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ASRXXX10.1177/0003122419874843American Sociological ReviewSweet research-article8748432019

American Sociological Review 2019, Vol. 84(5) 851­–875 The of © American Sociological Association 2019 https://doi.org/10.1177/0003122419874843DOI: 10.1177/0003122419874843 journals.sagepub.com/home/asr

Paige L. Sweeta

Abstract Gaslighting—a type of psychological aimed at making victims seem or feel “crazy,” creating a “surreal” interpersonal environment—has captured public . Despite the of the term, sociologists have ignored gaslighting, leaving it to be theorized by psychologists. However, this article argues that gaslighting is primarily a sociological rather than a psychological phenomenon. Gaslighting should be understood as rooted in social inequalities, including , and executed in power-laden intimate relationships. The theory developed here argues that gaslighting is consequential when perpetrators mobilize gender- based and structural and institutional inequalities against victims to manipulate their realities. Using domestic as a strategic case study to identify the mechanisms via which gaslighting operates, I reveal how abusers mobilize gendered stereotypes; structural related to race, nationality, and sexuality; and institutional inequalities against victims to erode their realities. These tactics are gendered in that they rely on the association of femininity with irrationality. Gaslighting offers an opportunity for sociologists to theorize under-recognized, gendered forms of power and their mobilization in interpersonal relationships.

Keywords gaslighting, , gender, sexuality, intersectionality

George Cukor’s 1944 film Gaslight1 tells the how psychological manipulation dominates the story of Paula () and her new “post-truth” political era. ’s Ariel Gregory (Charles Boyer), who sets Leve wrote an article in 2017 titled, “Trump is about the task of isolating her and making her Gaslighting America.” Psychotherapist Steph- believe she is insane. His eponymous tactic is anie Sarkis, whose popular book Gaslighting to dim and brighten the gaslights and then came out in 2018, makes a similar argument. insist she is imagining it. Gregory aims to Gaslighting was even made an official part of undermine Paula’s sense of self and everyday criminal domestic violence law in the United life, to confuse and distort her reality such Kingdom in 2015, and more than 300 people that she must accept his imposed reality in have since been charged with the offense place of her own. (Mikhailova 2018). Today, gaslighting is an increasingly ubiqui- Despite its growing recognition as an abu- tous term used to describe the -manipulating sive power tactic, sociologists have ignored strategies of abusive people, in both politics and interpersonal relationships. Dozens of aHarvard University online checklists instruct readers on the “warn- ing signs” of gaslighting in their intimate rela- Corresponding Author: Paige L. Sweet, Harvard University, 1730 tionships. A second edition of Robin Stern’s Cambridge Street, CGIS S410, Cambridge, MA bestselling 2007 book The Gaslight Effect was 02138 released in 2018, and the new version considers Email: [email protected] 852 American Sociological Review 84(5) gaslighting, leaving it for psychologists to women do not typically have the cultural, eco- study. This, I argue, is a mistake. Gaslighting nomic, and political capital necessary to gas- is fundamentally a social phenomenon. Engag- light men—gaslighting is therefore a gendered ing in abusive mental manipulation certainly phenomenon. In fact, whether or not it is exer- involves psychological dynamics, but scholars cised by a male-bodied person against a female- have thus far disregarded the social character- bodied person, gaslighting tactics construct istics that actually give gaslighting its power. victims in terms of feminized irrationality. Specifically, gaslighting is effective when it is Recent survey data suggest that gaslight- rooted in social inequalities, especially gender ing is common in domestic violence situa- and sexuality, and executed in power-laden tions, preventing women from accessing intimate relationships. When perpetrators resources (Warshaw et al. 2014). As my anal- mobilize gender-based stereotypes, structural ysis shows, gaslighting can amplify the dan- inequalities, and institutional vulnerabilities gers already present in abused women’s lives. against victims with whom they are in an inti- Gaslighting can also prevent domestic vio- mate relationship, gaslighting becomes not lence victims from accessing institutional only effective, but devastating. resources that would help them escape the This article develops a sociological theory abuse. Indeed, the very institutions set up to of gaslighting using in-depth analysis of life help victims can become part of the gaslight- story interviews with women attending ing process. Gaslighting should be of domestic violence support groups. I define to sociologists, then, because domestic vio- gaslighting as a set of attempts to create a lence is widespread and gaslighting is a core “surreal” (Ferraro 2006) social environment feature of intimate abuse. by making the other in an intimate relation- Yet, the importance of gaslighting for soci- ship seem or feel “crazy.” I argue that gas- ologists extends well beyond the case of lighting tactics become consequential when domestic violence: first, gaslighting occurs in abusers mobilize macro-level inequalities other types of interpersonal relationships, cre- related to gender, sexuality, race, nationality, ating and exacerbating power imbalances; and class against an intimate other. By conse- second, accepting purely psychological quential, I mean that such tactics damage approaches to gaslighting risks the prolifera- victims’ sense of reality, , mobility, tion of context-free analyses; and finally, gas- identity, and social supports. lighting exposes how the association of Unlike psychological approaches to gas- women with irrationality exacerbates existing lighting, a sociological theory of gaslighting gender and sexual inequalities. A theory of must show how macro-level social inequali- gaslighting therefore offers an opportunity for ties are transformed into micro-level strate- sociologists to identify and analyze under- gies of abuse. Decades of research reveal that recognized, gendered forms of power and no form of abuse can be extracted from social their mobilization in interpersonal relation- context: anyone can use manipulative tactics ships across a range of situations. against anyone else, but such actions only transform victims’ lives—becoming abusive (Stark 2010)—when they are embedded in Toward A Sociological relations of power. The theoretical framework Theory of Gaslighting offered here has two layers. Psychological Accounts of First, gaslighting works when deployed in Gaslighting power-unequal intimate relationships, creating an environment of “surreality.” Second, gas- Despite the recent journalistic use of gaslight- lighting works when perpetrators mobilize ing to name Trump’s political strategy, gas- gender-based stereotypes, intersecting inequali- lighting is traditionally understood as an ties, and institutional vulnerabilities against interpersonal, psychological dynamic. In fact, victims. This second point is critical because psychotherapists popularized the term. Sweet 853

Barton and Whitehead are to have attempt to determine the boundaries of vic- coined “gaslighting” in a 1969 Lancet paper tims’ realities. Johnson (2008:9) writes, “It’s that analyzed involuntary hospitalization as a her crazy . . . that requires him to form of abuse.2 The term then appeared a control her . . . she’s [really] the abusive part- handful of times in the psychotherapeutic lit- ner. She’s so out of touch with reality that erature during the 1970s and 1980s (Calef maybe she should get some help.” Dobash and and Weinshel 1981; Gass and Nichols 1988; Dobash’s (1979:105) landmark study refer- Smith and Sinanan 1972). However, “gas- ences abusers’ consistent construction of lighting” seems to have fallen out of use until women as “exaggerating” and making up the psychotherapist Robin Stern popularized it in violence; abusers in their study even invented her 2007 book, which holds that gaslighting is tales of and tried to con- a phenomenon of “mutual participation” vince their wives the stories were true. Accord- between “gaslighter” (perpetrator) and “gas- ing to Richie (2012:43), these manipulations lightee” (victim). She writes, “The first step is create a “hostile social environment” that feels to become aware of your own role in gaslight- disorienting. In short, although IPV scholars ing, the ways in which your own behavior, do not theorize these “crazy-making” tactics , and fantasies may be leading you to as a specific phenomenon, they clearly recog- idealize your gaslighter and seek his approval” nize them as endemic to abuse. (Stern [2007] 2018:xxvii). This overview indicates that gaslighting is Although Stern claims that gaslighting is ubiquitous but under-theorized as a distinct gender-neutral, nearly all her case studies phenomenon in IPV research. The IPV litera- involve a heterosexual male partner as gas- ture overwhelmingly situates “crazy-making” lighter and a woman as gaslightee. Stern tactics within the broader context of “intimate places responsibility on the “gaslightee” to ” (Johnson 2006, 2008),3 “coercive fix or get out of the relationship. Psychologi- control” (Stark 2007), and psychological cal uses of gaslighting like Stern’s highlight abuse.4 Physical violence is part of establish- the importance of intimate relationships in ing control, scholars note, but so are tactics gaslighting, but they ignore the gender-based such as emotional abuse, , and structural conditions that make gaslighting (Anderson 2008, 2010; Dutton, possible, and they fail to locate gaslighting as Goodman, and Bennett 1999; Giordano et al. a common feature of domestic violence. 2016; Hardesty et al. 2015; Johnson, Leone, and Xu 2014; Kimmel 2002; Myhill 2015; Reed et al. 2010; Stark and Hester 2019; IPV Literature and Allusions to Tanha et al. 2010). exerts Gaslighting control by micro-regulating victims’ everyday In contrast, the intimate partner violence (IPV) lives, self-concepts, and sense of reality literature does not regularly use the term “gas- (Hardesty et al. 2015; Murphy and Hoover lighting,” yet it offers extensive evidence that 1999; Myhill 2017; Piipsa 2002). IPV research gaslighting is gendered and is common in further shows that psychological control tac- abusive relationships. Gaslighting emerges as tics are used more commonly and effectively a sense of “surreality,” , and distor- by men against women (Hester et al. 2017; tion systematically experienced by victims. Kelly and Westmarland 2016; Myhill 2015; For example, Ferraro (2006:73) describes Tanha et al. 2010),5 and that in the long term, what she calls “surreality,” showing how psychological abuse affects victims more neg- abusers “ tales” that violate victims’ sense atively than does (Anderson of reality, distorting their perceptions of every- 2009; Dutton and Goodman 2005; Ferraro thing from minor details of everyday life to 2006; Hester et al. 2017; Murphy and Hoover their partners’ entire biographies. Williamson 1999; O’Leary 1999; Strauchler et al. 2004). (2010:1418) describes domestic violence as However, gaslighting is not yet understood “unreality,” because abusers consistently as distinct from other types of psychological 854 American Sociological Review 84(5) abuse, such as humiliation. This is a signifi- 2005; Ross 2012). In other words, , cant oversight, as there is growing consensus , and isolation are gendered out- that it is necessary to parse types of abuse and comes (Anderson 2009; Dutton and Good- their socio-structural conditions (Myhill man 2005; Myhill 2015). 2015; Stark 2010). As Johnson (2008:3) The IPV literature provides preliminary writes, researchers should “take apart” the evidence that gaslighting is a common feature dynamics of abuse to understand the “web” of controlling and coercive relationships, but that entraps women. As my data suggest, it has not examined this specific style of psy- when abusers successfully make victims feel chological abuse or theorized its social condi- “crazy,” victims become especially vulnera- tions of possibility. We must therefore extend ble to and less likely to beyond the IPV literature to develop a socio- rely on institutional supports. As such, I argue logical theory of gaslighting. After all, gas- that we need to parse “gaslighting” as a spe- lighting is not only found in cases of domestic cific type of psychological abuse in order to violence: gaslighting has captured public understand the social dynamics that make attention because it occurs in various kinds of gaslighting effective, as well as the conse- relationships and because it refers to gen- quences it engenders. dered cultural dynamics. The best quantitative data available pro- vide evidence that gaslighting is a startlingly Gender Stereotypes and Intimate common feature of domestic violence. A sur- Relationships vey conducted by the National Domestic Vio- lence Hotline (NDVH) in 2014 asked 2,500 Understanding gaslighting sociologically hotline callers about their experiences of coer- requires placing this phenomenon in its cul- cion (Warshaw et al. 2014). Respondents were tural, structural, and institutional contexts. adult women who had experienced domestic Gender inequality is a condition of possibility violence, called the hotline, and agreed to for gaslighting: it deprives women of the participate in the survey. In response to the social power that would allow them to define question, “Do you think your partner or ex- men’s realities in this way (Anderson 2010; partner has ever deliberately done things to Richie 1996; Stark 2007).6 This is not to say make you feel like you are going crazy or los- men never experience abuse or abusive tac- ing your mind,” 73.8 percent answered posi- tics, but rather that gender inequality makes tively. And in response to the question, “Has women more likely to be victimized than men your partner or ex-partner ever threatened to (U.S. Department of Justice 2016). report to authorities that you are ‘crazy’ to Decades of social scientific research indi- keep you from getting something you want or cate that all forms of abuse between adults are need,” just over 50 percent of callers answered more commonly used by men against women “yes.” The descriptive results of this survey (CDC 2015; Kimmel 2002). In this sense, are staggering: nearly three-quarters of this theorizing intimate violence requires attention sample of victims experienced gaslighting, to gender as structure, in addition to gender as and over half identified gaslighting as an an -level variable (Anderson 2005; obstacle to accessing support. Connell 1987; Martin 2004; Risman 2004). These data provide justification for the Gendered and sexual stereotypes, structural present study, but these methods fall short exclusions, and institutional because they fail to help us understand abu- create the conditions for violence (Anderson sive acts by their ability to coerce (Dutton and 2005; Armstrong, Gleckman-Krut, and John- Goodman 2005). This failure is important son 2018; Richie 2012; Saguy 2003; Stark because although women may use abusive 2007). Even when violence is not used by a tactics against male partners, men are less male-bodied person against a female-bodied likely to be afraid of women and less likely to person, scholars have shown that perpetrators change their behavior in response (Anderson feminize victims in order to execute intimate Sweet 855 forms of violence against them (Connell 1995; have become less rigid (Adams and Bettis Kimmel 2004; Pascoe 2011). But how does 2003; Randles 2018). Yet, a central paradox gender matter for gaslighting specifically? in the sociology of gender is that although Answering this question requires paying women as a group have gained mobility, gen- attention to what gaslighting does: it system- der inequality in intimate relationships per- atically constructs victims as “crazy” and sists (England 2010; Ridgeway and Correll destabilizes their realities. The ability to lev- 2004; Scarborough and Risman 2017; Scar- erage an accusation of “crazy” is gendered. borough, Sin, and Risman 2019). Sociologists The idea that women are overly emotional, have found that romantic relationships are the irrational, and not in control of their arena in which traditional gender has a long history. Labeling women “crazy” is are upheld most strongly (Dalessandro and a key feature of the gender system, especially Wilkins 2017; England 2010; Lamont 2014). via institutions such as medicine and law The literature on the “stalled” gender revolu- (Barker 2009; Douglas 2012; Ehrenreich and tion thus suggests that intimate relationships English 1973; Figert 1996; Smart 1989). are precisely the place to look for the ongoing Female victims of violence have long been animation of traditional ideologies that cast portrayed as irrational in court and other legal women as emotionally untethered. settings, labeled with conditions such as “bat- Indeed, evidence from non-abusive hetero- tered women’s syndrome” (Ferraro 2003; Roth- sexual relationships indicates that women are enberg 2002). Schur (1984) argues that women’s regularly constructed as irrational and overly behavior is presumed to lack reason, casting emotional. Young people express a for femininity itself as deviant. Metzl (2003) shows gender equality in romantic relationships, but how women represent lack of reason and ration- stereotypes persist about men as autonomous ality in medical history. Kempner (2014) finds and in control versus emotionally unstable that the medical construction of women as hys- and dependent women (Dalessandro and terical continues to allow experts to treat wom- Wilkins 2017; Ezzel 2012; Lamont 2014). en’s as illegitimate. The history of the Women report fear of seeming excessively psy- sciences also reflects this association of emotional in intimate relationships with men, femininity with irrationality and childishness and they experience a lack of power over the (Shields 2007). As Littlejohn (2013:847) writes, trajectory of those relationships as a result “Men have historically been seen as rational (Lamont 2014). Traditional gender ideolo- beings with the ability to control their emotions, gies, especially those around , but women’s has been seen as ‘danger- are thus “remarkably resilient” in romantic ously unregulated.’” relationships (Lamont 2014:190). McKim (2008:309) finds that in What we know about the micro-dynamics programs, women’s selves are constructed as of abusive heterosexual relationships also “profoundly deficient and irrational” com- provides evidence for the persistent associa- pared to men’s. Women are thought to be tion of femininity with irrationality. Micro- overly emotional in various spheres of social regulations of feminine performance (e.g., life, including the workplace (Blum and clothing) are key to coercive control (Ander- Stracuzzi 2004; Connell 1995; Martin 2003). son 2009). Abusers regulate women’s bodies Lack of intellectual control is also racialized by controlling access to birth control and and classed: claims to rational, conscious abortion (Barber et al. 2018; Miller et al. emotions are therefore claims to status and 2010). Research with male perpetrators fur- power (Shields 2007). ther shows that abusive men hold traditional Still, the idea that women lack rationality gender role ideologies (Anderson and Umber- may seem like an outdated trope. After all, son 2001; Yamawaki, Ostenson, and Brown women in the have made sig- 2009) and tend to construct their female part- nificant gains in education and labor market ners as unreasonable (Schrock, McCabe, and participation, and gender role stereotypes Vaccaro 2017). 856 American Sociological Review 84(5)

Anderson and Umberson (2001) find that harm. Gendered and racialized patterns of male perpetrators describe their partners as discrimination and exclusion are institutional- ridiculous, overwrought, and silly. Women in ized (Armstrong, Hamilton, and Sweeney abusive relationships report being encouraged 2006; Brush 2011; Desmond and Valdez by their abusers to think of themselves as “stu- 2012; McLaughlin, Uggen, and Blackstone pid” and “crazy” (Enander 2010). ­Williamson 2012); “gender is present in the processes, (2010) recounts the story of an abuser who practices, images and ideologies, and distri- broke his ’s arm on their honeymoon and butions of power” in all kinds of institutions then told friends and that she was (Acker 1992:567). Universities are gendered walking drunkenly in high heels when she fell institutions allowing for “party ” to occur and injured herself. Feminine performance (Armstrong et al. 2006). High schools rein- (clothing) and carelessness (drinking) became force ideologies allowing masculinity to be his weapons as he successfully drew on the accomplished via the denigration of feminin- association of femininity with irrationality to ity (Pascoe 2011). Gendered stereotypes are “flip” the story. The dynamics of abuse func- built into penal institutions, law, medicine, tion, at least in part, through ideologies that and the workplace, marking masculinity as associate femininity with irrationality. rational and femininity as its opposite (Britton Thus, gender stereotypes, in addition to 1997; Henriksen 2017). Gender-based vulner- material gender inequalities, must be made abilities and patterns of discrimination central to any understanding of gaslighting. become both naturalized and stalwart in insti- Research suggests intimate relationships are an tutions. This calls for analyzing how women’s especially salient place in which to find enact- lack of credibility in powerful institutions is ments of traditional gender stereotypes, espe- mobilized in gaslighting dynamics. cially around women’s excessive emotionality. In summary, gender stereotypes, intersect- But these stereotypes are not mobilized in iso- ing inequalities, and institutional discrimina- lation from other social factors. I turn to the tion create unequal conditions in intimate literature on intersecting forms of structural relationships. The association of femininity and institutional inequality to build toward a with irrationality, alongside intersecting ine- socially situated explanation of gaslighting. qualities, is built into interpersonal relation- ships and social institutions, generating gender-based vulnerabilities to abuse. A soci- Intersectional and Institutional ological theory of gaslighting must therefore Inequalities account for the following: gender-based ste- Intersectional scholarship reveals that racial reotypes, intersecting forms of structural vul- discrimination, immigration policy, and poverty nerability, and institutional inequalities. shape the dynamics of abuse and its effects (Ferraro 2006; Menjívar 2011; Miller 2008; Richie 1996; Sokoloff and Dupont 2005). A Sociological Theory of Gaslighting “Everywoman” is not equally likely to be Psychological theories suggest that gaslight- abused (Richie 2000, 2012). Rather, intersecting ing takes place in an isolated dyad. In con- inequalities make women of color, poor women, trast, I propose that gaslighting draws from immigrant women, and disabled women more and exacerbates the gender-based power vulnerable to abuse (Menjívar 2011; Miller imbalances present in intimate relationships 2008; Richie 2012). Race, class, and immigrant and in the larger social context. I expand on status are critical for understanding the intersec- these two dimensions of gaslighting in what tional context in which abuse differentially follows. shapes victims’ lives.7 Institutions such as police, housing pro- Part 1: Gaslighting is consequential when ex- grams, universities, and workplaces also ecuted in unequal intimate relationships, how inequalities translate into intimate creating an environment of “surreality.” Sweet 857

Stern (2018) and others have found that gas- phenomenon (i.e., domestic violence) as an lighting depends on some level of intimacy access point. I investigated this phenomenon between perpetrator and victim. This is to be through 18 months of fieldwork, including expected, because intimacy or an institutional archival research on feminist , in- relationship binds victim and perpetrator, depth interviews and participant observation such that she cannot simply dismiss his gas- with domestic violence professionals (N = lighting efforts. Indeed, surveys indicate all 55), and life story interviews with survivors forms of gender-based violence are more of domestic violence (N = 43). This article common when there is an intimate relation- relies on the interviews with domestic vio- ship between victim and perpetrator (WHO lence survivors, although its themes are also 2017). The IPV literature further shows that informed by the professional interviews. gaslighting creates an environment of “surre- In the analysis, I marshal life story inter- ality” for victims. Joining these insights, a views to uncover the mechanisms and trace sociological theory of gaslighting must the processes (see Small 2009:22) via which explain how surreality is created and main- gaslighting operates. My interview methodol- tained in power-laden intimate relationships. I ogy is well-suited to the development of a distinguish gaslighting from other forms of rich, situated explanation of gaslighting psychological abuse by showing how it sys- because in-depth interviews help uncover the tematically constructs victims as “crazy” and mechanisms buried in complex social phe- irrational—particularly by relying on stereo- nomena. Life story interviews are especially types about femininity. useful for contextualizing gaslighting in the macro context of women’s lives, as the details Part 2: Gaslighting is consequential when of life stories illuminate how large-scale abusers mobilize gender-based stereotypes, forces shape and impinge on practices (Abu- intersecting inequalities, and institutional Lughod 1991). Additionally, rather than vulnerabilities against victims. imposing a framework, life story interviews allow for experiences to emerge on interview- Gaslighting could not exist without inequities ees’ own terms (Atkinson 2007; O’Connell in the distribution of social, political, and Davidson and Layder 1994). This method economic power. The grooves of social thus helps expose forms of abuse that may be inequality and cultural stereotyping provide unnamable for victims themselves. footing for gaslighting strategies. Specifi- To conduct life story interviews with sur- cally, gaslighting is gendered due to the asso- vivors of domestic violence, I met women in ciation of femininity with irrationality, which domestic violence support groups. I recruited makes women more vulnerable to this form women at four groups in Chicago and sur- of abuse. The findings of this study reveal rounding areas. All participating support that the effects of gaslighting are more dra- groups were located in feminist-founded, matic for women on the margins, who may nonprofit domestic violence .8 I experience increased institutional surveil- had access to groups as a longtime volunteer lance and lack of institutional credibility. and a state-certified domestic violence advo- cate myself. Support group leaders either Data and Methods handed out information about my research or asked me to attend their groups to describe Gaslighting is a feature of power-laden inti- my project. Members were eligible to partici- mate relationships, so I use domestic violence pate if they had experienced domestic vio- as a strategic case to develop a theory of gas- lence, identified as a woman, and were over lighting. Because of its invisibility, it would 18 years old. An interpreter accompanied me be difficult to conduct interviews about gas- to Spanish-speaking groups and interviews, lighting without using a more identifiable otherwise I conducted interviews alone. 858 American Sociological Review 84(5)

I interviewed 43 women for this study over involves two stages: initial coding (discovery a 12-month period; 12 women were inter- of concepts through intensive reading) and viewed two to four times. I interviewed 33 focused coding (synthesizing across themes) women in English and 10 in Spanish along- (Charmaz 1983). After multiple readings of side an interpreter. Women chose the time and the 1,825 single-spaced pages of transcribed location of their interviews, which typically interviews, I wrote a memo about each wom- lasted between two and four hours and usu- an’s life story. This memo-writing process ally took place in women’s homes or in a allowed me to preserve the interview as a domestic violence agency. Because they whole piece of data. Following memo-writing, attended support groups, all the women I I developed codes to connect across memos. interviewed were accustomed to talking about This research aims to develop a conceptual domestic violence. Nonetheless, I attempted explanation rather than generalize to a popu- to mitigate emotional risk by breaking the lation; as such, memo-writing and coding are interview into two parts. First, I asked open- useful in this case-based causal analysis ended questions such as, “Tell me about your- (Headworth 2019). Drawing the codes self.” During the second part of the interview, together, I then “mapped” connections using I asked a pre-arranged set of questions about Clarke’s (2005) “situated analysis.” Clarke women’s experiences in institutions, about (2005:176) calls for developing situational their own interpretations of violence, and “maps” to move toward a relational analysis about their experiences of “crazy-making.” that connects macro and micro elements, put- The gaslighting question was phrased in the ting the “situation of all the data together.” following way: “Some women have told me Following this approach, I drew a map of that their partners called them ‘crazy’ or did “micro” gaslighting tactics alongside larger things to make them feel ‘crazy.’ Did you forces in women’s lives. I connected the ele- experience that?” All but three of the 43 ments of the map by drawing lines between women I interviewed reported that their abus- them, organizing the map into analytic cate- ers called them “crazy.” All 43 women gories. Figure 1 presents the situational map described some degree of gaslighting, espe- for gaslighting. cially their abuser “flipping” stories or events While this figure is intended as a visualiza- to make them seem like “the crazy one.” tion of my coding schema rather than as a All interviews were digitally recorded and theoretical model, it is useful for understand- transcribed verbatim. Transcripts were stripped ing how gaslighting tactics rely on stereo- of names and other identifying information. types (gendered, racialized, and sexual) and Women were offered a small monetary incen- institutional settings. The diagram is hierar- tive for participation, per Institutional Review chical, such that the “tactics” are made pos- Board guidelines. Of the 43 women who par- sible as a result of stereotypes and the ticipated, all but two identified a male partner mobilization of those stereotypes in powerful as their primary abuser.9 Table 1 provides a institutional settings. “Stereotypes” and descriptive overview of the women inter- “institutional settings” operate as background viewed. Income is approximated by the way contexts for the success of these gaslighting women described “getting by” at the time of tactics in manipulating women’s realities. the interview.10 Despite the women’s diverse To ensure validity, I triangulated my backgrounds, all described “crazy-making.” schema with my other data sources and with However, the specific ways abusers mobilized extant literature. This schema syncs with my gender stereotypes and institutions depended knowledge as a participant and researcher in on factors such as race and nationality. the field, having spent many years as a hotline I used coding and mapping techniques to advocate, shelter volunteer, and participant analyze the data. Coding is the link between observer. I also discussed findings with pro- the data and the conceptual scheme and fessionals in the field. Domestic violence Sweet 859

Table 1. Survivor Demographics, N = 43

N % N %

Race Immigrant Status White 13 30% U.S.-born 27 63% Black/African American 11 26% Documented immigrant 4 9% Latina 17 40% Undocumented (during abuse) 12 28% Arab 1 2% South Asian 1 2% Duration of Relationship Less than 1 year 1 2% Family Class Background 1 to 3 years 0 0% Poor or working class 29 67% 4 to 6 years 4 9% Middle class 14 33% 7 to 9 years 8 19% 10+ years 16 37% Primary Means of “Getting By” Ongoing 4 9% Paid work only (full- or part-time) 6 14% N/A or unknown 3 7% support 11 26% Multiple of different length 7 16% or other combined 18 42% public assistance No income/family support 8 19% Housing Situation Rental 24 56% Education Owns home 7 16% Less than high school 13 30% Section 8 rental 4 9% High school degree 11 26% With family 6 14% Some college or vocational 11 26% Housing program 2 5% College degree 8 19% Mean age 41 Number of Children 0 6 14% 1 6 14% 2 13 30% 3 12 28% 4+ 6 14%

Has children under 6 years old 13 30%

professionals talked to me regularly about the the present analysis, but these interviews pro- need for more research on gaslighting (inter- vide a justificatory frame for the project, vali- views with Judy 7.9.15; Michelle 9.30.15; my contention that gaslighting is an Caroline 12.8.15; Marie 3.16.16; Lucy independently significant feature of abuse.11 1.30.15). In general, professionals felt vexed Because the women I interviewed were by problems with identifying, prosecuting, recruited from domestic violence organiza- and therapeutically responding to gaslighting. tions, they had all experienced intense forms of I attended two trainings for domestic violence control and in their relationships, therapists in which victims’ experiences of which may have affected my results. However, confusion, micro-regulation, and unreality my sample allows me to illuminate diverse were major themes (field notes 12.16.15; structural contexts for gaslighting, its rooted- 2.19–2.21.16). Both workshops focused on ness in gender stereotypes, and its control- developing therapeutic techniques to help ling consequences. I am limited in my women overcome the sense of unreality that capacity to explicate mechanisms of gas- characterizes abusive relationships. I do not lighting by differentiating within my sample, discuss my interviews with professionals in because all the women I interviewed 860 American Sociological Review 84(5)

Figure 1. Situational Map of Gaslighting described “crazy-making.” Nonetheless, I effective when mobilized as part of a larger show how women differ across institutional pattern of gender-based power and control. vulnerabilities: undocumented women experi- Speaking to the overriding sense of surreality ence gaslighting in the context of immigration, created in their relationships, the women in whereas black women’s abusers are more this study described their abusers “twisting” likely to use gaslighting in the context of reality ( 2.4.16), “flipping the script” police and courts.12 (Susan 10.6.16), creating a of the “Twi- light Zone” (Julie 2.16.16), “manipulating,” “messing with,” and “controlling” their minds “Crazy Bitch”: Gender (interviews with Alma 7.13.15; Kathy 3.1.16; and Gaslighting L.L. 7.28.15), and “changing the facts” (Mar- Gaslighting tactics yoke together physical and tha 3.1.16). Adriana described her relationship verbal incidents of abuse into an overall sense as “circles and circles” in which she did not of lost reality and confusion. These tactics are know which way was up or down (interview Sweet 861

7.29.15). Across racial and socioeconomic Simone: Yeah. Like, that I’m absolutely crazy backgrounds, women identified a hostile atmo- and I can’t be around the kids. It was terri- sphere of confusion and distortion. This atmo- ble. [He would say] that adulterous women sphere was gendered in the sense that “crazy” run in my family. . . . He would say, “Be a was associated with the epithet “bitch,” with mother.” Because he would always be say- ing that I’m not a good enough mother. motherhood, and with women’s bodies. (interview 8.31.15) When I asked women about their partners’ abusive tactics, they often described being Simone’s ex-husband hacked into her social called a “crazy bitch.” This phrase came up so media accounts during the and cre- frequently, I began to think of it as the literal ated public posts that made her appear unsta- discourse of gaslighting. In gaslighting dynam- ble. He also accessed her bank accounts and ics, the idea that women are saturated with moved money around randomly, intentionally emotion and incapable of reason is mobilized using tactics that evaded police attention. He into a pattern of that chip away at then cited these examples to friends and fam- women’s realities. For example, Britney, a ily, insisting she could not be trusted with the 30-year-old black woman, told me her abuser children. His covert efforts left her feeling she loved spinning the webs of a debate, especially could not identify what was real anymore. when it left her feeling diminished. If she Simone’s abuser embedded his attacks on her showed emotion during arguments, he called sanity in attacks on her sexuality and mother- her “crazy”—incapable of providing a legiti- hood, claiming she had “orgies” and was not mate counter-argument. Any show of emotion fit to be a mother. Simone had recently come from Britney was immediately pathologized out as bisexual, suggesting that he sought to and she was rendered overwrought, her hus- mobilize a stigmatized sexual identity against band the holder of “reason.” This affected her to make her seem unstable. These gas- Britney’s desire to stand up for herself as she lighting strategies played on Simone’s exist- began questioning her “mental state”: ing social vulnerabilities: her supposed failings as a mother and deviant sexuality Britney: God forbid I lose my cool—“She’s became her abuser’s weapons to make her crazy, she’s crazy.” seem “crazy.” Author: He would call you crazy? Britney: [nodding] “She’s crazy, she’s crazy.” Women often described how their abusers (interview 1.26.16) associated their actions and statements with the idea that women are “crazy,” “careless,” These tactics culminated in a violent event in and emotionally unregulated. Ebony’s partner which Britney’s abuser beat her and held her would steal her money and then tell her she underwater in a bathtub, insisting all the while was “careless” about finances and had lost it that he was simply trying to “calm her down.” herself (interview 7.6.15). Adriana’s boy- This consistent construction of women as friend hid her phone and then told her she had “crazy” ranged from private arguments to pub- lost it, in a dual effort to confuse her and lic campaigns. Simone referred to her abuser’s prevent her from communicating with others sustained attempt to delegitimize her as “the (interview 7.29.15). Jenn described her ex- crazy narrative” (interview 8.31.15). After she as a “chameleon” who made up left him, he attacked her sanity relentlessly dur- small stories to confuse her, like lying about ing divorce and child custody proceedings, even what color shirt he had worn the day before to using old mental records against her: make her feel disoriented (interview 2.18.16). Luz told me, “He was so astute. When things Simone: He said all sorts of terrible things happened, he would turn it around and make about me in the divorce papers . . . like I had it seem like something else was going on” orgies at the house, which isn’t true. I am (interview 9.10.15). When Jaylene’s boy- not that way at all. [long pause] friend pushed her, he also yelled at her, say- Author: He was trying to discredit you? ing, “Look what you made me do . . . you’re 862 American Sociological Review 84(5) crazy” (interview 7.27.15). Emily described “ridiculous” for having morning sickness, her ex-husband stealing her keys so she could insisting that her symptoms were not real, she not leave the house and then insisting she had was inventing them for attention, and she lost them “again” (interview 10.26.15). would never be a good mother (interview As these examples indicate, men’s efforts 12.14.15). Carla’s abuser cast her body as out to make women feel “crazy” involved small of control, suggesting an excessive and dis- strategies of control and confusion. Each reputable femininity. Luisa’s abuser also cast example deals with the theme of irrationality, her body as pathologically feminine. He and all were used by male partners in conjunc- forced her to take his anti-depressant pills, tion with the “crazy” label, often alongside the insisting she needed them because of “wom- term “bitch.” Men used masculinity—which en’s issues”: “He used to give me small pills. gave them access to “rationality”—to associ- He was saying because I have menstruation. ate their partners with lack of reason, a femi- He was blaming it on me, every time I wanted nine quality. As Emily explained, the result is to end the relationship, he was saying it’s that “you go to actually believing that you’re because I have [an imbalance] in my hor- ugly, worthless, you ain’t going to do nothing mones” (interview 8.26.15). Luisa’s boy- but have a bunch of babies” (interview friend relied on the idea that women are 10.26.15). For Emily, the effects of gaslight- inherently unstable to perpetuate her depend- ing were gendered and racialized: her fear of ence on him and undermine her reality. In this losing respectability as a black woman—being way, gaslighting tactics draw on the associa- worthless for having “a bunch of babies”— tion of femininity with irrationality specifi- was exacerbated by her abuser’s attempts to cally via motherhood and embodiment. make her seem careless (i.e., hiding her keys The women I interviewed learned to take and making her late to work). extreme measures to avoid gaslighting, dem- As Emily’s quotation shows, women expe- onstrating that this form of abuse may put rienced gendered accusations of insanity in women at elevated risk of physical violence. the context of related vulnerabilities also Susan, a 32-year-old black woman, explained: being mobilized against them, especially “You feel like it’s actually witches out here. It around motherhood. Nevaeh’s abuser testi- will get to the point that you feel like that. fied in court that she was “unstable” and Like, did this person hypnotize me or drug “depressed,” using diagnostic to me? . . . I had a self before I got with him. . . . label her an unfit mother. Her abuser’s accu- I made more decisions and I knew myself. [It] sations that she was “crazy” followed her got to the point that I wanted him to hit me, to through years of child custody proceedings get it over with. . . . Cause the worst part was (interview 2.26.16). Like Simone’s abuser, messing with my head” (interview 10.22.15). Nevaeh’s partner used assumptions of exces- Several women I interviewed explained that sively feminine emotionality—he cited exam- they preferred physical to psychological ples of Nevaeh —in an effort to abuse, and they would sometimes provoke undermine her credibility as a mother: “He physical violence to avoid “crazy-making” denied everything [about the violence] and (Maria S. 7.28.15; Luz 9.10.15). Maria S. made it seem like I . . . created these believed physical violence would validate in my head” (interview 7.6.15). Nevaeh that her experiences were genuinely abusive: described feeling so exhausted by his manip- “[Physical abuse] would be more compatible ulations that she eventually came to ask her- with reality” (interview 7.28.15). self if she was in fact “crazy.” This evidence shows that gaslighting is Embodiment was also key to abusers’ use linked to insidious patterns of control, in of gender-based stereotypes to make women which women are denied mobility, access to feel “crazy.” When Carla was pregnant, her their social networks, and institutional help. boyfriend told her she was “crazy” and For example, Susan described her ex’s Sweet 863 gaslighting tactics in terms of “flipping the 41-year-old Latina woman, described how her script,” meaning he would transform stories ex-husband would invent tales of her infideli- and events to make it seem like she was the ties and try to convince her they were true: aggressor. These strategies were effective when used alongside a range of other tactics: He’d make things up that didn’t happen. he told the children she was “crazy,” followed Sometimes he’d tell me things like, “A Susan when she left the house, monitored her saw you at X place and that you were phone calls and text messages, and called her with someone.” Things like that. I’d get friends to check up on her. He would then upset and tell him, “Bring him. Bring him to insist she had problems. Susan sug- my face and we’ll see if it’s true. I didn’t do gested that gaslighting causes one’s sense of anything and wasn’t at such place.” But reality to become haunted by inexplicable he’d make things up. . . . He’d say that I was distortions. She told me several times that crazy and all that. . . . I told him that I wasn’t “domestic violence comes with a lot of confu- crazy, that he was the crazy one. Obviously, sion” (interview 10.6.15). She slowly came to he would start everything and then make me believe his manipulations as he cut her off feel [like I started it]. . . . Sometimes I did from loved ones. He even took scissors to her feel confused. (interview 2.12.16) home phone lines so she could not call the police. Gaslighting was part of an overall Rosa’s ex-husband tried to convince her she coercive and controlling context for Susan—it was cheating on him, a constant accusation was effective because it cast her as noncredi- that obsessed him. He used these stories to ble and unstable, leaving her isolated and dis- justify following Rosa when she left the house oriented. Susan’s abuser relied on stereotypes and beating her physically when she came about women as excessively emotional— home. Rosa regularly had to defend herself crazed about —to execute this control. against his version of events, which was also a By drawing from and reinforcing the asso- defense of her own sexual respectability. ciation of femininity with emotionality and The women I interviewed often had to irrationality, abusers’ gaslighting tactics make defend their sexual against their motherhood, embodiment, and reason itself abusers’ outrageous accusations. Cultural into sites of confusion. These tactics often ideas about women’s dangerous, unruly plunge women into a sense of lost reality, sexuality—especially stereotypes surround- worsening their entrapment and isolation. The ing black and Latina women’s “bad girl” feeling of “twilight zone” created in these sexuality (Garcia 2012)—underlie attempts to relationships depends on the effective mobili- unmake their realities. Jaylene, a 23-year-old zation of gendered stereotypes in an unequal Latina woman, explained that her partner intimate context. constantly calls her a “ho” and insists she needs psychiatric help. He pressures her to drink alcohol and then calls her names (e.g., Sexuality and “”) when he thinks she has drunk too Gaslighting much (interview 7.27.15). Jaylene’s boy- Gaslighting efforts are further embedded in friend embeds his accusations that she is the gendered (and racialized) social organiza- “crazy” in attacks on her sexuality and in tion of sexuality. For the women I inter- attempts to make her seem out of control by viewed, attacks on sexual respectability were forcing alcohol on her. He invents stories a regular part of intimate abuse, rooted in the about her continued interest in ex-, association of female sexuality with devious- stories against which Jaylene is forced to ness, danger, and . These attacks became defend herself to avoid violence. Throughout part of gaslighting, establishing a hostile envi- our interview, Jaylene insisted, “I’m not the ronment of surreality. For example, Rosa, a crazy one” (interview 7.27.15). 864 American Sociological Review 84(5)

Fabiola explained the relationship between “violence” because her boyfriend used invisi- sexuality, “crazy”-making, and gender very ble strategies such as pathologizing her sexu- clearly: “Every man has a different way to ality, making up stories about her infidelities, make the girl feel like she’s crazy or she’s the and following her. Adriana’s boyfriend bad one” (interview 7.24.15). Being a “bad” instructed his friends to keep an eye on Adri- sexual subject and being “crazy” are closely ana while she was at school, and he would linked in the power dynamics Fabiola laid later accuse her of sneaking away with other out. Assumptions about women’s dangerous men whenever his friends lost sight of her. He sexuality undergird abusers’ attempts to con- peppered her with questions each night on the struct their victims as unstable. For example, phone about who she had been with, keeping Fabiola’s partner regularly called her “nasty” her awake so she was too exhausted to leave and “sick” after they had sex. He accused her for school in the morning. She was expected of not loving him if she did not sleep with to call him as soon as she woke up to ensure him, and when she did, he denigrated her she was still at home and to get approval of sexuality. This created a situation in which her clothing. Despite this , he Fabiola—who described herself as a proudly insisted Adriana had been sleeping around. “sexual person”—could not rely on her sex- Adriana’s abuser linked accusations of infidel- ual identity to ground her reality, because it ity directly to accusations that her memory was constantly used as a weapon against her. was untrustworthy and to tactics that kept her Fabiola’s sense that she was “bad” was exhausted and disoriented. amplified by the fact that she had immigrated to Abusers frequently defined women’s sexu- the United States to be with her boyfriend: “He ality as reckless, devious, and in need of said, ‘You are crazy. No one you. You are masculine control. Mariposa, a 46-year-old here with me. You don’t have anyone else Latina woman, told me her partner convinced here’” (interview 7.10.15). Because Fabiola himself that he “saw” her have sex with other was isolated from others who could have men at her job, even though he had never offered her a different narrative about the rela- been to her workplace (interview 7.7.15). tionship, her boyfriend’s attempts to undermine Margaret’s husband convinced her she was her sanity and sexual identity were more effec- attracting too much attention by dressing up, tive. When Fabiola tried to leave her boyfriend, doing her hair, and wearing make-up (inter- he threatened to “prove” she was crazy in court view 7.24.15). She began to believe his sto- so she would lose custody of their daughter and ries about men leering at her, so she started face deportation. Similarly, Maria S.’s ex-hus- wearing sweatshirts and overeating—in her band asked for sex and then told her she was words, she stopped “taking care” of herself to too sexually forward, that she did not know appease his suspicions. Carla’s husband also how to behave properly as a wife “in this coun- preferred it if she “looked messy” when he try” (interview 7.28.15). Maria S.’s partner came home from work, otherwise, “he started constructed her as a sexual deviant and cultural telling me that . . . I’d surely been prostitut- outsider simultaneously, attempting to make ing” (interview 12.14.15). Carla’s husband her feel sexually and culturally disoriented. tried to convince her she was sleeping with These tactics were possible because of Maria men in the neighborhood, pointing to men on S.’s gender-based to stereotypes the street, asking her to identify which ones about her sexuality and nationality. were waiting for her. He called her a “prosti- Structural vulnerabilities—gender, nation- tute” for having an IUD (intrauterine device, ality, sexuality—create the terrain upon which a form of birth control) and forced her to have gaslighting tactics become successful. The it removed. His sexual gaslighting strategies invisibility of this form of abuse amplifies inhibited Carla’s mobility—she began to stay those tactics. Adriana, a 22-year-old Latina home all the time, refusing to go out because woman, struggled to define her experiences as she feared the stories he might invent. Sweet 865

Gaslighting tactics force women to shut where they experienced diminished credibility down sexual expression, to hide themselves in and stereotypes of aggressiveness; and for the home, away from their preferred perfor- women who needed or used ser- mances of femininity. In part, making up sto- vices, abusers mobilized the stigma of mental ries of is about chipping away at health to make them seem like “the crazy one.” women’s sense of reality via attacks on their sexual identities, keeping them trapped in the Immigration System exhausting cycle of refuting the abuser’s con- structed reality. Sexual gaslighting is key to Maria L., who is undocumented, lived in con- understanding how gender sets the foundations stant fear that if she left her abuser, he would for and consequences of gaslighting: because turn her over to immigration authorities. He women’s sexuality is already a site of vulner- tied these to her supposed mental ability—subject to gender-based stereotyp- instability: “[He said] that he was going to ing—it easily becomes a feature of gaslighting. take me to a mental institution, that I was In the examples provided here, being a cultural crazy. He made me feel like I wasn’t a per- “outsider” amplified the harm of these tactics. son” (interview 12.9.15). Abusers commonly Gaslighting works by mobilizing stereotypes use threats of deportation against undocu- of female sexuality into on women’s mented women (Menjívar and Salcido 2002; realities, creating a surreal environment that Raj and Silverman 2002; Villalón 2010), but limits their autonomy and mobility. in Maria L.’s case those threats were linked to attempts to undermine her sanity. Maria’s abuser kept her in a state of insecurity by Institutional making her feel she was “insane” and that Vulnerabilities and immigration authorities would deport her Gaslighting because of it. Undocumented women experi- enced gaslighting in the context of the immi- Gaslighting strategies that draw on women’s gration system: their abusers made up stories institutional vulnerabilities are especially about them being surveilled and tracked, yet effective at keeping women isolated and their abusers were the ones actually executing entrapped: abusers manipulate women’s fear this type of surveillance. As a result, these of and lack of credibility in institutions to women felt insecure and “watched,” causing make them seem “crazy” and to control them them to question their own sanity and curtail- further. These institutional vulnerabilities ing their efforts to leave. depend on gender, sexual, and racial inequali- Abusers’ use of the immigration system is ties, which are built into the way women are connected to sexuality, since undocumented “read” and treated in institutional settings. women are often reliant on sexual relation- Institutions widely perceived as “helpful” for ships to secure or retain legal status. This victims therefore often become a feature of sense of displacement and helplessness ampli- gaslighting, because abusers use women’s fear fies surreality. Fabiola’s abuser told her that and lack of credibility against them in such no one else would want her because she was settings. I focus on immigration, police/courts, “just a Mexican” (interview 7.24.15). He used and mental health systems because these were this “” to insist that no one would believe the institutions women most frequently identi- her about the abuse, and he said he was fied as exacerbating gaslighting. For undocu- allowed to treat her this way because he was a mented women, abusers used threats and U.S. citizen. Liz’s husband insisted no one made-up stories about the immigration system would want her because she was undocu- to amplify surreality and insecurity; black mented (interview 12.4.15), and he convinced women were more likely to experience gas- her he had cancer so she would stay with him, lighting in the context of police and courts, inventing doctors’ appointments and faking 866 American Sociological Review 84(5) illness from chemotherapy. Because Liz was Police and Courts afraid of being tracked via the healthcare sys- tem, she was too isolated to figure out his . Susan described an incident when she called For both women, these were not just insults, the police after her boyfriend assaulted her: but attempts to make them feel displaced: “The police talked to me. Then [my boyfriend their abusers sought to normalize their abuse said to me], ‘You know I wasn’t doing that, and manipulations by constructing Fabiola you know that. Did you hear me? Are you and Liz as outsiders. Maria L., Liz, and Fabi- blanking out? What’s wrong?’ [speaks in a ola were already in precarious legal situations, fake concerned voice] He’d make eye motions so their abusers’ “crazy-making” tactics took with me, like, are you going crazy?” (interview on the flavor of their vulnerabilities in the 10.22.15). As Susan tried to tell the police immigration system. All were dependent on what happened, her abuser interceded to make sexual relationships to remain in the country, it seem as if she were making up the story, as trapping them at the intersection of gaslight- if she were having and was too ing and legal precarity. unstable to understand what had happened. Made-up stories about Immigration and Susan’s credibility with the police was already Customs Enforcement (ICE) patrols also in jeopardy because she had called them so appeared regularly in interviews with undocu- many times: “It got to the point where the mented women. Delma’s husband invented police didn’t believe me because I kept going stories about immigration authorities looking back. Like, 15th time it happened and they was for her in the neighborhood. She therefore called, they were like . . . you’re the problem” “closed” herself in the house because she was (interview 10.22.15). Susan’s abuser used this exhausted by his attempts to disorient her lack of credibility and police abandonment (interview 2.26.16). When Rubi tried to flee to against her, exacerbating her isolation. another state with her children, her husband Susan’s abuser manipulated event narra- told her he had sent ICE after her (interview tives, accused her of being a “crazy bitch,” 3.2.16). She was forced to return. Her husband and mobilized police mistrust of her to also insisted she was a witch who had hired a unravel her social context. I found that abus- shaman to keep him trapped in their , ers used the refrain of “crazy bitch” alongside although it was he who was following her and manipulations of institutional authority to keeping her trapped in the home (interview assert that women are unreliable witnesses to 3.2.16). Rubi’s husband used the threat of ICE their own experiences. This insistence that to keep her under his control, and he “flipped” women cannot offer credible testimony is part reality—using tales of the feminine supernatural— of the gendered core of gaslighting and is to insist she was the one who would not let go rooted in the association of femininity with of the relationship. irrationality. Women described feeling that The immigration system becomes a fea- court officials and police were more likely to ture of gaslighting when abusers use women’s believe men’s stories because their abusers precarious legal status to amplify surreality, were skilled at “telling a good story” (Gwyn making women feel insecure and surveilled. 11.3.15). Gender intersects with race and Accusations that women are “crazy” are more class here, such that Susan’s social position- dangerous for undocumented women, who ing as a poor, black woman made her excep- have reasons to fear the immigration system. tionally unreliable to police, amplifying her Undocumented women were genuinely fear- lack of credibility. Susan’s abuser leveraged ful of immigration authorities, fear that their institutional mistrust of her to rob her of abusers mobilized against them to make them authorities who would corroborate her story feel “watched.” The threat of surveillance and and protect her from future violence. deportation thereby sharpened the blade of Rosalyn’s abuser also undermined her in “crazy-making” efforts. front of police, relying on stereotypes about Sweet 867 black women as aggressive. Rosalyn representative] to not respond to that, I was described an altercation on a busy street that baffled. (interview 9.14.15) led to police involvement: “By the time I . . . can [stand] up, the police are on top of me, Tina’s ex pulled hair out of her scalp, slammed talking about, ‘Stop before we tase you.’ . . . her against walls, strangled her, and broke her [My ex] was very charming. . . . He’s like, furniture, but he believed he was “non- ‘You know she crazy. That’s my baby violent” because Tina never had a black eye. momma. . . . She just mad cause we can’t get The abuse was so severe that he had been back together’” (interview 2.12.16). Rosa- prosecuted multiple times on felony charges. lyn’s abuser convinced police that she was the Still, he insisted Tina was “crazy” and exag- aggressor and they arrested her. After the gerating. He manipulated the child represen- arrest, Rosalyn was forced to flee to a domes- tative into endorsing his version of events, tic violence shelter in the suburbs. jeopardizing Tina’s custody of their children. These tactics mirrored other gaslighting Tina’s abuser relied on the that strategies Rosalyn’s abuser used: he told women are prone to to under- friends and family on social media that she mine her status as victim, making her seem was “crazy” and invented stories that she “crazy” in a powerful institutional setting. was following him. Rosalyn began to believe As Susan’s, Tina’s, and Rosalyn’s experi- his version of events because he was so out- ences indicate, systems such as police and spoken about the idea that she had lost her courts are central to gaslighting, especially for mind and was desperately trying to get him black women. The legal system becomes a back (interview 2.12.16). Rosalyn’s abuser critical site of gaslighting when abusers gain damaged her institutional credibility, deny- control of the narrative and “flip” stories and ing her a rightful victim status, while also events, drawing on stereotypes about women denying her from friends and fam- as irrational, and especially about black ily. He marked Rosalyn as a desperate, women as aggressive. In this way, institutional crazed woman, relying on the association of authorities sometimes become unknowing women’s sexuality with irrationality. These colluders in gaslighting tactics, setting women stereotypes were especially effective when up for further violence and loss of credibility. Rosalyn’s abuser mobilized them in front of police. Mental Health System Tina, also a black woman in her 30s, pro- vides another example of the connection The mental health system is a key site of vul- between gaslighting and powerful institu- nerability because abusive partners regularly tions. She explained what happened when she interfere in healthcare decision-making and her ex were arguing at the courthouse (McCloskey et al. 2007). The women I inter- while the child representative—an official viewed frequently discussed the role of the responsible for mediating their custody mental health system in exacerbating gas- arrangement—looked on: lighting. Women reported being both barred from and forced to use mental health services— I was always being called crazy. Even when in both cases, these tactics cast women as [the child representative] had me cornered “crazy,” mobilizing the stigma of mental in the hallway with him, and my kids’ father health use against them. says, “I never punched you, though.” He Women have solid reasons for fearing their says that. “I never blacked your eye. I never abusers’ constructions of them as “crazy,” punched you.” And I looked at the child rep, that typically involve losing custody of and I was like, “He feels like since he never their children or losing credibility in social punched me in the eye or busted my lip that networks. Margaret described her first hus- it wasn’t abuse.” . . . And for [the child band’s threats to take their children away 868 American Sociological Review 84(5) from her if she saw a therapist: “Right after I against her will, insisting she needed profes- had [my son], I felt worthless. . . . I thought I sional help and that he could institutionalize should just go away and he should get a better her, using gender-based stereotypes and mom. So that’s when I started talking to [my immigration-related isolation against her. husband] about it, and he said, ‘You go [to a Second, he tried to convince her she was therapist] and I’ll prove you’re nuts. Go “crazy” by making up stories that cast her as ahead’” (interview 7.24.15). Margaret’s hus- the primary abuser in the relationship, making band prevented her from getting help for what her fearful of seeking outside help. she now refers to as postpartum , Independent use of mental health services using the stigma of mental health to keep her can also provide fodder for gaslighting strate- trapped and isolated from resources. gies. Three of the women I interviewed were Luisa experienced a different form of gas- institutionalized as an indirect result of domes- lighting through the mental health system tic violence, and all of them felt this experi- when her abuser forced her to see his psychia- ence worsened their abusers’ gaslighting trist. He performed this manipulation easily tactics upon release. Adriana explained, “When because, as a new immigrant, she was intimi- I got out of the hospital, he was like, ‘I fucking dated by the mental health system and believed told you that you were insane! What type of he had the power to institutionalize her. Lui- person gets locked up in a hospital? How crazy sa’s abuser also drugged her with anti- are you!’” (interview 7.29.15). Adriana’s boy- psychotic medication to force her into harmful friend used the hospitalization to mark her as sexual acts. Afterward, when Luisa told him psychologically defective, eroding her auton- she was going to leave, he threatened to bring omy. He used the mental health system as her underwear to her boss to reveal what a leverage to construct her as the really “crazy” “whore” she was (interview 8.26.15). Luisa one, heightening her of for the felt she was the problem because she was an environment of surreality in which she lived. immigrant and did not understand the ways of Because women already feel vulnerable and relationships in the United States. Luisa’s lack autonomy when accessing residential abuser combined “crazy-making” strategies mental health services (Warshaw and Tinnon rooted in lies about the mental health system 2018), this experience can become a site of with attacks on her sexuality and nationality further coercion in gaslighting tactics. (calling her a “fucking immigrant”). As these accounts show, mental health and Luisa’s experiences of gaslighting were legal systems are sites where the harms of exacerbated by her abuser’s manipulation of gaslighting may be exacerbated. Inventing her memory of events. In one early episode, stories about infidelities, insisting that he pressured her into drinking alcohol, then women are “crazy” and overly emotional, provoked her into an argument and claimed and manipulating memories are more damag- she “went crazy” and physically assaulted ing when executed in institutions where him. Luisa did not remember acting violently. women already experience fear, diminished Still, he used this alleged incident against autonomy, and lack of credibility. In this Luisa any time she threatened to leave, telling way, gaslighting exploits conditions of insti- her he would expose her as “the real abuser” tutional discrimination or, in the case of in the relationship: she was out of control, mental health, stigma related to use. Institu- unreasonable, an alcoholic, and physically tions are transformed into sites of harm when abusive. As Ferraro (2006) notes, men’s abusers mobilize women’s fear of and lack of attempts to cast women as the “real” abusers credibility in these powerful settings to make are central to establishing surreality. Luisa them seem “crazy.” In this way, institutions experienced at least two forms of mental become part of the gaslighting routine, isolat- health system-related gaslighting. First, her ing victims from support and contributing to abuser forced her to go to a psychiatrist surreality. Sweet 869

Extending The Case takes place in a steeply hierarchical setting. The student’s career status is a clear vulnera- My goal is not simply to reveal gaslighting as bility, used to establish power and discredit the a mechanism of control in abusive relation- student’s complaints. Unlike in cases of ships, but to use the case of domestic violence domestic violence, the hierarchical institu- to build a theoretical framework for gaslight- tional setting in a mentor–mentee relationship ing that can be translated into other contexts. is likely more salient than is gender. Still, the The theory offered here posits that gaslighting gender of the mentor matters, and he associates is rooted in power-laden intimate relation- the student with feminized irrationality: the ships, creates a sense of surreality, and mobi- mentor is the holder of (masculine) reason, and lizes gender-based stereotypes, intersecting the student is constructed as unreasonable and inequalities, and institutional vulnerabilities unknowledgeable. The mentor accuses the stu- against victims. This theory specifies how dent of irrationality and lack of know-how, abstract social inequalities can be transformed feminizing and discrediting him. The student is into interpersonal weapons. How could this labeled “overly sensitive” because of age and theoretical framework be applied to situations ignorant of academia, potentially because of outside the context of domestic violence? race and class. The student experiences “sur- We could imagine an otherwise analytically reality” because this takes place in a power confusing situation between an academic men- relationship and maybe this is just how mentor tor, a white man in his 50s, and a graduate stu- relationships are supposed to work. Finally, dent, a working-class man of color in his 20s. these gaslighting strategies become public The mentor does not use physical or sexual when the mentor constructs the student as violence, but regularly asks the student for aca- “crazy” to colleagues. demic labor and then denies him public credit, Using the theoretical framework outlined asks him to share scholarly ideas and then tries here, we can avoid calling this just a “bad” to convince the student the ideas are the men- interpersonal situation. Instead, we can ana- tor’s own, and insists the student will not suc- lyze how gaslighting dynamics are made pos- ceed without him. When the student complains, sible and effective due to gender-based the mentor tells him he is an overly sensitive stereotypes, intersecting inequalities, and millennial who does not understand academia. institutional vulnerabilities. The context of a The mentor also informs his colleagues that the hierarchical institutional setting is especially student may require a mental health leave of critical in this case. Gender is still relevant to absence. The student is left feeling confused the construction of rationality here, although about his own ideas and about the boundaries less so as an individual-level variable. Over- of intellectual sharing. He feels isolated from all, gaslighting mobilizes and worsens the potential allies, fearing that rumors about his power inequalities already present in the rela- mental health may hurt his career. Nothing tionship and in the institutional setting. particularly documentable has occurred, but the student feels isolated, confused, and dimin- ished—powerless and controlled in an impor- Conclusions tant relationship. A context of unreality has Gaslighting is at risk of being extracted from been created for him, in a power-laden intimate its social conditions of possibility, as well as relationship, that exploits his institutional vul- its consequences, if it remains under-theorized nerabilities. Like many abusers in this study, by sociologists. Building a sociological the- the mentor likely has no conscious intention of ory of gaslighting, I have shown that micro “gaslighting” the student. tactics of abuse are situated in macro condi- Using the theoretical framework outlined in tions of inequality. The main argument is that this article, we can better understand this situ- gaslighting operates via the exploitation of ation. The relationship is power-unequal and social vulnerabilities in unequal intimate 870 American Sociological Review 84(5) relationships. This research contributes to the 1995; Schippers 2007), the gendered con- IPV literature by parsing mechanisms of gas- struction of rationality is key to how power is lighting and their socio-structural correlates distributed in the social world. Race and sex- as part of coercive control. I identify key uality also matter, suggesting these associa- social mechanisms via which gaslighting tac- tions are intersectional. Denying women’s tics create “surreality”; these include associ- realities and stripping them of credibility is a ating victims’ thoughts, speech, and actions long-standing feature of gender systems that with feminized irrationality, exploiting inter- operates with force in intimate relationships. secting inequalities related to race and nation- By theorizing gaslighting as part of inequality ality, and using victims’ lack of institutional in this way, it becomes clearer how current credibility against them. political strategies may successfully draw Because gaslighting is gendered, I expect from gaslighting strategies. it to be more common with male perpetrators Still, analyses that suggest Trump is gas- and female victims; however, gaslighting can lighting America go too far. The framework also work more generally by feminizing vic- offered in this article argues that gaslighting tims, as demonstrated in the mentor–mentee occurs in power-laden intimate relationships, thought experiment. Systematically associat- precisely because and coercive interper- ing another person with irrationality in a sonal strategies bind the victim to the perpe- power relationship is a gender-based strategy trator. The public has too much collective that reinforces power dynamics. This article power to experience gaslighting, such that we shows how men’s relative cultural and eco- can fact-check and push counter-narratives nomic capital, combined with their access to into the public sphere. Still, it is unsurprising “rationality” and institutional credibility, set that Trump and other leaders draw from gas- the conditions for gaslighting. For victims lighting strategies, as they are rooted in mas- with intersecting social marginalities related culine power and control. Positing gaslighting to race, ability, and legal status, these dynam- as a political strategy captures something ics are especially dangerous. important: manipulating others’ sense of real- Gaslighting warrants general considera- ity amplifies power; associating others with tion because it illuminates under-theorized feminized unreasonableness is useful for forms of social power. My goal is to under- domination.13 Thus, political analysts would stand how gender inequalities translate into do well to consider how and why feminizing the “surreal” strategies of interpersonal harm one’s opponents is effective for political dom- that have so captured public attention. Extend- ination, thereby highlighting the ways politi- ing this goal, we can see that attempts to cal discourses are fundamentally gendered. undermine women’s realities should be Finally, this research has policy implica- understood as constitutive of gender as a sys- tions related to domestic violence, such that tem. The case of gaslighting reveals the cen- public discourse and policies should extend trality of the cultural association of femininity abuse prevention, education, and awareness with irrationality in perpetuating gender ine- to gaslighting. Popular conceptualizations of quality, especially in intimate relationships. intimate abuse should go well beyond physi- Gender scholars should consider how this cal, verbal, and financial abuse. Women’s pervasive stereotype operates in gender-based stories of gaslighting suggest the invisibility social processes more generally, shaping of this form of abuse makes it especially dam- women’s ability to testify to their own social aging, cutting victims off from institutional realities and to control the course of social protections. Furthermore, attempts to address interactions. Whether gender is theorized as a psychological abuse presume that mental practice (West and Zimmerman 1987), an health and legal systems are “safe” for vic- institution (Martin 2004), a structure (Connell tims. This research shows that institutions, on 1987; Risman 2004), or a set of relations that the contrary, are sometimes a feature of the operate through binary oppositions (Connell abuse. Finally, the social embeddedness of Sweet 871 gaslighting reveals that attempts to address Paymar as part of the Domestic Abuse Intervention IPV will not be effective without considera- Project in Duluth, Minnesota in the mid-1980s. See https://www.theduluthmodel.org/wheels/ for more tion of macro vulnerabilities. Policies to pro- information on the wheel and its adaptations. tect against gaslighting should therefore focus 6. Many studies find that the most injurious forms of on increasing women’s institutional credibil- violence are executed by men against women, but ity and cultural and economic capital. men still experience abuse. In same-sex relation- ships, men report significant rates of victimization and power imbalances worsened by issues like Acknowledgments poverty, although these dynamics are under-studied I would like to thank Jocelyn Viterna, Claire L. Decoteau, (Stark and Hester 2019). Other research shows that Jonah Stuart Brundage, Kelly Underman, Danielle Giffort, male victims of IPV experience significant distress and Anna Skarpelis for their incredible guidance on this and emotional problems, but they are less likely to paper. My thanks also to the reviewers at be fearful of female partners and to uproot their ASR. I am grateful to the National Center on Domestic lives in response (Hester et al. 2017; Myhill 2017; Violence, Trauma, and Mental Health, to the women who Ross 2012). Men also report and embarrass- shared their stories with me, and to the domestic violence ment when they report IPV, as well as lack of ser- advocates who helped me understand the stakes of gas- vices (Tsui, Cheung, and Leung 2010). lighting in women’s lives. 7. Survey results suggest that women are assaulted, raped, and stalked by intimate partners at a rate of at least 1 in 4 or 1 in 5 (Black et al. 2011). Black and Native women face higher rates of intimate partner ORCID iD violence than the national average (Lacey et al. 2016). Paige L. Sweet https://orcid.org/0000-0002-9173-0396 See Garcia-Moreno and colleagues (2006) for global statistics. See Brush (2011) for a macro-level class- based analysis. See Purvin (2007) and Scott, London, Notes and Myers (2002) for how domestic violence affects 1. Originally adapted from a 1938 play by Patrick women’s economic autonomy. Finally, precarious Hamilton. legal status puts immigrant women at greater risk of 2. Their study follows the plot of the film Gaslight: violence and isolates them from institutions (Men- Charles Boyer’s character aims to drive Ingrid jívar and Abrego 2012; Menjívar and Salcido 2002; Bergman’s character to the point of involuntary Raj and Silverman 2002; Villalón 2010). institutionalization so he can steal her fortune. 8. Although recruiting women from domestic violence 3. The IPV literature is riven with long-standing support groups does not provide a representative debates on how best to measure violence and sample of domestic violence victims in general— whether domestic violence is a gendered phenom- who do not seek formal help remain a enon. Johnson’s typology (1995, 2006, 2008) seeks practically inaccessible group for qualitative inter- to address both impasses by arguing that embattled viewing—evidence suggests that recruiting from researchers are just studying distinct phenomena. support groups provides a relatively accurate view Thus, “intimate terrorism” refers to domestic vio- of heterosexual women victims who voluntarily or lence as a pattern of power and control (the feminist involuntarily seek formal help for “coercive con- model), whereas “situational couple violence” refers trol” types of domestic violence (Johnson 2006; Raj to the gender-equal phenomenon of couples fighting, and Silverman 2007; Stark 2007). without control or domination. Intimate terrorism is 9. One participant identified her primary abuser as her reflected in clinical and criminal samples, whereas father and another identified her brother. situational couple violence is found in “family con- 10. Socioeconomic status can be difficult to assess for flict” surveys (Johnson 2008; Kimmel 2002). domestic violence victims because many women 4. According to Johnson (1995, 2006, 2008), the most fall into low-income status when they leave male severe type of abuse found between partners is partners, or their partners interfere with their labor “intimate terrorism”: one partner (typically male) force participation (Brush 2011). Of the women I exercises dominance and control over the other part- interviewed, 29 subsisted primarily on child support ner (typically female). Similarly, Stark (2007) uses and public assistance. Many of the other women the term “coercive control” to refer to patterns of relied on cobbled-together resources from family gender-based in abusive relationships. and nonprofit agencies. Because domestic violence 5. The gendered nature of intimate terrorism is cap- agencies offer free services and emergency shelter, tured well in the Power and Control Wheel, a visual most of the women who access these agencies are representation of the feminist model of domestic low-income or experiencing homelessness (Bell violence developed by Ellen Pence and Michael 2003; Davis 2006; Tolman and Rosen 2001). 872 American Sociological Review 84(5)

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