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And Now I'm Just Different, but There's Nothing Actually Wrong with Me

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And Now I'm Just Different, but There's Nothing Actually Wrong with Me Journal of Homosexuality ISSN: 0091-8369 (Print) 1540-3602 (Online) Journal homepage: https://www.tandfonline.com/loi/wjhm20 “And Now I’m Just Different, but There’s Nothing Actually Wrong With Me”: Asexual Marginalization and Resistance Kristina Gupta To cite this article: Kristina Gupta (2017) “And Now I’m Just Different, but There’s Nothing Actually Wrong With Me”: Asexual Marginalization and Resistance, Journal of Homosexuality, 64:8, 991-1013, DOI: 10.1080/00918369.2016.1236590 To link to this article: https://doi.org/10.1080/00918369.2016.1236590 Published with license by Taylor & Francis.© 2017 Kristina Gupta. Accepted author version posted online: 15 Sep 2016. Published online: 01 Nov 2016. Submit your article to this journal Article views: 5765 View related articles View Crossmark data Citing articles: 9 View citing articles Full Terms & Conditions of access and use can be found at https://www.tandfonline.com/action/journalInformation?journalCode=wjhm20 JOURNAL OF HOMOSEXUALITY 2017, VOL. 64, NO. 8, 991–1013 http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/00918369.2016.1236590 “And Now I’m Just Different, but There’s Nothing Actually Wrong With Me”: Asexual Marginalization and Resistance Kristina Gupta, PhD Department of Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies, Wake Forest University, Winston-Salem, North Carolina, USA ABSTRACT KEYWORDS This article explores the relationship between contemporary Asexuality; compulsory asexual lives and compulsory sexuality, or the privileging of sexu- sexuality; identity; ality and the marginalizing of nonsexuality. Drawing on 30 in-depth marginalization; resistance; interviews, I identify four ways the asexually identified individuals in sexual norms; stigma this study saw themselves as affected by compulsory sexuality: pathologization, isolation, unwanted sex and relationship conflict, and the denial of epistemic authority. I also identify five ways these asexually identified individuals disrupted compulsory sexuality: adopting a language of difference and a capacity to describe asexuality; deemphasizing the importance of sexuality in human life; developing new types of nonsexual relationships; constituting asexuality as a sexual orientation or identity; and engaging in community building and outreach. I argue that some of these practices offer only a limited disruption of compulsory sexuality, but some of these practices pose a radical challenge to sexual norms by calling into question the widespread assumption that sexuality is a necessary part of human flourishing. In the past two decades, the advent of the Internet has allowed for the emergence of new sexual identities, including asexuality. The largest online community for individuals who identify as asexual, the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN), has defined an asexual person as someone “who does not experience sexual attraction.” There is a great deal of diversity within the online asexual community in terms of identification and sexual practice (Carrigan, 2011). Contemporary asexual identities and communities should be of interest to scholars in the field of sexuality studies because they differ from other minority sexual identities and communities in several key respects. In many cases, minority sexual communities have challenged what they perceive to be the “sex- negativity” or “erotophobia” of contemporary Western society and have cele- brated nonnormative forms of sexual pleasure (see, for example, Rubin, 1984). Contemporary asexual communities challenge different aspects of Western sexual norms—identifying the ways in which “pro-sex” aspects of contemporary CONTACT Kristina Gupta [email protected] Department of Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies, Wake Forest University, Tribble Hall, A115, P.O. Box 7365, Winston-Salem, NC 27109, USA. © 2017 Kristina Gupta. Published with license by Taylor & Francis. This is an Open Access article distributed under the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives License (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/), which permits non-commercial re-use, distribution, and reproduction in any medium, provided the original work is properly cited, and is not altered, transformed, or built upon in any way. 992 K. GUPTA Western society can negatively affect asexually identified individuals and potentially undermining any naturalization of sexual attraction as a universal motivating force or as an essential component of adult identity. There is a small but growing body of scholarship investigating the relationship between asexual identities and contemporary Western sexual norms. A number of scholars studying asexuality have argued that although Western society is certainly “sex negative” in some ways, Western society also systematically privileges sexual identifications, desires, and activities while marginalizing different forms of non- sexuality, to the detriment of asexually identified individuals (for example, Chasin, 2013;Emens,2014;Gupta,2015a). According to some scholars, asexual commu- nity formation poses a challenge to this society-wide system of “compulsory sexuality” or “sex-normativity,” calling into question deeply held assumptions about sexuality and relationality (Chasin, 2013). Additionally, some scholars have argued that asexual community formation poses a challenge to “pro-sex” rhetoric within some feminist, queer, and disability studies scholarship and activism (Cerankowski & Milks, 2010;Gupta,2013b;Kim,2011). However, other scholars have questioned the extent to which contemporary asexual community formation actually challenges sexual norms. For example, Przybylo (2011) argued that current asexual activism, which seeks public recog- nition for asexuality as an innate sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction, does not pose a fundamental challenge to contemporary sexual structures. Przybylo wrote, “in its current reactive, binarized state, asexuality functions to anchor sexuality, not alter its logic” (Przybylo, 2011,p.452). Although much of this scholarly discussion has occurred at a theoretical level or has analyzed the discourse of AVEN and other online asexual com- munities, a growing number of qualitative studies have begun to investigate how asexually identified people engage with contemporary sexual norms in practice. A number of studies have explored one or more of the negative impacts of contemporary sexual norms on the lives of asexually identified individuals. According to this scholarship, asexually identified individuals can face pathologization (Foster & Scherrer, 2014; Robbins, Low, & Query, 2015), difficulties in relationships and social situations (Carrigan, 2011), and disbelief or denial of their asexual self-identification (MacNeela & Murphy, 2014). A smaller number of qualitative studies have explored how asexually identified individuals work to challenge contemporary Western sexual norms in practice. For example, based on an analysis of written survey responses from 102 indivi- duals recruited from AVEN, Scherrer argued that individuals who identify as asexual disrupt sexual norms in several ways; for example, by redefining sexual activities as nonsexual, asexually identified individuals disrupt the socially constructed distinction between the “sexual” and the “nonsexual.” In addition, according to Scherrer, by establishing new types of intimate relationships not based on sexuality, asexually identified individuals challenge Western society’s JOURNAL OF HOMOSEXUALITY 993 privileging of sexual relationships over nonsexual relationships and can under- mine Western society’s conflation of romantic and sexual attraction (Scherrer, 2008, 2010a, 2010b). Similarly, based on interviews with 15 individuals, Sloan argued that asexually identified individuals can challenge sexual expectations by practicing “kink” as a nonsexual activity (Sloan, 2015). Drawing on interviews with three asexually identified men, Przybylo argued that asexually identified men can disrupt Western notions of hegemonic masculinity (Przybylo, 2014). As a caveat, however, Cuthbert (2015) argued that although asexually identified indi- viduals may challenge some contemporary Western sexual norms, they may also reinforce ableism through the denial of any causal links between asexuality and disability (Cuthbert, 2015), and Owens (2014) argued that participants in online asexual communities often ignore or deny the importance of racism as a social system of power and privilege (Owens, 2014). This article seeks to further our understanding of the relationship between contemporary Western sexual norms and asexually identified individuals by using the concept of compulsory sexuality to analyze 30 in-depth interviews with individuals who identify as asexual. I first chart what interviewees identi- fied as the negative impacts of compulsory sexuality on their lives. Largely confirming earlier scholarship, here I offer a typology of these negative impacts: pathologization, isolation, unwanted sex and relationship conflict, and the denial of epistemic authority. I then discuss how interviewees explicitly or implicitly challenged, resisted, or defied aspects of compulsory sexuality in their discourse and described praxis. Confirming and expanding on existing scholarship, here I offer a typology of these forms of challenge, resistance, and defiance: adopting a language of difference and capacity to describe asexuality; deemphasizing the importance of sexuality in human life; developing new types of relationships not centered on sexual activity; constituting
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