. 9 .W S1 6 00 7 2 May 1 - May

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week9.indd 1 26/4/06 6:15:52 PM  Blitz Magazine

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Blitz Magazine: Telephone: 02 9385 7715 Editor’s letter Fax: 02 9313 8626 Address: PO Box 173, Kingsford 2032 Level 1, Blockhouse, Lower Campus [email protected] Web: www.source.unsw.edu.au

Blitz Advertising: Advertising Artwork 12 days prior to publication. Bookings 20 days prior to publication. Rates and enquiries should be Cheating Hearts 6 directed to Charlotte O’Brien Phone: 9385 7331 Email: [email protected]

by Rob Gascoigne Contributions: Letters, articles, photos and other printable oth Elvis Presley and Karl Marx are matter are welcome. Please contact the on record as saying that a full life editor to discuss suitability. consists of three things: something After Attraction 22 to do, something to look forward Publisher: B Blitz is published each Monday of session by to and somebody to love. I think that’s a pretty accurate summation of things and I UNSW Source. love, LOVE, that those two very different men The views expressed herein are not came up with it independently of each other. necessarily the views of UNSW Source, It just makes the sentiment seem so much unlesas expressly stated. UNSW Source more genuine. accepts no responsibility for the accuracy of It is so important to love and to be loved any of the opinions or information contained (though our contributor Sandra may in this issue of Blitz. Any complaints should A Significant Bother25 disagree with this). I don’t just mean this in be addressed to the Communications the romantic sense; it applies to family and Manager, PO Box 173, Kingsford 2032 friends as well. It’s important to note that a hell of a lot of this is up to you. Basically, to Printing: President’s Report 4 quote Lennon and McCartney, the love you Printed by Agency, Seven Hills. Rates and take is [generally] equal to the love you make. Enquiries should be directed to The Loss of Innocence 5 If you don’t open yourself up to the possibility 8825 8900. of a close relationship, you’re going to miss Snapshot 9 out. The kicker in the whole thing – and it’s Blitz Team 2006: something nobody tells you – is that it can Editor: Rob Gascoigne Gypsy Living 11 be bloody hard to keep a relationship strong. Reporters: Alex Serpo, Flick Strong People evolve and change and it can be Designer: Justin Theng Puzzles 12 a struggle to overcome these personality changes, even with friends you’ve known Med Revue – Thrush Hour 13 forever (trust me on this one). I guess the key Cover Design: Justin Theng to it, as in all things, is compromise. Communications Manager: What’s On 14 I think compromise is an extraordinarily Marina Spurgin, 02 9385 7731 beautiful aspect of human relationships. The Comics 18 idea that someone would make room for Advertising & Sponsorship Coordinator: Charlotte O’Brien you, and you for them, is very appealing to Reviews 20 me. Compromise is not the death of passion; 02 9385 7331 it is the beginning of companionship. Giveaways 20 Still, no matter how hard you try, it can Marketing Manager: Donna Wiemann still all go pear-shaped. If it goes really It’s Post-Modern Moron 24 bad, your doting partner could turn out to be a cheating shit. Flick examines this The End of Rove? 27 phenomenon this week. Public Garbage 28 Of course, you’re not going to wind up in this situation without that initial spark Eastern Suburbs Community College 29 of attraction. Alex has researched the physiology and psychology of attraction. I’ve Classifieds 30 gotta say I particularly like his identification of the “eventually you’ll wear them down” approach. I can think of about five Vox Pops 31 relationships that have been built on that premise.

Blitz Editor Rob Gascoigne

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week9.indd 3 26/4/06 6:16:30 PM You can sample a selection of the winning recipes at the 2006 International Cookbook Launch during Week 13, May 31. Keep this President’s lunchtime free because you won’t want to miss the Cookbook Launch if you have any respect Report for a good feed and a great FREE Cookbook. The following recipes have been selected (congratulations to the authors): Marble Glutinous Rice Ball - Jingying (Jenny) Guo Egg Bacon Pie - Susan Conyers Oma’s potato soup - Sarah Haid Bruschetta - Thiam Kiat Cheong Masala Corn - Mayukh Sengupta Thai Beef Salad - Imran Marzook Argentine Pumpkin Soup - Matias Perez Wholemeal Pizza -Yvonne Lake Easiest, quickest & tastiest curry - Samuel Bassin At the Source, we understand that Gratin capagnard rustic gratin - Guillaume Jean food and eating is a treasured cultural Nimi’s homestyle Chicken Curry - Rahul Shankar P-double-B-stir-fry - Marlina Prasetia barometer for students at UNSW. You can Bi Bim Bap - Thiam Kiat Cheong travel the world through your stomach. Rice with green beans - Hazareh Termeh The Sandwich - Jenna Dennison ow that the final gong has been Unagi mazegohan - Ayako Hirai any of you might not No worice - Mario Japardy realise that the Source gonged, the Source would like Banoffee Pie - Julie Holmes runs a number of courses to thank everybody who entered Chocolate Mousse - Heather Hanks that will help students Na recipe (or two) in the 2006 Sunshines - Jennifer Chow M International Cookbook competition – that’s Ticklishly Tantalizing Trifle - Isabel Clark to find jobs while they are at Uni. right, entries have closed. Koldskål med kammerjunkere - Lena Grindsted and This week, on Thursday and Friday, Natasha Nielson the Source is offering Responsible Over 60 recipes have been received and the Chewy cookies - Robyn Silcock Service of Alcohol (RSA) and majority were of such a high standard that we BBQ skewers - Reg Leones Bar Skills courses. In other times wished there was space in the cookbook for Sorisha Ilish - Arunthia Urmi throughout the semester the Source Channa Dhal Pudding - Hoi Yan Tang every recipe. Unfortunately, there’s not… so, also runs First Aid, Barista, and the judging team have narrowed down the best Coffee Art courses. For more information on the 2006 29 recipes and the graphic designer is now International Cookbook Launch, subscribe to These courses are provided by the in the process of creating a masterpiece of a ‘What’s On’ via the Source website Source for students at a subsidised Cookbook. www.source.unsw.edu.au and we’ll keep rate – as an example, the RSA course you posted. on this Thursday will cost you $65 when you show your student card. All you have to do to book in for a course is come down to the Source reception. You can pay your money there as well. It’s best to get in early to make sure you don’t miss out, but depending on the numbers there may still be places available later on. Contact is a student enquiry and referral desk that is run by All of the courses and what day they student volunteers. Drop into are on are listed in your Source diary, so be sure to check it out. Contact with your inquiry, big or small, we’ll know where you can In addition, the Source (working with find the answer. the Eastern Suburbs Community College) provides students with s the song goes, the best things a discount for professionally run in life are free... In that vein, this creative courses held at UNSW. week we’re letting you know about These courses include things like A the free stuff that Contact has to beginners pottery, photographic offer you! Come and visit us on Level 2, East workshops, learn guitar, beading Wing, Quad Building (the side closest to the and silver wire work, English Basser Steps). Pads and tampons communication, hip hop dancing and We have free pads and tampons. plenty more. Information Yup, Contact is a free information and referral Internet Registrations are open now for service. In short, if you have a question, we the Autumn term creative courses We have a computer available for student can answer it. – check out the “Activities and use with free Internet access. Resources” page on the Source Condoms website for more information. Literature We have free condoms. Limit of 2 per person We have information on campus services, These courses are a great way for per day please. course guides, and a stack of general students to relax and learn new skills, reference books for your use. We even have and are a great example of the way a comfy couch for you to read them on. that the Source provides real benefits to UNSW students now.

Kirstin Hunter Contact: Level 2, East Wing, Quad building. 10am-4pm weekdays during session, President or email [email protected] website (www.contact.unsw.edu.au). [email protected]

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week9.indd 4 26/4/06 6:16:40 PM by Alex Serpo that many fifteen year olds find It’s the death of innocence. been conclusively shown that these strange double standards When we hear that swearing on exposure to violence makes he birth of the Internet laughable too. television was unheard of in the you violent. On a positive was also the death fifties, we find this laughable. note, oppressive government of film and literature The great irony of bodies like However consider that if moral suppression of political material T censorship. In many the Office of Film and Literature standards slide as far in the next is almost impossible in the age ways, it’s an unfortunate death, Classification (OLFC) banning fifty years as they have in the of the Internet, and popular the protection of children films likeKen Park is that in last fifty, in the future we will be movements can rise and connect from gratuitous material is the end it likely increases the seeing live sex on mainstream across the world. important to their proper number of people who actually TV at 4pm in the afternoon, and maturation. However, I always see the film. It merely lifts its nobody will blink an eye. Perhaps Whether good or bad, find it laughable when movies profile without significantly this is not too far away. technological changes are at the cinema contain exposed reducing its distribution. We live removing the ability of censors breasts and fifteen year olds are in the age of South Park and real Some might argue that to stop undesirable material forbidden to enter while most time coverage of genocide via exposure to gratuitous material reaching the populace, twelve year olds can access CNN twenty-four hours a day. I on the whole would develop regardless of their oppressive pictures or movies of graphic sex am of a generation in which our an abhorrence in us rather or protectionist motivations. or any nature of perversion you desensitisation to gratuitous acts than a tolerance. There is Society needs to realise that can imagine online. I am certain of sex and violence is extreme. something to be said for this, these changes are coming, and exposure to pornography is not whatever the effect, take its head always bad, and it has never out of the sand.

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week9.indd 5 26/4/06 6:16:48 PM It’s everyone’s nightmare: your significant other – the person you trust the most - cheats on you. So what advice is there for those who want to avoid this, or worse still, find themselves in this situation? Flick Strong caught up with Samantha Brett, Sydney’s answer to Carrie Bradshaw, to find out.

he scene is straight from Ok, so the scene is ripped believes that infidelity occurs Hollywood. Jamie is on straight from Love Actually but as when someone is not satisfied his way out the door to a girls (and some boys) across the in the relationship. “Often either T friend’s funeral, leaving planet scream at the wench on person is not treating their his sick girlfriend at home in screen, ‘if I was dating Colin Firth partner in a way that makes them bed. He returns after the funeral I would never dream of cheating feel special” says Brett, “so, in to cheer her up, only to find his on him’, infidelity is more than order to get back that “I’m worth brother at his home. Tragedy Hollywood tragedy, it’s a reality. it” feeling, they go and seek it ensues as Jamie is discussing For anyone in any form of elsewhere”. his mother’s upcoming birthday, relationship, trust is an integral only to hear called from the part of a bond that forms and Many of us know someone bedroom, “hurry up big boy. I’m violation of that trust can have who has been cheated on or naked and I want you at least dire consequences. someone who has done the twice before Jamie gets home”. cheating - maybe you’ve even Samantha Brett, Sam in The experienced it yourself - but it is City columnist for www.smh. difficult to get accurate statistics com.au and author of “Luv n Txt” about the level of infidelity,

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week9.indd 6 26/4/06 6:16:55 PM possibly because most people going to cause friction, then it’s aren’t comfortable talking about better to discuss it now before it it, or for that matter, owning up to becomes an issue. it! During telephone interviews as part of the 2003 Australian Study So what else can you do to avoid of Health and Relationships infidelity? Brett’s advice is to about 5% of men admitted to do exciting things to keep the having cheated on their partner relationship alive. “They don’t in the previous year, but it’s safe have to be huge, life-changing to assume that’s only the tip of things, just small gestures” she the iceberg. says, “like leaving cute emails or messages, sending flowers, or Results from different studies the best thing – packing up and estimate that up to 50% of men going on a dirty weekend away!” have been unfaithful at some Brett agrees with the advice of point during their lives, and up increased communication, “in to 30% of women, but again, it’s the long term it’s best to discuss difficult to pinpoint. Research the things that are making you conducted by the Australian unhappy and not feeling loved”. Institute of Family Studies found that infidelity was cited as the According to Brett, monogamy main cause of divorce in 20% of is essential in a successful cases. Brett believes that men relationship. “It’s about making and women are equally likely to your partner feel 100% secure cheat but says “the point is that with you and knowing that you the men are the ones who like to not only aren’t cheating, but brag about it to their mates.” you aren’t putting yourself in a situation where cheating might It doesn’t take a brain surgeon occur”. to figure out that infidelity is also bad for your health. Relationships Some people, however, accept Australia suggest that after a that feelings towards people relationship breakdown, it takes outside their relationship can at least two to three years to happen and instead of fearing it, start putting your life back to embrace it as an essential part normal and as a result many of their relationship. There are people experience serious plenty of couples who embrace health and emotional problems. the open relationship, setting From their research they assert boundaries of what’s acceptable, that it sometimes even takes from going on ‘dates’ with other five years for individuals and people, right through to casual families to get over the emotional sex. Whilst this works for some pain and trauma. The statistics relationships, others may find are discouraging: one in three it difficult to deal with such an first marriages end in divorce, arrangement! along with two in three second marriages, with most people So what do you do if infidelity who get divorced ending their occurs? Brett says “after one marriage after less than ten partner has cheated, it’s so hard years. Ok, but the majority to find trust - even six months on; of us aren’t married! Correct, the person might still be so hurt but statistically, people aged that every time the phone rings between 23 and 30 are in the or their partner goes out, they highest risk group for relationship are worried they are cheating”. problems and breakdown. Relationships Australia says that in the case of infidelity in divorce So before you go dump your there is widespread agreement partner to avoid any ill heath among researchers that and further break your heart, counselling is effective in 60-70% remember that infidelity is of cases. However Brett argues not a foregone conclusion. that “trust is the number one There are certain steps you factor in any relationship and I can take to avoid it becoming think once that has been broken, an issue. Advice from things go haywire”. She possibly Relationships Australia says that has a point. If things have gone communication is the key to a so bad one partner is seeking successful relationship. Most love from elsewhere, perhaps it’s importantly, you should set time to cut loose. After all, we’re boundaries in regards to what only young and there’s plenty of actually constitutes cheating. But fish in the sea, right? Time to put it’s difficult when nearly every on your best pick-up face and person has different comfort head down to the Roundhouse! zones in regards to boundaries. For Brett, “even text messaging or emailing can be constituted (sic) as cheating”. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page in regards to boundaries. If that late night boozing session is

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week9.indd 7 26/4/06 6:17:00 PM ELECTION OF STUDENT MEMBERS TO FACULTY BOARDS SESSION 1, 2006

Nominations closed at 5.00pm on Thursday 6 April 2006. The undermentioned nominations for candidature have been accepted.

FACULTY OF ARTS & SOCIAL SCIENCES - 6 students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 John BERGIN Frances LOCKIE Victoria QUAYLE Zhi Yan CAO Mariam JACOB Atsushi YAMAMOTO Josué CASTRO Michael HISLOP Robert LEIGO Simon GAUKROGER Robert LEIGO Michael HISLOP Robert LEIGO Michael HISLOP Kate SCHOUTEN Ben MANNING Sean HOSKING Norbert EBERT Susan O’REILLY Josué CASTRO Julia MATHAMS Kate SCHOUTEN Robert LEIGO Michael HISLOP Carissa SIMONS Michael HISLOP Robert LEIGO

An online election will be held from 9am, Monday 22 May 2006 to 5.00pm, Friday 26 May 2006.

FACULTY OF THE BUILT ENVIRONMENT - 4 students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2

Kylie RIDGE Johnson APPIAH Shalinee DUTT

Kylie Ridge is declared elected. There are 3 vacancies.

COLLEGE OF FINE ARTS - 2 undergraduate & 2 postgraduate students No nominations were received. There are 4 vacancies.

FACULTY OF COMMERCE & ECONOMICS - 4 undergraduate & 1 postgraduate students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 Undergraduate: Peter ABAKUMOFF Charlie HUNG Tommy LIM William BAHRAMALI Adam DONG Cindy YI WEI Lillian DANG Michael CHEN Stephanie CHAN Paula HADASSIN Jessica NEWMAN Melanie HAYMET Matthew HO Brent LAUGHTON Terri LIN Gracia KUSUMA Yuan WANG Nadia MIRANTI Andrew PRIMROSE Robert MOYLE Erik BACKDAHL Simon SHEIKH Kylie FENTON Jessica NEWMAN Yuan WANG Gracia KUSUMA Nadia MIRANTI Postgraduate: Tatyana SHUMSKY Gian YI-REN Lin QIANG

Tatyana Shumsky is declared elected (postgraduate electorate). An online election for undergraduate students will be held from 9am, Monday 22 May 2006 to 5.00pm, Friday 26 May 2006.

FACULTY OF MEDICINE - 2 undergraduate & 2 postgraduate students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 Undergraduate: Cameron KORB-WELLS Bilal VANLIOGLU Adam HUBER Postgraduate: Brahmaputra MARJADI Van NGUYEN Husna RAZEE

Cameron Korb-Wells is declared elected (undergraduate electorate). Brahmaputra Marjadi is declared elected (postgraduate electorate). There are 2 vacancies.

FACULTY OF SCIENCE - 2 undergraduate & 2 postgraduate students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 Undergraduate: Belinda BENTLEY Sze-en Kathie LAU John STARK Joshua GOLDSTEIN David DAVIS Yonatan DIAMOND Jacky HO Emily BEK Esther CHOW Timothy LI Ying Ho MAN Jaemin KIM Gemma SMART Alex SERPO Samuel THORP Daniel YELF Andrew MCGUIRE Lachlan ROGERS

No postgraduate nominations were received. There are 2 vacancies. An online election for undergraduate students will be held from 9am, Monday 22 May 2006 to 5.00pm, Friday 26 May 2006.

PROFESSOR ROBERT KING, Returning Officer Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic) & Registrar April 2006   Blitz Blitz Magazine Magazine

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ELECTION OF STUDENT MEMBERS TO FACULTY BOARDS SESSION 1, 2006

Nominations closed at 5.00pm on Thursday 6 April 2006. The undermentioned nominations for candidature have been accepted.

FACULTY OF ARTS & SOCIAL SCIENCES - 6 students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 John BERGIN Frances LOCKIE Victoria QUAYLE Zhi Yan CAO Mariam JACOB Atsushi YAMAMOTO Josué CASTRO Michael HISLOP Robert LEIGO Simon GAUKROGER Robert LEIGO Michael HISLOP Robert LEIGO Michael HISLOP Kate SCHOUTEN Ben MANNING Sean HOSKING Norbert EBERT Susan O’REILLY Josué CASTRO Julia MATHAMS Kate SCHOUTEN Robert LEIGO Michael HISLOP Carissa SIMONS Michael HISLOP Robert LEIGO

An online election will be held from 9am, Monday 22 May 2006 to 5.00pm, Friday 26 May 2006.

FACULTY OF THE BUILT ENVIRONMENT - 4 students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2

Kylie RIDGE Johnson APPIAH Shalinee DUTT

Kylie Ridge is declared elected. There are 3 vacancies.

COLLEGE OF FINE ARTS - 2 undergraduate & 2 postgraduate students No nominations were received. There are 4 vacancies.

FACULTY OF COMMERCE & ECONOMICS - 4 undergraduate & 1 postgraduate students Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 Undergraduate: Peter ABAKUMOFF Charlie HUNG Tommy LIM William BAHRAMALI Adam DONG Cindy YI WEI Do you consider yourselves nerds? Did you enjoy making the show? Lillian DANG Michael CHEN Stephanie CHAN Som: Yeah I reckon I’m a nerd, but I don’t Robyn: Yeah definitely, we did everything Paula HADASSIN Jessica NEWMAN Melanie HAYMET see why people have a problem with from learning to dance to singing our theme Matthew HO Brent LAUGHTON Terri LIN that word. I think the term “nerd” implies song to going camping with all the bugs. Gracia KUSUMA Yuan WANG Nadia MIRANTI Every Friday at 7:30pm, someone who is good at what they do. Andrew PRIMROSE Robert MOYLE Erik BACKDAHL SBS TV is screening Seph: For me, it was a bit of an eye opener, I Simon SHEIKH Kylie FENTON Jessica NEWMAN Robyn: Well playing a game for eighteen had no idea what physical activity would do hours in a row, I don’t know if that makes you to my body in the long term. After the first Yuan WANG Gracia KUSUMA Nadia MIRANTI ‘Nerds FC’. The show a nerd or obsessive. couple of weeks, I was sleeping better, but Postgraduate: Tatyana SHUMSKY Gian YI-REN Lin QIANG features fourteen self- it was messing with my hormones because confessed ‘nerds’ who, Seph: Hell Yes, of course I’m a nerd. I think my body just wasn’t used to it. It was fun Tatyana Shumsky is declared elected (postgraduate electorate). An online election for undergraduate students will be held from 9am, Monday 22 it’s awesome to be nerdy. I have spent the because if forced me to do things I would May 2006 to 5.00pm, Friday 26 May 2006. over three months, must last week just getting an average of four or never have done otherwise, like dancing. train to compete against five hours sleep and just coding all day. I’m loving it. You can go through life, and do a FACULTY OF MEDICINE - 2 undergraduate & 2 postgraduate students a professional team. bunch of stuff, get married and have kids, Was it humiliating? Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 Three of the nerds, Som but I’d rather be coding. If you do that stuff Seph: Yeah! Cameron KORB-WELLS Bilal VANLIOGLU Adam HUBER Undergraduate: Guan, Robin Chow and then you’re just like everyone else. Or you Postgraduate: Brahmaputra MARJADI Van NGUYEN Husna RAZEE can do something special like coding. Som: I am used to being humiliated so it was Joseph (Seph) Gentle nothing new for me. Cameron Korb-Wells is declared elected (undergraduate electorate). Brahmaputra Marjadi is declared elected (postgraduate electorate). There are 2 attend UNSW. Alex Do you express yourself as an individual vacancies. Serpo spoke to them through coding? Do you have any behind the scenes stories? Seph: Yeah definitely, yeah, it’s a form of FACULTY OF SCIENCE - 2 undergraduate & 2 postgraduate students about their experiences expression. I have friends and do other Seph: They took us clothes shopping, Candidate Nominator 1 Nominator 2 on the show. stuff but it’s kind of not the same. You can there were these fashion models that came Undergraduate: Belinda BENTLEY Sze-en Kathie LAU John STARK hang out with people for ages and then feel through and told us all our clothes were crap. Joshua GOLDSTEIN David DAVIS Yonatan DIAMOND depressed. There are always the stereotype that models Jacky HO Emily BEK Esther CHOW are dumb and ditsy, but we actually sat Timothy LI Ying Ho MAN Jaemin KIM So only your computer will ever really down and had lunch with them, which was Gemma SMART Alex SERPO Samuel THORP love you? weird and interesting and cool, to see their Daniel YELF Andrew MCGUIRE Lachlan ROGERS view of the world. They think physical beauty Seph: Yeah that’s right. is important, or even somehow useful. No postgraduate nominations were received. There are 2 vacancies. An online election for undergraduate students will be held from 9am, Monday 22 May 2006 to 5.00pm, Friday 26 May 2006.

PROFESSOR ROBERT KING, If you know a person or group that would be of interest to UNSW students and should be profiled here, tell us about them. They should be presently Returning Officer or formerly affiliated with UNSW. Send an email with subject “Snapshot” to [email protected]. Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic) & Registrar April 2006   Blitz Blitz Magazine Magazine Blitz Magazine 

week9.indd 9 26/4/06 6:17:10 PM 2006 ELECTIONS OF STUDENT MEMBERS TO THE UNIVERSITY COUNCIL

Nominations closed at 5.00pm on Thursday 6 April 2006 for the 2006 elections of student members to the University Council. The undermentioned nominations for candidature have been accepted.

ELECTION OF ONE (1) UNDERGRADUATE MEMBER

Candidate Nominators

Douglas BEGG Dean CARSON Trent SCHATZMANN

Kirstin HUNTER Hamish COLLINGS-BEGG Stephen MOK

Andrew PRIMROSE Erik BACKDAHL Robert MOYLE

Tim TRAN Mir MAHMUD Evan TRAN

The election of 1 undergraduate student member to the University Council will be by postal ballot. Voting papers will be despatched by Friday 12 May 2006. The ballot will close at 5.00pm on Monday 19 June 2006.

ELECTION OF ONE (1) POSTGRADUATE MEMBER

Candidate Nominators

Angela BARRETT David MANN Benjamin MANNING

Kylie RIDGE Prosenjit BANERJEE Zhitao LIN

The election of 1 postgraduate student member to the University Council will be by postal ballot. Voting papers will be despatched by Friday 12 May 2006. The ballot will close at 5.00pm on Monday 19 June 2006.

PROFESSOR ROBERT KING Returning Officer Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic) and Registrar April 2006

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week9.indd 10 26/4/06 6:17:11 PM By Associate Reporter If you’re a female (or a prefer the overnight-bag-that- Selina Gordevich metrosexual man) and find you never-leaves. Just stuff it with need your daily survival kit, find everything and take it back to t starts with a few movie yourself an empty space in a your ‘real’ home every couple dates. It progresses to dinner place that your significant other of days to restock. By using the dates, quickly moves to the would never go. For the boys, overnight bag method, your beau Iat- home- video- night- stage, find an empty cupboard in the automatically thinks you’ll only and now most of your weekends garage, just near the power be ‘staying over’ two days at the are spent together. Weekends tools. For the girls, just use any most. turn into weeknights and before spare space that stores cleaning you know it, you’re a permanent equipment. Finally, there’s the issue of what fixture at your Beau’s home. you leave behind when you One warning should attach to actually do leave the house. I So, how does one ‘move in’ to a this advice. Never think ‘well, asked my boyfriend what five significant other’s place without no-one’s here’. Teach yourself female things he hates to find ever ‘officially’ moving in? (i.e. to believe that some one is in his home. The list: tampons, paying rent). Well, I’ve composed always there. Always! One time, teddies, pink bed sheets, a few handy tips so that you too my boyfriend’s flatmate caught cosmetics and flowers. My best can live like a Gypsy (without the me alone in face cream and friend’s list of five male things horse). pyjamas. Don’t be a victim! includes: dirty undies, dirty socks, sports equipment, porn The main secret is to be there If you’re worried about having to and the actual man himself. but also be away enough to wear the same thing everyday, So take heed, and try to avoid make your significant other don’t! A makeshift closet can bringing some of the above think you still live at your own easily be set-up in the boot of items into your beau’s home. (or ‘other’) place. Never, ever your car. To disguise it, just Or leaving it there when you’re call your beau’s house ‘home’; scatter a few textbooks on top. gone… always refer to it as ‘your place’. Your significant other won’t think anything of it; in fact, they’ll Hopefully, you can benefit from probably be proud they’re dating the above tips and enjoy the a smarty pants! Personally, I roving life of Gypsy Living.

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CorporateCorporate SocialSocial ResponsibilityResponsibility ESSAYESSAY CompetitionCompetition

The annual Prime Minister’s Community Business Partnership Corporate Social Responsibility Essay Competition $2,000 is now open. If you are currently first prize! studying in Australia you may be eligible to share in the prize pool of $12,000.

$2,000 First Prize!

For all the details and the essay questions, log on to: www.partnerships.gov.au

Closing date 4th August 2006

hmaC043204 ■ enter now: phone 1800 359 918, or check out www.partnerships.gov.au

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week9.indd 12 26/4/06 6:17:23 PM

have so far raised $2,807.50. What does Med Revue mean to you? Thrillseekers Rob: All of the above. get a rush on Bridge: Friends that you’ll keep for the rest of life. And more – we all got our lovers out of Med Revue. Sydney Harbour

Jeeves: It’s a lifestyle. I live Med Revue, I am Med Revue. Med Revue is my home away from home.

Who does Revue? Do you have to be a Med student?

Anyone who likes to laugh, have fun and spend 227 hours with other people – and that’s only in rehearsals. Med Revue is open to anyone, so everyone gets involved – from med students to computer science students and actuarial studies, music and arts students, a veritable ragbag buffet, doing revue.

Statistically how many extra semesters ydney Harbour Jet Boat rides are the does Med Revue add to your degree? newest and most exciting adventure that Sydneysiders and visitors can With 227 hours of rehearsal it’s like taking experience. This would have to an arts subject, Med Revue 101, where you S be the most fun you can have on Sydney Med Revue 2006 pick up invaluable skills such as learning how Harbour! to make glue from cornflower, improvising, and how to get away with doing the bare Get a group of friends together and minimum of uni work. There’s a high repeat experience Oz Jet Boating’s red shark rate. boat. Feel your adrenalin running from the incredible speed when the driver ignites the Which Revue is better? mighty 700 horsepower Cummins diesel Med, Law or CSE? engines; the jet boat blasts across Sydney Got Thrush? harbour at speeds of up to 80 kilometres per They’re all different, Med Revue is one of the hour. This week from Tuesday to Friday, the only places where CSE students can meet a Science Theatre (next to the Red Centre) white blond girl. Show your guests the sights of Sydney will be filled with lights, sounds and over- from the Harbour - you’ll be able to see actors as Med Revue kicks off. The directors many of Sydney’s famous sites including Is there much rivalry? of this year’s Med Revue, Bridget Poon, the Sydney Opera House, Sydney Harbour Rob Lawther and Rajeev (Jeeves) Verma, There are so many people involved in all the Bridge, Fort Denison, Rose Bay, Goat discharge their thoughts with Flick Strong. different shows and cross-pollination that Island, Taronga Zoo, and much more. And it is injudicious (idiotic) to have too much you get to experience spins, slides, fishtails What is Med Revue? rivalry. and powerbrake stops. Jetboating is an experience you will never forget. All: Med Revue is a sketch comedy show, complete with singing, dancing, videos and Why should we go see “Thrush Hour”? Source Discount Card holders can enjoy a a live band. It is a hearing, seeing and taste The awesome band, original sketch 20% discount on Oz Jet Boating’s Thrill Ride sensation, which prickles all six senses at the comedy, fantastic singers and spectacular tickets. same time. dances. There are so many amazing people Check the Source website for links to all working on Med Revue this year. Our set is participating leisure and recreation providers Didn’t we just have a Revue? phenomenal and the videos will blow you and see Blitz magazine for weekly updates. away. Plus laughing makes you happy. We did. Week 4 featured Law and Orderlies, Your Source Discount Card is also valid which was the best of Med and Law Revues Thrush Hour will be showing from Tuesday across campus at Source food and retail from the past thirty years. It was some to Friday, Week 9. Doors open at 7:30 stores. It’s the only way to claim your Source funny shit, but you can never have too much pm, show starts 7:45 pm. Tickets are $8 Discount. comedy on campus and Med Revue this on opening night, all other nights, student year is fresh, dynamic and extravaganzic. tickets are $10 and non-student tickets are www.source.unsw.edu.au $15. What’s the title of this year’s Med Revue? Keep your Source Discount Card handy. Ticket bookings can be made at www. Thrush Hour. It’s our favourite yeast infection. medrevue.unsw.edu or on 0405803388. Tickets will be sold at the Library Lawn and Why are you all bald? Quad Lawn, from 12-2 pm daily. This year’s Med Revue is proudly supported by UNSW Because of the children. Each year Med Source’s Campus Community funding Revue supports a different charity and program (CCP). this year we are supporting the Sydney Children’s Hospital. We shaved our heads en-masse on the Library Lawn in Week Six, to raise extra funds. The cast did an amazing job running around with tins all that week and, thanks to everyone’s generosity, we

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week9.indd 13 26/4/06 6:17:27 PM

D2MG Beginners Breaking taught Momentum Dance Studio: Trivia by YJ Classical Ballet Class 1pm 3pm - 4pm 6pm Aivirt Our classes will introduce you to A traditional ballet lesson working at Unibar, Roundhouse the foundations of bboying such as the bar and in the centre. Students Free Toprock and Footwork and slowly learn classical ballet movements and prepare for more challenging moves dance sequences while increasing Women’s Collective such as Freezes and Powermoves. strength and flexibility. Good for Breaking is just as suitable for chicks beginners, advanced students can be 1pm – 2pm as well! catered for! The UNSW Women’s Collective Blockhouse For more info www. provides an autonomous space $8/class or $35/5 classes for momentumdancestudios.com.au for women on campus to discuss, members; $10/class for non-member; Casual Class $10, Dance Card (10 debate, support, take action and Sign up with us for just $10 a year! Classes) $80 effect change. Dance Studios Behind Io Myers The Women’s Collective meets every Capoeira S.A.L.S.A. (Gate 2) Tuesday from 1-2pm in the Women’s Room, Level 1, Blockhouse (Lower 4pm - 5pm Monday Night Live Campus). All women on campus are Capoeira is a unique Brazilian art welcome and encouraged to attend. form which incorporates acrobatics, 6.00pm Come and meet other wonderful rhythm, music and self defence in A great environment for learning to women committed to enacting Monday an alternative martial art. It has no be funnier, MNL runs through eighty change! 1 May barriers or pre requisites and the first improvised scenes in eighty minutes: Women’s Room, Blockhouse lesson is for free. and anyone who comes can have Free Dance Studio 1 a go! Individual lesson $10, three lessons Cougar Club Bar, Roundhouse Chess for $23, and the first lesson is free! Ping Pong Impro Late Class 1pm - 4pm Want to learn better positions? 11am Happy hour 8.30pm Website: www.UNSWChessClub. Gnop Gnip! 5pm – 6pm After warming up at MNL, hone your cjb.net Roundhouse Reeb! skills at our in-depth late class. QUAD 1001 Free UniBar, Roundhouse Cougar Club Bar, Roundhouse Free for members. $2 for non- members UNSW Bridge Club Momentum Dance Studio: Hip 12pm - 2pm Hop/Funk Class D2MG Beginners Locking taught Come down, check us out. We’re a 5pm – 7pm Tuesday by Tony (from NU Skool Club!) new club promoting the card game 2 May Taught by industry professionals, 1pm - 2pm of bridge. Beginners absolutely new moves are taught each week Locking is a hip hop dance form welcome. Bring your friends! and put into a fun, high-energy dance that collaborates fast moves with Goldstein 1 routine. Perfect for beginners, a the entire body, then locking in one Ping Pong great workout! For more info www. position. Nu Skool Club is one of Queerplay momentumdancestudios.com.au 11am Sydney’s most elite dance crews with

Week 9 - Monday 1 May - Sunday 7 May - Sunday 1 May 9 - Monday Week Casual Class $10, Dance Card (10 1pm – 3pm Gnop Gnip! members all having up to 15 years Classes) $80 Queers of ALL varieties meet up Roundhouse experience in hip hop dance and Dance Studios Behind Io Myers for some free food and drinks. A Free performance. (Gate 2) purely social activity which involves Blockhouse scintillating conversation and the Thoughtful Foods $8/class or $35/5 classes for occasional game. Poker Food Co-operative members; $10/class for non-member; Queerspace – Applied Sciences Sign up with us for just $10 a year! 5.30pm 11am – 3.30pm Building 920 Come practice your poker face and Thoughtful Foods is UNSW’s food Free Shack Tutoring go in the draw to win a trip to Las co-operative, offering cheap, ethically Vegas! Registration opens at 5.30pm, produced, organic food to staff and 3.30pm – 6pm D2MG Beginners Street Jazz games begin at 6.30pm and runs for students. Pop in and have a look!! Want to gain tutoring and mentoring taught by Wakana approximately 3 hours. Best player Roundhouse experience? Shack Tutoring is a from this venue goes on to play in 1pm - 2pm Free unique volunteering opportunity the Grand Final. Trophies for 1st, Street Jazz is a contemporary dance for UNSW students interested 2nd, 3rd. Entry into weekly cash form combining jazz, hip-hop and Queer Boys in providing free tutoring to lottery ($5000 p/week) and computer funk. Learn this style to move like disadvantaged high school students. software packages to be won 12pm – 2pm Britney’s or Christina’s latest hip-hop UNSW students volunteer only Roundhouse A group specifically targeted at Queer and R&B videos! 1 hour per week. HSC tutors for Free Boys. Come along for some free Blockhouse English, Maths and Sciences required food and drinks and some brilliant $8/class or $35/5 classes for urgently. Don’t miss out on this company. members; $10/class for non-member; rewarding experience. Queerspace – Room 920 Applied Sign up ith us for just $10 a year! Email [email protected] or Sciences sign up at Blockhouse now! Free AIR Room, Roundhouse S.A.L.S.A Social Soccer Free 3.30 - 5pm Unigym Level 1 $2.50 per game

14 Blitz Magazine Week 9 - Monday 1 May - Sunday 7 May D2MG Girls Hip hop (Absolute POLiSOC AGM Classical Music Appreciation

Beginners) taught by Miranda Wednesday Society AGM 3 May 1pm. 4pm - 5pm Please come and get involved in one 2pm - 3 pm Miranda has spent the last half a of UNSW’s largest societies, and help Quad 1001 year in the United States to taste the shape it for the year to come! flavour of where hip hop originated! Ping Pong QUAD 1001 Stress and time management tips Along with lots of street slang, she’s (first years only) 11am even brought back with her the Arts Revue Writers Meeting: experience of learning at the world’s Gonp Ginp! 2pm - 4pm most reputable dancing school, Roundhouse 1pm As the session progresses, this Broadway, NY. Free The inaugural Arts Revue launches workshop will look to assist you in Blockhouse in Week Two, Session Two – and stress and time management in your $8/class or $35/5 classes for Thoughtful Foods we’re looking for writers and social first year at uni. First years only! members; $10/class for non-member; Food Co-operative commentators to help us make Quad 2008 Sign up with us for just $10 a year! comedy history. 11.00am - 3:30pm Morven Brown Rm 310 D2MG Beginners Popping taught Thoughtful Foods is UNSW’s food Free by Kenky Indonesian Night Market 2006 co-operative, offering cheap, ethically produced, organic food to staff and 2pm - 3pm 4pm - 9pm Bar Bingo ‘Satay’, ‘Nasi Goreng’ and ‘Gado- students. Pop in and have a look!! Popping is a unique style of dance gado’… sounds familiar? That’s right! Roundhouse 1pm that strongly focuses on the The Indonesian Night market is back Free Pat and Mick were playing Bingo. Pat movements of individual parts of with a twist! Not only are the mouth kept looking over Mick’s shoulder the body and is highly influenced by watering cuisines, hilarious, cultural Short Meditation Session saying, you’ve got that number mark styles like the ‘robot’ and ‘liquid’. themed performances making a it off, you’ve got that number mark it Marsh Room, Roundhouse comeback, this years’ night market 11.15am -11.45am off. After putting up with this for some $8/class or $35/5 classes for will also be featuring a whole new Every Wednesday, we organise a time Mick got annoyed and said, members; $10/class for non-member; and exciting Panco tournament. Be short meditation session, catering “Why don’t you do your own sheet” Sign up with us for just $10 a year! exposed to everything Indonesian mainly to students who would like Pat replied “I can’t it’s full”. Don’t be to have a break from hectic uni flavoured and join the company of the Pat… D2MG Girl’s Hiphop taught by life! Relaxation is just one of the craziest ‘Indos’ on the block. Unibar, Roundhouse Erico UNSW Main Walkway many benefits of meditation, come Free Free and learn more. For details on our 3pm - 4pm activities visit www.unibuds.unsw. This class is especially created for Education Action Group edu.au. the ladies out there who want to learn Happy hour UNIBUDS Library, Level 3 1pm how to shake it like a polaroid picture! 5pm – 6pm Squarehouse The EAG is a group of student Honestly though, this class will give Reeb! Free! activists interested in campaigning for all the ladies the feminine groove to all Unibar, Roundhouse equitable and accessible education forms of hip hop dancing. So? What Learn the Lingo Coffee Meeting for all students. Come along to catch are you waiting for! up with the latest campaigns and get Blockhouse Pool Comp 12pm - 2pm involved. $8/class or $35/5 classes for 5pm Come chat with students from Student Guild members; $10/class for non-member; Loop around the globe. Free, all welcome Sign up with us for just $10 a year! Unibar, Roundhouse Esmes Café Free Library Lawn Band: Raynco Shack Tutoring Tuesday Night Roast OnSET AGM 1pm 3.30pm – 6pm 5.30pm Catch these up and coming urban Want to gain tutoring and mentoring Good ol’ fashioned meat and 3 veg. 12pm - 2pm roots cats doing their thing live and experience? Shack Tutoring is a Can’t go wrong really. OnSET is Australia’s only student run loud on the Library Lawn unique volunteering opportunity Clems, Roundhouse online magazine. If you’re interested Library Lawn for UNSW students interested $5 in science journalism and want to get Free in providing free tutoring to involved with OnSET come on down disadvantaged high school students. to our BBQ. It’s free and the current Med Revue 2006 D2MG Beginners Hiphop taught UNSW students volunteer only editors will be there to answer any by Kenky 1 hour per week. HSC tutors for 7.45pm – 10.30pm questions you have. English, Maths and Sciences required Thrush Hour. A sketch comedy show Biomed lawn 1pm - 2pm urgently. Don’t miss out on this complete with high-energy dances Kenky is one of the world’s most rewarding experience. and a live band, it is a hearing, seeing Pottery Studio Inductions gifted and talented dancer and he is Email [email protected] or and taste sensation. Proceeds go to here in Australia to spread his passion sign up at Blockhouse now! the Sydney Children’s Hospital. 12.30pm - 1pm and respect for the hip hop culture. Roundhouse AIR Room UNSW Science Theatre Learn how to use the Source Pottery Marsh Room located at Upper Free $8 Opening Night Studio from our Potters in Residence. Roundhouse The studio is free for student use and $8/class or $35/5 classes for is the perfect way to relax between members; $10/class for non-member; classes. Sign up with us for just $10 a year! Pottery Studio, Level 2, Blockhouse Free

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DJ Adam Bozzetto (YU, Eastern) Responsible Service of Alcohol Quad Performance Space: UNSW Ultimate Frisbee Club (RSA) course Alarice, Andy & Dave Training 5pm Why not kick back to this YU, The 10am – 4pm 1pm 4pm - 5:30pm Eastern, and general block rocker The RSA course is a competency Come and support the Quad Ever wondered if there was a team about town, for a mid-week cheeky in based 6-hour program with a Performance Space supporting young sport played with a frisbee? Well the beer garden. Certificate of Attainment issued artists showcase their talents. you should try Ultimate Frisbee. Beergarden, Roundhouse on completion of the course. You Quad Performance Space, Quad The UNSW Ultimate Frisbee Club Free will learn the skills and knowledge Food Court runs weekly trainings conducted by required to serve alcohol in a Free accredited coaches. Beginners are Trivia responsible manner and the always welcome. certificate is essential to any position French Society AGM Village Green 5pm that involves serving alcohol to the Free for members AivirT public. Participants also receive a 2pm UniBar, Roundhouse Handbook for future reference. To The Annual General Meeting of D2MG Beginners Breaking taught Free register please visit www.source. the French Society will be held this by Hideboo unsw.edu.au Thursday, anyone interested please Happy hour Roundhouse attend. 4pm - 5pm Morven Brown 106 Our classes will introduce to you 5pm – 7pm Ping Pong the foundations of bboying such as Reeb Learn the Lingo Coffee Meeting Toprock and Footwork and slowly Unibar, Roundhouse 11am prepare for more challenging moves Gnop Gnip! 2pm - 4pm such as Freezes and Powermoves. Beginners Salsa classes Roundhouse Come chat with students from around Breaking is just as suitable for chicks Free the globe. as it is for guys! Hideboo is a well 5pm - 7pm Coffee Republic respected bboy in both Australia Hutcheson Room, Roundhouse Queer Girls Free and Japan. He is known to stir great A Gold Coin donation for two hours breaking battles. Come and try it for of Salsa!!! 12pm – 2pm D2MG Beg/Int Hiphop taught by yourself! A weekly group specific to Queer Mel Blockhouse Pub Grub Girls. If you’re a Queer girl come $8/class or $35/5 classes for along for some free food, drink and 3pm - 4pm 5.30pm members; $10/class for non-member; excellent conversation! If you have any Melanie’s dance history includes Sign up with us for just $10 a year! Smelc! questions or just want to complain 20 years study/performance in Clems, Roundhouse about something come and talk to us! most dance styles including ballet, Happy hour Queerspace, Applied Sciences 920 contemporary, tap, jazz and Musical Ultimate Frisbee Eastern Suburbs Free Theatre. Melanie has choreographed 5pm – 6pm and performed in numerous events League Reeb! Chess and performances throughout UniBar, Roundhouse 7pm - 9pm Australia and Japan. Don’t miss out Ever wish there was a sport that 12pm - 3pm on this opportunity to learn from the UNSW Economics Society AGM involved a Frisbee? Well, come to the It’s a mating game.. very best! Village Green tonight to play a couple Website: www.UNSWChessClub. Blockhouse 5pm of games of Ultimate Frisbee. This cjb.net $8/class or $35/5 classes for The UNSW Economics Society is exciting new sport is for men and QUAD 1049 (12-2pm) & QUAD1001 members; $10/class for non-member; a new society for all Economics women of all skill levels, combining (2-3pm) Sign up with us for just $10 a year students, as well as anyone with an Week 9 - Monday 1 May - Sunday 7 May - Sunday 1 May 9 - Monday Week some of the best aspects of soccer, Free for members. $2 for non- interest in economics and economic basketball and gridiron. The UNSW members S.A.L.S.A Social Soccer issues. Come along to vote, run for Ultimate Frisbee Club runs a weekly an executive committee position or League for players - beginner or D2MG BBQ 3.30 - 5pm simply sign up to be a member! For advanced. Come along and give it Unigym Level 1 more information, send an email to a go! 12pm - 1pm $2.50 per game [email protected]. Village Green CLB Courtyard Drawing Room, Roundhouse $35 for the session Shack Tutoring Free drinks for members who RSVP Arts Revue Publicity Meeting 3.30pm – 6pm Med Revue 2006 DJ Justin Mile (Funktrust) 1pm Email [email protected] or 7.45pm – 10.30pm Help make publicity history as we sign up at Blockhouse now! 5pm UNSW Science Theatre develop an innovative publicity Roundhouse AIR Room Inject some $10/$15 students/Non-Students strategy for the show. Free bootyliciousghettobouncegoodtimes Morven Brown LG30 into your Thursday night. Free Compass Workshop: Relaxation Beergarden, Roundhouse and Meditation Free D2MG Campus Jam Session 4pm - 5pm Capoeira S.A.L.S.A. Thursday 1pm - 2pm This weekly session will look 4 May D2MG proudly brings to UNSW the at strategies of relaxation and 6pm - 7pm taste of real hip hop styles. Swing meditation. Best results will be Capoeira is a unique Brazilian art by and see (or even join in on) some reached by attending all sessions, but form which incorporates acrobatics, on this pumpin’ hip-hop dance come to as many as you can! rhythm, music and self defence in Thoughtful Foods demonstrations! Location to be advised upon an alternative martial art. It has no Food Co-operative CLB Courtyard registration barriers or pre requisites and the first

Free lesson is for free. 10am - 6.00pm Dance Studio 1 Thoughtful Foods is UNSW’s food UNSW Bridge Club Individual lesson $10, three lessons co-operative, offering cheap, ethically for $23, and the first lesson is free! produced, organic food to staff and 1pm - 2pm students. Pop in and have a look!! Come down, check us out. We’re a Roundhouse new club promoting the card game Free of bridge. Beginners absolutely welcome. Bring your friends! Quad G048

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Buddhism Talk in Chinese Pottery Studio Inductions

6pm - 8pm 12.30pm -1pm Each week we have different talks Learn how to use the Source Pottery about Buddhism in Chinese given Studio from our Potters in Residence. by Buddhist monk or nun. In this The studio is free for student use and coming Thursday, our talk is carried is the perfect way to relax between out by Venerable Neng Rong from classes. Hwa Tsang Monastery. Come and Pottery Studio, Level 2, Blockhouse learn more about Buddhism. Contact Free Boon at 0422 866 515 or visit www. unibuds.unsw.edu.au for details. D2MG Commercial Hip Hop Level 3 Squarehouse taught by Victor Free! 1pm - 2pm UNSW Rotaract AGM This slammin’ new class is instructed by one of our most well-known 6pm dancer on campus. You’ve probably The annual Rotaract AGM! Elections caught a glimpse of this afro-headed of board positions and officer boy busting his moves at many positions will be taking place, the random spots, and one in particular AGM will also include discussion of - the Colonade pool hall! Victor is the years ROTARACT calender. highly respected for his ability to Quad G045 blend in foundations with creativity, style with groove and performance Med Revue 2006 charisma without even breaking a sweat! 7.45pm – 10.30pm Blockhouse Thrush Hour. A sketch comedy show $8/class or $35/5 classes for complete with high-energy dances members; $10/class for non-member; and a live band, it is a hearing, seeing Sign up with us for just $10 a year! and taste sensation. Proceeds go to the Sydney Children’s Hospital. UNSW Science Theatre Friday Arvo Sessions with DJ $10/$15 students/Non-Students Cadell 4.30 pm Yep it’s Cadell again, digging deep for a Friday afternoon soundtrack to get you ready for your Friday night. Beergarden, Roundhouse Friday Free 5 May

Happy hour

5pm – 6pm Reeb! Bar Skills Course UniBar, Roundhouse 9am – 4pm This 7-hour course takes you through Buddhism Talk in English the basics of how to be a bar tender. You will learn the skills required to 7pm - 9pm work in pubs, nightclubs, restaurants, Each week, we organise talk about cafes or at function centres and Buddhism given by a diverse sporting events. To register please selection of speakers, mainly visit www.source.unsw.edu.au venerable monks and nuns and Cougar Club Bar, Roundhouse some lay people. Feel free to join us. Non members are equally welcome. Contact Adeline at 0404 637 818 or Ping Pong visit www.unibuds.unsw.edu.au for 11am details. Gnop Gnip! Room 256 Robert Webster Building Roundhouse Free! Free Med Revue 2006 D2MG Hip Hop Foundations 7.45pm – 10.30pm (Absolute Beginners) taught by UNSW Science Theatre John $10/$15 students/Non-Students 12pm - 1pm Never done any form of dance before? Not a problem. At D2MG we understand that you can not build a mansion on quicksand. This awesome new class will equip you with what you need to get going – groove, basic coordination and attitude. Blockhouse $8/class or $35/5 classes for members; $10/class for non-member; Sign up with us for just $10 a year!

16 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 17 18 Blitz Magazine 2006 ELECTION OF THREE (3) ORDINARY MEMBERS OF THE UNIVERSITY UNION TO THE UNION BOARD OF DIRECTORS

Nominations closed at 5.00pm on Thursday 6 April 2006 for the election of three (3) Ordinary members of the University Union to the Union Board of Directors.

CANDIDATES DATE OF BALLOT: Monday 8 – Friday 12 May 2006 Hamish COLLINGS-BEGG DATE TIME VENUE Jeremiah GALEA Monday 8 11:30am to 2.30pm Pavilions Scott GUMLEY Quadrangle Bldg Tuesday 9 11:30am to 2.30pm Caitlin HURLEY (near Q Store)

Craig KEENAN Tuesday 9 5.00pm to 7.00pm Library Foyer

Eker LU Wednesday 10 11:30am to 2:30pm Library Foyer Shahid MAJEED Central Lecture Block Thursday 11 11.30am – 2.30pm Vincent POON Foyer

Andrew WINATA Robert Webster Building, Jesse YOUNG Thursday 11 5.00pm – 7.00pm University Mall, opposite the School of Mathematics

Robert Webster Building, Friday 12 11.30pm – 2.30pm University Mall, opposite the School of Mathematics

BRING YOUR STUDENT ID CARD On requesting a ballot paper, voters will be required to present to the polling clerk their Student Identification Card and state their full name and course. ABSENT DURING POLLING? If you will not be on campus from 8 - 12 May due to course requirements and would like to vote in these elections, please contact the Elections Office on 9385 1546 as you may be entitled to a postal vote. PROFESSOR ROBERT KING Returning Officer, Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic) & Registrar April 2006

To view candidates’ statements visit: www.elections.unsw.edu.au 18 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 19 The furious berating; decocting I, personally, have never references as far-reaching as enjoyed movies rated PG. The the photography of Sally Mann, complications are generally the London bombings, The along the lines of “I miss my Who’s Pete Townshend and dad, and my big game is his Google searches. You may coming up... oh, here’s my also realise that the viciousness, dad.” Similarly, the climax of nihilism and disgust may well this film involves Lassie running down a driveway, jumping onto Reviews be also directed at you. The sneering remarks informed by the bonnet of a car and then neuro-linguistic programming, running out of a driveway. This all happens in slow motion with Reviews challenge and command you. a huge orchestral track. Who CD: Whitehouse This music grabs you by the cares? wrist and slaps you through Film: Lassie Asceticists 2006 your refusal to explore I couldn’t get into it. But I have to say that seeing Lassie in yourself and your attempted he poster for Lassie real strife - verging on cruelty- K Duo Whitehouse, self-denials with a hand that depicts it as a quirky towards-animal situations - had labelled the most sears and stings. This sinister “fun for the whole my hopes up and kept me in extreme band in the milieu is only intensified by the family!” PG adventure. musical backing of ear-splitting T my seat. world by the BBC’s There’s a geeky looking kid U electronic noise and manipulated Radio 1, released their album with a cheeky smile, and a Look out for a few guest stars, Asceticists 2006 on Valentine’s tribal drum loops. dog poking his head in the including Peter O’Toole and Day this year. This gesture shot with its all-knowing and Diane from Trainspotting (older, was perhaps a little sarcastic, This isn’t limp ‘chill out’ music, judging eyes. Thankfully, the less heroin); there’s a novelty considering the influence the beery rock ’n’ roll or anything movie actually has some darker value in pointing them out to the writings of the Marquis de Sade you can mindlessly nod your undertones and that kept me person sitting next to you. But and other weird sexual material head to. You should be wary of interested. the true star is the well-trained has had on the band. what this album may do to you. Lassie who is referred to as A loving family is in the middle of Luke McElroy both a “good boy” and a “good While Whitehouse’s sound financial strife thanks to the war, girl”. In the end, this film could may be considered ‘noise’, and their final resort is to sell have been better. the music’s extremity is not the dog. Lassie is sent across just provided by the scathing the country. The family become Associate Reporter Tom Hogan instrumentation. The depth of sad and realise they may have the lyrics and their delivery by made a mistake (and they didn’t both founding member William get that much money anyway). Bennett and Philip Best are The dog tries to escape. Wacca what set Whitehouse apart. wacca, hilarious consequences. Hidden Giveaway: Giveaway Mind Body Spirit Festival

Blitz has ten 2 for 1 passes to the new film Hidden, starring Juliette Binoche and Daniel Auteuil, to give away to readers.

Blitz has 20 double passes to give away to the Georges, who hosts a TV literary review, receives packages containing 2006 Mind Body Spirit Festival videos of himself with his family -- shot secretly from the street -- and alarming drawings whose meaning is obscure. He has no idea who may With more and more Australians hankering after healthier and more be sending them. Gradually, the footage on the tapes becomes more fulfilling lifestyles, the Festival promises something for everyone. So, personal, suggesting that the sender has known Georges for some whether you’re looking for information or inspiration, inner peace or time. Georges feels a sense of menace hanging over him and his family mental stimulation, the latest in holistic health and fitness, or just want but, as no direct threat has been made, the police refuse to help. to know what’s out there, the MindBodySpirit Festival invites you to stimulate your mind, revitalise your body, satisfy your soul and pamper To win one of these passes, tell us which French Actress is starring in your senses. “The Da Vinci Code”. Email your answer, along with your full name and surname, student number and contact phone number to To win, tell us what, according to the old saying, when taken each day [email protected] with the subject “Hidden.” “keeps the doctor away”. Send your answer, along with your full name and surname, student number and contact phone number to comps@ 20 Blitzsource.unsw.edu.au Magazine with the subject “Mind Body Spirit”. Good Luck 2006 ELECTION OF STUDENT MEMBERS TO THE ACADEMIC BOARD

Nominations closed at 5.00pm on Thursday 6 April 2006 for the 2006 election of two (2) undergraduate and two (2) postgraduate students to the Academic Board of UNSW. The following nominations for candidature have been accepted.

Two (2) Undergraduate Students Electorate A (one student) comprises enrolled students proceeding towards a degree of bachelor or non-graduate diploma in the Faculties of Arts and Social Sciences, Commerce and Economics, Law, and the College of Fine Arts; enrolled students proceeding to a degree of bachelor or non-graduate diploma in related courses at the University College, ADFA.

Candidate Nominators Candidate Nominators

Andrew PRIMROSE Robert MOYLE Emmanuel SEBASTIAO Michael HISLOP Erik BACKDAHL Robert LEIGO

The election to the Academic Board of one (1) undergraduate student in Electorate A will be by postal ballot. Voting papers will be despatched by Friday 5 May 2006. The ballot will close at 5:00pm on Tuesday 30 May 2006.

Electorate B (one student) comprises enrolled students proceeding towards a degree of bachelor or non-graduate diploma in the Faculties of the Built Environment, Engineering, Medicine and of Science; enrolled students proceeding to a degree of bachelor or non-graduate diploma in related courses at the University College, ADFA.

Candidate Nominators Candidate Nominators

Douglas BEGG Dean CARSON Michael PRATT Anita AYER Trent SCHATZMANN Eleanor PRATT

Belinda BENTLEY Craig KEENAN Gemma SMART Alexander SERPO Sze-en Kathie LAU Andrew WINATA Hidden Cameron KORB-WELLS Aaron VINCENT Nancy TRAN Tom BIRCH Bilal VANLIOGLU Li-Tzu Lisa HOU Giveaway The election to the Academic Board of one (1) undergraduate student in Electorate B will be by postal ballot. Voting papers will be despatched by Friday 5 May 2006. The ballot will close at 5:00pm on Tuesday 30 May 2006.

Two (2) Postgraduate Students Electorate (i) (one student) comprises enrolled students proceeding towards a higher degree, graduate diploma or graduate certificate in the Australian Graduate School of Management, the Faculties of Arts and Social Sciences, Commerce and Economics, Law, and the College of Fine Arts; enrolled students proceeding to a higher degree, graduate diploma or graduate certificate in related courses at the University College, ADFA.

Candidate Nominators Candidate Nominators

Shahid MAJEED Athena FUNG Ben MANNING Sean HOSKING Ning LIU Norbert EBERT Blitz has ten 2 for 1 passes to the new film The election to the Academic Board of one (1) postgraduate student in Electorate (i) will be by postal ballot. Voting papers will be despatched by Friday 5 May 2006. The ballot will close at 5:00pm on Tuesday 30 May 2006. Hidden, starring Juliette Binoche and Daniel Auteuil, to give away to readers. Electorate (ii) (one student) comprises enrolled students proceeding towards a higher degree, graduate diploma or graduate certificate in the Faculties of the Built Environment, Engineering, Medicine and of Science; enrolled students proceeding to a higher degree, graduate diploma or graduate certificate in related courses at the University College, ADFA. Georges, who hosts a TV literary review, receives packages containing videos of himself with his family -- shot secretly from the street -- and Candidate Nominators alarming drawings whose meaning is obscure. He has no idea who may be sending them. Gradually, the footage on the tapes becomes more personal, suggesting that the sender has known Georges for some Kylie RIDGE Rafael BAUTISTA time. Georges feels a sense of menace hanging over him and his family Ryan ANDERSEN but, as no direct threat has been made, the police refuse to help. Kylie Ridge is declared elected. To win one of these passes, tell us which French Actress is starring in “The Da Vinci Code”. Email your answer, along with your full name and Professor Robert King surname, student number and contact phone number to [email protected] with the subject “Hidden.” Returning Officer Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic) & Registrar

April 2006 20 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 21 A great and fulfilling It has been shown that a loving different things in prospective when flirting, thrust their chest relationship is good for you mates. Females have traditionally out and arc their back, both as relationship is a even at the basic level of health. had a different ‘investment’ in a sign of interest and to assert first class cruise People with a close companion their mates because they put so their dominance over other men. to happiness, but are happier and more content much more energy into raising The language of flirting common than those who are alone. This children than men do. Similarly, to both sexes is eye language. As what makes a does not necessarily have to males were classically drawn we have often observed, people good relationship? be a lover, spouse or partner: a to females with wider hips, highly attracted to one other sibling or even a pet can make suggesting easier childbirth. will often gaze into each other’s Attraction is the a difference. Given the huge eyes. If you ever find yourself spark that starts the benefit of healthy relationships, Another biological trait of staring star stuck into someone’s engine, but what what can we do to gain and attractiveness is the ritual of eyes, check if their pupils dilate; maintain them? flirting. Throughout the world, this may mean they are really are the mechanics? regardless of culture, there into you. Beyond the biological What are the rules Obviously, attainment comes is a common body language are social factors, which most of attraction? Alex before maintenance in any of flirting. For women it may people take into account. People relationship. Advice on how to involve smiling at an admirer and who view women or men just as Serpo investigates. acquire the object of your desire gazing at him before dropping objects, rather than people, are is beyond the meagre knowledge her attention away, perhaps more likely to go for looks alone. ennyson said ‘tis better of this humble writer. Therefore accompanied by giggling and to have loved and lost let me fill you in on some of playing with her hair. This string Attraction in a sustainable than never to have the psychology and biology of of gestures is so common that relationship needs to be based loved at all’. Despite all attraction. Swiss ethnologist Irenaus Eibl- on a whole package, not just T Eibesfeld believes that it is pre- one feature. Therefore, those the pain it causes us, attraction Scientifically, physical to another is one of the most programmed into our behaviour with more brains than beauty attractiveness is the trump card. fundamental human desires. before birth. need not despair. According Good-looking people get all the Indeed, Freud argued more than to psychologists Wheeler and sugar (figuratively speaking). Men also have a body language a century ago that it was the only Williams, several other factors However the biology of attraction of attraction, and, as with real desire. But there is so much beyond beauty influence the is a little more complex than females, it’s argued that these more to it than that initial desire. attraction between two people. that. Males and females look for behaviours are innate. Men,

22 Blitz Magazine So here are some tips for Relationships Australia, there are playing out of your league. a number of ways to assess the health of your relationship. Check First: propinquity. We like those the list to the side to see how who we spend a lot of time with. your relationship stands. This is the ‘he/she just wore me down’ factor of meeting Anyone who has seen the ugly someone. Second: similarity. side of love can tell you love We like those who are similar hurts. However I think Leonard to us because we perceive that Cohen put it accurately when he we will have similar needs and sang; ‘love is not some kind of wants. Third: responsiveness. victory march.... it’s a cold and We like those who respond to it’s a broken Hallelujah’. I think us. It shows they care, but also what he meant was that we don’t that we can control them. Those find love in bliss, but rather in our that find love a one-way street darkest hour of despair. Good should take heed, because luck. reciprocality is a powerful factor in relationships. We like those who like us because it’s rewarding in an endless loop. If all else fails, the best advice is to try and try again. Do you: Once you meet the one who lights that spark, or gives you enjoy being with butterflies, any counsellor each other? or psychologist will tell you that the basis of a good have fun together relationship is communication. This goes for any relationship feel comfortable to but it is particularly true of a be yourself? relationship with a lover. It is through communication that all couples overcome the problems find each that they will inevitably face. other attractive? People often have the illusion that when they meet ‘the one’, share decision making everything will be perfect and and chores? the relationship will require no hard work. According provide extra support to Relationships Australia, when required? a non-profit community based support organisation, allow each the elements of a good other freedom? relationship are: communication, commitment, equality and really listen to respect, intimacy, sexual each other? expression and importantly, love. The precise quantities give each other of ingredients varies with the positive feedback? recipe; there are many kinds of love. With communication and the commitment to meet each agree how to spend other’s needs, any relationship your free time? can reach Nirvana. behave demonstratively WE’LL GIVE YOU UP TO For the vast majority of people and affectionately? $30,100p.a. TO STUDY, in relationships, it is difficult to judge how a relationship enjoy a good sex life? FOLLOWED BY EXPERIENCE is travelling. According to MONEY CAN’T BUY. feel enthusiastic about the relationship?

fancy each other? For more information or to apply, visit www.defencejobs.gov.au/studentpub/officer or call 13 19 01. ADF SPONSORED HAVE YOU GOT WHAT IT TAKES? UNDERGRADUATE CALL 13 19 01 OR VISIT WWW.DEFENCEJOBS.GOV.AU hmaC041426

22 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 23 By Flick Strong What scares me is how much along with notions of post- reading, pipes up with, ‘well if of an Arts wanker I have structuralism, or anything ‘post’ we view this from a post-modern am an Arts student. In actually become. This revelation for that matter, scares the shit perspective I believe what the fact, I am the stereotypical occurred the other day in out of even the most studious author was saying was…’ Argh! Arts student. I have been class, and it is a shock I may of students. That is, except for I here for much longer than need many years of therapy to philosophy students, a breed of I’m not actually convinced that the requisite three years to overcome. Ok let me just pause scary individuals who not only half the students using the term be awarded the bachelor of for a second to gather myself. understand Nietzsche on a first are using it correctly, let alone attendance, sorry, Arts. A Ok. Yesterday in class I gave a read, but also relish in giving the teaching staff. I tell you what long time. But like many of my ten minute mini-lecture on the you a half hour dissertation on though, if you can somehow counterparts, I have in fact concept of Post-Modernism Nietzsche’s theory on aesthetes draw the tutorial class into a relished all the campus has to and its practical application in versus the Hegelian way of discussion of the concepts of offer. Maybe too much so – ask our understanding of historical thinking. objective truth and absolutes my parents about that one. I am discourse and our Modernist in any class I guarantee it’s a ok with this however. I do not preoccupation with an objective I’m going to say it. I know it’s sure-fire time waster in which regret that whilst the rest of my truth. There, I said it. controversial, but I think it is you can cleverly hide the fact you friends are graduating with real quite accurate to claim that Post- haven’t even bought the reader degrees I am still here. Sincerely. I am an Arts wanker. I managed Modernism is the most over- for the session. See, I have to speak unprompted, for used word in the Arts faculty. learnt something in all my years longer than it should be legal, I struggle to think of a class in ‘studying’. about Post-modernism, a which some clever little bastard deconstructive discourse that, who obviously hasn’t done the

24 Blitz Magazine very act of being single at a “No, I’m only 21” certain age culminates in the stereotypical assumption that (Slight pause) “That’s old one is destined to be single for enough” the rest of her life – a ‘tragic spinster’ or an ‘old maid’ to use “I suppose it is for some” a grossly anachronistic term. “Yes, well, you don’t want to And although – as Alicia rightly leave it too late. You see, a points out – “Post-Sex and the person is like an apple tree. City, the whole tragic spinster People don’t want the apples stereotype has gone out the that have fallen on the ground, door, replaced with the play-the- they want the fresh ones that field-with-no-strings-attached are still on the tree”. scenario”, it is inevitable that some of the more traditional A few days later, I related this stereotypical assumptions of story to a few friends who were singletons still exist. And even if thoroughly amused. 21, to most people, would seem “But hang on…” interrupted a to be an ideal age to remain The world seems obsessed with male friend of mine. “Does this single (as it seems to me) it mean you have no desire for a couplehood. So where does a happily would appear that this is not so relationship whatsoever?” single girl fit into this equation? for many people. No. It just means I’m still waiting Sandra Audi considers. A few weeks ago I was having for the right guy to come along. a conversation with a customer As much as I don’t like being – an elderly Macedonian told that, metaphorically, I am he newspapers are catatonic state), “If we see that gentlemen - at the restaurant destined to become rotting filled with psychic love totally gorgeous guy at the bar where I waitress. As I poured fruit, I am resolute that my lines and personal ads. or the beach, we do not have a him a glass of wine, I asked him relationship status will be Emails are crammed total guilt trip if we wander over how his weekend had been. T determined by me, and not by with crush calculators and to simply say hello”. He started telling me about his the pressures of a society that zodiac compatibility tests. eldest daughter’s wedding, and Ahhh, the freedom of being seems obsessed with seeing me Movies and magazines deal how much he adored his new single. leave the world of singledom, on with the same universal themes son-in-law. – meeting one’s significant the arm of just any “significant While I know plenty of single other, having problems with “Are you married?” he asked other”. girls who can relate to the above one’s significant other, breaking suddenly. up with one’s significant other, scenario, believing whole- making up with one’s significant heartedly that prematurely other. It seems the world is hell- entering into a relationship bent on setting me up with one has the potential to stunt their of these “significant others”! growth as an individual, it is also bloody obvious that the world of “Do you have a boyfriend?” singledom has its disadvantages people ask. When confronted as well. Downsides include with a resounding “no”, the next those times when it’s beneficial question is invariably “why?” to have a man on your arm Standard answers include “I – on Valentine’s Day, at the haven’t met the right guy”, “I’m annual office function, at parties not ready for a relationship yet” and weddings. Alicia, a fellow Want a job and (my favourite) “my standards (embittered) singleton, claims are too high”. Most singletons that “the whole [process of] would thus respond by saying catch[ing] the bouquet is just that their relationship status is giving all those happily smug in the arts? simply a matter of choice. Which couples something to be smug indeed, for most people, it is. about. They aren’t the ones looking like bloody idiots fighting Here’s a start! You take a deep breath and tell over a bunch of flowers…” UNSW Source is seeking applications for two (2) positions organising them: “being single gives one arts programs within the Student Development Department. opportunities that would not It is perhaps precisely these come about if one were in a sad situations that result Both positions are 12 hours per week on a casual basis relationship with a “significant in many singletons finding (Rate: $17.38/hour). other”. We discover what we themselves the subjects of like and what we don’t like, misguided matchmaking. The ARTSWEEK COORDINATOR UNSWEETENED we realise our potentials and list of people who take it upon (12 Hours per week) LITERARY COORDINATOR limitations, we determine our themselves to become your Employment period: (12 Hours per week) expectations and we map boyfriend-finder, husband- 22 May – 9 June, 2006 and Employment period: out our goals for the future hunter or soul-mate searcher 10 July – 15 September, 2006 22 May – 15 September, 2006 without the distractions and may extend from your relatives Responsibilities include: Responsibilities include: added constraints of being in a and friends to clients and • Recruiting, training and • Recruiting and coordinating relationship…” customers at your workplace. coordinating 25 volunteers. a team of 5 volunteers. It is as if lacking a “significant • Planning events for Artsweek 2006 • Coordinating production of the Their eyes start to glaze over other” in one’s life makes one (Week 7, Session 2) unsweetened Literary Journal. but you plough on, regardless: somewhat incomplete and • Coordinating promotions • Promoting the unsweetened “Being single allows one to these supposedly well-meaning for Artsweek. 2006 Literary prize learn about one’s self. It is a people are doing you a favour. rejuvenating experience. It For application details, desirable attributes and a detailed job description, please enables one to develop as a To some of the world, being see the employment section of the Source website: www.source.unsw.edu.au. human being. “Plus”, you add single is an abnormal condition, Applications for both positions close 5pm, Thursday 4 May, 2006. (before they fall into a total especially for women. The

24 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 25 2006 ELECTION OF LIFE MEMBERS AND ORDINARY MEMBERS TO THE UNIVERSITY OF NEW SOUTH WALES UNION BOARD OF DIRECTORS

Nominations closed at 5.00pm on Thursday 6 April 2006 for the 2006 elections of one (1) Life Member and three (3) Ordinary Members to the University of New South Wales Union Board of Directors. The undermentioned nominations for candidature have been accepted.

Life Members

Candidate Nominators

Giles HARDIE Andrew JOHNSTON Gregory MOORE

Giles Hardie is declared elected.

Ordinary Members

Candidate Nominators Candidate Nominators

Hamish COLLINGS-BEGG Ran TAO Eker LU John LIN Kellie MATHEWS Robert LEIGO

Jeremiah GALEA Robert LEIGO Shahid MAJEED Ning LIU Tatyana SHUMSKY Athena FUNG

Scott GUMLEY Eva DURLAK Vincent POON Justin TEOH Craig KEENAN Jane LAM

Caitlin HURLEY Leigh DUNLOP Andrew WINATA Gracia KUSUMA Laura WHITEHOUSE Fei WANG

Craig KEENAN Eva DURLAK Jesse YOUNG Anita AYER Scott GUMLEY Fei WANG

A personal campus ballot for the election of three (3) Ordinary Members to the University Union Board of Directors will be conducted from Monday 8 May to Friday 12 May 2006.

POLLING PLACES AND TIMES

Date Time Venue Monday 8 May 11:30am - 2:30pm Pavilions Tuesday 9 May 11:30am - 2:30pm Quadrangle Building (near Q Shop) 5 - 7pm Library Foyer Wednesday 10 May 11:30am - 2:30pm Library Foyer Thursday 11 May 11:30am - 2:30pm Central Lecture Block foyer 5 - 7pm Robert Webster Building, University Mall, opposite School of Mathematics Friday 12 May 11.30am – 2.30pm Robert Webster Building, University Mall, opposite School of Mathematics

THE BALLOT WILL CLOSE AT 2.30PM ON FRIDAY, 12 MAY 2006.

PROFESSOR ROBERT KING Returning Officer, Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic) & Registrar April 2006

26 26 Blitz Blitz Magazine Magazine By John Lodo The show’s format is largely Not all is lost however, Ron the intact: a hodgepodge of celebrity octogenarian movie reviewer t wasn’t too long ago that I interviews, music performances is surprisingly witty and welcomed every episode of and comedy segments, yet the progressively-minded (he gave Rove Live with a sense of show had lately been degraded Brokeback Mountain 3.5 out Ianticipation and excitement. into a personality cult overdrive. of 5 stars) and the faux news The jokes were actually funny, Rove McManus’s humour, to say update is a heck of a riot. And the host was kinda cute and the the least, has become contrived; the “What The ?” segment still gags were original. Not anymore. the interviews are patronizing packs a punch with viewer Three Gold Logies and hundreds and unrevealing and those submissions of funny typos and of shows later, this program stunts..ugh..when does allowing mistranslations. But these good – the only surviving variety show audiences to call in live/pranking bits are too weak to hold up a on network television – seems viewers/painting an entire house one hour show by themselves. to have run its course. Ratings in orange/hosting a show in for the show are a fraction of its someone’s house constitute Rove needs to act quickly heyday, sitting perilously at no.95 watchable television? to resuscitate his show if he on the top 100. wants to achieve the prestige The clear dearth of creativity and longevity of Bert Newton, From a struggling stand up and entertainment value was Graham Kennedy and the like. comedian from Perth to Rove more aggravated when Corrine Live today, Rove’s meteoric Grant left the show this year rise to fame is no less a miracle to concentrate on The Glass considering the dire state of House and her standup career. the local television industry. Without her airheadedness But, dare I say, it is time for and conviviality, the bantering that mousy cutie-pie to get a between Rove and Peter Helliar dressing-down. is about as funny as a church sermon.

26 26 Blitz Blitz Magazine Magazine Blitz Magazine 27 By Meiling Tan To me, this seems a rather are there for you to dispose of enduring the nauseating stench disturbing and, I hate to say it, your garbage. It is not that hard of the half-eaten (and probably icture this: you walk into rather lazy act I see too regularly to throw it away. It’s a hideous half-rotten) breakfast bars left any busy public café in places like Gloria Jeans, KFC sight to endure when you seat beside my seat. or restaurant and look and McDonald’s. There are yourself next to a table already P around for a spot. You probably reasons why people covered with someone else’s I may be coming across as had seen people already walk leave this garbage behind. garbage. You either have to push vain by now, or perhaps a self- out, or perhaps you are lucky Maybe people think that the retail it aside or throw it away yourself. appointed Greenie hero, but I still enough to find a table to seat staff will clean up after them, but feel fervent about it. Next time yourself. However, something don’t they have an obligation Not only has this occurred time you stop into Gloria Jeans, eat just throws off the atmosphere to remove garbage they made and time again, public garbage out at McDonald’s, or perhaps of the place and stares you right themselves. has also extended to the inside after finishing reading this little in your face. On at least two of trains (not that the delays rant down at the Quad Food tables, preferably those free from These places not only serve you, every morning aren’t already Court, make a good example you, there is a large amount of but also allow you to dispose of a sufficient pain). Despite the for everyone and throw your finished disposable utensils, your trash. That is why there are rules on the train, I guess it has garbage away. It would save cups, napkins lying there: the bins strategically placed at exits, become trendy to leave garbage everyone some time and the inevitable public garbage. or at least near a majority of the everywhere we go. Just one trouble of having to deal with tables that are available. They train ride to university had me extra garbage piling everywhere.

SPECIAl OffEr FREE Jet 4” x 6” Photo Paper (20 ShEEt PACk) with every Jet cartridge purchased. Available while stocks last Compatible Inkjet Cartridges Now available from Quad Store and Photo Paper for EPSON & CANON multifunction and inkjet printers

Quad Store is open from 8.30am to 6pm Mon-Thu and 8.30am-5.30pm Fri

28 Blitz Magazine Sometimes, there’s a gap between what you Einstein Explained would like to learn and what you need to learn. Luckily, there are options open for those who Venue: Blockhouse want to learn something new or different. Here 2628UTU Tuesdays 7.00 to 9.00pm for 2 weeks, starts 16 May are some of the courses on offer at the Eastern Fee $25 (Source members) / $45 (non-members) Suburbs Community College. Register with your Source Discount Card for a special discount. Web Site eCommerce Venue: Blockhouse 2374UTU Tuesday 6.00 to 9.00pm for one evening: 6 June Singing Fee $38 (Source members) / $58 (non-members) Venue: Squarehouse 2191UMO Mondays 6.30 to 8.30pm for 8 weeks, starts 8 May Fee $118 (Source members) / $138 (non-members) Web Site Promotion Venue: Blockhouse 2375UTU Tuesday 7.00 to 9.00pm for 3 weeks, starts 13 June Rocket Science Fee $62 (Source members) / $82 (non-members) Venue: Blockhouse 2629UMO Mondays 7.00 to 9.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 8 May Pottery Fee $118 (Source members) / $138 (non-members) Venue: Blockhouse 2102UTU Tuesdays 6.30 to 9.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May English Pronunciation 2105UTU Fridays 10.00am – 12.30pm for 8 weeks, starts 12 May Fee $152 (Source members) / $172 (non-members) Venue: Blockhourse 2715UMO Mondays 6.30 to 8.30pm for 8 weeks, starts 8 May Fee $100 (Source members) / $120 (non-members) For more information please visit www.escc.nsw.edu. To claim your UNSW Source membership discount you must English Conversation enrol by telephone on 9387 7400. Venue: Blockhourse 2711UTU Tuesdays 6.30 to 8.30pm for 2 weeks, starts 9 May Fee $100 (Source members) / $120 (non-members)

Guitar (Beginners) Venue: Blockhouse 2186UTU Tuesdays 7.00 to 9.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May Fee $118 (Source members) / $138 (non-members)

Pilates Floor Exercises Venue: Roundhouse 2490UTU Tuesdays 6.00 to 7.30pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May 2491UTU Tuesdays 7.30 to 9.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May Fee $90 (Source members) / $110 (non-members) GET STUFFED Yoga !4 4(% 2/5.$(/53% Venue: Roundhouse 2543UTU Tuesdays 6.00 to 7.30pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May 2544UTU Tuesdays 7.30 to 9.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May Fee $90 (Source members) / $110 (non-members) ROAST Singing in Harmony TUESDAYS Venue: Squarehourse 2193UTU Tuesdays 7.00 to 9.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 9 May FROMPM Fee $118 (Source members) / $138 (non-members)

Web Site Marketing Venue: Blockhouse PUBGRUB 2373UTU Tuesday 7.00 to 9.00pm for 4 weeks, starts 9 May Fee $78 (Source members) / $98 (non-members) WEDNESDAYS Beading and Silver Wire Work FROMPM Venue: Blockhouse 2171UFR Fridays 12.00 to 2.00pm for 8 weeks, starts 12 May Fee $128 (Source members) / $148 (non-members)

28 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 29 Arts Revue Job Seminars Oaktree Guest Speaker Night Studio Four and the Faculty of Arts & Social Applying for Jobs Internationally – presented Hear from two people of their experiences Sciences are proud to announce UNSW’s by Careers & Employment on Thursday 6 July of working with Oaktree, a youth-run aid first-ever Arts Revue. We need students to from 3 – 5 pm in Quad Room 2008. Preparing organisation. Discuss global poverty issues get involved in multimedia, music, design, for the Australian Workplace– presented by and find out how to get involved in Oaktree writing, social events, wellbeing, marketing, Careers & Employment. Thursday 6 July from initiatives. Party afterwards. All welcome. sales, sponsorship, promotions, tech crew 1 – 3 pm Quad Room 2008. For workshops Fingerfood will be provided and soft drinks and acting. To register your interest or to find presented by Careers & Employment, you available for purchase. Cougar Club Bar, out more, call 0400 595 901, or visit www. need to register online via: www.careers. Roundhouse, Tuesday May 9, 6pm – 9pm. studiofour.org.au/artsrevue. unsw.edu.au/workshops World Debt Day Event Call for Writers Seeking Chihuahua Jubilee Australia will be holding an event Echo, the commerce and economics 5 year old handsome Chihuahua seeking to renew calls for world debt cancellation. magazine on campus, is looking for writers. long-term live-in girlfriend for affection and Attendees will include politicians, media, It’s a great way to get involved, hone your companionship. Would prefer a female aid agencies and academics and is open writing skills, and have enormous amounts of Chihuahua puppy, short-hair, with black and to anyone interested in the issues. Monday, fun! Contact [email protected] white markings. My owner is willing to pay a Week 11 at 12pm at NSW Parliament House reasonable price. Please contact Cassandra Macquarie St, Sydney on 0415 255 188 Artistic? A Night to Make Poverty History Love painting, drawing, sketching, or 2006 ISS Snow/Ski Trip somehow making marks on paper? We Join us to get our generation involved in want YOU for an interactive public outdoor Join International Student Services on its ending extreme global poverty by 2015 night-time real-time painting/drawing event three day Ski/Snow trip to Perisher Resort in accordance with the 8 UN millenium in Semester 2. Sound intriguing? It is! More from 17-19 July 2006. Cost is $295 and development goals. RSVP unswoaktree@ details if you contact [email protected] includes two-night accommodation in private gmail.com for more details. Tuesday, Week lodge, tour of Canberra, all transport to and 10, 5:30-9:00pm in the Cougar Club Bar, from Sydney, tour guide and meals. For Roundhouse (Second Floor). International Students’ Seminars information, contact ISS at international. [email protected]. Trip open to ISS presents Returning Home Seminars Double 100 campaign (Apr-May) for international students. The Preparing international and local UNSW students. to Return Home Seminar will be held on Throughout April and May, the Oaktree Wednesday 5 July from 2 – 4 pm in the Red Foundation will be meeting with over 100 mps Centre Room M032. A Seminar on Preparing across Sydney to call for more generous aid, to Stay in Australia will be held on Friday 7 trade and debt relief. Everyone is welcome July from 3 – 5 pm in the Physics Theatre to attend. To register, email m.penman@ (K14) To register, email international.student@ theoaktree.org for more information and a unsw.edu.au briefing pack.

Job Opportunity Bulletin 2007 O-Week Coordinator UNSW SOURCE is seeking to appoint an EssEntial CritEria • Recent experience within the UNSW O-Week program. enthusiastic and motivated student for the • Understanding of roles and responsibilities of positions in the program. position of Coordinator for O-Week 2007. • Excellent oral and written communication skills. The job requires 20 hours per week during • Ability to liaise at all levels of management. • Demonstrated leadership experience and skills. session and 35 hours per week out of session. • Ability to make decisions under pressure. The successful applicant will report to the • Proven ability to work as a member of a team. • Awareness and understanding of equity issues. Manager of Membership Services and will • Excellent organisation and administrative ability. have responsibility for the organising and • High level of attention to detail • Availability throughout the 2006-2007 summer break administration aspects of the O-Week 2007 • Experience in the area of volunteering program including management of a team Possession of a current driver’s licence would be an advantage but is not essential. Written applications addressing the relevant criteria, with contact phone of up to 130 volunteers. numbers and a complete resume are to be directed to UNSW SOURCE Human Resources, PO Box 173, Kingsford 2032. Fax 9662 6340 or email to Further information, including the job description, are available from the Student [email protected] quoting REF: O-WEEK 2007 in the subject line. Development Office at the Blockhouse, or at www.source.unsw.edu.au Applications close Friday, 5 May 2006, 5:00pm

30 Blitz Magazine What’s your best What’s your best pick-up line? break-up line?

Roger Luke Ray and Caroline 1. I’m here, now what are your other 1. You’re so hot you’re the reason for 1. Ray - If you don’t want to beat two wishes? global warming! around the bush do you mind if I 2. You’re fat and you’re ugly! 2. Sorry, I’m gay do? 2. Caroline – I want to have a baby!

Nathan Reese Anthony 1. If I could rearrange the alphabet 1. If you were a tear in my eye I’d 1. You are what you eat and I’d put u and i together’ never cry for fear of losing you I’m planning on becoming you 2. A text message saying it’s over 2. Just want to be friends tomorrow (from Wog Boy) 2. It’s not working out, girl

30 Blitz Magazine Blitz Magazine 31 Dell DJ’s Illya , Ca aDam Bozzetto JustIn mI le

saInt?

thursDay may 11 from 5pm sourCe memBers free sTudenTs $5 / guesTs $10 happy hour 5pm to 7pm

Ces sInner? lIve performan BIgphallICa frangIpanI

www.source.unsw.edu.au 32 Blitz Magazine The Roundhouse encourages the responsible service of alcohol.