Black Box Recorder
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“My job consists of basically masking my contempt...” 20th March 2003 CRASH LANDING The Edge gets the lowdown on Britain’s sickest popstars, Black BOX RecOrder Kinesis... The Kills... Scarlet Soho... Brick Awards Results... Har Mar Superstar 20th March 2003 EDITORIAL Oh dear - it looks like the dem- THE EDGE ocratic process has been hijacked yet again, and no I’m not talking about the recent Student Union elections which I have no doubt were run in an entirely fair, uncorrupt and TOP unbiased manner. At least, that’s what I’ve been told to say by my lawyers. No, I am referring of course to the 10 annual Edge Brick Awards. Of NEWS with EDGE 3am Girl Rich Heap ANSWERS TO course The Edge did receive Porcelain-faced bassist he’s America’s lapdog, just like and roll record ever made.” Jack thousands upon thousands of HILLARY WOODS has left JJ72, everyone else... White has always refused to com- QUESTIONS IN votes for your favourite bands, which kind of means that no-one And on that subject, EMILY EAVIS ment on the spat that started SONG TITLES will be that interested in them (daughter of Glastonbury dictator when Adams covered White’s singers, films and all the rest of 1. WHO’S AFRAID OF THE BIG it, it turns out that all of them anymore. Apparently her decision and beard-no-moustache wearer songs, changing some of the lyr- had been filled in by young to quit was something to do with Michael) has put on a ‘One Big No’ ics, and, when Jack complained, BAD WOLF? - Unknown Mainly small mammals and Rich’s team of electoral cam- MARK GREANEY not being inter- protest gig, against the forthcom- called him “a little girl.” Ooooh... birds, both of which are second- paigners - allowing that band ested in girls or any input from ing war (oh come on, like it’s not it’s like Liam and Robbie all over ary food sources for both the of dubious quality (I refer of anyone else. Or did I just make going to happen...) Acts at the again. course to Queens of the Stone that up? Shepherds Bush Empire on 15th grey and the red wolf. Age) to be catapulted to the March included (well, if it hap- SHAVO ODADJIAN, bassist with lead in more than one impor- On less important news, pened... this went to press before SYSTEM OF A DOWN, is filing a 2. WHO LET THE DOGS OUT? - TONY BLAIR attempted to con- the actual event) PAUL WELLER, lawsuit against a security compa- tant award race. I guess the Baha Men only recompense is that my vince the younger generations, GARBAGE, FRAN HEALY, ny who, apparently, assaulted him Whoever had the key to the lawyers now inform me that it via MTV, that war in Iraq is justi- EVAN DANDO, BETH ORTON, during a SLIPKNOT gig on, err, kennel when they went missing. would be entirely legal to fied. The hour long debate show, FAITHLESS , 20th October 2001. God, that’s smash their heads in with a Is War The Answer?, was shown on MARK THOMAS,IAN MCCULLOCH ages ago. Can’t be bothered going large brick as long as it has an 6th April, where he took ques- and possibly others. But where into any more detail. After 3. Edge logo printed on the side. tions from a representative sam- are Blur? And Massive Attack? I all,being 28 and in a rock band, he Oh well, I guess it could have ple of 40 18-24 worlds. He looked mean, they’re been in the news a should be able to look after him- been worse - if you’d all both- like an arse, however, when he lot campaigning against the war. self. Not like the fan at Norwegian ered to vote we might have had to give vague answers to the Now, I’m not saying they’re hypo- death metal band MAYHEM’s gig, had Toploader winning or questions that people actually crites... I’m just stating a fact...after who had his head fractured by a something. wanted to ask (a.k.a. “Is the war for all, even white rap idiots flying sheep skull. PER KRISTIAN Just in case anyone’s interest- oil?”, “Will you go to war without a THE BEASTIE BOYS released an HAGEN, 25, was struck by the fly- ed (which I am coming to seri- second UN resolution?”, “What are anti-war song, In A World Gone ing animal skull after MANIAC (the ously doubt) my vote for best the moral implications of all the Mad, through their official web- lead singer... probably not his real live act of the year goes to civilian tragedies?”, “What will the site. name) carved up a sheep and the Blair and Blunkett for their Iraqi regime be replaced with?” head just flew off. The incident entirely miscalculated jam ses- etc.) Whether this has actually On lighter news, RYAN ADAMS has been called unfortunate and sion at that primary school. changed anyone’s opinions or, has ended his feud with the injured fan has been prom- Oh well,‘til next time crucially, given Blair any credibili- THE WHITE STRIPES by saying that ised a ticket to a forthcoming Tim ty amongst ‘the kids’ is sketchy... The Stripes’ forthcoming album, Mayhem gig. Nice. actually, it’s not. They still think Elephant, “may be the best rock THE EDGE TEAM Editor: Tim Houghton Assistant Editor: Rich Heap Film: Nina Dubravec COMPETITION Dance: Rich Madgwick As conclusively proved by The Edge, wins. our announcement of this year’s Brick Awards Poll, The Edge is every- With: Alex Mattinson, Rob body’s favourite music mag. Barbour, Chloe Williams, Kerry However, just to show that Patterson, Joe Wiggins, here at The Edge we aren’t afraid to Jonathan Curtis-Brignell, Luke let someone else have a try at this Crisell, James Graham, Antony whole music journalism lark, we’re Nicholls, Mike Cole, Russell gonna help brand new music maga- Wood, Ian Brewer, Felicity Hull, zine ‘BANG’ on their way by giving Lucinda Wilkinson, Phil Hoile, away One Year’S Free Subscription to one lucky Edge Max McGee, Ricky Spaven, reader, (not to mention the associat- Purdy Wickham, Sarah Pearce, ed free publicity in the hallowed Johnnie Macson, Bridie Edge pages.). We also have five Bang Ashton, Jake Smokcum, Ben goody bags to give away to runners Bratchell up. All you have to do to stand a chance of winning is complete the following sentence in no more than The Edge 25 words... S.U.S.U I LOVE CRAIG DAVID BECAUSE... Highfield Southampton Most original entry, as voted for by S017 1BJ PA G E 2 20th March 2003 THE BIG GIG GUIDE THE SOUTH COAST MAY NOT BE GREAT, BUT IT’S NOT THE CULTURAL WASTELAND THAT EVERYONE THINKS... Wed 26th Mar - Pitchshifter @ belong after 2001’s inexplicable Wed 9th Apr - Burning Brides @ Tue 29th Apr - Less Than Jake @ Wed 7th May - Melanie C @ S.U.S.U. success. Twunts. Joiners Southampton Guildhall Southampton Guildhall Mon 31st Apr - The Faint @ Queens Of The Stone Age like Apparently she’s the most suc- Thu 27th Mar - Liberty X @ Portsmouth Wedgewood Rooms them. Weds 30th Apr - The Soledad cessful former Spice Girl and Portsmouth Guildhall Simply fantastic. Go. Go. Go. Mon 14th Apr - The Bandits @ Brothers @ Joiners she’s still crap. Well, at least she’s The losers from Popstars or one Joiners One of Phil Datsun’s favourite the main one against a reunion of those sort of Pete Waterman Tues 1st Apr - Sugababes @ Coral-esque quirksome pot-influ- bands. He advised me to go and tour so it can’t be all bad. peddling ITV shows for talent- Southampton Guildhall enced Scouse indie. Try it, you see them, and he’d advise you the less egocentric chancers. I’ve been told they’re quite big so might like it. same. But he hasn’t spoken to Sun 11th May - The Raveonettes put on your bright white clothes you. And I’ve met him. Please for- @ Portsmout Wedgewood Fri 28th Mar - Finch @ and fake gold jewellery and get Mon 14th Apr - The Rapture @ give my smugness Rooms Portsmouth Pyramids some R ‘n’ B. Portmsouth Wedgewood Rooms Sat 3rd May - The Wildhearts @ It’s really beginning to piss me My CLOSE (‘slose’ was a mistake, It was meant to be at the Joiners, Portsmouth Pyramids off that The Wedgewood Rooms so shoot me pedants) personal Wed 2nd Apr - The 22-20s but moved. Boycott it on princi- is getting all of the good bands friend Rob Barbour recom- @ Joiners ple. Sun 4th May - Nada Surf @ doing the rounds on the toilet mends them highly. Blues for the modern era. And Portsmouth Wedgewood Rooms circuit (except The 22-20s and good. You really should see them Wed 16th Apr - The Basement @ Nice, but a bit too boring for my The Soledad Brothers) and it Sun 30th Mar - Beth Orton + (well, so I’ve been told.) Joiners hardcore rockin’ ass. If you like should really annoy you too. I’m Brendan Benson @ Portsmouth melodic indie, then you could going to go and sulk now. Guildhall Wed 2nd Apr - Daniel Bedingfield Thurs 17th Apr - The Warlocks @ well love ‘em. Okay, so Beth Orton is boring, @ Southampton Guildhall Portsmouth Wedgewood Rooms Mon 12th May - Violent Delight but Brendan Benson is a Jack Professional testicleless tosser Overrated and boring... Tues 6th May - Hell Is For Heroes @ @ Joiners White favourite, which may makes it big with some rubbish Portsmouth Pyramids This isn’t enough to placate me.