DEVOTIONAL

Adulting 101

STUDENT GUIDE

SCHOOLINLIFEPOD.COM Copyright Notice

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photo copying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without the prior written permission of the author. Requests to the author for permission should be addressed to [email protected].

All Content is Copyrighted © 2020 By Ashley A. Adams, Schoolin Life, LLC All Rights Reserved Schoolin Life Devotional: “Adulting 101”

Schoolin Life was asked by one of our listeners to develop material for a church small group. We are delighted to expand our existing content about adulting (one of our most popular topics) into a facilitated 8-week devotional guide. Schoolin Life is regularly hosted by Ashley and Marcy, but for this special project, Ashley is joined by Andre, a longtime listener and supporter of the show.

Schoolin Life

Schoolin Life started as a podcast, with a vision to extend my standard “girlfriend” conversations to a wider audience. I realized that not all women had access to the thoughtful, impactful, and affirming conversations I had with my friends, and I wanted to share what I had with others. Now Schoolin Life is a lifestyle brand that still includes a weekly podcast, hosted by Ashley and Marcy, and also live events, a blog, merchandise, and mentoring for new and mid-level professional women through the Mentor Me platform. Schoolin Life blends my passions for education, storytelling, lifestyle blogging, mentorship, and personal and professional development. Even with this expansion, the vision hasn’t changed. Schoolin Life still exists to have those same conversations but to impact more people, and share the authentic mission of helping women “school life” with a wider audience.

“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” Heb 10:24-25

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 3 Meet Ashley

I’m a big sister, empath, acting vice president of the #Beyhive and founder of Schoolin Life. My primary passions revolve around home décor and design, hosting house parties and fostering hilarious conversations through podcasting. My love for schoolin’ others and personal development started at a young age, as my favorite childhood game was “playing school.” Now I don’t play but do; I turned the game into reality. I earned a Ph.D. in Higher Education Administration in 2015 and currently serve as the director of student affairs at a prominent R1 research institution in the Northeast and as a faculty member in the university’s College of Education. Schoolin Life has forced me to be more honest, introspective, and compassionate and the fact that it serves as a resonating sounding board for so many others inspires me every day.

Meet Andre

I am a native of Orangeburg, South Carolina, the City of 1,000 Azaleas. I am passionate about diversity, equity, inclusion and my walk with Christ. Known for both my preppy school boy dress and my love for Jordans, I married the two to represent my personality. Using my talents and passion, I am currently a doctoral student in my last year of coursework. My research is focused on the academic experience of Black males in cultural greek organizations. I am currently a senior administrator in student affairs at The Pennsylvania State University at University Park, Pennsylvania. As an avid listener and supporter of Schoolin Life my work is enhanced through a lens only which could be seen as a student in the Schoolin Life classroom.

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 4 Letter to the Class:

Your being here tells us that you are committed to following God and His direction and commandments for your life. Too many Christians hesitate to study His word and use it to guide their life so we’re extremely proud of your commitment to the study of this devotional guide. Thank you for taking the step to invite God and Schoolin Life into your lives, learning how to adult at your best.

Adulting is hard and there are so many rules on how to do it right and wrong, so if you’re feeling overwhelmed at the start, you’re not alone. Know however that God’s plan for your life is clear and He will reveal it to you if you believe. This devotional guide is designed to walk you through the core principles of adulting and what the Bible and fellow believers have to say about living our best adult lives.

This devotional guide is designed to help you understand the core principles of adulting, connect biblical principles and God’s word with this millennial term and provide some reflection and direction as you adult.

We believe that this devotional guide is coming to you during a season for you to make a shift into new thinking and new possibilities. We pray for each of you here and look forward to the testimonies and breakthroughs that you experience together.

Best of Blessings,

Ashley and Andre

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 5 Table of Contents: Devotional Framework of Weekly Episodes

Week 1: Defining Adulting We discuss what adulting really means and the key components of adulting with purpose.

Week 2: Money in the Bank: Personal Finances We discuss the key principles of money management for millennials and share our own personal finance journeys.

Week 3: Making and Maintaining Relationships We discuss the power and importance of relationships and why human and Godly connections still matter in the age of technology.

Week 4: Managing Up/Across at Work We discuss work and how to leverage your position and power to boss up.

Week 5: Care and Advocacy for Self and Others We discuss self-care, self advocacy, and why you need both to be well and care for others.

Week 6: The Mentee and The Mentor We discuss the power and importance of the mentor/mentee relationship and why every adult needs both to advance.

Week 7: Living Out Your Dreams We discuss living out your dreams, doing it scared, and why your dreams shouldn’t die because you are an adult.

Week 8: Adults Just Want to Have Fun We discuss the power of play and how having fun as an adult is necessary for fulfillment and living out your purpose.

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 6 Week 1: Defining Adulting

On this week’s episode, we discuss what adulting really means and the key components of adulting with purpose. The American Dialect Association nominated the word “adulting” as the word of the year in 2016. At the time, it described a new term that millennials were using to describe their engagement in adult behaviors. Adulting represents things like buying a house, navigating your relationship with your boss, or even going grocery shopping while following a budget; it’s all the little (and big things) we have to do as adults. When we reflect on our young adulthood, we were so eager to grow up, but now many of us are wishing for the freedom of being young again. Listen as Ashley and Andre discuss what adulting means to them, their adulting wins (and a few of their failures), and what it means to be an adult and a believer today.

1. How would you define adulting? Why do you think the phrase is so common? 2. When did you first realize you were an adult? 3. What are your most common adulting behaviors? Which do you love? Which do you dread? 4. 1 Corinthians 13:11 states “When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things.” How does this verse relate to your experience with moving into adulthood? 5. By the age of 30, Jesus had a job He loved, was #passport goals, and had a tight circle of friends, no squares (well maybe a couple, but you get the idea.) Do you think that Jesus’s life is a good example of adulting for us today? 6. What advice would you give to someone who is struggling with the basic tenets of being an adult?

Additional Readings: Songs/Podcast Episodes: • Big Idea Food: A Weekly • Schoolin Life podcast episode Devotional for Entrepreneurs, “Adulting 101” Side Hustlers & Dreamers by • Mary Mary “Slow Walk” Marlena Banks • Tye Tribbett “Can’t Live” • Ephesians 2:10 (LIVE) • Hillsong UNITED “Scandal of Grace”

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 7 Week 2: Money in the Bank: Personal Finances

On this week’s episode, we discuss the key principles of money management for adults. Our good Christian brother, Chistopher Wallace (known to some as The Notorious B.I.G.), famously told us “Mo Money Mo Problems” and we couldn’t agree more. Yeah sure, we finally have McDonald’s money but being good stewards of our coins, tithing, paying our bills (on time), and trying to save a little for a rainy day is exhausting. Listen as Ashley and Andre talk about their relationship with money, their personal finance methods, and what being a Christian has taught them about money.

1. Growing up, how did your family talk about God and money? 2. What is your current relationship with money? Is this relationship full of lies? 3. What are your top three personal finance mantras? 4. With more than 1000 references to money and finances throughout the Bible, clearly God was trying to tell us something (shoutout to Shug Avery). • 1 Timothy 6:10 • Acts 20:35 • Proverbs 22:7 • Phillipians 4:19 What do these Scriptures tell us about what God wants us to do with our money? 5. Do you think Christians have The Poverty Mindset? 6. What advice would you give to a Christian who is working to build foundational personal finance principles?

Additional Reflection Questions: How has your relationship with money changed over time? What are you teaching others in your life about money, based on your example?

Homework: Track your spending for one week. How are you spending your money? Is it in ways that advance God’s purpose for your life and the Kingdom?

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 8 Additional Readings: Songs: • 1 Timothy 6:10 • “Silver and Gold” • Acts 20:35 • Kirk Franklin “OK” • Proverbs 22:7 • Donald Lawrence and The Tri-City • Phillipians 4:19 Singers “The Blessing of Abraham” • Lindsey Stanberry Money Diaries • Anita Wilson “Jesus Will” • Maurette Brown Clark “Just Want to Praise You”

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 9 Week 3: Making and Maintaining Relationships In the Digital Age

On this week’s episode, we discuss the power and importance of relationships and why human and Godly connections still matter in the age of technology. With Tinder, GroupMe, WhatsApp, and Instagram DMs, it’s a wonder anyone connects in person anymore. Using technology to build relationships is great for fast and constant communications but can be a breeding ground for miscommunication and misconceptions. Listen as Ashley and Andre talk about how they leverage technology to build meaningful relationships, what relationships they use/don’t use technology in, why Sunday morning services still matter, and what God really thinks about your messy imessage chats.

1. Apple has this messy feature where they give you your weekly usage summary. How much time do you spend on your phone on a weekly basis? (and don’t say it’s all on the Bible app!) 2. What role does technology currently play in creating and sustaining your personal relationships, what apps are you using most frequently? 3. Noting how dependent we are on our technology to create and maintain relationships, what pitfalls exist noting our reliance on this method? 4. Have you ever been a member of the Bedside Baptist Church? What is your take on the live streaming of service and attending church remotely? 5. How does God show up in your relationships? 6. In Judges 18:27-29, Micah was in need of rescue but was far away from home and had no friends in the new land. As Christians, too often we haven’t taken the time to build meaningful relationships to have people to call on in our time of need. What can we do to ensure that we always have relationships with people in the land we’re in? 7. In Ephesians 4:29, we are reminded that the words we use should be uplifting others according to their needs. What does this verse say about your messy iMessage chats? How are these conversations supporting and enhancing others?

Homework: Review and reflect on your online conversations and engagements. Is your faith evident in these interactions? If not, do some clean up this week.

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 10 Additional Readings: Songs: • Judges 18:27-29 • Bishop Hezekiah Walker “I Need • Ephesians 4:29 You To Survive” • Colossians 3:12-13 • Yolanda Adams “Open My Heart” • The Williams Brothers “Sweep Around” • Mary Mary “Love You That Much” • Anthony Brown and group therAPy featuring Jonathan McReynolds “Real”

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 11 Week 4: Managing Up and Across At Work

On this week’s episode, we discuss work and how to leverage your position and power to manage up. Managing up is the most critical career skill for new and mid-level professionals today. Your ability to leverage your skills and talents to advance your career and the Kingdom is a part of God’s plan for your life and work. Listen as Ashley and Andre discuss what managing up is, how they’ve used it across their career journey, how they use their work to serve God’s people, and what the corporate clapback means for Christians.

1. How would you define managing up and leading in the workplace? 2. At many organizations, diversity of thought and identity are valued. What challenges have you experienced when you have to manage up and lead across differences? 3. How is your faith represented in your work? Do you feel empowered to share your faith and witness to others on the job? 4. Colossians 3:23-24 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” What does this scripture mean to you as a modern working professional? 5. Lyda (Acts 16:14-15) and Phoebe (Romans 16:1-2) are women who utilized her gifts and resources to glorify God through serving His people. How can we utilize their examples of using our gifts and talents to honor God with our work? 6. Has your faith ever been tested at work? What was the scenario and how did you respond?

Homework: Assess your relationship with your team, boss, and primary stakeholders. Is your faith evident to them? If not, think about how you can ensure that God is present in your work.

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 12 Additional Readings: Songs: • Colossians 3:23-24 • William Murphy “It’s Working” • Acts 16:14-15 • Anthony Brown & group therAPy • Romans 16:1-2 feat. Jonathan McReynolds • Suddenly in Charge: Managing “Real” Up, Managing Down, • Le’Andria Johnson “Endow Me” Succeeding All Around by • Shirley Caesar “What A Friend Roberta Chinsky Matuson We Have In Jesus” • Dare to Lead by Brené Brown

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 13 Week 5: Care and Advocacy for Self and Others

On this week’s episode, we discuss self-care and self advocacy and why you need both to care for yourself and others. When it comes to self-care, we often think of bubble baths and mani/pedis, but more often, self-care looks like saying (and respecting) “No,” setting boundaries, and doing the hard thing. You can’t pour from an empty cup and thus self- care is essential as you care for yourself and others. Listen as Ashley and Andre talk about their experiences with self-care, where they struggle, how they advocate for self-care in an increasingly busy work, and how they care for others.

1. How would you define self-care, and what does it look like for you? 2. When do you find self-care most difficult? 3. How do your Christian values challenge or support self-care practices? How so? 4. One form of self-care is prayer, which is evidenced by Nehemiah’s story. How can we use her example to practice self-care and advocacy in our daily lives? 5. In the movie, War Room, the main character, Elizabeth, practiced self-care through her prayer life while the world as she knew it was crumbling around her. What can we learn from her self-care practice, and how it can impact our own lives and the lives of those we love?

Homework: Self-care sometimes means saying “no.” What can you say “No” to right now to improve your ability to care for yourself?

Additional Readings: Songs: • The Book of Nehemiah • Andraé Crouch “Let The Church • Ephesians 2:10 Say Amen” feat. Marvin Winans • Philippians 4:6-8 • Donald Lawrence “Say a Prayer” • Genesis 2:2-3 feat. • 1 Corinthians 3:16, 6:19-20 • Donald Lawrence “Deliver Me” • The Gifts of Imperfection by feat. Le’Andrea Johnson Brené Brown • The Winans and Anita Baker • Dangerous Prayers by Craig “Ain’t No Need to Worry” Groeschel

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 14 Week 6: The Mentee and Mentor

On this week’s episode, we discuss the power and importance of the mentor/mentee relationship and why every adult needs both to advance. Mentorship is the cornerstone of personal, professional, and spiritual development. As the psalmist Bishop Hezekiah Walker declared, “I love you, I need you to survive.” This is true more now than ever. Mentors serve as a point of reference, to provide strategy and support, and to give us gentle direction when we’re wrong. Listen as Ashley and Andre discuss who their mentors are, how they leverage their mentor/mentee relationship to advance personally, professionally, and spiritually and how they actively serve as mentors to others.

1. Who is currently mentoring you? How did you find them? 2. How have mentors shown up for you across your life, personally, professionally and spiritually? 3. Who are you mentoring right now? How did you form this relationship? 4. Is there a difference between supervision, mentorship, sponsorship and a sounding board? How do you distinguish the difference, and why does it matter? 5. How does our relationship with God mirror the relationship between a mentee and a mentor? 6. Mary, mother of Jesus, was also a mentor to Elizabeth during her pregnancy, helping her draw closer to Christ during this time. What can we learn from Mary’s mentorship? 7. If our listeners do not presently have a mentor, how might they identify one? 8. those we love?

Homework: Already have a mentor? Check in with them this week as you plan for personal, professional and spiritual growth for the months ahead.

Additional Readings: Songs: • Luke 1:25-56, the story of • “Love So Pure” Mary as a mentor • “Lead Me, Guide Me” hymnal • Dare to Lead by Brené Brown • Mahalia Jackson “Take My Hand, • Titus 2:3-5 Precious Lord” • Romans 8:30 • Tori Kelly “Never Alone” feat. • Mentor Me Website (mentor- Kirk Franklin me.org)

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 15 Week 7: Living Out Your Dreams

On this week’s episode we talk about living out your dreams, doing it scared, and why your dreams shouldn’t die in adulthood. Doctor, lawyer, preacher, teacher…that might have been all you knew as a young child and your dreams were tied to what you thought was possible for your worldview. However as adults, we know that the world is more expensive, provides more possibilities, and allows us to dream more than one dream. Listen as Ashley and Andre talk about what they dreamed of being “when they grew up,” how the world and their faith has shaped their dreams, if it’s possible to live out your dreams, and what they’re dreaming of next.

1. As a child, what did you dream of being? 2. How have those dreams manifested or changed over time? 3. In the Bible, God often came to believers in dreams. How does your faith inform or activate your dreams? 4. Have you ever had a dream so big it scared you? How do you navigate fear and your future? 5. Joseph was a dreamer whose dreams told his future. What are your current dreams telling you about what is ahead? 6. Millennials love to say they are “their ancestors’ wildest dreams” and Acts 2:17 says the same. In what way are you an embodiment of what your ancestors prayed for?

Additional Readings: Songs: • Genesis 37-50, the story of • Minister Derrick Bull & Remnant Joseph “In His Presence” • Acts 2:17 • Shirley Murdock “Dream” • Numbers 12:6 • Anita Wilson “Speechless” • Joel 2:28 • Jonathan Nelson “I Am Your • Awaken: 90 Days with the God Song” who Speaks by Priscilla Shirer • In His Image: 10 Ways God Calls Us to Reflect His Character by Jen Wilkin

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 16 Week 8: Adults Just Want to Have Fun

On this week’s episode, we talk about the power of play and how having fun as an adult is necessary for fulfillment and living out your purpose. Rules, policies, and guidelines control our everyday lives, but as Christians we’re called to rejoice! Too often as Christians, we think about what we can’t do but in God there is freedom and free will. On this week’s episode, Ashley and Andre talk about what’s bringing them joy, giving them life, and how they find joy in little and big ways while glorifying God.

1. What is fun to you? 2. What everyday things bring you joy? 3. With so much sorrow, pain, confusion, and dismay in the world, how do you remain hopeful and full of joy? 4. What are your thoughts on the concepts that Christianity is regulated by rules and policies that negate free will? 5. While it wasn’t on TikTok, David used his dance moves to exalt the Lord. When was the last time you danced the way David danced?

Homework: Psalms 30:5 says that “weeping may endure for the night but joy comes in the morning.” How can you ensure that your morning routine inspires joy?

Additional Readings: Songs: • 2 Samuel 6:14-22 • Whitney Houston “Joy” feat. The • Psalms 30:5 Georgia Mass Choir • Philippians 4:4 • Whitney Houston “Joy to the World” feat. The Georgia Mass Choir • The Georgia Mass Choir “He’s All Over Me” • Mary Mary “Joy” • Byron Cage “I Can’t Hold It”

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 17 We Made It.

Thank you for participating in the Schoolin Life Devotional series. We pray that it has been as impactful for you as it has been for us. Andre and I shared our hearts, truths, and our funniest stories about adulting in Christ and we pray that in your small groups, you did the same. We are not meant to walk alone in this Christian journey so please don’t be a stranger.

Stay connected with us by joining our mailing list at schoolinlifepod.com and follow us on Instagram @schoolinlifepodcast.

SCHOOLIN LIFE DEVOTIONAL: “ADULTING 101” 18