9/28/2020 Worst Movie Product Tie-Ins

Worst Movie Product Tie-Ins By Chris Ortiz

On Friday, The Hunger Games hits theaters. The movie takes place in a dystopian future where children are forced to battle each other to the death. You'd think that kind of movie would not easily lend itself to product tie-ins... But leave it to marketers to find a way.

Among the movie's product tie-ins is h20 water — you know, the preferred drink for when you're being chased to death by your peers for sport. The movie also offers Capitol Colours nail polish, modeled after the eccentric fashions of the Capitol citizens, you know, the same people who disfigure their bodies for fashion and cheer on child tributes as they slaughter each other for Capitol entertainment.

Hunger Games certainly isn't the first movie to come out with some questionable product tie-ins. Evidence here the worst movie product tie-in merchandise we could find. Sadly, we own some of this horrible stuff.

Watchmen Condoms Of course, the 2009 graphic novel adaptation was intended for adults but when it came out with a line of blue condoms, well, we knew to leave the kids at home for this movie. But now that we think about it, condoms make sense as a product tie-in for a movie where one of the main characters, Dr. Manhattan, walks around in the buff.

Atari's E.T. Video Game Video games based on movies are nothing new, but the genre hit an extremely low point with this 1982 turd based on one of the most successful movies of all time. The gamemakers only had four months to rush this to the market and, unsurprisingly, the result reflects that. Cited as one of the biggest commercial failures in video gaming history, the game is also blamed for Atari's massive financial losses in the early 1980s. Literally millions of copies of the game were famously buried in an Alamogordo, NM landfill. We even feel bad for the landfill. https://web.archive.org/web/20120728072056/http://www.reelz.com:80/article/1474/worst-movie-product-tie-ins/ 1/5 9/28/2020 Worst Movie Product Tie-Ins

McDonald's Shrek Glasses McDonald's is known for its long history of movie product tie-ins. With the 2010 release of Shrek Forever After, the fast food giant offered "collectable" Shrek glasses. All good, right? Except the glasses contained the toxic metal cadmium, a carcinogen that causes kidney, lung, intestinal, and bone damage. Not exactly a chemical you want in something you plan on putting your mouth on. McDonald's was forced to recall 12 million Shrek glasses. No word on where they're buried.

Demolition Man's Taco Bell In Demolition Man, Sylvester Stallone awakes in 2032 in a city where crime has all but been eliminated and the only restaurant to survive the "fast food war" was Taco Bell. While not an exactly a movie tie-in, we couldn't help but include this movie product placement because of its complete absurdity. In San Angeles, any food that is not good for you (including salt) is illegal. That would mean any food served at Taco Bell — including the restaurant's latest menu abomination, Doritos Locos Taco — wouldn't be available to the fine citizens of San Angeles. It's also worth noting that in versions of the movie shown overseas, Taco Bell was replaced with Pizza Hut. Not really an improvement.

Star Trek Eggo Waffles Who doesn't love waffles in the morning? Then again, who wants the Starship Enterprise for breakfast? Apparently, the folks at Eggo thought we all would when they introduced waffles with colorful images of their favorite Star Trek characters. But we're sure it's not just Trekkies who think there's something wrong with pouring syrup on Capt. Kirk or Spock and then eating them. As the Kansas City Bastards say so elegantly, "I don't like having a mouthful of Spock."

Captain America Baskin-Robbins HYDRA Sundaes In Marvel's Captain America: The First Avenger, Capt. America goes off and fights Red Skull's evil HYDRA army, a branch of Nazis. So what better way to celebrate America and the movie but by enjoying a Baskin-Robbins HYDRA Sundae. In other words, a Nazi sundae made of chocolate mousse royale ice cream loaded up with brownies, then topped with hot fudge, whipped cream, sprinkles and a cherry on top. On second thought, a Nazi sundae doesn't sound that bad... https://web.archive.org/web/20120728072056/http://www.reelz.com:80/article/1474/worst-movie-product-tie-ins/ 2/5 9/28/2020 Worst Movie Product Tie-Ins

Dark Vador Burger May the force be with you if you dare to try a Dark Vador burger that comes with a black bun. Really, what sounds more delicious than a burger with a black bun? This delicacy was served overseas at a restaurant called Quick to coincide with the re-release of Star Wars: Episode 1 - The Phantom Menace. Even as bad as that product tie-in is, it's not even close to being to worst thing to come from that godforsaken prequel.

Behold, the absolutely worst movie product tie-in that we've ever come across...

The Jar Jars Binks Mega Mouth Candy As if Jar Jar ruining the Star Wars prequels wasn't bad enough, the creative minds over at Skywalker Ranch brought us this contraption. What's better than sucking a sugar-coated Jar Jar Binks tongue? (Ummm, licking an outlet socket?) Talk about shoving Star Wars merchandise literally down our throats. And shouldn't giving this "candy" to a child prompt a call to social services? We actually lost sleep after seeing this awful, horrible movie product tie-in. If you've got a worse one, drop us a comment below.

Related: E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial Demolition Man Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace Star Trek Shrek Forever After Watchmen Captain America: The First Avenger The Hunger Games

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COMMENTS

Ummm https://web.archive.org/web/20120728072056/http://www.reelz.com:80/article/1474/worst-movie-product-tie-ins/ 3/5 9/28/2020 Worst Movie Product Tie-Ins kevin | 03.29.12 10:12:30 AM Correct me if I'm wrong, but is the Star Wars character's name actually "DARTH" Vader, not "DARK" Vader... which means the BK burger with black buns changed the name to 'dark' simply because the character wears black. (and probably to avoid getting sued). Looks nasty, even worse committee thinking than Pepsi's disaster "Crystal Pepsi". Reply | Report Abuse

Dark vs Darth Charlotte | 03.29.12 12:48:43 PM Dark Vador is the French name of Darth Vador. You can barely pronounce "th" in France. And remember the name was chosen in the late 70's....

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You guys... billwenham | 03.29.12 08:06:16 PM It's Dark Vador. Whereas the character's name is Darth Vader.

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Dark vs Darth Vader Red Sam Rackham | 04.10.12 01:54:29 PM Of course Mel Brooks' Spaceballs had DARK HELMUT ...? Report Abuse

Taco Bell ryesman | 03.29.12 09:37:01 AM "In San Angeles, any food that is not good for you (including salt) is illegal." Yeah, but is Taco Bell really food? Just up the saw dust count and you could skirt the law. Reply | Report Abuse

mean-spirited mean-spirited | 03.29.12 04:47:05 AM this article sucks

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Re:mean spirited jason | 03.29.12 08:12:41 AM Yeah, those poor corporations have to put up with a lot of abuse. Maybe you should give them a hug.

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