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Meet Sherlock Holmes Final Script A Wayne Scott ● Production LifeH!se An Original Adaptation with Script and Theme Music by WAYNE ROBERT SCOTT Based Upon the Classic Detective Series And Incidents From “A Study in Scarlet” (1887) and “The Sign of Four” (1980) And the Stories, “The Red-Headed League” (1891) and “The Norwood Builder” (1903) by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle © Copyright Mcmxcviii by Wayne R. Scott - LifeHouse Productions, Inc. All rights reserved CAST OF CHARACTERS (In Order of Appearance) Sherlock Holmes Private Consulting Detective Dr. John H. Watson Holmes; Friend and Chronicler Mrs. Hudson Baker Street Landlady Stamford Medical Acquaintance of Dr. Watson Messenger Retired Naval Sergeant Inspector Lestrade of Scotland Yard Constable Gregson Works with Lestrade E. J. Drebber Murder Victim Jabez Wilson Portly, Red-headed Pawnbroker Vincent Spaulding Employee of Wilson’s Duncan Ross League Administrator Mr. Merryweather Bank Director John Hector McFarlane A Young Lawyer Jonas Oldacre Architect and Builder of Norwood Miss Lexington Oldacre’s Housekeeper Mrs. McFarlane John’s Mother “Meet Sherlock Holmes” By Wayne Robert Scott © Copyright Mcmxviii W. Scott/ LifeHouse Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. ACT I Overture (“Theme for ‘Sherlock Holmes’”) (As “Overture transitions to strains of a violin solo, Holmes is seen silhouetted, back to audience, playing the violin in his Baker Street study. Below, in audience area, Dr. Watson enters from opposite the study carrying his tattered medical bag. Mrs. Hudson simultaneously crosses through the study, acknowledges Holmes, and departs through study exterior door leading to “street” audience area, where she meets Watson, at center, amidst various Londoners who occasionally walk by. As the opening dialogue ensues, Holmes stops playing his violin in tandem with the conclusion of the violin solo and, in very dim lighting, dons a lab coat and quietly fusses with various chemical samples at a table littered with assorted books and experimental equipment. He occasionally peers into a microscope) (Musical underscore continues) SCENE 1: BAKER STREET, LONDON Watson Ah, good morning, Mrs. Hudson. Hudson And good morning to you, Doctor Watson. You’re out and about rather early today. Watson Oh, I told the widow, Mrs. Cubitt, that I would see how she was faring. She’s much improved, I’m happy to report. Hudson Humphf! Well, what with your comings and goings— (Motions to Holmes, behind her)— and his comings and goings, it’s a wonder either of you two have need of my lodgings at all! Watson Well, we have to sleep somewhere, after all. Hudson Humphf! I don’t know when! Up at all hours, you are! What with clients, and inspectors dropping in, and all sorts of strange chemical experiments and— and— of course that violin playing at the drop of a hat at anytime of the day or night, and— Watson The violin! Ah, yes! A rather sweet sound today. Hudson He must be in a good mood. Watson A very good sign, indeed. More than likely, he has just arrived at some solution or other… Hudson Humphf! Well, you know him best. Lord knows, I’ll never understand him! But he is a brilliant gentleman, that he is. A bit eccentric but, mind you, he pays the rent on time, that he does. And as long as he does, he can jolly well stand on his head while playin’ a piccolo for all I care! (Listening) And… he does have a way with music… that he does… Watson I don’t believe I’ve heard him play so blithely since… well— since that first, fateful day I ever met him… Hudson Humphf! Well, I’ll wager no one ever forgets the day they first meet— Sherlock Holmes!... Watson (Lost in thought) No indeed… (He thinks reflectively as his thoughts are heard) Hudson Well, good day to you, Doctor Watson… (Exiting) Good day to you… Watson’s Voice Hmmm. How well I remember the day I first met him. Well, in fact… it all began as I was standing… well, right here… holding this very bag— my only possession at the time, broken down as it was. And is!... I was looking for some reasonably inexpensive place to live when I despaired to realize there was nothing here on Baker Street I could afford on my military pension. At least, not on my own. I was just about to walk to the low rent district when, quite unexpectedly , I was spotted by an old acquaintance… Stamford (Calling from audience and running to Watson) Watson!... Watson!... Watson Stamford? Stamford— ! Is it really you? Stamford (Hugging Watson) In the flesh! After all these years! Good heavens! I haven’t seen you since our staff surgeon days at Saint Bartholomew’s… You haven’t changed… 1 Watson And neither have you. Stamford Hmmm. We’re both liars!... (They laugh) Whatever have you been doing with yourself, Watson? You’re as thin as a broomstick and as tanned as a chestnut! Watson Well, I enlisted… Stamford The army? Watson Would you believe it? I was duly attached to the Sixty-sixth Berkshires as an assistant surgeon, just as the second Afghan War had broken out. Stamford No! (Music fades) Watson Quite so. In fact, we fought hard in the Battle of Maiwand. A bloody battle, that one! I took a bullet in the shoulder and, wouldn’t you know— contracted enteric fever, that curse of our Indian colonies. Stamford Good heavens! Watson I nearly died. I was promptly dispatched to England and thus ended my illustrious military career! I have neither kith nor kin here and so here I am, as free as air— or as free as a government pension of eleven shillings and sixpence a day will permit a man to be! I have just now arrived here in London— this great cesspool into which all the lazy loungers and loafers of the Empire like myself are inevitably drawn. And at the very moment you spotted me, I was trying to decipher how I might share lodgings with someone so I could live reasonably within my means. Stamford That’s a strange thing! You are the second man today who has used that expression to me. Watson Oh? And who was the first? Stamford Well, this fellow I met at the chemical lab in the hospital where I work. A singular fellow— quite unforgettable, in fact. Early this morning he was bemoaning the fact that he could not get someone to go halves with him in some nice rooms which he had found and which were too much for his purse. Watson Well! If he really wants someone to share the rooms and the expense, then I am just the very man for him. I should prefer having a partner to being alone, at any rate. Stamford Hmmm. Well— you do not know Sherlock Holmes yet, Er— you— may not care for him as a constant companion. Watson Why not? What is there against him? Stamford Oh, I didn’t say there was anything against him. He’s just a little— er— strange in his ideas— an enthusiast, I gather, in some branches of science. As far as I know, he is a decent fellow. Watson A medical student? Stamford No— I don’t think so. I have no idea what he intends to go in for. He is well up on anatomy and chemistry, but I don’t think he’s taken any formal medical classes. And yet— he has amassed huge sums of unusual, out-of-the-way knowledge which would astound any professor. Watson Really?... Stamford Heaven only knows what the true object of his work is. Watson Have you never asked him what he’s up to? Stamford (Laughing) Oh, no. He’s not easy to draw out. Yet— he can be quite talkative when the mood seizes him. He’s rather a man of contradictions. Watson Well— even so— I should like to meet him. If he’s studious and keeps to himself, so much the better. I’m not strong enough yet to stand much noise or excitement. I had enough in Afghanistan to last me the rest of my life. How may I meet this acquaintance of yours? Stamford Er— well now. You mustn’t blame me if you don’t get on with him. I only know him from when he comes to the lab from time to time. Er— you proposed this arrangement, so you mustn’t hold me responsible. Watson Now, see here, Stamford, It seems to me, all of a sudden, you’re eager to wash your hands of this matter. Is this fellow Sherlock Holmes some sort of disagreeable tyrant— ? Stamford Er— no, no— Watson An ax murderer? Stamford No, no. (Continues to shake his head to Watson’s questions) Watson Well, is he allergic?... Asthmatic?... Bronchitic?...Paraplegic?!... Stamford No, no… Watson Well, what is it? And don’t be mealy-mouthed about it. Stamford It is not easy to express the inexpressible. He’s simply—— passionate… But in any case, it’s best for you to form your own impressions about him… 2 (Music begins) Watson A very good idea. Where is he? Stamford Well, the answer to that is almost as strange as my meeting you here. Watson Oh? (Stamford leads Watson to Holmes) Stamford He’s just over here— at 221 B. Watson Hmmm. Fancy that. Stamford (Tapping on door) Now remember… Holmes Yes, yes… Come in… Stamford (Entering door with Watson) You wanted to meet him. You mustn’t hold me re— SCENE 2: THE STUDY OF 221 B BAKER STREET Holmes (With much energy and at a brisk pace) Aha! I’ve found it! I’ve found it! Yes! (Jumping at the men, test-tube in hand) I have found a re-agent which is precipitated by hemoglobin, and by nothing else! Stamford Doctor Watson— Mister Sherlock Holmes.
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