Gridiron Gazette 1 Vorhexen 2520 Issue #1 : Humans
Everyone knows the Reikland Reavers . . . but what about the other Human teams who take to the astrogranite??
Edition one of the Gridiron Gazette casts its eye over the ‘lesser’ Human teams to have played the great game.
INSIDE __ Middenheim Marauders You can smell the Chaos from here! __
Albion Wanderers Kicking the ball . . . ? Strange but true. __
Bad Bay Hackers From underdogs to over lords! __
Creeveland Crescents Talent wasted? __
The Other Reavers Prepare to go oooh-la-la at Port D’Acquitaine! __
Who’s Who The full player directory
Gridiron Gazette - Humans Trophy Cabinet The Middenheim Marauders Blood Bowl winners (2469) - By Dolf Ungerhaagen
Blood Bowl Runners Up The Middenheim Marauders franchise still exists, but they have changed quite a (2477, 2483) lot over the years. We’re covering here their early history where they played as a Human team before a merger and the inclusion of Dwarfs and Halflings on the Whiteskull Challenge Cup roster. Winners (2432) Stadium Chaos Cup Winners (2490) In earlier and simpler times, the Marauders played in the Karl Franz arena, formerly Famous Players known as the Middenheim Arena. It was a large stadium seating up to 83,000 people for each game. The stadium was known for its temperate weather during games and The Marauders have officials who were surprisingly good! always enjoyed the taint of Chaos, despite the fact History they are a Human team. They have never been 2465 – After a successful season, the Marauders were all killed in a mysterious flying afraid to take on players carpet accident. The following season, the Blood Bowl winning Champions of Death who are different to the team looked strangely like the lost Marauders. Tomolandry assured everyone that this ‘norm’ shall we say. was purely a coincidence!
Famous faces to have 2472 – Bob Bifford comes out of retirement and is signed for one game by the worn the Marauder jersey Marauders to play against the Chaos All-Stars. The game is famous for the clash includes – between Bob and Morg N’Thorg. Bob came out on top, flattening Morg and scoring the ➢ Bob Bifford (Ogre) winning touchdown while whistling the Middenheim city anthem. ➢ Karla von Kill (Human) 2477 – The Marauders lose the Blood Bowl final to the Skavenblight Scramblers 3-1 in a ➢ Withergrasp torturous match that lasts a massive 9 hours! Exhausting! Doubledrool (Beastman) 2486 – Karla von Kill is signed for the Middenheim Marauders and quickly goes on to ➢ Massif “Hungry” make her name Bofine (Minotaur) ➢ Uthar Hagg (Half 2489 – After the collapse of the NAF, the team get into financial trouble. They change Orc). their name to The Marauders, sell their stadium and become a touring team. The financial troubles continue to follow them however and so in order to stay in business, Staff they merge with the Middenland Maulers. The new team, the Middenheim Maulers, are The Marauders were very multi-racial but the Marauders had rarely just fielded humans historically. coached by Goran Slaver, a man of particularly Cross Code violent tendencies. One season he killed his own The Marauders famously played in a Blood Bowl exhibition match against the Blood Axes assistant with a chainsaw! who are normally a Dungeon Bowl team. The Blood Axes failed to understand the fact that one teams starts with the ball rather than needing to find it. This led to a crushing When the Marauders 15-0 defeat as they frantically tried to find non-existent chests! became the Maulers, ex- club captain Uther Hagg Tanks very much became the Head Coach. The Marauders played in the only game so far to feature a Goblin tank fielded, by the Evil The club’s mascot was a goat named Janet. Alas Gits. Luckily Massif Bofine was on hand to rip open the tank with his horns and scoff the whereabouts of poor Stranglegut the unfortunate goblin tank driver. He was soon spat out however, as Massif Janet remain a mystery! explained later, he didn’t like “canned meat”!
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
In name only!
The Blood Bowl world is vast and so there are loads of teams out there that we know exist . . . but we don’t know anything about them at all!
Here is a quick shout out to the Human teams we know in name only…
➢ Albion All-Stars ➢ Altdorf Griffons ➢ Armageddon Avengers ➢ Bordeleaux Ravens ➢ Carroburg Crusaders ➢ Golden Griffons ➢ Leitdorf United
➢ Lions of Couronne ➢ Middenham United ➢ Nuln River Boaters Albion Wanderers ➢ Paravon Penetrators ➢ Reikland Riot Girls - By Gerhardt Schtumpf ➢ Rostov Renegades ➢ Talabheim Morningstars The Wanderers are a secretive bunch! Hailing from the far-off misty isle ➢ Team Errant of Albion and coached by Bob Berobsson , they proved to be a better cup than league team. Altdorf All-Stars
The Wanderers took a long while to adapt to Blood Bowl outside of Albion The All-Stars were only formed for one where the rules were slightly different. Their first games were a disaster, brief and glorious season. They were including an incident where the Gouged Eye spit roast and ate 3 of their made up of players from the Reikland players in front of them on the sidelines! Reavers, Middenheim Maulers and the Altdorf Avengers. They played in the AFC Northern Division but rarely made an impact. That contrasts heavily to their record in the other majors where they enjoyed Led by Griff Oberwald they made the Blood Bowl final in 2503 only to see significant success. They won the Whiteskull Challenge Cup in 2433 and their dreams crushed at the hands of then after it changed its name to the Chaos Cup, took it home a further 5 Count Luthor von Drakenborg. times (2444, 2454, 2457, 2474, 2488). Fighting Talk! Alas they never survived the collapse of the NAF. Financially destitute, they returned to Albion to take a up strange game where you kicked the ball Both the Nuln Oilers and Nuln instead! Ironflanks are famous for just one thing – losing bar room brawls!
Creeveland Crescents
This former AFC Eastern team has a long history of underachieving. Yes, they won the Blood Bowl in 2476, but the player strike was just starting and their opponents were the Greenfield Grasshuggers!! The Green and Whites have always boasted rosters full of talent but rarely turn it into results. They were the first outfit Bob Bifford played for in his rookie year, gave a home to Rotten Rick Bupkeis while he was alive and enjoyed the Ninja skills of Hoshi Komi as well as the dancing thrills from the deadly Harry “The Hammer” Kehry. Just a shame they couldn’t build on such talents! Now they’re a shadow of themselves, reduced to being a touring team since 2488
Gridiron Gazette - Humans Trophy Cabinet The Bright Crusaders
Whiteskull Challenge Cup - By Rusty Hoelle Winners (2431) The Bright Crusaders have veered between the quiet, noble grace of a Knightly Purity Cup Winners Order and the wide-eyed fanaticism of an extreme cult of Nuffle. Neither Those paying close attention grace nor undiluted faith however seems to have brought them much luck on to the dates will note that the pitch. They play be an extreme code and don’t believe in bending even somehow, the Crusaders won the most minor of laws, making them really stand out from all of their peers. the Whiteskull Challenge Cup 10 years before they History were officially formed. . . . 2417 – An orphaned child is adopted by the Order of the Unchallenged Call, a devout sect in Recruitment Policy the Nuffle faith, she is given the name Ingrid.
All players must be extremely 2438 – Now a young woman, Ingrid goes on the Prime Stadium Circuit Pilgrimage but is physically fit (it’s a tough appalled by what she saw. The lack of faith troubled her greatly and so she prayed game after all) and need to prove they are mentally sane 2441 – Having found financial backers, Ingrid sets up the Bright Crusaders and goes about (as outlined in the Holy trying to recruit players who meet her very, very exacting standards Guidelines of the sixth Appendix) and to have 2449 – Finally Ingrid has enough players to start a team! The team don’t perform that well memorized the rules by heart however and results are hard to come by inside out. As the rules currently come in 14 2463 – Results start to change when Peter Lowenhart joins from the Rostov Renegades. The volumes, each 1000 pages star Blitzer brings some actual talent and not just blind faith to the team and introduces the long, that’s a lot of reading! famous “Left Hook” formation, winning many games.
Typically, only Humans tend 2472 – The infamous Quagmire incident match takes place against the Elfheim Eagles. The to play on the Bright Eagles wizards cast the Quagmire spell 93 times during the game causing the Crusaders Crusaders but that there have stadium to sink into the earth and never be seen again. The Colleges of Magic were forced to been instances where Dwarfs change the rules, limiting teams to just one wizard per game. have been signed. 2485 – The Crusaders match against the Dark Renegades was abandoned due to lack of balls! Staff Dark Elf Pinespite Venge had a mutation where he secreted a sticky substance from his body and all 19 match balls stuck to him, breaking a NAF record! Ingrid the Pious was the owners and spiritual leader of 2489 – Following the collapse of the NAF, the Crusaders got into financial trouble and called in the Bright Crusaders, but a team of accountants. As soon as they showed their books to the accountants the Crusaders over the years she employed were closed immediately due to their financial peril! a string of different head coaches including – Cross Dressing
➢ Dolph “The Saint” Another clash with the Elfheim Eagles was called off due to the Crusaders new uniforms and Gurmann the weather. It was raining and so the Elfs may get muddy was reason enough, but the ➢ Father E.A. “The Padre” hideous designs the Crusaders wore were so last season darling! However, the Crusaders do Matten have a crack squad of Nuns to buff their armour mid-game should it ever get dirty during a ➢ Kurt Heilger game.
Clearly coaching the Thanks Fairy Much Crusaders requires the patience of a saint! The Bright Crusaders were the very first team to play a match against a Forest Folk team made up of Brownies, Pixies, Gnomes and Centaurs. The game was close as the scantily clad fairies proved a distraction even for the super pious Crusader players.
Gridiron Gazette - Humans Bad Bay Hackers Altdorf Hammers
- By Lastiges Weisschen Hammers fans need patience to watch their team play. A highly religious outfit, they only take to the The Hackers under the leadership of Captain ‘Peg’Leg’ Haaken prove astrogranite when the twin tailed that with the right ingredients, any team can enjoy success. comet can be seen in the sky.
Emblazoned in Green and Yellow, the Hackers have shot through the Blood Famous for one thing . . . Bowl ranks in recent years. Their rise to fame was kick started with the signing of star thrower Dunkel Hoffnung. It wasn’t too long before they had Some teams rarely if ever gain any poached Dirk Heldmann and Spinne Schonheit from the Reavers. These fame. Some seek to buy renown, three along with Ogre M’Grash KThragsh and Blitzer Rhett Cavre formed the however. You would probably never nucleus of a powerhouse team. of heard of the Averland Knights or the Hochland Lumberjacks if they The Hackers have enjoyed a great deal of success winning the Blood Bowl hadn’t have hired Bob Bifford for a (2560), making the final on two other occasions (2558, 2559) as well as season. winning the Spike! Magazine Open (2560, 2561) and the Tobazco Cup (2561). Middenplatz Manglers
Known to play anywhere, the Hackers games have taken them to the new Under the dubious leadership of world and the realm of chaos itself. Along the way they have suffered a Tyros Bundt, they follow the mantra high casualty rate and have used Undead, Treemen, Pygmies and Beastmen ‘Manglers never lose!”. Sadly, this is rarely the case. Despite winning the to pad out their roster. At times they are hardly human at all! Doom Bowl, they’ve rarely known success. It’s doubtful whether they should be considered a Human team at all in recent seasons after they hired Franco Fiducci the Necromancer. Most of their players are now Undead!
Averheim Archers
To their shame, the Archers were the first team to ever lose against the Lowdown Rats. The resulting riots from both teams forced the officials to reverse the results giving the win to the Archers – normal order had been restored!
That’s Magic!
Talabheim Titans – Who could forget the infamous match where a miscast spell caused the players, fans and cheerleaders to all switch bodies? Hilarious!
Hamblinn Bushwackers – A magical Piper played a tune and made the Bushwackers opponents, the Skaven Wyrdstone Wanderers, vanish never to be seen again. Strangely the Bushwackers coach is also missing!
Lucky Sevens – A team of the unluckiest players ever banded together and then couldn’t lose. Fate or magic?
Gridiron Gazette - Humans Port D’Aquitaine – the other Reavers Altdorf Ale-Hole
- By Pierce d’Organ The Ale-Hole is a seedy pub in Altdorf that has its own Street Campaigning as one of the oldest teams in far Bretonnia, the Blue Bowl team. They tell a tale in and White Reavers formed in 2387 have a more recent history of about former players in their courting controversy. amateur team who went on to make it big. A stable lad called One of the founding 4 teams of the Bretonnian league, the Reavers were Griff and a bouncer named Zug. the first team in the knightly lands to use team colours to help their players distinguish friend from foe. They were also the first Bretonnian Kicking it . . . . . team to construct a purpose-built stadium in 2399 which they dubbed the Rose Bowl due to the locals showering winning teams in roses. They do things differently in Albion and their teams rarely Names matter and the Reikland Reavers sued Port D’Aquitaine over the travel to foreign shores. During name Reavers. Despite the Bretonnians using the name for over 100 the FA cup the spend more years they lost and in 2492 were forced to become Port D’Aquitaine time kicking the ball – madness! Power. Therefor who has ever heard of the Kentish Kickers, Kingsbury In following year in 2493 they found themselves in trouble with the RARG Royals, New Albion Patriots, who deemed that teams of all Knights were unfair and so passed a ruling Notting Knights or the Blighty forcing Bretonnian teams to field lowly peasants as well! Blighters?
Ever chivalrous, they were voted Spike! Magazines team most likely to On the up . . . ? play fair in 2473, 2488 and 2498. Success in recent years has been rare with only the Orcidas Team of the Year trophy (2484) gathering dust in Nordland Rangers – Lack of their trophy cabinet. form saw the Rangers tumble down to the minor league 3 seasons ago. However, Blitzer Garr “The Thnderbolt” Greyg is back in form and they’ve just won promotion back to the big time.
Hochland Harbringers – Struggling to be average, the Harbringers have been on a number of decent cup runs since Blitzer Dreng Sturnblud returned from retirement. A team to watch next season!
Gone and mostly forgotten . . . .
Black Mountain Marauders – Baron Kurt Herzgerwoden promised to cover the players in gold if they won the Border Princes Cup. They did by fielding a giant causing the Baron and the team to go bust!
Haffenheim Hornets – Mistaken for a pre-match snack in 2460 and eaten out of existence by the Oldheim Ogres!
Stirland Hotspurs – In a match against the Slaaneshi Sidewinders, the Slaanesh scrimmage line mutated into Chaos Spawn and merged with the Hotspurs team in a giant fleshy mess! Yuck!
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Who’s Who . . . . Humanity’s finest . . . . and quite frequently Humanity’s deadest. Please note, the below does not include players who are exclusively play for the Reikland Reavers or any humans just playing in non-Human teams i.e. Old World Alliance, Imperial Nobility, Amazons, Norse, Chaos Renegades and Vampires.
Blitzers Name Team Status Andreas Waltheim Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars Baudwin the Strong Bright Crusaders Alive Deathblow ** Freebooter ** Alive Dirk Heldmann Reikland Reavers & Alive Bad Bay Hackers Dreng Sturnblud Rampagers & Alive Mootland Munchers & Hochland Harbringers Erik Kantona Leitdorf United & Alive Many others Gerhardt the Penitent Bright Crusaders Alive Gruber Nordland Rangers Alive Helmut Knacker Blazing Helms Dead – Pushed into the crowd and killed Johann Hapstein Lucky Sevens Alive Jules de Bergerac ** Freebooter ** Alive Jurgen the Upright Bright Crusaders Alive Karla von Kill Hochtstadt Hellfires & Alive ** Freebooter ** Kirta Hoffnung Lustrian Lusties & Alive Bad Bay Hackers Kurt Grafstein Talabheim Titans Alive Milo Hoffstetter Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars Nicholas Mynott Lucky Sevens Alive Peter “The Paladin” Lowenhart Rostov Renegades & Alive Bright Crusaders Rhett “Rocket” Carvre Bad Bay Hackers Alive Tyros Bundt Unknown Retired – now a Head Coach Ulfric Holzfeller Bright Crusaders Alive Ventris Adams Altdorf All-Stars Alive Zara “the Slayer” ** Freebooter ** Alive
Throwers Name Team Status Dunkel Hoffnung Bad Bay Hackers Alive Ernst Buonaviccio Bright Crusaders Alive Garr Greyg “The Thunderbolt” Nordland Rangers Alive “Gorgeous” Gerrick Hochland Harbringers Alive Gunter “The Mangler” Marius Hochland Harbringers Alive Hans “Sure Hands” Greta Ostermark Bulls Dead – Spine snapped by Grashnak Blackhoof
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Throwers - continued Name Team Status Heinrich Locke Lucky Sevens Alive Horst Mueller Middenplatz Manglers Alive Josef Englfot Altdorf All-Stars Dead – Heart ripped out by Count Luthor von Drakenborg Kur Ritternacht Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by Dunkel Hoffnung Luc Broussard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – stabbed in the eye during team try outs Norman “Swift aem” Wilburton Lucky Sevens Alive Siegfried Gutmann Bright Crusaders Alive Willem Tollet ** Freebooter ** Alive
Catchers Name Team Status Berkut Balcan Middenplatz Manglers Alive Big Gunn Schonn ** Freebooter ** Alive Boris ‘Omlette Face’Umberg Lucky Sevens Alive Brandan van Sant Bright Crusaders Alive Felix the Chaste Bright Crusaders Alive Frings Leiter Hochland Harbringers Dead – stomped to death by the Moonfang Maulers Frunk Hochland Harbringers Dead – killed by an explosion against the Bloody Ravagers Gigia Mardretti Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars Griegor Meissen Nuln College Alive – not to be confused with the other Griegor Meissen Guffle Pussmaw Rocktown Rumblers Alive – left to become a Nurgle Freebooter Guilarme ** Freebooter ** Alive Hans “Golden Shower” Schmidt Altdorf All-Stars Alive Heckle Flurburgh The Marauders Alive Hoshi Komi Creeveland Cresents Alive Johan Walsh Talabheim Titans Alive Kafre Es Isurio Flatlined Annihilators Alive Kelled Nordland Rangers Alive Klaus “Halfhand” Hochland Harbringers Alive Otto Waltheim Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Thrown off the top of a stadium by the crowd Percival Smythe Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Crushed to death by the Oldheim Ogres Quintus Altman Altdorf All-Stars Alive Robin le Sange ** Freebooter ** Alive Simon Sherwood Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Killed by a wolf headed team mate Singe de Fromage Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed in the Blood Bowl final Spinne “Black Widow” Schonheit Reikland Reavers & Alive Bad Bay Hackers Torvern Nordland Rangers Alive Vulf Nordland Rangers Alive Weissman Hochland Harbeingers Dead – squashed by a Death Roller of the Gilded Guild team Wilhelm Grimdolt Carrions Featsers & Alive Lucky Sevens Wolfhart Heldenhof Bright Crusaders Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Linemen Name Team Status Adam Kerse Lucky Sevens Alive Al-Abdul Abdullah Unknown Dead – stomped by a 1000 kickers in an Araby league match Anima Bad Bay Hackers Dead – drowned on a voyage to Lustria Anton Tikjers Bright Crusaders Alive Arik Sternright Bright Crusaders Alive Bantam Kentish Kickers Dead – pulled apart by the Undead of the Bad Bay Hackers Beriet Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria Camisa Roja Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria Ciotola Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria Clive Keegan Kentish Kickers Alive Christophe Baldurson Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by the Chaos All-Stars Conrad Knightstandt Bright Crusaders Alive Dirk Blunt Hochland Harbringers Alive Dirk Gallant Bright Crusaders Dead – Fell into a pit of lava while playing Dunegeon Bowl Drakwald Dan Stirland Hot-Spurs Dead – suffered a horrible mutation against Slaaneshi Sidewinders Drogo Bullhead Lucky Sevens Alive Ekerd Honurschine Bright Crusaders Dead – Fell into a pit of lava while playing Dunegeon Bowl Elegast Goedziel Bright Crusaders Alive Erhaltenes Spiel Bad Bay Hackers Alive Frank le Meat Unknown Retired Franklyn Smyth Bruendar Grimjacks Dead – killed in Sylvania, became part of Farnk ‘N’ Stein Friedrich Feather fingers Averland Knights Dead – killed by Rut Slamdunk of the Doom Lords Friedberger Nordland Rangers Alive Geborenes Vererteilt Bad Bay Hackers Dead – slaughtered by the Darkside Cowboys Gellert Holstein Talabheim Titans Alive Ginola le Ponce Unknown Retired Grieg Daavos Rostov Renegades Retired Guillermo Reyes Bad Bay Hackers Alive Gulden von Sulkhof Middenheim Marauders Retired – the kidnapper of Janet the goat! Hans the Doubtful Bright Crusaders Alive Haral Goodstar Bright Crusaders Dead – Killed by a Genestealer that appeared in Dungeon Bowl Harry “The Hammer” Kehry Creeveland Crescents Retired – now a dance teacher! Hartshorn Kentish Kickers Dead – Heart ripped out by the Undead on Bad Bay Hackers Henrick Karlmann Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Killed by a spiked ball to the head against the Chaos All-Stars Helmut Wulf Bruender Grimjacks & Alive ** Freebooter ** Jacques Grier Paravon Penetrators Dead – Beheaded against the Nightmare Nufflers Jacques Broussard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Stabbed to death in team try outs Jacques Rabelaus Bright Crusaders Alive Jager Haffa The Marauders Alive Jager Lightfoot Ostermark Bulls Dead – Had his legs pulled off by Grishnak Blackhoof Jameus Kaiser The Marauders Alive – plays as a ‘Kicker’ Jammernder Anfager Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria Jegal Torp Middenheim Marauders Dead – killed by Varag Ghoulchewer Johann Riko Bright Crusaders Alive Johann von Wilkins ** Freebooter ** Retired – played as a ‘kicker’ Johnny Atra Treetown Wolverines Dead – 2 Oldheim Ogre players made a wish with his legs Jorgan Bearson Lucky Sevens Alive Jorn Puresoul Bright Crusaders Alive Joshua le Grand ** Freebooter ** Alive Justus the Meek Bright Crusaders Alive Kai Albrecht Bad BayHackers Dead – Killed by the Gimlet the Lost and his chainsaw Karfheim Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Stabbed against the Darkside Cowboys Karsten “The Killer” Klemmer Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars Klaus the Forthright Bright Crusaders Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Linemen - continued Name Team Status Klimt Nordland Rangers Alive Kurt Brecher / Brother Mother Bright Crusaders Dead – Killed by a wizard lightning bolt Lance Goodfellow Bright Crusaders Alive Lars Engelhard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by the Chaos All-Stars Lucas Luckas Altdorf All-Stars Dead – Killed on scrimmage line against the Flalinned Annihilators Lugner Hoffnung Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed in a match in the realm of chaos McGraw Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed while playing against the Darkside Cowboys Majors Kentish Kickers Alive Muller Nordland Raiders Alive Neville Rooney Mancaster Knighted Alive Nigel Priestly Unknown Alive Olaf Kemperman Paravon Pentrators Alive Patric Broussard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – drowned on sea voyage to Bad Bay Pearce Talabheim Titans Alive Percy Kentish Kickers Dead – Beaten to death with a severed arm by Victor Shelley Phineas Crabbe Talabheim Titans Alive Punt O’Hamlet Middenheim Marauders Alive – played as a ‘Kicker’ Quan Yorbelvit Unknown Alive Rell Nordland Rangers Alive Rick Bupkeis Creeveland Crescents Dead – resurrected and plays for the Champions of Death Roight Cleane The Marauders Alive – played as a ‘Blocker’ Rupert ‘Naked’ Nickerson Lucky Sevens Alive Rupert Rupertson Albion All-stars Alive Sancho Bullhead Lucky Sevens Alive Schlechtes Gertunken Bad Bay Hackers Dead – drowned in a vat of Killer Genuine Draft Sicheres Gegangen Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by the Darkside Cowboys Siggi “The Boot” Schuster ** Freebooter ** Alive Sigur Nordman Hochland Harbringers Alive Silver Kentish Kickers Dead – kicked to death by Long John Stevenson Sister Mary Mister Bright Crusaders Dead – Kneck snapped by M-Grash K’Thragsh in a bar fight Solomon Graves Bright Crusaders Alive Sora Oflrsdottir Middenplats Manglers Alive Spencer von Lankyburg Middenheim Maulers Alive Standplatz Innen Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Killed by Darkside Cowboys Stanwell “The Spike” De Witt Middenheim Marauders Alive Steiner S Scottwell Bruendar Grimjacks Dead – killed in Sylvania, became part of Farnk ‘N’ Stein Stephan Kidsel Lucky Sevens Alive Ted Hammerstein Altdorf Griffons Alive Ullman Nordland Rangers Alive Ulrich the Viurtuous Bright Crusaders Dead – Eaten by a Rat Ogre in the Purity Cup final Wu Chen Unknown Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Ogres Name Team Status Bob Bifford Creeveland Crescents & Retired – now a sports pundit Many others! Dumpf Nordland Rangers Alive Ghurg Talbheim Titans Alive M’Grash K’Thragsh Bad Bay Hackers Alive Nog Nordland Raiders Retired Norg l’Mgung Unknown Alive “Tiny” Gar Hichland Harbringers Alive
Other Races The below are players from other races who through some strange twist of fate, ended up playing on a Human team.
Name Position Team Status Bavid Deckem Wight Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell Big Richard Pygmy Bad Bay Hackers Alive Edgar Treeman Bad Bay Hackers Alive Lemuel Swift Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell Long John Stevenson Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell Massif “Hungry” Bofine Minotaur Middenheim Marauders Alive Mimi Scream Banshee Middenplats Manglers Alive Oliver Dickens Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell Slim Thom Mountain Giant Black Mountain Marauders Alive Uthar Hagg Half-Orc Middenheim Marauders Retired – now a Head Coach Victor Shelley Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell Withergrasp Doubledrool Beastman Middenheim Marauders & Alive ** Freebooter **
Staff The staff below may be from other races but they have been employed by Human teams.
Name Position Team Status Albrecht Dollarsharp Owner / Coach Lucky Sevens Missing – presumed Dead Baron Kurt Herzgerworden Owner / Coach Black Mountain Marauders Missing – presumed Dead Bob Berobsson Head Coach Albion Wanderers Alive Captain ‘Peg-Leg’ Haaken Owner / Coach Bad Bay Hackers Alive Crumpo Master Chef Hochland Harbringers Alive Doc Morgrim Ironbane (Dwarf) Apothecary Middenplatz Manglers Alive Dolph “The Saint” Gutmann Head Coach Bright Crusaders Alive Dr Pill (Elf) Apothecary Bad Bay Hackers Alive Emilia Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive Father E.A. “The Padre” Matten Head Coach Bright Crusaders Alive Felix Stychman Apothecary Hochland Harbringers Alive Fergus Alexson Head Coach Mancaster Knighted Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Staff - continued Name Position Team Status Franco Fiducci Necromancer Middenplatz Manglers Alive Friedl Ground Staff Unknown Dead – Eaten by Toofy the Squig Gerritt Vanderwald Head Coach Talabheim Titans Alive Goran Slaver Head Coach Middenheim Marauders Alive Hogan Hellhammer Head Coach Hochland Harbringers Dead – In a match against Bloody Ravagers Horatio X Schottenheim Wizard ** Freebooter ** Alive Ignatio Wizard Hochland Harbringers Alive Ingrid the Pious Owner Bright crusaders Alive Jayes Lowener Head Coach Altdorf All-Stars Alive Johann Schmidt Owner Alotdorf Avengers Alive Juliana Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive Karl Groundstaff Unknown Alive Kruber Head Coach Hochstadt Hellfires Alive Kurt Heiliger Head Coach Bright Crusaders Alive Mariella Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive Mikal Fisk Apothecary Nordland Raiders Alive Olsen Merlin (Elf) Wizard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – died as the FA Cup was destroyed Rife Head Coach Nordland Rangers Alive Romana Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive Stephan Crass Head Coach Unknown Alive The Hackettes Cheerleader Bad Bay Hackers Alive Squad The Piper Musician Hamblinn Bushwackas Alive Tomas Assistant Coach Bright Crusaders Alive Tyros Bundt Head Coach Middenplatz Manglers Alive Vimmy Gloam Assistant Coach Middenheim Marauders Dead Wulfe the Drunkard Groundsman Bright Crusaders Alive
Officials Name Position Status Darun McGloan Referee Dead – killed during a pitch invasion in a Reavers v Gouged Eye match Doktor Brunner von Schaadelheim NAF Egineering Advisor Alive Erik Van Der Gann Referee Alive Gulden von Sulkhof Referee Alive Hanse Kohl Referee Dead – died of Nurgle’s Rot Hinter Assistant Referee Dead – Run over by a Deathroller Horst Oppenheimer NAF Committee Member Alive Max “Kneecap” Mittleman Referee Alive Mikael Vicorus Referee Dead – Eaten by Gnoblars Udo Troff NAF scribe Alive “Yellow” MacMurdy Referee Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Editors notes: Some of the players, staff and officials listed here may no longer be considered entirely human . . . but they were once when they started and so their ‘human’ selves are listed with their human originating teams.
The players here are also from a myriad of timelines – there are quite a number of decades from when we last saw Massif Bofine on the pitch (he would be considered a Gold Era star) compared to when the Bad Bay Hackers were formed.
Normally at Gridiron Gazette we would respect the wishes of officials to remain racially non-specific. However, due to the need to catalgoue as many as possible, a number of assumptions have been made on some of these officials being human. Likewise, others have been missed out (such as Nikk Threehorn) who will appear in a later issue more themed to them.
Looking ahead . . . .
In issue 2 of the Gridiron Gazette we’ll be focused on one team to finish off the Human review – the Reikland Reavers! Yes those glory boys have a history so rich that we can devote an entire issue to the Reavers and all of their staff and fans.
We’ll be Answering at such questions as . . . . .
➢ What is it with Griff Oberwald’s teeth? ➢ Talking of teeth . . . . why does Mighty Zug have so many . . . ? ➢ Just how many Griegor Meissen’s are there?
For all that and so much more, join us next month for a Reavers Gazette special – huzzah!