What Bullying Is What Bullying Can Look Like in Elementary School What Bullying Can Look Like in Junior High School
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FS-570 BulliesBullies When I was a young boy, What bullying is What bullying the bully called me names, stole my bicycle, forced With all the focus that has surrounded can look like in me off the playground. teenage gangs and gun violence, it may elementary school be easy to forget that the teenage years He made fun of me in are not the only times that children face Being a victim is the most common front of other children, violent behavior. In fact, aggressive in second grade, and the likelihood of forced me to turn over behavior and bullying are even more being bullied decreases each year after my lunch money each day, common in elementary school than in that (see Figure 1). Bullies in elementary threatened to give me junior and senior high! Some studies school are more likely to pick on children a black eye if I told suggest that around 20 percent of all younger than themselves. Bullying is adult authority figures. American children have been the victim often very physical in nature, with open At different times I was of bullying at some point in elementary attacks of aggression being the most subject to a wide range of school, and about the same number common. Boys are more likely to be degradation and abuse – have described themselves as engaging doing the bullying, but girls and boys de-pantsing, spit in my face, in some form of bullying behavior. are equally likely to be victims. forced to eat the playground Bullying can range from teasing, to dirt....To this day, their stealing lunch money, to a group of handprints, like a slap students physically abusing a classmate. What bullying on the face, remain stark Even though bullying is very similar to can look like in and defined on my soul. other forms of aggression, there can be junior high school Eric E. Rofes – some distinctive features: Making our Schools Safe for Sissies Bullies in junior high school are more • The intention of bullying behavior likely to pick on people their same age, is purposeful, rather than accidental with boys more likely to be both bullies • The goal is to actually gain control and victims. Girls, when they do bully, over another child through physical are more likely to verbally harass or verbal aggression. someone than be physical. Boys • Usually bullies make their attack sometimes use physical attacks, but without any real reason, other than they are also more likely to threaten and they see their victim as an easy target. harass one of their peers in a verbal way. • Bullies are usually more popular with their peers than children who North Dakota State University are simply aggressive. Fargo, North Dakota 58105 Reviewed and reprinted March 2009 20 – – – 17.5 BOYS – 16 1234567890123 1234 1234567890123 – 1234 1234567890123 15 – 1234 14.5 GIRLS 1234567890123 1234 – 1234 13 1234 12.2 – 1234 12345 – 1234 12345 1234511.5 1234 12345 12345 – 1234 12345 12345 10.6 1234 12345 12345 10 – 1234 12345 12345 8.9 1234 12345 12345 12345 8.4 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 8 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 7.7 1234 12345 12345 12345 6.4 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 Percent Victims Percent 1234 12345 12345 12345 5.5 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 5 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 12343.3 123453.5 3 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 0 – 1234 12345 12345 12345 12345 1234 12345 12345 Grade 2 Grade 3 Grade 4 Grade 5 Grade 6 Grade 7 Grade 8 Grade 9 Figure 1. Percentage of student in different grades who reported being bullied (being exposed to direct bullying). (total number of boys = 42,390; total number of girls = 40,940.) What it means to be a bully Peer rejection Researchers who are interested in how children form Living in a society where wealth and power are admired, relationships with their peers have identified four film heroes regularly beat up and kill others, and the weak categories that describe how children relate to peers, and sick are often despised, it is no surprise that some based on having children name children that they like children have learned to imitate these values. Research has as well as children that they don t like: shown that although bullies tend to have difficulty making friends, they do gain a certain level of popularity and peer • Popular children are those that many children status for their actions. It is possible that bullies may be say they like, and few children say that they dislike. enjoying more respect and admiration from their peers, These children have developed positive social and and bullying behavior, especially among boys, can often communication skills. be considered normal behavior. • Controversial children are both actively liked and disliked by many of their peers. They tend to have good social skills, but also exhibit aggressive behavior. Causes of bullying Class clowns often fit into this category. Parental relationship • Rejected children are actively disliked by many of their peers and well liked by few of their peers. They show Bullies tend to come from families that are characterized as high rates of conflict, aggression, and immature play, having little warmth or affection. These families also report and they have trouble taking the perspective of another trouble sharing their feelings and usually rate themselves person. They also have a hard time solving problems as feeling less close to each other. Parent of bullies also tend without resorting to violence. Rejected children are often to use inconsistent discipline and little monitoring of where prone to delinquency and dropping out of school later. their children are throughout the day. Sometimes parents • Neglected children are seldom neither liked or disliked of bullies have very punitive and rigid discipline styles, by their peers. Although they are very shy, and may with physical punishment being very common. Bullies have low self-esteem, many neglected children do very also report less feelings of closeness to their siblings. well in school and are able to develop friends as they approach adolescence. School failure Bullies are usually not model students. Very often they are Bullies come most often from the rejected category, not doing well in school and do not have good connections but they sometimes are popular children as well. with their teachers. Victims can be selected from any category, although neglected children often are more likely to be victims. What it means to be a victim Long term effects of being a victim The long term consequences of being a victim vary a good Unfortunately in recent years, our attitudes have changed deal. Most victims of bullying do well in school and are about what it means to be a victim. Many parents and able to make friends are they grow older. Most victims, school officials are likely to blame victims of bullying for especially if they receive support from adults important in being weak and not being able to stand up for themselves. their lives, survive the experience of being bullied without This, coupled with the fact that victims are usually warned long term effects. by bullies not to tell anyone, makes it difficult for them to talk with parents and teachers. Short term effects of being a bully Ten percent of children could be considered extreme Even though bullies are sometimes viewed positively by victims who have been the victim of bullies at least their peers, they rarely are capable of maintaining close once a week for a long period of time. These children friendships. They are usually not doing well in school are often considered younger, weaker, or sicker by and not well liked by their teachers. their peers. Victims are just as likely to be boys as girls. They often report strong fears or dislike of going to school. Long term effects of being a bully These children often report closer feelings to parents and Bullying is a behavior that is very often one of the first siblings, but whether this causes them to be victims or steps to more serious problems. Unless some kind of is simply how they cope with being bullied is unclear. intervention takes place, the aggression of bullying often Being labeled a victim is likely to follow children around leads to more serious acts of delinquency and criminal from year to year. Most extreme victims report having activity. Bullies are also more likely to use drugs and few or no friends and being alone at recess and lunch. alcohol as adolescents. Symptoms that a child might be a victim of bullying: Suggestions for working with bullies: • acts moody, sullen, or withdraws from family interaction • Work in small groups. It is often helpful to place bullies in groups with older children and have them engage in • becomes depressed cooperative tasks. It will be necessary to provide a great • loses interest in school work, or grades drop deal of supervision. • loses appetite or has difficulty getting to sleep • Reinforce children each time they engage in some • waits to use the bathroom at home degree of caring or pro-social behavior. It will be easier to establish more appropriate rules for interaction after • arrives home with torn clothes, unexplained bruises they learn that there are more positive ways to gain • asks for extra money for school lunch or supplies, attention and affection. extra allowance • Often children who are having a hard time relating to • refuses to go to school (15 percent of all school other children can learn some social skills with pets.