ON BEHALF OF THE WORKING CLASSES THE COMEDY CARPET BLACKPOOL GORDON YOUNG & WHY NOT ASSOCIATES LAUGH... I THOUGHT MY TROUSERS WOULD NEVER DRY THE COMEDY CARPET GUIDE 16 17 18 19 20 WE OFTEN COME TO SEE 6 11 THE WIFE’S MOTHER HERE. SHE LIVES IN BIRMINGHAM, 7 12 BUT SHE LOOKS BETTER 1 2 3 4 5 13 FROM BLACKPOOL. 8 LES DAWSON 9 14 10 15 1. TOMMY COOPER 2. FRANKIE HOWERD 3. MORECAMBE & WISE 4. LES DAWSON 5. KEN DODD 6. CONTEMPORARY 7. DOUBLE ACTS 8. TELEVISION B 9. HUMPHRIES / HANCOCK / MILLIGAN / KAY 10. RADIO 11. MONTY PYTHON 12. THE TWO RONNIES 13. REGIONAL / INTERNATIONAL 14. HISTORY A 15. CATCHPHRASES B 16. TELEVISION A 17. CATCHPHRASES A 18. FILM 19. CONNOLLY / COOK / WOOD 20. HISTORY B BRITISH COMEDY RUNS THROUGH BLACKPOOL LIKE THE TOWN’S NAME RUNS THROUGH A STICK OF ROCK. With the tourists came the comedians, a double- act stretching from the teeming early music halls to post-war end of pier matinees, risqué postcards and record-breaking summer seasons in the 1950’s and 60’s. In today’s 21st century culture of Little Britain’s laydees and Leagues of Gentlemen the town still lives and breathes laughter. Gordon Young and Why Not Associates use this long tradition as a springboard for The Comedy Carpet site, a unique celebration that builds on the huge success of their earlier Lancashire collaboration for the Eric Morecambe Memorial, opened by Her Majesty the Queen in 2000. Every step offers catchphrases, gags, sketches and oneliners from George Formby’s music hall to The Mighty Boosh’s multi-channel digital age. The silly, the saucy and the surreal can rub shoulders underfoot – Goons side by side with the Royles, Peter Kay toe to toe with Tommy Cooper, Victoria Wood back to back with Lily Savage. While the design reflects the sensibility of classic show posters, it will be accessible from any direction, as subjective as different senses of humour, but with something for everybody – The Hen Party, the High Rollers, the Dirty Weekenders... and your Auntie Elsie. From this amazing location you can see all points of the national comedy compass, and even now Ken Dodd’s revising his Giggle Map of the UK! The great British public have always been bovvered about their comedians, and where better to walk the talk than here in Blackpool? 1. TOMMY COOPER 2. FRANKIE HOWERD Tommy Cooper was born in Caerphilly, South Wales on 9th Howerd was born the son of a soldier, Francis A. W. Howard, in March 1922. He was two months premature, possibly the York, North Yorkshire, England, in 1917 (not 1922 as he later last time in his life that he was early. Being a premature baby claimed). He was educated at Shooters Hill Grammar School in 1922 was not the best start in life and the doctor who in Woolwich, London.[1] His first appearance on stage was delivered Tommy didn’t hold out much hope for his survival. I’M ALWAYS ASKED ONE QUESTION: at age 13 but his early hopes of becoming a serious actor DO I AGREE WITH SEX BEFORE THE WEDDING? I LOVE KIDS. WENT TO SCHOOL WITH THEM. OOOH, NO, NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I’M GOING However, his grandmother kept him alive on drops of brandy TO GIVE YOU A STRAIGHT ANSWER. were dashed when he failed an audition for RADA. He got into I DO NOT AGREE WITH SEX BEFORE THE WEDDING, I HAD A MEAL LAST NIGHT. PARTICULARLY IF IT HOLDS UP THE CEREMONY. I ORDERED EVERYTHING IN FRENCH, MISSUS! SURPRISED EVERYBODY. IT WAS A CHINESE RESTAURANT. and condensed milk and little Tom got stronger as each day OH, HE’S A VERY PECULIAR MAN, MY AGENT. entertaining during World War II service in the army. Despite AND I SAID TO THIS CHINESE WAITER, YES. HE’S GOT WHAT THEY CALL A DUAL PERSONALITY. TITTER “LOOK, THIS CHICKEN I’VE GOT HERE IS COLD.” passed. Within a few weeks he was well enough for the family AND PEOPLE HATE BOTH OF THEM. suffering from stage fright he continued to work after the war, HE SAID, “IT SHOULD BE, IT’S BEEN DEAD TWO WEEKS.” YE I SAID, “NOT ONLY THAT,” I SAID. I SAID – I SAID IT TWICE – I SAID, IS IT RIGHT? SHOULD ROMAN CATHOLIC PRIESTS BE ALLOWED TO GET MARRIED? “HE’S GOT ONE LEG SHORTER THAN THE OTHER.” to move to Exeter in Devon. WELL, I WOULD SAY THIS, IN ALL FAIRNESS: NOT! beginning his professional career in the summer of 1946 in a HE SAID, “WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WITH IT? ONLY IF THEY’RE VERY FOND OF EACH OTHER. No.Don’t laugh. No. Don’t, please. Y ou’llmak etr ouble.I beg EAT IT OR DANCE WITH IT?” ofyou. Don’t laugh. No, she can’t hear ,and, oh, she’s a funny woman,you know! Mind you, she’s had a ter riblelife. Oooh, touring show called For the Fun of It. I SAID, “FORGET THE CHICKEN, GIVE ME A LOBSTER.” NAY, NAY AND shockinglife! Oh, yes, ter rible![Shouts in her direction] SO HE BROUGHT THE LOBSTER. I LOOKED AT IT. I SAID, When he was eight years old his aunt Lucy bought him I’MTELLING THEM YOU’VE HAD A TERRIBLE LIFE. Y es, itis ver ychilly tonight! Y es!I know! Chilly! Y es!There’s “JUST A MINUTE, JUST A MINUTE,” I SAID, THRICE NAY! awind blowing up the passage tonight! Y es!Ve rychilly Now listen, brethren, before we begin the eisteddfod, I’d like tonight!’Tis, yes! Think winter’s back! I SAID WINTER ’S “HE’S ONLY GOT ONE CLAW.” to make an appeal. No, it’s not an appeal for money. You’ve BACK!Y ehss![T alkingto the audience again] P oorold soul! a magic set and Tommy spent hours playing with it and been robbed enough as it is! No, you feel such a ninny stuck Well,she’s past it, y’know – that is, if she ever had it! No, He soon started working in radio, making his debut at the start HE SAID, “WELL, HE’S BEEN IN A FIGHT.” really, no, she should be in bed... up here if no one laughs. Now, who can manage a little I SAID, “WELL, GIVE ME THE WINNER.” titter? You could? It isn’t always easy to get your titters perfecting the tricks. At the age of sixteen he got a job on out on a wet Wednesday. No–don’t laugh. No, don’t. No, I TRIED TO SWIM THE ENGLISH of December 1946 on the BBC Variety Bandbox programme don’t laugh. Listen. Pull yourselves together. You’ll make CHANNEL, BUT THREE MILES BEFORE me a laughing stock. God help us! This is gonna be a rowdy AS A LITTLE KID I WAS UNLUCKY do, I can see. Look, dear, don’t titter while I’m tirading – REACHING THE FRENCH COAST, I GOT board a boat as an apprentice shipwright and it was here there’s a good woman. I’ll tell you when to titter, dear. You CRAMP AND HAD TO SWIM BACK. with a number of other ex-servicemen. His fame built steadily I HAD A ROCKING HORSE ONCE AND IT DIED shouldn’t be here in your condition anyway! that he gave his first public performance. In typical Cooper throughout the late 1940s and early 1950s (aided by material OOOH MY TEETH ITCH. SHE WAS A REDHEAD. I WENT TO THE DENTIST. NO HAIR, style each trick he performed went disastrously wrong. He written by Eric Sykes, Galton and Simpson and Johnny HE SAID MY TEETH ARE ALL RIGHT JUST A RED HEAD. BUT MY GUMS HAVE TO COME OUT. I BACKED A HORSE TODAY – 20 TO 1. was supposed to pull a series of coloured handkerchiefs from PLEASE Speight). In 1954, he made his screen début opposite Petula SO I WENT TO THIS DOCTOR AND I SAID, IT CAME IN AT 20 PAST 4. AND THE JOCKEY KEPT HITTING HIM WITH THE WHIP, YOURSELVES! “IT HURTS ME WHEN I DO THAT.” LIKE THAT, NOT LIKE THAT, LIKE THAT. a cylinder, but they got stuck, a card fell out of his sleeve, Clark in The Runaway Bus, which had been written for his HE SAID, “WELL DON’T DO IT.” AND THE HORSE SAID, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT FOR? I PAY FOR THESE JOKES HE SAID, “I WANT YOU TO LIE DOWN ON THE COUCH.” THERE’S NOBODY BEHIND US.” Tommy ran out of the room, tears running down his face. specific comic talents, but he never became a major film I SAID, “WHAT FOR?” HE SAID, “I WANT TO SWEEP UP.” I MIGHT AS WELL USE THEM SHUT YOUR FACE! I BOUGHT A GREYHOUND ABOUT A MONTH AGO. A FRIEND OF MINE SAID, “WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH IT?” And the boss came up and he said, ‘Ah, good morning.’ He said, ‘I want you into the street and looked for it, and I could soon see the way it had gone, I SAID, “BUT SERIOUSLY, DOCTOR, I HAVE to collect some goods from the depot and deliver them to Crewe.’ Ooooh, because there were crowds of people lining the road – waiting for the rest When he finally managed to calm down he began to analyse I thought! Ooooooh, good, y’see! No. ’Cos: Crewe! ’Cos, I’ve always wanted of the procession. What a silly thing to do! I mean, you’d think they’d have presence.