“The real Weather: chill news is unfit (this is humor) to print” Fake News Time

VOL. UP, BASS CRANKED MONDAY, JANUARY 23, 2017 (DAY 4) 2.50 XBT

PRESIDENT DEMANDS THAT CHINA RELINQUISH NAMING RIGHTS TO “SUPER BOWL LI”

Trump Says: “Years Ago, Crooked Hillary Must Have Brokered The Sale Of The Game’s Naming Rights to The ‘LI’ Family – It Must Be In The Deleted Emails! …. The Game Should Have An American-Sounding Name, Like ‘Trump,’ ‘Pence,’ ‘Giuliani,’ ‘Palin,’ Or ‘Putin’” Trump Orders White House: NFL Trump Accuses Kremlin Joins In Huge Investigation Should Return to “LI” Family Of Condemnation of

Who Is The “LI” Family, Great Names Egotistical Self- “Act of Aggression” And How Could It Afford From Past Games Promotion MOSCOW – “The world To Buy Naming Rights To should focus attention on N.Y., N.Y. – The President China. It has interfered with an The Super Bowl? Is It A MAR-A-LAGO – On Skype, President Trump said, “The tweeted: “The ‘LI’ family important American internal Multi-Year Deal? NFL has strayed from what should stay in its lane!” By contest – namely, it tampered phone, he denounced “Mr. with bowling game. This was a WASH., D.C. – Apparently made it great in the past. I LI” for venturing into provocative act of aggression,” know they want to make unaware that “LI” is the American sports, where said Russian Official Sergei more money, by selling the number 51 in Roman “LI” lacks experience. The Lebowskiev, by phone, while numerals, the President lashed naming rights. I mean, who President said that Trump preparing to travel to Crimea. out – accusing China of doesn’t want to make more Magazine, Trumped talk “We bigly condemn Big-LI, money? But this year’s name buying the naming rights to radio, Trump New Media, Continued on KGB Servers the game. “It’s obvious, folks, is not right; it’s not and the Trump Network all based on the ‘LI’ name, that American.” The President used to be full of stories of Trump Delivers this is a family from China,” further stated, “I like the the failures of cocky guys – Ultimatum he said. Given the huge price adult-themed names of past drunk on Trump Vodka (on Trump Ice) with stomachs that they must have paid and years, like Super Bowl ‘XX’ WHEREVER – In a statement full of Trump Steak – who the fact that he had never even and Super Bowl ‘XXX’; they on Pinterest, the President has (using Trump Mortgage) just really grab you, if you demanded that China relinquish heard of the “LI” family, the funded ventures involving know what I mean. But some its right to have “LI” appear as President stated that the Trump Shuttle air travel of the old names were just the third word of the Chinese government must (booked on GoTrump.com) championship game’s name. disasters. I mean, what the have funded the sponsorship to places like Trump Taj The President further stated: deal – probably by currency hell were they thinking Mahal casino and Trump “Upon China’s relinquishing manipulation. “Crooked naming it ‘XL’? Who names On The Ocean. “If ‘LI’ had the naming rights, I will work Hillary is at the center of this, a championship after a shirt played Trump The Game or with the NFL to find a suitable I tell ya,” said the President, as size? In all honesty, that was graduated from Trump U, American buyer of the rights to he ordered an investigation by such a stupid name choice. It then he’d know better,” said the third word in the name of FBI Director James Comey. was a total disaster.” He also President Trump. this year’s TRUMP BOWL.” Continued on Page 五十一 Cont’d on Access Hollywood Continued in Chapter 11 Continued until – gasp – 2021