RETRIEVER Community

PAGE 10 OCTOBER 2, 1990 Adult children of alcoholics struggle to face the past happen.' After years of that, the Scott Peck one every says anything about it. Even after years of living away if you do, they'll put you in a foster of the tunnel. Experts like Retriever Editorial Staff self-esteem really takes a beating." No one ever talks about how they from the home, "adult children" home" creates a resistance to Johnsen and David feel that Dr. Larry David, director of the feel about having it there. It just often have real trouble relating talking about the realities of their group therapy can be an There are an estimated 28 Center's group for children of families, ever. extremely effective way to deal million children of alcoholics in dysfunctional families, points out "I've had the experience where with the problems associated with America; about a thousand of that adults from alcoholic back- we've covered the issues in therapy being an adult child of an them attend UMBC. grounds learn how to deny from Sins of the father for several sessions, we've talked alcoholic. And that number is growing, infancy. a lot about the parent and how "Group therapy is a major part according to most experts. Anonymous "Claudia Black talks about they affected the client," Johnsen of that help," says David. Dr. Bonita Johnsen, a staff people from alcoholic families recalled. "After several weeks, the "Because at that point you're psychologist at UMBC's Counsel- Gospel music is playing softly in he background. "Safe in the arms growing up with three basic rules: person will suddenly look at me breaking 'the rules' of silence. Of ing Center and Coordinator for of Jesus". .. an old favorite. don't talk, don't trust, don't feel," and say, 'No, I don't think my course, that also makes it the the Adult Children of Alcoholics Unable to sleep, I position my small body near the window of my David said. "If you can't talk father was an alcoholic' It's just hardest part. You've learned not program, is convinced that there bedroom. It's way past "lights out" time, I know I should be asleep. about the things that are going on, Bui I'm waiting for the truck. When will my step-father come home so difficult for them to admit or to talk, trust or feel — and that's is a "definite target group" of if you can't trust people around tonight? talk about — they're invested in what therapy is all about. So it's UMBC students who grew up in you in the family, and if you're I, see-the light coming through my mother's bedroom window. I the denial, too. And there's such going to be very hard work, it's alcoholic families. Some of her not allowed to have you feelings, know what she's doing: She's reading her Bible, or maybe writing a sense of guilt. You know, 'if I going to be a re-learning of how colleagues believe that the group then it makes it very difficult later a letter to one of her friends from church. She can't sleep, either. could just have been better, if I to think about yourself, and how might be as large as 10 percent 1 in life to even know who you are She's waiting, too. could have done something dif- to deal with other people' of the total student body. A far-off squealing sound. Tires making their marks in the asphalt — and it makes if difficult to have ferently. . .'" The UMBC Counseling Center These "adult children," accord- of our street as his giant Dodge rounds the corner. A tightening in any kind of intimate Johnsen feels that the negative offers a program for Adult Child- ing to Johnsen, experience certain my stomach. My mother's light goes off. relationship." effects this has can be devastating ren of Alcoholics, designed to help common problems which stem Let the show begin. David and Johnsen agree that as the "adult children" try to make students with the "re-learning" directly from their dysfunctional He roars into the driveway, sending turf flying in every direction. adults who grew up in alcoholic their way in the world. For process. upbringings. That's a bad sign. There will be trouble — but how much? families tend to carry the same His drunken footsteps echo in through the windows. I know my example, children of alcoholics Students who are interested in "Sometimes when [adult child- problems with them into their mother will be listening too, although she's pretending to be asleep. have a far greater risk of becoming the program, says Johnsen, ren] come in," she said, "you'll school or professional lives. The We know the sounds by heart, we know the lines. There's the rattling alcoholics themselves. should "call or come by the Center find out that they're having trou- patterns of denial and guilt stick — that's him fumbling for his keys. The sad, painful squeaking of "No one knows why this and say that they're interested in ble in school, because they can with them, until they come to the front screen door. Now the front lock. He's inside. happens — we just see that it the Family Problems group or the never seem to complete a project. recognize those patterns and deal I listen carefully for every sound, tensed for a quick escape through does," she says. "Whether it's Adult Children of Alcoholics They often have trouble complet- my window, if necessary. with them. hereditary, or just from the emo- group and ask to talk to Larry ing anything. Or their friends all Oh God, oh God, oh God, please sweet Jesus, please don't let him "It just permeates a person's tional upset of the family, we're or myself. And we would talk to tell them they're too serious, or hurt. ... life," says Johnsen. "I've heard not sure. But it happens, over and them, and just go from there. We too sensitive. Those are some My bedroom door slams back against the wall. I make an instinctual people describe the alcoholic over again." would make the whole process common kinds of thing that come lunge for the window, which I had opened earlier, just in case. But home environment by comparing he's learned that little defensive trick of mine by now. He knows to Her colleague, David, agrees: real easy for them." up. it to living in a house. It's a step slowly and quietly, to give no warning that he was near. "If you grow up where you see David and Johnsen can be "The trust issue is also para- normal-looking house, at least it I'm too late. people drink as a way of dealing reached at the Counseling Center mount. They have a tendency not looks normal from the outside. with life, and dealing with stress, extension, 455-2472, or students to trust people, not to believe what (see ALCOHOLIC, page 11) But in the living room is this big when things get tough — then, are encourage to just "stop by" they see. That's because inconsis- elephant. And everyone has to later, you will drink when things the Counseling Center in room tency is the 'rule' in the family — isn't discussed. And they have to their experiences to anyone. All walk by this elephant, sort of make sure that no one from the the years of being warned, "don't get tough" 201 of the Math/Psch building. the day after an incident, everyone squeeeze by it all the time, but no But there is a light at the end says, 'no, that didn't really outside ever sees it." tell anyone what really happened; Sliwa warns Mayor Schmoke: Angels could abandon city last resort. He feels that the Angels After figuring out "the way things Russ Johnson cannot accurately present a positive Retriever Staff Writer were", Sliwa decided that his role model to street gangs if his own response to the problem would be In a scene directly out of a members are being incarcerated by to form the Guardian Angels — a Hollywood "terrorist" thriller, the police, who should be support- group which, he hoped, could several militants sporting blood-red ing the group. For Sliwa, the provide an abundance of positive berets and camouflaged fatigue dichotomy would defeat the whole models for impressionable street pants stormed the UC Ballroom purpose of the Guardian Angels, kids. Thursday night and held nearly 50 which was to provide impression- And that, he feels, is the reason students captive for several hours. able city kids with positive images that, unless there is a fast change The "siege" started at 7:20 p.m., to emulate. in Baltimore's attitude toward the and did not end for nearly two and group, they will move on to another a half hours. No physical injuries city. How, he asks, can children be were inflicted, but more than a few ". . .people would expected to emulate the Angels if members of the audience did suffer be able to take the the city is treating the group like blows to the ego thanks to the hoodlums and criminals? coup's leader Curtis Sliwa, alias bars off their win- What really angers Sliwa is that "The Rock," alias "Angel One." he feels Baltimore should be able In a power-packed "Someone to dows, but they to handle the situation better than Watch Over You" speech, Sliwa would also have it is. He cites New York as having crucified several prominent Balti- a bad case of "DID" syndrome: moreans, starting with Kurt "I want four times the Deny, Ignore, Delay. DID, says to legalize drugs" Schmoke. Sliwa, came about as a result of the "As you can tell, there's a caul- amount of drug- years of mayor Ed "Crotch's" dron of intellectual activity in users in their administration. But Baltimore has Baltimore," said Sliwa, his voice hosted the Guardian Angels for a oozing sarcasm. "Yeah, people neighborhoods." long time. Sliwa thinks that the city would be able to take the bars off should "know better." And he is their windows, but they would also — Curtis Sliwa struggling, in his words, with have four times the amount of drug- Schmoke's "deafening silence" and users in their neighborhoods. Legal- Sliwa had a revelation about the with the city's "inability to accept izing drugs would have the same role-model dilemma while eating bold new initiatives." effect that alcohol had on the Native his cereal one morning, back in Thus far, Sliwa has heard nothing photo by Rick Smith Americans." 1979. He noticed Mr. T swimming from the mayor, and the city's Curtis Sliwa speaks out against Kurt Schmoke's "deafening silence. It. was not the mayor's contro- in the milk, and suddenly, for Sliwa, silence remains unbroken. versial drug stance, though, that led it all became clear. Sliwa to come to Baltimore. Sliwa "Mr. T wore a lot of gold," said is furious about what he calls the Sliwa, "but how many kids got mayor's "deafening silence" regard- wasted for wearing all that gold?" ing recent problems which have Richard Pryor, a "walking, I:UJ;1UW; plagued the Baltimore chapter of human turd" to use Sliwa's artic- FLASH the Guardian Angels. ulate description, was also a model February 19,1968 Last July, two members of the for black youths, but Sliwa uses local Angel's group were arrested Pryor as an example of the "con- on assault charges and sentenced to volute images" minorities have to three years probation. The Balti- follow; a "real hero" whose name As a part of its more Angels feel that, not only was was plastered on the cover of every UMBC MAGAZINE CENSORSHIP REVEALED ' the decision unjust, but that they magazine and newspaper of the Silver Anniversary were victims of persecution. The By Mike Klingaman appeared in a play written by printing dates, three of our staff country because he set himself on members worked for two consec- judge who presided over the case Editor-in-Chief Glenn Blanchard, Editor of Celebration, fire while free-basing cocaine. DIALOGUE. utive days to finish DIA- referred to the group as "boys in The censorship of a literary And what, asks Sliwa, about magazine often becomes quite a Despite the hindrence, the LOGUE," continued the source. The Retriever uniform" and compared them to the hispanic youths who had no role touchy subject. When the mag- staff did finally publish the When contacted, a Roebuck KICK — a statement which many models at all until Tony Montana azine is written and coordinated magazine—but only after the firm associated replied, "The of the black members of the starred as a Cuban gangster in by a group of college students, "obscene" jargon had been term was vulgar and in bad presents a Guardian Angels found to be ironic Scarfacel It bothers Sliwa greatly the oppression of any material scratched. Since the author taste." and offensive. that those young people patterned by those people in higher echel- refused to print the story after The literary magazine staff is continuing series In response to the judge's public their behavior on a fictional char- ons can be fatal to the existence any revisions, no part of the play expected to contract a different derision, Sliwa has continually acter created by Anglo-Saxon of the journal. appeared in the campus journal. printing firm foor its spring of article from petitioned the mayor to take some director Oliver Stone, who himself Such was the case of the "The term that Roebuck and edition. action. He jokes that his personal was in "the dregs of his life" when UMBC literary magazine, DIA- Son considered obscene was Another problem that plagues past issues. fax machine is saying "no more 301, he made the film. LOGUE, which made its debut approwed by Dr. Lasher (Head the UMBC DIALOGUE crew is of the Humanities Division), one of headquarters space. "The please." But the mayor, says Sliwa, As these ideas were forming on campus last December 15. * * * has yet to break the "terrible silence inside Sliwa's head, he was also According to a DIALOGUE Mr. Goodman (Instructor in science lab assistants are throw- ing us out of our office," noted of City Hall" by responding to the managing a city McDonald's res- spokesman, "Roebuck and Son English and advisor to DIA- requests for help. So now Sliwa has Printing Company (the firm LOGUE), Dean Schamp (Dean the group's spokesman. "As of taurant. Day after day, he saw now, we have no home. If anyone This week, we set up an ultimatum: If Mayor children swarming through his which published the first edition of Faculty), and Dr. Kuhn Schmoke does not respond by of DIALOGUE) refused to print (Chancellor of Baltimore would like to donate an apart- restaurant "like locusts," picking ment," concluded the informed Monday, the Angels might "pack a story, because of what they County Campus)," confided the flashback to the pockets of every customer in magazine spokesman. "They source, "please contact Glenn their bags" and head for other areas considered obscene termin- sight. Sliwa thought that the kids' (Roebuck) changed our layout Blanchard at 744-7800, exten- of Maryland where they will be ology." February 19,1968 behavior was the result of the kinds The Material in question twice. Because they held up our sion 214." welcomed. of role models they had to look up The ultimatum, says Sliwa, is a to.

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