My word has been displayed prominently here for you to see and learn from, as I believe that my life is full of lessons and examples that anyone can appreciate and learn from.

Now, I implore you- be free. You have seen and read my word. Put away this book, and seek knowledge elsewhere, for knowledge shall break your bonds.

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Decry the mystical, explore the exotic, muddle through the mundane, look for love- do what you will. This is your life, and I have taken enough of it away from you with this book.

Now, heed my final command. It is not to obey, to remember, to fear, to believe or to listen; it is this:

Be free.

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Works Cited/ Recommended Reading

Highly recommended/Required reading: You probably won’t get this book very well if you don’t read the following:

Any accurate, objective portrayal of history from 3000 BC until 2000 AD

Mythology by Edith Hamilton

General Recommended reading:

The Bible (Old and New testaments)

The Qur’an

The Apocrypha

The Bhagavad Gita

The Avesta (inc. the Gathas)

Myths of Mexico and Peru by Lewis Spence

Dianetics by L. Ron Hubbard

The Book of Mormon by Joseph Smith

The Watchtower

The Origin of Species by Charles Darwin

Histories by Herodotus

The Iliad and Odyssey by Homer

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Religion-Specific Reading:

Christianity

An Encyclopedia of Bible Difficulties by Gleason Archer

Catholic Encyclopedia

Letter to a Christian Nation by Samuel Harris

Islam

Encyclopedia of Islam

The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie

The Truth About Muhammad by Robert Spencer

Atheism

The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins

God: The Failed Hypothesis by Victor Stenger

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Buddhism

The Jataka Tales

The Dhammapada

The Lotus Sutra

Zoroastrianism

Zoroastrians: Their Religious Beliefs and Practices by Mary Boyce

The Denkard

Hinduism

The Rig Veda

The Bhagavata Purana

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Bibliography Cover art- Perez, Fabian. Man In Black Suit III. http://fabianperez.com/galerias/gallery25/Black_suit_III.html Accessed 9/14/2012

1. Do You Know Your Bible? Many Christians Don't. CBN.com. [Online] http://www.cbn.com/cbnnews/us/2009/June/Do-You-Know-Your-Bible-Many- Christians-Dont/. 2. The Book of Enoch. Sacred-Texts.com. [Online] http://www.sacred- texts.com/bib/boe/. 3. Indian Hemp- Drugs Comission Report. Druglibrary.net. [Online] http://www.druglibrary.net/schaffer/Library/studies/inhemp/4chapt9.htm. 4. Mythological Creatures- Xenu. About.com. [Online] http://altreligion.about.com/od/mythologicalfigures/a/xenu.htm. 5. Religion Facts- Joseph Smith. Religion Facts. [Online] http://www.religionfacts.com/mormonism/history/joseph_smith.htm. 6. WebMD- Pleural Effusion Symptoms, Causes and Treatments. WebMD. [Online] http://www.webmd.com/lung/pleural-effusion-symptoms-causes- treatments.

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About the author Justin Ronk

Justin Ronk is a first-time author who has been writing since the age of sixteen. He was born and raised in the town of Amarillo, Texas. Much of his life has been spent in school, up to the age of twenty-one where he decided to take a break from college in order to pursue authoring Where Men and Gods Fear to Tread more completely.

He spent five years of his life authoring Where Men and Gods Fear to Tread, from the ages of sixteen to twenty-one. During this period of authorship, Justin attended Texas Tech University in Lubbock, Texas, as well as Amarillo College in Amarillo.

Justin with diagnosed with both schizophrenia and epilepsy at the ages of nineteen and twenty (respectively), and has spent many days upon days meditating to control these conditions more effectively, many of his revelations being recorded in his book. While many people may consider such a diagnosis to be discouraging, Justin takes it as a challenge to still achieve despite his neurological condition.

Justin goes more in-depth into his own life in Book Six of Where Men and Gods Fear to Tread. In said book, he discusses his muse for his writings, his beliefs on various matters, and many pertinent events in his life.

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