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Affection and Mercy: Kinship, State, and the Management of Marriage in Jordan by Geoffrey Fitzgibbon Hughes

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Affection and Mercy: Kinship, State, and the Management of Marriage in Jordan by Geoffrey Fitzgibbon Hughes Affection and Mercy: Kinship, State, and the Management of Marriage in Jordan by Geoffrey Fitzgibbon Hughes A dissertation submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy (Anthropology) in the University of Michigan 2015 Doctoral Committee: Professor Andrew J. Shryock, Chair Emerita Professor Gillian Feeley-Harnik Professor Frances S. Hasso, Duke University Professor Matthew Hull Acknowledgments Like all dissertations, my dissertation is the result of a collective project involving hundreds of different minds. In my case, this project and its more or less witting participants have spanned multiple languages across multiple continents, encompassing those responsible for my education and upbringing in the US as well as those Jordanians who graciously accepted me into their lives and taught me about their own lifeways. A full accounting of all of the debts I have incurred in the process of writing this dissertation would be impossible, but I hope these acknowledgments will somewhat suffice. My greatest debts are to my mother and father: the two people who gave me life. They were my first teachers, my first travel companions, and my most reliable, tireless, and consistent mentors. I am also deeply indebted to my adoptive Jordanian family, which includes countless individuals who have treated me as a brother, a cousin, an uncle, or a son over the years. Leading in generosity, I would like to thank Musa and Khaled Huwaytat and the rest of their families. The warmth and hospitality that they showed was superlative—even for a country in which warmth and hospitality are foremost national pastimes. I was also honored by the generosity of the houses of Abu Bassam, Abu Muhammed, Ishhada, and Abu Suleiman. I would further like to express how grateful I am to friends and teachers like Nader, Abu Riyadh, Ghassan, and Abu ‘Ala’. The various institutions I studied were also incredibly hospitable towards me. I was repeatedly struck by the professionalism and incisive wit of the employees I encountered at the Housing and Urban Development Corporation, the Sharia Courts, and the Chastity Society. ii Employees were also always exceedingly honest and self-critical, making me wary of thanking them by name lest their candor be used against them. Instead, I would like to thank the institutions themselves—trusting that the key figures who enabled my research know who they are and know how much I appreciate the risks they took to make this project happen. However, I am happy to acknowledge Ms. ‘Afnan and Abu Hassan from Jordan University’s archives for being some of the most helpful, knowledgeable, and generous archivists imaginable. Most historians I have talked to would give anything to work under the conditions that they helped to foster. The difficulties involved in thanking the myriad colleagues and professors who helped with the dissertation are hardly any less daunting than the task of thanking the countless Jordanians who facilitated my research. Andrew Shryock, my main impetus for coming to Michigan in the first place, was everything I could have asked for in an adviser: involved, supportive, and generous with his time. Much of the initial impetus for the project emerged from a series of classes I took with Matthew Hull. Gillian Feeley-Harnik has been inspiring teacher as well as an extremely careful and thoughtful reader. This dissertation would have been inconceivable without the benefit of her and Thomas Trautmann’s kinship seminar. Frances Hasso helped me think more deeply about how to balance the anthropological stakes of the dissertation with its area studies stakes. I would also like to thank Conrad Kottak, Henry Wright, Sally Thomason, Judith Irvine, Webb Keane, Damani Partridge, John Mitani, Krisztina Fehervary, Stephen Jackson, Youssef Youssef, Stuart Kirsch, and Alaina Lemon for giving me the intellectual tools I needed to take on this project. Of course, graduate students always learn at least as much from friends and peers as they do from professors. I owe a lot to my friend and mentor Warren Emerson, whose consistent iii correspondence while I was in the field was a constant source of insight, humor, and emotional support. I also owe a lot to all of my roommates and colleagues over the past seven years: James Meador, Stuart Strange, Katharina Erbe, Denise Dooley, Ujin Kim, Gregory Storms, Lamia Moghnie, Bryce Adams, and Alison Joersz. They fed me, listened patiently to my anxieties and, in most cases, read draft after draft of what became this dissertation. Hoda Bandeh-Ahmadi, Sandhya Narayanan, Chris Sargent, Nama Khalil, Kimberly Powers, Ismail Alatas, Bridget Guarasci, Lindsey Conklin, and Dan Birchok have also proven to be important interlocutors. Ashley Lemke, Bethany Hansen, Kristen Munnelly and Andrew Gurstelle were always willing to provide moral support and prevent my intellectual growth from being stunted by my anthropological subdisciplinary specialization. Saving the best for last, I would like to thank Blaire Andres, who has helped me throughout the dissertation project, reading drafts and believing in the project when even I had started to doubt it. Needless to say, errors are mine alone. iv Table of Contents Acknowledgments ii List of Tables vi List of Figures vii Introduction 1 Part I: The Home: Building a House and a Housing Market Chapter 1: The House 41 Chapter 2: The Housing Market 77 Part II: The Proposal: Personhood and the Construction of Moral Agents Chapter 3: The Delegation 103 Chapter 4: The Courthouse 135 Part III: The Wedding: Greedy Institutions and the Privatization of Joys Chapter 5: The Feast 164 Chapter 6: The Chastity Society 200 Conclusion: Affection and Mercy 236 Appendix: Findings of the Statistical Survey of Marriage Contracts 248 Bibliography 302 v List of Tables Table 1: Top Ten Places for Contract Signings (Madaba) 256 Table 2: Top Ten Most Prolific Contract-Writers (Amman) 258 Table 3: Top Ten Most Prolific Contract-Writers (Madaba) 259 Table 4: Residency in the Amman Sample 263 Table 5: Place of Birth in the Madaba Sample 263 Table 6: Residency in the Madaba Sample 264 Table 7: Social Status of Grooms (Amman) 268 Table 8: Social Status of Brides (Amman) 268 Table 9: The Social Status of Grooms (Madaba) 269 Table 10: The Social Status of Brides (Madaba) 269 Table 11: The Most Common Occupations for Grooms (Amman) 272 Table 12: Occupations for Brides (Amman) 272 Table 13: Occupations for Brides (Madaba) 273 Table 14: The Ten Most Common Occupations for Grooms (Madaba) 274 Table 15: Receiver of the Bridewealth (Amman) 282 Table 16: Agent of the Bride (Amman) 286 Table 17: Agent of the Groom (Amman) 287 Table 18: Who Agreed or Granted Permission? (Madaba) 288 vi List of Figures Figure 1: A diagram of a hypothetical tent 47 Figure 2: A scurrilous diagram of a neighboring tribe’s tents 50 Figure 3: Workmen laying the roof of the apartment 66 Figure 4: Shared commensality 73 Figure 5: Jordanian planners modeling household capacity to build housing 80 Figure 6: An abbreviated family tree of “Musa” 111 Figure 7: A pie chart displaying the relative prevalence of different kinds of divorce 161 Figure 8: The front of a 1920s era contract 250 Figure 9: The back of a 1920s era contract 251 Figure 10: A 2000s era contract 252 Figure 11: Distribution of Contracts by Month (Amman) 255 Figure 12: Distribution of Contracts by Month (Madaba) 255 Figure 13: Distribution of Contracts by Year (Amman) 255 Figure 14: Distribution of Contracts by Year (Madaba) 255 Figure 15: Where Contracts Happened (Madaba) 256 Figure 16: The Increasing Use of the Courthouse for Marital rituals 257 Figure 17: A Ranking of the Most Prolific Contract-Writers (Amman) 258 Figure 18: A Ranking of the Most Prolific Contract-Writers (Amman) 260 Figure 19: The Distribution of Grooms by Age (Amman) 261 Figure 20: The Distribution of Grooms by Age (Amman) 261 vii Figure 21: The Distribution of Brides by Age (Amman) 261 Figure 22: The Distribution of Brides by Age (Madaba) 261 Figure 23: Median Age of Marriage for Women (Amman) 262 Figure 24: Median Age of Marriage for Men (Amman) 262 Figure 25: Median Age of Marriage for Women (Madaba) 262 Figure 26: Median Age of Marriage for Men (Madaba) 262 Figure 27: The Stability of Brides 265 Figure 28: The Stability of Grooms 265 Figure 29: The Social Status of Grooms (Amman) 266 Figure 30: The Social Status of Brides (Amman) 267 Figure 31: The Social Status of Grooms (Madaba) 267 Figure 32: The Social Status of Brides (Madaba) 268 Figure 33: The Prevalence of Previously Married Women (Amman) 270 Figure 34: Bridewealth Word Count (Amman) 276 Figure 35: Bridewealth Word Count (Madaba) 277 Figure 36: Amount of Bridewealth Received 278 Figure 37: Color Coding of Upfront Bridewealth by Currency (Amman) 280 Figure 38: Color Coding of Delayed Bridewealth by Currency (Amman) 281 Figure 39: Receiver of the Upfront Bridewealth Payment 282 Figure 40: Color Coding of Upfront Bridewealth by Type (Madaba) 284 Figure 41: Delayed Bridewealth Payment 285 Figure 42: Who Served as Agents for Women? 286 Figure 43: Who Served as Agents for Men? 287 viii Figure 44: Who Agreed or Granted Permission? (Madaba) 288 Figure 45: Color Coding of How People Signed Contracts (Amman) 290 Figure 46: Color Coding of How People Signed Contracts (Madaba) 291 Figure 47: Frequency of 'Ingroup' vs. 'Outgroup' Marriages (Amman) 292 Figure 48: Frequency of 'Ingroup' vs. 'Outgroup' Marriages (Madaba) 292 ix Introduction “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” –Qur’an Surat ar-rum (30:21) In 1995, the above Qur’anic verse was added (with little fanfare) to the top of the form marriage contract issued by Jordan’s government-run Sharia Courts, which are responsible for regulating the family life of the 97% of Jordanians who are Muslim.
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