"De Niro Said to Mes. Jer E Can't Socialize, We Can't Go Out.9 I Said, 6Bobby, Whatever Turns You On, Sweetheart."'9
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"De Niro said to mes. Jer e can't socialize, we can't go out.9 I said, 6Bobby, whatever turns you on, sweetheart."'9 ty as a student of cinematography, film got his due. I was the only one who really (including The Bellboy, Rockabye, Don't editing, and stage direction, especially dur- let him know how fucking sensational he Give Up the Ship), routinely giving his de- ing the last of the Martin-Lewis shoots, of- was, how his timing was right on the mon- tractors the stiff-arm. For a while, Jerry ten went unchallenged. Lewis's long-term ey, how he gave up his first love, his sing- could do no wrong. contract with Paramount in early I959 ing, put that on the back burner because it Subbing for Jack Paar in the winter of called for fourteen films at $i0 million-an got in the way of the two-man comedy act. 196z, Jerry got rave reviews. When NBC unheard-of sum at that time. And after ten years of it, of knowing full eventually went with Carson to succeed In i96i, while Jerry strolled around the well that the only reason the silly little bas- Paar, ABC offered Lewis his own talk Paramount lot with CHILD STAR mono- tard is up on the chandelier is because he show, in a format similar to the Toni^(lbt grammed on his shirt pockets, the studio put him there, he had to have had a bellyful Show. Months before the show's de'*:: was busy fulfilling his latest demand: con- of it-you can end up with a fucking cancer the trade papers were abuzz with repor [ structing an exact duplicate of the storied after that. And I got news for ya. If the ta- of Jerry's $75-million paycheck. His con- Hollywood Studio Club-a boardinghouse bles had been turned, we woulda split five tract called for forty Saturday-night for aspiring actresses. Dubbed "Jerry's years sooner, 'cause I couldn't have taken it shows; after the thirteenth, he was pres- half-a-million-dollar playhouse," the struc- for ten years.'' sured into quitting. ture would serve as the movie set for The It was natural, then, for the public to "Why? I could give you half a dozen rea- Ladies' Man, written, directed, and pro- perceive the split-up of Martin and Lewis in sons that wouldn't be the truth. You want duced by Lewis. Innovatively equipped I 956 as a permanent gag on the Big Mouth, the truth? I wasn't very good and they with individual lighting and sound systems, an impression not lost on this man who dumped me. The first thing they did was, each room could handle filming without spent the better part of his young life culti- JERRY LEWIS GETS SEVENTY-FIVE-MILLION-C)( " the usual breakdown delays adjunct to vating insecurities. LAR CONTRACT. There was such exploit; moving from set to set. "After our last performance together, I tion, for six months you heard, 'Jerry Levi.is Those who worked with Lewis found had no idea what I would be doing the live-two hours Saturday night,' and I kept that the lovable, juvenile underdog in specs next day or the day after that. There was saying to my PR people, 'We're gonna kill who delighted audiences was an imperious, only a foreboding sense of failure, of my ourselves. We can't live up to what they're whimsically brutal tyrant who wrangled life emptying away and becoming an ab- doing.' Well, with the kind of deal they with directors and gave producers ulcers. solute blank." made, they wanna be sure, so every ten He was notorious for putting a match to In fact, Jerry got even bigger-for a time. fucking seconds on ABC, 'Jerry Lewis material submitted by his writers (includ- Without a straight man he became his own Is Coming.' By the time it came, there ing Bud Yorkin and Norman Lear) if he best-of, free to shape and burnish the comic was no way you could do anything to rims thought it wasn't funny enough. But the persona he brought to the duet-the loud- above that exploitation. What we had \is sheer breadth of the Martin-Lewis appeal mouthed, flinching klutz with the domino- mediocrity." allowed them-especially Jerry-to step theory hex on his good intentions. In the What appears to have torpedoed the on a lot of toes. years that followed, critics bludgeoned show, more than all the misguided hype or When they were kings of the mountain, him; moviegoers made him rich. even the quality of what went on the air, the 901i1 party set fought over them the "I don't care about critical acclaim," he was the will of an uncompromising, con- way they do for the best caterers now. If told Newsweek. "I could do the damnedest tentious professional who, throughout his you were lucky enough to get Martin and satire on Noel Coward you ever saw, and career, demanded the kind of control that is Lewis to crash your bash, you could serve you critics would love it. But then I'd have rarely surrendered peacefully. Tbe jerry cocktail weenies and Kool-Aid under a pup an audience of only two hundred fifty crit- Lewis Show crashed and burned after a sc- tent and still need a SWAT team to get ev- ics, and I'd have lost the audience of for- ries of heated skirmishes between Lewi. eryone to go home. The formula was as ty million people I have now. So I don't and the network over guest selection static as it was beloved: Jerry as the phony listen to the critics. I listen to the milkman format, on-the-air language, spontaneity, idiot, the nihilistic geek with the whooping- I bump into on my way to work in the and Jerry's then-notorious social commen- crane walk, and Dean as the straight man, morning because he represents the two taries. Jerry getting in someone's face the comically bedeviled crooner. hundred thousand other milkmen, and if again; Jerry pressing the bet. It's safe to say "Let's face it," says Jerry. "Dean was the he says he didn't like something in my last that a great many of Lewis's setbacks can best, probably the greatest straight man movie, I make damned sure to change it be traced to his lifelong adherence to brink- that has ever lived. Moreover, he was as the next time." manship. Like the schoolyard kid who funny as I ever was, and the audience never By the early Sixties, Lewis wrote, direct- refuses to back down, Jerry took a heap of knew it. He never got his fair share, never ed, and starred in his own box-office hits pounding before the line between convic-- Vacguf t FEBRUARY 1991 102.