COMPASSION PRACTICE (FOUR IMMEASURABLES)

SESSION 2: Compassion COURSE STRUCTURE

Schedule 1. Mon Nov 23 – Loving-kindness (& dealing with attachment) 2. Wed Nov 25 – Compassion (& dealing with anger) 3. Wed Nov 02 – Empathetic joy & equanimity 4. Mon Dec 07 – Exchanging self with others 5. Wed Dec 09 – Tong-len (giving & taking)

Recommended reading • Four Immeasurables – Alan Wallace • with an Attitude – Alan Wallace MEDITATION

Settling body, speech & mind SESSION 2: COMPASSION

1. Review 2. Compassion 3. Meditation – compassion 4. Anger 5. Meditation – dealing with anger 6. Dispelling misconceptions 7. Cognitive fusion 8. Q&A 9. Dedication 1. REVIEW

Two wings of practice Theravada () Mahayana (Sanskrit) 1. Prajna (wisdom) – vipashyana 3 marks of existence emptiness 2. Upaya (method) – compassion 4 immeasurables bodhicitta

Four Immeasurables 1. Loving-kindness (maitri) “May all living beings have happiness & it’s causes.” 2. Compassion (karuna) “May they be free of suffering & it’s causes.” 3. Empathetic joy (mudita) “May they never be separated from the happiness that is free from suffering.” 4. Equanimity (upeksha) “May they abide in equanimity, free of attachment & aversion to those near & far.” 1. REVIEW

Compassion training • Four Immeasurables (foundation) 1. Loving-kindness Session 1 2. Compassion Session 2 3. Empathetic joy Session 3 4. Equanimity Session 3 • Exchanging self with others Session 4 (building on the foundation) • Tong-len (giving & taking) Session 5

• Dealing with attachment Session 1 • Dealing with anger Session 2

• Integrating into daily life Session 5 1. REVIEW

Loving-kindness (Sanskrit: maitri; Pali: metta) • the wish/aspiration for ourselves & others to have happiness & it’s causes What is happiness? • 2 types of happiness – pleasure & genuine happiness (inner well-being)

What are the causes of genuine happiness? • Theravada traditions (Pali) – Noble Eight Fold Path • Mahayana traditions (Sanskrit) – Six Perfections

Three higher trainings 1. Ethics (shila) 2. Concentration (samadhi) 3. Wisdom (prajna) 1. REVIEW

How to cultivate those causes 1. Ethics (shila) – avoiding harmful behaviour 2. Concentration (samadhi) – shamatha practice 3. Wisdom (prajna) – vipashyana practice (3 marks of existence, emptiness)

Stages of cultivation of loving-kindness • self • friends • strangers • enemies • all living beings (immeasurable loving-kindness) 1. REVIEW

Attachment (Sanskrit: ragah; Pali: lobha) • definition of attachment: a mental factor that sees its object as attractive, exaggerates the object’s attractiveness and thus wishes to possess and hold it • (attachment & detachment) vs non-attachment • dispelling misconceptions – need attachment to enjoy things, to have a relationship, to be creative Dealing with attachment 1. clear understanding of attachment (what it is & how it leads to suffering) 2. cultivating view of genuine happiness (preliminaries) 3. using mindfulness (shamatha) • attachment will simply dissipate by itself (not need to fight with it) 4. applying antidotes – eg. impermanence & emptiness (vipashyana) 2. COMPASSION

“Those desiring to escape from suffering hasten right toward their own misery. And with the very desire for happiness, out of delusion they destroy their own well-being as if it were the enemy.” Shantideva (8C)

Compassion (Sanskrit & Pali: karuna) • the wish/aspiration for ourselves & others to be free of suffering & it’s causes • not an emotion (empathy is the emotion that precedes compassion) • we already have a desire to be free of suffering however it is often misdirected • desiring to escape suffering we hasten right toward our own misery • to cultivate compassion we need to know: • 1. What is suffering?, 2. What are the causes of suffering? and 3. How to eliminate those causes? • otherwise compassion is just words with no meaning 2. COMPASSION

1. What is suffering? • normally understand it to mean unpleasant/painful physical or mental experiences • original Sanskrit term: duhkha (Pali: dukkha) • etymology: duh – bad; kha – space/hole (analogy of cart axel)

Three types of duhkha 1. Suffering (unpleasant) – most obvious 2. Change (pleasant) – not so obvious (normally identify as happiness) 3. All pervasive (potential for suffering to arise) – much less obvious • deepest level of compassion (the wish to be free of this ‘unsatisfactory’ state) 2. COMPASSION

2. What are the causes of suffering? mental afflictions (the ) 1. Ignorance (avidya) – distorted view of reality 2. Attachment (ragah) – last session 3. Aversion () – this session (anger)

Four distorted views 1. Changing as unchanging 2. Pleasure as happiness 3. No self as self 4. Dependent as independent 2. COMPASSION

3. How to eliminate the causes of suffering “By extinguishing actions and mental afflictions, there is liberation. Actions and mental afflictions arise from misconceptions. And misconceptions arise from elaborations. Elaborations will cease through cultivating emptiness.” Nagarjuna (2C) elaborations – ignorance (grasping to independent existence)

Stages of cultivation of compassion 1. Friends 2. Strangers 3. Enemies 4. All living beings (Immeasurable compassion) One more stage at the beginning: compassion toward oneself 3. MEDITATION

Compassion (self, friend, stranger, enemy) 3. MEDITATION

Tips for the practice • start with oneself (especially if suffering from low self-esteem) • focus both on individuals & groups • how to cultivate for difficult people? avoid cognitive fusion • ‘I find visualization difficult’ (clear visualization not most important aspect) • alternative method – just repeating mental aspiration (not using visualization)

Obstacles to compassion • far enemy: cruelty –> dealing with anger • near enemy: despair –> next session (empathetic joy) • near enemy: pity –> session 4 (exchanging self with others) 4. ANGER

Anger (Sanskrit: pratigha; Pali: patigha) • anger is a mental affliction (klesha) • klesha – mental factors which cause the mind to become disturbed (26, 6, 3) • definition of anger: a mental factor that sees its object as unattractive, exaggerates the object’s unattractiveness and thus wishes to harm the object • where does anger come from? • it comes from our distorted view of reality • ie. objects of our anger seem to be the source of our suffering • anger is to be fully eliminated (since it is a mental affliction) • use of the word anger in psychology (social injustice example) • here – anger includes intention to harm (intention vs emotion) 4. ANGER

Dealing with anger 1. clear understanding of anger • what it is and how it leads to suffering (reflecting on own past experiences) 2. view of genuine happiness (preliminaries) 3. using mindfulness (shamatha) • simply observing anger as it arises (window of opportunity) • thus not identifying with it, has no power over us and also nothing feeding it • anger will simply dissipate by itself (not need to fight with it) 4. applying antidotes (vipashyana) • patience (undisturbed mind) • emptiness (seeing unattractiveness as created by our mind) Practicing these methods in meditation and then applying them in daily life. 5. MEDITATION

Dealing with anger 6. DISPELLING MISCONCEPTIONS

1. “I need anger to deal with difficult situations” • anger exaggerates/distorts –> over-reacting/inappropriate response • solution: patience instead of anger 2. “If I practice patience people will walk all over me” • patience is not a behaviour, it’s a mental attitude • definition of patience: an undisturbed mind in the face of a difficult situation 3. “I won’t be able to be forceful when necessary if I can’t use anger” • use compassion 4. “Compassion is a sign of weakness” • anger is a sign of weakness (resorting to dominating people in difficult situations) • compassion is a sign of strength (trying to help rather than harm) 7. COGNITIVE FUSION

Why do we get angry with others who behave badly?

Correct perspective Cognitive fusion (false/invalid perspective) person doing bad action bad person compassion address reject person accept bad behaviour

• compassion more easy • compassion becomes very difficult • balanced view of person • fixed biased view of the person • leads to co-operation • leads to conflict (ie. us vs them) • evaluating the behaviour • judging the person 7. COGNITIVE FUSION

Why is there so much low self-esteem & self-hatred?

Correct perspective Cognitive fusion (false/invalid perspective)

I did bad action I’m a bad person accept regret reject guilt

• evaluating our behaviour • judging/criticising ourselves • forgiveness/compassion • condemnation/hatred • good self-esteem (balanced view) • low self-esteem (fixed biased view) • regret/addressing behaviour • guilt/not addressing behaviour 7. COGNITIVE FUSION

What is the solution to low self-esteem & self-hatred? • simply reinforce that “I’m a good person”? • danger of cognitive fusion 1. ego trip, not acknowledging any bad behaviour, us vs them 2. doesn’t seem possible so “I must really be a bad person” • answer: avoid cognitive fusion • ie. avoid wrongly identifying ourselves with our bad behaviour • good-self esteem and at the same time address our bad behaviour

Wrong identification • we are not our thoughts, emotions, memories, habits, behaviour, personality, body, mind • identification leads to mental afflictions and suffering 8. Q&A 9. DEDICATION SHANTIDEVA (BODHISATTVACHARYAVATARA)

May all beings everywhere May the naked find clothing Plagued by sufferings of body and mind, The hungry find food; Obtain an ocean of happiness and joy May the thirsty find water By virtue of my merits. And delicious drinks.

May no living creature suffer, May the poor find wealth, Commit evil or ever fall ill. Those weak with sorrow find joy; May no one be afraid or belittled, May the forlorn find hope, With a mind weighed down by depression. Constant happiness and prosperity.

May the blind see forms May there be timely rains And the deaf hear sounds. And bountiful harvests; May those whose bodies are worn with toil May all medicines be effective Be restored on finding repose. And wholesome prayers bear fruit. 9. DEDICATION SHANTIDEVA (BODHISATTVACHARYAVATARA)

May all who are sick and ill Quickly be freed from their ailments. Whatever diseases there are in the world, May they never occur again.

May the frightened cease to be afraid And those bound be freed; May the powerless find power And may people think of benefiting each other.

For as long as space remains, For as long as sentient beings remain, Until then may I too remain To dispel the miseries of the world. COMPASSION PRACTICE (FOUR IMMEASURABLES)

NEXT SESSION: Wed Dec 02 SESSION 3: Empathetic Joy & Equanimity