Realmspeak: Talking the T Alk

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2 CONTENTS

FOREWORD 4MONEY MATTERS 102

WORK FOR ALL ...... 103 INTRODUCTION 6DAY JOBS FOR ADVENTURERS ...... 103 GUILDS ...... 109 TRADE AND MERCHANT PRINCES ...... 113 LIFE IN THE REALMS 10 COINAGE ...... 118

RACIAL V IEWPOINTS ...... 11 TRADE GOODS ...... 123 REALMSPEAK: TALKING THE T ALK ...... 13 SLAVE T RADE ...... 130 THE W RITTEN W ORD ...... 19

E AND FESTIVALS ...... 27 VENTS GODS AND FOLLOWERS 132 LEARNING THE ROPES, AND MORE ...... 31 ACTING AND THE T HEATER ...... 34 HOW FOLK W ORSHIP ...... 133 MEDICINE ...... 37 WHY PUT UP WITH EVIL? ...... 134 ILLNESS AND HYGIENE ...... 40 CHARITY ...... 136 DRUGS ...... 41 TEMPLE INCOME ...... 137 POISONS ...... 42 PRIESTHOODS OF THE REALMS ...... 138 CURRENT CLACK ...... 44 THE ART 178

LAWS AND ORDERS 46 HOW MAGICAL IS THE REALMS? ...... 179

CLASS AND NOBILITY ...... 47 SPECIAL BLOODLINES ...... 183 JUSTICE ...... 53 ALCHEMY ...... 184

PROPERTY LAW ...... 56 WORDS OF AWAKENING ...... 185 CORMYREAN NAMING AND T RADE LAWS ...... 57 BARDIC MATTERS ...... 186 SENTENCING THE GUILTY ...... 61 ELVEN MUSIC ...... 188 THOSE W HO ENFORCE ...... 63 SPELLSONG ...... 188 PACTS AND ALLIANCES ...... 67 MORE MAGIC ...... 189 THE SECRET HISTORY OF THE ZHENTARIM .....70 AFTERWORD 190 HEARTH AND HOME 76

WHERE ONE’S HAT IS HUNG ...... 77 INNS AND T AVERNS ...... 79 WHAT’S TO EAT? ...... 82 REGIONAL CUISINES ...... 84 FOOD FROM THE W ILD ...... 91 DRINKS OF CHOICE ...... 92 THESample LATEST FASHION ...... 96 file

3 FOREWORD

A (relatively) young Ed Greenwood summons up his alter ego, Elminster, before the unfurling of a proclamation of great import. Sample file

4 To all who peruse this volume, these: This is the chief reason why adventuring bands—as opposed to strictly ordered profes- Well met, as always, and welcome to the latest sional mercenaries—are suffered to exist in any tome from the pen of Ed of the Greenwood that land where there are laws and lawkeepers. In purports to lay bare secrets of the world I dwell frontier areas, brigands and monsters are preva- in, the place best known to ye as “the Forgotten lent enough to demand that the prudent go Realms.” armed, and the young and penniless have ample A world so vast and rich that its secrets could opportunity to win wealth and reputation by fill libraries—to say nothing of the myriad pass- dealing with locally marauding perils. Yet were I ing details of everyday life, the strivings of folk foolish enough to want to sit on a throne some- mighty and simple. Beggars and humble crofters where, I would take great care to spy tirelessly and can change the Realms as much as kings do, and attentively on all adventuring bands within my its heroes are not always those lauded. Like thy realm and nigh my borders. I would expect my world, the Realms needs splendid deeds from us foes to be hiring them, or manipulating them, or all for life to hold a goodly measure of pleasures both, against me. and rewards. Yet down the years, other than briefly covering In short, it needs thee to make a difference. the charters that Cormyr grants adventurers to at one stroke allow them to buckle their swashes This book, like all guides, seeks to steer readers. and at the same time enact a measure of control Luring them here, and turning them aside from over them, I see that Ed of the Greenwood has there. ’Tis true no book is thick enough to hold neglected this root fact of life in the Realms. everything, but ye should beware the scribe who Which means it’s high time for a book such as is ruthless in omissions of lore that just might this. keep ye alive. Just as much ye should cherish the In recent times, the Realms has seen the sage who reins in his tongue, and never shares rise of broadsheets, or printed scraps of cur- in the first place what dare not be shared. I have rent news and salacious rumors masquerading as tried not to doom the Realms by what I’ve let slip news—something hitherto left to the tongues of down the decades. minstrels, peddlers, and caravan merchants, with Yet some omissions have been born of the the ever-increasing distortions that their retellings urgency of the moment or the lack of pages, inevitably embroider everything with. time and again, and not been set down for all to The pervasiveness of this form of written com- peruse. munication encourages reading, and foments I see Ed is finally seeing, in however paltry and propaganda—and, though it pains me as a sage to slapdash a manner, to some of those gaps, here say it, the reckless sharing of some things better and now. kept secret. I have long thought that the Realms must seem There is a high price to telling all. strange indeed to ye, who’ve not been told any- Why, even to impart the makings of some al- thing comprehensive or coherent about this little loys that the dwarves prize highly would be to detail here, and that little detail, there. shift balances better left as they are, among the For instance, bards’ tales and fireside folklore ever-uneasy threats and counterthreats and pru- simply bristle with mention of evil tyrants—yet dences of rulers and those who desire to rule. in the Realms I know, only nobles and rulers Not all secrets hold that much power, yet any who utterly lose their tempers or who are spoiled might well shift attitudes and beliefs and desires brutes habitually take open and public violent across the Realms, and so have their own effects. action. I see the vast, sophisticated majority of So you’ll not find everything within these nobles and rulers in the Realms habitually using pages. Yet I know I’ve shared more than enough adventurers (and guilds, and costers, and oth- juicy bits to keep ye thinking for a while . . . ersSample they can manipulate instead of paying) as file their agents (sometimes through several layers of go-betweens).

5 upon the world. (Yes, they see they can accom- INTRODUCTION plish far more working together, as a united band Welcome to the Forgotten Realms®, the world of adventurers, and act accordingly.) My players I began crafting when I was six, before there was run characters of various classes with different anything called Dungeons & Dragons® or a role- interests and obligations. For instance, clerics are playing game industry. The world I still work on, under constant pressure from church superiors every day. to do this, that, and the other. And yet, they also It’s been a long, rich, rewarding road, and the continuously pursue their own pet projects (nota- Realms now grows around me courtesy of many bly investments and trade negotiations), as well as loving creators, toiling busily. We’re building a engaging in adventures with the Knights of Myth world that never has to end, a setting that can for- Drannor. Many play sessions begin with the ever be home to novels and roleplaying campaigns characters holding a council wherein they debate and board games and much, much more. and decide what to do next, rather than running This book is a peek at the beating heart of the through a prepared adventure. I lay out the buf- Realms, at what makes it work and seem alive. A fet, and they sample what catches their eye. bright buffet of lore, with buckets of little details 2. The Realms is constantly unfolding. I keep about all sorts of things. A grand gallimau- a flow of current events (and rumors) burbling fry of matters Realmsian, for your perusal and past my players’ ears to make the world seem enjoyment. alive around them and to present a continually There is no “right” way to play D&D® or to renewed, rich selection of adventuring and role- conduct a Realms campaign, and many gamers playing opportunities. Part of this ever-changing won’t use or want everything in this book. Yet if world is a steady stream of new nonplayer charac- it spurs adventure ideas, or provides elements an ters (NPCs), which make up the cast of thousands overworked Dungeon Master can pick up and that is the Realms. The key to the Realms is not use rather than having to think through and cre- just that it has a past, but that things happen; ate anew, it will be useful. It’s not an attempt to history is being made every day. So, over time convince anyone to abide by every detail of canon, (and game editions), prices fluctuate and cur- but rather to provide lore for those who want to rency morphs. If values given here in gold pieces use it, to make more time for unfolding adven- (gp), silver pieces (sp), and copper pieces (cp) tures around the gaming table. don’t seem right for your campaign, change them. Real-world medieval or Renaissance condi- Merchants overcharge when they can, and under- tions, arts, world views, religious beliefs, or charge when they must. standards of medicine don’t directly correspond 3. Subplots and intrigues abound. I love them, to the Realms, just as steampunk fiction is seldom and so do my players. This means mysteries large accurate Victoriana. So, DMs should feel free to and small, little secrets and big ones, clever and twist matters to make their Realms seem excit- sinister behind-the-scenes villains (if I wrote ingly—or unsettlingly—different. Sherlock Holmes, his landlady would eventually By my deliberate design and my players’ pref- turn out to be a sweetly manipulative crime boss, erences, play in my home Realms campaign has hiding behind his notoriety and proximity), and always featured these three characteristics. power groups galore. I try to keep my players so 1. Player characters have the freedom to do busy their characters have a hard time finding their own thing. Play unfolds in a large and enough time to go off adventuring; there have detailed setting so I really can allow PCs the free- seldom been less than a dozen subplots in play dom to choose to stroll north today, instead of at a time. Tied to this is the clear understanding returning to that mystery in the alley to the south that people, groups, and events are all connected they stumbled into yesterday. No Dungeon Mas- in the Realms, so every word and deed has con- ter’s carrot-and-stick, no railroading. I present sequences, just as in real life. Of course, in the theSample world, and the players around the table decide Realms, the stakes are higher,file the pace faster, and where to poke their characters’ noses. They con- the mundane and boring elements are minimized. trol their destinies, and they impose their wills Clear and swift rewards keep Realmsplay from ever being a daily grind.

6 These characteristics are key to the longevity chartered adventuring bands in Cormyr and the and depth of my home Realms campaign, and the Dales such as the Company of the Unicorn and thirst for detail that my superb players exhibit has the Company of the Manticore. At conventions spurred me to build it into the Realms. This in for two decades, on three continents, the Baron’s turn made it seem more real to my players, mak- Blades (hired bodyguards and agents of the baron ing their imaginary achievements matter more. of Hawkhill in the remote farming foothills of My first players were the Company of Crazed northeastern Amn) have fared forth into adven- Venturers. Then rose the Swords of Eveningstar, ture. It’s all been a lot of fun, and along the way who became the Knights of Myth Drannor. With the Realms has gained far more lore and depth other players, I explored the Realms in short-term than could ever be published. public library games whose participants portrayed Well met! Mount up and join the ride!

A self-portraitSample of a much younger Ed Greenwood. Take a peek at what I’m writing; “Divinity in AD&D” was myfile title for “Down-to-Earth Divinity,” in issue #54 of The Dragon (I did this sketch to go with that article). It’s a reminder to me and everyone that when writing about the Realms—deities in particular!—one must Get It Right. The flying beastie (statted out in 2nd Edition format, somewhere in my houseful of handwritten Realmslore notes) is seemingly none too pleased about what it thinks I’m going to write. Wise little beastie.

7 InSample 1986, I began sinking the upper floor of TSR’s Lake Geneva headquarters under the weight of many, many filetypewritten sheets. The principal sufferer was Jeff Grubb, a superlative game designer who became a great friend—and who first suggested that TSR acquire the Realms. Every week, Jeff asked for specific lore, and I assembled and typed it up, and sent it off. This is from the first of many packages; my response to being asked to briefly outline major regions of the Realms for anyone unfamiliar with the world.

8 I alwaysSample furnished players in my campaigns with packs of brief “what your character starts off knowing about thefile world” information. Usually twenty-odd pages, they included detailed maps of the “home” village or city neighborhood, and simplified, error-and-omission- filled regional maps. This is one of the latter, showing what player characters in the Swords of Eveningstar knew about the lands immediately around the Forest Kingdom. It echoes the style of an expensive map one could buy from a Faerûnian merchant.

9 1

So what’s it like, living in the Realms? me in the days ahead” venerations). The existence, The flippant answer is “More exciting than you power, and influence of the divine are unques- would like.” Given the prevalence of wars, casual tioned by all sane beings, so no god ever need be daily violence, and widespread natural or magical taken strictly on faith. Specific directives given by disasters, it’s hard to see things otherwise—yet mortal clergy might be taken on faith—or more Faerûnians do. Unless hardship or outright di- often, questioned or reinterpreted—but everyone saster lands in their laps, they tend to regard such knows the gods are real. unpleasantness as happening to “outlanders, far Atheists and agnostics are rare indeed, yet away,” often as a result of crazed or evil rulers, organized religion doesn’t dominate daily life be- badSample mistakes, and “the will of the gods.” cause ordinary folk, and notfile just priests, know Deities are paramount in Faerûnian life. Every- that divine aims, deeds, utterances, and desires body believes in all the gods and worships every are complex, confused, and sometimes contradic- god (even if only in token “Please don’t frown upon tory. The wants of one god necessarily conflict

10 ERIC BELISLE with another (Talos of storms and destruction Individual, urban-dwelling (in predominantly versus Lathander of creation); and mortals can human trading cities) halfling and gnome fami- never perfectly understand what the gods are up lies gain acceptance by making themselves useful to. Moreover, it’s understood that deities are falli- in the eyes of other citizens. They are the chief ble and can’t govern the future, though they work source of small, clever inventions (intricate dou- to correctly foresee and influence it. ble locks, fold-down doorstops, removable boot As a result, most mortal lives are balanced be- scrapers that double as tools for other purposes, tween daily needs and obligations, personal desires heat-reflecting stove hoods and fans whose blades (“I want my own farm, someday”), and the endless are turned by the heat of cooking fires, and so great game (as Elminster once described it) of try- on). They do the laundry, fix small everyday ob- ing to advance the influence and aims of this deity jects, make speedy deliveries, and seek and find and thwart or lessen the influence and aims of that what paying humans are missing (like a window one, so as to tug the Realms closer to what you per- catch of this precise style to replace yon broken sonally want it to be. There are less noble aims. one, or a dagger to exactly match this rapier, or an identical rug to this one that must be hastily gotten rid of—only one without a large bloodstain RACIAL VIEWPOINTS right in the center of it, please). Humans numerically and culturally dominate Urban-dwelling gnomes in the Realms usually the civilized surface Realms. Most humans hate seek to be the quiet collectors and refiners of good and fear creatures they deem monsters, such as ideas from all cultures, keep low profiles, and beholders, illithids, yuan-ti, drow, and goblinkin. make good livings trading useful items. Gnomes “Goblinkin” refers to hobgoblins, orcs, goblins, make the majority (and the best) of spectacles, and their lookalikes; most humans neither know magnifying glasses, spyglasses, and other devices nor care about actual species differences. In the involving glass lenses. Gnomes have perfected words of the long-ago King Roreld of Athalantar, intricate nonmagical locks and hinges, and mas- “If it looks like an orc, it’s an orc.” Many humans tered large-scale paper-making and bookbinding. mistrust half-orcs and all elves, and a few mis- They are experts on waterproof garments, por- trust all nonhumans, but in Faerûn, most humans table containers for scrolls, and flat paper, and grew up dwelling or trading with elves, half-elves, are building bigger and better looms for everyday dwarves, halflings, and gnomes, and so accept cloth. Many gnomes are working to perfect ever them as fellow citizens. thinner and more flexible wire, and they experi- The folk of the Dales have typical backland ment with fashioning everyday items from it. human attitudes, hating and fearing half-orcs be- This “quietly, quietly” manner has led gnomes to cause they can’t distinguish them from the orc being the truly forgotten folk of the Realms, but mercenaries used so often by Zhentil Keep in also tends to make almost everyone view them as Daggerdale. Some also mistake half-orcs for the harmless, helpful, and friendly. beast-men (ogres) of Thar, having never seen real Across Faerûn, “everyone knows” that elves flit ogres (and lived to tell the tale), and will reach for from one delight to the next diversion, and they the nearest weapon. crave and master the most beautiful music, danc- Almost all humans, elves, and dwarves in the ing, and visual arts linked to flowing, growing Realms mistrust small, non-familial groups of life. It is likewise commonly held that dwarves are orcs (four or fewer), and will be openly hostile to stolid, stubborn hard workers, and master forg- larger groups. As an old upcountry saying plainly ers, who have unequaled skill in working stone states: “Orcs is trouble.” (Or, in full: “Orcs is al- and metal, creating new alloys, and deep, swift ways trouble.”) mining. Orcs are born fighters, which just keep coming Of course, as everyone in the Realms who re- back for more. (And, the smaller inner voices of ally thinks about such things knows, all of these mostSample non-orcs add silently, orcs will kill you and widely known views are stereotypesfile and gener- then eat you. Some of them won’t even wait until alizations, with thousands upon thousands of you’re dead!) exceptions.

LIFE IN THE REALMS 11 Getting along together whisperingly well: There’s nothing like being in the same cabal, with your lives on the line, to close all divides. Until, of course, things go wrong.

What’s in a Name? Korred: The Dancing Folk. Many racial attitudes are revealed in widely used Ogres: Beast-men. terms for the intelligent races of the Realms. In the Orcs: The Mighty (by orcs), slaugh (by elves; entries that follow, races mentioned in parentheses this literally translates as “mud-wallowing-dogs,” indicate those that use the term directly preceding and is creeping into the speech of half-elves, dry- it. If no race is mentioned, the term is in general ads, and other forest-dwelling folk). use (certainly among surface-dwelling humans and Satyrs: The Free Folk. merchant folk of all races). There’s little political Svirfneblin (deep gnomes): The Deep Folk. correctness in the Realms beyond the strictures of polite society in a city or a well-ordered realm. All Together Now . . . Drow: The Dark Elves, the Dark Ones, the The four most widely encountered collective Accursed (by other elves). terms are these: Dwarves: The Stout Folk, anvil-hammerers. Meat: All intelligent prey (by orcs). Elves: The Fair Folk, the People (by elves). The Proud Peoples: Dwarves and elves col- Gnomes: The Quiet Folk. lectively (by humans). Halflings: The Quick Folk, the Sly Folk (by Ugrukh: Wounded, defeated, slaves, and those humans and dwarves). too weak to defend themselves or be worthy of atten- Humans: The manyhanded (by halflings and tion (by orcs, using their term for “broken bones”). elves, in reference to the Manyhanded Curse, an Worms: Lesser goblinkin (by orcs). old elven insult), Brittle Bones (by orcs), oroosh (bySample treants, using their term for “never-stopping The drow and certain elder filesun and moon elven talkers”), hurbryn (by brownies, halflings, korred, nobility (House Starym, for instance) are haughty and satyrs, using their term for “heavy-footed”). esthetes who view dwarves as their true foes; gnomes as degenerate dwarves; and humans,

12 Chapter 1 LORRAINE SCHLETER halflings, orcs, and crossbreeds as children so Modern Term far beneath elves in their intelligence and cul- or Expression Realmspeak tural development that they are dismissed as little anyhow anyhail better than animals able to follow instructions. anyway anyhail This makes those latter races ideal—in their barflies hardjaws (refers to garrulous eyes— slaves who can be collected, bred for traits, tavern regulars) experimented upon with herbs, poisons, magic, barkeep tavernmaster (innkeeper is and surgeries, and—for entertainment and bet- used in the Realms, barkeep ting purposes—hunted or used in races, fights, never) and other sporting contests. beauty/beautiful glim/glimmer breakfast morningfeast (or mornfeast) dinner evenfeast (or eveningfeast) REALMSPEAK: foreigner outlander (not pejorative) foreign goods outland goods (not pejorative) TALKING THE TALK hick hay-nose (bumpkin also used) Creating languages for gnomes, dragons, and all know-it-all clevershanks (men) or the myriad races in the Realms is fun and can clevertongue (women) add flavor to full-on roleplaying (and fragmentary lunch highsunfeast tongues for most nonhuman races exist and are noble highborn (polite use) or slowly being augmented, as the years pass). How- highnose (deliberately rude) ever, it tends to be more enjoyable around the noon highsun gaming table to have some new expressions and perhaps mayhap (“perhaps” is used by borrowed elven and other examples of “outland bards, minstrels, courtiers, talk” to lard the Common tongue—meaning the nobles, and between many everyday language of the players—and impart at- middle-class merchants, but mosphere without baffling the players. only with intimates and family, Accordingly, I’ve compiled a “highlights only” never in public) handy vocabulary of what’s said in the Realms. priest holy-nose (only mildly offen- You can also pick up other words and phrases sive, akin to using “cop” for throughout this work. “policeman”) The overuse of dialect or invented words can tomorrow on the morrow become tiresome or clumsy, but sprinkling speech tonight this night lightly with archaic words and phrases—such as “ ’tis” and “ ’twas”—or invented words placed so that context makes their meanings clear, can help More Involved Terms Some of the elements of Realmspeak involve the Realms come alive as a medieval fantasy world special treatment of normal words, or are com- different from our modern world. plicated enough that they can’t be succinctly The constant flow of traders, adventurers, pil- defined. For instance: grims, and job seekers throughout Faerûn has Art or the Art (capitalized) means magic and made Common the vital and paramount lan- its mastery. guage. Guilds, priesthoods, and folk in backland Badaulder (bah-doll-durr) is the western areas develop their own words and expressions, Heartlands expression for “hogwash.” Its usage but Common is the primary tongue of trade, is creeping into Cormyr, headed for Sembia, the because in most market moots a speaker never Dales, and the Moonsea. knows who will be listening to—and understand- Brightstar means great, exciting, pleasing, ing—asides made in another tongue. marvelous, or superb. Here following is some useful Realms speech Darburl (dar-burl) means angry. For example, lore. Sample“I’m right darburl, just now,” fileor “He makes me proper darburl, that one.”

LIFE IN THE REALMS 13 Galad is a nonsense word for “I’m astonished” or “I’m impressed.” Topics of Discussion The following entries are divided according to Kell means try, but is used only when what- general subject matter and serve as a guide to how ever is being tried is unfinished, nigh impossible, specific and nuanced certain bits of Realmspeak tricky, or dangerous, or there’s some doubt as to can be. whether whoever’s trying it will ever accomplish Importer: The well-established Realms terms it. “Kell” doesn’t change with tenses and is some- for such a profession are “trader from afar” and, times used in place of “accomplish,” as in “You’re more often, “far-trader,” which doesn’t mean a not hoping to kell stealing that, are you?” and foreign merchant who has come from a long way “Kell such feats often, have you?” Polite speech away—who is an “outlander merchant”—but sticks to “try” and “tried” and “done,” leaving rather someone who trades in goods from afar. “kell” for cynical, disbelieving, or openly derisive “Far-shipper” and “caravan merchant” are also speech, such as “Kings always say they’ll clean all common terms, both used to refer to merchants the monsters out of the woods. Oh, and they kell, who bring outland goods into Waterdeep for sale, too, for a tenday, each of them, sometimes send- though far-shipper implies a two-way trade car- ing more than one knight to do it, too.” ried on by a trader who largely remains in the city, Lalandath means agile, sleek, and lithe. It is and caravan merchant implies a traveling trader often used to describe dancers or women whose who literally does the bringing and taking himself beauty is accentuated by their movements. A well- or herself. built but sleekly dancing tavern dancer might be The term “long-cask merchant” means some- spoken of thus: “What a glimmer! A lalandath one who deals in goods that have made a long spurnarmor, glim enough to leave every man in journey, whether the wares are actually shipped in the place rivvim!” casks or not. A “far-wares merchant” is someone Power (capitalized) means divine magical who sells goods from afar, but might not neces- powers. sarily ship them; many Waterdhavian shopkeepers Rivvim means lusty or amorous. For example, buy crates and coffers of curios that catch their “I’m fair rivvim when I looks upon her.” It also eye from Dock Ward warehouses, rather than ar- means ravenously hungry, as in “I was so rivvim I ranging specific importations. could’ve eaten the cow, hooves, hair, and all!” Hooligan: The Waterdhavian terms for non- Scorchkettles are people who habitually de- professional street louts and others who behave liver impressively blistering words to someone in rudely and violently are “toughs,” “fastfists,” and public, usually because they are quick-tempered. “alleyblades.” Toughs is a general collective term, Spurnarmor is a spectacularly good-looking bespeaking an attitude of habitual street loiterers; man or woman, as in “If I had those features, fastfists are those who are belligerent at that very I’d be a spurnarmor too!” or “Galad! What a moment, such as when drunks spill out of a tavern spurnarmor!” spoiling for a fight; and alleyblades are lowlife, Thael means glad, pleasant, or heart-lifting. opportunistic thieves and scavengers who lurk in For example, “I’m always thael to see her,” or alleys and carry knives or homemade weapons to “That feast was right thael,” or “I always get that threaten or to defend themselves with. Any pur- moment of thael, when I look down from the veyors of muscle hired on a long-term basis, such ridge and see . . . home.” as the “Take care of that for me, will you?” gangs Time bells is any sort of alarm clock, wake- hired by most nobles and wealthy non-nobles, are up gong, or audible time signal. Originally these called “bullyblades.” were temple bells, struck to summon faithful to The Sword Coast term for vandals is “cask- particular prayers. smashers,” and the damage done is “casking” Throatslake (or gulletfire, for beer or wine) (even if no casks are involved in a particular in- is any drinkable that takes care of thirst and cident). “Fang gangs” are Dock Ward and South doesn’t cause illness in doing so, but isn’t particu- SampleWard street gangs who use knivesfile and carve gang larly pleasant to consume. “sigils” on their forearms (or less conspicuous places) and on their victims.

14 Chapter 1 Posers who pretend to be hard, violent types, A highcoin lady or a bright spear is an escort but who are usually thrill-seeking teenagers, are who tries to dress, act, and speak like a noble, called sharpjaws because of their sneering, deri- both to dazzle young clients and to attract cus- sive words, and aggression. tomers interested in nobility. Paramour: “Rose” is the Waterdhavian term An escort of either gender who is so slick in for a beau, a suitor, or “the one I desire.” “He’s manner and deft in solicitations that only a few my rose” or “She’s my rose” can mean either “He clients know their trade at all is a hidecoin. A or she is the one I want” or “We long for each vanishcoin, in contrast, is anyone—not just an other.” It can mean “the love of my life,” but escort—who cheats on a business deal, thereby more often it means “someone I long to have as making coin disappear (often by taking it else- my partner, or we both desire to be together, but where forever). haven’t yet actually become intimates.” Nouveau Riche: Down the centuries, in all “Brightheart” means someone your heart is Faerûnian societies, there has been tension be- set on, now that the two of you have kissed and tween the nobility and those who aspire to such danced, been seen together at revels, and felt a status—to say nothing of the tension between desire to see more of each other. the wealthy and the hard-working, middle-class- “Stag” (for males) or “doe” (for females) is or-lower guilded merchants, shopkeepers, and a polite (and bardic) way of describing a lover, crafters (craft workers). There are many terms whereas “buck” or “steed” (or “filly” or “mare”) used to describe the wealthy who lack titles or are jocular, among-the-lads talk. These lat- have only recently acquired them. ter terms would not be used in front of parents, “Newcoin” is a pejorative that refers to those priests, or disapproving relatives. who are newly rich and spending to show it off. “Lovers” and “brightbirds” are perfectly po- “Brightcoin” is used for the socially ris- lite, neutral terms in Sword Coast cities, the latter ing. It’s actually a polite term unless twisted by implying two people who are is courting but not words attached to it. “Drippingly brightcoin,” for necessarily intimate. instance, means one who is ostentatious in spend- “Fancyman” or “fancylass” is a disapproving ing, blindly adherent to fashion, and inclined to pejorative, as in “Your fancyman’s been around display put-on manners. “Bright-fisted-coin” re- again”; and if the speaker is older than the per- fers one who is ramming one’s own success down son being spoken of, “fancyman” will become the throats of friends, acquaintances, and anyone “fancylad.” within reach or earshot, or the practice of such Escort: Many terms are used to describe this behavior, as in “He was loud and rude, full of profession, shifting over time and with locale and bright-fisted-coin talk, all the while; we couldn’t the social standing of either the person being de- wait to be rid of him!” scribed or the individual describing them. “Thrusters” are tirelessly ambitious social A coin lass (for females) or a turncoin (for climbers. No arrogance is necessarily implied; males) waits in an alley to attract clients. The es- this word characterizes someone who will do any- cort usually entertains the client in a rented room, thing to advance in standing, from behaving as a which might be where he or she lives, or off the sycophant to moving to another neighborhood to alleyway, down in a cellar. Most often, such a performing all sorts of demeaning roles or decep- rented room is upstairs, above a street-level shop tions; a “whatever it takes” willingness. that has no connection with the escort. “Highmantle” is used for someone who is suc- A highcoin lass or a laugh-lad is an escort who cessfully superior or refined in manners, as in is more expensive and glim (beautiful, as in “She someone who is politely haughty, not sneeringly was right glim” or “A proper glimmer, she was!”). over-the-top offensively haughty. It is used both Such an individual is better dressed than every- for old-money families and genuine nobles, as day commoners and generally higher class. She well as for persons whom the speaker knows to orSample he has a full set of teeth, bathes regularly, and be newly wealthy or not wealthyfile at all, but who wears clean clothes that aren’t torn or in need of have successfully acted in a noble manner. For ex- mending. ample, “And there he was, right in the thick of the

LIFE IN THE REALMS 15 dance, all proper highmantle, for all Faerûn as if “Hrammar” (hur-ram-uh) is a “hrast” equiva- he’d been born bathing in gold coins!” lent used in the Shining South. “Highnose” describes one who displays a “Naeth” (naythh, drawn-out “th”) is the general haughtiness. Also known in use are equivalent of saying “dung.” “highnosed” and “nose-worthy.” “Naed” (nayd) is a stronger form of “naeth.” “Swirlcloaks” are those trying to copy the ac- “Orbal” (or-ball) is the Shining South equiva- cents, phrases, fashions, gestures, and pastimes lent of “naeth.” of the nobility. In particular, the term refers to “Sabruin” (sah-broo-in) is the equivalent of “— someone who has suddenly come into money and you” or “— off.” wants to elicit better treatment from others by “Tluin” (tuh-loo-in) is the most emphatic way acting noble so as to be treated as noble. of saying “sabruin.” Thieves: The Realms has as many terms for “Stlarn” (stuh-larn) or “stlarning” is a mild thieves as it does for escorts. Idiotically reck- expletive, about equivalent to “screw,” as in less thieves are known as snatch-runners, even if “Bah! They can’t do one simple thing without their crimes don’t actually involve snatching or stlarning up!” running. It’s a pejorative term used for those too “Hrasting” (hur-rast-ing) is a mild form of foolish to avoid being caught soon if they don’t “stlarning,” not associated with “hrast.” “learn them some wisdom” in a hurry. “Straek” (strrake, drawn-out “r”) means “go Clumsy thieves are inevitably “fumblehands,” drown yourself, right now and painfully.” whereas a deft, veteran thief is a “softshadow,” as in: “Never even seen ’im! He took her necklace, Then there are longer oaths. These are many and tiara, and all soft as a passing shadow!” Someone fanciful, but a handful see widespread use in a new to thievery is politely termed a “dayblood,” shortened, expletive-handy form. meaning the thief “doesn’t yet have the blood of “Bind me!” (long form “Bind me and tar me”) the night in him.” is a slightly stronger equivalent of “Weell, strike “The blood of the night” refers to the feel, the me down!” nature, or the essence of what it is to steal for a “Dark!” (long form “Dark and empty!”) is the living. “Nightblood” is a general term, devoid of equivalent of saying “Damn and blast!” judgment, for an individual of the profession. For “Hells!” (long form “Those of all the Nine example: Hells take you!”) began as the Faerûnian equiva- “Who was out on the roof making such a noise? lent of saying “The devil take you,” but is now Not a nightblood, surely!” closer to “Hell take us all.” “Nay, not even a fumblehands; just some ad- “Red garters!” (long form “I’ll turn out your dlepate or lovelorn tryster out to try to break his guts for blood red garters!”) which means, “Ho, neck for himself!” you’re going to catch it.” One mildly comical oath, still said in earnest by older Faerûnians, usually when astonished, is: Curses and Epithets “Happy dancing hobgoblins!” (Hobgoblins do not Like everyone else, Faerûnians cuss from time to say this, and are not amused when they hear it.) time. Here are a few of the most popular Heart- lands profanities. “Haularake” (hah-rake; pronounced very The Art of the Insult quickly, as if it has but two syllables) is the all- The provocative, demeaning, and antagonistic faiths, acceptable in polite society equivalent of terms and expressions in Realmspeak are as many “gods darn it all, anyway.” and varied as those who hurl them. However, the “Sark” (ssark, drawn-out “s”) is a more pow- more formal and less profane ones—such as those erful form of “haularake,” equivalent to “gods written in books and drawled by nobles—tend to damn it all!” take the form of “The stench of your X befouls Sample“Hrast” (hur-rast) is a non-deity-specific you,” where X might be “thefile low, coarse ways “damn.” of your heritage” or “your flagrant misdeeds” or

16 Chapter 1 “your transgressions against the gods and all rea- sonable folk.” There are old, well-used provocations (“Your dam and sire met but once, and coin changed hands—one coin, of copper, and bent”) and more inventive ones (“Dragons fall stunned from the skies when they behold what you are so bold as to call your face, peering up at them”). Minstrels and playwrights ensure that the Realms receives a constant supply of new nastiness, from wry obser- vations (“His mother named him after the family stallion, for some curious reason”) to the crude and direct (“For once, try not to act as stupid as your face tells all the world you are”). It should be noted that halflings, gnomes, orcs, and elves all tend to be more amused than angered by insults directed at them. The same The badge of the Trail Lords trading coster, whose members are is true of dwarves, unless their female ancestors proud to call themselves “wolves among merchants.” Rivals just or living kin are impugned. Human actors, min- call them “the Snarling Wolves.” strels, bards, courtiers, and caravan merchants current head or (rarely) someone dismissed from are the targets of so many insults that such in- being head of the house (perhaps exiled, deposed, dividuals soon learn to take them calmly even if vanished, fled, or locked up as dangerously in- naturally hot-tempered. Drow, beholders, and sane). In the same manner, the family can have illithids tend to be intelligent enough to keep con- multiple Lady Bladderblats. It should be noted, trol over themselves when they believe they have however, that widows are usually referred to as been disrespected, but to call any of them “nigh “Dowager Lady Bladderblat” when speaking of human” is an insult indeed. them, but just “Lady Bladderblat” when speaking to them (widowers are accorded no such titular “Noblespeak” in Waterdeep distinction). A Waterdhavian addresses everyone of known To address a Bladderblat as “young master” or noble status as “lord” or “lady” (toddlers and “young mistress” is seen as a form of admonish- young children usually as “young lord” or “young ment. (The word “miss” in the Realms means lady”). Brief bows are considered polite, but deep “fail to hit what you were aiming at”; it’s un- or florid ones are now often taken as mockery. known as a form of address.) When spoken to “Saer” (rather than “sir”), or “goodwoman” for an infant, a toddler, or a misbehaving youth (up a female, is used by those uncertain of a person’s to the age of eight or nine), “young master” or status but not wanting to give offense. No offense “young mistress” is quite acceptable in the eyes will be taken (except when one Waterdhavian of the child’s noble parents, even if the speaker is noble addresses another one as “saer”). a servant, outlander, or the dirtiest of “low com- “Saer” is also sometimes used to signal respect moners.” When used to address an older noble, when you know you’re addressing someone not it’s an insult, tolerated—though not with plea- noble, but you believe the person has behaved sure—only when used by the Watch or guard or nobly, and so is “worthy to stand with the best.” palace officers, or (passed off as not insulting) A typical noble family consists of the “Lord when used by a very old noble to a younger noble. Bladderblat,” who is the head of the house and The doddering, eighty-year-old Lady Glunder, who may or may not be its eldest male, and sev- for instance, might say it disapprovingly to an eral “Lord Bladderblats” (his sons, cousins, adolescent Lord Bladderblat and not discomfit brothers,Sample and uncles). “Old Lord Bladderblat” the Bladderblats at all; as an elderfile noble it is Lady always refers to an immediately previous head Glunder’s perfect right to speak thus. of the house, so it’s either the dead father of the

RICK DRENNAN LIFE IN THE REALMS 17 Among adult Waterdhavian nobles (who, nat- In Amn, members of the council are supposed urally, all know each other and see each other to be addressed either as “High Honored One” or often at feasts, clubs, and revels), it’s an insult by their specific title, such as “Lord Tessarch.” to address someone by the wrong title. As men- In Cormyr, the king and queen are “Your tioned above, an adult noble will take offense if Majesty” and all other royals are “Your High- called “saer” by another noble, when that person ness.” Nobility and senior courtiers are “lord” wouldn’t be upset at all if a commoner or out- and “lady,” with “saer” and “goodwoman” used lander addressed him or her as such. Nobles refer whenever the speaker is uncertain of rank, some- to themselves as “we lords” or “we worthies,” thing that can give offense if said to someone and they speak of the ruling Hidden Lords and of exalted rank. However, if “saer” or “good- the Open Lord as “the Lords of the City.” Nobles woman” is said with a bow of the head, respect is usually refer to non-noble Waterdhavians as “citi- implied and no offense will usually be taken by zens” when being polite, and “commoners” when someone thus addressed, even if he or she is of being impolite. exalted rank. “Bladderblat” and “Glunder” are not real Waterdhavian noble surnames, but every city in- habitant or frequent visitor knows them. They are Speaking of Time Time in the Realms is never spoken of in terms of the two fictitious noble surnames most popular hours or minutes. Where we would say “a second among Waterdhavian satirical broadsheet writers, or two,” most Faerûnian humans say “a breath minstrels, and tellers of rude street jokes. (“How or two,” and what we would call a minute is “a did Lord Bladderblat decide if young Lady Glun- goodly breath or three.” Dwarves tend to call der was a suitable match for his son? He tried anything up to about three minutes “but a little her out himself, of course. Several times.”) The while,” whereas a halfling would call the same names originated as one acid-penned noble’s way span of time “a long song.” To a halfling, a min- of decrying the antics of certain other nobles, cen- ute is “a tune,” and ten minutes is “three long turies ago, when everyone knew the specific real songs.” Most halflings tend to speak of longer individuals who were being described and made time periods within a single day in terms of how fun of. Today, no one even remembers which far the sun has progressed. noble invented these “fancynames” (the Water- In cities, temples, and monasteries, the equiva- dhavian term for “pseudonyms”), and they have lent of hours are “bells” or “candles” (which evolved into general archetypes. visibly burn down). These are counted in refer- ence to or from an obvious event, such as dawn, How to Address Rulers dusk, or highsun (noon), as in “the trouble began Many areas of Faerûn have distinctive forms of three bells before nightfall.” government and correspondingly particular ways The common (as opposed to regional or poetic) of referring to those who rule. terms for the periods of each day are as follows. In Waterdeep, most citizens rarely have the opportunity to speak to the Masked Lords (the Modern Term Realmspeak anonymous rulers of Waterdeep, who may or may predawn godswake not be noble) directly, aside from very formal set- dawn dawn tings such as legal trials. When they do, they’re full morning harbright usually speaking to a row of featureless masks, so late morning elsun, they say merely, “Lords.” When speaking to the noon highsun Open Lord, almost every Waterdhavian who isn’t early afternoon thulsun his personal friend will say “Lord Piergeiron” (or, late afternoon tharsun by 1479 DR, “Lord Neverember”), shortening sunset sunset it to “Lord” only if they converse together for a gloaming eventide time.Sample dusk nightfallfile or dusk night night midnight midnight or deepnight

18 Chapter 1 In Waterdeep, the clock time is counted in so grimoires in wizards’ tombs, treasuries, and even many bells, but folk also refer to times of day by in public libraries for novices of the Art to find. habitual meals. Breakfast is “mornfeast,” a mid- Other enchanted tomes seem to want to be found; morning break is “slake,” lunch is “highsunfeast,” the magics on them move them into the open, out a tharsun snack is “highthar,” supper or dinner of hiding, time and time again. is “evenfeast,” a late evening meal is “high- Yet even utterly unmagical books are valu- feast,” and a night meal is a “brightstarfeast.” able, interesting—and sometimes dangerous. It bears noting that most Waterdhavian shop- Of course, in the eyes of some rulers, all books keepers, nobles, and guilded merchants refer to are dangerous, because an ignorant populace is late afternoons as “highthar,” or more formally more easily ruled, and any information can be a “highthar-time.” Special-occasion night meals are weapon. What’s certain, down the centuries, is named for the special occasion of which they are that books, like the best gems, retain their value a part. more than almost anything else that’s easily To a caravan merchant, a drover, or a farmer portable. from the lands around Waterdeep, as well as any Many temples derive a lot of income from Waterdhavian noble (or aspiring noble) who rides copying maps, charts, and portions of books from for sport, recreation, hunt, or to fly falcons, late their libraries. So do some independent scribes afternoon is “longride,” and dusk is “last ride.” (who often call themselves “scriveners”) in larger In most walled cities that close their gates at cities across the Realms. In smaller settlements, night, bells are triple-struck to mark when city scribes spend most of their professional time gates are about to soon open (if not at dawn) and writing letters on behalf of the illiterate or the un- again when they are soon to close (if not at dusk). steady of hand. Double-strikes are rung to mark the opening of Regular books are quiet things, and so often shops on workdays in some cities, and again to overlooked—but there is always a roaring trade in mark the daily closing of shops. such items in the Realms. Days in the realms are never referred to as “Monday,” “Tuesday,” or any real-world weekday name. Most folk in the Realms refer to a par- Maps and Charts Maps in the Realms are expensive works, being ticular day as “the first of Mirtul” or “the last of rare, easily damaged or destroyed, and more often Eleint” or as one of the annual festival days. If inaccurate than not. Large, detailed, good maps one must be precise, something like “the first day are usually owned by rulers, from mayors of cit- of the first tenday of Ches” might be heard. If this ies who have sewer and street maps, up to kings date is written or spoken of formally, it becomes who own large and varied collections of old and “1st Ches.” fanciful maps from everywhere. A fair number of maps are also owned by temples, guildmasters, THE WRITTEN WORD and the families of mapmakers, explorers, and adventurers. Some folk in the Realms are illiterate, and In many cases, limners (painters or portrait care little if they remain so. Others value writ- drawers), local heralds, and scribes make good ings so highly that they hire the most expensive livings copying simplified portions of maps veteran adventuring bands to steal or seize from such collections. Royal scribes and reli- particular books. gious scribes are on staff at the court and the Magical tomes are the most infamous, valu- temple, and make copies for stiff fees. Indepen- able, and dangerous books of all; some are linked dent scribes access the aforementioned private to monstrous custodians, or even contain guard- family collections, and in some cases temple and ian spells, poisons, or creatures. Some can see, court collections, by paying fees. An independent think, fly, and unleash spells, thanks to the scribe usually pays a set fee, per map, for access. sentienceSample bound into them. For centuries, the This fee covers the time of thefile junior courtier or Chosen of Mystra have secretly placed magi- novice priest who brings the map to a work area cal scrolls, workbooks, spellbooks, and mighty within the court or the temple, as well as the time

LIFE IN THE REALMS 19