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The Role of Connectedness in Self-Compassion and Compassion for Others Kaitlin S

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The Role of Connectedness in Self-Compassion and Compassion for Others Kaitlin S https://doi.org/10.24839/2325-7342.JN25.4.349 The Importance of Flexible Relational Boundaries: The Role of Connectedness in Self-Compassion and Compassion for Others Kaitlin S. Snyder and Andrew F. Luchner* Department of Psychology, Rollins College ABSTRACT. Self-compassion and compassion for others have largely been studied independently. However, when studied as separate but related constructs, clear self-other differences emerge. Although intrapersonal and interpersonal differences are perhaps best explained through personality theory, specifically Blatt’s (2008) 2 polarities model, limited research has specifically examined the impact personality organization has on the capacity to extend compassion to oneself and others. The present study examined how personality organization according to 2-polarities model of personality is related to and impacts self-compassion and compassion for others. Participants (N = 226) completed a series of self-report questionnaires online to assess personality organization and compassion competencies. Results yielded 2 predictive models of compassion. Efficacy (+), self-criticism (−), and connectedness (−) predicted self-compassion (R² = .47, p < .001). Efficacy (+), self-criticism (−), and connectedness (+) predicted compassion for others (R² = .36, p < .001). Model disparities elucidate key differences between the constructs, specifically that healthy and flexible relational boundaries are essential for self-compassion, while feelings of security and stability within personal relationships are more important for showing others compassion. Understanding how differences in personality proclivities relate to the nuances in self-compassion and compassion for others may aid therapeutic intervention targeting compassion capacities. Keywords: connectedness, relatedness, self-compassion, compassion for others ndividuals vary greatly in their capacity to compassion for others and highlights the need to have compassion for themselves and others. explore self-other differences that exist between IThese variations are in part attributable to the phenomena. what helps or gets in the way of showing oneself Blatt’s (2008) two-polarities model of personal- and others compassion. For example, harsh ity provides a theoretical framework from which self-judgement, attributing suffering to personal to examine the self-other differences that exist failings, and overidentification with one’s pain between self-compassion and compassion for oth- all hinder self-compassion in the face of suffering ers. The two-polarities model describes the lifelong (Neff, 2003). Although empirical literature dialectical synergistic interaction between develop- concerning compassion continues to grow, self- ing and maintaining a positive identity (i.e., issues compassion and compassion for others have largely of self-definition) and reciprocal, stable relation- been conceptualized and studied independently, ships with others (i.e., issues of relatedness) as core hindering an examination of the relationship processes in personality development and orga- between the two constructs. Gilbert and colleagues nization (Luyten & Blatt, 2013). In other words, WINTER 2020 (2017) have remedied this issue by creating a Blatt and colleagues suggested that developing a PSI CHI theory that includes both self-compassion and coherent sense of self supports the maturation and JOURNAL OF PSYCHOLOGICAL RESEARCH *Faculty mentor COPYRIGHT 2020 BY PSI CHI, THE INTERNATIONAL HONOR SOCIETY IN PSYCHOLOGY (VOL. 25, NO. 4/ISSN 2325-7342) 349 Flexible Relational Boundaries | Snyder and Luchner development of mutually beneficial relationships, psychological development (Blatt, 2008; Mongrain which reciprocally facilitates the development of & Zuroff, 1995). Furthermore, a severe imbalance an increasingly integrated sense of self. However, or overconcern with identity formation to the detri- disruptions in the synergistic relationship between ment of connecting with others, and vice versa, self-definition and relatedness can impede healthy halts developmentally appropriate maturation in personality development (Luyten & Blatt, 2013). the polar task and disrupts personality develop- Although some studies have utilized personal- ment (Blatt & Luyten, 2009; Luyten & Blatt, 2011). ity measures (e.g., the Big Five) when examining Through the examination of shared common constructs related to positive psychology, mental dynamics, conflicts, defenses, and vulnerabilities, health, and subjective well-being (Barnes & the two-polarities model identifies self-critical and Mongrain, 2019), no studies have explored the dependent personality organizations resulting from relationship between self-other models of personal- exaggerated concerns with self-identity or interper- ity organization, self-compassion, and compassion sonal relationships, respectively (Blatt & Luyten, for others. Furthermore, none to our knowledge 2009; Blatt & Maroudas, 1992). According to Blatt have yet explored the impact of self-definition and (2008), individuals who are overly concerned with relatedness processes on compassion capabilities. issues of the self, often involving independence or With the aim of resolving this deficit, the present autonomy, control, self-worth, and identity, have study examined the relationship between self- an introjective or self-critical personality organiza- definition and relatedness and the ability to be tion. Individuals who are excessively concerned self-compassionate and compassionate to others. with interpersonal issues, typically involving love, attachment, and trust, have an anaclitic or dependent Two-Polarities Model of Personality: personality organization. Due to the synergistic Self-Definition and Relatedness nature of the polarities, excessive preoccupation An exploration of the self-other differences that with one developmental task inherently halts devel- exist between self-compassion and compassion for opmentally appropriate maturation in the other, others is best achieved through first examining increasing vulnerability to psychopathology (Besser the intrapersonal and interpersonal differences & Priel, 2005; Blatt, 2008; Blatt & Luyten, 2009). described by Blatt’s two-polarities model of per- For example, self-critical personality organization sonality. Two-polarities theory postulates that the has been consistently associated with pathology dialectic interaction between self-definition and (e.g., depression, negative affect; Besser & Priel, relatedness are integral components of personality 2005; Mongrain & Zuroff, 1995; Thompson & development throughout the lifespan (Blatt, 2008). Zuroff, 2004). However, there seems to be both Self-definition involves establishing an individuated, adaptive and maladaptive expressions of depen- generally positive self-identity. Relatedness involves dency: neediness and connectedness (Blatt et al., 1995; establishing intimate, stable, mutually beneficial Rude & Burnham, 1995; Shahar, 2015). Neediness relationships with others. According to the two- indicates an indiscriminate overconcern with polarities model, healthy personality development abandonment and separation that is associated occurs as individuals repeatedly overcome issues with depression, whereas connectedness indicates related to the self to increase autonomy and the adaptive concern one feels about specific rela- issues concerned with relatedness to form more tionship issues that is associated with psychological mature relationships (Luyten & Blatt, 2013). well-being (Blatt et al., 1995). Similar self-other personality dimensions (e.g., Although maladaptive personality organiza- autonomy and sociotropy, attachment avoidance tions primarily describe individuals within clinical and attachment anxiety) have been found across populations experiencing extreme disruption cognitive, attachment, and self-determination in tasks of self-individuation and interpersonal theories as well (Beck et al., 1983; Bowlby, 1980; relating, self-criticism and neediness also refer Ryan & Deci, 2000). Because the development of to less extreme personality disruptions within an autonomous self cultivates increasingly mature nonclinical populations. Individuals with self- relationships with others, and healthy attachments critical personality proclivities tend to exhibit with others facilitates an increasingly mature and assertiveness, high personal standards, needs for WINTER 2020 integrated self, a balanced interaction between recognition, criticism toward the self and others, PSI CHI each dimension is necessary for the maturation and perfectionism (Blatt, 2008; Lingiardi et al., JOURNAL OF of adaptive personality organization and healthy 2017). Contrastingly, needy personality proclivities PSYCHOLOGICAL RESEARCH 350 COPYRIGHT 2020 BY PSI CHI, THE INTERNATIONAL HONOR SOCIETY IN PSYCHOLOGY (VOL. 25, NO. 4/ISSN 2325-7342) Snyder and Luchner | Flexible Relational Boundaries are more often associated with concerns regarding highly self-compassionate individuals reported separation and abandonment, affection-seeking, being equally caring toward themselves and submissiveness, introjected aggression, and a lack others whereas those with low self-compassion of boundaries between self and other (Kopala- reported treating others kindlier than themselves Sibley et al., 2013; Rude & Burnham, 1995). (Hermanto & Zuroff, 2016). However, other find- Because examining the shared cognitive, affective, ings have not substantiated a significant relation- and relational styles typical of both
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