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Ref lections Metamorphosis ne of the most entrancing of changes, snaps the absorption in the images, for carefully fortified by nature, is the there cannot be a movie without a leading creationO of a butterfly. An ugly stout character, and this disrupts the show. The caterpillar, builds a cocoon and transforms mind comes out of its absorption and it’s life energies, little by little, in an becomes conscious of itself. Control unimaginable way, into one of the most becomes possible. Atma vichar or self- beautiful creatures on our planet. As the analysis thus serves as a key to genuine myriad-coloured, brightly-winged, delicate transformation. butterfly takes wings and soars towards In human beings, the self-awareness the blue sky, one cannot but wonder— has come full circle and hence holds the whence this transformation? potential to manifest itself fully. That is All the lessons that God intended to why the sense of ‘I’, the fringe of our true teach us are enshrouded in nature around Being, is so strong. With a little analysis us. If we are willing to learn, there are we can see that the sense of ‘I’ has two lessons in leaves and messages in the dew levels. One is the ‘thinkable’ portion. It is that glistens on them. Learning is usually the epithets, appellations and labels metamorphosing. A very interesting part we have collected over time. It forms the of learning is questioning oneself. We, crust of our personality. More fundamental humans, have a unique way of deluding to this, is the feel of existence, without ourselves with a permanent sense of thought. Now, here we have an interesting identity; until we question the ‘I’ in all its find. We do remain over, even when we bareness. When we truly do this, we are are not thinking. When scrutinized, this is in for a real shock! a state of simple, intense self-awareness. Human identity is a defining feature It is completely independent of our mental of the human experience. No other cogitation. It is also independent of effort. creature has a sense of ‘I’ or self as strong No process of knowledge is involved in it. as we do. Man values his relationships, his In fact it is more ‘felt’ when the mind is affections and possessions because of their absolutely non-functional, as for instance, connections to his ‘I’. But how true is the during periods of tranquility, in the still ‘I’? A cursory look at the mind, which hours of dawn and dusk. It steals upon us radiates the sense of being, reveals unawares. The refreshing touch of no- something of the nature of a movie show. thought and the underlying, flowing, The movie is part documentary (based on unbroken awareness mesmerizes us memory), part drama (based on desire), occasionally. This experience is fairly with a sprinkling of fantasy, comedy and common in young people. Meditation is an fiction, all collaged together by the ego attempt to consciously and categorically which poses as the leading actor. And so usher in this state and then intensify it. It is we sport many identities and remain plunging into one’s own depths; bringing absorbed in our images and ego-ties. one’s whole being into full awareness. It Questioning the ego, peering into its nature, can be achieved by training attention, 6 Samvit September 2016 which is nothing but a spark of precedes work, and awareness precedes consciousness, arising at will, and illumining thought. The content and intensity of this the objects it falls upon. This makes awareness renders power to the thought meditation a cutting-edge spiritual and these energized thoughts inspire technology to plumb into the depths of our actions. Consecration, if real and life-long, personality structure. Transformation is has to stand on the bedrock of always transformation of ‘I’. Neither authenticity. It is not just the polishing of change of place, nor method, nor religion the exterior, expressed in the majesty of actually transforms, unless our sense of ‘I’ our works and the fineness of our words. has changed. Every brick of the personality structure – In 1898, Nivedita accompanied from the inner awareness to its subtle Vivekananda to Almora. She had left a percolation in daily action – is to be comfortable life and an illustrious career, trained. Thus discipline, de-conditioning in other words snapped the ties of ‘I’, to and the essential rewiring are inevitable. realize the truths that her Master spoke Vivekananda slashed down all personal of. In his wonderful personality she saw a affection, ‘only in order to bestow the selflessness and purity that were impersonal vision in its place’. Slowly, astounding. Initially she did not know what Nivedita found that her self-identity to make of it. Once shorn of the little self, metamorphosed into selfless being. And the truth behind the ‘I’ resurrects itself. from such natural renunciation came the When one touches the magnificent reality ability to work in conjunction with the of one’s true Being, the murky ego which divine will. is always unsure of itself, surrenders and Magnificent, vast objects naturally submits, or rather acknowledges it’s non- still the mind and uproot the little ego. The existence. This is the basis of all true loftiness of the Himalayan peaks had been ‘selflessness’, for the Self reigns over the the haven of Vedic seers and sages. Nature ego. And hence a spiritual person radiates has a shrine-like quality and the ambience a dignity that redefines the conventional generated by her natural vibes can be attitude of respect. Nivedita saw this clearly felt by anyone who lives in close clearly in the firm character of her great proximity with her. One evening in the Guru Vivekananda. She saw how indeed pristine precincts of the Himalayan peaks, a true sannyasin stands at the head of the Nivedita felt an awakening within. She Vedas. Her worship of the person now penned it down, “Long, long ago Sri transmuted into selfless dedication to his Ramakrishna had told his disciples that the cause. day would come when his beloved Naren Vivekananda could see the past and would manifest his great gift of bestowing future of his disciple and acknowledged knowledge with a touch. That evening at the intensity of her aspiration. But the Almora, I proved the truth of his prophecy. realization demanded neither mere change For alone in meditation I found myself of place nor exchange of objects, but a gazing deep into an infinite good, to the transformation, a metamorphosis. And recognition of which no egoistic reasoning transformation is always in the ‘I’. We had led me….” Her vision cleared, she judge people by their works, but thought took note, “I am learning…that there is a September 2016Reflections 7 certain definite quality which may be called surprised at what they saw. Many a time spirituality…that nothing that I have ever they found Nivedita taking a mat and called nobility or unselfishness was kissing it over and over again, and then anything but the feeblest and most sordid dusting it with great care, before spreading of qualities compared to the fierce light of it on the floor. Mother would sit on it and real selflessness. It is strange that it has so the extreme care! ‘I never saw a face taken so long to make me see these so full of love’ was Nivedita’s acute elementary truths clearly.” The two- discernment of Mother. She saw in Mother hundred year old glorious Deodar tree what everyone saw, but which none could standing as a silent sentinel at the Oakley fully articulate. A commingling of womanly house in Almora, to this day, bears virtue, immaculate purity and incredible testimony to the vibrant metamorphosis love radiated from those eyes, leaving no of Margaret Noble into Sister Nivedita. A doubt that Mother was the visible life of complete dedication is the result of embodiment of divine motherhood. The a transcendental touch somewhere in the calmness and consistency of her soul. Stepping into a higher state of demeanour revealed the bright light of Self- awareness brought its own vision, its own knowledge. As one sees the glint of luminosity and understanding. Meditation familiarity through self-recognition in one’s now became a habit with Nivedita. And image seen in a mirror, a Self-realized in its depths, she found the rationale of person percieves the same glint in every her dedication. The ‘fierce light of real eye. Mother’s eyes radiated this sense of selflessness’ was nothing but the calm familiarity and unity and hence her resignation of the ego to the Self. When personality compelled love and devotion. the ego is no longer active in posing and For the first time Nivedita pretence, the Self is able to manifest itself. encountered the sheer glory of the Indian When the Self is able to manifest, life culture first-hand. She saw the might and becomes one of determined higher reach of a culture that placed spirit above purpose – a saga of consecration, a matter, service above self, purity above chronicle of devotion. Nivedita’s pleasure. The result was that she became personality was suffused with a divine a life-long advocate of Indian cultural glow. values and an undeclared amabassador of Having lost itself, the ego made way the underlying spiritual heritage. She saw for the integration of the highest values of to her amazement that Mother’s lofty life life. The silence of the East and the energy dismissed, without regret, many of the that characterized the West conjoined in modalities that characterize the modern Nivedita’s frame.