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Rebbe and the Rebbetzin

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Rebbe and the Rebbetzin 87 YUD DALED KISLEV THE WEDDING OF THE REBBE AND THE REBBETZIN “This is the day when I began my everlasting bond to you.” The Rebbe in a sicha on his 25th wedding anniversary 88 A D AY TO R ECALL, A D AY TO R EMEMBER Chassidim are careful not to give original explanations or interpretations on the Tanya in particular and on Chassidus in general. However, the Rebbe noted numerous times that if in doing so, such a communication will cause someone to strengthen his service to Hashem, then the new idea should be expressed. This concept of being careful about not innovating something in the Torah is prevalent in all Jewish circles. They refer to the law of chodesh: new grain is forbidden before its proper time. In the farbrengen of Yud Daled Kislev 5739 (yWka,- 1978), the occasion of his golden (50th) wedding anniversary, the Rebbe explained why he was celebrating his anniversary in such a public manner. Since seeing that a gathering of one’s friends on such an occasion brings out not only good resolutions but also actions, the Rebbe said it is a proper thing to celebrate an anniversary (even though we do not find a hint or source for this in the Talmud.) During that farbrengen, the Rebbe also mentioned that it just so happened that on the occasion of the Frierdiker Rebbe’s golden anniversary, every day of that entire week (corresponding to the sheva brachos), another newly printed sefer was brought to the Rebbe Rayatz. It was evident to all present that it gave him much happiness. That year, chassidim farbrenged the entire week of the Rebbe’s sheva brachos. Since then, we all farbreng on the auspicious day of Yud Daled Kislev, strengthening and reinforcing the bond that began on this day in 5689 (yWpr,-1928) between the Rebbe and his chassidim. YUD D ALED K ISLEV 89 t the Yud Tes Kislev farbrengen of 5689 (yWpr,-1928), Awhich extended into the wee hours of the morning, the Frierdiker Rebbe announced that the farbrengen would also be serving as the sheva brochos for the chosson and kallah. During the farbrengen, the Frierdiker Rebbe turned to his gabbai, Reb Yechezkel Faigen swwhv,1 and instructed him to send a telegram to an acquaintance in Rostov. The acquaintance was requested to place a pidyon on the tzion of the Rebbe Rashab (the father of the Frierdiker Rebbe) stating that the Rebbe Rashab’s wish had now been fulfilled. What wish? The Rebbe Rashab had desired that his second granddaughter, Chaya Mushka, should marry the oldest son of Reb Levi Yitzchok, and now it had happened! Chassidim say2 that when the Rebbe Rashab was speaking with his wife, the Rebbetzin Shterna Sara, about possible shidduchim for their second granddaughter,3 the Rebbe Rashab had said, “We should think about the oldest son of Reb Levik.” While it is impossible to ascertain exactly when the Rebbe Rashab began considering the Rebbe for the shidduch, we do know that from the day of the Rebbe’s birth, the Rebbe Rashab showed a special interest in him. He sent no less than six telegrams on that day, with instructions concerning him.4 This interest continued throughout the Rebbe Rashab’s life. 1. Affectionately called Chatsha by the chassidim. sWhv is a Hebrew acronym for “Hashem should avenge his blood,” as he was killed in WWII by the Germans, may their name be erased. 2. See the Yiddishe Heim vol. 18 and L’sheima Ozen p. 156. It is also said that the Rebbetzin Shterna Sara wrote to the Frierdiker Rebbe’s mazkir, Reb Elchonon Dov Morosov sWhv, that she is pained that due to the internal situation in Russia, the shidduch cannot be finalized. She continued that she goes to the Ohel of her husband the Rebbe Rashab to daven that it be finalized. See Yemei Melech vol. 2, p. 892. 3. While we can assume that this was after the Rebbe Rashab arranged the shidduch of their oldest granddaughter Chana to the Rashag, we see from the rest of this paragraph it is not necessarily so. 4. See essay on Yud Alef Nissan on pp. 15-16. We should also note that the Rebbe Rashab was personally involved in the shidduch of Reb Levik and Rebbetzin Chana. 90 A D AY TO R ECALL, A D AY TO R EMEMBER Although the Rebbe’s father was very close to the Rebbe Rashab and went to Lubavitch on many occasions, and the Rebbe Rashab chose the Rebbe to be his future grandson-in- law (and subsequently the successor to his son the Frierdiker Rebbe), the Rebbe never saw the Rebbe Rashab.5 The Rebbe, at around the age of 22, first met the Frierdiker Rebbe in Krementchuk, in the summer of 1924 (or the previous summer in Kislavutzk), and then went to stay with him in Leningrad. After the Frierdiker Rebbe moved to Leningrad in 1924, the Rebbe’s mother, Rebbetzin Chana, came to visit her future daughter-in-law. During her visit it became known that the Rebbe would soon be the son-in-law of the Rebbe Rayatz.6 However, it was not officially announced, and the wedding did not take place for another five years.7 After his harrowing arrest and miraculous liberation in 1927,8 the Frierdiker Rebbe realized he must leave Russia. The Russian government, wishing to gain favor with her neighbors, begrudgingly allowed the Frierdiker Rebbe to emigrate to Latvia. Knowing that his situation was precarious, the Frierdiker Rebbe nevertheless made a 5. Why Reb Levik did not take the Rebbe with him on any of his numerous trips to the Rebbe Rashab we do not know. Perhaps it was similar to the Alter Rebbe, when the Baal Shem Tov told the Maggid, “I instructed his parents not to bring him to me as he is yours.” 6. The official shadchan was Rav Elichaim Althaus, who refused to accept any gratitude customarily given to the shadchan. In 5714 (sWha,-1913), on the Rebbe’s twenty-fifth anniversary, Reb Pinya Althaus knocked on the Rebbe’s door and told the Rebbe he is coming to collect his uncle’s shadchanus. The Rebbe asked, “What do you want [for shadchanus]? He answered, “A farbrengen.” That Shabbos, the Rebbe farbrenged. 7. This was due mainly to the unstability of the time and the Frierdiker Rebbe’s terrible financial situation, as the communists confiscated everything of worth from everyone. The Frierdiker Rebbe used the tremendous amount of money which was sent by chassidim and others to keep open the chederim, mikvaos, etc. Chassidim infer that while the weddings of the Frierdiker Rebbe’s other two daughters took place on a modest scale, the reason why the Frierdiker Rebbe was adamant that the Rebbe’s wedding be on a grand scale was that it should be befitting a Nassi. 8. See essay on Yud-Bais Tammuz II on pp. 138-141. YUD D ALED K ISLEV 91 stipulation: he told the officials that he would only leave on the condition that his immediate circle and his library be allowed to leave with him. His immediate circle made up quite a list, and of course on the list was the name of the Rebbe, son-in-law designate. When the official saw that, he remarked that it certainly would be no problem for the Lubavitcher Rebbe to find another match for his daughter, Chaya Mushka, and therefore this young man need not re- ceive permission to leave with the Rebbe Rayatz’s “entourage.” The Frierdiker Rebbe responded emphatically: “a son-in-law like this is impossible to find!” The Rebbe was then granted permission. Being that the Frierdiker Rebbe left Russia on the day after Sukkos, and the Rebbe was in Yekatrinoslav for Sukkos, they did not leave together. After Sukkos the Rebbe bid farewell to his father, never to see him again. His mother was allowed to accompany him to the border, and a few days later he came to the Frierdiker Rebbe in Riga, Latvia.9 When it became evident that the Russian government would not give Reb Levik and Rebbetzin Chana permission to leave Russian for even a few days to attend their son’s wedding, it was decided to set a wedding date. So one year later, on Monday, the sixth day10 of Kislev 5689 (ywwpr,-1928), the tana’im (engagement agreement) for the shidduch took place. The wedding date was set for eight days later, on Tuesday, the 14th of Kislev. Plans were made for the wedding to take place in the Yeshiva Tomchei Tmimim in Warsaw, Poland. 9. We should note that the Rebbe did not remain in Riga. Shortly afterwards, the Rebbe moved to Berlin, where he remained until 1934. See essay on Chof Ches Sivan on p. 60. Of course, from time to time he came to Riga. 10. (Author’s Note: Until recently it was believed that the tana’im took place on the third of Kislev. But I was told that those who saw the tana’im document which was recently published, the correct date is the sixth.) 92 A D AY TO R ECALL, A D AY TO R EMEMBER Chassidim say there were certain11 requests that the Frierdiker Rebbe asked of his future sons-in-law, among them: 1) to stay awake and learn all Thursday night 2) to stay awake and learn all Friday night 3) not to implant false teeth Later on, the Frierdiker Rebbe instructed the Rebbe to far- breng every Shabbos Mevorchim.12 The Frierdiker Rebbe sent out four different categories13 of invitations for the wedding: 1) He wrote a letter to the chassidim who were still in Russia14 requesting that on the wedding day, they farbreng and bless the chosson and kallah.
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