Coming out of the Closet : Young Gay Men's Experiences in the Process of Coming Out

Total Page:16

File Type:pdf, Size:1020Kb

Coming out of the Closet : Young Gay Men's Experiences in the Process of Coming Out Edith Cowan University Research Online Theses : Honours Theses 1996 Coming Out of the Closet : Young Gay Men's Experiences in the Process of Coming Out Ronald Macdonald Edith Cowan University Follow this and additional works at: https://ro.ecu.edu.au/theses_hons Part of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Studies Commons Recommended Citation Macdonald, R. (1996). Coming Out of the Closet : Young Gay Men's Experiences in the Process of Coming Out. https://ro.ecu.edu.au/theses_hons/710 This Thesis is posted at Research Online. https://ro.ecu.edu.au/theses_hons/710 Edith Cowan University Copyright Warning You may print or download ONE copy of this document for the purpose of your own research or study. The University does not authorize you to copy, communicate or otherwise make available electronically to any other person any copyright material contained on this site. You are reminded of the following: Copyright owners are entitled to take legal action against persons who infringe their copyright. A reproduction of material that is protected by copyright may be a copyright infringement. Where the reproduction of such material is done without attribution of authorship, with false attribution of authorship or the authorship is treated in a derogatory manner, this may be a breach of the author’s moral rights contained in Part IX of the Copyright Act 1968 (Cth). Courts have the power to impose a wide range of civil and criminal sanctions for infringement of copyright, infringement of moral rights and other offences under the Copyright Act 1968 (Cth). Higher penalties may apply, and higher damages may be awarded, for offences and infringements involving the conversion of material into digital or electronic form. COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET YOUNG GAY MEN'S EXPERIENCES IN THE PROCESS OF COMING OUT by Ronald Macdonald A Thesis submitted in partial fulfilment of the requirements for the Award of Bachelor of Social Science (Youth Work) Honours At the Faculty of Health & Human Sciences, Edith Cowan University July 1996 USE OF THESIS The Use of Thesis statement is not included in this version of the thesis. ABSTRACT Coming out of the closet is a decision that all young gay men consider, however there has been little recent research undertaken which investigates this phenomenon. The purpose of this qualitative study is to provide an account of young men's experiences in the process of coming out and a critical analysis of the influences of cultural, political and social factors which impinge on the process. A phenomenological method (utilising Colaizzi's procedural steps) will be employed to collect data and to extrapolate common themes and meanings. A purposeful sample of seven young gay men were interviewed. Data was collected from taped interviews and the researcher's field notes. The research findings will add new knowledge to youth studies research as well as providing a basis for ongoing research in the area of gay studies. 3 Declaration I certifY that this thesis does not incorporate without acknowledgement any material previously submitted for a degree or diploma in any institution of higher education; and that to the best of my knowledge and belief it does not contain any m•terial previously published or written by another person except where due reference is made in the text. Signature Date ....... ~./..-5./t..k. .................. .. 4 .. Acknowledgements I would like to express my appreciation to the people who have helped, supported and encouraged me in the presentation of this research study. I particularly wish to thank my supervisor Trudi Cooper, who has been a constant source of practical and emotional support and guidance. Thanks Trudi. This undertaking would not have been possible without the young men who so openly and honestly shared their experiences with me. It was my privilege to have l;.een permitted entry into their lives, and I would like to thank them all for their participation and coutribution. My thanks also extend to the staff both past and present in Youth Work Studies, whose insights and expertise have aided my own process of intellectual and personal growth and development. Thank you all. Finally, a special thanks to my partner Gary for his unfaltering support and belief in me. 5 .:,._ ··-,''. ·_. ,'-.. :- ---- ... :,.,..:. Table of Contents COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET .................................................................................................................... 1 YOUNG GAY MEN'S EXPERIENCES IN THE PROCESS OF COMING OUT .••...•................................. 1 ABSTRACT .......................................................................................................................................................... 3 Declaration ............................................................ ., .......................................................................................... 4 Acknowledgements............................................................................................................................................. 5 TABLE OF CONTENTS ..................................................................................................................................... 6 CHAPTER ONE ................................................................................................................................................... 9 INTRODUCTION ...................•..•...........................................................•......••••..................................•................ 9 THE BACKGROUND TO THE STUDY ................................................. , ...... , ............................................................... 12 THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE STUDY ........................................................................................................................ 13 THE PURPOSE OF THE STUDY ................................................................................................................................ 14 OBJECTIVES OF THE STUDY........................................................................ ...................................................... 14 RESEARCH QUESTIONS .................................................................. , ....................................................................... 15 DEFINITION OF TERMS ....................................................... , .................................................................................. 15 CHAPTER TWO ..........................................................•........................................•......................................••.... 17 THEORETICAL FRAMEWORK AND METHOD .........•..............................................•.............................. 17 THE FUNCTIONS OF THEORY,, .............................................................................................................................. 17 THE NATURE OF ESSENTIALISM ............................................................................................................................ 18 SOCIAL CONSTRUCTION THEORY .......................................................................................................................... 22 METHOD OF INVESTIGATION ................................................................................................................................. 25 Design.............................................................................................................................................................. 26 Sample ............................................................................................................................................................. 28 Procedure ........................................................................................................................................................ 31 Limitations ...................................................................................................................................................... 36 Ethical considerations ........................................................... ......................................................................... 38 Pilot study ........................................................................................................................................................ 39 Thllkl. Selected Examples ofSignificant Statements and Corresponding Formulated Meanings ................ 42 CHAPTER THREE .........................................................................................................•.......................•......•... 45 THE RESEARCH FINDINGS ..................................................................................•...........................•........... 45 THE SCHEMATIC STRUCTURE ......................................................... ,, .. , .................................................................. 45 Figure I. Diagram ofschematic struc:lure of the seven categories ofthemes ................................................. 46 CATEGORY I. TilE INFLUENCE OF MAINSTREAM HETEROSEXUAL CULTURE ........................................................ 47 The Family ....................................................................................................................................................... 48 The Education System ...................................................................................................................................... 52 The Woriforce ...............................................................................................................................................
Recommended publications
  • The Trevor Project’S Coming Out: a Handbook Are At
    COMING OUT A Handbook for LGBTQ Young People CONTENTS IDENTITY 4 HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS 17 THE BASICS 4 SELF-CARE 18 What Is Sex Assigned at Birth? 5 Checking in on Your Mental Health 19 What Is Gender? 5 Warning Signs 19 Gender Identity 6 RESOURCES 20 Gender Expression 7 Transitioning 8 TREVOR PROGRAMS 21 What Is Sexual Orientation? 9 Map Your Own Identity 21 Sexual Orientation 10 Sexual/Physical Attraction 11 Romantic Attraction 12 Emotional Attraction 13 COMING OUT 14 Planning Ahead 14 Testing The Waters 15 Environment 15 Timing 15 Location 15 School 16 Support 16 Safety Around Coming Out 16 2 Exploring your sexual orientation Some people may share their identity with a few trusted friends online, some may choose to share and/or gender identity can bring up a lot with a counselor or a trusted family member, and of feelings and questions. Inside this handbook, others may want everyone in their life to know we will work together to explore your identity, about their identity. An important thing to know what it might be like to share your identity with is that for a lot of people, coming out doesn’t just others, and provide you with tools and guiding happen once. A lot of folks find themselves com- questions to help you think about what coming ing out at different times to different people. out means to you. It is all about what works for you, wherever you The Trevor Project’s Coming Out: A Handbook are at. The things you hear about coming out for LGBTQ Young People is here to help you nav- may make you feel pressured to take steps that igate questions around your identity.
    [Show full text]
  • LGBT History
    LGBT History Just like any other marginalized group that has had to fight for acceptance and equal rights, the LGBT community has a history of events that have impacted the community. This is a collection of some of the major happenings in the LGBT community during the 20th century through today. It is broken up into three sections: Pre-Stonewall, Stonewall, and Post-Stonewall. This is because the move toward equality shifted dramatically after the Stonewall Riots. Please note this is not a comprehensive list. Pre-Stonewall 1913 Alfred Redl, head of Austrian Intelligence, committed suicide after being identified as a Russian double agent and a homosexual. His widely-published arrest gave birth to the notion that homosexuals are security risks. 1919 Magnus Hirschfeld founded the Institute for Sexology in Berlin. One of the primary focuses of this institute was civil rights for women and gay people. 1933 On January 30, Adolf Hitler banned the gay press in Germany. In that same year, Magnus Herschfeld’s Institute for Sexology was raided and over 12,000 books, periodicals, works of art and other materials were burned. Many of these items were completely irreplaceable. 1934 Gay people were beginning to be rounded up from German-occupied countries and sent to concentration camps. Just as Jews were made to wear the Star of David on the prison uniforms, gay people were required to wear a pink triangle. WWII Becomes a time of “great awakening” for queer people in the United States. The homosocial environments created by the military and number of women working outside the home provide greater opportunity for people to explore their sexuality.
    [Show full text]
  • HRC Coming out As Trans Guide
    The National Center for Transgender Equality is a national social justice organization devoted to ending discrimination and violence against transgender people through education and advocacy on national issues of importance to transgender people. By empowering transgender people and our allies to educate and influence policymakers and others, NCTE facilitates a strong and clear voice for transgender equality in our nation’s capital and around the country. NCTE is a 501(c)3 organization. For more information, please visit www.NCTEquality.org. The Human Rights Campaign Coming Out Project is a program designed to help gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people come out and start living openly. The HRC Coming Out Project also creates resources to help GLBT and straight-supportive people talk about their support for equality at home, at work and in their communities. Visit www.hrc.org/comingout for more information. All photos in this guide are the work of Mariette Pathy Allen. HRC and NCTE thank her for providing these powerful images. TRANSGENDER COMING OUT AS OUT COMING Remember, there’s Contents no right or wrong way to come out or live openly. You decide how, where 2 Welcome and when based on what’s right for you. 4 Being Open With Yourself 6 Deciding to Tell Others 8 A Note On Transitioning 12 Making a Coming Out Plan 15 Having the Conversation 18 For Family and Friends 21 The Coming Out Continuum 22 Ten Things Every American Ought To Know 24 Glossary of Terms 26 Some Myths and Facts 28 A Message from Joe Solmonese 29 A Message from Mara Keisling This guide was designed to help you and your Welcome loved ones through that process in realistic and practical terms.
    [Show full text]
  • Public Opinion and Discourse on the Intersection of LGBT Issues and Race the Opportunity Agenda
    Opinion Research & Media Content Analysis Public Opinion and Discourse on the Intersection of LGBT Issues and Race The Opportunity Agenda Acknowledgments This research was conducted by Loren Siegel (Executive Summary, What Americans Think about LGBT People, Rights and Issues: A Meta-Analysis of Recent Public Opinion, and Coverage of LGBT Issues in African American Print and Online News Media: An Analysis of Media Content); Elena Shore, Editor/Latino Media Monitor of New America Media (Coverage of LGBT Issues in Latino Print and Online News Media: An Analysis of Media Content); and Cheryl Contee, Austen Levihn- Coon, Kelly Rand, Adriana Dakin, and Catherine Saddlemire of Fission Strategy (Online Discourse about LGBT Issues in African American and Latino Communities: An Analysis of Web 2.0 Content). Loren Siegel acted as Editor-at-Large of the report, with assistance from staff of The Opportunity Agenda. Christopher Moore designed the report. The Opportunity Agenda’s research on the intersection of LGBT rights and racial justice is funded by the Arcus Foundation. The statements made and views expressed are those of The Opportunity Agenda. Special thanks to those who contributed to this project, including Sharda Sekaran, Shareeza Bhola, Rashad Robinson, Kenyon Farrow, Juan Battle, Sharon Lettman, Donna Payne, and Urvashi Vaid. About The Opportunity Agenda The Opportunity Agenda was founded in 2004 with the mission of building the national will to expand opportunity in America. Focused on moving hearts, minds, and policy over time, the organization works with social justice groups, leaders, and movements to advance solutions that expand opportunity for everyone. Through active partnerships, The Opportunity Agenda synthesizes and translates research on barriers to opportunity and corresponding solutions; uses communications and media to understand and influence public opinion; and identifies and advocates for policies that improve people’s lives.
    [Show full text]
  • LGBTQ+ Pride Marches Forward
    Kearney, Chicago Kearney, Photo by Elizabeth Clifton Unstoppable for 50 years: LGBTQ+ pride marches forward The absence of pride parades Police regularly raided gay clubs and published the names of those arrested in order to punish won’t slow down a community them and ensure they would be fired the next day. that drives to celebrate and be Stonewall was not the first riot to push back against celebrated—authentically on the systematic police oppression of the LGBTQ+ community. For a decade prior to Stonewall there its own terms. were various uprisings against police brutality June 28, 2020 is the 50th Anniversary of the original including the May 1959 Cooper Do-nuts riot in L.A. New York City Christopher Street Liberation Day and July 1966 Compton’s Cafeteria riot in San march, a memorial to the first full year after the Francisco. These pioneers of queer rights threw their Stonewall uprising and the founding of today’s bodies against the status quo and tacit acceptance LGBTQ+ rights movement. that queer people somehow didn’t deserve legal equality and justice. Over the past 50 years, this powerful march has been one of the most visible symbols of what has evolved The struggle for human rights is an exercise in into Pride Month—an annual public proclamation of universal empowerment. Many members of the collective strength the global LGBTQ+ community LGBTQ+ community are persons of color, but that’s holds to affirm itself and demonstrate its collective not the point. As long as discrimination of any power to society at large.
    [Show full text]
  • Media Reference Guide
    media reference guide NINTH EDITION | AUGUST 2014 GLAAD MEDIA REFERENCE GUIDE / 1 GLAAD MEDIA CONTACTS National & Local News Media Sports Media [email protected] [email protected] Entertainment Media Religious Media [email protected] [email protected] Spanish-Language Media GLAAD Spokesperson Inquiries [email protected] [email protected] Transgender Media [email protected] glaad.org/mrg 2 / GLAAD MEDIA REFERENCE GUIDE TABLE OF CONTENTS INTRODUCTION FAIR, ACCURATE & INCLUSIVE 4 GLOSSARY OF TERMS / LANGUAGE LESBIAN / GAY / BISEXUAL 5 TERMS TO AVOID 9 TRANSGENDER 12 AP & NEW YORK TIMES STYLE 21 IN FOCUS COVERING THE BISEXUAL COMMUNITY 25 COVERING THE TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY 27 MARRIAGE 32 LGBT PARENTING 36 RELIGION & FAITH 40 HATE CRIMES 42 COVERING CRIMES WHEN THE ACCUSED IS LGBT 45 HIV, AIDS & THE LGBT COMMUNITY 47 “EX-GAYS” & “CONVERSION THERAPY” 46 LGBT PEOPLE IN SPORTS 51 DIRECTORY OF COMMUNITY RESOURCES 54 GLAAD MEDIA REFERENCE GUIDE / 3 INTRODUCTION Fair, Accurate & Inclusive Fair, accurate and inclusive news media coverage has played an important role in expanding public awareness and understanding of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) lives. However, many reporters, editors and producers continue to face challenges covering these issues in a complex, often rhetorically charged, climate. Media coverage of LGBT people has become increasingly multi-dimensional, reflecting both the diversity of our community and the growing visibility of our families and our relationships. As a result, reporting that remains mired in simplistic, predictable “pro-gay”/”anti-gay” dualisms does a disservice to readers seeking information on the diversity of opinion and experience within our community. Misinformation and misconceptions about our lives can be corrected when journalists diligently research the facts and expose the myths (such as pernicious claims that gay people are more likely to sexually abuse children) that often are used against us.
    [Show full text]
  • Anti-LGBT Backlash and the Shifting Public Opinion on LGBT Rights in Contemporary Russia: a Case Study
    University of Central Florida STARS Honors Undergraduate Theses UCF Theses and Dissertations 2019 Anti-LGBT Backlash and the Shifting Public Opinion on LGBT Rights in Contemporary Russia: A Case Study Sean T. Skillings University of Central Florida Part of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Studies Commons Find similar works at: https://stars.library.ucf.edu/honorstheses University of Central Florida Libraries http://library.ucf.edu This Open Access is brought to you for free and open access by the UCF Theses and Dissertations at STARS. It has been accepted for inclusion in Honors Undergraduate Theses by an authorized administrator of STARS. For more information, please contact [email protected]. Recommended Citation Skillings, Sean T., "Anti-LGBT Backlash and the Shifting Public Opinion on LGBT Rights in Contemporary Russia: A Case Study" (2019). Honors Undergraduate Theses. 634. https://stars.library.ucf.edu/honorstheses/634 ANTI-LGBT BACKLASH AND THE SHIFTING PUBLIC OPINION ON LGBT RIGHTS IN CONTEMPORARY RUSSIA: A CASE STUDY by SEAN SKILLINGS A thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the Honors in the Major Program in International and Global Studies in the College of Sciences and in the Burnett Honors College at the University of Central Florida Orlando, Florida Fall Term, 2019 Thesis Chair: Bruce Wilson, Ph.D. ACKNOWLDGEMENTS I greatly appreciate Dr. Bruce Wilson, my thesis chair, for his patience, efforts, and guidance throughout this project. Without his dedication to the field and to the topic of this project, this would not be possible. I am grateful for the help of my committee member, Dr.
    [Show full text]
  • About Outing: Public Discourse, Private Lives
    Washington University Law Review Volume 73 Issue 4 January 1995 About Outing: Public Discourse, Private Lives Katheleen Guzman University of Oklahoma Follow this and additional works at: https://openscholarship.wustl.edu/law_lawreview Part of the First Amendment Commons Recommended Citation Katheleen Guzman, About Outing: Public Discourse, Private Lives, 73 WASH. U. L. Q. 1531 (1995). Available at: https://openscholarship.wustl.edu/law_lawreview/vol73/iss4/2 This Article is brought to you for free and open access by the Law School at Washington University Open Scholarship. It has been accepted for inclusion in Washington University Law Review by an authorized administrator of Washington University Open Scholarship. For more information, please contact [email protected]. ABOUT OUTING: PUBLIC DISCOURSE, PRIVATE LIVES KATHELEEN GUZMAN* Out of sight, out of mind. We're here. We're Queer. Get used to it. You made your bed. Now lie in it.' I. INTRODUCTION "Outing" is the forced exposure of a person's same-sex orientation. While techniques used to achieve this end vary,2 the most visible examples of outing are employed by gay activists in publications such as The Advocate or OutWeek,4 where ostensibly, names are published to advance a rights agenda. Outing is not, however, confined to fringe media. The mainstream press has joined the fray, immortalizing in print "the love[r] that dare[s] not speak its name."' The rules of outing have changed since its national emergence in the early 1990s. As recently as March of 1995, the media forced a relatively unknown person from the closet.6 The polemic engendered by outing * Associate Professor of Law, University of Oklahoma College of Law.
    [Show full text]
  • Coming out As Trans
    Coming Out Trans To Your Parents & Family When you come out to your parents • You will probably still have the same • Your love life - what do you expect as a transgendered person, they need corny sense of humor. about your marriage, current to know that: partner, future type/gender of • You will still love them, music, cats, partner. Might as well be frank • You still love them. loud shirts, short hair, etc. here, even if you just don’t know. • You are not doing this to hurt • You will still work, go to college, (I tell my friends I never cared them. keep your friends, go to church, and about life after death, but love after love your children..... (things that are • You’ve had these feelings since transition - THAT concerns me...) important to them)... you were _________________ years • You realize they may go through old. • You might also change in some ways an emotional process, too -- shock, - voice, hair, walk, talk, dress, etc. Be • You resisted coming out to denial, bargaining, anger, guilt, honest about what changes to expect. yourself for ____________________ sadness, acceptance. Know these years. • You might look as though you were symptoms and help them also to your twin brother/sister. recognize them. • You really struggled with it, but it wouldn’t go away; - it’s SUCH a • You will give them all the time they Believe it or not, some parents even compelling feeling! need to get used to the new you. You get to a stage of celebration! We didn’t get used to the idea overnight wouldn't want to change our “new” • You are now pretty seriously yourself.
    [Show full text]
  • Coming Out: an Overview Prejudice to People Who Break These Social Norms
    In addition, many societies attach stigma or Coming Out: An Overview prejudice to people who break these social norms. Transphobia, homophobia, biphobia and Sexuality, Sexual Identity or Sexual other prejudices against LGBTQ+ people are Orientation refer to an individual’s sense of who often learned by many people, including those they may be romantically or sexually attracted that may be considering coming out. to or desire. Challenging these ideas is often the first step in Gender identity refers to an individual’s sense of coming out to yourself. The coming out process what their gender is in terms of masculinity, often involves many such challenges, and femininity, something in between or outside of a typically centers on questioning or exploring Coming gender binary altogether. one’s relationship to sexuality, gender identity and sexual/gender expression. Who do I want Expression refers to an individual’s way of to date? What gender(s) am I? How do I want to dressing, appearing and behaving in the world. look? These are normal questions people often Some people express their sexuality and gender ask themselves during the process of coming out. identity through these ways, while others do not. One safe way of beginning to come out to Coming out is a process of making public an Out yourself is through reading about how others individual’s identit(ies) that may not conform to have dealt with similar experiences and feelings societal norms of sexuality or gender. These – the internet can be a good place to start. identities may include lesbian, gay, bisexual, Seeing a therapist or medical professional can transgender, queer (LGBTQ) or any other sexual also be helpful in helping you grapple with these and/or gender identities that an individual finds important questions.
    [Show full text]
  • The Process of Coming out Sexual Violence & Individuals Who Identify As Lgbtq © National Sexual Violence Resource Center and Pennsylvania Coalition Against Rape 2012
    The process of coming out Sexual violence & individuals who identify as lgbtq © National Sexual Violence Resource Center and Pennsylvania Coalition Against Rape 2012. All rights reserved. This document was supported by Cooperative Agreement # 5VF1CE001751-03 from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Its contents are solely the responsibility of the authors and do not necessarily represent the official views of the CDC. This project is supported by Grant No. 2010-SW-AX-0019 awarded by the Office on Violence Against Women, U.S. Department of Justice. The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this publication are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Department of Justice, Office on Violence Against Women. The content of this publication may be reprinted with the following acknowledgement: This material was reprinted, with permission, from the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s publication entitled The process of coming out: Sexual violence & individuals who identify as LGBTQ. This guide is available by visiting www.nsvrc.org or use your smartphone to scan the QR Code (at left) for more information online. the process of coming out sexual violence & individuals who identify as lgbtq oming out is the process that some individuals who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, Cqueer or questioning (LGBTQ) experience as they tell themselves, family, friends, and society about their sexual orientation or gender identity. For individuals who identify as LGBTQ, the coming out process can be both difficult and liberating. The coming out process is different for (HRC, 2006). Coming out is an act of bravery, everyone.
    [Show full text]
  • 1 Teaching LGBTQ History and Heritage Leila J. Rupp LGBTQ
    1 Teaching LGBTQ History and Heritage Leila J. Rupp LGBTQ Heritage Initiative: Theme Study Chapter Imagine a world in which students could visit not just Civil War battlefields that raise the profound issues of slavery and what it means for states to be united, but also buildings that housed places that came to feel like home to people marginalized because of sexuality and gender, places that were important enough to defend against onslaughts by the police. That is the possibility that teaching the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) past through historic sites offers. The houses where famous and less known lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people lived, the commercial establishments they patronized and defended, and even places that mark a history of discrimination and violence offer the opportunity to make LGBTQ history a part of US history in a way that makes a difference for students, wherever they are learning history. A more inclusive history certainly matters to LGBTQ students, who suffer not just from bullying and other forms of discrimination but also from being deprived of a past. Many years ago, I was teaching an introductory US history course when I ran into a student from the class who was working in the local gay restaurant. He told me that he had never heard of Stonewall until I talked about it in a lecture on social movement of the 1960s. He was so excited to hear a mention of the gay past in a history class that he told his roommate about it. He also came out, since they had never discussed their sexual identities, and then the roommate came out to him.
    [Show full text]