Read Ebook {PDF EPUB} The Lazlo Letters by Don Novello : How Don Novello Became The Priest Of Late Night TV. Father Guido Sarducci, alter ego of comedy writer Don Novello, rose to fame on in the '70s. Speaking in a thick Italian accent, Novello's chain-smoking Catholic priest would tout harebrained schemes for making the church more popular, or explain the minutiae or inner workings of the church. Sarducci became such a convincingly weird character that everything he said was just funny -- he almost didn't even need to crack jokes, as the persona, sometimes billed as a "rock critic" from , was so strong and entertaining. Novello was able to take the character beyond SNL , becoming a guest on other late-night TV shows and specials. To this day, Father Guido remains an audience favorite from SNL of the late-'70s and '80s. Don Novello Had Another Alter Ego: Lazlo Toth. On May 21, 1972, a man named Laszlo Toth attacked Michelangelo's Pieta statue in St. Peter's Basilica, Vatican City. Hacking away at the statue with a hammer, he shouted "I am Jesus Christ — risen from the dead!" It was an infamous event that was, at the same time, obscure -- the name Laszlo Toth seemed vaguely familiar for years afterward. As a young comedy writer, Don Novello experimented with a basic tactic, akin to prank calls -- writing funny letters to famous people or corporations. He signed his letters "Lazlo Toth," and actually got a fair number of genuine responses. These were collected and published in The Lazlo Letters in 1977. Here's an example: February 18, 1974. To: Mr. Bubble, Gold Seal Company. Dear Gentlemen: I want you to know first of all that I enjoy your product. It's always refreshing to spend some time in the tub with some bubbles. However, I must confess I am puzzled by some of the instructions on the box. It says: "KEEP DRY". How can you use it if you keep it dry? Thought you'd be interested to know someone like me caught the mistake. I thought you'd like to know. Sincerely, Novello later published the sequels Citizen Lazlo! and From Bush to Bush: The Lazlo Toth Letters . Father Guido Sarducci Predated Saturday Night Live. Don Novello bought the basic ingredients of the Father Guido Sarducci at a St. Vincent di Paul thrift store in 1973. The items were a hat, a collar, and a cape, and they cost Novello $7.50. He developed the character in San Francisco comedy clubs while also making headway in his real-life career as a comedy writer, and in the mid-'70s, he got the fairly prestigious job of writing for the revived Show . The program lasted just one season, but it's where Father Guido Sarducci made his national TV debut, in 1975. Father Guido Made His 'SNL' Debut On Crutches. When Saturday Night Live producer got ahold of The Lazlo Letters , he liked what he read. Michaels hired Novello as writer on SNL for the show's third season (1977-78). On May 13, 1978, Father Guido Sarducci appeared on Saturday Night Live for the first time in a monologue called "How Do You Pay For Your Sins?" Host Richard Dreyfuss introduced him as " the rock critic and gossip columnist for L’observateur Romano , the Vatican newspaper, and my spiritual advisor — Father Guido Sarducci!" and Novello took the stage wearing his Sarducci costume and leaning on crutches. Sarducci often began his chats or monologues with some gripe or tale of woe. On that night in 1978, he explained he'd been in an accident back in Rome -- run over by a nun on a Vespa. Guido Sarducci's First SNL Bit Later Became A Demotivational Meme. That first night, Sarducci's bit played on the quantifiable nature of Catholic faith. There is a base daily rate of pay for people, Sarducci explained, and then there are penalties for sins: A version of the gag would later show up on the internet in meme form. The Character Lampoons The Transactional Nature Of Catholicism. In another famous SNL bit, Sarducci took issue with the canonization of Elizabeth Ann Seton, which was big news at the time, as she would become the first Catholic saint born in what would become the United States. Anyone who grew up in the Roman Catholic faith is familiar with rules -- rules, rules and more rules. Not only are there a lot of rules, there are also consequences -- the well-known saying of Our Fathers and Hail Marys. Guido Sarducci is grounded in the culture of rules and quantifiable offenses, and he pulls the veil off of the mysticism by reducing church policy to bureaucratic hoops and "politics." When the late Seton (who died in 1821) was in the canonization process, Sarducci broke it down like an aggrieved TV-news talking head: Italian people with 60 miracles who can't get canonized -- because they're Italian. Brilliant. Father Guido Was Arrested By The Vatican Police. How did the Catholic church feel about Father Guido -- or were they even aware of the act? Novello got a clue on May 2, 1981, as he was arrested by the Vatican Police when he visited St. Peter's Basilica in costume. "Mr. Novello was also wearing a spaghetti-plate hat, cowboy boots and pink glasses," said the report in the New York Times . Novello was charged with impersonating a Catholic priest and taking photos without authorization. He was held for six hours, then released. Sarducci (Like Everyone) Covered 'Macarthur Park' In 1980, Father Guido Sarducci put out his first comedy album, Live At St. Douglas Convent . It included his famous bit "Five Minute University," which was a proposal for a school that would teach you everything a typical college grad remembers five years down the road -- which can be covered in about five minutes, including a snack break and graduation ceremony. In the same year, he also released the holiday novelty single "I Won't Be Twisting This Christmas." It wasn't his best work, although the B-side was conceptual comedy gold: "Parco Macarthur," an Italian- language cover of "Macarthur Park." By the early '80s, Sarducci had a life outside of SNL , with Novello appearing in character on Johnny Carson 's Tonight Show and David Letterman's Late Night . Sarducci also made cameo appearances in music videos by 's ("Rappin' Rodney," 1983) and Jefferson Starship ("No Way Out," 1984). Father Guido Sarducci continues to pop up as needed -- for example, when Pope John Paul II died in 2005, Sarducci did regular reports as a "Special Vatican Reporter" on 's Air America Radio while the Vatican elected Pope Benedict XVI. In 2010, Sarducci gave the opening benediction at Comedy Central's "Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear," a live event starring The Daily Show 's and 's . The Lazlo Letters: The Amazing Real-life Actual Correspondence of Lazlo Toth, American! [Paperback] Title: The Lazlo Letters: The Amazing Real-life . Publisher: Workman Pub. Co (1977) Publication Date: 1977. Binding: Paperback. Signed: Signed by Author(s) About this title. In letters to stars, dignitaries, and chairmen of the country's most powerful organizations, Don Novello's alter ego Lazlo Toth pestered his victims for photographs, offered outlandish advice, fired off strange inquiries, and more. The strangest part? Practically everyone answered, leaving Toth with a hilarious collection of outlandish correspondence unmatched in the history of American letters. The Lazlo Letters contains nearly 100 notes to public figures, including then-President Nixon, Vice President Ford ("I've been Vice President of a lot of organizations myself, so I know how you feel."), Bebe Rebozo, Lester Maddox, Earl Butz, and America's top business leaders. The replies, says the author, "classic examples of American politeness." In an on-going correspondence with the White House, Toth suggests everything from ridiculously corny jokes for the President to use, to a campaign song sung to the tune of "Tea for Two." He asks the president of a bubble bath company just how to use the product, as the packaging instructions specifically state to "keep dry." "No matter how absurd my letter was, no matter how much I ranted and raved, they always answered," reports the author. "Many of these replies are beautiful examples of pure public relations nonsense." One is not: columnist James Kilpatrick has a lone sentiment for Toth-"Nuts to You!" 247,000 copies in print. From the Back Cover: Lazlo Toth is my new hero! I don't know of anyone who has tried harder than he has to pull his own weight in the greatest of all democracies! Keep it up! Lean to your left-Lean to your right- Stand up, sit down-Fight! Fight! Fight! Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. The Lazlo Letters is a very funny book." -Chevy Chase. "The Novello-Toth combination is pure genius." -Tommy Smothers. "About this title" may belong to another edition of this title. We guarantee the condition of every book as it�s described on the Abebooks web sites. If you�re dissatisfied with your purchase (Incorrect Book/Not as Described/Damaged) or if the order has not arrived, you'r eligible for a refund within 30 days of the estimated delivery date. If you� have changed your mind about a book that you have ordered, please use the Ask bookseller a question link to contact us and we�ll respond within 2 business days. Orders ship within 2 business days. Shipping costs are based on books weighing 2.2 LB, or 1 KG. If your book order is heavy or oversized, we may contact you to let you know extra shipping is required. Books weighing over 4 lbs will be at least $30 for overseas orders. The Lazlo Letters by Don Novello. Most people might know Don Novello as "Father Guido Sarducci." But I don't think nearly enough people know that he has also been writing collections of brilliantly funny letters to politicians and corporate America as "Lazlo Toth" for the last 30 years . Lately a lot of extremely similar books have been published, and I feel compelled to let the world know that when it comes to this stuff, Don Novello is the trailblazer, the godfather, and the original gangsta of the prank letter. He recently published his latest edition called " From Bush to Bush: The Lazlo Toth Letters ," and I had the great pleasure of speaking with him. What I have always loved about the Lazlo books is that even though some of the letters date back to 1974, the comedy really holds up. Well, thanks. I worked a lot harder on this new one than the others. I don't know if you can tell, but there's more "writing" in it. You know there are other books that try to do the same thing, so I tried to change it. One thing I did was that I have all the companies that I made up. I even tried to write different letters in different tones. You know what I mean? Like I wrote to the Vatican, and the way [the letters] look -- it's kind of like a mad man wrote them. Others I wanted to look more professional, with a unique letterhead. Do you ever send letters as Lazlo through email? No I haven't. But with email you don't get the letterhead, you don't get the sense of who sent it. Anyone could have written it. It all looks like the same thing. But I got a letter from Gabe Kaplan recently-- I like Gabe Kaplan. One of the reasons I liked him was he talked slower than I do. I always thought my Sarducci was the slowest. But I get a letter from him saying he wanted to do something similar with e-mail. Only it would be different with his because he wanted to do it as himself. Well, over the years some books have come out that are disturbingly similar to yours. What do you make of them? Well, I have some thoughts on it. I think it's great that people write letters-- and to have helped inspire that. Especially with kids, because I was, and am, dyslexic. I never thought I'd be a writer. I never thought I'd be able to read a book, let alone write one. So if books like this inspire kids to write, or even read a whole book, I think it's good. But I'm kind of surprised that so many of those other books were almost exactly like mine. They even follow the form. Even like where I had the " NO REPLY " stamp I used to use. I quit using it, but there were some books that even copied the stamp. It shows so little imagination. So that's why I wanted to change it. You know, to make letterheads and things like that. I've changed it more than anyone has. The book "Letters from a Nut" was a big one. Seinfeld was behind that, right? You know, the Seinfeld thing is pretty interesting, from a marketing standpoint. The story is that Jerry "found" these letters, and took them to the publisher. So here's the interesting thing. Jerry goes on TV and denies writing them. But he promotes these books. The thing is, you never see who was writing them. If you want to do an interview with these people, you can't, because if they did people would know for sure that Jerry didn't write it. So he says he didn't, but people still wanted to know who did. You know, the one thing that I found with these other books was that it did make it harder for me to sell the later Lazlo books. I found that I got a lot of comments that they thought the genre is over. It's overexposed. You'd think those other books could have at least mentioned Lazlo Toth in the dedications. There was one guy in England who did something similar, and he did mention me in print. So how did it all start with the Lazlo letters? It started with one letter. I thought it would be funny to write to Spiro Agnew. And sign it "Lazlo Toth." Is there any significance to that name? Lazlo Toth is the name of the guy who attacked Michealangelo's Pieta in 1972 or 1973. It was only because he was in the news at the time. And I kinda thought it would be like from "culprit to culprit." So that's how it started. I wrote that letter, and the one to Nixon. At that point, did you already know it was going to be a book? No, at that point I knew it was just the one letter. But you had the foresight to save the copies of the outgoing letters. Yes. And I wrote more letters, and I thought it might be a magazine article. At that time I sent it to Esquire and Playboy, and somebody had said "Maybe it's a book. and not a magazine article." But anyway, for whatever reason I kept writing, and all of sudden I had enough and thought, well maybe it is a book. It's been 30 years. Did you ever think you'd keep it going for so long? No. I never did. It was really important to me when I started, you know, because of Watergate. Who would know that would happen? And even in this book (Bush to Bush) you never know where it's going to go. It's pretty interesting to me that you have letters following it all, you know? In a way, these books take their own direction. And that's why in this book, everything is like a big pallette of what's happened -- The O.J. trial and Monica Lewinsky, and Gary Condit. So I see all 3 books as really an oveview of the times. When the San Francisco Giants built their new stadium in 2000, it was designed so homeruns over the wall in right field would land in the water of the bay. There was a lot of talk at the time of what should happen to those homerun balls that landed in the water, so Novello wrote the following letter (click here or on the image) to the President of the San Francisco Giants. The Giants organization LOVED the idea and implemented it! Tell me about the San Francisco Giants and the Canine Baseball Retrieval Team. How's that going? Well, I go down there once a year for the first time that they introduce the new team. (LAUGHS) No, I go there as myself. But it worked out great. The Giants used a "no-kill" shelter called Pets in Need, where they got the dogs. Did you ever make any money off of the idea? No, but I hope to. I get some of the merchandising from the t-shirts, but we haven't done much. Hopefully it will grow into a bigger thing. But they give money to Pets in Need every year, which is a good thing. And they've had so many more dogs adopted, and everybody loves it. Baseball is so boring, it's like a little sidebar to baseball. Well, there's the proof that even though these letters were sent as a joke, a lot of the ideas in there are not bad at all. Some of them aren't! You know what's a really good idea? Is the Supreme Court Justice Robe. It was sent to Supreme Court Justice Chief Renquist, and the idea was that I wanted to make bathrobes in the design of the Supreme Court Justice's robe. But the other thing is this. I thought that Renquist came up with the gold stripes. He was the first guy to ever do that, so I thought it was his idea. And then I read that he went to a Gilbert & Sullivan play, and in the play, he saw this judge who had a robe like that. So he took that idea. I wrote to him and said my idea is like yours, but in terrycloth. So if Gilbert and Sullivan come after me and say I stole their bathrobe design, I didn't even see the play! I thought Renquist had the idea. How can they sue me? I thought I stole the idea from Renquist, I didn't know he stole it from the other guy. It's also interesting because you're writing to the Supreme Court. You know, the Chief Justice , but I didn't get a letter back. I sent it twice. I wanted him to comment on it. It's also a weird thing for this guy. The Supreme Court Justice never had a special robe. So to do that, is like, divisive. I always thought: doesn't Sandra Day O'Connor ever say, "You know, I've been in court for longer than Clarence Thomas. Maybe I should have one stripe." It's like he's a troublemaker, this guy. Look at what he's starting. It's like the chief has to have a bigger bonnet so people will know he's the chief. Do you ever go back and read through your old letters just for fun? Yeah, every once in awhile. You know, like now when I had this book coming out, I went back through them. Do the majority of the letters you write ultimately get published? Well, what I do is I edit them, not internally, but as a group of letters. So I have like 250 letters that I have to whittle it down to 150. Only then do you have the whole overview of a book. So with this book, the overview that I got when it was finally edited was, at least my take was, " everybody's lying ." You know? The Police Chief from San Francisco is a liar, isn't that something? And the priests, they're all lying, and the President lied under oath. But to me the worst was when the Poet Laureate lied. You know, to me I don't care if it's the President, but when poets have to lie, we're in bad shape. And when Campbell's soup said 20% more chicken, I just wanted to know what went. The can didn't get bigger. No! The can's the same size. Something had to go. So my point was if you're going to say "MORE" of something, you've got to say "LESS" of something else. So, all the outgoing letters in the book with the pictures on them. Are those copies of exactly what you sent out? Yes -- I don't know why, but when I gave the publisher all the stuff, you know you see like tape marks in there? That wasn't there in mine. My letters looked much better. They made them look worse. And all I can think is that somehow they wanted to for legal reasons. But they added to them, and I never felt great about it. The Lazlo Letters by Don Novello. Gender: Male Religion: Roman Catholic Race or Ethnicity: White Sexual orientation: Straight Occupation: Comic. Nationality: United States Executive summary: Comic priest Father Guido Sarducci. Don Novello first created Father Guido Sarducci in 1973, when he found the Vatican monsignor's outfit -- big floppy black hat, white clerical collar, and a long, red-trimmed black coat with cape -- for $7.50 at a St. Vincent de Paul thrift shop. "That was during Watergate," says Novello, "and I didn't want to be just somebody else talking about politics. I thought [the monsignor's suit] would give me some authority instead of being some guy from ." Augmented with sunglasses, a Fuller brush mustache, a smoldering cigarette and an Italian accent, Novello's Sarducci became popular in a San Francisco nightclub. His first big break came when Sarducci guested on San Francisco Channel 20's Chicken Little Comedy Show , and comic was watching. Steinberg hired Novello as a writer for a TV show that never aired, but he also introduced Novello to Tommy and Dick Smothers, and they hired Novello, too. Novello performed on The Smothers Brothers Show in 1975, but it was The Lazlo Letters , his first book of mildly insane letters to celebrities, that caught Lorne Michaels's attention. Written under the pseudonym Lazlo Toth (borrowing the name of the art vandal), Novello wrote borderline- sane letters to politicians from Richard Nixon to Earl Butz, and published the replies. The book was published in 1977, and Novello joined Saturday Night Live in 1978, where he remained until 1980. He also hosted an SNL in 1984, memorably nominating ZZ Top to run for President, and returned to SNL as a writer from 1985-1986. Since leaving SNL , he has also played Father Sarducci on , Blossom , It's Garry Shandling's Show , Married with Children , and a 1991 PBS "Great Performances" production of La Pastorela . He wrote for and produced two SCTV follow-ups in the early 1980s, SCTV Channel and SCTV Network '90 (without appearing in either series). In 1981, in character as Fr. Sarducci at the Vatican, Novello was caught taking snapshots in an area where photography is prohibited. He was arrested and charged with impersonating a priest. The real Lazlo Toth was also arrested in the Vatican. He spelled his name L�szl� T�th, and attended a 1972 mass at St. Peter's Basilica in Rome. Then, while the Pope prayed and everyone (including the guards) had their heads bowed and eyes closed, T�th hopped over a marble banister and used a sledgehammer to knock an arm off Michelangelo's Vatican Pieta, while shouting, "I am Jesus Christ!" T�th was acquitted on grounds of insanity, the statue was quickly repaired, and Vatican guards were instructed not to close their eyes during prayers. Novello and co-wrote Noble Rot , a comedy in which Belushi was to play a recovering alcoholic who goes on a weekend bender. Belushi reportedly poured his soul and his personal philosophy of life into the screenplay, and he was eagerly looking forward to playing the lead, but studio executives hated the script and rejected the idea. A few weeks later, when Belushi was found dead of a drug overdose, pages from Noble Rot were scattered across the floor. The script has never been filmed. Novello still earns a comfortable living as an actor and comic, and he has written two sequels to The Lazlo Letters . In 2005, Sarducci provided inside commentary on the selection of a new Pope, for radio's Al Franken Show . His sister-in-law, Dr. Antonia Coello Novello, was Surgeon General of the United States from 1990-93, under President George H.W. Bush. Father: Augustine Joseph Novello, Sr. (physician) Mother: Eleanor Finnerty Brother: Joseph R. Novello (child psychiatrist, author of The Myth of More ) Wife: (m.) Novello Don Sarducci Father Guido. Illustrated Wrappers. Condition: Near Fine. First Edition, First Printing [stated]. Wonderful collection of actual latters to celebrities and politicians, with his unique fawning scarcasm. From Bush to Bush. The Lazlo Toth Letters. First Edition. Signed By Don Novello as Himself and as "Lazlo Toth." Wrappers. 2003. Novello, Don (Father Guido Sarducci) Published by Simon and Schuster, New York, 2003. First Edition Signed. Used Condition: As New. Condition: As New. Illustrated (illustrator). First Edition. First edition. Original pictorial wrappers (there was no hardback edition). Number line ending in "1." This is the third and final book in the "Lazlo Toth" series. Signed on the front-free end paper: "Saluti Don Novello." Signed by Novello on the title page "Lazlo Toth." Signed in my presence during his signing tour, in Los Angeles, at Vroman's bookstore in Pasadena. As new. Signed by Author. Tell us what you're looking for and once a match is found, we'll inform you by e-mail. Can't remember the title or the author of a book? 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